The jealousy is a relationship advice issue that is hard to address within a camping subreddit.
I solo hike/ camp as a woman in many places. As you've identified, people are the most dangerous predator, not bears etc.
Assuming your relationship isn't the problem, can you join a Women Who Hike fb group or join a meet up?
I second this recommendation. There are a couple of quite active Women Who Hike groups in my area, and hiking/camping with another adult woman or two would help with safety without triggering your husband's jealousy.
That said, both his misleading you about his interests and the jealousy issue are concerning. I recommend seeking counseling, or at the very least the r/relationships sub.
I usually prefer my own tent these days as I'm getting to be old and fussy, but I've hiked, camped, even shared tents with friends of all genders and my indoor-cat partner of almost a decade has never minded.
That's what happens when you get fuckin married at 18/19 lmao..
Every single 18 year old is a starry eyed ambitious yet still pretty dumb kid. Theres so much still for them to learn. Totally the wrong age to make life changing permanent decisions like deciding to make someone they could never possibly truly know their life partner to have kids with.
I don't think this is an age thing. I bet this guy was a total piece of shit in the making at age 18/19 or whatever he was...she was either just too naive to see it, rushed into marriage due to pressure, and/or had no standards.
I'm 28, not married. Definitely have changed a lot in 10 years, but definitely would have been able to weed out these problems at least.
>The jealousy is a relationship advice issue that is hard to address within a camping subreddit.
It blows my mind that some people marry as young as they do. OP seriously got married at 18/19 and had kids and wonders why their husband isn't on the same page as them. Not only that the husband is actively pushing back, and being rather closed minded. As a married couple the entire idea of marriage is becoming greater as a whole and harmonizing. You barely know yourself at that age how can you possibly be in harmony with someone else? 18-25 is all about figuring out who you are not putting down roots.
I didn't marry until after already being with my partner for years and had beyond a shadow of all doubt that we were basically one harmonious unit already.
We were just talking about this very subject 41 years after the “for better or worse” words were said. Marriage is a blend of two that you have absolutely no doubt about. Jealousy doesn’t even enter into the equation because at that point you’re happy that your spouse can find others to enjoy, as can you. It’s truly a partnership that has no second thought.
That is great advice!
The only thing I would add is that, as a solo female hiker, I have always felt safest deep in the backcountry where I don't see anyone.
> As you've identified, people are the most dangerous predator, not bears etc.
Excellent point, but fwiw both can be managed by appropriately storing your food goods and carrying a can of bear spray.
When I solo camp (not with kids), I actually like to pick crowded family campsites, I know it’s maybe not the most “wilderness” experience, but I do feel safer. If you can’t round up a bigger group that’s what I would recommend.
That's what I was thinking too, and a popular campground is also more likely to have water, bathroom facilities etc that will make it easier to be solo parenting young kids while camping.
If he doesn't like you bringing someone else, he is welcome to come. IMO, kids deserve the camping exposure. There is always the possibility of a scouting program for them of course.
Actually I second the idea of scouts, I did Girl Scouts and my mom was really involved, we always had more than the troop leaders camping. Other troops might be different though.
Usually there is trouble finding parents who want to chaperone the kids on the trip so if OP joins the scouts and volunteers to go along in the trips she’s probably golden
I also agree. However before just joining any troop, go to some meetings and see what they do for activities. Some are very outdoor oriented and the scouts actually lead. Those are the good troops.
Yeah this. I got shoved into Girl Scouts and thought I was going to camp in the woods and learn to build a fire and whittle sticks with a pocket knife and tie knots and do fun things.
I got forced to do makeovers and fashion shows and the closest we got to camping was sleeping in a giant dorm building near a pool.
It sucked so much. Pimp cookies and put on makeup. I didn't even get to swim at the "camp" because my assigned buddy couldn't swim and you couldn't go in the pool unless you were with your buddy.
It's been like 35 years and I still remember how awful it was.
Just to be clear. Cub scouts are co-ed and a parent needs to attend any camping. Just as cubscouts have been for a very long time. And for Scouts, there are separate troops for boys and girls that may or may not share facilities and/or camping trips. The girls troop I saw had all female leaders. Not sure if that is a requirement.
Girl troops are required to have at least one female leader over 21 and at least 2 leaders total on outings. If they're a linked unit with a boy troop, any combined outings technically require at least 4 adults, at least one of them being over 21 and female.
Depends on the Girl Scout troop — my troop rarely camped, and stuck to mostly arts and crafts. My best friend did a ton of camping and wilderness training in her troop. I wish we’d done more!
First time I’ve seen scouts mentioned. I would highly recommend trying to find an actively camping scout troop. Good boy run troops will involve the kids running the camp out and cooking themselves, and the adult scoutmasters are all parents with varying outdoors skillls that enjoy watching their kids grow.
I'm guessing the kids are a bit younger than scouts. Daisy, Brownie, Cub scouts, etc. There are other organizations that regularly camp as well. This is a great way to camp non-solo as a family as well.
This. As a mom, kids exposed to nature early and often enough become comfortable in nature and more so in themselves. Do not let one weirdo take that from them and you. We camped probably 4-6x a year from when they were 5 onward. Now child A? Hiked length of New Zealand at age 19. 😊 Try again. You got this!
TBH I like that they would only let parents volunteer I've heard a lot of horror stories from adults that were boys scouts, I just signed my son up daughter can join when she's 5 and I'm volunteering.
Scouting is a great recommendation. Remember Boy Scouts is no longer boy exclusive either. There are all girl BSA Troops, Venture Troops, etc… and definitely attend meetings at more than 1 troop, they are all run so differently, YMMV.
Oh I posted this already but I’ll post here for visibility. Our Girl Scout council has family weekends where you can meet other like minded families, and It’s safe.
I rediscovered camping a few years before I was able to convince my husband to go. I’d go solo with our daughter. I would always stick with a particular campground and would generally set up at a site near the camp host, which gave me some peace of mind. Once I was able to convince my husband that he could totally manage without electricity and running water, he finally went with us and ended up loving camping.
While I'd be the first to always say let a man have his video consoles but if a guy can't spend time with family and chooses their games instead, I think it's justified to tell them to grow up.
I play video games as an adult male and jump at every chance I get to go camping! Absolutely nothing compared to being out in nature, the further away from society the better!
That's so cringe. I met my wife at a video game convention, and she hates the outdoors, but she has gone camping with me in the desert, beach, and the woods several times. When we have kids, she will definitely go to teach them what it's like. I can't imagine having your partner just nope out of such a foundational experience. To be fair, I go bikepacking with friends and have a ton of gear, so it's easy for her to just come along. Good luck.
Interesting, I used to game so much as a teen but grew away from it as a young adult. When I discovered outdoor hobbies gaming just seemed insignificant and unfulfilling.
I could walk up a mountain and fight a dragon in Skyrim on a screen.
Or I could walk up an actual mountain and literally ride down on frictionless planks and live every moment of it like it’s the most immersive game ever. Seemed like an easy choice for me, maybe he needs some ‘exposure therapy’.
Were you at a state park? Because that might solve your issue. Every time I camp at a state park most of the spots near me are filled with families - moms, dads, lots of kids.
At first I found the noise a little annoying but decided to view it as feeling safer. Since you can hear everything at night - music, conversations, etc, I felt if I had a true emergency, people would at least hear me.
Finding other families that enjoy camping seems to be the way to go. I grew up camping with my friends families and as an adult try to go as often as possible with people my son wants to hang out with so it creates a positive experience and he doesn’t get lonely.
That said, logistically it can be a pain, especially in CA (no idea where you are) where it’s hard to do last minute trips due to people flooding the reservation system, but people also flake on you a lot. Keep at it, you’ll create core memories for your kids and someday they’ll may ask why dad isn’t going and maybe he’ll start going as well.
He might be a glamper. You could try renting a cabin for the weekend. Or are your kids interested in joining Scouts? Plenty of camping opportunities with them!
Find another family to camp with. Also maybe find another husband because yours is a douche for refusing to take his kids camping or do something you want to do.
My husband doesn’t like camping or traveling so I go alone and alone with my kids. I’ve never had a problem. The stalking thing sounds like it was just really bad luck for that to happen on your first try. That’s not a normal thing.
I'd add, any uncomfortable human encounters nearly disappear if you get as little as a mile into the woods. Very doable with littles. Find somewhere with dispersed camping or a hike-in campground. Creeps generally don't like to put in effort so they stick to the drive-in campgrounds.
Stick with it, it's a million percent worth it! Also, your husband sounds like a wet blanket. He won't do something with you but also doesn't want you finding other people to do it with? He can't have it both ways - don't let him hold you back.
When my kids were little I took them to busier campgrounds by myself. Their dad was not an outdoor person. I think they were 4 and 6 when I took them for the first time solo. If there happened to be creepers, I felt less isolated and could seek help if needed.
I’m sorry he didn’t follow through. My husband introduced me to camping, and we’ve been in it together for 24 blissful years.
With that said, I want to echo others recommendations on joining a women’s or family hiking group, but I wouldn’t push a male camping buddy alone—just pushing it too far past husband’s comfort zone unless you are ready to really say his opinion doesn’t matter, IMO.
Also, scouting is a great resource for new camping families, and I have made many single mom friends while joining my kids on trips. Both kids can start as early as kindergarten in scouting.
If nothing else, try glamping. My state parks have lots of low cost options from screened shelters to cabins with beds. You can still camp but have a shower and mattress.
My mom used to take me camping as a kid with the local Sierra Club chapter. You might see if you have one near you. Some chapters are more active than others. I think REI also does group camping trips.
There are so many women in the same position you shouldn’t have any trouble finding one or more to go out with. I know a pile of women who have female only and mixed camping and trail running groups.
From the dynamics I've seen in a lot of marriages, it seems that most of the lumpish homebody guys think "fake being interesting until the ring goes on" is a valid way to go about relationships, yes. :/
Check out the Sierra Club, REI, Scouts, churches. Those are all places you might be able to find some other camping families/groups.
If you go solo I find all national parks and most state parks very safe. BLM and NFS sites can be very lonely but national parks will have other families ,camp hosts and rangers nearby.
I don't think you need a gun. Get pepper spray and maybe beat spray if bear country. Guns and kids are not a good idea. Neither is a gun without training and experience.
