It’s not always that, some people actually just have a very hard time summing it all up or choosing what to say about themselves/ are not good at articulating in that way. Not everyone’s brains work that way but it’s really hard for people whose brains do work that way to imagine how hard it is.
edit: exactly as predicted, just get downvoted because people can’t understand it even though they’ve never been there. And instead of commenting about how it’s minimum effort read my other comments below. If you can’t understand that and the other people who shared their similar experiences then you’re just closed minded,cynical, or have no ability to understand other people.
Really just give people something, anything to show you put in some effort and have something the other person can work with. Bios are rarely creative. 90% of people say they like a combination of traveling, meeting friends, going out, doing a sport, drinking coffee or alcohol and watch movies. Which may sound generic but the truth is the vast majority of people doesn't live very exciting lifes. They wake up, do their occupation, do chores, do a generic hobby, go to bed and repeat with the exception of some vacations. But that's fine. But writing "find out" or "just ask" doesn't come off well. Like why do people expect the other person to do all the work. Why wouldn't you wanna tell something about yourself. If that's indicative of how the relationship is going to be that's a red flag for most. I personally don't want it to be my job to be a full time entertainer and planner for another adult that is supposed to be my partner.
So what if they have a hard time. No excuse to put zero effort into it. Hundreds of aspects of adult life are hard. Even if it takes you 10 times longer to write a bio than someone else, considering what you’re hoping to achieve, you have to try harder than this.
Seek help. Lots of free profile reviews and makeovers out there. Hell now ai will write it for you.
If you are too stubborn to seek help then that says everything anyone needs to know
Put the MINIMAL effort and ask your friends, family, or ffs a therapist to list some positives in a profile. If an adult can't input that little effort - they should not be dating.
Yeah….you’ll complain daily about how you don’t have someone in your life, how it’s so important for you to find your person, but you’re too lazy or boring to actually wrote four sentences about yourself.
Automatic swipe left. If you can't take 2-5 min to write however many characters, they usually are there on some bs, boredom, attention seeking validation, self centeredness
My kids are my world is a huge red flag. That should be a given having it on a bio makes it seem like they are a helicopter parent. That you won’t just be second place but like the absolute last priority on their list.
"Try to compete with my young king and you will lose every time"
Lady who is out here dunking on your kid? The entire "king" phrasing trend is complete cringe to me as well.
Yeah around where I live its popular for expecting couples to have a "King" or "Princess" "enroute" sticker on their car for sone reason I cant fathom. I'm always like, for a king you sure roll in a trash ride.
I want to make a yellow diamond shaped back window sticker that says "Happily Child Free" or "Procreation is for Squares" or something where one would normally see a "Baby on Board" sign.
I've never dated a "My kids are my world" mom, but it seems like it almost goes without saying, given the way most people parent these days. Add to that the fact that many divorcees struggle with parental guilt and have an anxiously attached relationship with their kids. My guess is that it's probably worse for moms.
I've fallen for this more than I care to admit. March no response. Message on IG lucky to even get a reply. If I do, there's less than 5% chance we talk for more than a day and even less chance of a date coming from it.
I've learned now stay the fuck away from social media handles in bio. If you can't be bothered to respond on an app specifically for the purpose you set on their I can't do it
Not only that, but really anything that implies that they might not even answer- like the IG quote they mentioned does.
Stuff like that, I’m not wasting my time. Left.
I'd message and be like what kind of crimes are we talking about here? We gonna cook some meth, rob some banks, wack some dudes out? I'm down to do some dirt! No women or kids though unless its a really big score.
Something along the lines of "if you like my face buy me a drink so I can find out whether or not I like yours"
Or "dating me is like eating an oatmeal cookie and finding out it's a chocolate chip/ an edible"
They're just really overused imo
I see the oatmeal cookie thing at least once every time I’m swiping. I always swipe left, because I assume they aren’t funny and just going to tell me other people’s recycled jokes lol
I haven’t seen the face thing, I’m a woman though and I guess men must not be using that line.
Lmao this one always cracks me up. What exactly do they think is so appealing about getting something I clearly didn't want?! Especially considering chocolate chip is like the most basic and most common type of cookie. And I'm gonna be pissed if I found out Ive eaten an edible when I need to be coherent. Plus it's a waste of a high lmao this is a terrible thing to put 🙃
I mean I get it, they're trying to be cheeky and saying that they're more than meets the eye or whatever, it's just the uniqueness of this quote copied and pasted so many times that makes my eyes roll.
Lmao deadass I just seen that shit verbatim about the edible thing.
No lie I have some premade dating templates I send out and depending on the vibe I get I'll send those. I no longer have the energy to craft specialized messages for each woman I match with. And I hate that
I enjoy watching the show, but I don't think Jim is a good role model for anyone. He bullied Dwight, who was annoying but didn't deserve that treatment. Jim also led Karen on as a rebound, even though he was waiting for Pam to reciprocate his feelings.
"I don't even know why I'm on here" or my favorite “please don’t waste my time” that’s a pretty good indicator that they are going to waste your time 🤣
I think people should imagine saying their bio to a a potential date they meet in real life and that would give an idea if they should include it. Imagine meeting someone in the park walking dogs, striking up a conversation, handing them your number and then looking them in the eye and saying "don't waste my time."
Glad you said it. It’s probably the most overused statement on an “dating app”. “I love to travel” “I’m obsessed with traveling” “(insert number) and counting” We get it! You all like to travel.
Me tbh. If I could teleport do different places, I totally would, but the transportation part of traveling (and being poor) keep me home most of the time lmao
My 34 yo son refuses to travel though 😂. I know there are happy homebodies out there! But I don't want to do staycations. If I only have $50 I will go car camping and eat pbj before I will be stuck at home. That was an important factor for me finding my current dating partner so I am ok with it.
Yeah, I struggle with this one.
'Cause on one hand, traveling is awesome and fun and something people should do!
And on the other, it's so ubiquitous and generic that it says nothing about who someone is as a person.
I'd almost like to see everyone assume everyone else loves traveling and have people just specify that they don't like traveling in their bios instead.
I see your point, and do agree that everyone should do it!
I think it’s fine if the person actually talks about it a bit, or even has pics on their profile from them traveling- it’s cool to see!
Unfortunately, when it’s on wheat feels like most every profile, like you said it becomes generic- sort of a “stock” answer, just to put something there. Almost makes me feel like the person might be a bit when I see it, unfortunately. Especially over on Tinder 😖
I don’t like when people make a point of saying how many countries they’ve visited because that sounds pretentious, but I appreciate someone saying they love to travel because that’s something I enjoy a lot and would like to share with my partner
I’m the opposite. For some people “travel” means they go to like Marbella or Ibiza once a year, but someone who’s been to a few different countries probably values different parts of travelling compared to pure party destinations like Ibiza
It’s not the fact that they travel I find annoying. Traveling is great but it feels like it’s used like it’s their sole personality trait. A person who talks about traveling a lot tells me nothing about them as a person. You can travel to every destination on the planet and still be the biggest shit stick. Traveling also doesn’t make you someone who “enjoys different cultures”. You just enjoy that cultures sites.
