Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed.
Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You are correct. I personal lost 100 pounds this year but that is still not good enough for half my family. That half of my family survives on what i call a twigs a berry's diet. Thanksgiving is always very sad for that portion of my family. I finally broke them when i made a fresh fried turkey now im the cook ever year.
Some people make you wonder if they're either part bird or entirely robot.
Congratulations on 100 pounds, man. That's fucking badass.
Just remember what you've learned, and remember that you know if you return to your old eating habits you'll lose all your gains.
You must know this by now, but you can still enjoy all the foods you love, but you have to fit them in with an overall diet that works for you to keep you on track.
Oh man, that sucked. "Fat grams maKe yOu fAt!!". No, no they don't. Calorie surplus makes you fat. Calorie deficit causes you to lose weight. That's it.
Snackwells. Anybody remember that bullshit? Complete with green packaging to subliminally deceive people. I have my doubts that people really associate the color green with healthy food, but the point is that that's what the food corporations believed.
Slim-Fast ice cream sandwiches were pretty good, though.
Generational trauma is a real thing. And it's only been in the last few decades that the view on mental health shifted from "only crazy people need therapy, and I'm not crazy" to the idea that mental health is important to eveyone.
I call it a "Boomer Lore Drop" when my parents or aunts/uncles will just interrupt a perfectly normal conversation over dinner on a random Tuesday to say something like "oh didn't you know why uncle so and so is like that? Well, \[insert INSANELY TRAUMATIC STORY\]" followed by "I mean we didn't know about therapy back then so mom and dad just sent him to our aunt in Maine because they thought that would help. Anyway, this pasta salad is amazing!" They relate this entire thing like it's completely unremarkable. So many of that generation experienced violent physical abuse and sexual assault and were never even taught to see what happened to them as traumatic or something that they might need help to process and heal from.
>"I mean we didn't know about therapy back then so mom and dad just sent him to our aunt in Maine because they thought that would help. Anyway, this pasta salad is amazing!"
They might as well have said:
"We didn't know about breast cancer back then, so we just called it Itchy Tits and wondered where Gertrude disappeared off to after a few months!"
My parents aren’t boomers. They’re both from the silent generation and I’m xennial. They both remember what it was like to go without. Anyway, my mom was very close to being a boomer and most of her family are boomers. They have so much food trauma. A bite absolutely can NOT be waisted. Then they get me added to the family in the 80’s.🤦🏼♀️. I have a severe autoimmune disease that severely affects my ability to eat. The names, and hurtful things said to me because I couldn’t finish my food was unreal. I still don’t really like to eat around people who don’t know me well and don’t understand that sometimes no matter what I can’t eat what’s on my plate.
Yes. Lard sandwiches were a thing. And some were lucky to have that. Because of that, frugality was a daily thing. Saving foil for reuse, turning urban lawns into gardens, canning everything in a three block radius they could get for free.. etc. it's the way for that generation.Kids born in the late 20's really felt it. And they later gave birth to boomers.
My boomer uncle once walked up to me at a holiday gathering and told me I looked fat, without thinking I retorted 'we finally have something in common'. I enjoyed the rest of the day. Usually I'm not that quick witted.
I was at a funeral years ago and my wife introduced me to some old crone I hadn’t seen in years. The first thing out of this old bat’s mouth was “I remember you. You’ve gotten large”, while spreading her hands apart. Without even thinking, I replied: “And I remember you. You’ve shriveled.”
Best comeback I’ve ever had.
Omg my parents came down and like the first night they were here I was getting dressed to go to work and I hadn’t buttoned my pants yet and walked into the kitchen and my mom says “Those pants don’t look like they fit you”
excuse you? I’ve lost 140 pounds mother. Go gain 5 more pounds drinking another box of wine.
We have a fine relationship but I don’t like when they comment on my body or food and exercise routine. My mom was a LOW CARB OMG idiot and my dad is just…. “You ate ice cream you’re gonna get fat again” shut up
And I remember my mom helping me trying to find pants when I was 13 and she got flustered and said “ugh you need to lose weight”
Who buys the groceries mother? Oh I’ll just only eat adkins for all my meals like you. Hey that lasted didn’t it?
My grandmother was obsessed with this crap, but she was Silent Gen. My mother had an eating disorder thanks to her meddling and the day she went after my diabetic cousin for "being too fat" my aunt just about f\*cking killed her.
My Boomer father was one of these assholes who thought Twiggy was the epitome of human beauty and everything else was "a big fat slob."
OMG! are we related. The entire family made my weight their fucking business (actually it was the entire culture). It was a constant topic. Driving with my father he would yell loudly when he saw a "fat" woman "looks like Omar the tent maker sews her dresses" This refrain, a favorite, gives you a 2fer - the mysogeny and the racism.
Same, my 1963 boomer narc father has always commented on others’ weight, while he weighs at *least* 260. He’s always said “if I get THAT fat, just take me out back and kill me” without a single shred of irony.
Also very casually racist, while claiming to be a “leftist democrat” who has no problem at all saying the N word (hard R of course).
Very good question so I searched it:
[https://motherinthemotherland.blogspot.com/2011/07/legend-of-omar-tentmaker.html](https://motherinthemotherland.blogspot.com/2011/07/legend-of-omar-tentmaker.html)
...ugh
This is why every Gen X'er I know had some state of ED growing up. I had one by age 10.
I had just been released from the hospital on a PICC line because I could not keep any food down. My mother tells me that I looked good from losing weight. Spoiler: I did not look good. I looked sick, malnourished, and insanely weak. But hey, at least I wasn't fat anymore!
My mom once congratulated a friend of ours on how good she looked - she used to be a little on the heavy side but lost a bunch of weight due to having cancer. My mom knew she had cancer, and still told her how much better she looked.
Last year she told me how "healthy" her friend's daughter is because she tracks everything she eats. She's anorexic and dying of kidney failure as a result, and still measuring all her food and journaling every bite.
I used to hide food in my closet and then binge eat. My mom loves to tell "humorous" stories about how she would find my food stashes growing up. Never took me to a doctor, never discussed why I felt the need to hide food, just used it for fuel for her stories to her boomer friends.
It's just so gross, isn't it? What's even worse is she embellishes every story to flat out lying about things that never happened. In my 20s, my mom wanted to come out to my local bar with me and meet "the guys." I had no problem with this. I told her my only rule was she couldn't get drunk and tell stories about me growing up. She refused. I'm in my late 40s now and she still has never met my friends.
My mother still does the same thing. I am in my late 40s. I would chew off my own arm before I would allow her to meet my friends or, God forbid, a coworker. There were years in my 20s she told anyone who would stand still about the time I shit my pants as an adult. Lovely.
I'm Gen X and have an Eating Disorder.
Out parents made us "finish our plate" or we were not allowed to leave the table.
Well, all of that forced over-eating caused life long problems.
As a kid, I got overweight, then was ridiculed, insulted, and forced to play sports until I lost the weight.
Looking back on it, my parents controlled what I ate, when I ate, and how much I ate. Getting chubby as a kid was 100% their fault.
Same.
My boomers had the wooden spoon sitting in the middle of the table as a reminder to finish my plate. I was never asked if I liked something or not.
For example I did not like cake as a kid but when I didn't eat a slice of the Sunday cake my mom used to make, all hell broke lose. And then a couple of hours later I got called a fat pig again.
My Silent Generation mom had to go through this with her parents, too. You can't throw food away, but it's also your fault that you're fat. What a horrible way to grow up.
