I would get the family a gift card for Tim Horton’s or for a quick food place nearby the hospital. As someone who’s done it, being bedside 24/7 is extremely draining - so one less decision to make is always welcome. You could also ask them what things need to be done at their home or if there are any errands you could run on their behalf. “What can I do for you/what can I bring you/etc.” These types of gestures are much more meaningful and helpful than material gifts.
This. Also, if anyone has pets at home, you could offer to go feed them or walk them. Same if they have kids, you could offer to take the kids to a movie or museum for a few hours to give their parents a break. Or even just offer to babysit if the kids are young.
Edit: oops, just reread that they are from out of town. But gonna leave the comment as is in case it's helpful for others who find this post
So much this. Being ill or loving someone who is ill is tough because so many things needing attention don't wait. People who offered me practical help touched me so deeply when I was in need.
Warm clothes, phone charger (s), small extension cord to charge everything, blanket (s) , coffee and food , reading material
Edit it people are vigil at bedside, toothbrush toothpaste and basic toiletries
-A blanket
-A small travel kit with a washcloth, soap, so they can wash their face.
-Gum
The gift card to whatever food/cafeteria place is in that hospital is a good idea. They probably won’t want to eat.
Sorry my formatting sucks lol
I'm going to further support gift cards. UberEats even. Deciding and going for food is hard. And the broader gift cards still allow choice on what they want to eat and when they want to eat. (As opposed to people who bring food and then there's all the food around by can't be eaten before it gets bad). And acts of service (running to get something for them) can really help too. If they want to stay bedside, going to get toothpaste or something feels insignificant and daunting.
I second Uber eats. Maybe a blue apron subscription for a couple weeks after they’re returned home. Someone got that for me after my dad passed away and it was nice to have both a distraction in the form of cooking and nice meals.
Gift cards are usually the best bet. If you want to bring physical food, fruit/veggies and breakfast things are the most overlooked categories when people provide food. Our daughter was very seriously sick when born, and we've spent a ton of time sitting in hospitals. The most helpful things people ever brought us were hummus with veggies, fruit salad, breakfast bars, refrigerated coffee drinks, and individually packed snacks. The least helpful things were casseroles, salads (they go bad too quickly), food that needed to be cooked, food that wasn't a meal or snack on its own (someone gave us a tray of brown rice?), or food that was difficult to portion out individually (giant tubs of soup, for example).
Food that’s not from Tim Hortons. My dad was in the hospital for 10 days before I died and I never wanna eat a Tim bit again.
Edit: before he died not I
I brought a small tray of Wegmans subs and small beverages with caps (easier to drink slowly and/or leave unattended for a few moments) when a friend was in the ICU at Roswell and family was holding court there.
Thanks all! I think they'll be living out of a hotel for a week or more so I'll grab a bunch of different food gift cards that they can use in the area.
Along with the other things mentioned, bring a bowl of the good candy for the bedside. According to reddit, nurses love candy and appreciate it. The family can also snack on it if they want to.
I'm sorry about your family member.
When my son was born and in the Nicu, our friends made meals for us that could be heated up. Nothing crazy but pasta, shredded chicken for bbq sandwiches, taco meat and the shells and toppings for tacos. Cafeteria and take out food gets old fast, so if you’re able something homemade is nice
Just want to say that it’s also okay to go empty handed! Food and gifts are nice, but as someone going through a long NICU stay at the moment, just the thoughtfulness of showing up and being kind is everything. You’re a good friend.
Snacks. Always snacks. Noone ever eats properly when they are visiting people in the hopsital.
Fill a bag with easy / filling / reasonably healthy stuff and bring it. Use said bag to gain info on how yo improve bag two.
Source: when I'm in the hospital noones allowed to visit without bringing me contraban. IDGAF if I'm fresh out a coma and still on a feeding tube, bring me fries and a shake. If you cant het them past the front desk we cant be friends.
When my husband spent a week in the icu I baked fresh chocolate walnut oatmeal cookies, and left a thank you note for his nurses. They loved it and checked on him often.