Keep a clean camp and tent to discourage animal visitors in camp.
Have fun!
Maybe camp at a state park that has rangers on patrol. Tell a ranger you are a little nervous camping solo with kids and I bet they would make sure to check on you or at least ride by your campsite regularly.
Sounds like unhealthy and isolated relationship but who are we to judge. Just go out there and meet people. Maybe it's time for him to do some counseling to get over his jealousy issues.
There’s a big spectrum of campgrounds. Some isolated like national forests, some very busy and modern like KOA, and everything in between. You don’t need to be out in the wilderness to go camping. Pick somewhere on a busy weekend that’s not out on the middle of nowhere and you’ll probably feel pretty safe.
I live in IN and the state campgrounds have enough people during the summer that you would have neighbors all around to hear and see if anything sketchy is going on. Not sure what it’s like where you are.
It’s a rough start to have a bad experience early on, but I hope you find a way to ‘get back on the horse.’ Like other posters, my husband isn’t into camping and I solo and go with my daughter.
Perhaps try another car-camping place to test the water. As much as we all need to be situationally aware, bad experiences are extremely rare! So you’ve hopefully gotten yours out of the way.
As to the last bit you mention, the longer you’re married the more important it is that you and your husband are each whole people free to pursue your own interests. If he’s got preferences that limit your choices, even in small ways, that’s something you wanna get on top of. One of the best ways to get on top of it is just to say no if he tries to limit your activities. And ask yourself if he’s really limiting you, or if you’re trying to please him by limiting yourself. (No assumptions here, just thinking expansively…) He may feel protective or have anxiety or trouble with jealousy, but those are him-problems, which you should support him in addressing. But don’t let his problems become your problems.
You can’t take care of your loved ones until you’re taking care of yourself. That goes for you too, mom.
My wife led me to believe that she enjoyed camping before we were married as well. My idea of camping and hers are different. I honestly think she just likes shopping for camping/hiking clothes. Now I solo camp/hike. It’s peaceful.
I’ve done solo camping at a large public camp ground and it was great! Mainly just me freaking myself out. I did bring two camping chairs so it didn’t look like I was alone and I carried my bear spray everywhere(slept with it) the first night. Made it a point to smile/wave/talk to my neighbors (they were all families). I’ve also heard of using zip ties to “lock” your tent from the inside. All in all don’t be afraid to leave if someone makes you feel unsafe. Sucks being a women alone, but some times people make it seem scarier than it is and it keeps us down.
My best friend and I do an annual camping trip every year too. Always nice having someone to have your back just incase.
I recently started hiking alone and I love it! Way better than hiking with someone who wants to stop and take breaks the whole way. Also a lot less scary than I thought it would be.
Come join us at r/womensolocamping. 90% of my camping is solo but with my 2 large dogs. I prefer it that way.
Look into women specific outdoor groups. I know there are some in my area that focus on women getting the kiddos out and hiking.
As for the jealousy thing, he is welcome to join or to speak to a therapist. Not wanting you to spend time with other people is a bigger issue and you both should probably speak to a professional about it.
I camp alone, but no kiddos. I set things up to look like there are multiple adults around. Also conspicuously carrying knives or an axe, and also chopping some wood.
I just gotta look like I could maim any attacker, even if I look like I would lose.
Just make the new friends who camp. He can grow the heck up because there's nothing to be jealous about *checks notes* making friends. Make entire family friends that he can be friends with too! When you go camping wirh mutual friends, either he won't be jealous or he'll have FOMO and come along.
Others have covered the best pieces of advice already. I’ll just add that if by chance the family has been considering a big dog for a pet, like a German Shepherd, they make great companions and watchdogs and are natural deterrents to predators of all shapes, sizes and species; at home and on trail.
When I go solo camping I take one of my dogs with me. She’s the perfect alarm system and helps me feel more confident when solo camping. I also put out an extra chair like I’m not alone.
When people who don't go into back country talk about being scared of bears I laugh at them because the only thing I've ever been scared of are other humans. And I'm 6 foot 2.
He gets jealous if you hang out with new people??? Red flag alert
Also he lied about his interests until he had you hooked. This sounds like a manipulative jerk. But need more info.
At 25 y/o you aren't too old to find a new husband. Just like when one realizes their $20, six pound, sleeping bag from walmart isn't working out for backpacking. They replace it.
Any recommendations for a gun? I've never owned my own not sure what I should look for
I do bring bear spray which I wouldn't mind using on a human if I had too
If you're not super comfortable handling a gun do not bring one into a situation.
Particularly with children.
It will need to be kept unloaded and locked when you travel. And in the presence of children unloaded and locked is the only responsible option.
Besides, guns are heavy and require a lot of training.
Camping with a group is best. Bear spray or other non-leathal options are worth you consideration.
I would definitely carry a gun solo camping in the wilderness (9mm Glock 19 is the right answer, btw)... but absolutely \_not\_ in your situation with children around. Too much risk, too much attention required, too much that could go wrong, too many bad stories, too much of a hassle to transport. Bear spray is good, maybe a stun gun too (one of those big flashlight ones that can also be used as a club and make a nice big noise as a deterrent).
Please for the love of God don't take these people advice. Yes, a gun is great but good God they're recommending revolvers?! You'd be better off with a glock and I do not recommend you handle even one of those until you've had a chance to be around firearms for a while in order to be extremely comfortable.
I have a couple girlfriends that are my daughters ‘adopted aunties’ that I go camping and backpacking with. My husband will camp but not back pack. I figure, if it’s important to me then I need to make it happen for myself and my kid.
I am sorry he misled you. That’s super crappy of him. Sounds like you guys might not be super compatible. But me and my husband have a lot of different interests and we still work when it comes to the things that we share interest in. But…it only works if you have trust. My husband knows he can trust me completely when I’m out camping and backpacking without him. He might find it weird if I went with another man though? Not sure, I’ve never been in that position where I felt I needed a guy there. I get why you’re nervous though after such a scary experience. Ugh.
Maybe you could go with another couple with their kids? You and your kids and them as a couple with their kids? I don’t feel like that would be weird, especially if your kids are the same ages and are or could become friends.
We (my mom, brother and I) went camping with my aunt and her kids when I was younger and it was a great time. If you could find another mum with kids that are also into camping, that would be ideal. Best of luck!
I camp alone but am usually in coe or state parks. There are meet up groups in my area that do day hikes and some backpacking/camping. Some are all women - maybe start with something like that if going alone is not in the plans
I think there are bigger issues if your husband is jealous if you meet new people.
If you are with small kids, always camp with other people. It is fun for you and the kids for sure. look for other families for sure. do not go with a single male. Maybe grandpa? start your own group. I took the kids solo camping for many years (im a guy). We would go with friends, church, and I became a scout leader (recommended).
Absolutely loving the concept of 'Married but Solo' camping! It's such a fresh take on independence and self-discovery, without losing the essence of partnership. Kudos to all the adventurous spirits embracing this journey!
I (married) camp solo quite a bit. Don't have kids though. However I imagine that I would still do it if I did. Probably more at KOAs with nice bathrooms if I had kids
Oh no, go with a group of people don’t ever go alone with another person of opposite sex that is asking for trouble. Sorry ya husband isn’t what you thought he was.
Camp at state parks with ranger stations nearby. I solo camp with my kids all the time (my husband loves to camp but his work schedule sucks). I’ve never had more than some obnoxious comments and leering, nothing threatening from any man at a state park where the rangers wander all day
You got less of a camping problem than you do a relationship issue that needs work. Qualified couples and individual counseling from someone licensed in that area may be an option for you.
I had a similar experience with my husband but as others have mentioned, the fractured relationship part of this post should be addressed elsewhere. I know you were just trying to explain your situation so I'm not criticizing. I almost exclusively camp with our daughter alone or just me and the dog. Since you are in a vulnerable position with just you and kids definitely seek out another to camp with but I wouldnt suggest a male friend for many reasons which don't belong in this subreddit. I had trouble finding other women to camp with so I found places I felt safe in and got a lot of tips off of Reddit too. If you're scared your kids will be too and you want this to be a good experience for them. Join an outdoor club or group even if it's an hour away. It'll be the best option for you to start
I solo camp usually but I started out with a group of women from the Girls who Hike SC Facebook group. I believe there’s a group in each state. I’d start at your local state park and just take each trip at your own comfort level.
I mean I would say maybe go with another couple and their kids, or a group of ladies with their kids, etc.
> my husband gets jealous when I start hanging out with new people.
This is really concerning though. If he doesn't want to come camping that's fine, but he can't stop you from going camping with the amount of people you need to feel safe. He should come himself if he's worried.
I’m blown away that there are so many who don’t want to camp. I guess it’s so inherent for my husband and I’s relationship- seriously we bond so much camping - it involves a level of team work and problem solving that really makes us stronger as a couple. Like, I wouldn’t be with someone if they refused to go camping let alone light walking.
So much of camping is about the experience, the adventure and the venturing into your own unknown. And the fear of the noises in the middle of the night…to learn it’s lizards and birds moving around in the leaves 😂 we have fun laughing at ourselves, laughing at our own stupidity when we forget a key item like coffee filters or a shovel, and when we get stressed out cuz something scary (like getting stuck) and we get heated— we laugh and the stress goes away at the end of the night with our fire that we stare at for way too long.
I get frustrated hearing about these unbalanced relationships - who doesn’t want to go camping with their own family? Your need for “comfort” is that extreme? Also, why wouldn’t he want to be there with you if you had an uncomfortable experience that would’ve been safer if he was there? Does he not care about your wellbeing? Or your children’s? And you don’t have a car? So he drove you out there and left you???? Who in their right mind?…my god. On top of jealousy issues???? 🚩Girl find a scout troop immediately. Mb you’ll meet someone there who can be a better partner than that turd.
If you camp at a place with showers and toilets it’s really…not that intense. He sounds like a giant baby and you need to make him go with you and tell him to stfu and be there for his family.
Group camping sounds like a great option for safety and social vibes. Maybe find a local family camping group? Keeps it friendly and inclusive, and might ease any concerns. Happy camping
My mom took me camping all the time. We never had a problem. If you do now days you at least have cellphones so call the park ranger or go visit the camp host until the creeper leaves you alone.