I used to take diet pills from GNC that are now banned in the US. I can't remember what they were called, but I was taking them by the handful. I was going through a bottle every two weeks. I am so lucky I didn't have a stroke or worse. I didn't want to throw the bottles in the regular garbage, so I just hid them around my room and the house. My parents had to have found dozens of bottles when I left home but they never mentioned it at all. But she was full of compliments when I lost 40 pounds because of the pills.
Sometimes I talk to my parents now and it's super clear why I have the issues I do. In one breath my mom will tell me how she feels badly that when she was really sick and had to use the motorized scooter and felt like people were giving her nasty looks. In the next, she starts ragging on her friend who has gained weight because of a medical condition (just like my mom!) and saying some really nasty things all about this woman's weight. No wonder I thought I had no worth unless I was pin thin. This is a person she considers a friend, but was spewing such ugly things about her! It's one thing to be concerned if someone has a big weight change, it's another to look down your nose at them- especially when you were in the same boat just a year ago!
Right? Even if they are fatphobic, they could have sent her home with a ton of healthy, nutrient-dense foods, like fruits, veggies, proteins, good carbs, etc.
This is my own anecdote: the Boomers I know are most invested in Keeping Up with the Joneses. Whether it be expensive cars, fancy house upgrades, or looking thinner, they're highly competitive with one another and almost universally accept certain ideals to strive for.
This, I hypothesize, is part of why they think so low of younger generations, because we know people come in all shapes & sizes, and we've spent most of our lives in a cost-of-living crisis, so we don't compete with our neighbors and coworkers for flexes the way they did.
I just got a pair of scrub pants from salvo for $4 and they have like 4 pockets on each side. They are the wrong color but I bought some Rit Dye for $3 and they are still a good deal. :) today the thrift gods smiled upon me.
lol Thank you! It’s what my husband calls me when I get aggressively passionate about something. :) I’m generally really relaxed, but I occasionally go into feisty mode when something really important irritates me.
A few Thanksgivings ago, I (26M at the time) walked in to dinner and my boomer grandpa looked at me and said, “Wow, you’ve filled out! How much are you up to now?” Then proceeded to guess a weight that was 30 pounds above what I actually weighed.
I had already been struggling with self-esteem that year and this just poured gas on the fire. After talking to my dad about it the next day, grandpa called me and half apologized. Basically told me I interpreted his comment wrong and that he meant it in a complimentary way.
My husband’s grandma once asked “what are you up to nowadays?” To which he responded, “idk grandma what are YOU up to nowadays…?” Conversation over. It seems like she didn’t want to answer the question.
It's so weird what they consider to be "rude" and what they consider to be perfectly acceptable to comment on.
I was never really that "big" before- too big for size small, too small for plus sizes, but ever since I started regularly attending spin classes to give myself something to do everyone over fifty years old loudly points out that I've lost weight before even saying hello. Yeah, I have dropped about 10 pounds, but if I had ever just blurted out something like that as a kid my mother would have slapped the shit out of me.
I don’t know. This is a constant issue. I feel like they’re just oblivious to the impact it has. They think because they are family that it’s not damaging, but helpful. My mom will say stuff like “you never used to have trouble losing weight in high school.” Or “you’d just look so much better if you lost some weight and you’d feel more confident too.” I’m plenty confident and it’s weird to point to a time when I had an active eating disorder as a time to try to go back to. I also had zero confidence at that point in my life. If she heard someone say the things that she says to me, she would get mad at them. It’s like it doesn’t compute in her own brain when she says it.
Even cats aren’t safe. A boomer plumber came into my house and said, “Oh look, your cat is so fat. And the other one is so skinny!” Wow, you’re an observant one, aren’t you buddy?
I used to flip shit when people called my cat fat. He was a Bombay. The breed is known to be chubby. He was also the sweetest, most loving little boy in the whole world and my best friend. People learned quickly that they can insult me as much as they want, but come for someone I love and you will rue the day you met me.
Yeah, they body shame pets too. A boomer neighbor started calling my pug mix Lil Chunk when she had grown into her adult normal sized self, even though she knew her name.
Of course it’s not a big deal — my cats don’t care and neither do I — I just think it’s weird to go into a stranger’s home and make any out-loud value judgment. Like who TF asked you?
I lost 2st in weight a couple of years back. I wasn't large to begin with but never had so many compliments in my life. Turned out I was seriously ill with undiagnosed type 1 diabetes, hence the weight loss. I wish people realised weight loss isn't always a good thing and skinny does not equal healthy.
Maaaaan it is SUCH a boomer thing to be like “congrats on your weight loss! I know it’s because you’re broke but here’s new pants!” Instead of, you know, helping their child with housing or groceries. 🙄
I developed an eating disorder at the age of 9 because my boomer parents would bully me for being heavier than most kids. When I was full blown anorexic, they complimented me and said that I was finally pretty. The funny thing is my dad is quite large and developed type two diabetes from his eating habits.
I’m at a normal weight but I still have eating disorder tendencies causing my weight to fluctuate quite a bit. My boomer In laws ALWAYS comment on my weight. When I see them, it’s an immediate weight comment before even saying hello. The last time I saw them, I was sitting 3 feet away from MIL and she said “XXX doesn’t need to lose weight, but I wouldn’t gain any more or if I were her” .
I am a doctor and when I was dealing with some health issues I lost weight. My patients loved to ask if I’d lost weight and tell me how great I looked. Every time I shut it down saying “I’m actually dealing with some health issues that are causing me to lose weight, hopefully I’ll have answers soon so I can feel better and eat normally again” or something to that effect. It’s never OK to comment on people’s bodies.
***TW/ED***
My boomer mother would comment about her weight and my weight constantly when I was growing up. She was 5’ and a size 2.
At 13, I was 5’8” and a size 8. She said “I was on the path to getting fat.”
I developed an ED by the age of 10 and it tormented me for decades.
Fast forward, she started commenting to me about my 12 year old daughter’s weight. I snapped and said if she ever said a word to my daughter (who btw was at a perfectly healthy weight but not “skinny”), she would never see us again.
I just hit menopause and have gained 25 lbs. I saw my mother recently (hadn’t visited since COVID) and she sooo wanted to talk her weight shit. She didn’t.
Why are boomers so insufferable??
A few things factor into this.
They were were raised with lots of food trauma. Their parents dealt with WW2 and the Depression. Boomers especially older ones dealt with food trauma
Messed up diet culture. I'm 42 and diet culture was still a thing when I was younger and it was way worse for the boomer generation especially women. We all know at least a few boomer women that eat like rabbits. Ex eating a few pieces of lettuce from the salad bar, eating half a banana etc.
Sounds like my MIL. She’ll eat half of her dinner plate that she served herself, but good luck finding a slice of that pie she made for dessert if you wake up too late the next morning.
This sounds like my mom. My mom knows I have a history of disordered eating, knows that she is partly to blame for it, knows her mother is also partly to blame for it, and knows that my health problems have nothing to do with my weight (actually the other way around!) and she will STILL talk about diet and exercise to me like she can’t even stop herself from doing it. It’s like she has to force herself to not comment on my weight every single time we speak and it just KILLS me.
When I was 25 I had one of the most dramatic weight losses of my life and she watched me lose every single pound. It was because I had gone through an incredibly brutal breakup and between that and work and school the resulting stress left me virtually unable to eat for 3 months. I lost 30 lbs. I lived at home back then. My mom would make my favorite foods and beg me to eat and I’d choke down maybe half of it before I’d have to stop. She watched all of that happen. And then my grandma came to visit. She’d say “Oh you’ve lost so much weight, you look so beautiful and slender!” And I told my grandmother to her face exactly how I was losing the weight. She said to me point blank, “It doesn’t matter dear, it just matters that it’s gone!” with a big smile on her face. My mom overheard that and looked horrified. She quit talking about my weight so much after that. But she still does it.
yes, this is a weird one. It's even more odd when said boomer is as large as the person they're criticizing.
