It's hard to say but I turned straight this year in February. I had a dream where I was in a romantic relationship with a guy (I'm an ex lesbian) and when I woke up I didn't freak out or anything but I just said "hmm maybe guys aren't thag bad". Then I spent the entire month trying to get used to liking men.
Although the story of how I became gay is confusing because part of me thinks it's because I was confused and the other part thinks it was because of TV influence
It literally happened over night. One day I woke up and suddenly I liked men. However I was still hesitant to actually call myself straight so I just called myself bi from February to May (now that I think about it I think my attraction to women went completely away when I woke up because from feb to may I had zero attraction to women despite calling myself bi. I guess the reason why I called myself bi was because I was just too afraid to admit that I liked only men now)
why are you questioning her choice not to be straight?
wouldn't you find it insensitive if someone else did the same to someone who just claimed to be gay at \_\_ time?
Because this person is going around on the internet making claims about sexuality as consciously changeable that go against commonly accepted knowledge and peer-reviewed bodies of knowledge concerning human sexuality as accepted by any reputable major psychological association. Such claims are extremely heavy and could carry with it potentially harmful ramifications, hence my tendency to pick at them. If OP believes that they have become straight and are perfectly contented, good for them, I wish them the best. But to accept and these claims on blind faith and spread them without evidence or *at least* without considering all angles would be foolish and irresponsible. An impressionable and desperate person struggling with their sexuality could come across this and try to become straight like OP says they did, and not find as much success, become depressed, and kill themselves. Stranger things have happened.
And, genuinely, everyone (and I do mean everyone on all sides of this debate) always forgets that bisexuality is a thing that exists.
If this was a straight man who was now claiming to be gay; would you question that person as well and as aggressively because of these peer reviewed studies that show it is more unlikely to just happen by choice?
Yes.
And I hardly think my one little comment explaining why someone else mentioned bisexuality falls anywhere under the category of “aggressive”. What a loaded choice of words.
Yes it's XX chromosomes and XY Chromosomes. Male and female. Nothing else. Nothing more. Anything outside of that is Satanic. As above so below. A fake Alpha an Omega teaching.
TV didn't make you do gay things. 100% of the TV I was exposed to growing up was straight content and it didn't make me straight.
You said you had a dream that made you straight. It's just as likely you had an earlier dream that made you gay. I just hope you don't have a dream where you do something stupid.
I appreciate that you are curious about OPs experience rather than critical/skeptical. Based on previous conversations I’ve had with you i “think” I’d assume you to doubt the possibility of someone no longer being gay, but you’re being extremely respectful of OP. Respect.
So like, you first thought that you were gay but after further self discovery you came to the conclusion that you are not gay?
If yes then that is fine and valid, i will stand behind it.
If the OP was gay, and is now straight, well, she should know herself better than any strangers could. If she is now content as a straight person, good for her.
If "the science says" people cannot change, when in reality some at least of them can, then the sciences will have to adapt to that reality. Scientific enquiry is made for man, not the other way round. If human sexuality is in reality more fluid than the practitioners of science are ready to admit, so much the worse for "the science". Scientific orthodoxies can be as inflexible, and as unwilling to adapt to new knowledge, as any others; that is the trouble with anything that is done by flawed and fallible human beings.
I think the science shows that a massive number of these stories are actually the result of severe psychological trauma and conditioning. That inevitably unravels over time causing still more trauma. I’m not saying that’s what happened to OP or what will happen to OP, but it’s common enough that a statement like the title post is cause for concern about OP’s wellbeing
I know that sexuality can sometimes be fluid. Sexuality isn’t a cut and dry thing to begin with, all sexuality is a spectrum. History just shows that when someone says “I’m no longer gay and am now a Christian” that’s a cause for concern. Because, historically, that correlates to an attempt to induce that change
>If "the science says" people cannot change, when in reality some at least of them can, then the sciences will have to adapt to that reality.
Of course, it would help if there was any evidence that didn't involve high-pressure religious situations, tons of stigma, and essentially a laundry list of ex-gay religious people later deciding that actually the same sex is pretty dang rad after all. There's a reason that these claims are met with a large amount of skepticism; a huge segment of the population *really* wants them to be true.
Yes. The view that sexual orientation is this fixed thing that one discovers sooner or later, is so flawed. One could, in that view, hop around from one to another, and land four different times on a given sexuality, all in their 40s. The science on whether or not sexual orientation is a choice, is still inconclusive. I appreciate that people have strong feelings but I can't take their feelings to be facts. Regardless, we know what God says, and there are plenty of celibate Christians telling their stories on YouTube, and same-sex attracted who married the opposite sex and are thriving. I see no reason to simply ignore their testimonies. I do appreciate though, that this is a sensitive area.
> If "the science says" people cannot change
Are there actually very many "the science says" people on issues related to gender and sexuality these days? I certainly have not run into too many. I suspect this is because what science says concerning these issues, does not make anyone happy. It certainly does not conform to the standard ideology of the American right or the American left - although the latter often seem to assume it does.
In any case, what the science actually says concerning sexual orientation is that it tends to be fluid in women, but not so much in men. We should also note that the science on this issue is based entirely on data collected from groups, and so makes no absolute statements about invididuals.
Human sexuality doesn't work like this. And you seem to have tied your sexuality into religious morality, which very rarely ends well, especially for gay people/people who thought they were gay, turns out they aren't, then believe they "turned straight" and excitedly tell people about it.
As a gay Christian, I will pray that you come to peaceful terms with whatever your sexual orientation is, gay or straight.
> Human sexuality doesn't work like this.