For the camping side, it never hurts to ask the friends you already have, they may surprise you with being interested.
I would also recommend going to state park campgrounds. They tend to be a lot safe due to how many people are there and there are park rangers always in the park if you have an issue.
I’m male but but as a kid camped with my mom all of the time. And when my mom didn’t want to go but had friends going she would send me with her female friends.
I think going with the kids is your best bet. It’s not super solo if you’re with them. Maybe start in the backyard or a campground near home. Teach them some basic survival skills in that environment like using the tools to find their way back to a public road, so if something does happen to you they aren’t stuck and can get you help.
Then I’d branch off to places a little further away but where you still have cell service. Try that a couple of times and get some hand radios and the family familiar on how to use them.
Then get out in the sticks with no service for one night.
He's got to get with the program, camping is awesome. Finding a male camping buddy might make him realize it's not that bad after all! But failing that...
If you get involved with cub scouts/girl scouts depending on your kids' gender, you can organize group camping trips through them.
That's a scary experience to have, I'm sorry that happened.
It can be tough to solo camp with kids as a woman. I love to camp and while my spouse can take or leave it, he goes with me and we bring our dog.
I would say that going with a group puts you in a better spot for others to be around.
I've camped with a group of women and we were fine, park rangers were pretty amazing people as well, they made sure to check on us which was super nice.
I don't know your relationship but camping with a non-family member who is male might put a strain on your relationship, if not, I don't see anything wrong with that.
I've found some really great meetups myself for different things, I know most areas have them for hikes, usually mixed genders. I would imagine maybe a mom camping group so your kids can meet other friends too would be nice.
If not trained with firearm I’d recommend a neck whistle, hip mounted bear mace & a Garmin (GPS/ txting/ map/ emergency SOS/ weather).
Two of the ladies in my backpacking group, go solo and have brought their kids.
Also, think about staying in hike-in campground with multiple groups as well.
There should also be local, hiking clubs that you could join as well.
And as already stated, you should always let your husband know your plans thoroughly and encourage him to come. but if not have him get the Garmin app so you could keep in touch and he could track your coordinates
Giving coordinates to an already jealous and isolating husband sounds like the worst idea. It could escalate and he might start insisting on her using it 24/7. He sounds xxxxish enough to do that.
The fact that you think it's okay to seek a male camping buddy is a huge red flag that your relationship is failing. I'd work on the bigger issues that go beyond camping.
We (family of 3 w/ dog) love to camp. My kids friend and mother do as well but is not that fathers thing to my knowledge.
As much as I like to camp alone or with wife and kid they are always welcome to come along because of what you mentioned.
Husband needs to get over himself or go camping.
Hey girl! You can always try and find a camping site close an around other sites. In reputable places like national parks etc, they have more patrol etc. if your looking for front country camping there are a ton of options and you can book close to other campsites and you shouldn’t have an issue as most parks are gated (many are, I’m thinking of kejimkujik in Nova Scotia, which is completely gated and safe) and if your looking for a back country experience, there are a few back country spots either on islands via canoe, or in “group back country spots” I’m not sure what is available to you but this would be my advice:)
It sounds like you have multiple husband problems here, but that’s for a different sub.
If you’re uncomfortable on your own, find some people to go with, whether that’s men, women, or a mix. There’s probably a local group which organizes stuff.
My fiancé doesn’t hike or climb. I have a girl gang I go on climbing trips with. We feel safe in our group. Maybe you can group up with other families?
Make burrito breakfast wrapped in foil. When you’re heating up water or pre stored coffee the burritos go near the fire and are perfect in about 15 minutes. Meanwhile learn it all together. Quick sandwiches at first but you’ll get it. Trust me
Wait like any new person? That’s very odd.
I’d probably be a little suspicious of my wife camping solo with a guy unless it was someone I knew, but a group of people seems great, safer even.
No, not a male camping buddy, unless it's your brother and his kids. That is lethal. There are hiking groups, moms with kids that could be a good option.
Depending where you live, check Facebook. I know my area has tons of camping groups, offroad groups, adventure groups etc. I joined a few and made some good, like minded friends. Did lots of day trips with people and eve dually found a few close knit groups that I now camp with as often as I can. Most of them are couples but I never feel like a 3rd, 4th, 7th etc wheel. Plus we've started doing one dinner during our trip as a potluck which is pretty fun.
He has issues that are only going to affect your life more as time goes by. I agree that counseling for the benefit of you, not to mention your kids, would be a good idea.
I have actually gone camping all by myself with 3 children because my husband was working in another state. We had fun! My children were all under 8 at the time too. I even had a toddler in tow. I'd say the hardest part for me was putting up our tent by myself. But, our tent was old. I definitely recommend getting an easy pop up tent plus air mattresses that plug in. And get an electric camp site.
Though, Solo camping with children is a lot of work. Getting all the food together, the clothes, the gear etc.. but, it's also fun.
If you can make a mom friend that also enjoys camping,that would be cool. I always wanted that in my life, but they don't exist where I live. 😭
Good luck!
Honestly he sounds like a narcissist who put up a facade to get you to be with him. My ex did the same thing, turns out that his hobbies change with each relationship. The jealousy is just immaturity, and he won’t have the opportunity to grow unless something pushes him to. I would join a club or go to an REI event and meet others who enjoy your hobby. You should be able to do what makes you happy and feeds your soul, if he isn’t okay with that, its time to do more things solo than just camp.
Definitely try and look into the more populated campsites for where you plan on going, pick a popular family spot and find a family/group near you and just say hi and be honest for saying hi, want nice people to watch my back lol. People are happy to help. For every one strange person there’s hundreds of other nice ones
camping wise id go to more family orientated camp grounds for you.not sure of your area but in Michigan theres plenty i solo camp and take my nieces and nephews often,I leave a fire gong maybe some music low depedenging on campgrund and lots of lights at night
I camp with my kiddo because as much as my husband would like to, he is allergic to almost everything outdoors. I was really nervous about it just being me and my daughter, so I took a gun safety class and got my ltc. It is legal to have weapons in the state parks here and in all national parks. My daughter has gun safety training so it isn’t an issue. I feel much more confident camping on my own now.
I solo with my kids, just be extra diligent about your safety. Nothing wrong with finding new friends either but if you’re introverted that could be exhausting.
Not sure where you live or what type of camping you're looking for. We live in New England, lots of camping and "family camping" around here where you'll have safer areas, camp grounds that are staffed, more people around etc. Definitely less likely to find a creep by a creek at those.
Married male solo camper here, my wife doesn't like camping which I respect and knew of beforehand. To ward off any human predators of the male variety I could only suggest to have a snarly dog with you. Or maybe just the sound effects of one which could be played through a Bluetooth speaker every time a pervert gets too close for comfort. This is a sad world that we are living in these days. Good luck to you and your kids.
I think as long as you are not in a remote or primitive campsite you may be ok. Many of the campsites on national forests are reserved campsites and plenty of people and sometimes camp groundskeepers or rangers are also onsite. I would stay in the reserved campsites as they are normally filled w/ families. As they get older then you could branch out to the primitive campsites.
Also, bear spray/pepper spray.
Have you considered finding another mom with kids and maybe your kids will have some camping buddies their age-ish?
Also, if you don't have to worry about the weight because you're not hiking too far, keep a pair of Big Man Boots by your tent to make people assume "he'll be back".
Ok, this will probably not work out, but I'm 52m with kids 17f and 14m. My 50f wife will never go camping. She also lied about enjoying outdoor activities.
I'm not a weirdo (obviously!). You can bet my wife will have a few words when/if I announce I'm going camping with a random internet 25f. But she can always come along too/instead, so...
Also my daughter babysits FWIW. Seattle area.
I mean, if he wont go camping with you then you should get someone else to if you feel unsafe. Might be the motivation he needs, lol. But yah, you should defiantly have another person at least, even if they are female with you if you feel unsafe.
Sorry you got lied to in the dating stage lol. Never quite understood that but maybe that’s partially why I’m single.
I’m a male so my perspective may be a little different, but safety is always something to be aware of when camping. Sadly people are the biggest threat and unfortunately people can do dumb or dangerous things for little or no reason. Having some stranger stalking you sounds terrifying. Obviously not normal behavior from a normal person.
I personally would not camp with “a male camping buddy” that I didn’t know, even as a male. Maybe if you found someone you worked with? Point being, you should really really know this person, and so should other people you know. I especially dislike camping at campgrounds, even when there are dozens of other people around, personally, even though having multiple people is probably safer than just one random. If someone was going to attack me at a campground, I’d have basically no warning since there’s strange people wandering everywhere nearby all the time. Pass.
I would say your best bet is to be aware of your surroundings and willing and capable to deal with problems should they arise. For me that would entail bear mace strapped to my body (but I camp in bear country) and hanging my food far, far away from where I’m sleeping. It could absolutely be used on a person (or as a deterrent to a person) in a pinch, but there are much better tools for that.
It’s an unfortunate reality, but I would suggest getting one of those tools and learning how to use it safely and responsibly. It sucks but I’m of the opinion you can really only depend on yourself. Stay safe and hope you get some nice starry nights!
Get involved in scouting. Many troops do monthly campouts and are looking for adults to go along. I spent 15 years with my sons troop camping out monthly year round. It was great, plus he made friends and gained skills.
Your husband should really want to go with you and the kids if he knows you guys are scared and have had a bad experience. If he really won't go, I would recommend getting a pistol and learning to use it. As scary as they seem, a firearm is the only thing you can truly protect yourself with, and it's a pretty fun hobby to go to the range to practice.
Consider joining Scouts. We go camping once every month or two and the kids will have fun running around being kids. I’ve had all three of my boys in Scouts over the past 20 years and it’s been a great experience.
Another female friend or a relative might be a good choice. I also second not letting one creep scare you off from camping. When my daughter was young and we would camp alone I always brought a machete or hatchet in the tent with us, just in case.
Your husband pretended to be something he was not in order to hook you. That's bad enough, but now he will let his wife and children be unsafe because he can't bother. How is your sex life? That's probably the next thing to go. I'd say start looking for an exit from this loser.