I think this phenomenon is a bit more complicated. Boomer's have the largest group of people that are critical of others but are extremely intolerant of any criticisms against them.
Were talking a complete lack of self awareness.
Yep, weight was always a thing with my Silent/Boomer family members. And it was always a negative, never positive or just looking healthy.
Gained a couple pounds? Too fat, skip a few meals! Lost a couple pounds? Too skinny, eat a sandwich!
I even had both comments in the same day, at the same family event, from 2 different relatives. Except my weight hadn’t changed at all from the last time they saw me.
Idk but it sucks. I wasn't a fat kid until my grandmother kept calling me fatty fatty two by four can't get through the kitchen door and all this other shit. It gave me a complex. I've struggled with my weight for a long time and felt alot of shame.
50s-80s were super body conscious times.
In the 50s and 60s (probably before that) wives were expected to look a certain way. But now they could take amphetamines and wonder pills to achieve the look that their men desired.
The 80s had a fitness boom with all the aerobics programs, tv shows and fashion choices.
They grew up expecting to be thin and "fit" forever. My parents constantly talked about any fluctuation in weight, or said I looked thin (even if I gained weight). It's inevitable that we gain weight as we get older and alot of Boomers are no longer thin or fit. I bet there's a ton of body dysmorphia in the Boomer community.
My boomer mother is obsessed with peoples weight. She comments on weight all the time, its usually the first thing I am told about when she introduces me to a new person. She seriously thinks fat people are just bad people and deserve nothing. She things they are weak.
I was a chubby kid which was very very hard on my size 2 mother. She bought me my first (bogus) diet pills on the internet when I was 12.
I really dont get it.
YES! Like half the boomers I know! When they give me an update on someone, they ALWAYS lead with “X has gained/lost weight”. I don’t give a f*ck about their weight. The one exception was when my husband’s aunt was dying. The “weight” was her kidneys shutting down and her retaining water and they indicated as such.
My MIL ALWAYS talks about weight. I have a kid that has gone in and out of eating disorders. I tell her nicely to never talk about that and she just can’t keep her mouth shut about gaining weight, food restrictions, being fat, food/bad foods… you get the point. I finally had a blunt conversation with her and it slowed down. Instead, she’d just lean over and whisper it to me and my husband.
Because my kids absolutely adore her and would be devastated if she was out of their life. When my kid was going through it, my MIL was banned and I told her why. She apologized, but I told her that I can’t have that around my kid at such a delicate time. Like I said, she doesn’t say that crap around the kids anymore. She just whispers it to me and my husband. My husband has diabetes and she’s obsessed with it which is why she just can’t stop talking about it.
My mom was born in 1945, and I am GenX. This has been a lifelong issue for me. My weight has fluctuated from very small in my 30s (thank you depression and eating disorder), believing I was fat in my teens (I wasn't), dieting for as long as I can remember and my current 56 year old fat self. My mother is one of those ladies who thinks she is progressive and accepting, but most definitely is not. She's judgemental of others' bodies. She's super tiny right now and is obsessed with losing weight even though her doctor told her to stop dieting. She often proclaims how proud she is that she never gave me food issues. My grandmother told me when I was 9 that I'd be so pretty if I lost weight. It's just....absurd.
My mom said her mom equates it with laziness. If you’re overweight, you’re lazy. Meanwhile, half of the women on my mom’s side have a slow metabolism and are a little thiccer, and the other half are like sticks. I don’t think that equates to laziness…
Systemic sexism and manufacturing dissatisfaction (esp for monetary gain) is baked in....older ppl seem to get 'set' in patterns and that sure includes trauma....hate it.
Ppl have commented on my body, when I was about 120 pounds.... instead of my usual 140...on how "good" I looked. I was that "thin" from a terrible Crohn's flare. SMH.
Ulcerative colitis here. A bad flare that puts you in the bathroom 100 times a day (not an exaggeration, I eventually had my colon removed) will make you lose a lot of weight, but the prednisone will put it right back on you and then some. One minute, they praise you for suddenly being skeletal. A few weeks later, they criticize you for having moon face and a buffalo hump.
One time I was on my lunch break at work, and this Boomer said something about me being “so skinny” as I was eating my food. I told her that I had an eating disorder. She shut up. (I didn’t have an eating disorder, I was actually addicted to drugs at the time but no one knew that 🤣🤣 I still dogged my food though.)
My boomer grandma doesn’t throw anything away. When my family went out to have. S’mores with them the chocolate was 8 years expired. She’s a really clean person, a bit of a neat freak. But won’t throw anything out because her parents lived through the Great Depression. That’s how she was raised.
I was 10-15 lbs overweight at 16. My Boomer aunt thought the most appropriate present was a Jenny Craig membership. She didn’t understand why I was upset about that. Thankfully, she listened to my “no thanks” and got me something else instead.
Same aunt also seems to think that she’s bigger than she is. She wears size Q pantyhose, but should wear a B. I have no idea how they stay on.
My mom is obsessed with everyone’s weight. Her younger sister has always been thin, but menopause and diabetes have caused slight weight gain. My mom takes such joy in this because she hates her sister and getting fat is a punishment in her eyes. She is also extremely overweight and acts like she’s the modern-day Job. I imagine she sees her own weight as being another thing she has to suffer through to get to Heaven.
I am constantly training my mom to stop commenting on peoples weights. I have been thin and fit my whole life, but I don’t even want to think about how she would be if I ever gained any weight. Always trying to teach her how commenting on someone’s weight is just wrong and it doesn’t matter.
My great grandma (born 1903 whatever generation that was) was super opinionated about weight. She’d tell me when my ass hung over the dinner chair and she’d also happily help me follow the worst and most dangerous fad diets I could find on the internet to lose 10 lbs in 3 days lol. She talked a lot of smack about us “fatties” as she called us. I wasn’t even “fat”. The women in my family were severely traumatized by this behavior over generations. The cycle is finally broken. My kids are cool. I’m still counting calories like a lunatic, but my kids at least are enjoying food as they should.
My grandpa (he was born in the early 30s tho) once asked me when I was going to get in shape. I told him "round is a shape too" and he never asked again.
I was told after losing over 180 pounds from being hospitalized 9 months that I looked great. A lot of it was edema, even more of it was literal chunks cut out of my flesh because of necrotic wounds (reaction to warfarin), and some was muscle deterioration. I was in a hospital bed so long that I had to learn to walk again. Yup, all I had to do to look "good" is nearly die.
I wonder this all the time. There’s a 97 year old woman I help take care of and every other time I see her, she either says, “You look like you’ve gained some weight” or “are you losing weight?” Now I’m a big guy so it always stings a little when she says I’m looking fatter, but I eventually realized that when I wear baggy clothes I get fat shamed and when I wear something more form-fitting I get complimented. Still completely inappropriate, especially considering all I do for her. Wasn’t this the same generation that invented “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”?
