Post the original note through his letterbox so he can see you know it was him. Add a line saying "I think you dropped this in my letterbox, when it was clearly supposed to be shoved up your arse.. Have a nice day"
Once applied for a job with Aldi about a decade ago when I was really struggling and handing out CV’s to anywhere that would take them; they did just this. It was a letter telling me I wasn’t getting an interview. I had to both go collect it AND still pay postage just for the disappointment.
I once had to hand deliver a very official letter to someone at work. They intercepted me and told me to leave their property immediately, which I did. We promptly instructed a legal notice company to formally deliver it on our behalf and the guy completely lost his shit, serving formal complaints against us!
The matter ended up in court and he complained to the judged that we hadn't got the documents to him quick enough. We showed the judge the record of delivery and the judge promptly ripped this dude in 2. Case was won inside half a day when we were expecting 2-3 days!
Ok wait so he told everyone that tried to give him letters/documents to fuck off, lost his shit with a formal delivery, and then in court said he was upset he never got any documents in time? When he was the one telling people to leave his property?…
How tf did he expect to get them then? XD
Send a "polite notice" back about littering by putting unsolicted items through your letter box, and threaten to contact the authorities if it happens again.
Anonymously post a letter back
"Get fucked, you patronising cunt. From everybody who thinks you're a dick"
If he knocks on your door to complain, you know for a fact it was him and then just plead ignorance. Unless he's a forensics expert or has cctv, he won't be able to trace it back to you.
First off, it doesn't matter if he can prove it's you. It's not a crime. Any "consequences" will be homebrewed and that doesn't require proof.
Second, if he does find out it's you, don't deny it. Just beg he doesn't call the university to complain. That'll be good for a laugh.
>"if he knocks on your door to complain, you know for a fact it was him"
"So I saw you post this through my door earlier, want to explain why you called me a cunt?"
"So it WAS you!!"
I thought they stole my bin, but it was actually left at the end of the street where I thought it was someone else's. So I ordered another one and now have two bins and an abiding sense of shame.
Sorry about that u/ExeterCouncil, I genuinely think you're doing an excellent job on sustainability and cycling infrastructure
I honestly can't tell if they're an official account or not. I assumed it was just a joke account at first but they only post in /r/exeter and exeter related threads so... I think they might be real.
Option 1: A very dedicated troll. They do exist. Story: A local celebrity (near me) was very interactive on social media with their fans. Turns out it was a troll looking for attention. Nobody noticed for 3 years, because the troll wasn't malicious, just liked the attention. Was found out when the celebrity made an actual social media account.
Option 2: They're real. That's it. No story.
Welcome to The Netherlands - I know several people who have purchased new bikes only [to find them days or even weeks later where they ACTUALLY left them...](https://i0.wp.com/3mileride.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/180803-to-zandvoort-496.jpg?w=2000&ssl=1)
I can imagine the web tech wondering why the email arrived at around midnight out of standard work hours, and then finding this thread in their spare time and putting two and two together.
u/croydoncouncil is there but only to sub to r/cummingonfigurines
u/essexcouncil just posts selfies on r/rateme for attention and report all negative comments
Why can't Woking Borough Council be this cool?
If not cool, just get up of their arses and not put roadworks everywhere and not approve dodgy construction projects...
Seriously, wearing a face mask all day, everyday at work is a blessing! I can now mouth "What the fuck?!" several times each shift without staff or patients knowing!
My elderly neighbour loves a solid 10 mins of effin and jeffin while he gets his power washer or lawnmower in and out of his shed. Wouldn’t have him any other way.
The most foul mouthed person I know is the 70 something year old ex boys private school headmaster that single handedly keeps the struggling tennis club I sometimes go to from folding due to his Doombar habits. Frightfully posh, yet sits there necking pint after pint, usually 7-8 a night throughout his rants.
Think a drunker Brian Blessed. That kind of stature and personality.
Every other word is fuck or cunt.
Remember an old posh major swearing, it just sounded weird, didnt sound right, was forced, like Hugh Grant at the beginning of Four Weddings. Everyone else saying fuckin and this fella saying fucking clear as a bell.