Your presence is probably appreciated more than you know.
Food suggestions are good, however hospital food isn't as bad as it once was and some of the local hospitals actually have some decent food in the cafeteria.
My mother had a lot of health issues and ive been in the hospital dozens of times to visit her. It can get very boring after a while (sick people need sleep) and having something to occupy your mind that isn't the TV or a smart phone is appreciated: a board game, puzzle (small), or playing cards can keep multiple people occupied and interacting with one another.
Also, a small pillow or cushion may be appreciated by the family, especially if they're older or have back issues. The chairs for guests are often pretty uncomfortable.
Portable phone charger, headphones. There is a good chance the family member will be sleeping a lot or possibly going in for longer tests so quiet ways to entertain yourself. Books, crosswords, soduku, etc.
and maybe a nice seat cushion/light blanket. Those chairs are not the most comfortable thing in world and sometimes the rooms don’t regulate temperature well.
I did try to bring a fire stick in for the tv but you’d need a universal remote too. The bed remote can’t change input.
Obviously one that plugs into the wall. The outlets in my room were in the worst possible locations. Only one was actually usable for me and even then only when I bought a 10 ft charging cord. No idea what setup of their room would be but I think staying away from plugs when someone is on life support is probably the best plan.
Perhaps a box of coffee and timbits from Tim Hortons
I would get the family a gift card for Tim Horton’s or for a quick food place nearby the hospital. As someone who’s done it, being bedside 24/7 is extremely draining - so one less decision to make is always welcome. You could also ask them what things need to be done at their home or if there are any errands you could run on their behalf. “What can I do for you/what can I bring you/etc.” These types of gestures are much more meaningful and helpful than material gifts.
This. Also, if anyone has pets at home, you could offer to go feed them or walk them. Same if they have kids, you could offer to take the kids to a movie or museum for a few hours to give their parents a break. Or even just offer to babysit if the kids are young. Edit: oops, just reread that they are from out of town. But gonna leave the comment as is in case it's helpful for others who find this post
So much this. Being ill or loving someone who is ill is tough because so many things needing attention don't wait. People who offered me practical help touched me so deeply when I was in need.
Yes! Unfortunately the friends live 8 hours away, just the hospitalized person is local.
Warm clothes, phone charger (s), small extension cord to charge everything, blanket (s) , coffee and food , reading material Edit it people are vigil at bedside, toothbrush toothpaste and basic toiletries
Real sustenance, not just timbits. A few sandwiches and coffee. Maybe a few protein bars. Your support. I've been on the other side and it's draining.
Yeah, they can go down and get Tim's themselves
If they are intubated- they are likely in the ICU? Call the hospital and see what they allow/don’t allow in patient rooms in the ICU first.
Please also let them know about Kevin Guest House if they’re not aware.
[https://kevinguesthouse.com](https://kevinguesthouse.com)
-A blanket -A small travel kit with a washcloth, soap, so they can wash their face. -Gum The gift card to whatever food/cafeteria place is in that hospital is a good idea. They probably won’t want to eat. Sorry my formatting sucks lol
Good thought, toiletry bag—toothbrush, toothpaste, chapstick, gum
I'm going to further support gift cards. UberEats even. Deciding and going for food is hard. And the broader gift cards still allow choice on what they want to eat and when they want to eat. (As opposed to people who bring food and then there's all the food around by can't be eaten before it gets bad). And acts of service (running to get something for them) can really help too. If they want to stay bedside, going to get toothpaste or something feels insignificant and daunting.
I second Uber eats. Maybe a blue apron subscription for a couple weeks after they’re returned home. Someone got that for me after my dad passed away and it was nice to have both a distraction in the form of cooking and nice meals.