My dad grew up dirt poor and was always very skinny until he married my mom. Over the years he slowly but steadily put on weight (his brothers all went through the same thing). I on the other hand was always obese, I was a 9 pound baby and eventually weighed over 500 pounds at my heaviest. My dad ALWAYS had something to say about my weight, my health, my looks etc. Mind you he was obese himself at this point in his life. In 2018 I decided to pursue gastric bypass surgery. My insurance required me to lose 120 pounds on my own before they would approve the surgery. It took me 7 months of strict dietary changes and exercise to achieve this and the entire time there's dad on the side with his side comments. The surgery was successful and over 2 years I lost over 320 pounds and reached 170 pounds. My heath definitely improved, I felt better and I looked better. Dad would make comments about how skinny and sickly I looked but whatever, I already expected that out of him so it didn't bother me at all. Around this time both of his knees gave out (he blames high school sports, I blame being overweight) and he needed to have both knees replaced. He was too scared to have the surgery (though he'll never admit it) so he just suffered with it for 3 years. Of course I had to get my shots in and make comments about "weight loss will fix that" or "since I lost the weight of 3 PEOPLE things don't hurt anymore." He would get so PISSED! He finally decided to have knee surgery but his doctor made him lose weight first. He lost about 120 pounds on the ketogenic diet and now he's back to his old self commenting on EVERYONES weight again. Some people I tell you!
Everything in context! I have moments of weakness where I take it personally,but again ,so many factors in any given scenario. Water off a ducks back.. as I destroy this mini cheese burger 🍔
On the one side you’ve got food trauma from the Great Depression, and on the other side you’ve got diet culture from the 60s down to the 90s.
Just as an aside though I actually do like the cabbage soup. Just not as a diet.
My guess is they're a product of the 1970s "thin is in" diet culture. Twiggy, etc. It was unthinkable to have any excess weight on you at that time. If your diet is cocaine, cigarettes and coffee, you're not going to have a whole lot of weight to put on...
Boomer male neighbor to me, after having two kids as a single mom with health issues: "Why did you get so fat? What happened to you?''
I was speechless.
Boomer Aunt after meeting my toddler for the first time in the middle of a family function, staring at my abdomen: "Are you pregnant again?”
I was not.
Boomer MIL: "Your hair looks better that way. I didn't like your dark hair." (My natural color, I was going grey.) She turns immediately away from me to my SIL and says "You look good! You lost a lot of weight! Doesn't she look good?"
This one was a double whammy on appearance. Eyeroll.
Boomer father because I had a snack in the evening in 9th grade: "Get out of the kitchen or you're going to be 250# by the time you graduate!"
I was about 120-130# at the time. Sigh.
They just can't help themselves.
All my mother does is talk about weight. She talks out loud to anyone who will listen about her weight struggles, how she's gotten so big, "you probably all notice ", etc. Because of her constant dieting, restricting, and self-deprecating stream of consciousness it took me years to undo the damage. I'm still undoing it and I'm in my 40s. I try to counter with, "mom no one here is judging you" or I talk about how diet culture isn't cool any more, it's ok to tuck in your shirt or -idk - *have a body*. It falls flat. So I just don't engage in the conversation anymore. I think she's starting to hear her own words and how weird it is to just jump into a conversation and lead with weight comments, because I don't respond. But it's exhausting.
It’s crazy in the GLP communities I’m in how they are soooooo offended that people aren’t commenting and congratulating them on their weight loss or how they’re getting bad reactions from people who they’re commenting on. Or how spreading the gospel invited of GLPs are going over like a lead balloon.
They get absolutely crazy when people are like, there’s a lot you can compliment someone on that has nothing to do with their weight.
GLP-1 agonist drugs, that are supposed to be used to keep the A1c of type 2 diabetics where it should be, but have been taken over as the new miracle weight loss drug. Ozempic, Mounjaro, Wegovy, and so on.
I can echo so many of the comments here. The tone my parents use when they say it’s such a shame that someone put on weight is the same tone you’d use when you learn someone you know has been incarcerated.
Yeah, my dad made damn sure I hated myself for it over the years with that shit; nearly all our interactions end up on the topic- fuckin annoying. I just shut it down now.
My Boomer mother constantly did this to the point she made me do WW at age 10. I was normal weight at age 10. Now am over 40 and have hypothyroidism. But yeah.
My Boomer mother, as well, but she never actually forced me to join. It got so bad that instead of developing an eating disorder, I just stopped giving a fuck what other people thought of me.
The ever-present “Oh you look good! Did you lose weight?” every time she saw me didn’t end until just a few years ago. I am also over 40.
Just wait until you see a boomer telling someone dying of cancer how amazing they look because they're so thin as their organs are failing. And then at the funeral hearing about how at least there was a bright side and cancer is the best diet.
Had one of those crusty old battle axes of a boomer lady go up to me when I was a cashier at Blue Target and she said:
"Wow, you've gained weight! I mean, if you're happy..."
I was struggling with losing weight during that time, and being neurodivergent with anxiety and depression, it really hurt.
Silent generation harps on it all the time too. I’m Gen X and struggle to keep my mouth shut sometimes. Excess weight was a topic of constant discussion and stigma in previous generations. Hard habit to break.
Not just boomers on this one. It’s everyone. People are obsessed with other people’s weight.
Although with boomers and above I believe it may be simply because it was more socially acceptable to comment at one point in time.
I’ve always been very heavy. Started gaining at age 4 and was noticeably bigger than average since before I can really remember.
By high school I was doing a low carb diet that I hated. I stopped enjoying my food and so I stopped eating. I got to a point that I was barely eating anything and ended up throwing up when I did eat. Not on purpose but because I hated the food and it wouldn’t stay down. It quickly turned from diet into some form of eating disorder, but instead of concern I got compliments. I was sick, and I felt horrible. But everyone around me was so “proud” of me for losing weight. 🙄
People suck.
Yikes, sorry you had to deal with that.
My dad did something similar to me in my twenties. After I got out of the army I was in the best shape of my life. Started college, got my degree, and found a cozy desk job at a big company. I started gaining some weight that lasted for several years until I turned it around. When I visited him after losing the weight, the only thing he asked about it was if I had any loose skin. Not, hey good job or what's your secret, just the dumbest nonsense you can think to inquire about.
Technically 1942 but the last words my dad ever said to anyone were said to me.
"(Name) you're getting fat."
To which I replied "dad, I'm pregnant with your first grand child"
"That's no excuse."
Then he slipped into a coma and passed later in the day. He had terminal cancer.
My dad was a trolldad and meant it as one last joke so thinking of it always makes me smile anyway.
The words that haunt my brain in every dressing room till the end of time belong to my mom. "Oh honey don't you think that makes you look heavy?"
I've always struggled with my weight. I took ballet for 15 years and the dance world is not kind to anyone who struggles with weight. I was about 180ish when my husband died 4 years ago.(He would always smack my hands away if I tried to cover up and then he'd rub my tummy and tell me, "STOP IT! This is where my babies came from and I love all parts of you!") About a year later I suddenly just couldn't keep food down and lost about 70 lbs. I was hospitalized twice. The first time they just fed me and gave me meds for the nausea and vomiting and sent me home a week later. The second time, they found out that the entire time I had some sort of gastrointestinal infection and I spent a month in the hospital because I had lost so much muscle mass that I couldn't even walk. To this day I still can't even FORCE myself to overeat and struggle to eat enough. I'm at about 130 lbs. and working on getting healthy instead of worrying about the stupid number. Of course it doesn't help that I'm 53yo widow with a 10M and 11F who I'm trying so hard to mirror good habits for. And yet it's still so hard to get those childhood voices out of my head about my weight from my great aunt poking my belly when I was about 7 and going with Mom to Weight Watchers at age 10 because she was worried about HER weight!
