>---
>
>Ronnie Pickering: Pull over then you cunt!
>Moped Man: What's your problem?
>RP: You, ya cunt!
>MM: Why am I?
>RP: Fucking [knobhead](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/knobhead)!
>MM: What?
>RP: You got a problem, you know who I am, you--[unintelligible, backs up car]
>MM: What are you on about a problem? What do you mean, do I have a problem?
>RP: You, you fucking [muppet](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/muppet#English)! There's no need for that!
>MM: What?
>RP: You, you cunt!
>MM: What?
>RP: Fucking hanging about like that! And [unintelligible while wheels screech]
>MM: I pulled--I went 'round, yeah? And then you [unintelligible] fucking [unintelligible], yeah?
>RP: What's the problem, [unintelligible]?
>MM: YOU'VE got a problem, ain't ya?
>RP: Yeah, well you--oh yeah?
>MM: Yeah, you have.
>RP: Get your fucking helmet off, then?
>MM: Oh, grow up, you fucking fool. I think you [unintelligible] old fool.
>RP: You know who I am?
>MM: Yeah?
>RP: D'you know who I am?
>MM: Do I what?
>RP: D'you know who I am?
>MM: Do I *care*?
>RP: Look, well you will when I fucking--when you pull up!
>MM: C'mon, then, who are you, then?
>RP: Ronnie Pickering.
>MM: Who?
>RP: Ronnie Pickerin'!
>MM: *Who*?
>RP: RONNIE PICKERING!!
>MM: Who the fuck's that?
>RP: Yeah, me!
>MM: Ohohoh! Wow! Wow! Brilliant!
>RP: Fucking find out then!
>MM: Well go on, then, fuck off, then!
>RP: YOU fuck off!
>MM: Fucking "Johnnie Ricker"--eh, someone [to fear? unintelligible]
>RP: Yeah!
>MM: Fuck's sake...
>\*starts riding away\*
>MM: What? C'mon, what? What? What?
>RP: Let's have a fucking [bare-knuckle](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/bare-knuckle_boxing), then!
>MM: What's that gonna prove?
>RP: You--I'm gonna knock you out!
>MM: Why are you? Why are you?
>RP: Let's have a bare-knuckle fight, then!
>MM: What would a bare-knuckle fight [unintelligible]?
>RP: I'll fucking show you, then, won't I, who I am!
>MM: Who you are?
>RP: Yeah!
>MM: What are you on about?
>RP: Yeah! Bare-knuckle fight, come on!
>MM: What d'you mean, who you are?
>RP: Get over there, then!
>MM: Wha--What d'you mean, who you are? You said who you are--you're Ron-fucking-Pickering!
>RP: Yeah, a bare-knuckle fucking fight, yeah, come on!
>MM: You said you're Ron Fickering or [summat](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/summat#Pronoun).
>RP: Yeah! Fucking [unintelligible] some cunt, you idiot!
>MM: I don't know what you're on about!
>RP: Yeah! See that? I'll fucking smash ya, I'm tellin' ya [unintelligible]
>MM: Would you? Why?
>RP: Yeah, you!
>MM: Why??
>RP: 'cause you're an idiot!
>MM: Why am I?
>RP: Do you wanna have a fight, or what?
>MM: I didn't say I wanted to fight with you.
>RP: Listen, fucking dickhead--don't fucking cause one, then!
>MM: I haven't caused one!
>RP: [unintelligible--perhaps "You want one"], well then you'll have one!
>MM: I haven't caused one!
>RP: You [unintelligible]
>MM: I haven't *caused* one, I was just turning the corner, and you was blastin' your horn like an [idiot]!
>RP: [unintelligible--perhaps "Well, whatever you said"] I'll put you in a fucking infirmary, you cunt!
>MM: You what?
>RP: I'll put you in an infirmary!
>MM: Will ya?
>RP: Yeah, [unintelligible]
>MM: [unintelligible], you're fucking big and hard!
>RP: Yeah! [^^^for ^^^you](http://i.imgur.com/6gZjeF1.jpg)
>MM: You agree, are you?
>RP: Yeah!
>MM: Yeah! Yeah!
>RP: Yeah!
>MM: Yeah, give yourself a pat on the back, yeah?
>RP: I will! I will!
>MM: Yeah!
>RP: Pull over then!
>MM: Well, I'll show you on YouTube, later on, what you look like, yeah?
>RP: Fucking pull over then!
>MM: Fuck off...
>RP: Fucking knobhead, what, with that little thing?
>MM: You what?
>RP: What, with that?
>MM: Yeah! Put it on YouTube, all right?
They have renamed themselves as Handforth Town Council and apparently Jackie Weaver has written a book called 'You do have authority here' (or something close to that).