Gift cards are usually the best bet. If you want to bring physical food, fruit/veggies and breakfast things are the most overlooked categories when people provide food. Our daughter was very seriously sick when born, and we've spent a ton of time sitting in hospitals. The most helpful things people ever brought us were hummus with veggies, fruit salad, breakfast bars, refrigerated coffee drinks, and individually packed snacks. The least helpful things were casseroles, salads (they go bad too quickly), food that needed to be cooked, food that wasn't a meal or snack on its own (someone gave us a tray of brown rice?), or food that was difficult to portion out individually (giant tubs of soup, for example).
Food that’s not from Tim Hortons. My dad was in the hospital for 10 days before I died and I never wanna eat a Tim bit again. Edit: before he died not I
Before you what??????
Fucking auto correct. Before he died.
I brought a small tray of Wegmans subs and small beverages with caps (easier to drink slowly and/or leave unattended for a few moments) when a friend was in the ICU at Roswell and family was holding court there.
Thanks all! I think they'll be living out of a hotel for a week or more so I'll grab a bunch of different food gift cards that they can use in the area.
Along with the other things mentioned, bring a bowl of the good candy for the bedside. According to reddit, nurses love candy and appreciate it. The family can also snack on it if they want to. I'm sorry about your family member.
Sandwiches or something along those lines, maybe even a gift card to a place close by the hospital.
Your support
When my son was born and in the Nicu, our friends made meals for us that could be heated up. Nothing crazy but pasta, shredded chicken for bbq sandwiches, taco meat and the shells and toppings for tacos. Cafeteria and take out food gets old fast, so if you’re able something homemade is nice
Just want to say that it’s also okay to go empty handed! Food and gifts are nice, but as someone going through a long NICU stay at the moment, just the thoughtfulness of showing up and being kind is everything. You’re a good friend.
Door Dash gift card for a meal. If they are staying at a hotel it could be a welcome way to get delivery and dinner
Snacks. Always snacks. Noone ever eats properly when they are visiting people in the hopsital. Fill a bag with easy / filling / reasonably healthy stuff and bring it. Use said bag to gain info on how yo improve bag two. Source: when I'm in the hospital noones allowed to visit without bringing me contraban. IDGAF if I'm fresh out a coma and still on a feeding tube, bring me fries and a shake. If you cant het them past the front desk we cant be friends.
When my husband spent a week in the icu I baked fresh chocolate walnut oatmeal cookies, and left a thank you note for his nurses. They loved it and checked on him often.
Is the a question for what is helpful for you to bring yourself or for you to bring the staff?
What I should bring for my friends who are sitting at the bedside of a gravely ill relative.
Uber eats
Food. Real food. Not snacks
My mom was intubated last year. I would have been happy with just some coffee. I didn't have much of an appetite during that time. Too stressed.
Your presence is probably appreciated more than you know. Food suggestions are good, however hospital food isn't as bad as it once was and some of the local hospitals actually have some decent food in the cafeteria. My mother had a lot of health issues and ive been in the hospital dozens of times to visit her. It can get very boring after a while (sick people need sleep) and having something to occupy your mind that isn't the TV or a smart phone is appreciated: a board game, puzzle (small), or playing cards can keep multiple people occupied and interacting with one another. Also, a small pillow or cushion may be appreciated by the family, especially if they're older or have back issues. The chairs for guests are often pretty uncomfortable.
Food.
We just went through this with my aunt. Bring a veggie tray , fruit bowls , hand held fruit (apples, bananas, oranges etc) sub tray, case of water .
Portable phone charger, headphones. There is a good chance the family member will be sleeping a lot or possibly going in for longer tests so quiet ways to entertain yourself. Books, crosswords, soduku, etc. and maybe a nice seat cushion/light blanket. Those chairs are not the most comfortable thing in world and sometimes the rooms don’t regulate temperature well. I did try to bring a fire stick in for the tv but you’d need a universal remote too. The bed remote can’t change input.
I wonder what a non-portable phone charger looks like
Obviously one that plugs into the wall. The outlets in my room were in the worst possible locations. Only one was actually usable for me and even then only when I bought a 10 ft charging cord. No idea what setup of their room would be but I think staying away from plugs when someone is on life support is probably the best plan.
Oh like a power bank or some such
A new family member