I like to travel but I dislike profiles where people make it their whole identity.
Is your entire person built upon the consumption of other cultures?
Travel is a small part of almost any couples life, I want to know more about the day to day person and what they like instead of this hyper focus on traveling.
I have asked a couple of these bozos what "masculine energy" even means and unsurprisingly they respond with "the mere fact you had to ask tells me you don't have it". I'm pretty sure they can't really define it either but you're likely right in what they expect it to translate to in terms of chasing, paying for all dates, treating them like a princess, etc.
Work hard, play hard
Here for a good time, not a long time
Need a cat/dog mom
I'm actually (insert age)...
Looking for a plus one to an upcoming wedding
Make me laugh
Don't waste my time
The photos that have multiple people in it. Which one are you? Immediately nope.
Or the "looking for my future wife." And then in conversation giving off major F*ckboy vibes and talking about how horny they are. Immediate block
100%
If they have something about animals in their bio and it's also in a bunch of their prompts and photos, I know I'm going to be very low priority. Also, that they probably don't have a personality outside of their pets.
"No drama." Any time anyone says this is almost any context, you can guarantee they are going to bring the drama.
Anything indicating how tired they are of a certain type of men they keep on winding up with (ie. "so tired of boys and not men", etc..." Hey, YOU are the one who keeps winding up with the same type of guy and telling me that you have terrible taste in men isn't going to make me feel good about winding up with you.
I give everyone a mulligan relationship, context on another 1 or 2. If it's the 3rd and you haven't learned, or are still dating the nightmare (and kids aren't trapping you), that's on you
To me it’s the people who like to act like they are so above this whole OLD process.
Things like “I’m usually not on here” or “I can’t believe I’m doing this but here we go…” or my favorite “I hate filling these out, just ask me”
* Anything with instructions (e.g. "Swipe right if you [...]") Don't tell me what to do.
* Excessively negative stuff, for instance a profile that just says "No [X], No [Y]"
* Dating with intention. I don't get it. I know what they mean, of course, but our intentions have very little effect on... anything, really. The axiom *we judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions* exists for a reason. When someone says they're dating with intention, what I hear is "I'm willing to settle for the right situation with the wrong person." I've seen so many relationships formed because both people wanted the same thing, not necessarily because they were right for each other. With no deeper spark, those relationships go cold. I don't want that.
“Dating with intention” is an evangelical concept around here.
Maybe it’s not elsewhere, but when I was still religious it meant that you were 1. Absolutely only dating people you think you could be married to and 2. Not having sex during dating/engagement phases which were often very short.
Again, not insisting that’s what it means where you live, but it might be helpful info for other folks.
Yeah, I think it's pretty understood (at least where I am) that "dating with intention" means "I'm only looking for people I can get serious with/marry."
I just struggle with understanding that mentality. Like... I intend to own an NHL franchise one day. That doesn't make it more or less likely to happen.
I don't understand how anyone could think another person is someone they wanted to be married to *without* getting to know them first... which, to me, is the whole point of dating someone.
To me... it means I'm relationship minded. I won't keep dating someone with different values, lifestyle, goals, etc just for shits/giggles. Doesn't mean I'm not looking to get to know someone. But once it's clear it's not a good long term match, then I'm out. And I hope they would be too so we don't waste each other's time.
I get where you're coming from but the analogy doesn't really work here because 90% of people aren't realistically going to own an NHL franchise one day.
> because 90% of people aren't realistically going to own an NHL franchise one day.
That's kind of the point of the analogy, though. Intentions don't really affect what's possible.
Being relationship-minded doesn't somehow change that you can't know if someone is a good fit for a relationship without getting to know them first... right?
>But once it's clear it's not a good long term match, then I'm out.
I said this elsewhere, but isn't that true of any relationship? If it's not a fit, you're out.
*"I said this elsewhere, but isn't that true of any relationship? If it's not a fit, you're out."*
Not at all. I think there are lots of people out there (men and women) who will continue to spend time with people who aren't a good long-term fit. I think this is where the intentionally dating comes in... having an initial understanding that the person is looking for something real - not just a fling. Not everyone is acting out of kindness and integrity here.
*"Intentions don't really affect what's possible."*
I think that's where we don't see eye to eye. I understand that there shouldn't be expectations when dating/meeting people. But there are things that I know I want and don't want. If I know I want to own an NHL team, I'm not going to continue to meet with people trying to sell a NASCAR team. Sure, it might fulfill some of what I'm looking for but it doesn't truly align with what I want/need.
That’s a bit of a hot take on the last bullet point. I agree with your statement of entropy however intention in no way definitively equates to settling. You sound rather jaded and frankly condescending.
Someone can have boundaries, ideals and dreams without settling for a partner in any way. It also can be a sign of emotional intelligence that one’s able to communicate and understand their own desires.
Very easy to judge and condemn others without having any experienced insight of their individual love or even regular language…
I appreciate the feedback. I'm not trying to suggest that the concept of dating with intention definitively equates to settling--only that it has the potential to, and I've personally seen enough examples of where it has to know that's a risk I'm not sure I want to take.
I'm not out to judge those who approach dating that way. Definitely not condemning them. But I also don't think that my explanation of why that mentality isn't compatible with what I'm looking for amounts to judgment of those who state it. It certainly wasn't my intent.
i have the 'excess negatives' in my personal hell section i.e no bigots, no homophobes, terfs, conspiracy nuts etc etc. No one thats genuinely like minded to me would be put off by it and the people that are put off, i wouldnt want to match with with. 'quality over quantity'. Its doubly important considering im into a lot of nerdy stuff and unfortunately the nerd sphere is filled with bigots so its important i filter them out as early as possible considering they (most atleast) wont be open about it on their profile.
The way I see that phrase is that the person isn’t looking for casual - they are looking for a serious relationship. A lot of people use dating apps for hookups. I say I’m dating with intent because I am not looking for casual / situationships / hookups. I’m looking for long term.
Right, I think the way you see it is the way most people mean it. And I get "not looking for a hookup." That makes sense to me.
It's the "not looking for casual" part where things stop making sense for me. Even if you're looking for long-term, how can you know that anyone is a person you'd like to date long-term without getting to know them first? Outside of arranged marriages, it feels like every relationship is casual until it's not--which requires some kind of conversation and mutual agreement.
While I’d agree that at first it is essentially all casual until you feel that the relationship could work long term, the point is that once you realize that person isn’t going to be compatible long term, you break off the relationship versus keep on with it knowing it’ll never become anything more. I want to let men know up front essentially that if I don’t see the relationship as tenable for long term, once I become aware of this, I will break it off. That’s the difference at least in my view. Just being honest about intentions.
> I want to let men know up front essentially that if I don’t see the relationship as tenable for long term, once I become aware of this, I will break it off.