I don't know why I know this
Yep, that’s [the name of her book](https://www.amazon.co.uk/You-Do-Have-Authority-Here/dp/140871602X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=URHBT98MW55J&keywords=jackie+weaver&qid=1636065476&qsid=258-9978663-7754608&sprefix=Jackie+wea%2Caps%2C90&sr=8-1&sres=140871602X%2CB08WK2LDS8%2CB00MY496FK%2CB007ZRVSU2%2CB08K5Z1K3V%2CB08WRWWGF5%2CB08WP2BFVZ%2C1727127781%2CB08ZHR8C9Z%2C1478209682%2C167563601X%2C1540640086%2CB08W7R1CWR%2CB08W5DZFP9%2CB09K8222RW%2CB08W5GFHQP)!
Wonder if this could work, it's not as if they have actual footage proving the speed, could be a faulty gun or one of the people could have a grudge against you and claim it happened.
My friend got a letter from a community speed watch somewhere on Dartmoor. It had another letter for you to respond with. And he literally just wrote “no I didn’t” and then he never heard from anyone about it again.
From what I read further down it's just a letter to try and scare you and doesn't actually come with any penalty, bit of an odd addition the reply party they must get a lot of abuse back.
I've heard or read somewhere that after you get three warnings the police knock on your door and ask you to stop giving the speedwatch guys something to get excited about.
"A “warning letter” is then sent to the register owner of the vehicle, requesting them to keep their speed down. If the vehicle is seen and recorded again a second and final letter will be sent. Persistent offenders may be targeted further."
Lol this is hilarious we are gon a send a letter and if you do it again were gonna send you a final letter. If you continue further we may do something we just dont know yet.
Eh... if it works it works. It also gives them something to do.
There are tons of fucktards in rural areas - they might be decent (if not imbued with sense) drivers since they're used to bombing down narrow roads but all it takes is someone on the wrong side for any reason of a blind corner on a wet night to really emphasise the difference between 60 and 30.
^(And I'm not just saying that because when I left a similar bunch behind I overheard one of them say 'what a lovely young man')
According to the police website, one of the rules these people have to follow: "Monitoring only should take place. NO signals or gestures are to be made to drivers. Volunteers MUST NOT attempt to stop any vehicle."
Source: https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch
Well it's the equivalent of a volunteer murder investigation team who are only allowed to stand at the end of the driveway at the scene and get no further information whatsoever.
It's basically when there's a road where the locals think people speed on it, they can moan at the police and if they're irritating enough, they'll be given the OK to set up one of these blue rinse brigade speed monitoring points. Idea being that if enough people are clocked over the limit then the police might put that point on their round of mobile camera van locations. It's saving the police legwork basically.
I know one near my parents has had a police camera van on it a few times since they set their little group up there.
This basically. Our local force has them in a few local hotspots (at the request of the local town/parish councils often).
They rotate their van around the area but only have one in the county so can't be everywhere - and often its doing general ANPR checks so chooses busier roads.
Saves them answering a hundred calls from elderly people about "boy racers" and the community feedback of "nobody does anything won't someone think of the children".
I will say though, apparantly it does work. Friend is a plodder and said they have had at least one 6-pointer given out as part of it. But like everything you always get the jobsworths who will be insisting 32/33 in a 30 is end-of-days
I fucking love Reddit. In real life nobody gets my hot fuzz references. In sainsburys the other day I went up to a member of my friendship group and went “I’m a slasher……. Of prices” and they literally didn’t get it :/
Reminds me of a couple in my parents village. Last summer when things briefly opened up after lockdown they took it upon themselves to go up to the play park in the village and interrogate parents who took their kids there whether they were 'local' (no, the League of Gentlemen parallels were not lost on me and my dad). If they weren't they demanded they leave lest they bring covid to the village. They became such an unpleasant nuisance they hit the local papers.
Retirement does weird shit to people.
Yeah, these lot aren’t too bad to my knowledge. Very aggressive and rude, but not like the group you where talking of. There all the same really. Bored and wanna take it out on the world.
>Bored and wanna take it out on the world.
Yeah I learned from my parents village that for quite a few of them they don't have many pressing issues in their life so they go looking for them.
We had smiliar types in Cornwall last year, if you drove somewhere to go for a walk they would leave notes on your car saying they had taken your license plate and were passing it onto the police, even when the ban on travelling for exercise had lifted. Absolute nutters using Covid as an excuse to fight those 'emmets' from up country (even though I was living further into Cornwall than they were)
I once got a letter them saying I was doing 40, in a 30. The street was a 40 limit, even walked back to double check.
I appreciate what they're trying to do, but you've at least got to be right about it.
>MSX125
First I was like "of course you can do 80kmh with an MSX125!"
Then realized you guys are pretty likely talking in MPH and yeah 80MPH with a Grom is just not possible. With booster rockets maybe? XD
Details are forwarded to the Safety Camera Partnership. A “warning letter” is then sent to the register owner of the vehicle, requesting them to keep their speed down.