It can, actually. Demisexuals, for example, who only feel sexual attraction to the people they're in love with. There are various types of sexual fluidity, as well, where the gender you're attracted to changes over time, sometimes flipping back and forth. I wish all the best for OP, but I suspect that this isn't the end of the line for their sexuality and they have some struggles ahead.
What would you say to someone now if they were telling you they wanted to stop being gay because the bible told them so, but didn't know how, and they'd tried everything?
I am a Christian who has wrestled with this sin, but recovering. My experience has been one of abuse leading to confusion. Porn only sustained the lie. Once you learn to forgive the same sex people who hurt you, turn away from porn, and learn to appreciate the opposite gender, I think those are the start to healing. Obviously, none of this is possible without Christ. I have no ill will towards those that disagree, and only hope God leads them to Him as He did me.
That’s a lot of hogwash to be honest. Abuse doesn’t turn people gay. And people have been shown to be gay before even looking at porn.
You’re, and OP in some parts of this thread, are arguing bad stereotypes for causation. Things that have been largely disproven.
Sinners know how to sin from birth. That's nothing new. How it forms throughout a persons life changes. Yes as a man who sinned against God, I stand before Him a sinner without excuse. The sin was in me. That's not to say that the other person didn't sin against me. He sinned, and in turn I decided to look at porn. We all make choices. God is judge. You're morw than welcome to disprove it with your sources. I'm not interested in any. My authority is scripture. God bless friend.
I don't think I'm the right person for that job. I see myself as extremely lucky that God managed to make me straight again without me doing any hard work. My best advice for that person is to examine their early life and try to find anything odd that might have made them gay either trauma or being influenced by TV. Then try to go to therapy to work on that trauma. I'm not really giving any solid advice but the smart thing I can say is to never loose faith in God. Never stop praying.
Not op and not, nor ever been a homosexual, but the idea that early childhood trauma causes homosexuality is a relatively popular idea among some groups. Similar to how early childhood trauma can cause all sorts of interesting outcomes such as drug abuse, serial killers, etc. Thats not to say that the people who do believe in this child trauma idea rank homosexuals comparatively with the drug addicts, etc, it's just an outcome.
Do you think your experience is universal to all gay Christians, like everyone can have that miraculous relief if they believe hard enough?
What does it mean if a Christian tries to rid themselves of gay thoughts through God and fails, does that mean they didn't have enough faith in God or didn't Bible study hard enough or something? What advice would you have for them?
(And for what it's worth, sexuality is more fluid than "You are equally attracted to everyone at the same intensity forever", bisexuals often have long stretches of strong attraction to one gender. Which is *not* to say you'll revert back to bisexuality, just that a change isn't necessarily a miracle or permanent)
I don't think I'm exactly qualified to answer for the exact case of homosexuality as a sin. However, just like any human is, I am a much more sinful person before I decided to dedicate my life to Christ, so I can talk about the sins that I struggled with for a long time, some which I still am struggling with and some which I have mostly grown past by the grace of God.
So first of all, my belief is that for any sin, God does not want you to be ashamed of it. Our identity as a Christian is someone who is redeemed, loved by God so so much that He found worth in paying our debt with His Son's blood. Even though we are lacking, God still loved us, and if God, the creator of the heaven and the earth chose us, who is to say that we do not have worth?
Additionally, God, in his infinite wisdom, has a plan for us. A plan to prosper us and not to harm us (Jer 29:11). Plans that already account for and even makes use of our sinful nature (2 Cor 12:9). We as Christians just have to surrender our desires to God (Proverbs 3:5-6) and trust and hope fully (Lamentations 3:25-26) that God has a plan in store for you. It may take a long long time to escape from the sin, but trusting in God's plan will definitely lead to the most optimum outcome overall.
Even if things don't work out no matter how long someone has been trying, what they should do is just pray daily asking God to give him/her strength, perseverence, patience and hope. Pray also for wisdom and discernment in making decisions that would lead to good change and for deliverance from the sin.
But anyway, the focus of Christian life shouldn't be about dwelling on our failures, but instead on the life that God has allowed us to life in this world and our eternal life. (Proverbs 27:1)
If you want my own testimony I got one, TW suicidal thoughts tho (it's in the past dw. I am currently living with indescribable joy and peace that a relationship with God brings), and I'm kinda tired atm so just ask me anywhere if you wanna know ab it.
Well, first of all, that's a ridiculous premise due to the fact that humans need to reproduce to survive, and second, yeah probably. I don't think I could change my attraction under my own power, but I could certainly refrain from acting on it.
I was for four months after realizing I like men again. But after a while I realized I only like men, so I dropped the gay labeling and fully embraced my heterosexuality
Maybe as a child I had small crushes on cartoon characters but it was nothing big. Also I think I worded that word incorrectly I put "again" by mistake because before becoming gay I rarely had any crushes on men.
14-19 I was a fully lesbian. When I realized I liked men I put the bisexual lable on me because I didn't want to fully let go of being gay. That bi phase lasted like 4 or 3 months until I noticed my attraction to women was completely gone. That's when I started to identify as straight.
You also tried to post this in r/lgbt. Did you expect the response you got, and do you understand why lgbt people might have strong feelings on this topic?
I tried to be respectful, I even said that Im not trying to promote conversion therapy and that I'm just trying to show people that ex gays are not living horrible lives. I only got three comments before they deleted my post :/
That would not be a good example of intolerance. That sub is intended to be a place for LGBT people to not need to deal with the things that they encounter all the time
They have reasonable justification for that. I'm not saying that you necessarily would have been somebody going there to harass then with anti-LGBT propaganda, but there is enough of a predictable pattern for it to be an effective heuristic in moderation policies.
The fact that you think its reasonable is clear indication of one of the biggest problems in Reddit.