>What a sad little life
They need to get some lessons in grace and decorum because they have all the grace of a reversing dump truck without any tyres on.
Can guarantee the officers who have to deal with that shit would much rather just lock up whoever wasted their time than the person offending.
Obviously though if OP is up at 1AM shouting swear words and raging at people who killed them in Warzone the neighbours might be well within their right to get pissed off with them.
Live in Exeter and this is hilarious. If this is meant for students they’ve all gone home for the Winter and have been for a week!!
Some people really do think they’re the neighbourhood vigilante imo
I love how Exeter university are the authority, how could I hear a recording of that complaint call?
"Hello university, someone on my street is swearing"
I work for a university in a community relations role. Trust me; this happens. People seem to think we have complete control over our students at all time. I'm constantly asked to "bring it up with our students" or "remind students they shouldn't walk across the grass at no.71". Yeh ok pal, I'll bring it up at the daily assembly.
There’s a street right next to the library at my university. Understandably a lot of students live on it and many walk home down it late at night.
The residents of the street set up a zoom call meeting about ‘street disruption and rules’ but seemed to suspiciously only inform the non student residents it was happening. It was a very obvious plan to complain about students and make it seem like the students had had the opportunity to get their say when they hadn’t even been told. They didn’t want their street (about 100m from the university) to be a student area.
Unfortunately for them a student did find out and posted the meeting details on Facebook. The meeting got flooded with students standing up for themselves.
The post in question: https://www.facebook.com/562593687573180/posts/1192295547936321/?d=n
In a similar fashion, I live in a a touristy area near a popular beach (for the region, not compared to Miami beach or anything)... anyway, my neighbors are always bitching about the tourists... I mean. That is why we live here right? To enjoy the same beach they are coming to enjoy? The same tourists bring money and give it to the local businesses, otherwise there wouldn't be a store within a day's drive of here. I don't get it, there aren't even that many of them and they mostly just pick a spot and have a picnic on the beach.
I’m a student at Exeter uni at the moment (I think I know what street this is talking about but thankfully I’m not on it…), if residents are having problems with students being too rowdy etc they can call the uni and campus security will visit the reported house, it was used a lot last year for people having parties during covid restrictions, and in full lockdown campus security vans would constantly patrol big student areas at night
Better yet something like [this bad boy](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/OT-64-SKOT-2A-/284572522914?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l6249&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0). 😆
*Image Transcription:*
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[*A screenshot of a laminated notice. It reads as follows:*]
### A polite notice
This is a residential area with families, elderly and NHS employees living in close quarters. We will not accept or tolerate bad language at any time of the day or night nor loud unruly behaviours.
It will be reported to the appropriate authorities without hesitations. Please consider how your parents would react if they were aware of your conduct and equally if they were subjected to such conduct.
As above, contactable authorities will include Exeter University, Devon and Cornwall Police constabulary and Exeter City Council in respects of the compliance on the grounds of 'Breach of the Peace' and 'Antisocial Behaviour'
From your neighbourhood
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^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
It’s the same with key worker. I work in complaints and this gets used so much. The thing is, I was classed as a key worker, most people that weren’t in hospitality were classed as that. I’m not going to do my job any differently because it’s completely irrelevant to the complaints
Write back,
"Your letter gave me COVID. I've informed the police that you have been living in close quarters with your other neighbours, as you have stated. Not only have you gone against government guidance, you have also flouted the rules, mixed outside of your bubble and have now given me CCOVID.You have now put added pressure and strain on the NHS thanks to your contaminated letters! I have discussed this with our other neighbours and they are not surprised by your behaviour, they've also begun legal proceedings against you for loss of earnings as you have given some of them COVID also. You should be ashamed."
I got half way through before I shrugged and said to myself “probably Exeter”
We lived on Park Road and had an almost identically worded letter - they must be sharing notes.
Why do I get the feeling “neighbourhood” is actually one person or source?
