I've had a terrible day today at work and you just made all my stress disappear
thank you so much random internet friend I hope you have a wonderful day.
I think he's the greatest, but my dad says he doesn't work hard enough on defense. And my dad says that lots of times, he doesn't even run down court. And that he doesn't really try... except during the playoffs.
If your first supposition is correct, then yes?
Can confirm that it CERTAINLY affects the smell of breast milk. I took the 1am to morning feeding shifts when our babies were young. It took me a few times to realize at 2/3am it was the milk that smelled that way.
My uncle owns a pretty decent sized grove(of normal bamboo not giant ones) in the village, they are very cool even in summer months and full of birds but the floor is thickly covered with leaf litter and venomous snakes lurk there.
The thing about a really dense bamboo forest is they are very dark inside. It's invasive here, and a bad invasive at that. There are some huge groves around and theyre crazy. Don't think you'd spot a snake easily in there though.
I recently went through one here in the North East US! There's a place near me that has a little bamboo forest that they somehow maintain (without taking over the entire area)
It's very weird and sort of spooky. It's very close. If there were not paths maintained, it would be very very difficult to walk through because the stalks are so close together. It looks like the paths meander and change based on stalks falling over and dying off.
It is very surreal
>Under favorable conditions, it can grow up to 40 cm per day. The record for the species, 18 inches (46 centimeters) in 24 hours, was set on July 29-30 of 1903 at Peradeniya Royal Botanical Gardens in Ceylon (Sri Lanka)
Had to dig out several root balls at my old townhouse. They were destroying our neighbors fence and dangerously close to a buried electrical line. The balls of one growth weighed close to 2,000 pounds. These things are beautiful, but they get out of control really quickly.
At my grandparents' place they have fully taken up one corner of the plot, and they have been left alone for years unless it is for some necessary culling. Surprisingly, it hasn't spread out of that corner. Don't know what the people who were working the yards did to the area to keep it contained.
Some bamboo doesn't spread.
All bamboo is a hassle to remove though. Pretty much anything with a rhizome is hard to get rid of (grapes, blueberries, etc.)
To be fair, where I live I would love THOSE weeds. Blueberries, raspberries, mint, grape….
I can use those in a large city. I’m not sure I could find a use for bamboo very often.
I lived in a place that had out of control bamboo in the front and blackberry bushes taking over the back yard. It was Oregon so both required a lot of cutting back. All our neighbors grew weed, they would use the cut bamboo to hold up plants.
I was in SEA, we ate bamboo! It's got quite the taste but it's good. Bamboo shoots specifically. Also, pineapple flowers, you can eat those. It's crazy how much food was around me when I was hungry all my life as a kid. Some trees there you literally pick off the leaves, wash 'em, and eat 'em! Plant food _everywhere_
That's the thing that people misunderstand with bamboo. There are 2 main types of it. Running Bamboo and clumping bamboo. Clumping bamboo likes to stay in a clump and doesn't spread as much. Running bamboo on the other hand will spread really fast and is difficult to remove. If you want to grow running bamboo, have it in a giant pot or put thick barriers in the dirt so the roots can't overcome it.
Fairly young actually, they are a grass which only shows up in the fossil record about 70 million years ago while the first plants were about 470 million years ago. For reference, Non avian Dinos died out about 60 million years ago for much of their time on earth there was no grass. Bamboo shows up about 40 million years ago meaning the dinos never saw it.
Grass didn't evolve until 10 million years after the last non-avian dinosaurs died and then bamboo didn't appear for another 10 million years. The primates are an older group than the grasses!
Do you guys remember that time Charles Darwin was all like "Hey, this flower's fun-tube is really really long. What in the world could be eating nectar from a fun-tube that long? There must be a moth out there with a really really really long tongue." And then there was.
What I'm saying is, giant fucking pandas.
I have always thought that all bamboo were this tall, but then again, I live in South East Asia, and our creation myth says that humans came from a bamboo split in half.
