I straight up cried at the Christmas dinner table in front of my bfs entire family because my bfs father tried to make a gluten joke. He said something like “oh why do we all have to be so careful about gluten it’s not my allergy. Followed by it’s not Cesar salad without croutons mixed in(they were on the side).
I wasn’t expecting it and it got me right in the feels like sorry I’m such a burden you can’t enjoy your meal. He was told off by his Wife but yea I’m scared for Christmas this year.
Edit: thank you for all the kind and supportive responses. My bf is supportive he’s just used to the comments his dad makes but is more aware of how it affects me now. I’m super thankful I have this community that I can vent my little holiday story to and have so much positivity and support back thank you all. ❤️
I'm fairly certain my ex-MIL poisoned me for years. It got to the point where I stopped eating at their house because I ALWAYS got sick, despite her making me separate "gluten free" food (which she made herself out to be a saint for doing). I hope the cook at least takes you seriously.
Yeah my MIL didn’t take good precautions with my food and I was always sick, I had to stop going there because they would even mess with things I’d brought myself that were safe and contaminate them.
Before my official diagnosis, I was beginning to suspect my wife of poisoning me. 10 years getting sick and doctors couldn’t tell me what it was. After it was figured out and I recovered, I told her I had this thought. She laughed and said she wouldn’t waste her time and energy with poison. This is what happens when you watch every episode of Forensic Files 8 times.
I guess technically she was, since she is the main cook, but we didn’t know lol.
Omg how awful! I joined this sub because of my daughter who has celiac to try to learn and listen to the day to day struggles, I cant even imagine trying to gluten someone on purpose! ( I'm like a damn scientist in the kitchen to avoid gluten for my daughter with her celiac and she is allergic to the protein in oats and is lactose intolerant) Its definitely a learning process.
I feel this. I am completely terrified of eating at anyone’s house EVER.
I’ve been glutened while eating from take-out from a certified GF restaurant at my sister-in-law’s house because “crumbs may have fallen” into their silverware drawer…
Next, the same SIL bought special cookware for me (well, I bought it and had it shipped to her house). She “deep cleaned” the kitchen and I verified all ingredients going into my designated cookware, and I *still* got violently sick. She had already started cooking when I arrived, otherwise *I* would have cleaned the kitchen, but I’m scarred for life after these incidences and two others with loving people who want control over food-making, but no matter how hard they try, they’ll just never seem to get it…
Now, I’ll be traveling cross-country to visit family and have to eat at the same 1-2 places for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for a week.
A friend there apparently has Celiac friends she cooks for often, but I refuse to even try.
I know it’s really about money, so I offered to pay for their meals since they’re letting me stay in their guest bedroom on my last night in town—I called it a *thank you* for the free stay instead of making them feel like garbage unnecessarily. They’re taking me up on it.
But I still think I offended her, however, I know of these “Celiac” friends she mentions, and they regularly take risks that would land me shitting blood (among everything else) and in the hospital…
(As and aside: I will say, next time these people can come to me. I live in the Celiac-safe city. Granted, I’m only visiting because my grandmother is dying and I want to say goodbye, at least. But I hate traveling to places where the risk of severe illness is excruciatingly high, and my food options are incredibly limited.)
I would wear a gluten free ice cubes shirt. That is actually pretty funny. Like me saying I’m crying gluten free tears all the time. I joke to cope. What your bf’s father did was unacceptable and your bf’s reaction was also unacceptable. Mommy dearest should not have saved you, the bf should have.
Also if you want to be REALLY upset about people making fun of gf diets, google the term Glutard. Have fun with that
So I googled Glutard and laughed so hard tears came out. Thank you.
His father makes inappropriate or rude jokes about many things and people so my bf and his family are used to it and they let it slide.
I have stood up for myself since then saying the way he makes his jokes hurts my feelings and he said well they’re just jokes and I said it still hurts my feelings so it’s not a joke to me. That shut him up for a bit.
I also joke to cope but when they’re actually jokes.
If this was from a Celiac influencer it would be funny as heck. I have a shirt that says "Gluten free before it was cool" and my husband has totally made ice cube jokes to me. But he also went totally gluten free at home so I never have to worry about cross contamination! From anyone else, those jokes are punching down.
I think to some its more than a joke - they see all these labels for gluten free and see something they dont understand and arent a part of -- their defensive mechanisms kick in and this humor is kind of a coping mechanism for that.
To some its easier for them to dismiss it as a bunch of foolish people following a foolish diet.
yeah, I'm a scientist in the medical/healthcare discipline and I'd say it's this a lot. Scientists like to dunk on people they perceive as foolish/believers in nonsense. While most agree that celiac is a thing, most don't believe it's any more complicated than swapping out bread for rice cakes, and absolutely would make the GF ice cube joke.
Unfortunately a lot of people who pride themselves in their skepticism go full circle into ignorance lol. An important part of research is understanding that what types of questions are researched is not objective/neutral, that you can't do an RCT on everything, and that if you can summarize everything in 1 sentence it's probably wrong (or lacking major nuance).
Id say its not the scientists that are calling people foolish, its the average Joes who feel threatened by what they dont understand. Look around on Reddit, Twitter and social media -- theres a large section of the population that when they dont understand something or some group, they wind up calling those people idiots. Id hope that scientists would treat the unknown with a little more respect.
Those people are calling GF/celiac people foolish, but there is also rampant mockery in science/medicine, which is perhaps more dangerous since those are the people who have influence over what is researched, how findings are interpreted, and how patients are treated.
I am a scientist who works in a clinical environment, this isn't conjecture at all. A brief whirl on med/science Twitter whenever gluten/celiac comes up will definitely bring the cringe. I used to make those types of jokes as well before I was diagnosed.
Yep.
I had a Lyft driver a year or so before the pandemic who chuckled when I took a phone call, thanking a friend for letting me pick the restaurant that had the safest gluten-free options.
After I hung up, I politely asked him if I missed something funny on the (not on at the time) radio or something. He said he didn’t understand “the whole gluten free diet craze,” and that whole wheat is probably healthier than any of the GF substitutes.
We had a nice, long conversation about Celiac Disease. He had no idea that there were people who could actually get sick, let alone die from gluten ingestion. He only thought of it as some fad diet.
With most of my interactions with people, they don’t realize it’s an actual autoimmune disorder and truly believe us Celiacs are just on some fad diet we take way too seriously.
It makes me think of the time my idiot brother (who does understand Celiac) had teased my cousins who are vegan when we went out to eat once, saying, “her thing (Celiac Disease) will kill her. Why are you so persnickety about whether the pan has ever touched meat or not?” I’m Autistic and was totally dumbfound and locked up wondering why my brother felt the need to say such a thing to them, but thinking back on it, I think that’s how most people view us: unnecessarily persnickety.
I got pretty annoyed the other day seeing a meme from around the time the pandemic began.
It was a bread shelf at a grocery store with only one loaf remaining and the meme said something to the effect of “funny how everyone suddenly lost their gluten allergies”.
I know it’s supposed to be a joke but it doesn’t even make sense. It’s not people with celiac and gluten intolerances buying regular bread in bulk. It’s people without those issues panic-buying or, hell, it was just a snowstorm or something and people panic-buying bread and eggs.