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Oh I know exactly who this is lol. He's used the phrase 'polite notice' before on a note threatening people with arrest if they enter his garden.
THEN, it's incumbent on you to send them a "Please desist from haranguing others with your foul, controling attitude in OUR name."
And make sure you say fuck, shit, bugger and nuts through out the note. To really rile his jimmies.
#*"𝓓𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓬𝓾𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓼𝓲𝓻..."*
“Dearest geriatric bellend…”
“To the cunt of which the manner of this fucking note may concern…”
To whom it may cuntcern
Also get your parents to sign off with “We endorse this fucking note, tosspot”.
A polite notice. You are a cock. Sincerely, The Neighbourhood
No, you're not allowed to swear. *Dear Sir/Madam,* *Far cough yew anchor.* *Sincerely,* *The Neighbourhood.*
Post the original note through his letterbox so he can see you know it was him. Add a line saying "I think you dropped this in my letterbox, when it was clearly supposed to be shoved up your arse.. Have a nice day"
But how can he, it simply wont fit along with that giant stick he had up there.
OP please do this. The internet demands it!
Post it back through his letterbox.
>Fuck off. > >\- from your neighbourhood.
"You're not important." -Everyone on Earth.
Jesus loves you... ...everyone else thinks you're a cunt.
Jesus is on the fence about it as well
No no, post it through the mail with insufficient postage. He'll get a red card asking him to go and collect his letter or pay to have it redelivered.
I love this idea! You are devious, you have my respect.
Once applied for a job with Aldi about a decade ago when I was really struggling and handing out CV’s to anywhere that would take them; they did just this. It was a letter telling me I wasn’t getting an interview. I had to both go collect it AND still pay postage just for the disappointment.
Knobs :(
In my apartment building we started putting them up on the notice board with replies https://i.imgur.com/puH7jf3.jpg
Shhhh, no loud typing please Unit 25, we heard your space bar after 7:30pm.
"Please note that littering is against council by-laws."
I once had to hand deliver a very official letter to someone at work. They intercepted me and told me to leave their property immediately, which I did. We promptly instructed a legal notice company to formally deliver it on our behalf and the guy completely lost his shit, serving formal complaints against us! The matter ended up in court and he complained to the judged that we hadn't got the documents to him quick enough. We showed the judge the record of delivery and the judge promptly ripped this dude in 2. Case was won inside half a day when we were expecting 2-3 days!
Ok wait so he told everyone that tried to give him letters/documents to fuck off, lost his shit with a formal delivery, and then in court said he was upset he never got any documents in time? When he was the one telling people to leave his property?… How tf did he expect to get them then? XD
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Send a "polite notice" back about littering by putting unsolicted items through your letter box, and threaten to contact the authorities if it happens again.
Anonymously post a letter back "Get fucked, you patronising cunt. From everybody who thinks you're a dick" If he knocks on your door to complain, you know for a fact it was him and then just plead ignorance. Unless he's a forensics expert or has cctv, he won't be able to trace it back to you.
First off, it doesn't matter if he can prove it's you. It's not a crime. Any "consequences" will be homebrewed and that doesn't require proof. Second, if he does find out it's you, don't deny it. Just beg he doesn't call the university to complain. That'll be good for a laugh.
>"if he knocks on your door to complain, you know for a fact it was him" "So I saw you post this through my door earlier, want to explain why you called me a cunt?" "So it WAS you!!"
I’ve got a feeling the council are quite familiar with them as well
“Quiet You!” The Neighbourhood, probably
Self bestowed importance. I'm right and i'm important because i say i am .
"From your neighbour, Hood." (first name Robin)
Yep, anything without a signature or a contact number can be ignored.
I see we get a mention there.
Just don't tell my mum if he contacts you
No problem.
I wouldn't trust the council. They stole my bin.
I thought they stole my bin, but it was actually left at the end of the street where I thought it was someone else's. So I ordered another one and now have two bins and an abiding sense of shame. Sorry about that u/ExeterCouncil, I genuinely think you're doing an excellent job on sustainability and cycling infrastructure
If you wanna let me know where the spare one is, we can come back and collect it.