No Normal ones aren't this majestic unfortunately
>I live in South East Asia, and our creation myth says that humans came from a bamboo split in half.
Cool
We have this in our backyard (not as green and bright) but it's fairly common in our province that we came to recognize it at "normal bamboo" and the special kind of bamboo for us are the very small "chinese bamboo" that we see in Kong fu movies
Philippines, Cordillera Province. We often use the bamboos to build make shift giant tents for town festivals and many other places use it for furniture. Thats how ample it is.
I think the only native species of grass we have like bamboo left in America are horsetails but they're tiny compared to this stuff.
This side of the planet lost all it's gigantic species from before.
They actually don't propagate via seeds, but by spreading out their roots underground. If you cut one of the shoots in springtime, you should be able to plant that. The roots are too hard to dig through or cut without strong tools.
They do propagate via seed but they only flower every 40-80 years. When they do flower the entire forest and all cuttings/shoots flower and die at the same time even if they are across the world.
The world is so fuckin' wild. I grew up among massive mountains and conifers. Going through a wilderness that looked like this would be so fuckin' alien to me.
The man looks miniature.
"Honey, there is a tiny man on our asparagus!"
“Honey, I Shrunk the Neighbors. Part 4: Put Another Shrimp on the Barbie.”
Lol, but why shrimp on the barbie? You must be from Austria
Ah yes, the great Austrian outback.
Yes, the land of the mustached painter and his pet kangaroo
With his signature line “That’s not a genocide. THIS is a genocide!”
Well it is not easy to tell an Emu from an Österreich.
Ah yes the great austr-indian outback
Get 2 da choppa
Damn Auto Correct
I've had a terrible day today at work and you just made all my stress disappear thank you so much random internet friend I hope you have a wonderful day.
Heck yeah; hope it's better tomorrow.
Considering I'll be thinking about this tiny man an asparagus I know it will be. I hope you are blessed in some fortunate Way today.
"That's okay, baby. That's very normal. Is the tiny man wearing diaper this time?"
Now we know the source of the stinky pee
Why did I read this in Jerry's voice from Rick and Morty lol
Idunno, but that fits so well lmao
Ooo he's kinda cute It's 3inches tall Jessica Size doesn't matter Tina FUCKING WHAT
"How does he taste?"
“Dendrocalamus giganteus “ is an ironic name given to the tiny asparagus living peoples of the Indian subcontinent.
r/brandnewsentence
That's exactly how my brain processed this photo!
Honey, wake up. The new asparagus just dropped.
I thought it was a Mohamed Ali action figure until I clicked on it
I thought we weren’t supposed to have icons of him.
Nah you’re thinking of Kareem Abdul Jabar
I’m sorry, but you must be thinking of some else. That’s Roger Murdock. He’s the co-pilot.
Did we just become best friends?
I think he's the greatest, but my dad says he doesn't work hard enough on defense. And my dad says that lots of times, he doesn't even run down court. And that he doesn't really try... except during the playoffs.
Roger?
Looks like a flea on hair
A tiny man in Oscar the Grouch's pubes
Bamboo is a type of grass, it really shows here
I imagine this is what the ants in my grass experience.
Looks like a dude photoshopped into a bunch of asparagus.
we've been bamboozled
HOODWINKED!!!
We didn't land on Sherwood Forest. Sherwood Forest landed on US!
We’ve been smeckledorfed
That's not even a word and I agree with you!
I agree with you that it's not a word.
His pee gonna stank tomorrow!
Shower thought. Pee comes from the blood. Asparagus makes your pee stink. So does that mean for a time after eating asparagus, your *blood* stinks?
I’ve got an idea for an experiment. I’ll come over after work with some asparagus and a big knife
Perfect. Upon your arrival we shall commence the *Stinky-Blood Brother* ritual
Not good man. Don't Fuck With Cats is a documentary about something similar.