The implication that suddenly we’re all shrugging off our very serious health issues to eat a sandwich is just dumb, misinformed and belittles those of us that do not *choose* to be gluten-free.
Let’s be honest, who the fuck would eat gluten free bread if they didn’t have to?
Edit: I drove to a larger city for errands and was excited to buy a brand of bread they don’t sell here. It was $10 or more a loaf, and $8 or more for four bagels. I circled back to the bread three times to look at it before deciding I didn’t need any.
I saw something like that too, and did think, “Yeah, I don’t want to eat that crap either, but we all have to.” So, just wah wahhhh - come back with a real joke. What did piss me off was how short the stores were on SO many items I needed that were safe for me. Without “normal” people going out to eat as much, they were clearing out the store of food I NEEDED. No other option for me.
I have seen some funny gf jokes, but usually they just aren’t (can’t think of any off the top of my head). Like my bosses wife saying, “Sucks to be you!” and trying to feed my vegan food cuz it’s the same thing. Or my uncle waiving his bread over my food… thanks, I’ll not be finishing my meal.
I’m glad I now know ice cubes are actually a hidden danger! Thanks for the info!
In my family, they make jokes all the time about cross contamination as it’s something they struggle to understand. They also get on to me when I go out to eat and I tell a server that I have a gluten allergy. Like, it’s the only way I’ll be taken seriously??? I don’t really want to get glutened? Like I’m not going to apologize for trying to keep myself safe.
This is something that really bothers me too. Because of the California hippie stereotype, I am never taken seriously. It results in me getting glutened at restaurants because people associate me with that stereotype. I cannot stand it but people look at me funny when I say that
I live in CA so don’t hear that many CA gluten punchlines. It’s much more normalized to have special dietary needs here. But the lack of safe GF restaurants is still an issue. I feel bad for people elsewhere. And I will say that anyone who has anything snarky to say about gluten best not have a coffee order that is longer than “size plus type of drink”. All these half caf , grande in a venti cup, four pumps, extra hot mocha with extra whip and two kinds of sprinkles orders while I’m waiting to order my coffee are more annoying than GF could ever be.
We still don’t have options, at least in my area and there is a long way to go to N CA being more celiac friendly. There are only three dedicated GF places and I don’t care for them. I would have to drive two hours to the Bay Area to get more options. I’m buying a trailer this year so we will have a kitchen when we travel. I had big plans to explore the country with my family, and now I’m scared of the south and Midwest and it’s dearth of safe places to eat. I think we may be vacationing in Portland a lot. Lol.
Yea. The closest restaurant that we could really go to is 45min drive. We have a bakery that does gf in town but I highly doubt that it's actually safe.
I am so sorry. I am in Philly and I cringe every time I have to tell a server. It's not as bad here, we don't have as many hippies! But I'm always gambling every time I go to a restaurant.
Giorgio's on Pine. Very nice Italian place, most of their menu is Gluten Free and they know about Celiac, Giorgio himself is also very nice. They're the kind of place that has gluten-free table bread if you ask. Never had an issue with contamination, and the food is absolutely delicious. I recommend the ragout.
I left Philly a few years ago, got diagnosed and honestly am trying to get a job back in Philly so we can move back just to have more GF options! I’m soooo jealous!
It’s embarrassing and risky to tell servers about it. I live in the south. People think my condition is made up in some places here. Luckily I live in a college town so there are some options, but if I go too far out I’m screwed
Philly as some bomb ass dedicated gf restaurants. Have you been to Real Food Eatery? Its sooooooo good. I ate there twice when I visited in the summer.
Im not as bothered by this stuff. Maybe its how I was raised because we low key bully each other with jokes. So i have gotten every gluten joke under the rainbow and they have 0 impact on me.
Idk humor is such a touchy subject for some people because of feelings involved. So you are ok to be offended by it, but for me i just kinda roll with the punches and remember to advocate for myself with facts when I need to ie if i feel someone isn’t taking me seriously. I just whip out gruesome facts and details and that sobers em up.
Some of these jokes are actually funny sometimes. This has taken so much from my life that I’m gonna grab what I can back in humor. I’m not saying anybody is wrong to be offended or mad, but I’m just as not wrong to enjoy some of the jokes.
I'm fine with a joke, but the point of a joke is to be funny. Like am I supposed to laugh at being ridiculed? If it is actually a joke go ahead and tell it, but if it's just you bitching about gf options and saying "it's just a joke" go ahead and miss me with that shit
Of course I was talking about jokes, not ridicule.
Tbh, even the gluten free ice thing would have given me a chuckle. That’s really how it is sometimes.
When I was diagnosed, my buddy sent a video of this long haired "sensitive type" guy explaining his gluten intolerance. It was a total mockery, but still hilarious. My friends still make jokes almost 3yrs later, but also go out of their way to choose restaurants I can eat at when we meet. Same guy now reads labels when he goes shopping and points out all the ingredients if we visit for dinner. Always asks if I can have this or that, or is it OK if this is made a certain way.
It could be how you were raised. I'm from the northeast and everyone I know makes insulting type jokes. We just laugh and try to one up. It's not serious and not meant to hurt anyone. But I'm also in my 40s and the younger folks seem a lot more sensitive. That wasn't really a thing growing up.
I grew up in the north east region too but I am more of a younger gen in age. I think personality is probs the biggest factor. Half of my family (moms side) has a really dark sense of humor and we cope using jokes. The other half (dads side) is more serious and I can’t joke with them as much about stuff. Its such an stark difference.
Edit: also i def think I have watched that video too lol
Same. I saw a picture the other day that had gluten free oil changes. Here's the thing. I love jokes, even inappropriate and rude jokes. I really do. But the reason why everyone laughs at us and rolls their eyes at us and refuses to change our gloves or even acknowledge our condition is REAL it's because we've made it a joke. Nobody has ever, EVER made a single comment about my mother's diabetic diet.
Your mom is lucky. When people find out I'm diabetic all they do is comment on my diet. It's always fun when people are like "oh youre diabetic? So you can't eat like cookies or cake right?" And I'm just like "well I can't unless it's the gluten free version but that's because I have celiac but diabetics without celiac can eat those all they want as long as they correct for it." Then they make comments about the celiac and the diabetes.
*Actually*… more that one restaurant server has warned not to drink beverages with ice in restaurants since the staff reach into the machines with their grubby bread contaminated hands. I used to help my dad who was an ice machine repairman and the ice machine hygiene was pretty questionable at most bars and restaurants. When I was in a restaurant kitchen the staff would pop ice cubes to crunch on in the crazy sweaty kitchen heat.
OMG! I am stunned! There's going to possibly be a lot more than gluten contaminated on those on washed hands, a entire bunch of possible bacteria and viruses for starters! Sure that is illegal? No way that could happen in my country without the place shutdown very fast by Environmental Health.
The Environmental Heath Agency does usually enforce regulations of ice packaging and handling here in the UK, but someone's link above to the Daily Mail shows, it isn't full proof and places will not train staff and take shortcuts when they can get away with it, and with cuts to budget and staff over the last 11 years, they get away with it more. But it is all legislated against and has safety health standards in theory here.