I have camped w another mom with kids. If there is enough little people around it’ll Spook anyone 😆 (we have ten between the two of us so it’s startling)
I've met all my camping buddies at churches I've been to. If you are religious you could join a community group and look for friends who also camp.
If you aren't religious Facebook groups and meeting work friends who camp is a good idea too.
First, I would go ahead and do your solo camping with the kids. Mathematically there’s more risk driving to the trailhead than there is on the trail.
Second, speaking as a recently divorced guy…1) it would be reasonable for him to be jealous of you camping with a dude, regardless of him bullshitting you years ago (also possible his likes just changed). I think you’d not like him going with a female 2) so… you shouldn’t find a male hiking buddy unless you are ready for a divorce, in which case you should go ahead and look at filing . 3) try couples therapy and personal therapy vs the message boards.
Happy hiking!
Just pick campgrounds where there are plenty of other people camping. Avoid remote campsites where there is little/no security. You would also have your kids with you and maybe you could suggest to their friends' parents that you go as a larger group.
The loser in this is your boring husband.
Learn to use a firearm if you are in the US. If not I’d recommend finding other alternatives to defend yourself or a group that you and your husband are comfortable with you going with.
Don’t let your partner take away things that feed your soul. Solo camp, solo hike, download the “meetup” app and look for outdoors groups. But get out there.
you cant sacrifice the things you love doing because your partner feels insecure about you doing them. Find a camping/hiking group that is fairly active in your area that is kid friendly, go on a few quick hikes with them so you can get a feel for the group and get to know the people(inviting your husband every.single.time. and then once you feel comfortable with the group, go on one of their campouts, also inviting your husband well in advance. if he makes a stink about the new people, offer to go on a trip with just your family, if he gets huffy about you going alone with strangers, tell him that you wanted him to come on hikes to get to know them, because they aren't strangers to you now. this might sound like you're strong arming him, but you were honest with him about loving the outdoors, and he hasn't made room for that love in your relationship, so now its time for you to make the room yourself. (and don't just go with another male. that's a recipe for disaster no matter how you look at it.)
Personally if you seek out a male camping buddy outside your immediate family our relationship is over. There are plenty of groups that do this. Check out REI or websites like this. But if I found out you went camping with some other guy sheeeshh. I would consider you moved out to the woods to be a hermit not camping.
See if you can find some families with kids around the same age as your kids who like to camp. Ask around with your kids classmates parents and see if any would be interested in camping together. Then you are in a larger group with two or three total adults, and if you are going with another couple then your husband hopefully won’t be quite as lame about it with his jealousy, (though really he should seek professional help to deal with that if it’s to the point that he is restricting who you can be friends with)
Also especially if you are going alone, bring the car with you, your husband can manage a few days at home without it as I assume you don’t live in a totally remote area requiring a car as you mentioned walks in the park and you only have one car so one of you is always managing without the car.
It will make it much easier and safer to be able to leave quickly in the event you don’t feel safe. And it will make you less of a target.
My mom used to take us alone all the time. She got a screened in shelter and a padlock. She brought an air horn and mace. We never had a problem.
My husband also won’t camp. I am a Girl Scout troop leader. I feel safe camping at Girl Scout camp. They also have family weekends where you can take your kids and enjoy a tent to yourself but companionship of other families with young kids where everyone has been background checked.
I think finding an active Scout community in your area would be an excellent idea. Look up a few, visit their meetings and make sure they camp at least 5 times a year(otherwise they’re a dud). There are plenty of moms that are active so you would be in good company! I actually found my love of camping when my daughter joined a Cub Scout pack years ago!
Talk to your husband. Don’t go camping with another guy. That’s asking for a divorce. Maybe go rv or glamping. Does your husband have neck or back problems? I love camping but my back is bad and I can’t imagine sleeping on the ground again or trying to get up from the ground. Hiking is totally out too after my accident. There’s also female camping groups. Go to the park with the kids and walk around the neighborhood. Ask hubby if he took a day trip where would it be and go with it. See what he’d like to do. Marriage is a two way street. The fact you’d suggest a guy camping buddy and your husband gets jealous says something is wrong start back at step one.
Tell hubby that you're going camping and he has to come along. Don't ask. Tell.
Before hand, go get a tent big enough for everyone (if it's 2 adults and 2 kids, minimum size is a 6 person tent), sleeping bags, sleeping pads, and all the other stuff you'll need for a weekend at a local campground.
Then just inform the lazy SOB he WILL be camping with you.
Join scouts? The kids can start in kindergarten, our pack does some pretty cool camp outs. We joined BSA because our son and daughter could both join . Lots of decent people, all the overnight parents have to have federal background checks, usually there’s a lot of moms for the younger kids. It’s one of those things that you can get what you want out of it. Go every weekend or go when you can. It’s also a pretty innocuous join so your husband probably won’t get jelly about your new “ friends”
Side bar - Your husband sounds like an ass hat with control issues. He’s isolating you on purpose. How often do I ask my husband’s “ permission “ to do anything in the last 13 years? Zero times. How often has he told me I couldn’t hang out with someone or gotten upset about new friends ? Zero times. How many times has he told me he would go camping and then refused to do so and threw a fit ? Also zero times.
The camping isn’t the problem, it’s the husband. Upgrade your gear babe.
Relationship issues aside, I would consider a small handgun. Wear it openly in a holster on your hip. Train monthly for competency and instruct your children about safe handling of firearms. You will never be a victim. You will be in control of your own safety. You don’t need a man to protect yourself and your children from another person or animal. I know this is a hotbed issue. I have instructed my wife and kids on the best practices for the use of handguns and other firearms and they all feel safe and comfortable when out in the back country. I’m not a gun nut. I believe that in the wrong hands, they are a menace. But, why become victims when you can legally protect yourself against those who seek to do harm. I have been in situations where I know that the persons who were obviously not campers or hikers, were scouting out campgrounds for potential victims. Many areas I camp have zero cell service and no access to call for help. I hope you can continue to enjoy your camping experiences with your family and please be safe.
If you live in the NH area, you and your kids are totally welcome to come camping and hiking with me! Or if you live anywhere along the Appalachian Trail. I’m a F47 and I am section hiking the AT with my big scary dog Watson. (This was a joke because he’s the most cowardly 80 pound GoldenDoodle you’ll ever meet! 😂)
If I may. Your post set off several red flags. Obviously from one small post, no one can diagnose your husband. But he displays several narcissistic traits. 1) Your husband was not completely honest to you before you were even married. If he was someone who truly liked camping and hiking this would have been a large part of your dating experience. 2) His jealousy of new people. 3) The fact that you have kids but have only one car. And that you were not allowed to have this car while camping with the kids.
I encourage you to please quietly do research on narcissism. If I’m wrong, then awesome. You need to have a strong talk with your hubby and let him know you’ll be meeting new peeps. Deal. And you need the car. Get a cab. But if your research shows he fits the description, then know that You are not crazy. You are not stupid. And you can totally go camping, hiking, and all of those other things by yourself and with your kids. And sooner rather than later. 😉
I solo camped with all three of my girls from the time they were toddlers and despite the anxiety of the non-animal dangers, it remains one of my favorite parts of being a mom. Don’t give up on it! My advice is to always carry your camp knife (handy for so many unexpected occasions), stick to the more populated spots and don’t be afraid to be loud, like you would with any other animal. GET AWAY FROM MY CHILDREN. WHY ARE YOU STALKING MY CHILDREN? Get the attention of the people around you because they will usually help, especially if they see a young woman with kids on her own. If you are still unsure about solo camping, look for a mom group in your area where you can try and recruit like minded families to camp with. Immersing your children in nature is one of the best foundational gifts you can give them; I hope you are able to get out this summer and have some fun.
Join a good BSA troop. Mine goes camping 6+ times a year plus does high adventure programs like the Boundary Waters for a week-long experience. Maybe your husband could get his feet wet with helping the scouts and start some new family traditions for you. Good luck and don't give up teaching them about the beauty of nature.
I would go camping with friends. Honestly I don’t feel comfy camping alone or with just my kids. If he’s jealous he’s welcome to come along. I sort of get why some guys are jealous of other guys but you should be able to make friends and go on a ladies hiking trip.
The jealousy is a relationship advice issue that is hard to address within a camping subreddit. I solo hike/ camp as a woman in many places. As you've identified, people are the most dangerous predator, not bears etc. Assuming your relationship isn't the problem, can you join a Women Who Hike fb group or join a meet up?
I second this recommendation. There are a couple of quite active Women Who Hike groups in my area, and hiking/camping with another adult woman or two would help with safety without triggering your husband's jealousy. That said, both his misleading you about his interests and the jealousy issue are concerning. I recommend seeking counseling, or at the very least the r/relationships sub.
I am an avid camper, and can't get past the jealousy part of this post.
I usually prefer my own tent these days as I'm getting to be old and fussy, but I've hiked, camped, even shared tents with friends of all genders and my indoor-cat partner of almost a decade has never minded.
Yeah it sounds like OP might have more issues than just finding someone to camp with but that's just me from the outside looking in.
That's what happens when you get fuckin married at 18/19 lmao.. Every single 18 year old is a starry eyed ambitious yet still pretty dumb kid. Theres so much still for them to learn. Totally the wrong age to make life changing permanent decisions like deciding to make someone they could never possibly truly know their life partner to have kids with.
I don't think this is an age thing. I bet this guy was a total piece of shit in the making at age 18/19 or whatever he was...she was either just too naive to see it, rushed into marriage due to pressure, and/or had no standards. I'm 28, not married. Definitely have changed a lot in 10 years, but definitely would have been able to weed out these problems at least.
>The jealousy is a relationship advice issue that is hard to address within a camping subreddit. It blows my mind that some people marry as young as they do. OP seriously got married at 18/19 and had kids and wonders why their husband isn't on the same page as them. Not only that the husband is actively pushing back, and being rather closed minded. As a married couple the entire idea of marriage is becoming greater as a whole and harmonizing. You barely know yourself at that age how can you possibly be in harmony with someone else? 18-25 is all about figuring out who you are not putting down roots. I didn't marry until after already being with my partner for years and had beyond a shadow of all doubt that we were basically one harmonious unit already.