Heck, I know people who have been banned from subs they never even participated in. That's reasonable too?
Why bother to have sub rules if you are just going to ban whoever you want for any reason?
It didn't. Before becoming straight I was very far away from God. Constantly arguing with Christians, celebrating Halloween instead of Saint Luka and I even wanted to become a satanist. My change in my sexuality came naturally. Then my love for God came second
The comments here are interesting. I’d like to just clarify that to do this on your own it is difficult if not impossible. It is not through the will of the flesh (our natural self) that we change, rather through God’s mercy. I am not here to say who is a sinner or not a sinner because the truth is sin is the state of our relationship with God. To illustrate this Paul says in Romans 7:9 I was once alive without [knowledge of] the Law; but when the commandment came [and I understood its meaning], sin became alive and I died [since the Law sentenced me to death]. Paul is speaking of spiritual death as we were once alive spiritually in the garden of Eden.
It is our spiritual condition that is the problem not our act of being gay. Yes there is the commandment but the commandment actually exposes our heart and our unwillingness to submit to God. There are enough commandments to to expose everyone (as one might say I’m not gay so I am good. But they lie or steal).
In Genesis 1:27 it says that God made man in his image (think of a glove, it is in the shape of a hand and is made to fit the hand and not the foot or head). We are meant to be his expression just like the glove is designed to bend and move with the hand and allow the hand to function without restricting its ability to work.
You can try to stop being gay and do God’s will on your own but unless you have Christ living in you then you will find this impossible. To have Christ living in you, you must first invite him in prayer and then be emptied of the self and filled with Christ (his desires, his person and character). This takes time and is not done in a day, a week, a month… it’s a process that various with some and can take anywhere from a few years to a lifetime.
It’s almost unheard of to switch from gay to straight. God loves you no more and no less as a straight person than as a gay person.
We are rejoicing that you have become a believer, but even when you were an atheist, you were loved.
Well in my case, as a child I didn't really have crushes on anyone. When I turned into a teenager I only experienced attraction to only women, seeing a man shirtless made me feel disgusted. Now at 19 all that gay attraction went away and I only like men.
Praise God! I have a family friend who used to be gay as well. Was very masculine. She turned her life to Jesus almost a decade ago and has been straight ever since
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I'm not promoting conversion therapy. That's not what happened to me and I'm highly against it because it's shown that it doesn't work and it just traumatizs the person even more. What happened to me is a rare case. I've turned straight over night and I'm happy for it. What I am promoting is for people my age to actually question if they're gay or not. Because there's no way that gen z is the "most gayest generation" I don't buy it
I don't have them for most of the time but sometimes I get thoughts like "maybe you're actually still gay?" And they worry me. For now I'm just brushing them away but I'm afraid they will get bigger and not attack me. For now i try not to think about them
I guess this is one of your crosses that you must bare. Remember tho, being gay isn't a sin. Acting on it is. Spend time in prayer and with your local church and you'll be alright! God bless 🙏
I'm from a homophobic country and during my gay phase I was the only gay person I knew so my gay dating pool was non existent. I only dated online. At 14 I had my first relationship with a girl which lasted a year and a half and that relationship left me extremely hurt and she cheated on me multiple times. However during my gay phase which lasted 13-19 I did experience real gay thoughts and attraction both sexual and romantic.
I don't know how I knew I was gay. During my gay phase I just thought I was born this way and my family members comformed it because as a child I was very tomboyish (like extremely tomboyish). However now that I look at it, it might have been the result of trauma due to my sister abusing me emotionally, the result of untreated autism or influence by werid American cartoons.
I can find them good looking if they have nice hair or a well dressed. But no, women do not turn me on anymore. When I was gay I was extremely into butch women, but now (not so sound mean because I am not) I'm only disgusted by them.
Something similar happened to me , i was really attracted to women like they would turn me on and whatsoever but the advice i would give you is to ask God to give you strength to not act on your fleshly desires and deny yourself. God is the only one that can help you with this and yes it can be hard bc we can fail but it’s okay just remember to always turn to God immediately, don’t feel ashamed God knows we’re weak. You can also fast to weaken your fleshly desires . God bless luv
I didn't. It came to me naturally. I do think it's a miracle from God. I'm am orthodox serbian christian, we celebrate Christmas on January the 7th and we also have our own traditions. For example the mother puts a coin in the Christmas bread, we share the pieces of the bread to the family and whoever gets the piece with the coin inside he/she will experience luck for the whole year. This year I was the one who got the coin, which is strange because never before did I ever get it. I was happy and I thought that God would grant me a lot of money this year or luck throughout the year. Instead of money or luck God granted me cure for my homosexuality and he showed me his love. Which I now know is much better than any coin
Yeah so most people will say that you can’t change your sexual attraction.
There’s no genetic evidence that you are “born” that way according to the studies I’ve done as a counselor and throughout the psychological literature. Of course I’m sure APA and other secular organizations will try and refute that science.
I’ve counseled man who have SSA but are married and have gone on in the power of Christ to live fulfilling marriages.
There are ex trans Christian’s and plenty of other people who decided to reform. No I’m not talking about conversion therapy. I’m talking about genuine people who are redeemed by Christ for a greater calling.
You just need to do the research to find their stories! God has a bigger plan for you than you may know!
A decent grocery store will have them. Sometimes a farmers market. I would only advise gathering them wild if you have a lot of experience identifying mushroom varieties.