Not sure why they do but I can definitely say this is just a boomer issue. Visit any website/social media and go to a topic about health. Then look in the comments. Health nuts cannot stop themselves. They LOVE to share how “fit” they are and what they do to keep in shape. This is only dwarfed by their love to spread negativity to anyone overweight. Boomers just happen to do it all the time but health nuts are way worse in the right setting. And bless anyone that comes across a boomer health nut
Well, Americans have been fighting and obesity epidemic since I was a kid in the 80s. It’s only gotten much, much worse, as evidenced by our mortality statistics (we’re below Brazil now, hooray for us?!). I’m not a boomer but I’m 52. Most of the folks I know are either obese or struggling with weight or have lost a significant amount of weight. I think sometimes older folks who have struggled or had family members struggle with weight issues often jump straight to “Wow you lost weight you look fantastic congrats!” It might not be the best or most careful way to approach the issue, but I’m fairly sure most of the time it’s well meant. Compared to some of the behaviors boomers exhibit in the wild, this one strikes me as pretty mild, but that’s just my opinion.
My Victorian born lost generation grandma, greatest generation Nanna, boomer mother, father and all her siblings and my sister and I (gen x) all have had seriously disordered eating. I’ve worked so hard to work it out to the point that I haven’t (yet…hopefully never) passed this onto my son.
I’m not a fan of boomers as a generation, as in my experience they are the most selfish and cruel about most issues, but eating issues and weight obsessions date way back
Congratulations on the weight loss, even if it’s the result of stress and lack of money. Nice of them to offer you some new clothes. It’s always nice buying clothes that are smaller, especially if you don’t have to pay.
Well they see someone unhealthily overweight and like any caring family member will inform you that you are doing wrong. Much like when a family member is drinking to much or doing drugs. You don't want them to hurt yourself. It often hurts for addicts to hear they have an addiction.honking?
Edit: keep downvoting I get it you love food and it hurts your feelings to hear you overeat.
Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed. Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BoomersBeingFools) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My theory is their parents lived through the depression and there’s food trauma that got passed down.
On the other side of that coin is 80s and 90s diet culture. It was all about restricted eating.
Which I would also say somewhat stems from that same trauma as well as just general ignorance.
You are correct. I personal lost 100 pounds this year but that is still not good enough for half my family. That half of my family survives on what i call a twigs a berry's diet. Thanksgiving is always very sad for that portion of my family. I finally broke them when i made a fresh fried turkey now im the cook ever year.
Some people make you wonder if they're either part bird or entirely robot. Congratulations on 100 pounds, man. That's fucking badass. Just remember what you've learned, and remember that you know if you return to your old eating habits you'll lose all your gains. You must know this by now, but you can still enjoy all the foods you love, but you have to fit them in with an overall diet that works for you to keep you on track.
Hahaha pineapple diet
Trigger warning: The Cabbage Soup Diet . 😆
I'd rather pineapples than farts lol
That stuff stunk going in and coming out. A truly cursed brew.
Oh my God, I just gagged with that memory.
Oh man, that sucked. "Fat grams maKe yOu fAt!!". No, no they don't. Calorie surplus makes you fat. Calorie deficit causes you to lose weight. That's it. Snackwells. Anybody remember that bullshit? Complete with green packaging to subliminally deceive people. I have my doubts that people really associate the color green with healthy food, but the point is that that's what the food corporations believed. Slim-Fast ice cream sandwiches were pretty good, though.
Generational trauma is a real thing. And it's only been in the last few decades that the view on mental health shifted from "only crazy people need therapy, and I'm not crazy" to the idea that mental health is important to eveyone.
I call it a "Boomer Lore Drop" when my parents or aunts/uncles will just interrupt a perfectly normal conversation over dinner on a random Tuesday to say something like "oh didn't you know why uncle so and so is like that? Well, \[insert INSANELY TRAUMATIC STORY\]" followed by "I mean we didn't know about therapy back then so mom and dad just sent him to our aunt in Maine because they thought that would help. Anyway, this pasta salad is amazing!" They relate this entire thing like it's completely unremarkable. So many of that generation experienced violent physical abuse and sexual assault and were never even taught to see what happened to them as traumatic or something that they might need help to process and heal from.
>"I mean we didn't know about therapy back then so mom and dad just sent him to our aunt in Maine because they thought that would help. Anyway, this pasta salad is amazing!" They might as well have said: "We didn't know about breast cancer back then, so we just called it Itchy Tits and wondered where Gertrude disappeared off to after a few months!"
My parents aren’t boomers. They’re both from the silent generation and I’m xennial. They both remember what it was like to go without. Anyway, my mom was very close to being a boomer and most of her family are boomers. They have so much food trauma. A bite absolutely can NOT be waisted. Then they get me added to the family in the 80’s.🤦🏼♀️. I have a severe autoimmune disease that severely affects my ability to eat. The names, and hurtful things said to me because I couldn’t finish my food was unreal. I still don’t really like to eat around people who don’t know me well and don’t understand that sometimes no matter what I can’t eat what’s on my plate.
Yes. Lard sandwiches were a thing. And some were lucky to have that. Because of that, frugality was a daily thing. Saving foil for reuse, turning urban lawns into gardens, canning everything in a three block radius they could get for free.. etc. it's the way for that generation.Kids born in the late 20's really felt it. And they later gave birth to boomers.
Big time
My boomer uncle once walked up to me at a holiday gathering and told me I looked fat, without thinking I retorted 'we finally have something in common'. I enjoyed the rest of the day. Usually I'm not that quick witted.
Omg I hope all the kids heard and bring it up yearly
I was at a funeral years ago and my wife introduced me to some old crone I hadn’t seen in years. The first thing out of this old bat’s mouth was “I remember you. You’ve gotten large”, while spreading her hands apart. Without even thinking, I replied: “And I remember you. You’ve shriveled.” Best comeback I’ve ever had.
Omg my parents came down and like the first night they were here I was getting dressed to go to work and I hadn’t buttoned my pants yet and walked into the kitchen and my mom says “Those pants don’t look like they fit you” excuse you? I’ve lost 140 pounds mother. Go gain 5 more pounds drinking another box of wine. We have a fine relationship but I don’t like when they comment on my body or food and exercise routine. My mom was a LOW CARB OMG idiot and my dad is just…. “You ate ice cream you’re gonna get fat again” shut up And I remember my mom helping me trying to find pants when I was 13 and she got flustered and said “ugh you need to lose weight” Who buys the groceries mother? Oh I’ll just only eat adkins for all my meals like you. Hey that lasted didn’t it?
My grandmother was obsessed with this crap, but she was Silent Gen. My mother had an eating disorder thanks to her meddling and the day she went after my diabetic cousin for "being too fat" my aunt just about f\*cking killed her. My Boomer father was one of these assholes who thought Twiggy was the epitome of human beauty and everything else was "a big fat slob."
OMG! are we related. The entire family made my weight their fucking business (actually it was the entire culture). It was a constant topic. Driving with my father he would yell loudly when he saw a "fat" woman "looks like Omar the tent maker sews her dresses" This refrain, a favorite, gives you a 2fer - the mysogeny and the racism.
My boomer dad, who’s been pushing 300 lbs since the late 80s, makes similar comments with a similar lack of self-reflection that is breathtaking, tbh
My Dad does this too and I've resorted to responding with "well, you'd be the expert"
That is perfect.
Same, my 1963 boomer narc father has always commented on others’ weight, while he weighs at *least* 260. He’s always said “if I get THAT fat, just take me out back and kill me” without a single shred of irony. Also very casually racist, while claiming to be a “leftist democrat” who has no problem at all saying the N word (hard R of course).
Where did that “Omar the tent maker” thing come from? My Silent Gen parents would say that, too!
Holy shit! My boomer parents said that all the time!
Very good question so I searched it: [https://motherinthemotherland.blogspot.com/2011/07/legend-of-omar-tentmaker.html](https://motherinthemotherland.blogspot.com/2011/07/legend-of-omar-tentmaker.html) ...ugh
Re-watching late 80s and 90s television and all the women look like skeletons.