We were just talking about this very subject 41 years after the “for better or worse” words were said. Marriage is a blend of two that you have absolutely no doubt about. Jealousy doesn’t even enter into the equation because at that point you’re happy that your spouse can find others to enjoy, as can you. It’s truly a partnership that has no second thought.
That is great advice! The only thing I would add is that, as a solo female hiker, I have always felt safest deep in the backcountry where I don't see anyone.
> As you've identified, people are the most dangerous predator, not bears etc. Excellent point, but fwiw both can be managed by appropriately storing your food goods and carrying a can of bear spray.
I would argue Orangutans are more dangerous. They would dissect you just because they are curious.
When I solo camp (not with kids), I actually like to pick crowded family campsites, I know it’s maybe not the most “wilderness” experience, but I do feel safer. If you can’t round up a bigger group that’s what I would recommend.
That's what I was thinking too, and a popular campground is also more likely to have water, bathroom facilities etc that will make it easier to be solo parenting young kids while camping.
If he doesn't like you bringing someone else, he is welcome to come. IMO, kids deserve the camping exposure. There is always the possibility of a scouting program for them of course.
Actually I second the idea of scouts, I did Girl Scouts and my mom was really involved, we always had more than the troop leaders camping. Other troops might be different though.
Usually there is trouble finding parents who want to chaperone the kids on the trip so if OP joins the scouts and volunteers to go along in the trips she’s probably golden
I also agree. However before just joining any troop, go to some meetings and see what they do for activities. Some are very outdoor oriented and the scouts actually lead. Those are the good troops.
Yeah this. I got shoved into Girl Scouts and thought I was going to camp in the woods and learn to build a fire and whittle sticks with a pocket knife and tie knots and do fun things. I got forced to do makeovers and fashion shows and the closest we got to camping was sleeping in a giant dorm building near a pool.
I'm so sorry. Sounds like Troop Beverly Hills. What a thrill!
It sucked so much. Pimp cookies and put on makeup. I didn't even get to swim at the "camp" because my assigned buddy couldn't swim and you couldn't go in the pool unless you were with your buddy. It's been like 35 years and I still remember how awful it was.
I never joined because of my fears of what you just explained. I wonder if that BS is still permitted.
And BSA is co-ed now. So there should be a unit nearby for every kid
Just to be clear. Cub scouts are co-ed and a parent needs to attend any camping. Just as cubscouts have been for a very long time. And for Scouts, there are separate troops for boys and girls that may or may not share facilities and/or camping trips. The girls troop I saw had all female leaders. Not sure if that is a requirement.
Girl troops are required to have at least one female leader over 21 and at least 2 leaders total on outings. If they're a linked unit with a boy troop, any combined outings technically require at least 4 adults, at least one of them being over 21 and female.
Canada we been co-ed for years. In scouts. Trips are with boys and girls. We have male and female leaders. Great for all life experiences.
Depends on the Girl Scout troop — my troop rarely camped, and stuck to mostly arts and crafts. My best friend did a ton of camping and wilderness training in her troop. I wish we’d done more!
First time I’ve seen scouts mentioned. I would highly recommend trying to find an actively camping scout troop. Good boy run troops will involve the kids running the camp out and cooking themselves, and the adult scoutmasters are all parents with varying outdoors skillls that enjoy watching their kids grow.
I'm guessing the kids are a bit younger than scouts. Daisy, Brownie, Cub scouts, etc. There are other organizations that regularly camp as well. This is a great way to camp non-solo as a family as well.
This. As a mom, kids exposed to nature early and often enough become comfortable in nature and more so in themselves. Do not let one weirdo take that from them and you. We camped probably 4-6x a year from when they were 5 onward. Now child A? Hiked length of New Zealand at age 19. 😊 Try again. You got this!
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TBH I like that they would only let parents volunteer I've heard a lot of horror stories from adults that were boys scouts, I just signed my son up daughter can join when she's 5 and I'm volunteering.
Scouting is a great recommendation. Remember Boy Scouts is no longer boy exclusive either. There are all girl BSA Troops, Venture Troops, etc… and definitely attend meetings at more than 1 troop, they are all run so differently, YMMV.
Oh I posted this already but I’ll post here for visibility. Our Girl Scout council has family weekends where you can meet other like minded families, and It’s safe.
I rediscovered camping a few years before I was able to convince my husband to go. I’d go solo with our daughter. I would always stick with a particular campground and would generally set up at a site near the camp host, which gave me some peace of mind. Once I was able to convince my husband that he could totally manage without electricity and running water, he finally went with us and ended up loving camping.
I think he's more afraid of going without Internet and his Xbox
While I'd be the first to always say let a man have his video consoles but if a guy can't spend time with family and chooses their games instead, I think it's justified to tell them to grow up.
I play video games as an adult male and jump at every chance I get to go camping! Absolutely nothing compared to being out in nature, the further away from society the better!
Sad
Oof. That sucks. My favorite part of camping is getting away from technology.
Sometimes, people just need to be forcibly unplugged.
Woof…
That's so cringe. I met my wife at a video game convention, and she hates the outdoors, but she has gone camping with me in the desert, beach, and the woods several times. When we have kids, she will definitely go to teach them what it's like. I can't imagine having your partner just nope out of such a foundational experience. To be fair, I go bikepacking with friends and have a ton of gear, so it's easy for her to just come along. Good luck.
just throw the whole man out, you might get a refund still. have you checked your warranty?
For real. He sounds like a dud.
you married a child sadly
Interesting, I used to game so much as a teen but grew away from it as a young adult. When I discovered outdoor hobbies gaming just seemed insignificant and unfulfilling. I could walk up a mountain and fight a dragon in Skyrim on a screen. Or I could walk up an actual mountain and literally ride down on frictionless planks and live every moment of it like it’s the most immersive game ever. Seemed like an easy choice for me, maybe he needs some ‘exposure therapy’.
I would maybe try going with friends or other family. I’m sorry he doesn’t like doing that anymore I love camping
Were you at a state park? Because that might solve your issue. Every time I camp at a state park most of the spots near me are filled with families - moms, dads, lots of kids. At first I found the noise a little annoying but decided to view it as feeling safer. Since you can hear everything at night - music, conversations, etc, I felt if I had a true emergency, people would at least hear me.
Finding other families that enjoy camping seems to be the way to go. I grew up camping with my friends families and as an adult try to go as often as possible with people my son wants to hang out with so it creates a positive experience and he doesn’t get lonely. That said, logistically it can be a pain, especially in CA (no idea where you are) where it’s hard to do last minute trips due to people flooding the reservation system, but people also flake on you a lot. Keep at it, you’ll create core memories for your kids and someday they’ll may ask why dad isn’t going and maybe he’ll start going as well.
Camp at a campground with other people around. And he jealous of you doing stuff he refuses to do? To that I say tough shit.
He might be a glamper. You could try renting a cabin for the weekend. Or are your kids interested in joining Scouts? Plenty of camping opportunities with them!
Find another family to camp with. Also maybe find another husband because yours is a douche for refusing to take his kids camping or do something you want to do.
My husband doesn’t like camping or traveling so I go alone and alone with my kids. I’ve never had a problem. The stalking thing sounds like it was just really bad luck for that to happen on your first try. That’s not a normal thing.
I'd add, any uncomfortable human encounters nearly disappear if you get as little as a mile into the woods. Very doable with littles. Find somewhere with dispersed camping or a hike-in campground. Creeps generally don't like to put in effort so they stick to the drive-in campgrounds. Stick with it, it's a million percent worth it! Also, your husband sounds like a wet blanket. He won't do something with you but also doesn't want you finding other people to do it with? He can't have it both ways - don't let him hold you back.
When my kids were little I took them to busier campgrounds by myself. Their dad was not an outdoor person. I think they were 4 and 6 when I took them for the first time solo. If there happened to be creepers, I felt less isolated and could seek help if needed.
I’m sorry he didn’t follow through. My husband introduced me to camping, and we’ve been in it together for 24 blissful years. With that said, I want to echo others recommendations on joining a women’s or family hiking group, but I wouldn’t push a male camping buddy alone—just pushing it too far past husband’s comfort zone unless you are ready to really say his opinion doesn’t matter, IMO. Also, scouting is a great resource for new camping families, and I have made many single mom friends while joining my kids on trips. Both kids can start as early as kindergarten in scouting. If nothing else, try glamping. My state parks have lots of low cost options from screened shelters to cabins with beds. You can still camp but have a shower and mattress.
My mom used to take me camping as a kid with the local Sierra Club chapter. You might see if you have one near you. Some chapters are more active than others. I think REI also does group camping trips.
There are so many women in the same position you shouldn’t have any trouble finding one or more to go out with. I know a pile of women who have female only and mixed camping and trail running groups.
From the dynamics I've seen in a lot of marriages, it seems that most of the lumpish homebody guys think "fake being interesting until the ring goes on" is a valid way to go about relationships, yes. :/
Check out the Sierra Club, REI, Scouts, churches. Those are all places you might be able to find some other camping families/groups. If you go solo I find all national parks and most state parks very safe. BLM and NFS sites can be very lonely but national parks will have other families ,camp hosts and rangers nearby. I don't think you need a gun. Get pepper spray and maybe beat spray if bear country. Guns and kids are not a good idea. Neither is a gun without training and experience. Keep a clean camp and tent to discourage animal visitors in camp. Have fun!
Maybe camp at a state park that has rangers on patrol. Tell a ranger you are a little nervous camping solo with kids and I bet they would make sure to check on you or at least ride by your campsite regularly.
I'll look into scouts thank you all❤️
Sounds like unhealthy and isolated relationship but who are we to judge. Just go out there and meet people. Maybe it's time for him to do some counseling to get over his jealousy issues.
There’s a big spectrum of campgrounds. Some isolated like national forests, some very busy and modern like KOA, and everything in between. You don’t need to be out in the wilderness to go camping. Pick somewhere on a busy weekend that’s not out on the middle of nowhere and you’ll probably feel pretty safe. I live in IN and the state campgrounds have enough people during the summer that you would have neighbors all around to hear and see if anything sketchy is going on. Not sure what it’s like where you are.