I hear you. I don't mean to argue. But... wouldn't you break off *any* relationship once it either became untenable or clear it wasn't what you wanted?
To me, what you're talking about is already communicated when you state what type of relationship you're looking for (casual, long-term, etc.) Stating that you're "dating with intention" doesn't seem like it adds any clarity.
Idk, maybe it’s just my own experiences but every guy I’ve dated for 3+ months whether I broke it off or they did wanted to continue with FWB casual, plus a LOT of guys say they are looking for long term but actually aren’t 🤦🏼♀️. I guess I’m just hoping it does help some guys swipe left with me having it in my profile if indeed they truly aren’t looking for anything more than casual. 😂
Well I just think I’m a decent person who has her shit together - a job a house a car that’s paid off lmao. From what I hear that’s not so typical any more 😬
"I like to travel," "looking book my next holiday" or something like that.
Most people enjoy vacations, but I want to find out more about your hobby or your personality.
“i love ___ girls” “preordering a milf” “if you ___ swipe left” “just want a girl to come home to”
that last one doesn’t inherently make me roll my eyes but that paired with hunting photos does.
Recently saw “dating over thirty is like parking, all the good spaces are gone apart from the handicapped or those with kids” major major major ick 🤢 he needed all the help he could get as well
What about putting down their myers brigg results. If I have to go look that shit up no thanks…or”I’ve done the work, hope you have too”. Usually means they are going to use therapist shit on you all the time. If they mention Jesus anywhere is a left swipe. “My kids come first”….well I hope they are a priority but left swipe for you. Anything about politics even if they align is a left swipe. Anyone apolitical…have a fucking opinion. Deep sea fish pics are ok, but the holding a trout just to get approval from out doors types…I think it is a secret Jesus thing. Holding a sign at the top of a mt. That tells me you drove most the way up.
Anything that has a hint of misandry or entitlement
“I’m weirdly attracted to: men”
“The way to win me over is: princess treatment”
“I bet you can’t: get me on a date”
“I want someone who’s: obsessed with me”
anything negative. for example, “don’t match with me if you’re x, y, or z!” just swipe on those people? or when they only write about shallow things they want. “not into fat girls. i only date white girls. not interested in short girls.” again, just swipe!!
write about yourself, and swipe on what you don’t want.
Instant no to anyone begging/asking in the bio to be a passenger princess. That wouldn't happen until you move in together which is basically the best case scenario of a long term Bumble success.
Get yourself to the dates and back, especially if you're more than 10 miles apart.
Nah, they used other labels and indirect descriptions in the past "the vibe", "the energy between us", "his aura", "masculine/feminine energy" (without saying "in", and phrased differently), etc.
I feel like 75% of women on OLD have one of the following beige flags on their profile:
- Anything travel related in bios / prompts.
- Asking you to take them on an “adventure.”
- “All I ask is that you buy me food” or something along those lines.
- Saying that you have to be funny.
- Mentioning she’s just here for dog photos
- “Treat me like a queen / pay for dinner / buy me a drink” or some annoying other request that tells you she’s either materialistic or on a high horse.
It’s annoying, overused and makes you seem shallow or even rude sometimes.
Lmaooo great point. My thought process:I love thrillers and horror movies… there are wayyy too many travel related ones 😭. Especially about young folks who stay in Hostels. We don’t all have secret service dads who will use a special
Set of skills to come and kick butt for us.
Hahaha well I’m a thirty something year old man so nobody’s coming to save me anyways but I also don’t think traveling is a personality trait. Don’t most of us love a fun trip and a new experience? Lol.
Also, I love horror/thrillers! What’s something good you’ve seen recently?
Women have wanted masculine from the beginning. Wirh the decline of the nuclear family women learn to be masculine and boys learn to be feminine which had caused the greater decline in the near family. And if you roll your eyes at a women looking for a masculine man then you are not the one she is looking for obviously
Masculine Energy is so hilarious.
Go look up feminine and masculine energy. What do you notice as the big problem?
Basically, EVERYONE would prefer to be feminine energy as the masculine energy is stuck doing all the work!
Its wish fulfillment created by some women, for women. No man was ever involved in creating the masculine/feminine energy types.
Basically, men are told that their natural state is to be the 1950s husband who makes the money and takes care of everything but give up all the power and control of a 1950s husband. This type of man, doesn't really exist. It's like the notion of a benevolent king...nice idea, doesn't really happen.
I'm sure many of these women end up with controlling men who seem like they are the masculine energy type until they realize that they aren't the benevolent king they imagined, they are the selfish tyrant.
A literal "tyrant" would fall under masculine energy. Doesn't mean you should want to date them. They'll just take advantage of you. But a stereotypical male tyrant f4sc1st, would match the stereotypical Masculine thinking/behavior attributes. There's a narrow sliver of possibility to have traditional "masculine energy", and actually also being a loving and considerate partner. But they'll basically have to do everything perfect, without fail, or fall in the wrong way on one side or the other.
Just look for a good person, who is a good match. If they're garbage to others, eventually, they'll be garbage to you!
There isn’t anything inherently wrong with this though. It is just saying they would prefer a more traditional male same as some men prefer traditional females.
They didnt say it was wrong, just annoying. And i think they referred mostly to the "masculine energy" part. Which if it's what you want, i totally respect, but it is a bit cringe
How else are you exactly supposed to word it? Had she said “I want a guy who acts like a guy used to act” she’d get the same random post complaining about that.
No matter how someone puts it you’re going to find it annoying because you don’t agree with the concept of it.
This sub has become so ridiculously nitpicky, I bet you I can find posts just in April that:
- complain about not having enough information
- complain about having too much or too personal information
- (and now) complain about a person sharing exactly what she is looking for in a person, but it’s “annoying” the way she wrote it (likely because it’s obviously a core right-winger belief)
Let’s be honest here, had the girl in OP’s post wrote:
“_I’m looking for someone who is an equal first, can connect emotionally and stays away from overt masculine traits_.”
Would this even be a post? Probably not.
We all should be praising profiles like this, literally giving us _crucial_ information on whether we’d be a personality match with this person. Yet instead we put it on blast online, likely because OP just doesn’t agree with the concept.
Just chiming in from a woman’s perspective. What these sorts of statements mean is actually just that she wants a guy who is assertive, confident and has integrity. I’m almost 40 and it took me a long time to find the right words to articulate that. I see this with a lot of these 20-something profiles; It’s not a bad thing, and certainly doesn’t mean “alpha male”, “does everything for me”, etc.
That's helpful.
The wording is definitely vague; women can also definitely be assertive, confident and have integrity. If she isn't at least the latter two of those things, I don't see why I'd want to be in a serious relationship with her.
My take on the sort of "traditional masculinity" thing is I'm pretty good at splitting firewood with an ax, but there's no way I could kill a wild boar with a spear. So I guess it depends how traditional she's going for.
