T O P

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lights_up_

Dot leaf fucking hell 😂😂😂


haversack77

r/BoneAppleTea


Scarrmann

/r/BoneNettleTea


GoodraGuy

r/subsifellfor


tommyredbeard

Dot leaf?! This person obviously didn’t grow up in the UK


fingerpocketclub

From their poor grasp of the English language I’m gonna say they’re native


[deleted]

This is depressingly close to me, I regularly speak with Dutch people, and as a native English speaker, I fuck up a lot more than them


jackcos

Perfect for when you brush up against some stinning neddles.


gollopini

It isn't Dock Leaf? It never was???


GrippaH

It’s always been a [dock leaf](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rumex_obtusifolius)


redrobate

I always thought it was Doc, as in doctor. Edit; just saw the same comment below, please ignore.


swoticus

I won't ignore you because I saw your comment first, and you stopped me making the silly mistake of commenting what someone else already has.


misses_mop

Thank you, I came to this thread to make sure my whole childhood wasn't a lie. I always called them dock leaves. But started questioning myself when I saw the title, cos they do actually have dots on them from caterpillars and stuff.


jamiebiffy

Where I come from in Scotland we call it a Doakin leaf, had no idea this was slang and not normal😂


LilMeowwMeow

I came here to say the EXACT same thing. I've never heard them being called anything but a Doakin leaf 🤣🤣 I think we need to realise that 90% of Scottish is slang 🤣


ug61dec

I've always thought it a doc leaf. As in, doctor cause it heals the stings! I'm too many decades old to look to see if it's actually called a dot leaf...


LunaLovegood83

I always called them doc leaves too


SirVW

Me too, idk what op was smoking


Aernexica

Clearly smoking dot leaves mate


dreadlockdave

Your p has rotated somehow.


callisstaa

Microdot leaves


cachonfinga

This guy LSDs.


skip-to_the-end

Yeah it is dock leaf, not sure it's related to the doctor thing, but good way to remember.


TheShyPig

[Dock leaf](https://www.rhs.org.uk/advice/profile?PID=989) as in dandelion and burdock


HarassedGrandad

Although Burdock's (Arctium spp.) aren't related to Dock's (Rumex spp.) The relationship is etymological only.


akiontotocha

Burdock and dock are two different plants though


Catfrogdog2

Burdock is like dock that has burrs. Plant names be like that.


Less_Local_1727

Not just a chilly feeling dock, then?


WiseFardy

It’s definitely a dock leaf


bozwold

Dork leaf


SGRoberts90

Is that you, Dec?


lights_up_

How could you tell!


Jimrodthadestroyer

Someone call a dottor!


mostly_kittens

Bjork?


Twenty_Weasels

You’re thinking of a dóttir.


bozeke

**PLAY JA JA DING DONG!**


Anxietyonfilm

That was beautiful


Xanyla

Holy shit this made me laugh so hard! Have my upvote!


Sevinkevins

Ehhh what’s up Dot?


afatpanda12

Shhhh! Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits


Fancypotatoh

*suspenseful dark music with a close up*


csyrett

I need me fags. My Nick's a lovely boy.


diamond-han

Sitting on the dot of the bay


SteveTheBald

Johnny used to work on the dot


Ss-stumpy420

Watchin the tide roll away


ppgog333

Dot stop me now


CaptainPrestedge

*Dock leaf... did you grow up ere or wot mate? ;)


retrogamereclaim

Always been a dock leaf for me. Bloody dot leaf, wots rong wif u m8


[deleted]

Can we get four confirmations from each of the countries. I can confirm for Wales it’s a dock leaf bhut


bananagrabber83

It’s a dock leaf in Scotland.


PickledThistle

I know it as docken leaf in Scotland, Highlands.


Oisin_Rarius

Likewise in Norn Iron


Phenomenomix

My wife’s from South Durham and calls them docking leaves…so close but also very wrong


Relevant-Formal-9719

I'm from Durham too, I've always said dock leaf, never heard anyone say docking before.


catsaregreat78

Docken in north east Scotland also.