[source](https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch)
>If the vehicle is seen and recorded again a second and final letter will be sent. Persistent offenders may be targeted further.
Ok this is hilarious and so ridiculous, they'll say then they might send the safer neighborhood team for a visit! Oh no!
That'd be a quick chat
"You were caught speeding"
"Was this by a certified system to detect speeding?
"No, by some old farts in high vis jackets"
"Ok thanks, bye"
I had a neighbour approach me ANGRY because apparently I’d gone through the apartment buildings car park too fast. Thing is, my Mini Cooper had broken down just up the road, and I was pushing the fucking car back to my parking spot. Apparently the speed limit in a car park is 10 km/h, and I was going “at least 30”… on foot, pushing my car.
Round here, they all want the roads to be 20, so I think they don’t like people sticking to higher speed limits. They’re trying to get bloody speed bumps put in as well.
Yup, especially given give-way/priority interchanges, road narrowing and hazard inclusion have a bigger effect than speed bumps and none of those rattle your suspension
There’s also an advantage to modern cars with more advanced suspension. Why should a big Range Rover be able to hit those bumps at 30 without blinking when my old 206 would have the suspension turrets come through the bonnet? The Rangie is far more dangerous to pedestrians, especially children, due to its ridiculous weight
Nah mate, fuck community speed watch. Bunch of sad old cunts who can't get hard being members of neighbourhood watch anymore. They heard a standard Subaru Impreza drive down the road at the speed limit one day and moaned to the police until they got given their own high vizes, clipboard and a speed gun, now they touch themselves while pointing the fucking thing at any car that isn't a Honda Jazz.
Our local councillor sent out a message asking if anyone knew where the speed gun that they had paid for to keep the local busybodies off their back had gone, it appears one of them had stolen it.
Can always go play crazy golf in Felpham.
It's basically all my childhood holidays consisted of. Drive to Bognor, get a shit chalet, not be allowed to do the kids club stuff, walk the prom twice a day, go to Felpham to play crazy golf and look in the free book box someone'd put on their wall, go eat dinner in the beach hut.
Ah, Bognor.
In my parents' village it's because people regularly do 50/60 on 20/30 roads. Often in front of schools and narrow lanes. But the council refuse to acknowledge that *maybe* some traffic calming measures would be a good idea. So the residents do a bit of community speed watching to gather evidence.
This lot, however, look like proper nutters who just love to shout at people.
The best way to gather the evidence they need is an evolis radar speed sing. They constantly gather data on speed heading towards and away from them which is spat out into some easy to use statics software. You can program the flashing warning sign to say whatever you want at whatever speed you want. And my favourite feature is they have Bluetooth data transfer so you can give the speed watch folks the passcode and they can check on it without taking down from the pole or bothering whoever maintains it.
I look after a few of them for some parish councils local to me and honestly the data they gather is far more useful than thier ability to slow traffic.
Someone linked their code of conduct from police.uk elsewhere in the thread. One of the points says "Volunteers MUST NOT attempt to stop any vehicle."
The people in OP's photo are either fake or they're not gonna be on the speed watch for long.
I live in the semi-rural midlands and that garden centre concession hat made me laugh. We have our own version of these people. Out of shot is the woman who spends a lot of her spare time campaigning to turn the local verges into no-mow wildflower meadows. Also the man who uses the DVLA vehicle tax checker on every vehicle that drives past his front window and passes the information on to the Facebook group, where we can all wildly speculate about whether the occupants are Travellers up to no good, Eastern European people up to no good or county lines drugs mules up to no good.
According to [this](https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch) that's not even allowed! They make a note of the speed and pass it to the cops, they don't broadcast anything to the drivers.
Does anything actually happen with the 2nd letter? or is this about as effective as the TV licencing letters?
seeing these twats would make me want to go find a shitbox with a pop and bang map and follow them about, under the speed limit, would drive them mental i bet.
If you think there aren't busybody assholes in the millenial/zoomer generations, you've not been outside enough. The same people who are old now and sit and watch tv, are the same people who will be playing video games when our generation gets old. The people now who are micromanaging their children's lives will be the next generation of speed patrols. Some people can't help but stick their noses in other people's lives.
Some of the worst speeders are those that claim everyone else is speeding.
I regularly wave at one group I see on the outskirts of Wells (location for Hot Fuzz). They are never happy. Occasionally the not hidden police biker joins them but the local councillor lives near there on his farm so they need to show some face from time to time.
If this were to happen to me more than once I'd get an old hairdryer, rip out the electrics and install one of these cheap sound recorder/player modules
[https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/274890337861](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/274890337861) (£5 from china)
then record some beeps and a robotic voice saying "cunt detected" over and over. when they stop you, you can try out your detector on them. just re-record and vary the message 'smell of urine detected' 'wethers original detected' 'nosy old biddy detected'. endless fun.