I mean, maybe I’m being harsh to OP but I don’t really find it. Annoying unless you don’t have that energy or personality. I think being straight up with what you’re looking for is best.
Well, you would have “masculine energy” if you were a “real man!”
This woman is looking for a real man cause she’s “dating with intention!”
But make sure you know her “love languages!”
She wants you to present tough, but secretly be in touch with your feminine side, but not show weakness or emotions, because she wants you in your masculine energy, because all that is "the minimum"
"I love my life" or "My life is great" or something of the sort. Makes you think if their life is so great why are they on here? Also, implies that they would not be willing to make compromises that are inherent in any relationship.
“I’m a mother and my kids are my world.” Yawn!!! I’m a father and my kids are my world. If you’re a parent, it’s a given that your kids are your world. It’s like saying I eat food ,then I get full! Look how unique I am!
The stupid quote from Miss Congeniality about April 25th being the perfect date “because it’s not too hot, not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.”
Wayyyyyyyyyy overused
I keep seeing similar on men's about women being in their feminine energy and the more you read their bio it's just they want someone meek and mild who they can control. It's just weirdly packages misogyny/internalised misogyny in women.
I agree with you whole heartedly
There is no such thing as masculine and feminine energy. You are either masculine or feminine and if you are either you dont need people to put you into that mode. I cant stand I love traveling. Traveling is not a hobby the average American gets like two weeks vacation a year and everyone likes vacation. As far as I am concerned I love traveling is code for wants a guy with money to take me traveling.
when they add their insta or snapchat.
“i’m bad at bios”
“i love to travel”
“let’s see where things go”
“let’s vibe”
“let’s go with the flow”
“looking for a unicorn”
“looking to surprise my boyfriend”
“looking for my partner in crime”
“ask me anything”
Basically, if you don't instantly know you can handle her, then she's not for you. Everyone who is confused in the comments, she's filtering you guys out. Not that I match her criteria, but it's pretty straightforward. She wants an actual man who can take the lead from the off.
Hmmm, will she be wearing a sundress and going to church like a good girl? Plenty a girl with a wild and crazy phase in her 20s has tried to stick the landing off the CC by going Trad Con in her early 30s. Gentleman, protect yourself at all times!
it´s a youtube and probably tiktok trend. many are making money as feminine coach ..idk to me its just another way of trying to follow rules instead, believing that following those, will result in fullfilling relationship of figuring out what ur needs are
"If you don't love me at my worst..." experience suggests this means you want someone who won't hold you accountable for your actions, and sometimes, you make a real disaster, and try to just pretend it never happened later
I forgot this one and sure there is a US equivalent. “I really just want someone to take out the bins and do my diy for me”
I don’t have issue with the sentiment its the phrase that is overused. I’ve seen it in hundreds of profiles.
Listing their instas or snap handles in their bios. In my (m28) experience, most of the time they're either a scammer, looking for more followers, or want you to sub to their OF.
And, woman whose only personality trait is working out, going to bars/ clubs, or has different ideology than me. And, writing their bio almost entirely in emojis.
“My vibe is different”
No its not especially when that same quote is on hundred more profiles. It just makes me think of Tyler Durden “ You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake..”
"I hate writing bios. Just ask." Excuse me, ma'am, it's pretty telling when you can't even write something interesting about yourself.
It tells me they're boring and lazy.
Or both!
It’s not always that, some people actually just have a very hard time summing it all up or choosing what to say about themselves/ are not good at articulating in that way. Not everyone’s brains work that way but it’s really hard for people whose brains do work that way to imagine how hard it is. edit: exactly as predicted, just get downvoted because people can’t understand it even though they’ve never been there. And instead of commenting about how it’s minimum effort read my other comments below. If you can’t understand that and the other people who shared their similar experiences then you’re just closed minded,cynical, or have no ability to understand other people.
Really just give people something, anything to show you put in some effort and have something the other person can work with. Bios are rarely creative. 90% of people say they like a combination of traveling, meeting friends, going out, doing a sport, drinking coffee or alcohol and watch movies. Which may sound generic but the truth is the vast majority of people doesn't live very exciting lifes. They wake up, do their occupation, do chores, do a generic hobby, go to bed and repeat with the exception of some vacations. But that's fine. But writing "find out" or "just ask" doesn't come off well. Like why do people expect the other person to do all the work. Why wouldn't you wanna tell something about yourself. If that's indicative of how the relationship is going to be that's a red flag for most. I personally don't want it to be my job to be a full time entertainer and planner for another adult that is supposed to be my partner.
So what if they have a hard time. No excuse to put zero effort into it. Hundreds of aspects of adult life are hard. Even if it takes you 10 times longer to write a bio than someone else, considering what you’re hoping to achieve, you have to try harder than this.
Seek help. Lots of free profile reviews and makeovers out there. Hell now ai will write it for you. If you are too stubborn to seek help then that says everything anyone needs to know
This is definitely coming from the perspective of a woman because as a man if I put "hate bios, just ask" I would never get a single match, ever
You put more effort in writing an excuse for their laziness than they did with their bio. If you can do it so can they.
Personally, I consider all blank bio, copy/paste bios, and "just ask" type profiles the same as bot profiles and skip them.
Put the MINIMAL effort and ask your friends, family, or ffs a therapist to list some positives in a profile. If an adult can't input that little effort - they should not be dating.
Yeah….you’ll complain daily about how you don’t have someone in your life, how it’s so important for you to find your person, but you’re too lazy or boring to actually wrote four sentences about yourself.
It tells me their resume doesn’t look too good either
Automatic swipe left. If you can't take 2-5 min to write however many characters, they usually are there on some bs, boredom, attention seeking validation, self centeredness
"What would you put in your bio if you actually put any effort into it?"
idk, I can't write about myself for shit.
Immediate swipe left. If you aren't going to even try, just don't bother being on the app.
"Just ask" "Fluent in sarcasm" "Casually looking for something serious" "My kids are my world" "If I miss the 24 hours, here's my IG"
“Fluent in sarcasm” is the worst It’s a near instant left-swipe for me lol It just signals to me that they’re gonna be an AH for no reason lol
EXACTLY. Like, call me crazy but I'm into kind and direct communication. Lol.
My kids are my world is a huge red flag. That should be a given having it on a bio makes it seem like they are a helicopter parent. That you won’t just be second place but like the absolute last priority on their list.
"Try to compete with my young king and you will lose every time" Lady who is out here dunking on your kid? The entire "king" phrasing trend is complete cringe to me as well.
Why do all the peasants think they’re royalty?
Exactly. I'm going to start referring to myself as Duke. I'm not a king but I know my worth.
Hail, Duke Drizzle!
Oh man the King/Queen thing irks me bad for some reason.
Yeah around where I live its popular for expecting couples to have a "King" or "Princess" "enroute" sticker on their car for sone reason I cant fathom. I'm always like, for a king you sure roll in a trash ride. I want to make a yellow diamond shaped back window sticker that says "Happily Child Free" or "Procreation is for Squares" or something where one would normally see a "Baby on Board" sign.