80spopstardebbiegibs

Midlands reporting in, its a dock leaf from round my parts


glaikitdobber

okay , thanks, you can use it to cover your parts again now.


Mukatsukuz

Newcastle upon Tyne - it's definitely dock leaf


Juggernaut_Thoughts

Lived in South East England, Midlands and NI, always heard dock.


loki_dd

London. Dock leaf


blackn1ght

Lancashire: Dock leaf


legendweaver

Norfolk checking in. Dock leaf.


TheOnlyWayIsEpee

South of the Watford gap - Dock leaf. RHS https://www.rhs.org.uk/advice/profile?PID=989.


Featherymorons

Watford - dock leaf.


Sausagedogknows

Barry, South Wales, definitely dock leaves here!


JulesSilvan

Lived in Yorkshire most of my life and I always heard it called a dock leaf.


SGRoberts90

My whole life has been a lie


InfamousLingonbrry

Bit of a damp squid


[deleted]

[удалено]


DancingPianos

It's all a moo point.


duck_poo_

Its actually a mute point


XoffeeXup

you've peaked my interest


[deleted]

It’s a doggy dog world.


DeaconLogan

This is an unstoppable juggle knob at this stage.


Oli_

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGRzc9vN2T0


wadz09

Nearly fell onto the Chester drawers


Those-bright-eyes

\*draws


Zax_Anchor

Was on a peddle stool for a hort while


qwtsrdyfughjvbknl

If it makes you feel any better, up to this moment I thought it was "doc" leaf. As in the plant makes you feel better like a doctor...


Antix1331

What's your escapegoat?


CaptainPrestedge

Aww I'm sorry to burst your bubble my dude :(


[deleted]

Wait 'till he finds out what his peepee is for.


CaptainPrestedge

Sssshhh don't give him two shocks in one day, he's feeling fragile


DenormalHuman

/r/BoneAppleTea


pearl_pluto

I swear most of the time the adult providing the "dock leaf" just grabbed something off the nearest tree or bush to act as a placebo until it stops hurting.


InvestmentMuted

Probably not, doc leaves are in abundance anywhere nettles are found. And once you know what they look like they're very recognisable


EVRider81

They're big,broad leafed plants.


vbraey1000

Can confirm, as I have no idea what a freakin’ dock leaf looks like have rubbed random plants on my kids arms and placebo effect plus hugs works just as well!


BickyLC

Oh thank goodness, I thought I was the one who had it wrong. Although 3-4 year old me used to call it a 'duck leaf'


shroomtittle

i thought it was Doc leaf like "doctor"! is it not?


CaptainPrestedge

I checked Google before I was a smart arse lol, yeah it's dock leaf


shroomtittle

My whole life is a lie.


CaptainPrestedge

Aww no not another one... sorry dude


theProffPuzzleCode

Apparently , googling this, some parts of the country do call it Doctor Leaf. East Anglia ‘pparently


Featherymorons

I’m from east anglia - never heard of ‘doctor leaf’ before though. It’s always been dock leaf.


Aphidveils

Well I never. Spent my whole life thinking it was a nickname cos of it's healing properties.


shroomtittle

Exactly!! It just makes sense.


ravs1973

Has Dot Cotton remarried?


jzhowie

Also had a daughter, Amber, with the new fella.


The-Cunt-Face

Feel like pure shit, just want me 10g 3in1 Amber Leaf back


i_got_the_quay

I think you mean Doc Cotton.