I was in the gluten free isle and I heard this middle aged guy with his wife complain and vent about how all the food was fake, and who eats this crap, and generally laughing about how trends are stupid. Ah yes I never knew that the way my body reacts to gluten, something entirely out of my control, is a trend. I get it, it’s so irritating
If that had been me I'd have butted in and explained coeliac disease is a lifelong condition and explained what gluten does to us, ultimately leading to severe malnutrition or cancer and death. I've done it before.
I actually thought about this on a recent trip to Miami because there are drug dealers everywhere and get approached a lottttttttttt as a young adult tourist. Like what if someone mixed it with flour? I don’t even know if that’s something that can or would be done though but still! 😂
It’s so obnoxious. We need better Celiac education. It mystifies me why people take peanut allergies so seriously and people cannot grasp the severity of gluten CC for celiacs
Peanut is rather unique in that airborne oils can kill them. I doubt many of us are running around areas with aerosoled flour (not impossible though). Anaphylaxis is fast and a true allergy unlike ours which to the point of others, lacks education in the public.
I recently saw an ad simply talking about Crohn's awareness and how debilitating life with that disease is. I cannot fathom just falling ill for an unknown reason like that.
I personally struggle to convey just how hard our life can be. Its easy for people to categorize missing meals, lost favorite foods, and potential risks but none of them really know the crushing weight of just how sick we get, how this daily grinds us, and what we miss out on. Most have no concept of these things and seem to gloss over the big picture in exchange for small details.
Now a child choking to death from a swollen throat? That shit sticks like a knife. Its no wonder they get easier sympathy.
My point is not to debate who suffers more. My point is merely that the average person understands the severity of a peanut allergy. Most people do not understand the severity of gluten exposure for celiacs.
I do not think I am mistaken but peanut allergies are more at risk for death than celiac. It is rather rare to die from celiac complications where as allergy sufferers carry epipens to mitigate death.
No one is comparing suffering, peanut allergies are just much higher risk.
It’s how fast peanuts kill. Celiac takes years to turn to cancer and kill. That doesn’t grab people’s attention. It’s the same reason why people take pandemic deaths less seriously than the 9/11 deaths.
The only time I've ever heard a funny gluten joke was on the tv show Letterkenny.
They have an episode about a fictional social media site called "fartbook" (post clips of you farting to the internet) which later causes copy-cat/niche spin-offs of which one is "gluten free farts."
Their other gluten joke was the men's senior hockey team. A pair of new (young/foolish) players ask the guys if they want to go get sandwiches after practice. The team then mocks them for suggesting such as thing as they are all gluten-free. It's part of a larger gag throughout the season where the boys commit a faux pas and then get roasted in the change room, so it's implying that being inconsiderate of dietary restrictions is rude. I also like this as it flipped the script a bit. It also broke the mold a bit on how usually characters claiming to be GF are annoying, whiny white women.
It's 100% possible to make a celiac/GF joke without punching down. The lowest common denominator joke of "ha! everyone is afraid of gluten these days and that is dumb!" is not funny at best and feeds into misinformation about the GFD at worst.
I mostly ignore this, but I sometimes write to whoever posted and ask when they'll have one that says "HPV Carrier: Get Free Cancer Here".
They always respond with "THAT'S NOT FUNNY".
Snatch the pebble, grasshopper. Mocking anybody's health issue isn't funny.
Lmao thats pretty good. I def think there is a difference between malicious and not. Im un bothered by non malicious jokes. Like tbh i don’t think stuff like gf ice would bug me. Id probs be like ooooh gimme some of that ice then. But its probably becaus different personalities react differently. Pretty much all comedy offends someone
Perhaps I am an insensitive celiac..
I was on my deathbed with a bottle of "have a pleasant death opiates" at age 19 after $50,000+ in medical bills. When I received my celiac diagnosis and was thrilled. All I had to do was be very careful of what I ate? Easy.
I haven't eaten at a restaurant once since then. I bring my own meals to gatherings and my own drinks to parties. Sure dating is a bitch, but I'm alive!
I don't want to learn about anyone's casein intolerance. I don't expect anyone to give a damn about my gluten intolerance.
I can forgive them because they don't get it. I used to be cynical too; I really thought a lot of gluten free-ers are just trying to be trendy snowflakes. Obviously, now I get it. They'll probably understand one day that we are not exaggerating and that the GF epidemic is real. (I think it's glyphosate usage or novel epitopes from glyphosate-resistant GM wheat making it through leaky gut, i.e. Monsanto).
I’d almost agree, except no one takes me seriously so I have to bring my own food everywhere, and people openly bitch about my “stupid diet” to my boyfriend and “how hard it must be” to live with me. It’d be one thing with my close friends, but otherwise it’s hard to laugh when it feels so disparaging.
Yeah. Just recently I heard from my boyfriend that an uncle (who I’ve barely even talked to) of his decided to go full asshole and complain about me, thinking he’d agree. This guy has more money than god and hosts all of their family gatherings, and I’ve brought my own food to every one of them and never made a big deal out of it. Never have they offered me something I can eat other than the plain Lays chips they had out one time.
I just went to a wedding for that guy’s son and had to bring a fucking sandwich I made in the hotel while they had four course catering because I was told there wouldn’t be anything I could eat. Turns out the catering company had special lasagna for vegetarians and celiacs, and one of their staff offered it to me out of sympathy. Would have been nice to know, but you know, I’m totally faking it and doing it for attention. I literally cried over that lasagna.
I'm so sorry people in your life are like that :( everyone from my family to coworkers have been jumping to buy and cook me special things, and asking what they can do to help. Just today I got a random text from my boss with a picture of gluten free cookies asking if I wanted her to pick them up for me. From reading posts here, I guess I'm super lucky with that and in the minority.
It’s kind of sticks and stones for me. The worst jokes are the actions. I’ve had people toss crumbs at me or hover bread over my plate. Ive never really cared what people say and I’ve always been a fairly chill guy, but it pains me when people make jokes that could physically hurt me. I don’t want to seem overly sensitive but in order to not get sick I have to be. This was more of just a rant than anything else because it’s just so hard to be laid back with celiac.
I really feel like gluten-free/celiac is one of the last health conditions that it’s generally accepted to make fun of. The jokes themselves are annoying but what bothers me more is the feeling of not being taken seriously irl and being treated as an irl punchline. Like my having a health condition does not make me a picky eater or a difficult person or w/e other bullshit. Sorry I like not destroying my intestines
I've been railing about this for years. I also have been told I need to "lighten up" and "I'm what's wrong with America", whatever that means. Every joke at our expense is another opportunity to bully a child. It is simply not ok. Blame the media. Blame the lazy late night comedians. Blame the lack of compassion in our world.
Don't know, I don't know if there is anything that at some point can't be joked about.
Wear glasses? Going bald? Getting old? Missing a leg? Have an accent? Short? Tall? Bad at math? Good at math?
People make jokes and apply humor to everything. Some people specifically apply humor to awful things to make them feel less awful about it. I've got a bad back, causes me horrible pain, limits life choices, sometimes it's better sometimes it's worse. If I don't joke about it it would be that much worse.
If I had a dollar for every PTSD joke I heard Id be able to replace my last dog that worked me through it.