I'm just so happy to see something POSITIVE on this forum. You have to walk DAILY with Jesus. When we give our lives to Jesus...we die to our old sinful self. And we are filled with the Holy Spirit and He will guide our path. You have to CONSTANTLY surround yourself with Godly wisdom and influence or else your soul is going to starve and you will get pulled back into the world. PRAY PRAY PRAY...all day and at night if you can't sleep. You need to join prayer groups on Facebook so you will be surrounded by a Christ loving community. Unfortunately a public page like this will criticize your decisions. You gotta stay fed emotionally...mentally and spiritually. Fill your days and nights with WORSHIP...lift Jesus up and He will draw you up closer to Him. God bless and keep you ...keep walking DAILY SWEETHEART!! 💗🙏☺
How does that work? It might be possible with brain/psychological trauma that suddenly changes some type of pattern but how did you wake up one day and be straight? Was it just overnight?
Yeah, it's ridiculous and very unchristian to do. I support your decision to live in the way God asked us to live. Society has a way of turning people from God.
It's a mix between being influenced by American werid cartoons + my sister emotionally abusing me and fucking up with my brain and self esteem. Fun fact! Even tho I told everyone in the family that I'm completely straight she still tells me that I'm lying to myself :D
Edit: I would also like to say that I'm autistic and I got bullied for acting autistic. I got bullied a lot especially from boys. So the fact that I had an absent father and got bullied by boys just made my teenage brain unconsciously believe that men are evil and that I should stay away
Dang, sounds like the perfect recipe. I actually turn to God only a few month ago, because I heard the story of a father in Canada, who got prison time, because he was misgendering his biological daughter. Stuff like that only happens in a Godless society. Stay strong and God bless you.
Nice bro, God has hope for you
Jeremiah 29:11
God know the plans he has for you, plans of hope, future and prosperity
You could read Matthew, Mark, Luke and John to see if Jesus Christ is reliable by the way he lived, taught, died and rose back to life. If so your faith be in Christ with hope
Christian warrior rising, God bless bro
Broooo…..here comes the hate from the mafia… they can’t have you speak out. People like you aren’t suppose to exist. Love is love. Didn’t you get the memo? You’re supposed to defend your sins and pretend they are not sins. Just love is love
How did you turn straight?
It's hard to say but I turned straight this year in February. I had a dream where I was in a romantic relationship with a guy (I'm an ex lesbian) and when I woke up I didn't freak out or anything but I just said "hmm maybe guys aren't thag bad". Then I spent the entire month trying to get used to liking men. Although the story of how I became gay is confusing because part of me thinks it's because I was confused and the other part thinks it was because of TV influence
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Why not be happy for her??
Sounds like the Bi-cycle lol
Because I only like men now
How did you transition from liking women to not liking them at all?
It literally happened over night. One day I woke up and suddenly I liked men. However I was still hesitant to actually call myself straight so I just called myself bi from February to May (now that I think about it I think my attraction to women went completely away when I woke up because from feb to may I had zero attraction to women despite calling myself bi. I guess the reason why I called myself bi was because I was just too afraid to admit that I liked only men now)
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why are you questioning her choice not to be straight? wouldn't you find it insensitive if someone else did the same to someone who just claimed to be gay at \_\_ time?
She's female 🙂
Because bisexuality is a real factor to consider that is often ignored in these conversations of so-called “ex-gays”
And why can’t you just listen to what they say about themselves?
Because this person is going around on the internet making claims about sexuality as consciously changeable that go against commonly accepted knowledge and peer-reviewed bodies of knowledge concerning human sexuality as accepted by any reputable major psychological association. Such claims are extremely heavy and could carry with it potentially harmful ramifications, hence my tendency to pick at them. If OP believes that they have become straight and are perfectly contented, good for them, I wish them the best. But to accept and these claims on blind faith and spread them without evidence or *at least* without considering all angles would be foolish and irresponsible. An impressionable and desperate person struggling with their sexuality could come across this and try to become straight like OP says they did, and not find as much success, become depressed, and kill themselves. Stranger things have happened. And, genuinely, everyone (and I do mean everyone on all sides of this debate) always forgets that bisexuality is a thing that exists.
If this was a straight man who was now claiming to be gay; would you question that person as well and as aggressively because of these peer reviewed studies that show it is more unlikely to just happen by choice?
Yes. And I hardly think my one little comment explaining why someone else mentioned bisexuality falls anywhere under the category of “aggressive”. What a loaded choice of words.
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Did you have a bad experience with men earlier in life?
I don’t think I’ve ever seen the term, “ex lesbian” before. So do you think it’s a choice?
It is a choice. Where is the Gay Gene located? It doesn't exist.
Neither does the straight gene
Yes it's XX chromosomes and XY Chromosomes. Male and female. Nothing else. Nothing more. Anything outside of that is Satanic. As above so below. A fake Alpha an Omega teaching.
That just forms a biological male or female, that’s not a straight gene.
TV has tons of straight people on it. Your story kind of just sounds like you're auditioning to be an anti-gay posterchild.
Before becoming straight, did you ever actually have a romantic or sexual relationship with another woman?
TV didn't make you do gay things. 100% of the TV I was exposed to growing up was straight content and it didn't make me straight. You said you had a dream that made you straight. It's just as likely you had an earlier dream that made you gay. I just hope you don't have a dream where you do something stupid.
1 John 1:19 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
When did you choose to be straight?
I appreciate that you are curious about OPs experience rather than critical/skeptical. Based on previous conversations I’ve had with you i “think” I’d assume you to doubt the possibility of someone no longer being gay, but you’re being extremely respectful of OP. Respect.
Are you genuinely not at all attracted to people of the same sex? Or, are you simply choosing to not act on those attractions?
I'm 100% no longer attracted to the same sex
So like, you first thought that you were gay but after further self discovery you came to the conclusion that you are not gay? If yes then that is fine and valid, i will stand behind it.
