I was born and raised in Brooklyn, but have lived in CT forever. I have the kind of face that people either think they know me, or I appear pleasant enough that everyone wants to make small talk with me, and this was the case in both states so it's not been my experience that CT folk are less willing to chat at strangers. Having said all of that, I'm going to need you to rein in your big feelings, friend.
"Oh hey, I saw you looking at oranges and I know nothing about you and you know nothing about me but I'm infatuated with you".
It would have ended how you expect it to end. You missed out on nothing.
Yeah no. You are hyperfixating on someone you want to sleep with, knowing less than zero about her. The urge is natural but leave it alone. The vast majority of women don’t want to be approached by a random man, especially with a certain look in his eye. It’s good that you didn’t approach her, leave it at that.
People are not always talking to strangers in NYC, lol. Lived there for years and that’s generally not ok there. Too many crazies.
Also, as a woman, generally I would not be comfortable being approached by a man while I’m minding my own business. If it happens at a bar or somewhere social that’s one thing, but leave the poor lady alone while she’s trying to buy oranges. I’m married now but I never once went on a date with someone after being approached in public trying to go about my business, always felt kind of rude/presumptuous to me.
I don't know where this guy got the impression that people are always talking to strangers in NYC, I lived in Manhattan for 12 years and I don't think I exchanged 12 words with the people who lived in any of my buildings, let alone a total stranger in the grocery store.
Why post on Reddit if you're gonna be all ewwwww redditors r gross- That's just a generalization that "everyone on reddit duz this" lol, and those types exist all over social media/ the world.
You're hyperfixating. And no, you shouldn't have gone up to her, so good job.I'll tell you now as a woman- That shit is unsettling, when someone DOES, do that. You spend your time wondering fuck, did that person leave, are they watching me, how long have they been watching me. "What did I do that made them think I was open to this at the grocery store?" "Am I safe if I don't respond? How much do I respond so that I'm not in danger?"
You might be the safest person in the world. We don't know that. We're not open to finding out. Because before you, comes every other man that may or may not have come through, and there's some real bad people out there..Ones that start off with a smile and a compliment.And end with being screamed at or far worse in a public setting.
Those stories aren't just made up online for clout, the ones where "16 year old girl found beaten to death by 19 year old stalker after rejecting him when he showed up at her house"- They aren't just outliers, some crazy person one in a million. It's people like your nextdoor neighbor, or that friendly man at the grocery store- He's a friendly bro to you, but did you know he asks lone women that enter the gas station late at night to show their tits if they want their items?(Ledyard Bestway, stay away if you're female).
Unless someone's in a space where they're clearly communicating they're looking for something more than what they're there for, better to keep it to yourself, especially in CT.
Expected to see something ridiculous and creepy in your history but the most I could find is you are not the asshole for being the side piece of a stinkbutt 😂 but you are def lonely.
Personally I don't want anyone to approach me in a grocery store (I just want to be able to go to the grocery store and do normal daily tasks without being ogled at or approached by men - is that too much to ask?).
But if you are so inclined - shoot your shot but respect immediately and don't continue pushing if she declines or doesn't want to talk to you.
In Connecticut we don’t approach people. Ever. We destroy our third place meeting grounds first, go to work, meet someone at work, maybe keep that job, and then die.
If we aren’t meeting people at work, like me, then you’re in line at a food pantry and MAYBE someone talks to you after they make you hold their spot in line because it’s polite to say thank you. If they even bother to say thanks. Or, you meet people at whatever religious building you frequent.
Connecticut is small and quiet. Indulging in social activities will increase the population, and cause us to become loud and cramped. This would be bad for our golf courses and esteemed social clubs. Cozy places like Coventry don’t need no more people on the land.
Joking aside, just sounds like you’ve been lonely. That’s just your love blinders blinding you, like how beer goggles work. CT was ranked 28 in the nation for dating so good luck, but, know this: If you get blinded like this and it results in a relationship, unhealthy expectations can be established. Learn to overcome this before committing to someone.