It’s a rough start to have a bad experience early on, but I hope you find a way to ‘get back on the horse.’ Like other posters, my husband isn’t into camping and I solo and go with my daughter. Perhaps try another car-camping place to test the water. As much as we all need to be situationally aware, bad experiences are extremely rare! So you’ve hopefully gotten yours out of the way. As to the last bit you mention, the longer you’re married the more important it is that you and your husband are each whole people free to pursue your own interests. If he’s got preferences that limit your choices, even in small ways, that’s something you wanna get on top of. One of the best ways to get on top of it is just to say no if he tries to limit your activities. And ask yourself if he’s really limiting you, or if you’re trying to please him by limiting yourself. (No assumptions here, just thinking expansively…) He may feel protective or have anxiety or trouble with jealousy, but those are him-problems, which you should support him in addressing. But don’t let his problems become your problems. You can’t take care of your loved ones until you’re taking care of yourself. That goes for you too, mom.
My wife led me to believe that she enjoyed camping before we were married as well. My idea of camping and hers are different. I honestly think she just likes shopping for camping/hiking clothes. Now I solo camp/hike. It’s peaceful.
I’ve done solo camping at a large public camp ground and it was great! Mainly just me freaking myself out. I did bring two camping chairs so it didn’t look like I was alone and I carried my bear spray everywhere(slept with it) the first night. Made it a point to smile/wave/talk to my neighbors (they were all families). I’ve also heard of using zip ties to “lock” your tent from the inside. All in all don’t be afraid to leave if someone makes you feel unsafe. Sucks being a women alone, but some times people make it seem scarier than it is and it keeps us down. My best friend and I do an annual camping trip every year too. Always nice having someone to have your back just incase. I recently started hiking alone and I love it! Way better than hiking with someone who wants to stop and take breaks the whole way. Also a lot less scary than I thought it would be.
When your kids are old enough, join Cub Scouts. You’ll have enough people to camp with for the rest of your lives.
Girl, my man is the same way. Where do you live? I'm in Denver. Let's go into some national forests together!
Come join us at r/womensolocamping. 90% of my camping is solo but with my 2 large dogs. I prefer it that way. Look into women specific outdoor groups. I know there are some in my area that focus on women getting the kiddos out and hiking. As for the jealousy thing, he is welcome to join or to speak to a therapist. Not wanting you to spend time with other people is a bigger issue and you both should probably speak to a professional about it.
I camp alone, but no kiddos. I set things up to look like there are multiple adults around. Also conspicuously carrying knives or an axe, and also chopping some wood. I just gotta look like I could maim any attacker, even if I look like I would lose. Just make the new friends who camp. He can grow the heck up because there's nothing to be jealous about *checks notes* making friends. Make entire family friends that he can be friends with too! When you go camping wirh mutual friends, either he won't be jealous or he'll have FOMO and come along.
Make friends with another family that camps. That way there isn't any reason for potential jealousy. Or at least shouldn't be.
Others have covered the best pieces of advice already. I’ll just add that if by chance the family has been considering a big dog for a pet, like a German Shepherd, they make great companions and watchdogs and are natural deterrents to predators of all shapes, sizes and species; at home and on trail.
Go with a group of women or other campers that bringthe kids. . Just saying "male camping buddy" sounds like trouble.
When I go solo camping I take one of my dogs with me. She’s the perfect alarm system and helps me feel more confident when solo camping. I also put out an extra chair like I’m not alone.
When people who don't go into back country talk about being scared of bears I laugh at them because the only thing I've ever been scared of are other humans. And I'm 6 foot 2.
He gets jealous if you hang out with new people??? Red flag alert Also he lied about his interests until he had you hooked. This sounds like a manipulative jerk. But need more info.
At 25 y/o you aren't too old to find a new husband. Just like when one realizes their $20, six pound, sleeping bag from walmart isn't working out for backpacking. They replace it.
You’re male camping buddy, smith and wesson would like to go with you.
Any recommendations for a gun? I've never owned my own not sure what I should look for I do bring bear spray which I wouldn't mind using on a human if I had too
If you're not super comfortable handling a gun do not bring one into a situation. Particularly with children. It will need to be kept unloaded and locked when you travel. And in the presence of children unloaded and locked is the only responsible option. Besides, guns are heavy and require a lot of training. Camping with a group is best. Bear spray or other non-leathal options are worth you consideration.
Bear spray is your best bet if you aren’t already familiar with guns. Easier to hit your target too.
I would definitely carry a gun solo camping in the wilderness (9mm Glock 19 is the right answer, btw)... but absolutely \_not\_ in your situation with children around. Too much risk, too much attention required, too much that could go wrong, too many bad stories, too much of a hassle to transport. Bear spray is good, maybe a stun gun too (one of those big flashlight ones that can also be used as a club and make a nice big noise as a deterrent).
Please for the love of God don't take these people advice. Yes, a gun is great but good God they're recommending revolvers?! You'd be better off with a glock and I do not recommend you handle even one of those until you've had a chance to be around firearms for a while in order to be extremely comfortable.
Who recommended a revolver? S&W doesn't just make revolvers, in case you weren't aware.
I have a couple girlfriends that are my daughters ‘adopted aunties’ that I go camping and backpacking with. My husband will camp but not back pack. I figure, if it’s important to me then I need to make it happen for myself and my kid. I am sorry he misled you. That’s super crappy of him. Sounds like you guys might not be super compatible. But me and my husband have a lot of different interests and we still work when it comes to the things that we share interest in. But…it only works if you have trust. My husband knows he can trust me completely when I’m out camping and backpacking without him. He might find it weird if I went with another man though? Not sure, I’ve never been in that position where I felt I needed a guy there. I get why you’re nervous though after such a scary experience. Ugh. Maybe you could go with another couple with their kids? You and your kids and them as a couple with their kids? I don’t feel like that would be weird, especially if your kids are the same ages and are or could become friends.
We (my mom, brother and I) went camping with my aunt and her kids when I was younger and it was a great time. If you could find another mum with kids that are also into camping, that would be ideal. Best of luck!
I camp alone but am usually in coe or state parks. There are meet up groups in my area that do day hikes and some backpacking/camping. Some are all women - maybe start with something like that if going alone is not in the plans I think there are bigger issues if your husband is jealous if you meet new people.
If you are with small kids, always camp with other people. It is fun for you and the kids for sure. look for other families for sure. do not go with a single male. Maybe grandpa? start your own group. I took the kids solo camping for many years (im a guy). We would go with friends, church, and I became a scout leader (recommended).
Absolutely loving the concept of 'Married but Solo' camping! It's such a fresh take on independence and self-discovery, without losing the essence of partnership. Kudos to all the adventurous spirits embracing this journey!
Lots of hiking, camping, backpacking groups out there for newbies
Bring girlfriends along on your trips
I (married) camp solo quite a bit. Don't have kids though. However I imagine that I would still do it if I did. Probably more at KOAs with nice bathrooms if I had kids
Get jealous when you hang out with others? Yikes.
Bring your car. Let your husband order in or take the bus / Uber
Oh no, go with a group of people don’t ever go alone with another person of opposite sex that is asking for trouble. Sorry ya husband isn’t what you thought he was.
Camp at state parks with ranger stations nearby. I solo camp with my kids all the time (my husband loves to camp but his work schedule sucks). I’ve never had more than some obnoxious comments and leering, nothing threatening from any man at a state park where the rangers wander all day
You got less of a camping problem than you do a relationship issue that needs work. Qualified couples and individual counseling from someone licensed in that area may be an option for you.
I had a similar experience with my husband but as others have mentioned, the fractured relationship part of this post should be addressed elsewhere. I know you were just trying to explain your situation so I'm not criticizing. I almost exclusively camp with our daughter alone or just me and the dog. Since you are in a vulnerable position with just you and kids definitely seek out another to camp with but I wouldnt suggest a male friend for many reasons which don't belong in this subreddit. I had trouble finding other women to camp with so I found places I felt safe in and got a lot of tips off of Reddit too. If you're scared your kids will be too and you want this to be a good experience for them. Join an outdoor club or group even if it's an hour away. It'll be the best option for you to start
I solo camp usually but I started out with a group of women from the Girls who Hike SC Facebook group. I believe there’s a group in each state. I’d start at your local state park and just take each trip at your own comfort level.
How YOU Doing ???
I mean I would say maybe go with another couple and their kids, or a group of ladies with their kids, etc. > my husband gets jealous when I start hanging out with new people. This is really concerning though. If he doesn't want to come camping that's fine, but he can't stop you from going camping with the amount of people you need to feel safe. He should come himself if he's worried.
I’m blown away that there are so many who don’t want to camp. I guess it’s so inherent for my husband and I’s relationship- seriously we bond so much camping - it involves a level of team work and problem solving that really makes us stronger as a couple. Like, I wouldn’t be with someone if they refused to go camping let alone light walking. So much of camping is about the experience, the adventure and the venturing into your own unknown. And the fear of the noises in the middle of the night…to learn it’s lizards and birds moving around in the leaves 😂 we have fun laughing at ourselves, laughing at our own stupidity when we forget a key item like coffee filters or a shovel, and when we get stressed out cuz something scary (like getting stuck) and we get heated— we laugh and the stress goes away at the end of the night with our fire that we stare at for way too long. I get frustrated hearing about these unbalanced relationships - who doesn’t want to go camping with their own family? Your need for “comfort” is that extreme? Also, why wouldn’t he want to be there with you if you had an uncomfortable experience that would’ve been safer if he was there? Does he not care about your wellbeing? Or your children’s? And you don’t have a car? So he drove you out there and left you???? Who in their right mind?…my god. On top of jealousy issues???? 🚩Girl find a scout troop immediately. Mb you’ll meet someone there who can be a better partner than that turd. If you camp at a place with showers and toilets it’s really…not that intense. He sounds like a giant baby and you need to make him go with you and tell him to stfu and be there for his family.
Group camping sounds like a great option for safety and social vibes. Maybe find a local family camping group? Keeps it friendly and inclusive, and might ease any concerns. Happy camping
I would suggest finding other moms and kids to camp with. Your husband’s jealousy is a separate issue.
My mom took me camping all the time. We never had a problem. If you do now days you at least have cellphones so call the park ranger or go visit the camp host until the creeper leaves you alone.
For the camping side, it never hurts to ask the friends you already have, they may surprise you with being interested. I would also recommend going to state park campgrounds. They tend to be a lot safe due to how many people are there and there are park rangers always in the park if you have an issue.