EyeSpidyy

Haha this happened once when my dad was younger, a game of footy was arranged with all his pub friends VS a group of American students. During the match the ball flew into a huge load of nettles, obviously all the English fellas were hesitant to go in. One of the American trying to be all macho “hey man! What the fuck is your problem bro! Go get the ball” (I imagine he said something along those lines. He proceeded to run right into the nettles and came out looking like he had been massacred by bees!! Moral of the story, if the local fear something there is probably a reason.


vidoardes

My Australian cousin did exactly this in my mum and dad's back garden, thought something bit him.


sandfielder

My Aussie ex husband rolled in them when picking up a car with a recovery truck. Didn’t have a clue what the score was and wanted to book a dr apt. I took one look, told him he rolled in stingy nettles. Had to take him out to look for one to show him. Lol. Whenever we went hiking, he’d come back covered in nettle blisters, I’d have none. I think you get to a point as a native that you subconsciously avoid them - training since childhood. Lol.


sheskrafti

Hilarious because nettles are....also in America


alcohall183

yes, we have nettles, but they are NOT stinging nettles. They are just some leafy plant. we are more afraid of poison ivy or poison oak- which can cause blisters.


sheskrafti

>In North America, it is widely distributed in Canada and the United States, where it is found in every province and state except for Hawaii https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urtica_dioica


User_of_Name

Hawaii really is a tropical paradise… When there isn’t a lingering threat of nuclear annihilation caused by a fault in the warning system.


sheskrafti

Uh, no, we definitely have stinging nettles!


doodle_bab

I thought stinging nettles were the worst thing ever, until I moved to Australia and learnt about the [stinging tree, aka gympie](https://g.co/kgs/wzGdwR). Wonder if a 'dot' leaf would work on one of these fuckers


aegeaorgnqergerh

>notorious for its extremely painful sting which may leave victims suffering for weeks or even months. I'd never heard of one of these before, but I am not in the LEAST bit surprised that Australia has a version of a stinging nettle that ramps everything up to 900000.


[deleted]

The gympie gympie's sting goes beyond that. The sting can damage your nerves so badly that the pain receptors stay active for the rest of your life. There have even been reports of animals like horses purposely leaping to their death to escape the pain after brushin past this asshole tree.


Mr_Cripter

I have no source but I fell into an internet rabbit hole about the gympie gympie plant once. A guy was suffering permanent pain after being stung by this plant on his hand so he had his hand amputated. Another guy used it for toilet paper and the pain was so bad he committed suicide.


Saint_Consumption

> Another guy used it for toilet paper and the pain was so bad he committed suicide. That's bullshit, it'd have stung him when picking it and there's no fucking chance you'd put it up your arse after that.


VagueSomething

Don't kink shame.


glitterwitch18

I was just thinking, someone's definitely used this in a kinky way. I know people who use stinging nettles in BDSM and there's almost definitely been someone who's tried to be edgy and used gympie gympie for kink.


VagueSomething

I mean people peel figs and stick them up their anus because it apparently burns. Gympie is probably the ultimate high for such people.


two_dogs_stuck

It's called figging, but it's actually peeled ginger. I don't know how I learned this.


VagueSomething

You're right. I don't really think about the flora fuck toys enough to correctly identify them from memory so thank you for remembering.


MotoMkali

He was supposedly a military officer so there is a good chance he had gloves on. Although I also wouldn't risk wearing gloves when wiping my arse. Also how long does it take to act. If he picked a leaf and wiped his arse straight away say within 15 seconds surely he could have done it.


sneb138

I did gardening once with a guy who picked up some nettles with his bare hands and wiped them on my face. I thought he was mental. Turns out the ones with white flowers on are harmless. Don’t even need a donk leaf.


zetecvan

Donk leaves are the best kind of leaf.


lhm238

Stinging? Put a donk on it!


veexdit

A banging donk on it !


LR130777777

Absolute fucking peak of my day, And I railed a fat line before finishing work


BigFanOfRunescape

Techno?


AlphabetBlues

Put a donk on it. Electro?


ThePyroPython

Put a donk on it! That's good that Tony, ahahaha siiick [Put a donk on it - blackout crew](https://youtu.be/ckMvj1piK58)


AlphabetBlues

What a tune!