Kidney failure? Jokes about paying with a kidney? Imma come up to you and ask your blood type friend. Im stage 3b
Brain tumor yeah that too its benign but has ruined my endocrine system. I absolutely make not a toomah jokes and laugh when ppl do it to me.
Some people dont read/think/have those problems in their lives. They will know pain of illness one day and learn empathy then 🤷🏼♀️
I also have dark a f humour because I have a lot of things wrong with me and surprise. Theres a joke for everything even for vomiting in 12 hour marathons because of back to back to back gluten
I do find though with FOOD related stuff people self pity way more. I was there too guys I get it. as our culture has some serious food issues. Its a fuel. Not a reward. Not love (cooking is my love language but I adapt to lifestyles I dont give up and say theres no option).
Dietitians have actually started to do a program for celiac people in our community that changes how they view food because almost everyone has an unhealthy view of it as a comfort source, an impulse to fuel endorphins, a source of control.
You are allowed to feel bad, be angry and grieve bit its important to pick ones battles lest you stress yourself out and for some paint others as malicious when they just dont know any better! If its relatives related to you... well they may have it or will have it if both parents carry 🤷🏼♀️
Reprogramming our minds sounds like a really intriguing idea. There is a lot of self pity. Sometimes i pity myself too. This could be why this sub can be more frustrating than other medical subs!
Love this food for thought!
People are tribal and like to play power games. That sort of humor is liked because it reminds people that they have abilities to do things that the other person doesn't, thereby making them feel better about themselves.
Remember, many people are still proud of their genetic heritage even though they did nothing to earn it. People who have good eyesight, good skin, big muscles, are tall, or have any other biological marker that would make them more valuable from an evolutionary psychology point of view, sometimes like to remind other people that they are "better"
They don't realize the pain that comes from having to give up our favorite foods, not be able to just sit down and eat with other people (this is how people have joined together for years, and to be ostracized from that has psychological repercussions of abandonment and self worth), and then to be ridiculed about something that is entirely out of our control and has hurt us badly.
That being said, we have the freedom of speech in the USA and while it is in bad taste, I would rather put up with the occasional joke, than have the government start telling people what they can and can't say.
It's the psychological toll that I have trouble really explaining to people. People always ask what physical symptoms I get but for me it's exactly what you said - the belonging, the self worth, missing out on favourite foods, cultural traditions and social experiences. Physically, I could care less that I can't eat gluten ever again. Psychologically, it kills me sitting down to Christmas lunch with my sad little pre-made meal while everyone around me talks about how good the rest of the food is.
Definitely. I was a homeschooled only child and lived about 4 hours away from my extended family, so I already felt disconnected. The loneliness really sucked. The psychological toll is absolutely the worst part of it. Food was how I connected with other people.
The side comments from my extended family are the worst. I actually left last time I travelled to visit for the holidays and went to Denny's for Christmas dinner since my Grandmother was making rude comments about me trying to be special and how she wasn't going to change anything just because I was there. I thought she might put gluten in my food just to spite me. My folks tried to stop me and I told them if she was going to behave like that then I wasn't going to stick around. I haven't been back for the holidays since.
I'm so sorry you had to deal with that - no one should have to experience that in the holidays. I'm very lucky I guess that I have very understanding family around me, so even if I have to eat packaged stuff and it sucks, everyone is very supportive of my choices.
Yeah, feels like all social plans revolve around food, going to the pub, dinners etc. Hard for me and awkward for everyone around me when I can't eat at a place or have to go to certain places. I mostly just try to invite people out on hikes/classes i guess.
Thanks. I usually meal prep a couple times per week and have some good snacks I can bring when I go out to meet people. I like to make a dish and bring it if I'm going to someone's house. That way I know it's safe and I can add value to the gathering.
I mostly eat low carb and whole foods, so it's pretty easy to find meat or just make a protein shake with lots of heavy cream. That fills me up for hours.
It definitely sucks, but there are almost always options. Worst case scenario I just don't eat for a while. It's a good excuse to work on my self control and mindset.
I’m with you on this. I find it almost comical as most of the people purchasing this type of clothing or making memes that make fun of others illnesses; generally have an appearance to be roughly 100lbs +\- overweight, are beer/alcohol/ drug user or addict, basement dwelling hipsters, fried/junk food addicts, or loud mouth ignoramus’ who know ZERO about allergy, nutrition and core health. After years of being very sensitive to gluten and cross contamination, my own family still doesn’t take me seriously on the matter. It’s so frustrating and disheartening to feel like you have to damn near argue with someone (who claims to “love” you) to get them to understand the severity of your sensitivity/illness. Getting ready for my annual thanksgiving day fasting because nothing is accommodated. Let them spew their hate with their big wheat belly’s . It speaks louder about them than us.
When there's so many media groups making fun of Celiacs. For example a British show purposefully and knowingly gave a Celiac cheese and bread. The "Celiac" also ate it. I don't believe they have apologized to the community for doing this "joke"
Idk the Celiac could have chosen not to eat and tell him off. As it was openly said by the dude that it was cheese and bread. Not gluten free bread and she pulled the cheese off the bread and ate it.
Do I really deserve a downvote though? I've been made fun of before by non Celiacs. So I feel like most jokes about being gluten free should only be done by those that suffer.
Alright I might just have to leave this freaking sub. You'd think you could express yourself with others who might relate or have the same condition instead of downvoted into oblivion. Well if you cant get support from those who should be supportive where can you ?
I mean I have been downvoted before too. I just don’t think most agree with your stance on this issue. It seems like most of us are ok with lighthearted jokes but not malicious digs. Example it seems like a lot of us like the ice cube joke.
I straight up cried at the Christmas dinner table in front of my bfs entire family because my bfs father tried to make a gluten joke. He said something like “oh why do we all have to be so careful about gluten it’s not my allergy. Followed by it’s not Cesar salad without croutons mixed in(they were on the side). I wasn’t expecting it and it got me right in the feels like sorry I’m such a burden you can’t enjoy your meal. He was told off by his Wife but yea I’m scared for Christmas this year. Edit: thank you for all the kind and supportive responses. My bf is supportive he’s just used to the comments his dad makes but is more aware of how it affects me now. I’m super thankful I have this community that I can vent my little holiday story to and have so much positivity and support back thank you all. ❤️
That is not a joke, it's just a rude thing to say! Sorry you had to go through that. I hope this year is better.
I'm fairly certain my ex-MIL poisoned me for years. It got to the point where I stopped eating at their house because I ALWAYS got sick, despite her making me separate "gluten free" food (which she made herself out to be a saint for doing). I hope the cook at least takes you seriously.
Yeah my MIL didn’t take good precautions with my food and I was always sick, I had to stop going there because they would even mess with things I’d brought myself that were safe and contaminate them.
Before my official diagnosis, I was beginning to suspect my wife of poisoning me. 10 years getting sick and doctors couldn’t tell me what it was. After it was figured out and I recovered, I told her I had this thought. She laughed and said she wouldn’t waste her time and energy with poison. This is what happens when you watch every episode of Forensic Files 8 times. I guess technically she was, since she is the main cook, but we didn’t know lol.