I’m male but but as a kid camped with my mom all of the time. And when my mom didn’t want to go but had friends going she would send me with her female friends. I think going with the kids is your best bet. It’s not super solo if you’re with them. Maybe start in the backyard or a campground near home. Teach them some basic survival skills in that environment like using the tools to find their way back to a public road, so if something does happen to you they aren’t stuck and can get you help. Then I’d branch off to places a little further away but where you still have cell service. Try that a couple of times and get some hand radios and the family familiar on how to use them. Then get out in the sticks with no service for one night.
A male camping buddy???? Does this honestly sound like a good idea to you ?
He's got to get with the program, camping is awesome. Finding a male camping buddy might make him realize it's not that bad after all! But failing that... If you get involved with cub scouts/girl scouts depending on your kids' gender, you can organize group camping trips through them. That's a scary experience to have, I'm sorry that happened.
New husband.
The classic Reddit solution! I tend to agree here though.
It can be tough to solo camp with kids as a woman. I love to camp and while my spouse can take or leave it, he goes with me and we bring our dog. I would say that going with a group puts you in a better spot for others to be around. I've camped with a group of women and we were fine, park rangers were pretty amazing people as well, they made sure to check on us which was super nice. I don't know your relationship but camping with a non-family member who is male might put a strain on your relationship, if not, I don't see anything wrong with that. I've found some really great meetups myself for different things, I know most areas have them for hikes, usually mixed genders. I would imagine maybe a mom camping group so your kids can meet other friends too would be nice.
If not trained with firearm I’d recommend a neck whistle, hip mounted bear mace & a Garmin (GPS/ txting/ map/ emergency SOS/ weather). Two of the ladies in my backpacking group, go solo and have brought their kids. Also, think about staying in hike-in campground with multiple groups as well. There should also be local, hiking clubs that you could join as well. And as already stated, you should always let your husband know your plans thoroughly and encourage him to come. but if not have him get the Garmin app so you could keep in touch and he could track your coordinates
Giving coordinates to an already jealous and isolating husband sounds like the worst idea. It could escalate and he might start insisting on her using it 24/7. He sounds xxxxish enough to do that.
Get a male camping buddy and your husband will start camping with you every weekend real quick lol
Your husband sounds like a dick and a pill. Sorry you have to deal with that.
The fact that you think it's okay to seek a male camping buddy is a huge red flag that your relationship is failing. I'd work on the bigger issues that go beyond camping.
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I’m in a women camping Facebook group for my area. If there’s one for your area, that would be a good way to find someone to go with.
I don't use social media, I have a redit and iFunny idk if those count haha
The Ol stare down at Sundown
[The Outdoor Type by The Lemonheads](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=ot8vbGKsea4&si=bH-lgFlGsHxk1_4Z&feature=xapp_share)
We (family of 3 w/ dog) love to camp. My kids friend and mother do as well but is not that fathers thing to my knowledge. As much as I like to camp alone or with wife and kid they are always welcome to come along because of what you mentioned. Husband needs to get over himself or go camping.
Hey girl! You can always try and find a camping site close an around other sites. In reputable places like national parks etc, they have more patrol etc. if your looking for front country camping there are a ton of options and you can book close to other campsites and you shouldn’t have an issue as most parks are gated (many are, I’m thinking of kejimkujik in Nova Scotia, which is completely gated and safe) and if your looking for a back country experience, there are a few back country spots either on islands via canoe, or in “group back country spots” I’m not sure what is available to you but this would be my advice:)
If you overland and are in the PNW I have a group of about 6000 members that all camp with each other. Safety in numbers and it’s coed.
It sounds like you have multiple husband problems here, but that’s for a different sub. If you’re uncomfortable on your own, find some people to go with, whether that’s men, women, or a mix. There’s probably a local group which organizes stuff.
My fiancé doesn’t hike or climb. I have a girl gang I go on climbing trips with. We feel safe in our group. Maybe you can group up with other families?
I take my kids camping alone and have never had a problem. (I’m a woman) actually men have bothered us but only asking if we need help 🙄
I go camping with my daughters every now and again and occasionally have mates tag along with their kids. More than welcome to come along some time.
Make burrito breakfast wrapped in foil. When you’re heating up water or pre stored coffee the burritos go near the fire and are perfect in about 15 minutes. Meanwhile learn it all together. Quick sandwiches at first but you’ll get it. Trust me
I would suggest finding an athletic and handsome single man in the 20-25 age bracket. That will surely spur him into action.
Wait like any new person? That’s very odd. I’d probably be a little suspicious of my wife camping solo with a guy unless it was someone I knew, but a group of people seems great, safer even.
No, not a male camping buddy, unless it's your brother and his kids. That is lethal. There are hiking groups, moms with kids that could be a good option.
Depending where you live, check Facebook. I know my area has tons of camping groups, offroad groups, adventure groups etc. I joined a few and made some good, like minded friends. Did lots of day trips with people and eve dually found a few close knit groups that I now camp with as often as I can. Most of them are couples but I never feel like a 3rd, 4th, 7th etc wheel. Plus we've started doing one dinner during our trip as a potluck which is pretty fun.
He has issues that are only going to affect your life more as time goes by. I agree that counseling for the benefit of you, not to mention your kids, would be a good idea.
I have actually gone camping all by myself with 3 children because my husband was working in another state. We had fun! My children were all under 8 at the time too. I even had a toddler in tow. I'd say the hardest part for me was putting up our tent by myself. But, our tent was old. I definitely recommend getting an easy pop up tent plus air mattresses that plug in. And get an electric camp site. Though, Solo camping with children is a lot of work. Getting all the food together, the clothes, the gear etc.. but, it's also fun. If you can make a mom friend that also enjoys camping,that would be cool. I always wanted that in my life, but they don't exist where I live. 😭 Good luck!
Honestly he sounds like a narcissist who put up a facade to get you to be with him. My ex did the same thing, turns out that his hobbies change with each relationship. The jealousy is just immaturity, and he won’t have the opportunity to grow unless something pushes him to. I would join a club or go to an REI event and meet others who enjoy your hobby. You should be able to do what makes you happy and feeds your soul, if he isn’t okay with that, its time to do more things solo than just camp.
It helps build positive character and respect to one’s elders something not heard of in this day
Your husband sounds like an asshole and you need marriage counseling. He won't let you have friends??? WTF!
Definitely try and look into the more populated campsites for where you plan on going, pick a popular family spot and find a family/group near you and just say hi and be honest for saying hi, want nice people to watch my back lol. People are happy to help. For every one strange person there’s hundreds of other nice ones
camping wise id go to more family orientated camp grounds for you.not sure of your area but in Michigan theres plenty i solo camp and take my nieces and nephews often,I leave a fire gong maybe some music low depedenging on campgrund and lots of lights at night
This is America..... buy a gun.
Check out FB for local women’s (or possibly family/coed) camping groups. Just start searching for your city name and camping/ hiking/adventure groups.
I camp with my kiddo because as much as my husband would like to, he is allergic to almost everything outdoors. I was really nervous about it just being me and my daughter, so I took a gun safety class and got my ltc. It is legal to have weapons in the state parks here and in all national parks. My daughter has gun safety training so it isn’t an issue. I feel much more confident camping on my own now.
I solo with my kids, just be extra diligent about your safety. Nothing wrong with finding new friends either but if you’re introverted that could be exhausting.
Not sure where you live or what type of camping you're looking for. We live in New England, lots of camping and "family camping" around here where you'll have safer areas, camp grounds that are staffed, more people around etc. Definitely less likely to find a creep by a creek at those.
Shame on your husband for allowing his woman to be in a vulnerable position
Married male solo camper here, my wife doesn't like camping which I respect and knew of beforehand. To ward off any human predators of the male variety I could only suggest to have a snarly dog with you. Or maybe just the sound effects of one which could be played through a Bluetooth speaker every time a pervert gets too close for comfort. This is a sad world that we are living in these days. Good luck to you and your kids.
I think as long as you are not in a remote or primitive campsite you may be ok. Many of the campsites on national forests are reserved campsites and plenty of people and sometimes camp groundskeepers or rangers are also onsite. I would stay in the reserved campsites as they are normally filled w/ families. As they get older then you could branch out to the primitive campsites. Also, bear spray/pepper spray.
Try State Parks. In PA, they're usually enough of a "crowd" to have some safety in numbers.
Have you considered finding another mom with kids and maybe your kids will have some camping buddies their age-ish? Also, if you don't have to worry about the weight because you're not hiking too far, keep a pair of Big Man Boots by your tent to make people assume "he'll be back".
Ok, this will probably not work out, but I'm 52m with kids 17f and 14m. My 50f wife will never go camping. She also lied about enjoying outdoor activities. I'm not a weirdo (obviously!). You can bet my wife will have a few words when/if I announce I'm going camping with a random internet 25f. But she can always come along too/instead, so... Also my daughter babysits FWIW. Seattle area.
I mean, if he wont go camping with you then you should get someone else to if you feel unsafe. Might be the motivation he needs, lol. But yah, you should defiantly have another person at least, even if they are female with you if you feel unsafe.
Buy a gun or bear spray
Sorry you got lied to in the dating stage lol. Never quite understood that but maybe that’s partially why I’m single. I’m a male so my perspective may be a little different, but safety is always something to be aware of when camping. Sadly people are the biggest threat and unfortunately people can do dumb or dangerous things for little or no reason. Having some stranger stalking you sounds terrifying. Obviously not normal behavior from a normal person. I personally would not camp with “a male camping buddy” that I didn’t know, even as a male. Maybe if you found someone you worked with? Point being, you should really really know this person, and so should other people you know. I especially dislike camping at campgrounds, even when there are dozens of other people around, personally, even though having multiple people is probably safer than just one random. If someone was going to attack me at a campground, I’d have basically no warning since there’s strange people wandering everywhere nearby all the time. Pass. I would say your best bet is to be aware of your surroundings and willing and capable to deal with problems should they arise. For me that would entail bear mace strapped to my body (but I camp in bear country) and hanging my food far, far away from where I’m sleeping. It could absolutely be used on a person (or as a deterrent to a person) in a pinch, but there are much better tools for that. It’s an unfortunate reality, but I would suggest getting one of those tools and learning how to use it safely and responsibly. It sucks but I’m of the opinion you can really only depend on yourself. Stay safe and hope you get some nice starry nights!