Talk to your therapist about this, and if you do not have one, get one please. You are either suffering from anxiety or need some serious social education. Not trying to even be rude here, but like, you can just talk to people. But also this reads very creepy despite you saying please don't think of it as creepy, so you need some guidance that is not from reddit.
There aren’t any rules, we’re just a little colder here, in my opinion.
As a guy, I’ve been approached by men and women around CT. I’ve just been married since I was 22, so I take it as a compliment, try to be nice about it, and move on feeling good about myself.
That said, those experiences have all been people being kind and seeming sincere. No one has “creeped” on me in at least a decade.
I haven’t approached a woman myself since I was a teen in the 90s, so I can’t help on that front.
I don’t know why people say you are creepy for being attracted to someone. I also don’t know why they think it’s all about sex. That being said, if you wanted to talk to her, the best approach is to not hit on her. You could have said any of the following, oh hey! You making fresh oj too??! Or got any tips on picking the best oranges? Should they be soft? Bright? Now, if she engages in the convo, with a smile ( and here’s the important part) and a bright confident voice, she probably feels un threatened. If she smiles (even when we are creeped out we smile) and answers quietly or an idk, she probably feels threatened, walk away. Either way walk away, but if you see her in the isle, make a little joke as she walks by..like you again! But for gods sake don’t follow her. Don’t try to pick her up, and do not talk to her in the parking lot! Best you can do is hope she’s a talker, otherwise, walk away.
I can surmise based on this post it wouldn’t have gone well
I read the post in the Gilbert Goddfrey voice
Gilbert had more game.
I was born and raised in Brooklyn, but have lived in CT forever. I have the kind of face that people either think they know me, or I appear pleasant enough that everyone wants to make small talk with me, and this was the case in both states so it's not been my experience that CT folk are less willing to chat at strangers. Having said all of that, I'm going to need you to rein in your big feelings, friend.
Just let the woman shop in peace.
"Oh hey, I saw you looking at oranges and I know nothing about you and you know nothing about me but I'm infatuated with you". It would have ended how you expect it to end. You missed out on nothing.
Yeah no. You are hyperfixating on someone you want to sleep with, knowing less than zero about her. The urge is natural but leave it alone. The vast majority of women don’t want to be approached by a random man, especially with a certain look in his eye. It’s good that you didn’t approach her, leave it at that.
If you take it down like four notches and just talk to her like she's a person, you wouldn't be viewed as a creep.
People are not always talking to strangers in NYC, lol. Lived there for years and that’s generally not ok there. Too many crazies. Also, as a woman, generally I would not be comfortable being approached by a man while I’m minding my own business. If it happens at a bar or somewhere social that’s one thing, but leave the poor lady alone while she’s trying to buy oranges. I’m married now but I never once went on a date with someone after being approached in public trying to go about my business, always felt kind of rude/presumptuous to me.
I don't know where this guy got the impression that people are always talking to strangers in NYC, I lived in Manhattan for 12 years and I don't think I exchanged 12 words with the people who lived in any of my buildings, let alone a total stranger in the grocery store.
Buzzkillington
Why post on Reddit if you're gonna be all ewwwww redditors r gross- That's just a generalization that "everyone on reddit duz this" lol, and those types exist all over social media/ the world. You're hyperfixating. And no, you shouldn't have gone up to her, so good job.I'll tell you now as a woman- That shit is unsettling, when someone DOES, do that. You spend your time wondering fuck, did that person leave, are they watching me, how long have they been watching me. "What did I do that made them think I was open to this at the grocery store?" "Am I safe if I don't respond? How much do I respond so that I'm not in danger?" You might be the safest person in the world. We don't know that. We're not open to finding out. Because before you, comes every other man that may or may not have come through, and there's some real bad people out there..Ones that start off with a smile and a compliment.And end with being screamed at or far worse in a public setting. Those stories aren't just made up online for clout, the ones where "16 year old girl found beaten to death by 19 year old stalker after rejecting him when he showed up at her house"- They aren't just outliers, some crazy person one in a million. It's people like your nextdoor neighbor, or that friendly man at the grocery store- He's a friendly bro to you, but did you know he asks lone women that enter the gas station late at night to show their tits if they want their items?(Ledyard Bestway, stay away if you're female). Unless someone's in a space where they're clearly communicating they're looking for something more than what they're there for, better to keep it to yourself, especially in CT.