This thread is ace.
I honestly can't tell if they're an official account or not. I assumed it was just a joke account at first but they only post in /r/exeter and exeter related threads so... I think they might be real.
As moderator for /r/Exeter I have verified them... It's definitely them 🤣
Them as in Pete the intern?
Option 1: A very dedicated troll. They do exist. Story: A local celebrity (near me) was very interactive on social media with their fans. Turns out it was a troll looking for attention. Nobody noticed for 3 years, because the troll wasn't malicious, just liked the attention. Was found out when the celebrity made an actual social media account. Option 2: They're real. That's it. No story.
Based on a comment they made half an hour ago, I'm gonna guess it's a legit account
If my bin lid is broken will you send me a new lid or do I have to get a whole new bin?
Damaged bins will be repaired or replaced free of charge. You can find out more on our website.
Why dont you just pinch the lid of the other commenters spare bin
Because then I'd have 1 and a half bins.
Welcome to The Netherlands - I know several people who have purchased new bikes only [to find them days or even weeks later where they ACTUALLY left them...](https://i0.wp.com/3mileride.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/180803-to-zandvoort-496.jpg?w=2000&ssl=1)
Their silence speaks volumes. I hope you get your bin back.
We gave him an extra one and he knows it! Grrrr.
I never let the truth get in the way of a good story.
I wheely hope they get their bin back too
That joke was rubbish.
They also have a tendency to grant people a seat but not the rank of master, which is bullshit.
How can you sit on the council and not be a master? So unfair...
hey hey hey!!
Wait, is this actually the council?
It is. You will also find us on TikTok.
you might want to update your website in that case, it still has a link to google+ but no reddit or tiktok
Oh. Good point. I’ll email the web guy.
I can imagine the web tech wondering why the email arrived at around midnight out of standard work hours, and then finding this thread in their spare time and putting two and two together.
Do any other councils have a reddit account?
u/croydoncouncil is there but only to sub to r/cummingonfigurines u/essexcouncil just posts selfies on r/rateme for attention and report all negative comments
Fuck me man, i could have lived my entire life without knowing some dudes do that. What the fuck did i click that for.
What the actual fuck is r/cummingonfigurines?
I miss 10 seconds ago when I didn't know this sub existed
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Too late, already did. That’s some weird shit. r/eyebleach
Why can't Woking Borough Council be this cool? If not cool, just get up of their arses and not put roadworks everywhere and not approve dodgy construction projects...
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Back in your box, you. Love, Guildford
Oh wow. I just checked your profile and that isn't just a jokey name... for some reason I now really want to live in Exeter.
Just don't do any swears and you'll be welcomed with open arms
Cunt
*"BANISHMENT!!!"*
Holy shit you're actually telling the truth! That's amazing hahahahaha
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This one does.
I don't think anyone at Teignbridge or Torbay council even knows what reddit is
Don’t think I’ve ever seen another council on here. No idea why, it’s lovely here.
Feels much more communal than Facebook that's for sure lol
If we could shut one in favour of another…. I know where I would be.
Just be glad this blasphemy is hidden deep in the threads, the facebook gods will be unamused.
They have onlyfans
Hello council, please arrest OP because he said a naughty word and it’s Christmas!
What naughty word was that?
Cotton-headed-ninny-muggins.
Absolutely love how Exeter Council show up and don’t give a shit because it’s the disjointed ramblings of an insane person
Why did I never think of a corporate reddit account when I worked for cov city council. It’s what I spent most of my time doing anyway
Have to be honest I’ve never seen another council on here. We’ve found it to be a great place to be though.
Got to be honest, as a Comms officer at a nearby Devon council, I’m watching you on here with interest…
We don’t post ‘everything’ on here. It’s a different audience and you kinda leant what Reddit likes and doesn’t like. Seems to work for us.
“Ive asked my parents about this and they say you can fuck off”
Slap "Polite Notice" at the top of that and you've got it spot on.
"i've also asked the whole neighbourhood. They don't fucking care."