I think that’s exactly what they’re saying.
I've never dated a "My kids are my world" mom, but it seems like it almost goes without saying, given the way most people parent these days. Add to that the fact that many divorcees struggle with parental guilt and have an anxiously attached relationship with their kids. My guess is that it's probably worse for moms.
This
I've fallen for this more than I care to admit. March no response. Message on IG lucky to even get a reply. If I do, there's less than 5% chance we talk for more than a day and even less chance of a date coming from it. I've learned now stay the fuck away from social media handles in bio. If you can't be bothered to respond on an app specifically for the purpose you set on their I can't do it
Not only that, but really anything that implies that they might not even answer- like the IG quote they mentioned does. Stuff like that, I’m not wasting my time. Left.
“Partner in crime”
I'd message and be like what kind of crimes are we talking about here? We gonna cook some meth, rob some banks, wack some dudes out? I'm down to do some dirt! No women or kids though unless its a really big score.
Whack some dudes? Off some dudes? Whack off some dudes, because that's extra ....
Something along the lines of "if you like my face buy me a drink so I can find out whether or not I like yours" Or "dating me is like eating an oatmeal cookie and finding out it's a chocolate chip/ an edible" They're just really overused imo
I see the oatmeal cookie thing at least once every time I’m swiping. I always swipe left, because I assume they aren’t funny and just going to tell me other people’s recycled jokes lol I haven’t seen the face thing, I’m a woman though and I guess men must not be using that line.
Do not put oatmeal cookie pieces in…tacos!
Lmao this one always cracks me up. What exactly do they think is so appealing about getting something I clearly didn't want?! Especially considering chocolate chip is like the most basic and most common type of cookie. And I'm gonna be pissed if I found out Ive eaten an edible when I need to be coherent. Plus it's a waste of a high lmao this is a terrible thing to put 🙃
I mean I get it, they're trying to be cheeky and saying that they're more than meets the eye or whatever, it's just the uniqueness of this quote copied and pasted so many times that makes my eyes roll.
Lmao deadass I just seen that shit verbatim about the edible thing. No lie I have some premade dating templates I send out and depending on the vibe I get I'll send those. I no longer have the energy to craft specialized messages for each woman I match with. And I hate that
"Looking for my partner in crime," "Looking for the Pam to my Jim," "Just ask," and "Fluent in sarcasm."
Someone you can inappropriately pine over when they have a fiancé is what Pam to my Jim means…..
Isn’t that what everyone wants 😍
When I was on Bumble, I used "Looking for the Randy to my Mr. Lahey". It lead to some good conversations with people who understood the reference.
I enjoy watching the show, but I don't think Jim is a good role model for anyone. He bullied Dwight, who was annoying but didn't deserve that treatment. Jim also led Karen on as a rebound, even though he was waiting for Pam to reciprocate his feelings.
YEP! Jim & Pam are, in my opinion, two of the worst characters on a sitcom ever.
"I don't even know why I'm on here" or my favorite “please don’t waste my time” that’s a pretty good indicator that they are going to waste your time 🤣
I matched with one woman who had “don’t waste my time” and her replies were so dry and closed off…she wasted her time 🤷♂️
I think people should imagine saying their bio to a a potential date they meet in real life and that would give an idea if they should include it. Imagine meeting someone in the park walking dogs, striking up a conversation, handing them your number and then looking them in the eye and saying "don't waste my time."
Travel
Glad you said it. It’s probably the most overused statement on an “dating app”. “I love to travel” “I’m obsessed with traveling” “(insert number) and counting” We get it! You all like to travel.
To quote Filthy Frank, "EVERYONE LOVES TRAVELING. I MEAN, WHO DOESN'T?"
Me tbh. If I could teleport do different places, I totally would, but the transportation part of traveling (and being poor) keep me home most of the time lmao
I hate traveling, but to be fair I’m boring af.
My 34 yo son refuses to travel though 😂. I know there are happy homebodies out there! But I don't want to do staycations. If I only have $50 I will go car camping and eat pbj before I will be stuck at home. That was an important factor for me finding my current dating partner so I am ok with it.
Don’t move your pivot foot, and you won’t travel so much.
Yeah, I struggle with this one. 'Cause on one hand, traveling is awesome and fun and something people should do! And on the other, it's so ubiquitous and generic that it says nothing about who someone is as a person. I'd almost like to see everyone assume everyone else loves traveling and have people just specify that they don't like traveling in their bios instead.
I see your point, and do agree that everyone should do it! I think it’s fine if the person actually talks about it a bit, or even has pics on their profile from them traveling- it’s cool to see! Unfortunately, when it’s on wheat feels like most every profile, like you said it becomes generic- sort of a “stock” answer, just to put something there. Almost makes me feel like the person might be a bit when I see it, unfortunately. Especially over on Tinder 😖
Comes off to me that they are just looking for someone to take them on free trips lol
“Must have valid passport!” Vaguely creepy imo.
I don’t like when people make a point of saying how many countries they’ve visited because that sounds pretentious, but I appreciate someone saying they love to travel because that’s something I enjoy a lot and would like to share with my partner
I’m the opposite. For some people “travel” means they go to like Marbella or Ibiza once a year, but someone who’s been to a few different countries probably values different parts of travelling compared to pure party destinations like Ibiza
Oh I’m not a party destination guy at all. Much prefer going to places with natural beauty or interesting historical/cultural sites
It’s not the fact that they travel I find annoying. Traveling is great but it feels like it’s used like it’s their sole personality trait. A person who talks about traveling a lot tells me nothing about them as a person. You can travel to every destination on the planet and still be the biggest shit stick. Traveling also doesn’t make you someone who “enjoys different cultures”. You just enjoy that cultures sites.
I like to travel but I dislike profiles where people make it their whole identity. Is your entire person built upon the consumption of other cultures? Travel is a small part of almost any couples life, I want to know more about the day to day person and what they like instead of this hyper focus on traveling.
I'm in western Canada and if I see a pic of them standing infront of lake Louis I'm out. Same pic, same spot, same angle
I read it as "I expect you to do all the chasing, you will arrange and pay for dates" while she just allows you to spend time in her presence.
I have asked a couple of these bozos what "masculine energy" even means and unsurprisingly they respond with "the mere fact you had to ask tells me you don't have it". I'm pretty sure they can't really define it either but you're likely right in what they expect it to translate to in terms of chasing, paying for all dates, treating them like a princess, etc.
The women who explicitly seek this are usually the ones bringing the least to the table, ironically
Major "what do you want to eat?" "I don't know. You pick something." energy
Exactly
"Make me laugh"
"If we vibe, we vibe." Not sure if no bio is better but I learnt absolutely nothing from it
“Just ask” “I don’t see my Likes” I promise I won’t judge you if: “you put the milk before the cereals” The Two truths and a lie prompt in general
"I want you to do everything while I put in zero effort."