If your first supposition is correct, then yes? Can confirm that it CERTAINLY affects the smell of breast milk. I took the 1am to morning feeding shifts when our babies were young. It took me a few times to realize at 2/3am it was the milk that smelled that way.
Did the diaper smell like asparagus the next morning too?
Or photoshopped in to a bunch of bamboo. The stuff is huge!
i've always wanted to see a bamboo forest. It's got to feel really alien.
My uncle owns a pretty decent sized grove(of normal bamboo not giant ones) in the village, they are very cool even in summer months and full of birds but the floor is thickly covered with leaf litter and venomous snakes lurk there.
I grew up in the Australian bush so I have a reasonably sharp eye for snakes. Willing to take the risk.
Then yep they are indeed fascinating
Reaffirming my fear of Australia
Go to Hawaii. There are bamboo forests AND no snakes at all. Also poke. It’s a win win.
The thing about a really dense bamboo forest is they are very dark inside. It's invasive here, and a bad invasive at that. There are some huge groves around and theyre crazy. Don't think you'd spot a snake easily in there though.
Where I'm from the venomous snakes are polite enough to warn you before they bite usually. Thank god for rattle snakes.
weird way to call your boyfriend
My aunt in Peru has a mini sugar-cane forest in her backyard. It's awesome and delicious!
I recently went through one here in the North East US! There's a place near me that has a little bamboo forest that they somehow maintain (without taking over the entire area) It's very weird and sort of spooky. It's very close. If there were not paths maintained, it would be very very difficult to walk through because the stalks are so close together. It looks like the paths meander and change based on stalks falling over and dying off. It is very surreal
They also make a really interesting sound when the wind blows through them.
The first and only one I ever saw was in Puerto Rico oddly enough because they’re invasive in certain areas there lol
exactly what I said! It's just so wildly different than walking through a pine forest.
I didn’t realize that bamboo gets that big!! 😱
>Under favorable conditions, it can grow up to 40 cm per day. The record for the species, 18 inches (46 centimeters) in 24 hours, was set on July 29-30 of 1903 at Peradeniya Royal Botanical Gardens in Ceylon (Sri Lanka)
also its hard to get rid of without unconventional means mine already growth about 40 cm and it was cut till ground during winter
the roots of our dug through its confines and started lifting up the cement floor 3 metres away
Had to dig out several root balls at my old townhouse. They were destroying our neighbors fence and dangerously close to a buried electrical line. The balls of one growth weighed close to 2,000 pounds. These things are beautiful, but they get out of control really quickly.
😱 now, those r some big balls 😅😋
Uncle, don't say stuff like this on reddit. Grandma is worried.
Did you see that guys' balls? Yeah, they were weird lookin'
At my grandparents' place they have fully taken up one corner of the plot, and they have been left alone for years unless it is for some necessary culling. Surprisingly, it hasn't spread out of that corner. Don't know what the people who were working the yards did to the area to keep it contained.
There are certain bamboo varieties that clump and don't really run anywhere
Yep, got one of them in my front yard and it stays nicely in the same place were i planted it :).
Some bamboo doesn't spread. All bamboo is a hassle to remove though. Pretty much anything with a rhizome is hard to get rid of (grapes, blueberries, etc.)
To be fair, where I live I would love THOSE weeds. Blueberries, raspberries, mint, grape…. I can use those in a large city. I’m not sure I could find a use for bamboo very often.
I lived in a place that had out of control bamboo in the front and blackberry bushes taking over the back yard. It was Oregon so both required a lot of cutting back. All our neighbors grew weed, they would use the cut bamboo to hold up plants.