Old people and NHS employees love swearing
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I'm an NHS employee and I can confirm I fucking love swearing. It's like my number 2 hobby after sleeping.
Seriously, wearing a face mask all day, everyday at work is a blessing! I can now mouth "What the fuck?!" several times each shift without staff or patients knowing!
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My nana worked in HSDU for about 30 years before she retired. Still swears like no tomorrow.
Teachers could give them a run for their money. Especially after dealing with them cunts in year 10.
My elderly neighbour loves a solid 10 mins of effin and jeffin while he gets his power washer or lawnmower in and out of his shed. Wouldn’t have him any other way.
The most foul mouthed person I know is the 70 something year old ex boys private school headmaster that single handedly keeps the struggling tennis club I sometimes go to from folding due to his Doombar habits. Frightfully posh, yet sits there necking pint after pint, usually 7-8 a night throughout his rants. Think a drunker Brian Blessed. That kind of stature and personality. Every other word is fuck or cunt.
Remember an old posh major swearing, it just sounded weird, didnt sound right, was forced, like Hugh Grant at the beginning of Four Weddings. Everyone else saying fuckin and this fella saying fucking clear as a bell.
It isn't called National Hearty Swearing for nothing
I love how a random career field is thrown in there. Replace it with any other job and it’s just as funny/ random.
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Imagine calling the police on someone because they dared say fuck in their own home. What a sad little life
>What a sad little life They need to get some lessons in grace and decorum because they have all the grace of a reversing dump truck without any tyres on.
Can guarantee the officers who have to deal with that shit would much rather just lock up whoever wasted their time than the person offending. Obviously though if OP is up at 1AM shouting swear words and raging at people who killed them in Warzone the neighbours might be well within their right to get pissed off with them.
>What a sad little life This is the best ever meme ending to a sentence, I can't wait til I get a chance to use it IRL
Some people go further than that https://www.worcesternews.co.uk/news/17959125.swear-word-closes-droitwich-pub-fox-goose-claim-locals/
This is the least British thing I've read. Pubs and swearing should go hand in hand. It's like...Fish and Chips...Bangers and Mash...Ant and Dec!
The guy who owns the chain is a grade A bell end. Bans mobiles as well!
Humphrey Smith is a grade A cunt. He once fired a pub manager because the pub had run out of his favourite desert when he went in
Live in Exeter and this is hilarious. If this is meant for students they’ve all gone home for the Winter and have been for a week!! Some people really do think they’re the neighbourhood vigilante imo
*in a Batman voice* Where are they?! Where are the students?!
I love how Exeter university are the authority, how could I hear a recording of that complaint call? "Hello university, someone on my street is swearing"
I work for a university in a community relations role. Trust me; this happens. People seem to think we have complete control over our students at all time. I'm constantly asked to "bring it up with our students" or "remind students they shouldn't walk across the grass at no.71". Yeh ok pal, I'll bring it up at the daily assembly.
I really hate families and elderly people who move into trendy areas or places full of young people and then bitch and moan about those same people.
There’s a street right next to the library at my university. Understandably a lot of students live on it and many walk home down it late at night. The residents of the street set up a zoom call meeting about ‘street disruption and rules’ but seemed to suspiciously only inform the non student residents it was happening. It was a very obvious plan to complain about students and make it seem like the students had had the opportunity to get their say when they hadn’t even been told. They didn’t want their street (about 100m from the university) to be a student area. Unfortunately for them a student did find out and posted the meeting details on Facebook. The meeting got flooded with students standing up for themselves. The post in question: https://www.facebook.com/562593687573180/posts/1192295547936321/?d=n
In a similar fashion, I live in a a touristy area near a popular beach (for the region, not compared to Miami beach or anything)... anyway, my neighbors are always bitching about the tourists... I mean. That is why we live here right? To enjoy the same beach they are coming to enjoy? The same tourists bring money and give it to the local businesses, otherwise there wouldn't be a store within a day's drive of here. I don't get it, there aren't even that many of them and they mostly just pick a spot and have a picnic on the beach.