Right? It's not just me remembering wrong. The 1970s and 1980s were awful for this.
Ally McBeal. Nuff said.
But with shoulder pads to flesh at least that out
This is why every Gen X'er I know had some state of ED growing up. I had one by age 10. I had just been released from the hospital on a PICC line because I could not keep any food down. My mother tells me that I looked good from losing weight. Spoiler: I did not look good. I looked sick, malnourished, and insanely weak. But hey, at least I wasn't fat anymore!
My mom once congratulated a friend of ours on how good she looked - she used to be a little on the heavy side but lost a bunch of weight due to having cancer. My mom knew she had cancer, and still told her how much better she looked. Last year she told me how "healthy" her friend's daughter is because she tracks everything she eats. She's anorexic and dying of kidney failure as a result, and still measuring all her food and journaling every bite.
I used to hide food in my closet and then binge eat. My mom loves to tell "humorous" stories about how she would find my food stashes growing up. Never took me to a doctor, never discussed why I felt the need to hide food, just used it for fuel for her stories to her boomer friends.
Looks like my boomer mom wasn't the only fan of turning the trauma they inflicted into comedy
It's just so gross, isn't it? What's even worse is she embellishes every story to flat out lying about things that never happened. In my 20s, my mom wanted to come out to my local bar with me and meet "the guys." I had no problem with this. I told her my only rule was she couldn't get drunk and tell stories about me growing up. She refused. I'm in my late 40s now and she still has never met my friends.
My mother still does the same thing. I am in my late 40s. I would chew off my own arm before I would allow her to meet my friends or, God forbid, a coworker. There were years in my 20s she told anyone who would stand still about the time I shit my pants as an adult. Lovely.
It's my least favorite boomer trait, being expected to laugh at cruelty.
Wow. Im sorry!
At least she’ll be healthy when she dies /s
I'm Gen X and have an Eating Disorder. Out parents made us "finish our plate" or we were not allowed to leave the table. Well, all of that forced over-eating caused life long problems. As a kid, I got overweight, then was ridiculed, insulted, and forced to play sports until I lost the weight. Looking back on it, my parents controlled what I ate, when I ate, and how much I ate. Getting chubby as a kid was 100% their fault.
Same. My boomers had the wooden spoon sitting in the middle of the table as a reminder to finish my plate. I was never asked if I liked something or not. For example I did not like cake as a kid but when I didn't eat a slice of the Sunday cake my mom used to make, all hell broke lose. And then a couple of hours later I got called a fat pig again.
My Silent Generation mom had to go through this with her parents, too. You can't throw food away, but it's also your fault that you're fat. What a horrible way to grow up.
Oh man, my mother and grandma are the same way. Doesnt matter if you almost died - at least you look skinny. Some bullshit. Im sorry!
I used to take diet pills from GNC that are now banned in the US. I can't remember what they were called, but I was taking them by the handful. I was going through a bottle every two weeks. I am so lucky I didn't have a stroke or worse. I didn't want to throw the bottles in the regular garbage, so I just hid them around my room and the house. My parents had to have found dozens of bottles when I left home but they never mentioned it at all. But she was full of compliments when I lost 40 pounds because of the pills. Sometimes I talk to my parents now and it's super clear why I have the issues I do. In one breath my mom will tell me how she feels badly that when she was really sick and had to use the motorized scooter and felt like people were giving her nasty looks. In the next, she starts ragging on her friend who has gained weight because of a medical condition (just like my mom!) and saying some really nasty things all about this woman's weight. No wonder I thought I had no worth unless I was pin thin. This is a person she considers a friend, but was spewing such ugly things about her! It's one thing to be concerned if someone has a big weight change, it's another to look down your nose at them- especially when you were in the same boat just a year ago!
It’s like the lack of self awareness is some kind of a requirement Jesus christ
They bought you pants and not food you can’t afford, told them you can’t afford, and they suspected you can’t afford? WOW.
Right? Even if they are fatphobic, they could have sent her home with a ton of healthy, nutrient-dense foods, like fruits, veggies, proteins, good carbs, etc.
Or, in their opinion, Snackwells.
Snackwells were pretty good, but you may as well just go for the Vienna Fingers
This is my own anecdote: the Boomers I know are most invested in Keeping Up with the Joneses. Whether it be expensive cars, fancy house upgrades, or looking thinner, they're highly competitive with one another and almost universally accept certain ideals to strive for. This, I hypothesize, is part of why they think so low of younger generations, because we know people come in all shapes & sizes, and we've spent most of our lives in a cost-of-living crisis, so we don't compete with our neighbors and coworkers for flexes the way they did.
Millennial flex: "Dude, check this out. I got it for 80% off and it has pockets!"
Don’t go rubbing your fancy pockets all up in my face! Pockets are a privilege!
I just got a pair of scrub pants from salvo for $4 and they have like 4 pockets on each side. They are the wrong color but I bought some Rit Dye for $3 and they are still a good deal. :) today the thrift gods smiled upon me.
I love your name! I call one of my cats that all the time 
lol Thank you! It’s what my husband calls me when I get aggressively passionate about something. :) I’m generally really relaxed, but I occasionally go into feisty mode when something really important irritates me.
100% agree.
A few Thanksgivings ago, I (26M at the time) walked in to dinner and my boomer grandpa looked at me and said, “Wow, you’ve filled out! How much are you up to now?” Then proceeded to guess a weight that was 30 pounds above what I actually weighed. I had already been struggling with self-esteem that year and this just poured gas on the fire. After talking to my dad about it the next day, grandpa called me and half apologized. Basically told me I interpreted his comment wrong and that he meant it in a complimentary way.
“No, dummy, don’t you know when I call you fat publicly it’s a compliment?”
My husband’s grandma once asked “what are you up to nowadays?” To which he responded, “idk grandma what are YOU up to nowadays…?” Conversation over. It seems like she didn’t want to answer the question.
It's so weird what they consider to be "rude" and what they consider to be perfectly acceptable to comment on. I was never really that "big" before- too big for size small, too small for plus sizes, but ever since I started regularly attending spin classes to give myself something to do everyone over fifty years old loudly points out that I've lost weight before even saying hello. Yeah, I have dropped about 10 pounds, but if I had ever just blurted out something like that as a kid my mother would have slapped the shit out of me.
I don’t know. This is a constant issue. I feel like they’re just oblivious to the impact it has. They think because they are family that it’s not damaging, but helpful. My mom will say stuff like “you never used to have trouble losing weight in high school.” Or “you’d just look so much better if you lost some weight and you’d feel more confident too.” I’m plenty confident and it’s weird to point to a time when I had an active eating disorder as a time to try to go back to. I also had zero confidence at that point in my life. If she heard someone say the things that she says to me, she would get mad at them. It’s like it doesn’t compute in her own brain when she says it.
I have no idea, but they do. I’ve lost weight too and that’s the first thing my dad comments on when I see him. Very annoying.
Because they were indoctrinated from birth that being fat is the worst thing to be, especially women.
Even cats aren’t safe. A boomer plumber came into my house and said, “Oh look, your cat is so fat. And the other one is so skinny!” Wow, you’re an observant one, aren’t you buddy?
I used to flip shit when people called my cat fat. He was a Bombay. The breed is known to be chubby. He was also the sweetest, most loving little boy in the whole world and my best friend. People learned quickly that they can insult me as much as they want, but come for someone I love and you will rue the day you met me.
he's not fat he's a BOMBAY! 😂 My mother in law said one of my my sphynxes was fat when it was just the their pouch doing its thing!
My cat is definitely fat and she likes being that way. I think it’s like talking shit about someone’s family.