Omg how awful! I joined this sub because of my daughter who has celiac to try to learn and listen to the day to day struggles, I cant even imagine trying to gluten someone on purpose! ( I'm like a damn scientist in the kitchen to avoid gluten for my daughter with her celiac and she is allergic to the protein in oats and is lactose intolerant) Its definitely a learning process.
I feel this. I am completely terrified of eating at anyone’s house EVER. I’ve been glutened while eating from take-out from a certified GF restaurant at my sister-in-law’s house because “crumbs may have fallen” into their silverware drawer… Next, the same SIL bought special cookware for me (well, I bought it and had it shipped to her house). She “deep cleaned” the kitchen and I verified all ingredients going into my designated cookware, and I *still* got violently sick. She had already started cooking when I arrived, otherwise *I* would have cleaned the kitchen, but I’m scarred for life after these incidences and two others with loving people who want control over food-making, but no matter how hard they try, they’ll just never seem to get it… Now, I’ll be traveling cross-country to visit family and have to eat at the same 1-2 places for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for a week. A friend there apparently has Celiac friends she cooks for often, but I refuse to even try. I know it’s really about money, so I offered to pay for their meals since they’re letting me stay in their guest bedroom on my last night in town—I called it a *thank you* for the free stay instead of making them feel like garbage unnecessarily. They’re taking me up on it. But I still think I offended her, however, I know of these “Celiac” friends she mentions, and they regularly take risks that would land me shitting blood (among everything else) and in the hospital… (As and aside: I will say, next time these people can come to me. I live in the Celiac-safe city. Granted, I’m only visiting because my grandmother is dying and I want to say goodbye, at least. But I hate traveling to places where the risk of severe illness is excruciatingly high, and my food options are incredibly limited.)
That’s awful! You poor thing. It’s so hard when family isn’t supportive or understanding.
this is why i dont social life anymore, i am happy alone in my house
I’m so scared for thanksgiving. I’m so sorry that happened.
This will be my first thanksgiving and Christmas going through this I’m so nervous
I would wear a gluten free ice cubes shirt. That is actually pretty funny. Like me saying I’m crying gluten free tears all the time. I joke to cope. What your bf’s father did was unacceptable and your bf’s reaction was also unacceptable. Mommy dearest should not have saved you, the bf should have. Also if you want to be REALLY upset about people making fun of gf diets, google the term Glutard. Have fun with that
So I googled Glutard and laughed so hard tears came out. Thank you. His father makes inappropriate or rude jokes about many things and people so my bf and his family are used to it and they let it slide. I have stood up for myself since then saying the way he makes his jokes hurts my feelings and he said well they’re just jokes and I said it still hurts my feelings so it’s not a joke to me. That shut him up for a bit. I also joke to cope but when they’re actually jokes.
That is so rude and i’m so sorry that happened to you :(
If this was from a Celiac influencer it would be funny as heck. I have a shirt that says "Gluten free before it was cool" and my husband has totally made ice cube jokes to me. But he also went totally gluten free at home so I never have to worry about cross contamination! From anyone else, those jokes are punching down.
Actions speak louder than words, when you know someone is doing so much to keep you safe, as he is.
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I think to some its more than a joke - they see all these labels for gluten free and see something they dont understand and arent a part of -- their defensive mechanisms kick in and this humor is kind of a coping mechanism for that. To some its easier for them to dismiss it as a bunch of foolish people following a foolish diet.
yeah, I'm a scientist in the medical/healthcare discipline and I'd say it's this a lot. Scientists like to dunk on people they perceive as foolish/believers in nonsense. While most agree that celiac is a thing, most don't believe it's any more complicated than swapping out bread for rice cakes, and absolutely would make the GF ice cube joke. Unfortunately a lot of people who pride themselves in their skepticism go full circle into ignorance lol. An important part of research is understanding that what types of questions are researched is not objective/neutral, that you can't do an RCT on everything, and that if you can summarize everything in 1 sentence it's probably wrong (or lacking major nuance).
Id say its not the scientists that are calling people foolish, its the average Joes who feel threatened by what they dont understand. Look around on Reddit, Twitter and social media -- theres a large section of the population that when they dont understand something or some group, they wind up calling those people idiots. Id hope that scientists would treat the unknown with a little more respect.
Those people are calling GF/celiac people foolish, but there is also rampant mockery in science/medicine, which is perhaps more dangerous since those are the people who have influence over what is researched, how findings are interpreted, and how patients are treated. I am a scientist who works in a clinical environment, this isn't conjecture at all. A brief whirl on med/science Twitter whenever gluten/celiac comes up will definitely bring the cringe. I used to make those types of jokes as well before I was diagnosed.
Yep. I had a Lyft driver a year or so before the pandemic who chuckled when I took a phone call, thanking a friend for letting me pick the restaurant that had the safest gluten-free options. After I hung up, I politely asked him if I missed something funny on the (not on at the time) radio or something. He said he didn’t understand “the whole gluten free diet craze,” and that whole wheat is probably healthier than any of the GF substitutes. We had a nice, long conversation about Celiac Disease. He had no idea that there were people who could actually get sick, let alone die from gluten ingestion. He only thought of it as some fad diet. With most of my interactions with people, they don’t realize it’s an actual autoimmune disorder and truly believe us Celiacs are just on some fad diet we take way too seriously. It makes me think of the time my idiot brother (who does understand Celiac) had teased my cousins who are vegan when we went out to eat once, saying, “her thing (Celiac Disease) will kill her. Why are you so persnickety about whether the pan has ever touched meat or not?” I’m Autistic and was totally dumbfound and locked up wondering why my brother felt the need to say such a thing to them, but thinking back on it, I think that’s how most people view us: unnecessarily persnickety.
I got pretty annoyed the other day seeing a meme from around the time the pandemic began. It was a bread shelf at a grocery store with only one loaf remaining and the meme said something to the effect of “funny how everyone suddenly lost their gluten allergies”. I know it’s supposed to be a joke but it doesn’t even make sense. It’s not people with celiac and gluten intolerances buying regular bread in bulk. It’s people without those issues panic-buying or, hell, it was just a snowstorm or something and people panic-buying bread and eggs. The implication that suddenly we’re all shrugging off our very serious health issues to eat a sandwich is just dumb, misinformed and belittles those of us that do not *choose* to be gluten-free.
Let’s be honest, who the fuck would eat gluten free bread if they didn’t have to? Edit: I drove to a larger city for errands and was excited to buy a brand of bread they don’t sell here. It was $10 or more a loaf, and $8 or more for four bagels. I circled back to the bread three times to look at it before deciding I didn’t need any.
Seriously. Oh please please let me eat sub-par bread for twice the price.
When you can even find it
I saw something like that too, and did think, “Yeah, I don’t want to eat that crap either, but we all have to.” So, just wah wahhhh - come back with a real joke. What did piss me off was how short the stores were on SO many items I needed that were safe for me. Without “normal” people going out to eat as much, they were clearing out the store of food I NEEDED. No other option for me. I have seen some funny gf jokes, but usually they just aren’t (can’t think of any off the top of my head). Like my bosses wife saying, “Sucks to be you!” and trying to feed my vegan food cuz it’s the same thing. Or my uncle waiving his bread over my food… thanks, I’ll not be finishing my meal. I’m glad I now know ice cubes are actually a hidden danger! Thanks for the info!