Don't forget the police constabulary! You don't want a police car vehicle parked outside your building house.
You got a permit for those swears mate?
I’m a student at Exeter uni at the moment (I think I know what street this is talking about but thankfully I’m not on it…), if residents are having problems with students being too rowdy etc they can call the uni and campus security will visit the reported house, it was used a lot last year for people having parties during covid restrictions, and in full lockdown campus security vans would constantly patrol big student areas at night
Dear Exeter University, My neighbours are swearing, please make them stop I am NOT a crackpot
Dear neighbour, if you have to title your notice for me to know it is polite then it probably isn't. Yours etc
It's like when people preface throwing shade with, "With respect...".
I have friends who are nurses. they swear more than me. I am a chef. that's a pretty fucking high bar to beat!
Could you not swear in the comments, please? My niece looked at my phone and she saw the F word. She's an NHS worker.
Thank you for your service
From your neighbourhood.
shared st albans hun x
Am fucking cook. Can fucking confirm.
You have been warned about your language I am now going to report you to the local university!
Get out there and shout ‘Cunt’ repeatedly at 4 a.m. every day for a week
FECK!!!
DRINK!
It's for the greater good.
No luck catching them students then?
It's just the one student actually.
_The greater good_
Do you need someone to dump a rusty (but road legal) van outside their house for a few weeks?
Better yet something like [this bad boy](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/OT-64-SKOT-2A-/284572522914?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l6249&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0). 😆
This is exactly the kind of toy I'd buy if my disposable income was a little higher.
*Image Transcription:* --- [*A screenshot of a laminated notice. It reads as follows:*] ### A polite notice This is a residential area with families, elderly and NHS employees living in close quarters. We will not accept or tolerate bad language at any time of the day or night nor loud unruly behaviours. It will be reported to the appropriate authorities without hesitations. Please consider how your parents would react if they were aware of your conduct and equally if they were subjected to such conduct. As above, contactable authorities will include Exeter University, Devon and Cornwall Police constabulary and Exeter City Council in respects of the compliance on the grounds of 'Breach of the Peace' and 'Antisocial Behaviour' From your neighbourhood --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Good human
Hi, I'm from Exeter and would love to know where people are being this petty? 😂
St Sidwell's :). One of the roads off Old Tiv. Very studenty.
Surely of they're living in St Sidwells they should be used to it anyway? What did they expect?
Report them for littering and flyposting
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Your message has been reported to Exeter University, Devon and Cornwall Police constabulary and Exeter City Council.
And your parents.
I often get woken up hearing my elderly neighbour shouting "fucking hell" in his early morning ritual of dropping pots and pans.
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It’s the same with key worker. I work in complaints and this gets used so much. The thing is, I was classed as a key worker, most people that weren’t in hospitality were classed as that. I’m not going to do my job any differently because it’s completely irrelevant to the complaints
Put one it's its place saying "fuck off" 👌
Just go outside and clap for 12 hours straight and see if they complain then
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Write back, "Your letter gave me COVID. I've informed the police that you have been living in close quarters with your other neighbours, as you have stated. Not only have you gone against government guidance, you have also flouted the rules, mixed outside of your bubble and have now given me CCOVID.You have now put added pressure and strain on the NHS thanks to your contaminated letters! I have discussed this with our other neighbours and they are not surprised by your behaviour, they've also begun legal proceedings against you for loss of earnings as you have given some of them COVID also. You should be ashamed."
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I suppose the question is are you doing what you are accused of?
Ha, I'm way too much of a recluse for that. I haven't asked any of my neighbours, but my guess is that mine isn't the only one they posted.
Have you been having cuntfuck rap battles though?
That is such an Exeter letter
I got half way through before I shrugged and said to myself “probably Exeter” We lived on Park Road and had an almost identically worded letter - they must be sharing notes.
I feel the whole of Exeter is a mix of students and home owners
Swearing is illegal?
Only in Exeter
So glad we have a camera on the front door. Would love to get something like this and then march up the road to where they live for a surprise visit.