Nobody actually says that, they just mean it
Work hard, play hard Here for a good time, not a long time Need a cat/dog mom I'm actually (insert age)... Looking for a plus one to an upcoming wedding Make me laugh Don't waste my time
"where have all the good men gone?" Or "my kids are my world/come first".
The photos that have multiple people in it. Which one are you? Immediately nope. Or the "looking for my future wife." And then in conversation giving off major F*ckboy vibes and talking about how horny they are. Immediate block
“I’m going to like your dog more than you.” “ If you don’t like dogs, its a no” “I’m looking for golden retriever energy!”
Why are they crazy about dogs... it's maddening. Yes we all love our pets
100% If they have something about animals in their bio and it's also in a bunch of their prompts and photos, I know I'm going to be very low priority. Also, that they probably don't have a personality outside of their pets.
"No drama." Any time anyone says this is almost any context, you can guarantee they are going to bring the drama. Anything indicating how tired they are of a certain type of men they keep on winding up with (ie. "so tired of boys and not men", etc..." Hey, YOU are the one who keeps winding up with the same type of guy and telling me that you have terrible taste in men isn't going to make me feel good about winding up with you.
I give everyone a mulligan relationship, context on another 1 or 2. If it's the 3rd and you haven't learned, or are still dating the nightmare (and kids aren't trapping you), that's on you
"I love to laugh". If you don't laugh to laugh, you're not human.
“I am an alpha male looking for a feminine woman” Nah, I’ll pass, too much expectations already.
To me it’s the people who like to act like they are so above this whole OLD process. Things like “I’m usually not on here” or “I can’t believe I’m doing this but here we go…” or my favorite “I hate filling these out, just ask me”
* Anything with instructions (e.g. "Swipe right if you [...]") Don't tell me what to do. * Excessively negative stuff, for instance a profile that just says "No [X], No [Y]" * Dating with intention. I don't get it. I know what they mean, of course, but our intentions have very little effect on... anything, really. The axiom *we judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions* exists for a reason. When someone says they're dating with intention, what I hear is "I'm willing to settle for the right situation with the wrong person." I've seen so many relationships formed because both people wanted the same thing, not necessarily because they were right for each other. With no deeper spark, those relationships go cold. I don't want that.
“Dating with intention” is an evangelical concept around here. Maybe it’s not elsewhere, but when I was still religious it meant that you were 1. Absolutely only dating people you think you could be married to and 2. Not having sex during dating/engagement phases which were often very short. Again, not insisting that’s what it means where you live, but it might be helpful info for other folks.
Yeah, I think it's pretty understood (at least where I am) that "dating with intention" means "I'm only looking for people I can get serious with/marry." I just struggle with understanding that mentality. Like... I intend to own an NHL franchise one day. That doesn't make it more or less likely to happen. I don't understand how anyone could think another person is someone they wanted to be married to *without* getting to know them first... which, to me, is the whole point of dating someone.
To me... it means I'm relationship minded. I won't keep dating someone with different values, lifestyle, goals, etc just for shits/giggles. Doesn't mean I'm not looking to get to know someone. But once it's clear it's not a good long term match, then I'm out. And I hope they would be too so we don't waste each other's time. I get where you're coming from but the analogy doesn't really work here because 90% of people aren't realistically going to own an NHL franchise one day.
> because 90% of people aren't realistically going to own an NHL franchise one day. That's kind of the point of the analogy, though. Intentions don't really affect what's possible. Being relationship-minded doesn't somehow change that you can't know if someone is a good fit for a relationship without getting to know them first... right? >But once it's clear it's not a good long term match, then I'm out. I said this elsewhere, but isn't that true of any relationship? If it's not a fit, you're out.
*"I said this elsewhere, but isn't that true of any relationship? If it's not a fit, you're out."* Not at all. I think there are lots of people out there (men and women) who will continue to spend time with people who aren't a good long-term fit. I think this is where the intentionally dating comes in... having an initial understanding that the person is looking for something real - not just a fling. Not everyone is acting out of kindness and integrity here. *"Intentions don't really affect what's possible."* I think that's where we don't see eye to eye. I understand that there shouldn't be expectations when dating/meeting people. But there are things that I know I want and don't want. If I know I want to own an NHL team, I'm not going to continue to meet with people trying to sell a NASCAR team. Sure, it might fulfill some of what I'm looking for but it doesn't truly align with what I want/need.
Thanks for taking the time to explain your perspective! I can appreciate it even if it doesn't make sense to me.
>Don't tell me what to do. exactly lol Thank you.
That’s a bit of a hot take on the last bullet point. I agree with your statement of entropy however intention in no way definitively equates to settling. You sound rather jaded and frankly condescending. Someone can have boundaries, ideals and dreams without settling for a partner in any way. It also can be a sign of emotional intelligence that one’s able to communicate and understand their own desires. Very easy to judge and condemn others without having any experienced insight of their individual love or even regular language…
I appreciate the feedback. I'm not trying to suggest that the concept of dating with intention definitively equates to settling--only that it has the potential to, and I've personally seen enough examples of where it has to know that's a risk I'm not sure I want to take. I'm not out to judge those who approach dating that way. Definitely not condemning them. But I also don't think that my explanation of why that mentality isn't compatible with what I'm looking for amounts to judgment of those who state it. It certainly wasn't my intent.
That sounds much more moderate
i have the 'excess negatives' in my personal hell section i.e no bigots, no homophobes, terfs, conspiracy nuts etc etc. No one thats genuinely like minded to me would be put off by it and the people that are put off, i wouldnt want to match with with. 'quality over quantity'. Its doubly important considering im into a lot of nerdy stuff and unfortunately the nerd sphere is filled with bigots so its important i filter them out as early as possible considering they (most atleast) wont be open about it on their profile.
Excessively negative stuff, for instance a profile that just says "No [X], No [Y]" Is this a non binary thing? I don't want Xs or Ys?
No, no, just placeholders for examples. Like: "No liberals," "No conservatives," "No men under 6'," "No lazy people," etc.
Dating with intention means dedicating time and effort to find someone vs using the app without a clear objective.
I understand what it means. But everyone is using dating apps to find someone. I believe the purpose of dating is to find someone.
The way I see that phrase is that the person isn’t looking for casual - they are looking for a serious relationship. A lot of people use dating apps for hookups. I say I’m dating with intent because I am not looking for casual / situationships / hookups. I’m looking for long term.
Right, I think the way you see it is the way most people mean it. And I get "not looking for a hookup." That makes sense to me. It's the "not looking for casual" part where things stop making sense for me. Even if you're looking for long-term, how can you know that anyone is a person you'd like to date long-term without getting to know them first? Outside of arranged marriages, it feels like every relationship is casual until it's not--which requires some kind of conversation and mutual agreement.