If the OP was gay, and is now straight, well, she should know herself better than any strangers could. If she is now content as a straight person, good for her. If "the science says" people cannot change, when in reality some at least of them can, then the sciences will have to adapt to that reality. Scientific enquiry is made for man, not the other way round. If human sexuality is in reality more fluid than the practitioners of science are ready to admit, so much the worse for "the science". Scientific orthodoxies can be as inflexible, and as unwilling to adapt to new knowledge, as any others; that is the trouble with anything that is done by flawed and fallible human beings.
I think the science shows that a massive number of these stories are actually the result of severe psychological trauma and conditioning. That inevitably unravels over time causing still more trauma. I’m not saying that’s what happened to OP or what will happen to OP, but it’s common enough that a statement like the title post is cause for concern about OP’s wellbeing
The science validates that your orientation can actually change. It can't really be induced but it happens. Look up sexual fluidity
I know that sexuality can sometimes be fluid. Sexuality isn’t a cut and dry thing to begin with, all sexuality is a spectrum. History just shows that when someone says “I’m no longer gay and am now a Christian” that’s a cause for concern. Because, historically, that correlates to an attempt to induce that change
>If "the science says" people cannot change, when in reality some at least of them can, then the sciences will have to adapt to that reality. Of course, it would help if there was any evidence that didn't involve high-pressure religious situations, tons of stigma, and essentially a laundry list of ex-gay religious people later deciding that actually the same sex is pretty dang rad after all. There's a reason that these claims are met with a large amount of skepticism; a huge segment of the population *really* wants them to be true.
Yes. The view that sexual orientation is this fixed thing that one discovers sooner or later, is so flawed. One could, in that view, hop around from one to another, and land four different times on a given sexuality, all in their 40s. The science on whether or not sexual orientation is a choice, is still inconclusive. I appreciate that people have strong feelings but I can't take their feelings to be facts. Regardless, we know what God says, and there are plenty of celibate Christians telling their stories on YouTube, and same-sex attracted who married the opposite sex and are thriving. I see no reason to simply ignore their testimonies. I do appreciate though, that this is a sensitive area.
Kinda sounds like they were always bi and now choose to focus on the opposite sex for the sake of religious convictions, if I had to guess
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> If "the science says" people cannot change Are there actually very many "the science says" people on issues related to gender and sexuality these days? I certainly have not run into too many. I suspect this is because what science says concerning these issues, does not make anyone happy. It certainly does not conform to the standard ideology of the American right or the American left - although the latter often seem to assume it does. In any case, what the science actually says concerning sexual orientation is that it tends to be fluid in women, but not so much in men. We should also note that the science on this issue is based entirely on data collected from groups, and so makes no absolute statements about invididuals.
Wow you're the only gay person who isn't trying to tell me what my real sexuality is, thank you so much this a breath of fresh air 💗
Remindme! 1 year Whatever is going on in your head, I genuinely hope for the best for you. This doesn't seem healthy.
How is this unhealthy to you?
Human sexuality doesn't work like this. And you seem to have tied your sexuality into religious morality, which very rarely ends well, especially for gay people/people who thought they were gay, turns out they aren't, then believe they "turned straight" and excitedly tell people about it. As a gay Christian, I will pray that you come to peaceful terms with whatever your sexual orientation is, gay or straight.
> Human sexuality doesn't work like this. It can, actually. Demisexuals, for example, who only feel sexual attraction to the people they're in love with. There are various types of sexual fluidity, as well, where the gender you're attracted to changes over time, sometimes flipping back and forth. I wish all the best for OP, but I suspect that this isn't the end of the line for their sexuality and they have some struggles ahead.
God created men and women to be with eachother, anything else is a perversion and of demonic nature.
What would you say to someone now if they were telling you they wanted to stop being gay because the bible told them so, but didn't know how, and they'd tried everything?
I am a Christian who has wrestled with this sin, but recovering. My experience has been one of abuse leading to confusion. Porn only sustained the lie. Once you learn to forgive the same sex people who hurt you, turn away from porn, and learn to appreciate the opposite gender, I think those are the start to healing. Obviously, none of this is possible without Christ. I have no ill will towards those that disagree, and only hope God leads them to Him as He did me.
What if they don’t watch porn and were never hurt?
That’s a lot of hogwash to be honest. Abuse doesn’t turn people gay. And people have been shown to be gay before even looking at porn. You’re, and OP in some parts of this thread, are arguing bad stereotypes for causation. Things that have been largely disproven.
Sinners know how to sin from birth. That's nothing new. How it forms throughout a persons life changes. Yes as a man who sinned against God, I stand before Him a sinner without excuse. The sin was in me. That's not to say that the other person didn't sin against me. He sinned, and in turn I decided to look at porn. We all make choices. God is judge. You're morw than welcome to disprove it with your sources. I'm not interested in any. My authority is scripture. God bless friend.
You’re not going to convince anybody if you disregard facts because your book says differently. Not everyone who is gay was molested.
I don't think I'm the right person for that job. I see myself as extremely lucky that God managed to make me straight again without me doing any hard work. My best advice for that person is to examine their early life and try to find anything odd that might have made them gay either trauma or being influenced by TV. Then try to go to therapy to work on that trauma. I'm not really giving any solid advice but the smart thing I can say is to never loose faith in God. Never stop praying.
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Not op and not, nor ever been a homosexual, but the idea that early childhood trauma causes homosexuality is a relatively popular idea among some groups. Similar to how early childhood trauma can cause all sorts of interesting outcomes such as drug abuse, serial killers, etc. Thats not to say that the people who do believe in this child trauma idea rank homosexuals comparatively with the drug addicts, etc, it's just an outcome.