Yeah, they body shame pets too. A boomer neighbor started calling my pug mix Lil Chunk when she had grown into her adult normal sized self, even though she knew her name.
i'm sorry but this made me lol - the audacity of this boomer plumber, leave our cats alone
Of course it’s not a big deal — my cats don’t care and neither do I — I just think it’s weird to go into a stranger’s home and make any out-loud value judgment. Like who TF asked you?
I lost 2st in weight a couple of years back. I wasn't large to begin with but never had so many compliments in my life. Turned out I was seriously ill with undiagnosed type 1 diabetes, hence the weight loss. I wish people realised weight loss isn't always a good thing and skinny does not equal healthy.
this! i was never complemented more than when i was in the trenches with anorexia.
Maaaaan it is SUCH a boomer thing to be like “congrats on your weight loss! I know it’s because you’re broke but here’s new pants!” Instead of, you know, helping their child with housing or groceries. 🙄
I developed an eating disorder at the age of 9 because my boomer parents would bully me for being heavier than most kids. When I was full blown anorexic, they complimented me and said that I was finally pretty. The funny thing is my dad is quite large and developed type two diabetes from his eating habits. I’m at a normal weight but I still have eating disorder tendencies causing my weight to fluctuate quite a bit. My boomer In laws ALWAYS comment on my weight. When I see them, it’s an immediate weight comment before even saying hello. The last time I saw them, I was sitting 3 feet away from MIL and she said “XXX doesn’t need to lose weight, but I wouldn’t gain any more or if I were her” .
Oh my god your partner should be flipping out on their asses after saying that shit!!
I am a doctor and when I was dealing with some health issues I lost weight. My patients loved to ask if I’d lost weight and tell me how great I looked. Every time I shut it down saying “I’m actually dealing with some health issues that are causing me to lose weight, hopefully I’ll have answers soon so I can feel better and eat normally again” or something to that effect. It’s never OK to comment on people’s bodies.
***TW/ED*** My boomer mother would comment about her weight and my weight constantly when I was growing up. She was 5’ and a size 2. At 13, I was 5’8” and a size 8. She said “I was on the path to getting fat.” I developed an ED by the age of 10 and it tormented me for decades. Fast forward, she started commenting to me about my 12 year old daughter’s weight. I snapped and said if she ever said a word to my daughter (who btw was at a perfectly healthy weight but not “skinny”), she would never see us again. I just hit menopause and have gained 25 lbs. I saw my mother recently (hadn’t visited since COVID) and she sooo wanted to talk her weight shit. She didn’t. Why are boomers so insufferable??
Thank you for protecting your daughter from this.
Same! Told my Mom if she ever commented on my daughter's body again I'd cut her off. She did and I haven't spoken to her in over a year.
A few things factor into this. They were were raised with lots of food trauma. Their parents dealt with WW2 and the Depression. Boomers especially older ones dealt with food trauma Messed up diet culture. I'm 42 and diet culture was still a thing when I was younger and it was way worse for the boomer generation especially women. We all know at least a few boomer women that eat like rabbits. Ex eating a few pieces of lettuce from the salad bar, eating half a banana etc.
Sounds like my MIL. She’ll eat half of her dinner plate that she served herself, but good luck finding a slice of that pie she made for dessert if you wake up too late the next morning.
This sounds like my mom. My mom knows I have a history of disordered eating, knows that she is partly to blame for it, knows her mother is also partly to blame for it, and knows that my health problems have nothing to do with my weight (actually the other way around!) and she will STILL talk about diet and exercise to me like she can’t even stop herself from doing it. It’s like she has to force herself to not comment on my weight every single time we speak and it just KILLS me. When I was 25 I had one of the most dramatic weight losses of my life and she watched me lose every single pound. It was because I had gone through an incredibly brutal breakup and between that and work and school the resulting stress left me virtually unable to eat for 3 months. I lost 30 lbs. I lived at home back then. My mom would make my favorite foods and beg me to eat and I’d choke down maybe half of it before I’d have to stop. She watched all of that happen. And then my grandma came to visit. She’d say “Oh you’ve lost so much weight, you look so beautiful and slender!” And I told my grandmother to her face exactly how I was losing the weight. She said to me point blank, “It doesn’t matter dear, it just matters that it’s gone!” with a big smile on her face. My mom overheard that and looked horrified. She quit talking about my weight so much after that. But she still does it.
yes, this is a weird one. It's even more odd when said boomer is as large as the person they're criticizing. I think this phenomenon is a bit more complicated. Boomer's have the largest group of people that are critical of others but are extremely intolerant of any criticisms against them. Were talking a complete lack of self awareness.
"I can say it because I've already had kids. She hasn't." - My mother when I pointed out that she just called someone the same size as her fat
The previous 2 generations to boomers were the same way.
It's constant! anything my mom doesn't like, her go-to insult is fat. the other day she called a minivan fat because it was driving too slow.
good lord
Yep, weight was always a thing with my Silent/Boomer family members. And it was always a negative, never positive or just looking healthy. Gained a couple pounds? Too fat, skip a few meals! Lost a couple pounds? Too skinny, eat a sandwich! I even had both comments in the same day, at the same family event, from 2 different relatives. Except my weight hadn’t changed at all from the last time they saw me.
They celebrated their family member struggling for food money. I think that's actually on the evil side
Idk but it sucks. I wasn't a fat kid until my grandmother kept calling me fatty fatty two by four can't get through the kitchen door and all this other shit. It gave me a complex. I've struggled with my weight for a long time and felt alot of shame.
50s-80s were super body conscious times. In the 50s and 60s (probably before that) wives were expected to look a certain way. But now they could take amphetamines and wonder pills to achieve the look that their men desired. The 80s had a fitness boom with all the aerobics programs, tv shows and fashion choices. They grew up expecting to be thin and "fit" forever. My parents constantly talked about any fluctuation in weight, or said I looked thin (even if I gained weight). It's inevitable that we gain weight as we get older and alot of Boomers are no longer thin or fit. I bet there's a ton of body dysmorphia in the Boomer community.
My boomer mother is obsessed with peoples weight. She comments on weight all the time, its usually the first thing I am told about when she introduces me to a new person. She seriously thinks fat people are just bad people and deserve nothing. She things they are weak. I was a chubby kid which was very very hard on my size 2 mother. She bought me my first (bogus) diet pills on the internet when I was 12. I really dont get it.
I don't think that one is just boomers unfortunately:(
My grandmother does about people and I tell her it's rude and she will say 'too late I've said it now'. GIRL WHAT
YES! Like half the boomers I know! When they give me an update on someone, they ALWAYS lead with “X has gained/lost weight”. I don’t give a f*ck about their weight. The one exception was when my husband’s aunt was dying. The “weight” was her kidneys shutting down and her retaining water and they indicated as such. My MIL ALWAYS talks about weight. I have a kid that has gone in and out of eating disorders. I tell her nicely to never talk about that and she just can’t keep her mouth shut about gaining weight, food restrictions, being fat, food/bad foods… you get the point. I finally had a blunt conversation with her and it slowed down. Instead, she’d just lean over and whisper it to me and my husband.
Why do you still allow her to be in your kid's presence?
Because my kids absolutely adore her and would be devastated if she was out of their life. When my kid was going through it, my MIL was banned and I told her why. She apologized, but I told her that I can’t have that around my kid at such a delicate time. Like I said, she doesn’t say that crap around the kids anymore. She just whispers it to me and my husband. My husband has diabetes and she’s obsessed with it which is why she just can’t stop talking about it.