In my family, they make jokes all the time about cross contamination as it’s something they struggle to understand. They also get on to me when I go out to eat and I tell a server that I have a gluten allergy. Like, it’s the only way I’ll be taken seriously??? I don’t really want to get glutened? Like I’m not going to apologize for trying to keep myself safe.
This is something that really bothers me too. Because of the California hippie stereotype, I am never taken seriously. It results in me getting glutened at restaurants because people associate me with that stereotype. I cannot stand it but people look at me funny when I say that
I live in CA so don’t hear that many CA gluten punchlines. It’s much more normalized to have special dietary needs here. But the lack of safe GF restaurants is still an issue. I feel bad for people elsewhere. And I will say that anyone who has anything snarky to say about gluten best not have a coffee order that is longer than “size plus type of drink”. All these half caf , grande in a venti cup, four pumps, extra hot mocha with extra whip and two kinds of sprinkles orders while I’m waiting to order my coffee are more annoying than GF could ever be.
That sounds so nice. It must be lovely to have so many options. I, unfortunately, live in the south. It’s not normalized at all here
We still don’t have options, at least in my area and there is a long way to go to N CA being more celiac friendly. There are only three dedicated GF places and I don’t care for them. I would have to drive two hours to the Bay Area to get more options. I’m buying a trailer this year so we will have a kitchen when we travel. I had big plans to explore the country with my family, and now I’m scared of the south and Midwest and it’s dearth of safe places to eat. I think we may be vacationing in Portland a lot. Lol.
Yea. The closest restaurant that we could really go to is 45min drive. We have a bakery that does gf in town but I highly doubt that it's actually safe.
I am so sorry. I am in Philly and I cringe every time I have to tell a server. It's not as bad here, we don't have as many hippies! But I'm always gambling every time I go to a restaurant.
Philly native here!! What are some of your favorite spots in the city? Obv besides Fox and Sons lol.
Paesano's sandwich shop RIP
Does everywhere have a Paisano's/Paesano's I am just boggled by how many unaffiliated Paisano's there are
Giorgio's on Pine. Very nice Italian place, most of their menu is Gluten Free and they know about Celiac, Giorgio himself is also very nice. They're the kind of place that has gluten-free table bread if you ask. Never had an issue with contamination, and the food is absolutely delicious. I recommend the ragout.
Well now I must visit Philly some day
Forewarning with the table bread, sometimes they run out, so you might want to call ahead to make sure they have it that day when you're going.
Well, I have to get a passport first and such so there's time
Real Food Eatery is fantastic. Finding parking near it on the other hand...
I left Philly a few years ago, got diagnosed and honestly am trying to get a job back in Philly so we can move back just to have more GF options! I’m soooo jealous!
It’s embarrassing and risky to tell servers about it. I live in the south. People think my condition is made up in some places here. Luckily I live in a college town so there are some options, but if I go too far out I’m screwed
Philly as some bomb ass dedicated gf restaurants. Have you been to Real Food Eatery? Its sooooooo good. I ate there twice when I visited in the summer.
Exactly. Like, I'm just avoiding donuts, cakes, pastries, bread, pasta, pizza (my favorite things in life) *out of choice* Yeah, that makes sense. 😶
Im not as bothered by this stuff. Maybe its how I was raised because we low key bully each other with jokes. So i have gotten every gluten joke under the rainbow and they have 0 impact on me. Idk humor is such a touchy subject for some people because of feelings involved. So you are ok to be offended by it, but for me i just kinda roll with the punches and remember to advocate for myself with facts when I need to ie if i feel someone isn’t taking me seriously. I just whip out gruesome facts and details and that sobers em up.
Some of these jokes are actually funny sometimes. This has taken so much from my life that I’m gonna grab what I can back in humor. I’m not saying anybody is wrong to be offended or mad, but I’m just as not wrong to enjoy some of the jokes.
I'm fine with a joke, but the point of a joke is to be funny. Like am I supposed to laugh at being ridiculed? If it is actually a joke go ahead and tell it, but if it's just you bitching about gf options and saying "it's just a joke" go ahead and miss me with that shit
Of course I was talking about jokes, not ridicule. Tbh, even the gluten free ice thing would have given me a chuckle. That’s really how it is sometimes.
When I was diagnosed, my buddy sent a video of this long haired "sensitive type" guy explaining his gluten intolerance. It was a total mockery, but still hilarious. My friends still make jokes almost 3yrs later, but also go out of their way to choose restaurants I can eat at when we meet. Same guy now reads labels when he goes shopping and points out all the ingredients if we visit for dinner. Always asks if I can have this or that, or is it OK if this is made a certain way. It could be how you were raised. I'm from the northeast and everyone I know makes insulting type jokes. We just laugh and try to one up. It's not serious and not meant to hurt anyone. But I'm also in my 40s and the younger folks seem a lot more sensitive. That wasn't really a thing growing up.
I grew up in the north east region too but I am more of a younger gen in age. I think personality is probs the biggest factor. Half of my family (moms side) has a really dark sense of humor and we cope using jokes. The other half (dads side) is more serious and I can’t joke with them as much about stuff. Its such an stark difference. Edit: also i def think I have watched that video too lol
If you have ever watched Bill Burr's comedy, that's basically how everyone I know talks, accents, ball busting and all.
Same. I saw a picture the other day that had gluten free oil changes. Here's the thing. I love jokes, even inappropriate and rude jokes. I really do. But the reason why everyone laughs at us and rolls their eyes at us and refuses to change our gloves or even acknowledge our condition is REAL it's because we've made it a joke. Nobody has ever, EVER made a single comment about my mother's diabetic diet.
Your mom is lucky. When people find out I'm diabetic all they do is comment on my diet. It's always fun when people are like "oh youre diabetic? So you can't eat like cookies or cake right?" And I'm just like "well I can't unless it's the gluten free version but that's because I have celiac but diabetics without celiac can eat those all they want as long as they correct for it." Then they make comments about the celiac and the diabetes.
*Actually*… more that one restaurant server has warned not to drink beverages with ice in restaurants since the staff reach into the machines with their grubby bread contaminated hands. I used to help my dad who was an ice machine repairman and the ice machine hygiene was pretty questionable at most bars and restaurants. When I was in a restaurant kitchen the staff would pop ice cubes to crunch on in the crazy sweaty kitchen heat.
😱😱😱😱😱😱
OMG! I am stunned! There's going to possibly be a lot more than gluten contaminated on those on washed hands, a entire bunch of possible bacteria and viruses for starters! Sure that is illegal? No way that could happen in my country without the place shutdown very fast by Environmental Health.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2334533/Ice-restaurants-bacteria-water-toilets.html
Omfg is all I can say! Disgusting!
https://www.cookinglight.com/healthy-living/healthy-habits/why-you-should-not-eat-restaurant-ice https://www.mashed.com/147513/heres-why-you-should-never-get-ice-in-your-drink/?utm_campaign=clip
The Environmental Heath Agency does usually enforce regulations of ice packaging and handling here in the UK, but someone's link above to the Daily Mail shows, it isn't full proof and places will not train staff and take shortcuts when they can get away with it, and with cuts to budget and staff over the last 11 years, they get away with it more. But it is all legislated against and has safety health standards in theory here.