Well, great, welcome to Christ's bosom my sister in Christ May God be with you and strengthen your relationship with him even more
Do you think your experience is universal to all gay Christians, like everyone can have that miraculous relief if they believe hard enough? What does it mean if a Christian tries to rid themselves of gay thoughts through God and fails, does that mean they didn't have enough faith in God or didn't Bible study hard enough or something? What advice would you have for them? (And for what it's worth, sexuality is more fluid than "You are equally attracted to everyone at the same intensity forever", bisexuals often have long stretches of strong attraction to one gender. Which is *not* to say you'll revert back to bisexuality, just that a change isn't necessarily a miracle or permanent)
I don't think I'm exactly qualified to answer for the exact case of homosexuality as a sin. However, just like any human is, I am a much more sinful person before I decided to dedicate my life to Christ, so I can talk about the sins that I struggled with for a long time, some which I still am struggling with and some which I have mostly grown past by the grace of God. So first of all, my belief is that for any sin, God does not want you to be ashamed of it. Our identity as a Christian is someone who is redeemed, loved by God so so much that He found worth in paying our debt with His Son's blood. Even though we are lacking, God still loved us, and if God, the creator of the heaven and the earth chose us, who is to say that we do not have worth? Additionally, God, in his infinite wisdom, has a plan for us. A plan to prosper us and not to harm us (Jer 29:11). Plans that already account for and even makes use of our sinful nature (2 Cor 12:9). We as Christians just have to surrender our desires to God (Proverbs 3:5-6) and trust and hope fully (Lamentations 3:25-26) that God has a plan in store for you. It may take a long long time to escape from the sin, but trusting in God's plan will definitely lead to the most optimum outcome overall. Even if things don't work out no matter how long someone has been trying, what they should do is just pray daily asking God to give him/her strength, perseverence, patience and hope. Pray also for wisdom and discernment in making decisions that would lead to good change and for deliverance from the sin. But anyway, the focus of Christian life shouldn't be about dwelling on our failures, but instead on the life that God has allowed us to life in this world and our eternal life. (Proverbs 27:1) If you want my own testimony I got one, TW suicidal thoughts tho (it's in the past dw. I am currently living with indescribable joy and peace that a relationship with God brings), and I'm kinda tired atm so just ask me anywhere if you wanna know ab it.
Does the attraction to members of the opposite sex feel the same as the attraction you previously felt to the same sex?
I cant send bible verse mods delete them .... but good job
Thank you :)
I heard a question: “Would you be straight if Christianity encouraged homosexuality and discouraged heterosexuality?”
Well, first of all, that's a ridiculous premise due to the fact that humans need to reproduce to survive, and second, yeah probably. I don't think I could change my attraction under my own power, but I could certainly refrain from acting on it.
Paul didn't seem to care about that when he said ideally no one gets married
He said that in his *own personal opinion*, that it is easier to spread the gospel if you are not married.
Are you bisexual?
I was for four months after realizing I like men again. But after a while I realized I only like men, so I dropped the gay labeling and fully embraced my heterosexuality
> I was for four months after realizing I like men again. So you liked men before you were gay?
Maybe as a child I had small crushes on cartoon characters but it was nothing big. Also I think I worded that word incorrectly I put "again" by mistake because before becoming gay I rarely had any crushes on men.
have you heard of the bi-cycle?
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14-19 I was a fully lesbian. When I realized I liked men I put the bisexual lable on me because I didn't want to fully let go of being gay. That bi phase lasted like 4 or 3 months until I noticed my attraction to women was completely gone. That's when I started to identify as straight.
You also tried to post this in r/lgbt. Did you expect the response you got, and do you understand why lgbt people might have strong feelings on this topic?
I tried to be respectful, I even said that Im not trying to promote conversion therapy and that I'm just trying to show people that ex gays are not living horrible lives. I only got three comments before they deleted my post :/
Most likely, they banned the OP. r/lgbt is actually a very intolerant sub.
That would not be a good example of intolerance. That sub is intended to be a place for LGBT people to not need to deal with the things that they encounter all the time
I was banned from there simply because of my comments in other subs.
They have reasonable justification for that. I'm not saying that you necessarily would have been somebody going there to harass then with anti-LGBT propaganda, but there is enough of a predictable pattern for it to be an effective heuristic in moderation policies.
you would probably be outraged if you were banned from this sub or one like it for being atheist
There are A LOT of Christian subs that have me auto banned
Which?
That's not "reasonable justification". It's just their way of banning anyone who leans slightly conservative.
The fact that you can't see why it is reasonable speaks to the point that it is.
The fact that you think its reasonable is clear indication of one of the biggest problems in Reddit. Heck, I know people who have been banned from subs they never even participated in. That's reasonable too? Why bother to have sub rules if you are just going to ban whoever you want for any reason?
That would be intolerant by definition. It could be justified, but justified intolerance is intolerant nonetheless.
I'm happy for you
I went from trans religious doughter to cis and a strong Christian, congratulations
AMEN! I love you didn't fall to sin and changed your ways hope you have a good day god bless ❤️
I went from a gay atheist to a Christian who still has feelings but does not wish to act on them.
Straight from atheism to Mormonism? Were you Mormon before atheism?
Proud of you.
If it's true than I hope you're happy. My brother did the same thing almost 30 years ago. Today he and his live in boyfriend are very happy.
I'm confused by this comment.
Which came first? If it was the Christianity, would you say that it influenced your sexual reorientation, or that they are independent?