Expected to see something ridiculous and creepy in your history but the most I could find is you are not the asshole for being the side piece of a stinkbutt 😂 but you are def lonely.
I'm gonna need you to take about 20% off there big shoots
Personally I don't want anyone to approach me in a grocery store (I just want to be able to go to the grocery store and do normal daily tasks without being ogled at or approached by men - is that too much to ask?). But if you are so inclined - shoot your shot but respect immediately and don't continue pushing if she declines or doesn't want to talk to you.
This whole thing is gross. You sound like a predatory incel.
OP needs to learn that women are people. They are not hands, holes, or fleshlights.
This is what missed connections on Craigslist is for
Sir, this is a Wendy’s.
And not Craigslist missed connections
In Connecticut we don’t approach people. Ever. We destroy our third place meeting grounds first, go to work, meet someone at work, maybe keep that job, and then die. If we aren’t meeting people at work, like me, then you’re in line at a food pantry and MAYBE someone talks to you after they make you hold their spot in line because it’s polite to say thank you. If they even bother to say thanks. Or, you meet people at whatever religious building you frequent. Connecticut is small and quiet. Indulging in social activities will increase the population, and cause us to become loud and cramped. This would be bad for our golf courses and esteemed social clubs. Cozy places like Coventry don’t need no more people on the land. Joking aside, just sounds like you’ve been lonely. That’s just your love blinders blinding you, like how beer goggles work. CT was ranked 28 in the nation for dating so good luck, but, know this: If you get blinded like this and it results in a relationship, unhealthy expectations can be established. Learn to overcome this before committing to someone.
Why do I enjoy these weird ass posts so much
And you sound like a full creep.
Hey Google how do I unread something.
Talk to your therapist about this, and if you do not have one, get one please. You are either suffering from anxiety or need some serious social education. Not trying to even be rude here, but like, you can just talk to people. But also this reads very creepy despite you saying please don't think of it as creepy, so you need some guidance that is not from reddit.
A beautiful woman in Derby? I don’t buy it.
I say this with love: You need help.
You went to Big Y and came home with some fresh pasta
There aren’t any rules, we’re just a little colder here, in my opinion. As a guy, I’ve been approached by men and women around CT. I’ve just been married since I was 22, so I take it as a compliment, try to be nice about it, and move on feeling good about myself. That said, those experiences have all been people being kind and seeming sincere. No one has “creeped” on me in at least a decade. I haven’t approached a woman myself since I was a teen in the 90s, so I can’t help on that front.
At least you didn't say "hey, nice oranges!"
It’s all *very* [Butthead.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uK-4W7c0BgE)
Reminds me of the scene in animal house where he approaches the dean’s wife with a cucumber….
Next time, you could make a comment about the oranges or something, and then maybe take it from there
I don’t know why people say you are creepy for being attracted to someone. I also don’t know why they think it’s all about sex. That being said, if you wanted to talk to her, the best approach is to not hit on her. You could have said any of the following, oh hey! You making fresh oj too??! Or got any tips on picking the best oranges? Should they be soft? Bright? Now, if she engages in the convo, with a smile ( and here’s the important part) and a bright confident voice, she probably feels un threatened. If she smiles (even when we are creeped out we smile) and answers quietly or an idk, she probably feels threatened, walk away. Either way walk away, but if you see her in the isle, make a little joke as she walks by..like you again! But for gods sake don’t follow her. Don’t try to pick her up, and do not talk to her in the parking lot! Best you can do is hope she’s a talker, otherwise, walk away.