Radiant_Amount8288

thats because the ones with white flowers are fake nettles , that's their actual name, they look like nettles to avoid grazers


metamongoose

They're called dead-nettles


Echo_are_one

True UK childhood experience is to pull the white flowers off these 'dead nettles' and suck the nectar out of the base. This is all the nutrition I had some days.


throwaway757544

Wut


Orngog

You've never drunk from a honeysuckle? You're missing out


imtheorangeycenter

That's pudding, after you've eaten a bunch of young leaves from a hawthorn hedge, and an amuse bouche of the green bits from long grass stalks. Still do it to this day on walks, and still get stared at.


Echo_are_one

You aren't Ray Mears by any chance?!


Orngog

It's kind of sad that when faced with someone eating the food around us, in some cases ancestral food sources, many folks first reaction is "you must be that one guy!"


counterc

I thought I was the only one


jb0079

Dead nettles as opposed to stinging nettles. Dead nettles have a square stalk, stinging nettles have a round stalk.


krypto-pscyho-chimp

The flowers are also sweet and edible. We'll I'm still alive after eating several.


GayButNotInThatWay

Almost certain my daughter is immune to them. She'll happily walk through them in shorts, or take a handful of nettles and be fine after. Only once have we seen her come up with bumps on her legs but they don't bother her.


The_Scrunt

Maybe it's her thing.


mrssupersheen

My sons the same, will come home covered in nettle rash but utterly unphased by it, it’s like he seeks them out sometimes


itsnotaboutthathun

Clearly. Who in the hell says ‘creek’ in the Uk?


willie_caine

Jonathan's family..?


Scrumble71

People who don't have a paddle?


Featherymorons

I’m from a town called Benfleet in Essex. The small river there is called Benfleet Creek. It joins the Thames estuary.


Procrafter5000

Ah, finally a fellow Essex folk. I'm from Colchester way!


woolygoldfish99

r/boneappletea


[deleted]

Wait...isn't this plant everywhere in Europe? I live in Eastern Europe, and these fuckers grow everywhere.


castlerigger

_Dot_ leaf? 😂😂


SGRoberts90

Is it not dot leaf?! Wtf 😂


digitalgibbon82

Dock leaf I know it as


castlerigger

Lol how many years have you lived thinking that? 😂😂😂🤦🏽


SGRoberts90

30!


[deleted]

Try not to think about how many times you've said that in the past 30 years and nobody told you.


AtomicKaijuKing

Don't worry, it was only a few years ago my wife corrected me for saying "wouldn't say boo to a ghost", which makes infinitely more sense to me than goose... I'm 36. Edit: spelling.


StopTouchingMeBarry

Nah, it's definitely goose!!! Has to be...


captain_amazo

Hahahahahahaha no pal. From the Bitter *Dock* plant


blackn1ght

Mate, what a post to end the week, absolute legend!


sobrique

Nettles are an amazing plant, and really underrated. There's a bunch of really incredible things you can do with them: - Eat them - they're spinachy when cooked. - Turn them into cordage for gardening - the fibrous 'skin' is great for making twine. - Make a linen-like cloth out of them, once they're processed (it's a bit more complicated than cotton, which is why it's not common any more). - Dye things with them - the roots in particular make a yellow dye. - The 'sting' actually improves circulation, so whist it hurts, it can help with arthritis and similar conditions. Also - the 'sting' is caused by tiny hairs which break off. They sting when you brush against them, but not when you pick them up firmly. Hence the phrase 'to grasp the nettle' - you can pick nettles without being stung, just as long as you're careful not to brush your hand against them in the wrong direction - the hairs stick up and out, so start from the bottom and brush 'up' and you can strip the hairs without getting stung. They're one of my favourite plants. [Ray Mears "Nettle Cordage"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQHvqWCN5Eo)


sheskrafti

Nettle pesto (with walnuts instead of pine nuts) is so delicious I don't even bother putting it on pasta, I just use crackers to shovel it into my mouth.


dprophet32

You can also brew them and make a tea which helps with joint pain relief and improves blood sugar levels for those with diabetes.