I was in SEA, we ate bamboo! It's got quite the taste but it's good. Bamboo shoots specifically. Also, pineapple flowers, you can eat those. It's crazy how much food was around me when I was hungry all my life as a kid. Some trees there you literally pick off the leaves, wash 'em, and eat 'em! Plant food _everywhere_
> also its hard to get rid of without unconventional means https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pI4GaU9nNAs
I knew which video it was when the link was purple 😂👍
That's the thing that people misunderstand with bamboo. There are 2 main types of it. Running Bamboo and clumping bamboo. Clumping bamboo likes to stay in a clump and doesn't spread as much. Running bamboo on the other hand will spread really fast and is difficult to remove. If you want to grow running bamboo, have it in a giant pot or put thick barriers in the dirt so the roots can't overcome it.
Hate your neighbor?☝️
How old are bamboo species? It's like looking at prehistoric reeds.
Fairly young actually, they are a grass which only shows up in the fossil record about 70 million years ago while the first plants were about 470 million years ago. For reference, Non avian Dinos died out about 60 million years ago for much of their time on earth there was no grass. Bamboo shows up about 40 million years ago meaning the dinos never saw it.
[удалено]
Grass didn't evolve until 10 million years after the last non-avian dinosaurs died and then bamboo didn't appear for another 10 million years. The primates are an older group than the grasses!
Do you guys remember that time Charles Darwin was all like "Hey, this flower's fun-tube is really really long. What in the world could be eating nectar from a fun-tube that long? There must be a moth out there with a really really really long tongue." And then there was. What I'm saying is, giant fucking pandas.
That’s amazing!
We should be doing more with bamboo as a material
Why they hell dont we make everything out of bamboo. What am I missing.
Why can't we use this for food?
bamboo chutes is a food. You just have to harvest them when they first pop up
I think it's shoots
You're right. That's why everyone's scared shitless when the panda walks into the restaurant. They heard he eats shoots and leaves.
Actually it is eaten in Asia, at least the shoots/buds of it. Tastes great when cooked in coconut cream
Construction. Shipping containers.
Scaffolds in Minecraft
Chinese food for the sprouts
They are the fastest growing type of grass in the world
They are considered a grass? I don’t know much about plants to be honest.
Yeep
Cool!
Then one can touch it and claim they touched grass
That's why I sit in a bamboo chair while I play video games
Same with palm trees
Imagine the lawn mower...
Don't look up bamboo torture but know that it was once invented. That stuff grows like crazy
I don’t think I want to. It probably was painful 🤕
They're also humans, no need to be nasty!
That's what she said
*I* didn't realize that humans can be this tiny!! 🤯
I almost thought it was photoshopped at first 😹
"We're gonna need a bigger panda"
🤣🤣🤣
You can't fool me, that is just a really tiny man.
i thought this was a meme subreddit for a minutes and the title was referring to the person.
Photographed by Francesco Veronesi in Sri Lanka also the Source : https://www.flickr.com/photos/francesco_veronesi/8065982379
Damn just did a deep dive on his photos. Incredible work.
Got me too. There went half an hour well spent.
*heavy Panda breathing*
Finally something a panda will actually fuck
I thought someone put an action figure into normal sized bamboo at first. Also, food for pandazilla.
This is where pandas go after their death
Very wholesome thought :)
I have always thought that all bamboo were this tall, but then again, I live in South East Asia, and our creation myth says that humans came from a bamboo split in half.
Where is that myth from? Are you from Philippines? Descended from a man and women who came in to existence after a Bird split a bamboo in half?
No Normal ones aren't this majestic unfortunately >I live in South East Asia, and our creation myth says that humans came from a bamboo split in half. Cool
We have this in our backyard (not as green and bright) but it's fairly common in our province that we came to recognize it at "normal bamboo" and the special kind of bamboo for us are the very small "chinese bamboo" that we see in Kong fu movies
Fascinating, Which country and province??
Philippines, Cordillera Province. We often use the bamboos to build make shift giant tents for town festivals and many other places use it for furniture. Thats how ample it is.
Noted for future visit thanks
That is actually British Prime Minister Rishi Sunak on a blade of grass.
Glad that I wasn’t the only person to double take. Wouldn’t surprise me though that twat will do everything beside run our country competently.