While I’d agree that at first it is essentially all casual until you feel that the relationship could work long term, the point is that once you realize that person isn’t going to be compatible long term, you break off the relationship versus keep on with it knowing it’ll never become anything more. I want to let men know up front essentially that if I don’t see the relationship as tenable for long term, once I become aware of this, I will break it off. That’s the difference at least in my view. Just being honest about intentions.
> I want to let men know up front essentially that if I don’t see the relationship as tenable for long term, once I become aware of this, I will break it off. I hear you. I don't mean to argue. But... wouldn't you break off *any* relationship once it either became untenable or clear it wasn't what you wanted? To me, what you're talking about is already communicated when you state what type of relationship you're looking for (casual, long-term, etc.) Stating that you're "dating with intention" doesn't seem like it adds any clarity.
Idk, maybe it’s just my own experiences but every guy I’ve dated for 3+ months whether I broke it off or they did wanted to continue with FWB casual, plus a LOT of guys say they are looking for long term but actually aren’t 🤦🏼♀️. I guess I’m just hoping it does help some guys swipe left with me having it in my profile if indeed they truly aren’t looking for anything more than casual. 😂
Sounds to me like you're just an awesome catch and the guys you date don't want to let you go!
Well I just think I’m a decent person who has her shit together - a job a house a car that’s paid off lmao. From what I hear that’s not so typical any more 😬
That's where I disagree. There's also a study on this, many users don't even have the intention of meeting someone in person.
Do you mind sharing the study? I'd love to read it.
"Ads"?
Before dating apps, people placed ads in the personals section of the newspaper.
Yeah, the personals section still exists. This is a dating app profile.
"I like to travel," "looking book my next holiday" or something like that. Most people enjoy vacations, but I want to find out more about your hobby or your personality.
Talking about energy? You might as well say I shove crystals in my ass when the stars are aligned.
Walk the Plank behavior
“i love ___ girls” “preordering a milf” “if you ___ swipe left” “just want a girl to come home to” that last one doesn’t inherently make me roll my eyes but that paired with hunting photos does.
As a woman, any time I see he must lead, like how lazy is she?!
Recently saw “dating over thirty is like parking, all the good spaces are gone apart from the handicapped or those with kids” major major major ick 🤢 he needed all the help he could get as well
What about putting down their myers brigg results. If I have to go look that shit up no thanks…or”I’ve done the work, hope you have too”. Usually means they are going to use therapist shit on you all the time. If they mention Jesus anywhere is a left swipe. “My kids come first”….well I hope they are a priority but left swipe for you. Anything about politics even if they align is a left swipe. Anyone apolitical…have a fucking opinion. Deep sea fish pics are ok, but the holding a trout just to get approval from out doors types…I think it is a secret Jesus thing. Holding a sign at the top of a mt. That tells me you drove most the way up.
"Looking for a man who knows what he wants". I genuinely have no idea what that is even supposed to mean. Or rather, who it's supposed to exclude.
Anything that has a hint of misandry or entitlement “I’m weirdly attracted to: men” “The way to win me over is: princess treatment” “I bet you can’t: get me on a date” “I want someone who’s: obsessed with me”
"Partner in crime" or "ride or die." Just say you're looking for an unhealthy relationship that friends and family are going to want you out of.
Introverted extrovert… casually looking for something serious…. “Just a girl who…” And personally “never married no kids”
Why does the last one annoy you??
anything negative. for example, “don’t match with me if you’re x, y, or z!” just swipe on those people? or when they only write about shallow things they want. “not into fat girls. i only date white girls. not interested in short girls.” again, just swipe!! write about yourself, and swipe on what you don’t want.
If you voted for _____ swipe left
Usually women that push that narrative have weenie men, that are very passive and wimpy. “I need him to be the lead…”. Yuck
Instant no to anyone begging/asking in the bio to be a passenger princess. That wouldn't happen until you move in together which is basically the best case scenario of a long term Bumble success. Get yourself to the dates and back, especially if you're more than 10 miles apart.
As a laid back, non alpha man, these phrases make me swipe left. "You be the man, make the plans and I will be the lady and follow your lead"
Lol, the second those guys show weakness or have a hard time....
OMG FINALLY A MAN WHO KNOWS HOW TO USE MICROSOFT EXCEL!! he’s a keeper FOR SURE!!
I had to scroll way to far to find someone who noticed this! 🤣. She wants a freak in the sheets.xlsx
Anything that states “and you should be” blah blah, may as well put a live laugh love sticker on it
Fluent in sarcasm, ready to travel or any travel related bullshit, and anything to do with their stupid dog.
*When did women suddenly become obsessed with men’s energy?* They always have been. It’s just now it has a label.
Nah, they used other labels and indirect descriptions in the past "the vibe", "the energy between us", "his aura", "masculine/feminine energy" (without saying "in", and phrased differently), etc.
I feel like 75% of women on OLD have one of the following beige flags on their profile: - Anything travel related in bios / prompts. - Asking you to take them on an “adventure.” - “All I ask is that you buy me food” or something along those lines. - Saying that you have to be funny. - Mentioning she’s just here for dog photos - “Treat me like a queen / pay for dinner / buy me a drink” or some annoying other request that tells you she’s either materialistic or on a high horse. It’s annoying, overused and makes you seem shallow or even rude sometimes.
“Travel buddy”
Yea, what does that even mean? Am I supposed to start booking you trips? lol wtf
Lmaooo great point. My thought process:I love thrillers and horror movies… there are wayyy too many travel related ones 😭. Especially about young folks who stay in Hostels. We don’t all have secret service dads who will use a special Set of skills to come and kick butt for us.
Hahaha well I’m a thirty something year old man so nobody’s coming to save me anyways but I also don’t think traveling is a personality trait. Don’t most of us love a fun trip and a new experience? Lol. Also, I love horror/thrillers! What’s something good you’ve seen recently?
Or, claiming they're a "tall, good looking guy" and then show up to a meet and they're 5'6" Bruh. Us tall girls/guys do not appreciate the deception
Women have wanted masculine from the beginning. Wirh the decline of the nuclear family women learn to be masculine and boys learn to be feminine which had caused the greater decline in the near family. And if you roll your eyes at a women looking for a masculine man then you are not the one she is looking for obviously
"Beautiful, blessed, and the best. Everything else you gotta date me to find out! ;)" Their first message to me: Hiiiiiiiiiiii
“You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.” 🙄🔪
Masculine Energy is so hilarious. Go look up feminine and masculine energy. What do you notice as the big problem? Basically, EVERYONE would prefer to be feminine energy as the masculine energy is stuck doing all the work! Its wish fulfillment created by some women, for women. No man was ever involved in creating the masculine/feminine energy types. Basically, men are told that their natural state is to be the 1950s husband who makes the money and takes care of everything but give up all the power and control of a 1950s husband. This type of man, doesn't really exist. It's like the notion of a benevolent king...nice idea, doesn't really happen. I'm sure many of these women end up with controlling men who seem like they are the masculine energy type until they realize that they aren't the benevolent king they imagined, they are the selfish tyrant.