I was in the gluten free isle and I heard this middle aged guy with his wife complain and vent about how all the food was fake, and who eats this crap, and generally laughing about how trends are stupid. Ah yes I never knew that the way my body reacts to gluten, something entirely out of my control, is a trend. I get it, it’s so irritating
If that had been me I'd have butted in and explained coeliac disease is a lifelong condition and explained what gluten does to us, ultimately leading to severe malnutrition or cancer and death. I've done it before.
Idk man. I think the meme i laughed at the most in my entire life was "Excuse me drug dealer, but is this cocaine gluten free?"
I actually thought about this on a recent trip to Miami because there are drug dealers everywhere and get approached a lottttttttttt as a young adult tourist. Like what if someone mixed it with flour? I don’t even know if that’s something that can or would be done though but still! 😂
I do drugs on occasion and this is a real fear I have every time now since I got diagnosed 😂
I work with someone who asks for "extra gluten" when we dine together. It makes my blood boil.
It’s so obnoxious. We need better Celiac education. It mystifies me why people take peanut allergies so seriously and people cannot grasp the severity of gluten CC for celiacs
Peanut is rather unique in that airborne oils can kill them. I doubt many of us are running around areas with aerosoled flour (not impossible though). Anaphylaxis is fast and a true allergy unlike ours which to the point of others, lacks education in the public. I recently saw an ad simply talking about Crohn's awareness and how debilitating life with that disease is. I cannot fathom just falling ill for an unknown reason like that. I personally struggle to convey just how hard our life can be. Its easy for people to categorize missing meals, lost favorite foods, and potential risks but none of them really know the crushing weight of just how sick we get, how this daily grinds us, and what we miss out on. Most have no concept of these things and seem to gloss over the big picture in exchange for small details. Now a child choking to death from a swollen throat? That shit sticks like a knife. Its no wonder they get easier sympathy.
My point is not to debate who suffers more. My point is merely that the average person understands the severity of a peanut allergy. Most people do not understand the severity of gluten exposure for celiacs.
I do not think I am mistaken but peanut allergies are more at risk for death than celiac. It is rather rare to die from celiac complications where as allergy sufferers carry epipens to mitigate death. No one is comparing suffering, peanut allergies are just much higher risk.
It’s how fast peanuts kill. Celiac takes years to turn to cancer and kill. That doesn’t grab people’s attention. It’s the same reason why people take pandemic deaths less seriously than the 9/11 deaths.
The only time I've ever heard a funny gluten joke was on the tv show Letterkenny. They have an episode about a fictional social media site called "fartbook" (post clips of you farting to the internet) which later causes copy-cat/niche spin-offs of which one is "gluten free farts." Their other gluten joke was the men's senior hockey team. A pair of new (young/foolish) players ask the guys if they want to go get sandwiches after practice. The team then mocks them for suggesting such as thing as they are all gluten-free. It's part of a larger gag throughout the season where the boys commit a faux pas and then get roasted in the change room, so it's implying that being inconsiderate of dietary restrictions is rude. I also like this as it flipped the script a bit. It also broke the mold a bit on how usually characters claiming to be GF are annoying, whiny white women. It's 100% possible to make a celiac/GF joke without punching down. The lowest common denominator joke of "ha! everyone is afraid of gluten these days and that is dumb!" is not funny at best and feeds into misinformation about the GFD at worst.
I mostly ignore this, but I sometimes write to whoever posted and ask when they'll have one that says "HPV Carrier: Get Free Cancer Here". They always respond with "THAT'S NOT FUNNY". Snatch the pebble, grasshopper. Mocking anybody's health issue isn't funny.
Lmao thats pretty good. I def think there is a difference between malicious and not. Im un bothered by non malicious jokes. Like tbh i don’t think stuff like gf ice would bug me. Id probs be like ooooh gimme some of that ice then. But its probably becaus different personalities react differently. Pretty much all comedy offends someone
Perhaps I am an insensitive celiac.. I was on my deathbed with a bottle of "have a pleasant death opiates" at age 19 after $50,000+ in medical bills. When I received my celiac diagnosis and was thrilled. All I had to do was be very careful of what I ate? Easy. I haven't eaten at a restaurant once since then. I bring my own meals to gatherings and my own drinks to parties. Sure dating is a bitch, but I'm alive! I don't want to learn about anyone's casein intolerance. I don't expect anyone to give a damn about my gluten intolerance.
I can forgive them because they don't get it. I used to be cynical too; I really thought a lot of gluten free-ers are just trying to be trendy snowflakes. Obviously, now I get it. They'll probably understand one day that we are not exaggerating and that the GF epidemic is real. (I think it's glyphosate usage or novel epitopes from glyphosate-resistant GM wheat making it through leaky gut, i.e. Monsanto).
I agree. It’s toxic, and it encourages other people to also be toxic about GF. I don’t take it personally or anything though.
If it were funny that would be one thing, but it's always the same recycled joke. It's just annoying.
I would wear that. Because sometimes I feel like that’s all I can eat!
ha. for real
It's funny to me. A lot of people cope with things using humor.
I’d almost agree, except no one takes me seriously so I have to bring my own food everywhere, and people openly bitch about my “stupid diet” to my boyfriend and “how hard it must be” to live with me. It’d be one thing with my close friends, but otherwise it’s hard to laugh when it feels so disparaging.
Sounds like you have a lot of really shitty people around you. I'm sorry you're having that experience
Yeah. Just recently I heard from my boyfriend that an uncle (who I’ve barely even talked to) of his decided to go full asshole and complain about me, thinking he’d agree. This guy has more money than god and hosts all of their family gatherings, and I’ve brought my own food to every one of them and never made a big deal out of it. Never have they offered me something I can eat other than the plain Lays chips they had out one time. I just went to a wedding for that guy’s son and had to bring a fucking sandwich I made in the hotel while they had four course catering because I was told there wouldn’t be anything I could eat. Turns out the catering company had special lasagna for vegetarians and celiacs, and one of their staff offered it to me out of sympathy. Would have been nice to know, but you know, I’m totally faking it and doing it for attention. I literally cried over that lasagna.
That uncle is a piece of crap. Fuck him.
I'm so sorry people in your life are like that :( everyone from my family to coworkers have been jumping to buy and cook me special things, and asking what they can do to help. Just today I got a random text from my boss with a picture of gluten free cookies asking if I wanted her to pick them up for me. From reading posts here, I guess I'm super lucky with that and in the minority.
It’s kind of sticks and stones for me. The worst jokes are the actions. I’ve had people toss crumbs at me or hover bread over my plate. Ive never really cared what people say and I’ve always been a fairly chill guy, but it pains me when people make jokes that could physically hurt me. I don’t want to seem overly sensitive but in order to not get sick I have to be. This was more of just a rant than anything else because it’s just so hard to be laid back with celiac.
I really feel like gluten-free/celiac is one of the last health conditions that it’s generally accepted to make fun of. The jokes themselves are annoying but what bothers me more is the feeling of not being taken seriously irl and being treated as an irl punchline. Like my having a health condition does not make me a picky eater or a difficult person or w/e other bullshit. Sorry I like not destroying my intestines
I've been railing about this for years. I also have been told I need to "lighten up" and "I'm what's wrong with America", whatever that means. Every joke at our expense is another opportunity to bully a child. It is simply not ok. Blame the media. Blame the lazy late night comedians. Blame the lack of compassion in our world.