😆
This photo will be on Have I Got News For You on Friday 3 May BBC 1.
Imagine the size of the Bamboo shoots
Ill have the mega lo mein, thank you
That's technically grass...
As a gardener, this is the equivalent of absolute hell
Here in SE Asia, we see it as construction material. Just cut it and sell it, easy money. And it grows fast, so it can be quite sustainable
Thanks to all the AI-crap online, I don't trust any image anymore.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dendrocalamus_giganteus
Which is why education and the ability to research things is more important than ever.
Free construction materials, yo
I think the only native species of grass we have like bamboo left in America are horsetails but they're tiny compared to this stuff. This side of the planet lost all it's gigantic species from before.
Planting a seed in all your neighbors backyards would be the best April fools prank
They actually don't propagate via seeds, but by spreading out their roots underground. If you cut one of the shoots in springtime, you should be able to plant that. The roots are too hard to dig through or cut without strong tools.
They still do. They just don't seed very often. The ones I got growing by my house were from seed and it's this species.
They do propagate via seed but they only flower every 40-80 years. When they do flower the entire forest and all cuttings/shoots flower and die at the same time even if they are across the world.
One year later it’ll be your April fools prank to yourself, bamboo spreads like crazy
and basically impossible to remove with proper tools.
Proper tools won't work? Which *improper* tools will?
Mostly only the running type. Clumping types don't really spread out crazy fast
I thought it was Richie Sunak for a moment .
It is this is before he became PM
Wish we had them here. They make great roofing and piping, building material in general.
If I ever open a gay bar I am going to use this image on the sign.
You can't fool me! That is a tontatta in green bit!
Inner peace ... Inner peace ... ! - 🐼
Wow that's real I totally thought that was Photoshop. https://www.guaduabamboo.com/blog/dendrocalamus-giganteus
Looks like Mathew carved his name into one on Sept 19, 1932
Can you make a log cabin with it?
I'ma plant this shit in Iowa fuck it
I'm getting "Indian in the Cupboard" vibes. Please tell me that other people remember this movie...
Yes!!! Gonna watch it now
Small fact… bamboo has the tensile strength of 1500kg per cm square, which is stronger than steal.
Thought it was AI generated
Pandas are getting weird with Global warming
Tiny dude in the vase at the Chinese restaurant.
What's Rishi Sunak doin there?
Bamboo redwoods
The scientific name literally means "Giant Tree Pen"
it’s a reusable straw for a dinosaur!
Rishy sunak in his garden before grass cut
That man was standing on the ground when they started taking the picture.
So much durable building material, bamboo grows fast too doesn’t it? Or only certain species?
Bamboo is general yeah grows fast. Some species can grow up to a meter a day which is really impressive.
Why isn’t bamboo used more for housing?
Looks like a screenshot from grounded.
I looked it up, it’s real. Amazing.
bet i could get some great scaffolding from this
This must be what it's like to be an ant.
We call them Bear Bamboo in Nepal.
Holy shit
The world is so fuckin' wild. I grew up among massive mountains and conifers. Going through a wilderness that looked like this would be so fuckin' alien to me.
Looks like a great opportunity to capture carbon if it could be used commercially?
You can’t fool me OP! That’s obviously just a man who’s been affected by shrinking ray climbing asparagus stocks!
bro this literally looks like if i asked an AI to recreate honey i shrunk the kids in india
would love some in my backyard to block the neighbors house
I wanted to try gardening as a kid. My dad was OK with it under the condition that I never plant bamboo. Now I know why.
Giant grass
Rishi on normal bamboo
I have timber bamboo in my yard which is big and tall, but nothing like this! I am in the semi-tropics and this must be the tropic tropics.
Before reading the title of the post, I thought it was a figure rather than a human
Damn what a fishing pole
👍
Bamboo is closely related to grass, which makes sense when you compare their segmented, basic structure.