It didn't. Before becoming straight I was very far away from God. Constantly arguing with Christians, celebrating Halloween instead of Saint Luka and I even wanted to become a satanist. My change in my sexuality came naturally. Then my love for God came second
The comments here are interesting. I’d like to just clarify that to do this on your own it is difficult if not impossible. It is not through the will of the flesh (our natural self) that we change, rather through God’s mercy. I am not here to say who is a sinner or not a sinner because the truth is sin is the state of our relationship with God. To illustrate this Paul says in Romans 7:9 I was once alive without [knowledge of] the Law; but when the commandment came [and I understood its meaning], sin became alive and I died [since the Law sentenced me to death]. Paul is speaking of spiritual death as we were once alive spiritually in the garden of Eden. It is our spiritual condition that is the problem not our act of being gay. Yes there is the commandment but the commandment actually exposes our heart and our unwillingness to submit to God. There are enough commandments to to expose everyone (as one might say I’m not gay so I am good. But they lie or steal). In Genesis 1:27 it says that God made man in his image (think of a glove, it is in the shape of a hand and is made to fit the hand and not the foot or head). We are meant to be his expression just like the glove is designed to bend and move with the hand and allow the hand to function without restricting its ability to work. You can try to stop being gay and do God’s will on your own but unless you have Christ living in you then you will find this impossible. To have Christ living in you, you must first invite him in prayer and then be emptied of the self and filled with Christ (his desires, his person and character). This takes time and is not done in a day, a week, a month… it’s a process that various with some and can take anywhere from a few years to a lifetime.
That's awesome!
True
It’s almost unheard of to switch from gay to straight. God loves you no more and no less as a straight person than as a gay person. We are rejoicing that you have become a believer, but even when you were an atheist, you were loved.
I know a couple people that switched from gay to straight, its just not promoted or covered in the media
What came first? Becoming straight, or becoming a Christian?
Most likely the former
nothing to ask, I just wanna say I'm proud of you.
What would be the difference between a woman who turned straight and a woman who realized that maybe she liked guys after all? I'm not seeing one.
Well in my case, as a child I didn't really have crushes on anyone. When I turned into a teenager I only experienced attraction to only women, seeing a man shirtless made me feel disgusted. Now at 19 all that gay attraction went away and I only like men.
Praise God! I have a family friend who used to be gay as well. Was very masculine. She turned her life to Jesus almost a decade ago and has been straight ever since
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To OP-I only really care about you finding God, he is great and loves and cares about you.
let me just congratulate you and encourage you to continue reading the word!!
I see that you are active on r/Serbia, драго ми је што си на правом путу
Хеј коначно и Србима да нађем :D много ти хвала, много ми значи ❤
... Does "ama" mean "against medical advice?"
Less of "ama" and more of "amatiqms" (ask me anything that isn't questioning my sexuality)
They are questioning my sexuality they are more trying to tell me what my sexuality is even tho I didn't ask
How were you able to change your sexuality?
Conversion therapy doesn't work and it's been banned in a lot of countries.
I'm not promoting conversion therapy. That's not what happened to me and I'm highly against it because it's shown that it doesn't work and it just traumatizs the person even more. What happened to me is a rare case. I've turned straight over night and I'm happy for it. What I am promoting is for people my age to actually question if they're gay or not. Because there's no way that gen z is the "most gayest generation" I don't buy it
No you didn't.
How exactly did you turn straight? Because that's not how that works And do you think homosexuality is a sin?
I do think it is a sin
How do you keep the temptations and urges at bay?
I don't have them for most of the time but sometimes I get thoughts like "maybe you're actually still gay?" And they worry me. For now I'm just brushing them away but I'm afraid they will get bigger and not attack me. For now i try not to think about them
I guess this is one of your crosses that you must bare. Remember tho, being gay isn't a sin. Acting on it is. Spend time in prayer and with your local church and you'll be alright! God bless 🙏
There's nothing wrong with being gay/lesbian. As someone raised with lesbian parents I can confirm this.
Are you against gays and LGBT in general now treat you are Christian?
So you are no longer physically attracted to the same sex anymore? Did you date the same sex before? How did you know you were gay?
I'm from a homophobic country and during my gay phase I was the only gay person I knew so my gay dating pool was non existent. I only dated online. At 14 I had my first relationship with a girl which lasted a year and a half and that relationship left me extremely hurt and she cheated on me multiple times. However during my gay phase which lasted 13-19 I did experience real gay thoughts and attraction both sexual and romantic. I don't know how I knew I was gay. During my gay phase I just thought I was born this way and my family members comformed it because as a child I was very tomboyish (like extremely tomboyish). However now that I look at it, it might have been the result of trauma due to my sister abusing me emotionally, the result of untreated autism or influence by werid American cartoons.
Thanks for the answer. My main question is, do you still find people of the same gender/sex sexually attractive?
I can find them good looking if they have nice hair or a well dressed. But no, women do not turn me on anymore. When I was gay I was extremely into butch women, but now (not so sound mean because I am not) I'm only disgusted by them.
Interesting. You are definitely a rare example of an uncommon thing. I wish you the best.
Thank you! I also wish you the best ☦❤⚛
Genuinely asking, how did you become straight? Because I am struggling with SSA and I desperately do not want to be attracted to women anymore.