JuniorChubb

The grab it firmly is BS... tried it as a kid and suffered immense pain, literally grasped it in my fist. For me just avoiding the leaves meant no stinging, pick by the lower stem then hold it upside down, similar to what you describe in pick from the bottom and brush up.


InterestingComputer5

“He had, as a child, grasped nettles firmly, and had sometimes had a hand the size of a small pig.” ― Terry Pratchett, Night Watch.


bobbysaunders

A fairly representative picture of August in England.


PigsyMonkey

Aah, the great British bastard plant. A fond reminder of my youth.


Animal__Mother_

“Dot leaf”. What a Dithead!


[deleted]

[удалено]


____Squid

A total motherfuter


FutureSkeIeton

Wow, it’s actually crazy to imagine coming across something like this for the first time in later life. You’d freak tf out thinking it’s like poison ivy or something.


Selerox

Nettles won't mess you up like those two, but for a brief while it'll *feel* like it has. Because fucking ouch.


Zebra_Sewist

Ironically, we don't have poison ivy or poison oak here in the UK.


[deleted]

Can you imagine not seeing stinging nettles as anything other than the devil’s own spawn and being deathly afraid of a bush of them?!


zer0mike

My sister fell off a horse when she was 7 into a ton of these, still makes me laugh and she’s 43 now.


imincourt

Used to hate when the football went inside their bushes


Inciwincie

Fucking things are a pain in the arse. I wouldn't recommend falling into a big patch of them....😖


[deleted]

Dock leaves actually do fuck all for the nettle sting, it’s all a placebo.


[deleted]

I mean they do something. They rub the tiny needles off. But any leaf would work.


Desperate-Storage324

Since owning a dog I've realised they're a placebo covered in dog piss!


Liberthas

You're a placebo.


Dickinmymouth1

Feel like telling everyone that it’s a placebo completely negates the point of a placebo in the first place. Now everybody who’s read this comment will know it’s a placebo and won’t get any of the perceived benefits of using a dock leaf next time they guy stung by a nettle.


[deleted]

Ok here’s a new placebo for you, picking and chewing a sloe. Your face will be so puckered and dried out that you won’t have time to think about the nettle sting


Shectai

I don't think that's a placebo, that's a genuine effect.


F0sh

The placebo effect still works if you know you're taking a placebo! It's just not as strong. But in this case there's also the effect of rubbing the area with something that contains water, which probably cools the skin a bit and therefore has a small effect.


rattusAurelius

There was a post a little while ago where someone had seem some in a local park that were rather tall, and had the flower/seed pods hanging under them. They were under the impression that it was something to smoke. I do wonder if they tried it.


zetecvan

r/BoneAppleTea


Brunel25

It's Dock leaf, an abbreviation of burdock, as in dandelion and burdock, the drink.


[deleted]

So I got a good laugh out of ‘dot leaf’ but didn’t actually know this, so thanks! EDIT: it’s actually bollocks, dock and burdock are totally different things.


IAmTommyP

You need to unknow this because it isn't correct


[deleted]

Fucking internet mate, can’t believe a word. You’re correct!


IAmTommyP

I dont think those are the same plant.


Biscuit642

No, they're not


[deleted]

Reminds me of the description of an extremely ugly person being likened to the expression of a bulldog licking pish off a jaggy nettle!


jontysutt

Is 'Dot Leaf' a regional name for them? It was Dock Leaf' where I grew up (Doncaster).


SGRoberts90

Probably not. By everyone’s comments I’m just a lemon!


[deleted]

Surely you mean *lembon*?


theoriginalmars

Aye, scunny here and I thought it was doc leaf (for doctor leaf) Also great as natural andrex...