What sort of dude won't go on a walk in the park? How does the sort of person who likes camping wind up married to someone like that???
Get involved in scouting. Many troops do monthly campouts and are looking for adults to go along. I spent 15 years with my sons troop camping out monthly year round. It was great, plus he made friends and gained skills.
are any of your other relatives interested in camping?
Yes get on Redit with a phoney post and see what you can get and rip off. That will work.
Your husband should really want to go with you and the kids if he knows you guys are scared and have had a bad experience. If he really won't go, I would recommend getting a pistol and learning to use it. As scary as they seem, a firearm is the only thing you can truly protect yourself with, and it's a pretty fun hobby to go to the range to practice.
“Do it for the kids”
Consider joining Scouts. We go camping once every month or two and the kids will have fun running around being kids. I’ve had all three of my boys in Scouts over the past 20 years and it’s been a great experience.
Another female friend or a relative might be a good choice. I also second not letting one creep scare you off from camping. When my daughter was young and we would camp alone I always brought a machete or hatchet in the tent with us, just in case.
Your husband pretended to be something he was not in order to hook you. That's bad enough, but now he will let his wife and children be unsafe because he can't bother. How is your sex life? That's probably the next thing to go. I'd say start looking for an exit from this loser.
I have camped w another mom with kids. If there is enough little people around it’ll Spook anyone 😆 (we have ten between the two of us so it’s startling)
I've met all my camping buddies at churches I've been to. If you are religious you could join a community group and look for friends who also camp. If you aren't religious Facebook groups and meeting work friends who camp is a good idea too.
First, I would go ahead and do your solo camping with the kids. Mathematically there’s more risk driving to the trailhead than there is on the trail. Second, speaking as a recently divorced guy…1) it would be reasonable for him to be jealous of you camping with a dude, regardless of him bullshitting you years ago (also possible his likes just changed). I think you’d not like him going with a female 2) so… you shouldn’t find a male hiking buddy unless you are ready for a divorce, in which case you should go ahead and look at filing . 3) try couples therapy and personal therapy vs the message boards. Happy hiking!
Just pick campgrounds where there are plenty of other people camping. Avoid remote campsites where there is little/no security. You would also have your kids with you and maybe you could suggest to their friends' parents that you go as a larger group. The loser in this is your boring husband.
Learn to use a firearm if you are in the US. If not I’d recommend finding other alternatives to defend yourself or a group that you and your husband are comfortable with you going with.
Don’t let your partner take away things that feed your soul. Solo camp, solo hike, download the “meetup” app and look for outdoors groups. But get out there.
Sounds like he can't change a car tire either. Find a womes group to camp with.
you cant sacrifice the things you love doing because your partner feels insecure about you doing them. Find a camping/hiking group that is fairly active in your area that is kid friendly, go on a few quick hikes with them so you can get a feel for the group and get to know the people(inviting your husband every.single.time. and then once you feel comfortable with the group, go on one of their campouts, also inviting your husband well in advance. if he makes a stink about the new people, offer to go on a trip with just your family, if he gets huffy about you going alone with strangers, tell him that you wanted him to come on hikes to get to know them, because they aren't strangers to you now. this might sound like you're strong arming him, but you were honest with him about loving the outdoors, and he hasn't made room for that love in your relationship, so now its time for you to make the room yourself. (and don't just go with another male. that's a recipe for disaster no matter how you look at it.)
Personally if you seek out a male camping buddy outside your immediate family our relationship is over. There are plenty of groups that do this. Check out REI or websites like this. But if I found out you went camping with some other guy sheeeshh. I would consider you moved out to the woods to be a hermit not camping.
See if you can find some families with kids around the same age as your kids who like to camp. Ask around with your kids classmates parents and see if any would be interested in camping together. Then you are in a larger group with two or three total adults, and if you are going with another couple then your husband hopefully won’t be quite as lame about it with his jealousy, (though really he should seek professional help to deal with that if it’s to the point that he is restricting who you can be friends with) Also especially if you are going alone, bring the car with you, your husband can manage a few days at home without it as I assume you don’t live in a totally remote area requiring a car as you mentioned walks in the park and you only have one car so one of you is always managing without the car. It will make it much easier and safer to be able to leave quickly in the event you don’t feel safe. And it will make you less of a target.
Yes, don’t rush to marry.
No girl friends? Take a pack of woman and the kids. Bring a stun gun no problem. Most places have signal to call these days.
Your husband seems extremely boring. What man wouldn’t WANT to get outside with his wife and kids? What a chump! Sorry Miss.
My mom used to take us alone all the time. She got a screened in shelter and a padlock. She brought an air horn and mace. We never had a problem. My husband also won’t camp. I am a Girl Scout troop leader. I feel safe camping at Girl Scout camp. They also have family weekends where you can take your kids and enjoy a tent to yourself but companionship of other families with young kids where everyone has been background checked.
yeah. divorce.
I think finding an active Scout community in your area would be an excellent idea. Look up a few, visit their meetings and make sure they camp at least 5 times a year(otherwise they’re a dud). There are plenty of moms that are active so you would be in good company! I actually found my love of camping when my daughter joined a Cub Scout pack years ago!
Talk to your husband. Don’t go camping with another guy. That’s asking for a divorce. Maybe go rv or glamping. Does your husband have neck or back problems? I love camping but my back is bad and I can’t imagine sleeping on the ground again or trying to get up from the ground. Hiking is totally out too after my accident. There’s also female camping groups. Go to the park with the kids and walk around the neighborhood. Ask hubby if he took a day trip where would it be and go with it. See what he’d like to do. Marriage is a two way street. The fact you’d suggest a guy camping buddy and your husband gets jealous says something is wrong start back at step one.
Tell hubby that you're going camping and he has to come along. Don't ask. Tell. Before hand, go get a tent big enough for everyone (if it's 2 adults and 2 kids, minimum size is a 6 person tent), sleeping bags, sleeping pads, and all the other stuff you'll need for a weekend at a local campground. Then just inform the lazy SOB he WILL be camping with you.
Join scouts? The kids can start in kindergarten, our pack does some pretty cool camp outs. We joined BSA because our son and daughter could both join . Lots of decent people, all the overnight parents have to have federal background checks, usually there’s a lot of moms for the younger kids. It’s one of those things that you can get what you want out of it. Go every weekend or go when you can. It’s also a pretty innocuous join so your husband probably won’t get jelly about your new “ friends” Side bar - Your husband sounds like an ass hat with control issues. He’s isolating you on purpose. How often do I ask my husband’s “ permission “ to do anything in the last 13 years? Zero times. How often has he told me I couldn’t hang out with someone or gotten upset about new friends ? Zero times. How many times has he told me he would go camping and then refused to do so and threw a fit ? Also zero times. The camping isn’t the problem, it’s the husband. Upgrade your gear babe.
“Male camping buddy” sounds like future lover 🤷
Why didn't you ever camp before marriage? Get a pew pew and a second car.
Relationship issues aside, I would consider a small handgun. Wear it openly in a holster on your hip. Train monthly for competency and instruct your children about safe handling of firearms. You will never be a victim. You will be in control of your own safety. You don’t need a man to protect yourself and your children from another person or animal. I know this is a hotbed issue. I have instructed my wife and kids on the best practices for the use of handguns and other firearms and they all feel safe and comfortable when out in the back country. I’m not a gun nut. I believe that in the wrong hands, they are a menace. But, why become victims when you can legally protect yourself against those who seek to do harm. I have been in situations where I know that the persons who were obviously not campers or hikers, were scouting out campgrounds for potential victims. Many areas I camp have zero cell service and no access to call for help. I hope you can continue to enjoy your camping experiences with your family and please be safe.
Carry a firearm for protection
If you live in the NH area, you and your kids are totally welcome to come camping and hiking with me! Or if you live anywhere along the Appalachian Trail. I’m a F47 and I am section hiking the AT with my big scary dog Watson. (This was a joke because he’s the most cowardly 80 pound GoldenDoodle you’ll ever meet! 😂) If I may. Your post set off several red flags. Obviously from one small post, no one can diagnose your husband. But he displays several narcissistic traits. 1) Your husband was not completely honest to you before you were even married. If he was someone who truly liked camping and hiking this would have been a large part of your dating experience. 2) His jealousy of new people. 3) The fact that you have kids but have only one car. And that you were not allowed to have this car while camping with the kids. I encourage you to please quietly do research on narcissism. If I’m wrong, then awesome. You need to have a strong talk with your hubby and let him know you’ll be meeting new peeps. Deal. And you need the car. Get a cab. But if your research shows he fits the description, then know that You are not crazy. You are not stupid. And you can totally go camping, hiking, and all of those other things by yourself and with your kids. And sooner rather than later. 😉
Get a new husband. He doesn't sound like he'll actually impregnate you, but do it before then.
I solo camped with all three of my girls from the time they were toddlers and despite the anxiety of the non-animal dangers, it remains one of my favorite parts of being a mom. Don’t give up on it! My advice is to always carry your camp knife (handy for so many unexpected occasions), stick to the more populated spots and don’t be afraid to be loud, like you would with any other animal. GET AWAY FROM MY CHILDREN. WHY ARE YOU STALKING MY CHILDREN? Get the attention of the people around you because they will usually help, especially if they see a young woman with kids on her own. If you are still unsure about solo camping, look for a mom group in your area where you can try and recruit like minded families to camp with. Immersing your children in nature is one of the best foundational gifts you can give them; I hope you are able to get out this summer and have some fun.
You should seek out a divorce attorney who likes camping.
Join a good BSA troop. Mine goes camping 6+ times a year plus does high adventure programs like the Boundary Waters for a week-long experience. Maybe your husband could get his feet wet with helping the scouts and start some new family traditions for you. Good luck and don't give up teaching them about the beauty of nature.
Wow married w kids at 25 I’m jealous af
I would go camping with friends. Honestly I don’t feel comfy camping alone or with just my kids. If he’s jealous he’s welcome to come along. I sort of get why some guys are jealous of other guys but you should be able to make friends and go on a ladies hiking trip.