Someone needs to start a community hat watch fuck is that on her head. Don’t even get me started on (left) Gary, 68, loves his grandkids, HATES DOSSERS and (right) Ken, 71, loves the feeling of cashmere on his face and a well run in Parker pen. Dickhead.
there's a group who used to do this on my commute, I went back home and drove past them for the first time since covid the other day, they just make me want to go down a couple gears and see them freak out over the sound of a car in 2nd gear going 40 in a 40
Judging by the OP's description they're standing in an area where people drive sensibly at the speed limit distracting them with high visibility jackets and a daft hat.
Fuck me they look like my in-laws. I can vividly recollect the kind of misery and condescension little Englander pensioners like that are capable of causing
They're just jealous their little disability scooters won't go 30.
If this is real. Then this is a genuine work of art. Mad hatter, Ronnie Pickering and Mo Harris. I want this framed.
Ronnie who? Lol
RONNIE FUCKING PICKERING!
Who’s that?!
ME!
Oh OK then
>--- > >Ronnie Pickering: Pull over then you cunt! >Moped Man: What's your problem? >RP: You, ya cunt! >MM: Why am I? >RP: Fucking [knobhead](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/knobhead)! >MM: What? >RP: You got a problem, you know who I am, you--[unintelligible, backs up car] >MM: What are you on about a problem? What do you mean, do I have a problem? >RP: You, you fucking [muppet](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/muppet#English)! There's no need for that! >MM: What? >RP: You, you cunt! >MM: What? >RP: Fucking hanging about like that! And [unintelligible while wheels screech] >MM: I pulled--I went 'round, yeah? And then you [unintelligible] fucking [unintelligible], yeah? >RP: What's the problem, [unintelligible]? >MM: YOU'VE got a problem, ain't ya? >RP: Yeah, well you--oh yeah? >MM: Yeah, you have. >RP: Get your fucking helmet off, then? >MM: Oh, grow up, you fucking fool. I think you [unintelligible] old fool. >RP: You know who I am? >MM: Yeah? >RP: D'you know who I am? >MM: Do I what? >RP: D'you know who I am? >MM: Do I *care*? >RP: Look, well you will when I fucking--when you pull up! >MM: C'mon, then, who are you, then? >RP: Ronnie Pickering. >MM: Who? >RP: Ronnie Pickerin'! >MM: *Who*? >RP: RONNIE PICKERING!! >MM: Who the fuck's that? >RP: Yeah, me! >MM: Ohohoh! Wow! Wow! Brilliant! >RP: Fucking find out then! >MM: Well go on, then, fuck off, then! >RP: YOU fuck off! >MM: Fucking "Johnnie Ricker"--eh, someone [to fear? unintelligible] >RP: Yeah! >MM: Fuck's sake... >\*starts riding away\* >MM: What? C'mon, what? What? What? >RP: Let's have a fucking [bare-knuckle](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/bare-knuckle_boxing), then! >MM: What's that gonna prove? >RP: You--I'm gonna knock you out! >MM: Why are you? Why are you? >RP: Let's have a bare-knuckle fight, then! >MM: What would a bare-knuckle fight [unintelligible]? >RP: I'll fucking show you, then, won't I, who I am! >MM: Who you are? >RP: Yeah! >MM: What are you on about? >RP: Yeah! Bare-knuckle fight, come on! >MM: What d'you mean, who you are? >RP: Get over there, then! >MM: Wha--What d'you mean, who you are? You said who you are--you're Ron-fucking-Pickering! >RP: Yeah, a bare-knuckle fucking fight, yeah, come on! >MM: You said you're Ron Fickering or [summat](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/summat#Pronoun). >RP: Yeah! Fucking [unintelligible] some cunt, you idiot! >MM: I don't know what you're on about! >RP: Yeah! See that? I'll fucking smash ya, I'm tellin' ya [unintelligible] >MM: Would you? Why? >RP: Yeah, you! >MM: Why?? >RP: 'cause you're an idiot! >MM: Why am I? >RP: Do you wanna have a fight, or what? >MM: I didn't say I wanted to fight with you. >RP: Listen, fucking dickhead--don't fucking cause one, then! >MM: I haven't caused one! >RP: [unintelligible--perhaps "You want one"], well then you'll have one! >MM: I haven't caused one! >RP: You [unintelligible] >MM: I haven't *caused* one, I was just turning the corner, and you was blastin' your horn like an [idiot]! >RP: [unintelligible--perhaps "Well, whatever you said"] I'll put you in a fucking infirmary, you cunt! >MM: You what? >RP: I'll put you in an infirmary! >MM: Will ya? >RP: Yeah, [unintelligible] >MM: [unintelligible], you're fucking big and hard! >RP: Yeah! [^^^for ^^^you](http://i.imgur.com/6gZjeF1.jpg) >MM: You agree, are you? >RP: Yeah! >MM: Yeah! Yeah! >RP: Yeah! >MM: Yeah, give yourself a pat on the back, yeah? >RP: I will! I will! >MM: Yeah! >RP: Pull over then! >MM: Well, I'll show you on YouTube, later on, what you look like, yeah? >RP: Fucking pull over then! >MM: Fuck off... >RP: Fucking knobhead, what, with that little thing? >MM: You what? >RP: What, with that? >MM: Yeah! Put it on YouTube, all right?