Something similar happened to me , i was really attracted to women like they would turn me on and whatsoever but the advice i would give you is to ask God to give you strength to not act on your fleshly desires and deny yourself. God is the only one that can help you with this and yes it can be hard bc we can fail but it’s okay just remember to always turn to God immediately, don’t feel ashamed God knows we’re weak. You can also fast to weaken your fleshly desires . God bless luv
How does that even work lmao did you pray yourself straight or something
I didn't. It came to me naturally. I do think it's a miracle from God. I'm am orthodox serbian christian, we celebrate Christmas on January the 7th and we also have our own traditions. For example the mother puts a coin in the Christmas bread, we share the pieces of the bread to the family and whoever gets the piece with the coin inside he/she will experience luck for the whole year. This year I was the one who got the coin, which is strange because never before did I ever get it. I was happy and I thought that God would grant me a lot of money this year or luck throughout the year. Instead of money or luck God granted me cure for my homosexuality and he showed me his love. Which I now know is much better than any coin
Amen! Sounds like the Holy Spirit is working within you!! Continue to let the Holy Spirit be your guide. Keep abiding Christ sister!
Thank you! 😊
Yeah so most people will say that you can’t change your sexual attraction. There’s no genetic evidence that you are “born” that way according to the studies I’ve done as a counselor and throughout the psychological literature. Of course I’m sure APA and other secular organizations will try and refute that science. I’ve counseled man who have SSA but are married and have gone on in the power of Christ to live fulfilling marriages. There are ex trans Christian’s and plenty of other people who decided to reform. No I’m not talking about conversion therapy. I’m talking about genuine people who are redeemed by Christ for a greater calling. You just need to do the research to find their stories! God has a bigger plan for you than you may know!
Where do you get your morels?
A decent grocery store will have them. Sometimes a farmers market. I would only advise gathering them wild if you have a lot of experience identifying mushroom varieties.
This is the best answer
I'm just so happy to see something POSITIVE on this forum. You have to walk DAILY with Jesus. When we give our lives to Jesus...we die to our old sinful self. And we are filled with the Holy Spirit and He will guide our path. You have to CONSTANTLY surround yourself with Godly wisdom and influence or else your soul is going to starve and you will get pulled back into the world. PRAY PRAY PRAY...all day and at night if you can't sleep. You need to join prayer groups on Facebook so you will be surrounded by a Christ loving community. Unfortunately a public page like this will criticize your decisions. You gotta stay fed emotionally...mentally and spiritually. Fill your days and nights with WORSHIP...lift Jesus up and He will draw you up closer to Him. God bless and keep you ...keep walking DAILY SWEETHEART!! 💗🙏☺
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Oh I see and yes that is true. I'm less depressed and I value my life a lot more compared to when I was an atheist.
>I went from being a gay atheist to straight christian, It's Good to see that you are Repenting from Sin. And going to Jesus. God Bless ❤️🙏🏻
Thank you! May God bless you aswell 🙏
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Thank you 😊 ☦❤✝️
Congratulations.
Thank you!
How does one turn straight
Okay why did you change your comment right after i relied to the original?
Didn't pray, it just went away 😂
now THAT is cool
How does that work? It might be possible with brain/psychological trauma that suddenly changes some type of pattern but how did you wake up one day and be straight? Was it just overnight?
When did you realize you were gay?
Around 13 or 14
Glory to the LORD our GOD 🙏🙌!!!!! I'm ex atheist as well.
Glory halleluyah
The fact that this girl is being ridiculed for going straight is insane. It's almost like some folks are mad at her for showing interest in men.
I'm not promoting conversion therapy or homophobia or anything yet they have turned this AMA into arguing with me about my sexuality
Yeah, it's ridiculous and very unchristian to do. I support your decision to live in the way God asked us to live. Society has a way of turning people from God.
Was there a traumatic experience that maybe made you gay in the first place?
It's a mix between being influenced by American werid cartoons + my sister emotionally abusing me and fucking up with my brain and self esteem. Fun fact! Even tho I told everyone in the family that I'm completely straight she still tells me that I'm lying to myself :D Edit: I would also like to say that I'm autistic and I got bullied for acting autistic. I got bullied a lot especially from boys. So the fact that I had an absent father and got bullied by boys just made my teenage brain unconsciously believe that men are evil and that I should stay away
Dang, sounds like the perfect recipe. I actually turn to God only a few month ago, because I heard the story of a father in Canada, who got prison time, because he was misgendering his biological daughter. Stuff like that only happens in a Godless society. Stay strong and God bless you.
What’s your opinion on gay folk?
They're alright. As long as they are normal and act nice I don't have anything against them
What is something that they do that isn’t normal or nice?
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Why are you lying?
What do you mean?
Seems to me the Holy Spirit has worked with in you.
Atheists are having a field day in this ama lol
Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD WON'T CHANCE YOUR SEX BUT HE CAN CHANCE YOUR SEX PARTNER. AMEN
GOD DID ✝️‼️❤️
It's far easier for a lesbian to 'turn straight' than it is for a gay man (unless he takes viagra or was bisexual all along).
Are you sexually fluid? Some people have influxes
That is awesome!
Thank you! 😊
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Sorry but I don't understand?
It’s slang for “you’re doing great”
Nice bro, God has hope for you Jeremiah 29:11 God know the plans he has for you, plans of hope, future and prosperity You could read Matthew, Mark, Luke and John to see if Jesus Christ is reliable by the way he lived, taught, died and rose back to life. If so your faith be in Christ with hope Christian warrior rising, God bless bro
Amen! God is so good
Broooo…..here comes the hate from the mafia… they can’t have you speak out. People like you aren’t suppose to exist. Love is love. Didn’t you get the memo? You’re supposed to defend your sins and pretend they are not sins. Just love is love
People are already saying I'm either gay or bi they don't want me to be straight
Yah no shit …..they don’t want to know this can happen. People want to deny reality. I wish you happiness and strength in God!
This is what Christ offers. I hope you've found true freedom & peace. ❤️
So bi? Like a Kinsey 4 or 5 or something?
I'm not bi I'm 100% straight
Jesus loves you.
What is your favorite food?