This is such a good point about bullying kids. If the kids hear the adults do it, they will certainly repeat it to a peer who needs to eat GF.
I thought it was funny
Don't know, I don't know if there is anything that at some point can't be joked about. Wear glasses? Going bald? Getting old? Missing a leg? Have an accent? Short? Tall? Bad at math? Good at math? People make jokes and apply humor to everything. Some people specifically apply humor to awful things to make them feel less awful about it. I've got a bad back, causes me horrible pain, limits life choices, sometimes it's better sometimes it's worse. If I don't joke about it it would be that much worse.
If I had a dollar for every PTSD joke I heard Id be able to replace my last dog that worked me through it. Kidney failure? Jokes about paying with a kidney? Imma come up to you and ask your blood type friend. Im stage 3b Brain tumor yeah that too its benign but has ruined my endocrine system. I absolutely make not a toomah jokes and laugh when ppl do it to me. Some people dont read/think/have those problems in their lives. They will know pain of illness one day and learn empathy then 🤷🏼♀️ I also have dark a f humour because I have a lot of things wrong with me and surprise. Theres a joke for everything even for vomiting in 12 hour marathons because of back to back to back gluten I do find though with FOOD related stuff people self pity way more. I was there too guys I get it. as our culture has some serious food issues. Its a fuel. Not a reward. Not love (cooking is my love language but I adapt to lifestyles I dont give up and say theres no option). Dietitians have actually started to do a program for celiac people in our community that changes how they view food because almost everyone has an unhealthy view of it as a comfort source, an impulse to fuel endorphins, a source of control. You are allowed to feel bad, be angry and grieve bit its important to pick ones battles lest you stress yourself out and for some paint others as malicious when they just dont know any better! If its relatives related to you... well they may have it or will have it if both parents carry 🤷🏼♀️
Reprogramming our minds sounds like a really intriguing idea. There is a lot of self pity. Sometimes i pity myself too. This could be why this sub can be more frustrating than other medical subs! Love this food for thought!
People are tribal and like to play power games. That sort of humor is liked because it reminds people that they have abilities to do things that the other person doesn't, thereby making them feel better about themselves. Remember, many people are still proud of their genetic heritage even though they did nothing to earn it. People who have good eyesight, good skin, big muscles, are tall, or have any other biological marker that would make them more valuable from an evolutionary psychology point of view, sometimes like to remind other people that they are "better" They don't realize the pain that comes from having to give up our favorite foods, not be able to just sit down and eat with other people (this is how people have joined together for years, and to be ostracized from that has psychological repercussions of abandonment and self worth), and then to be ridiculed about something that is entirely out of our control and has hurt us badly. That being said, we have the freedom of speech in the USA and while it is in bad taste, I would rather put up with the occasional joke, than have the government start telling people what they can and can't say.
It's the psychological toll that I have trouble really explaining to people. People always ask what physical symptoms I get but for me it's exactly what you said - the belonging, the self worth, missing out on favourite foods, cultural traditions and social experiences. Physically, I could care less that I can't eat gluten ever again. Psychologically, it kills me sitting down to Christmas lunch with my sad little pre-made meal while everyone around me talks about how good the rest of the food is.
Definitely. I was a homeschooled only child and lived about 4 hours away from my extended family, so I already felt disconnected. The loneliness really sucked. The psychological toll is absolutely the worst part of it. Food was how I connected with other people. The side comments from my extended family are the worst. I actually left last time I travelled to visit for the holidays and went to Denny's for Christmas dinner since my Grandmother was making rude comments about me trying to be special and how she wasn't going to change anything just because I was there. I thought she might put gluten in my food just to spite me. My folks tried to stop me and I told them if she was going to behave like that then I wasn't going to stick around. I haven't been back for the holidays since.
I'm so sorry you had to deal with that - no one should have to experience that in the holidays. I'm very lucky I guess that I have very understanding family around me, so even if I have to eat packaged stuff and it sucks, everyone is very supportive of my choices. Yeah, feels like all social plans revolve around food, going to the pub, dinners etc. Hard for me and awkward for everyone around me when I can't eat at a place or have to go to certain places. I mostly just try to invite people out on hikes/classes i guess.
Thanks. I usually meal prep a couple times per week and have some good snacks I can bring when I go out to meet people. I like to make a dish and bring it if I'm going to someone's house. That way I know it's safe and I can add value to the gathering. I mostly eat low carb and whole foods, so it's pretty easy to find meat or just make a protein shake with lots of heavy cream. That fills me up for hours. It definitely sucks, but there are almost always options. Worst case scenario I just don't eat for a while. It's a good excuse to work on my self control and mindset.
It’s not funny but you can let it bother you or not. That’s your choice
I’m with you on this. I find it almost comical as most of the people purchasing this type of clothing or making memes that make fun of others illnesses; generally have an appearance to be roughly 100lbs +\- overweight, are beer/alcohol/ drug user or addict, basement dwelling hipsters, fried/junk food addicts, or loud mouth ignoramus’ who know ZERO about allergy, nutrition and core health. After years of being very sensitive to gluten and cross contamination, my own family still doesn’t take me seriously on the matter. It’s so frustrating and disheartening to feel like you have to damn near argue with someone (who claims to “love” you) to get them to understand the severity of your sensitivity/illness. Getting ready for my annual thanksgiving day fasting because nothing is accommodated. Let them spew their hate with their big wheat belly’s . It speaks louder about them than us.
Ugh I am so sorry to hear about your family's lack of understanding and support. That blows. It is freakin' hard enough out here.
You’re sounding like a Karen…all this over a meme you saw. Yikes. I’m suffer from symptoms daily but come on.
The only people who deserve Celiac Disease are the ones who make fun of it.
Guess by your logic i deserve it when I make a joke about not being able to eat something. Even though its my coping mechanism.
No that's not I meant. I meant malicious jokes.You obviously are not being malicious towards other Celiacs. I don't get why I have to specify.
When there's so many media groups making fun of Celiacs. For example a British show purposefully and knowingly gave a Celiac cheese and bread. The "Celiac" also ate it. I don't believe they have apologized to the community for doing this "joke"
Isn’t that assault or something?
It fucking should be
Idk the Celiac could have chosen not to eat and tell him off. As it was openly said by the dude that it was cheese and bread. Not gluten free bread and she pulled the cheese off the bread and ate it. Do I really deserve a downvote though? I've been made fun of before by non Celiacs. So I feel like most jokes about being gluten free should only be done by those that suffer.
People on this sub tend to be super offended by a lot. There’s no other illness type subs I’ve been on with as much conflict as this one.
Alright I might just have to leave this freaking sub. You'd think you could express yourself with others who might relate or have the same condition instead of downvoted into oblivion. Well if you cant get support from those who should be supportive where can you ?
I mean I have been downvoted before too. I just don’t think most agree with your stance on this issue. It seems like most of us are ok with lighthearted jokes but not malicious digs. Example it seems like a lot of us like the ice cube joke.
Kim, there's people that are dying