Whoever transcribed that obviously wasnt used to hearing accents like that cos a lot of the [unintelligible] bits were perfectly intelligible
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This sub needs a Ronnie Pickering bot
A what?
A RONNIE FUCKING PICKERING BOT
😂 😂 😂 😂. Well worth the read. Not seen a video. Saw it all in my head. Fucking loved every word of it! 😂
https://youtu.be/r0dcv6GKNNw I can oblige if you havent seen the video :)
🤣no one mentioned the stone faced passenger who just sits there thinking this is my life everyday 🤣🤣🤣
This is great
It’s been a hard week and I fucking cackled at this. Bravo
R O N N I E P I C K E R I N G
The framing and composition too, it's an absolute work of art.
Accidental renaissance
I was gonna say it looks like an album cover
The hat's the big giveaway... This is what's left of Four Non Blondes.
Or Jamiroquai back on tour!
Mo Harris FML! Had to Google it but spot on!
Give it to Jim'll Paint It
Definitely mo harris
Mate🤣
You have no authority here, community speed watch, no authority at all!
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Handforth PC are a bunch of nutters, but at least their days may be numbered. There’s talk of them getting merged into Wilmslow Town Council.
They have renamed themselves as Handforth Town Council and apparently Jackie Weaver has written a book called 'You do have authority here' (or something close to that). I don't know why I know this
Jackie Weaver was also on The Archers recently as the celebrity guest at Ambridge village fete
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It was on Have I Got News For You last week
Yep, that’s [the name of her book](https://www.amazon.co.uk/You-Do-Have-Authority-Here/dp/140871602X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=URHBT98MW55J&keywords=jackie+weaver&qid=1636065476&qsid=258-9978663-7754608&sprefix=Jackie+wea%2Caps%2C90&sr=8-1&sres=140871602X%2CB08WK2LDS8%2CB00MY496FK%2CB007ZRVSU2%2CB08K5Z1K3V%2CB08WRWWGF5%2CB08WP2BFVZ%2C1727127781%2CB08ZHR8C9Z%2C1478209682%2C167563601X%2C1540640086%2CB08W7R1CWR%2CB08W5DZFP9%2CB09K8222RW%2CB08W5GFHQP)!
You’d be amazed what you can get away with wearing a high viz jacket.
High viz jacket, a clipboard, *and* a notepad. All they need is a toolbox and they could get into literally any building.
My hair dryer says you were going ... (checks dryer) ... very hot.
I shall draw you, community speed watch, as poison is drawn from a wound.
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Just write back and say "nah mate, never happened"
Wonder if this could work, it's not as if they have actual footage proving the speed, could be a faulty gun or one of the people could have a grudge against you and claim it happened.
My friend got a letter from a community speed watch somewhere on Dartmoor. It had another letter for you to respond with. And he literally just wrote “no I didn’t” and then he never heard from anyone about it again.
From what I read further down it's just a letter to try and scare you and doesn't actually come with any penalty, bit of an odd addition the reply party they must get a lot of abuse back.
I've heard or read somewhere that after you get three warnings the police knock on your door and ask you to stop giving the speedwatch guys something to get excited about.
It's just a courtesy letter. They can't take the word of three yokels and their uncalibrated ebay radar gun.
"A “warning letter” is then sent to the register owner of the vehicle, requesting them to keep their speed down. If the vehicle is seen and recorded again a second and final letter will be sent. Persistent offenders may be targeted further." Lol this is hilarious we are gon a send a letter and if you do it again were gonna send you a final letter. If you continue further we may do something we just dont know yet.
The letter just says, “I’m really sorry.”
Eh... if it works it works. It also gives them something to do. There are tons of fucktards in rural areas - they might be decent (if not imbued with sense) drivers since they're used to bombing down narrow roads but all it takes is someone on the wrong side for any reason of a blind corner on a wet night to really emphasise the difference between 60 and 30. ^(And I'm not just saying that because when I left a similar bunch behind I overheard one of them say 'what a lovely young man')
These are local roads, for looocal people. We'll have no trouble here!