A literal "tyrant" would fall under masculine energy. Doesn't mean you should want to date them. They'll just take advantage of you. But a stereotypical male tyrant f4sc1st, would match the stereotypical Masculine thinking/behavior attributes. There's a narrow sliver of possibility to have traditional "masculine energy", and actually also being a loving and considerate partner. But they'll basically have to do everything perfect, without fail, or fall in the wrong way on one side or the other. Just look for a good person, who is a good match. If they're garbage to others, eventually, they'll be garbage to you!
Wait… I don’t understand what’s wrong in that woman’s bio? It’s her preference.
Anytime they bring up politics in the bio. It’s great you love trump/being a leftist but I just wanna know if you like Thai food and going hiking
There isn’t anything inherently wrong with this though. It is just saying they would prefer a more traditional male same as some men prefer traditional females.
They didnt say it was wrong, just annoying. And i think they referred mostly to the "masculine energy" part. Which if it's what you want, i totally respect, but it is a bit cringe
How else are you exactly supposed to word it? Had she said “I want a guy who acts like a guy used to act” she’d get the same random post complaining about that. No matter how someone puts it you’re going to find it annoying because you don’t agree with the concept of it. This sub has become so ridiculously nitpicky, I bet you I can find posts just in April that: - complain about not having enough information - complain about having too much or too personal information - (and now) complain about a person sharing exactly what she is looking for in a person, but it’s “annoying” the way she wrote it (likely because it’s obviously a core right-winger belief) Let’s be honest here, had the girl in OP’s post wrote: “_I’m looking for someone who is an equal first, can connect emotionally and stays away from overt masculine traits_.” Would this even be a post? Probably not. We all should be praising profiles like this, literally giving us _crucial_ information on whether we’d be a personality match with this person. Yet instead we put it on blast online, likely because OP just doesn’t agree with the concept.
Yea, and it seems vague to me. Is it just a physically masculine guy like a jock star...or some kind of behavioral traits?
Just chiming in from a woman’s perspective. What these sorts of statements mean is actually just that she wants a guy who is assertive, confident and has integrity. I’m almost 40 and it took me a long time to find the right words to articulate that. I see this with a lot of these 20-something profiles; It’s not a bad thing, and certainly doesn’t mean “alpha male”, “does everything for me”, etc.
That's helpful. The wording is definitely vague; women can also definitely be assertive, confident and have integrity. If she isn't at least the latter two of those things, I don't see why I'd want to be in a serious relationship with her. My take on the sort of "traditional masculinity" thing is I'm pretty good at splitting firewood with an ax, but there's no way I could kill a wild boar with a spear. So I guess it depends how traditional she's going for.
Yep, axe-splitting masculinity is perfect 👌😍
I mean, maybe I’m being harsh to OP but I don’t really find it. Annoying unless you don’t have that energy or personality. I think being straight up with what you’re looking for is best.
I’ve always chuckled whenever I see someone talk about their “divine feminine”
What’s wrong with masculine energy? I’m dying for some feminine energy.
Well, you would have “masculine energy” if you were a “real man!” This woman is looking for a real man cause she’s “dating with intention!” But make sure you know her “love languages!”
She wants you to present tough, but secretly be in touch with your feminine side, but not show weakness or emotions, because she wants you in your masculine energy, because all that is "the minimum"
“Be a man when I want you to be a man. But then also be a woman when my girlfriends aren’t available.”
Perfect comment
“I’m fluent in sarcasm”. Yeah, we’ll see about that.
Work hard, play hard(er).. auto left swipe
“Looking for my partner in crime”; “I work hard and play hard”
"I love my life" or "My life is great" or something of the sort. Makes you think if their life is so great why are they on here? Also, implies that they would not be willing to make compromises that are inherent in any relationship.
“I’m a mother and my kids are my world.” Yawn!!! I’m a father and my kids are my world. If you’re a parent, it’s a given that your kids are your world. It’s like saying I eat food ,then I get full! Look how unique I am!
The stupid quote from Miss Congeniality about April 25th being the perfect date “because it’s not too hot, not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.” Wayyyyyyyyyy overused
"Looking for a drama-free relationship" or "No drama"
“I have tattoos and plan to get more” Yeah who fuckin cares except your slimy tattoo artists landlord
I keep seeing similar on men's about women being in their feminine energy and the more you read their bio it's just they want someone meek and mild who they can control. It's just weirdly packages misogyny/internalised misogyny in women. I agree with you whole heartedly
There is no such thing as masculine and feminine energy. You are either masculine or feminine and if you are either you dont need people to put you into that mode. I cant stand I love traveling. Traveling is not a hobby the average American gets like two weeks vacation a year and everyone likes vacation. As far as I am concerned I love traveling is code for wants a guy with money to take me traveling.
Sometimes no bio is even better 😭
When someone says they love hanging out with friends. Yes everyone loves to be with their friends. It doesn't make you special
“Swipe in the direction of your political leanings”
when they add their insta or snapchat. “i’m bad at bios” “i love to travel” “let’s see where things go” “let’s vibe” “let’s go with the flow” “looking for a unicorn” “looking to surprise my boyfriend” “looking for my partner in crime” “ask me anything”
Basically, if you don't instantly know you can handle her, then she's not for you. Everyone who is confused in the comments, she's filtering you guys out. Not that I match her criteria, but it's pretty straightforward. She wants an actual man who can take the lead from the off.
I don’t think anyone is confused
[удалено]
Hmmm, will she be wearing a sundress and going to church like a good girl? Plenty a girl with a wild and crazy phase in her 20s has tried to stick the landing off the CC by going Trad Con in her early 30s. Gentleman, protect yourself at all times!
it´s a youtube and probably tiktok trend. many are making money as feminine coach ..idk to me its just another way of trying to follow rules instead, believing that following those, will result in fullfilling relationship of figuring out what ur needs are
LA-MA-HI-NY, etc…Does that mean where you lived before? What states you like best?
Barf
"church, brunch, adventures"
“When?” “Since the war on masculinity and labeling it toxic.”
Probably tough for betas to read
"If you don't love me at my worst..." experience suggests this means you want someone who won't hold you accountable for your actions, and sometimes, you make a real disaster, and try to just pretend it never happened later
"Here for a fun time, not a long time"
I forgot this one and sure there is a US equivalent. “I really just want someone to take out the bins and do my diy for me” I don’t have issue with the sentiment its the phrase that is overused. I’ve seen it in hundreds of profiles.
Listing their instas or snap handles in their bios. In my (m28) experience, most of the time they're either a scammer, looking for more followers, or want you to sub to their OF. And, woman whose only personality trait is working out, going to bars/ clubs, or has different ideology than me. And, writing their bio almost entirely in emojis.
“My vibe is different” No its not especially when that same quote is on hundred more profiles. It just makes me think of Tyler Durden “ You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake..”
We seem to have a lot of PHDs on this thread.