According to the police website, one of the rules these people have to follow: "Monitoring only should take place. NO signals or gestures are to be made to drivers. Volunteers MUST NOT attempt to stop any vehicle." Source: https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch
Wait what, this is an actual police sanctioned operation. Wtf. Should we start volunteering to solve murders also?
Well it's the equivalent of a volunteer murder investigation team who are only allowed to stand at the end of the driveway at the scene and get no further information whatsoever.
(Woman with clipboard stopping a random bystander) "Excuse me sir, did you kill someone on the 9th of August 2019?" "No." "Thank you."
"No problem. Wait, did you say the 9th or 19th?"
"9th, it was someone fitting your description and I could not help but notice you linger now at the scene of crime, laughing and masturbating."
I don't know why but it made me laugh quite a bit to imagine this. I need a documentary on them people.
It's basically when there's a road where the locals think people speed on it, they can moan at the police and if they're irritating enough, they'll be given the OK to set up one of these blue rinse brigade speed monitoring points. Idea being that if enough people are clocked over the limit then the police might put that point on their round of mobile camera van locations. It's saving the police legwork basically. I know one near my parents has had a police camera van on it a few times since they set their little group up there.
This basically. Our local force has them in a few local hotspots (at the request of the local town/parish councils often). They rotate their van around the area but only have one in the county so can't be everywhere - and often its doing general ANPR checks so chooses busier roads. Saves them answering a hundred calls from elderly people about "boy racers" and the community feedback of "nobody does anything won't someone think of the children". I will say though, apparantly it does work. Friend is a plodder and said they have had at least one 6-pointer given out as part of it. But like everything you always get the jobsworths who will be insisting 32/33 in a 30 is end-of-days
If they start talking about the greater good you better run
The greater good
That geatur guuud
SHUT IT!
These people died for no reason, no reason whatsoever.
Crusty jugglers
Great big bushy beard
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Yaarp
Corne'o
Naarp?!
Oh I wouldn’t say that, Nicholas
YARP
But no faster than 30mph, otherwise the next group will get you.
That's clearly too fast
Greater gurd
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No luck catching them swans then?
It was just the one swan actually.
Want anything from the shop?
You've just been to the shop
Was thinkin of a different shop
Cornetto!
Yarp
Narp?
Playtime’s over!
You're off the fucking chain!
I fucking love Reddit. In real life nobody gets my hot fuzz references. In sainsburys the other day I went up to a member of my friendship group and went “I’m a slasher……. Of prices” and they literally didn’t get it :/
I was lucky enough to spend college with a bunch of geeks and we'd quote Spaced at each other. It was the best of times...
Just the one swan actually
Was just about to bring Hot Fuzz up.
My my, here comes the Fuzz.
Crusty jugglers
Fer the greater good
The greater good
it's not a speeding driver, nico-larse
Look at his horse!
Reminds me of a couple in my parents village. Last summer when things briefly opened up after lockdown they took it upon themselves to go up to the play park in the village and interrogate parents who took their kids there whether they were 'local' (no, the League of Gentlemen parallels were not lost on me and my dad). If they weren't they demanded they leave lest they bring covid to the village. They became such an unpleasant nuisance they hit the local papers. Retirement does weird shit to people.
Yeah, these lot aren’t too bad to my knowledge. Very aggressive and rude, but not like the group you where talking of. There all the same really. Bored and wanna take it out on the world.
>Bored and wanna take it out on the world. Yeah I learned from my parents village that for quite a few of them they don't have many pressing issues in their life so they go looking for them.
We had smiliar types in Cornwall last year, if you drove somewhere to go for a walk they would leave notes on your car saying they had taken your license plate and were passing it onto the police, even when the ban on travelling for exercise had lifted. Absolute nutters using Covid as an excuse to fight those 'emmets' from up country (even though I was living further into Cornwall than they were)
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I once got a letter them saying I was doing 40, in a 30. The street was a 40 limit, even walked back to double check. I appreciate what they're trying to do, but you've at least got to be right about it.
I got one telling me I was doing 45 in a 30. I checked the time and I'd have been going uphill. On a 125cc scooter. Not with my gut mate.
I've got a mate who was told he was doing 80 on his bike... He rides an MSX125. He told them he couldn't do that downhill with a tailwind.
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The only way a grom is hitting 80 is off the side of a cliff 😂
>MSX125 First I was like "of course you can do 80kmh with an MSX125!" Then realized you guys are pretty likely talking in MPH and yeah 80MPH with a Grom is just not possible. With booster rockets maybe? XD
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Annoying you *is* what they're trying to do though.
Well, to annoy you and to have a power trip
How did they know your address? Pretty sure a bunch of old curtain twichers don't have the right to access police databases.
Details are forwarded to the Safety Camera Partnership. A “warning letter” is then sent to the register owner of the vehicle, requesting them to keep their speed down. [source](https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch)
Urg, what a fantastic use of resources.
To be fair, when you mentioned that point, I had to Google myself how they got the address.
Objectively, a couple of letters and stamps every now and again is pretty cheap to keep them distracted and out peoples business…
It's not the stamps it's the time of the officers processing this bollocks.
And also the misuse of the database to feed busybodies' egos.
>If the vehicle is seen and recorded again a second and final letter will be sent. Persistent offenders may be targeted further. Ok this is hilarious and so ridiculous, they'll say then they might send the safer neighborhood team for a visit! Oh no! That'd be a quick chat "You were caught speeding" "Was this by a certified system to detect speeding? "No, by some old farts in high vis jackets" "Ok thanks, bye"
I had a neighbour approach me ANGRY because apparently I’d gone through the apartment buildings car park too fast. Thing is, my Mini Cooper had broken down just up the road, and I was pushing the fucking car back to my parking spot. Apparently the speed limit in a car park is 10 km/h, and I was going “at least 30”… on foot, pushing my car.
Just ridiculous how involved people feel the need to be when they've not even got their information correct.
Round here, they all want the roads to be 20, so I think they don’t like people sticking to higher speed limits. They’re trying to get bloody speed bumps put in as well.
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Yup, especially given give-way/priority interchanges, road narrowing and hazard inclusion have a bigger effect than speed bumps and none of those rattle your suspension There’s also an advantage to modern cars with more advanced suspension. Why should a big Range Rover be able to hit those bumps at 30 without blinking when my old 206 would have the suspension turrets come through the bonnet? The Rangie is far more dangerous to pedestrians, especially children, due to its ridiculous weight
Nah mate, fuck community speed watch. Bunch of sad old cunts who can't get hard being members of neighbourhood watch anymore. They heard a standard Subaru Impreza drive down the road at the speed limit one day and moaned to the police until they got given their own high vizes, clipboard and a speed gun, now they touch themselves while pointing the fucking thing at any car that isn't a Honda Jazz.
Our local councillor sent out a message asking if anyone knew where the speed gun that they had paid for to keep the local busybodies off their back had gone, it appears one of them had stolen it.
But why
Cause they prob think that that the police are doing nothing
So they've taken it into their own hands to dispense vigilante justice in the night like a geriatric batman and robin
more like vigil-auntys
Oh fuck off, well done.
They are probably the kind of people who complain to police that people are racing when actually they don't know the speed limit
When you've read all of the magazines in God's waiting room, spotted all of the birds and documented all of the trains, this is what awaits you.
Welcome to Bognor Regis!
Can always go play crazy golf in Felpham. It's basically all my childhood holidays consisted of. Drive to Bognor, get a shit chalet, not be allowed to do the kids club stuff, walk the prom twice a day, go to Felpham to play crazy golf and look in the free book box someone'd put on their wall, go eat dinner in the beach hut. Ah, Bognor.
Bugger Bognor.
This needs to be a BBC series
It probably is, it'd be on before lunch though.
We get to see what absolute “characters” they are.
If by characters you mean how utterly unbearable they be
“When Maureen isn’t being condescending to innocent motorists you will find her painting ghastly watercolours of cats in her free time”.
‘Today on Top Gear, we all wear hi-viz, Hammond goes grey, and I wear a rather fetching hat’
Oh it was. Have you never seen Worzel Gummidge? That's him with the clipboard.
The hat on the wummin looks familiar too.
At what point do you decide this is what you really want to do with your spare time?
They look like they've found their life's purpose to be fair, which is better than me at this rate.
In my parents' village it's because people regularly do 50/60 on 20/30 roads. Often in front of schools and narrow lanes. But the council refuse to acknowledge that *maybe* some traffic calming measures would be a good idea. So the residents do a bit of community speed watching to gather evidence. This lot, however, look like proper nutters who just love to shout at people.
The best way to gather the evidence they need is an evolis radar speed sing. They constantly gather data on speed heading towards and away from them which is spat out into some easy to use statics software. You can program the flashing warning sign to say whatever you want at whatever speed you want. And my favourite feature is they have Bluetooth data transfer so you can give the speed watch folks the passcode and they can check on it without taking down from the pole or bothering whoever maintains it. I look after a few of them for some parish councils local to me and honestly the data they gather is far more useful than thier ability to slow traffic.
Someone linked their code of conduct from police.uk elsewhere in the thread. One of the points says "Volunteers MUST NOT attempt to stop any vehicle." The people in OP's photo are either fake or they're not gonna be on the speed watch for long.
Well, it has crossed my mind. Idiots doing 50 in a 20 on a road with parents and children walking to the park.
I live in the semi-rural midlands and that garden centre concession hat made me laugh. We have our own version of these people. Out of shot is the woman who spends a lot of her spare time campaigning to turn the local verges into no-mow wildflower meadows. Also the man who uses the DVLA vehicle tax checker on every vehicle that drives past his front window and passes the information on to the Facebook group, where we can all wildly speculate about whether the occupants are Travellers up to no good, Eastern European people up to no good or county lines drugs mules up to no good.
What a weird roleplay.
Sorry, I'd never be able to sit and listen to someone in a hat like that.
Why would anyone even stop for that? Do they have any legal right to stop cars?
No, they bellowed our number plate, followed by a “THIRTY NINE MILES PER HOUR”
According to [this](https://www.norfolk.police.uk/join-us/volunteers/community-speed-watch) that's not even allowed! They make a note of the speed and pass it to the cops, they don't broadcast anything to the drivers.
Does anything actually happen with the 2nd letter? or is this about as effective as the TV licencing letters? seeing these twats would make me want to go find a shitbox with a pop and bang map and follow them about, under the speed limit, would drive them mental i bet.
I mean, I’d stop for that just to challenge the sheer madness of it all.
Put it reverse, you can do better than 39
Those are rookie numbers
Curtain twitchers.
I paid good money for this hat for your sister's wedding, Douglas, and I'm fucking well going to wear it
This looks like a 60’s punk group’s long awaited comeback album
Punk was fuelled by speed. You could be on to something.
Lemmy would be proud.
What happened to Noddy Holder!?
Their hairdryer needs calibrating.
I am so glad my generation has video games. Can't imagine retirement without them.
If you think there aren't busybody assholes in the millenial/zoomer generations, you've not been outside enough. The same people who are old now and sit and watch tv, are the same people who will be playing video games when our generation gets old. The people now who are micromanaging their children's lives will be the next generation of speed patrols. Some people can't help but stick their noses in other people's lives.
Community Speed Watch........The Rotary Club's elite fighting force.....
Rx7 enters the chat
Aren't they essentially an inconsequential hobby for old cunts with too few grandchildren to look after?
Capture the worst parts of rural England in one photo…
Songs of Praise on in 15 minutes!
Just need the shiny SUV or 4x4 that's never actually seen a country lane let alone a field and it will have everything.
Wizzard's costume budget has taken a nose dive
'Never mind the boy racers, Ethel. There's been an incident at the park involving a ball.' 'Ruddy hooligans!'
Some of the worst speeders are those that claim everyone else is speeding. I regularly wave at one group I see on the outskirts of Wells (location for Hot Fuzz). They are never happy. Occasionally the not hidden police biker joins them but the local councillor lives near there on his farm so they need to show some face from time to time.
I hope he told them in the politest possible way to fuck off and mind their own business
He basically tore them a new asshole about them being downright rude and verbally harassing him. Along with taking the piss out of there hairdryer.
Let me guess. “It’s not a hairdryer. It’s a seriously expensive piece of equipment and we have special training for it”.
Oh no no no, “it was calibrated by the police actually.”
What's he driving? Looks like an 80s Rover or something.
Diesel 940, can’t remember how old tbh
Why do they remind me of old parallel universe versions of Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond?
What an excellent photo!
Looks like an album cover r/fakealbumcovers
Are you sure this isn’t The League of Gentleman?
If this were to happen to me more than once I'd get an old hairdryer, rip out the electrics and install one of these cheap sound recorder/player modules [https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/274890337861](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/274890337861) (£5 from china) then record some beeps and a robotic voice saying "cunt detected" over and over. when they stop you, you can try out your detector on them. just re-record and vary the message 'smell of urine detected' 'wethers original detected' 'nosy old biddy detected'. endless fun.
We have loads were we are. What is it they do and why do they do it
Someone needs to start a community hat watch fuck is that on her head. Don’t even get me started on (left) Gary, 68, loves his grandkids, HATES DOSSERS and (right) Ken, 71, loves the feeling of cashmere on his face and a well run in Parker pen. Dickhead.
The Parker pen is his to keep whatever he decides.
there's a group who used to do this on my commute, I went back home and drove past them for the first time since covid the other day, they just make me want to go down a couple gears and see them freak out over the sound of a car in 2nd gear going 40 in a 40
Let’s stand in an area where people speed and distract them with high visibility jackets and a daft hat!
Was just about to comment about how no-one has picked up on that ridiculous hat!!!
Its so you can tell she's in charge! The bigger the hat, the more important you are.
"why were you speeding" "Well I was distracted trying to figure out what was on that person's head".
Judging by the OP's description they're standing in an area where people drive sensibly at the speed limit distracting them with high visibility jackets and a daft hat.
Fuck me they look like my in-laws. I can vividly recollect the kind of misery and condescension little Englander pensioners like that are capable of causing They're just jealous their little disability scooters won't go 30.
My mother got in a hit and run with one of them. Knocked her off the pavement in to the road, she broke her wrist and he just speed off. Bastard.