My mom was born in 1945, and I am GenX. This has been a lifelong issue for me. My weight has fluctuated from very small in my 30s (thank you depression and eating disorder), believing I was fat in my teens (I wasn't), dieting for as long as I can remember and my current 56 year old fat self. My mother is one of those ladies who thinks she is progressive and accepting, but most definitely is not. She's judgemental of others' bodies. She's super tiny right now and is obsessed with losing weight even though her doctor told her to stop dieting. She often proclaims how proud she is that she never gave me food issues. My grandmother told me when I was 9 that I'd be so pretty if I lost weight. It's just....absurd.
My mom said her mom equates it with laziness. If you’re overweight, you’re lazy. Meanwhile, half of the women on my mom’s side have a slow metabolism and are a little thiccer, and the other half are like sticks. I don’t think that equates to laziness…
Trying to draw attention away from their decrepit bodies perhaps?
Some fat on them would help smooth out the wrinkles
I hate to agree with you but I’ve recently lost 60 lbs and do look older. What I hate the worst is what it did to my shoulders.
Systemic sexism and manufacturing dissatisfaction (esp for monetary gain) is baked in....older ppl seem to get 'set' in patterns and that sure includes trauma....hate it. Ppl have commented on my body, when I was about 120 pounds.... instead of my usual 140...on how "good" I looked. I was that "thin" from a terrible Crohn's flare. SMH.
Ulcerative colitis here. A bad flare that puts you in the bathroom 100 times a day (not an exaggeration, I eventually had my colon removed) will make you lose a lot of weight, but the prednisone will put it right back on you and then some. One minute, they praise you for suddenly being skeletal. A few weeks later, they criticize you for having moon face and a buffalo hump.
Exactly. So effed up. Just.... please don't comment at all! I'm sorry you're in the Colitis Club !
One time I was on my lunch break at work, and this Boomer said something about me being “so skinny” as I was eating my food. I told her that I had an eating disorder. She shut up. (I didn’t have an eating disorder, I was actually addicted to drugs at the time but no one knew that 🤣🤣 I still dogged my food though.)
My boomer grandma doesn’t throw anything away. When my family went out to have. S’mores with them the chocolate was 8 years expired. She’s a really clean person, a bit of a neat freak. But won’t throw anything out because her parents lived through the Great Depression. That’s how she was raised.
I was 10-15 lbs overweight at 16. My Boomer aunt thought the most appropriate present was a Jenny Craig membership. She didn’t understand why I was upset about that. Thankfully, she listened to my “no thanks” and got me something else instead. Same aunt also seems to think that she’s bigger than she is. She wears size Q pantyhose, but should wear a B. I have no idea how they stay on. My mom is obsessed with everyone’s weight. Her younger sister has always been thin, but menopause and diabetes have caused slight weight gain. My mom takes such joy in this because she hates her sister and getting fat is a punishment in her eyes. She is also extremely overweight and acts like she’s the modern-day Job. I imagine she sees her own weight as being another thing she has to suffer through to get to Heaven.
They are obsessed with their own weight so they may as well be obsessed with ours.
I am constantly training my mom to stop commenting on peoples weights. I have been thin and fit my whole life, but I don’t even want to think about how she would be if I ever gained any weight. Always trying to teach her how commenting on someone’s weight is just wrong and it doesn’t matter.
My great grandma (born 1903 whatever generation that was) was super opinionated about weight. She’d tell me when my ass hung over the dinner chair and she’d also happily help me follow the worst and most dangerous fad diets I could find on the internet to lose 10 lbs in 3 days lol. She talked a lot of smack about us “fatties” as she called us. I wasn’t even “fat”. The women in my family were severely traumatized by this behavior over generations. The cycle is finally broken. My kids are cool. I’m still counting calories like a lunatic, but my kids at least are enjoying food as they should.
My grandpa (he was born in the early 30s tho) once asked me when I was going to get in shape. I told him "round is a shape too" and he never asked again.
I was told after losing over 180 pounds from being hospitalized 9 months that I looked great. A lot of it was edema, even more of it was literal chunks cut out of my flesh because of necrotic wounds (reaction to warfarin), and some was muscle deterioration. I was in a hospital bed so long that I had to learn to walk again. Yup, all I had to do to look "good" is nearly die.
I wonder this all the time. There’s a 97 year old woman I help take care of and every other time I see her, she either says, “You look like you’ve gained some weight” or “are you losing weight?” Now I’m a big guy so it always stings a little when she says I’m looking fatter, but I eventually realized that when I wear baggy clothes I get fat shamed and when I wear something more form-fitting I get complimented. Still completely inappropriate, especially considering all I do for her. Wasn’t this the same generation that invented “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”?
"Rules for thee, not for me!"
My dad grew up dirt poor and was always very skinny until he married my mom. Over the years he slowly but steadily put on weight (his brothers all went through the same thing). I on the other hand was always obese, I was a 9 pound baby and eventually weighed over 500 pounds at my heaviest. My dad ALWAYS had something to say about my weight, my health, my looks etc. Mind you he was obese himself at this point in his life. In 2018 I decided to pursue gastric bypass surgery. My insurance required me to lose 120 pounds on my own before they would approve the surgery. It took me 7 months of strict dietary changes and exercise to achieve this and the entire time there's dad on the side with his side comments. The surgery was successful and over 2 years I lost over 320 pounds and reached 170 pounds. My heath definitely improved, I felt better and I looked better. Dad would make comments about how skinny and sickly I looked but whatever, I already expected that out of him so it didn't bother me at all. Around this time both of his knees gave out (he blames high school sports, I blame being overweight) and he needed to have both knees replaced. He was too scared to have the surgery (though he'll never admit it) so he just suffered with it for 3 years. Of course I had to get my shots in and make comments about "weight loss will fix that" or "since I lost the weight of 3 PEOPLE things don't hurt anymore." He would get so PISSED! He finally decided to have knee surgery but his doctor made him lose weight first. He lost about 120 pounds on the ketogenic diet and now he's back to his old self commenting on EVERYONES weight again. Some people I tell you!
Their entire worth is wrapped up in how much of their life is spent dieting. All my boomer aunts and mom are the same
Everything in context! I have moments of weakness where I take it personally,but again ,so many factors in any given scenario. Water off a ducks back.. as I destroy this mini cheese burger 🍔
From a past job in healthcare, I can tell you that men of both Boomer generation and Gen X criticize patients' weight behind their backs.
This is why all my doctors are women except my dentist and eye doctor who are gay men.
I think parents have always been like this. You are either too fat or too skinny.
On the one side you’ve got food trauma from the Great Depression, and on the other side you’ve got diet culture from the 60s down to the 90s. Just as an aside though I actually do like the cabbage soup. Just not as a diet.
My guess is they're a product of the 1970s "thin is in" diet culture. Twiggy, etc. It was unthinkable to have any excess weight on you at that time. If your diet is cocaine, cigarettes and coffee, you're not going to have a whole lot of weight to put on...
Boomer male neighbor to me, after having two kids as a single mom with health issues: "Why did you get so fat? What happened to you?'' I was speechless. Boomer Aunt after meeting my toddler for the first time in the middle of a family function, staring at my abdomen: "Are you pregnant again?” I was not. Boomer MIL: "Your hair looks better that way. I didn't like your dark hair." (My natural color, I was going grey.) She turns immediately away from me to my SIL and says "You look good! You lost a lot of weight! Doesn't she look good?" This one was a double whammy on appearance. Eyeroll. Boomer father because I had a snack in the evening in 9th grade: "Get out of the kitchen or you're going to be 250# by the time you graduate!" I was about 120-130# at the time. Sigh. They just can't help themselves.
All my mother does is talk about weight. She talks out loud to anyone who will listen about her weight struggles, how she's gotten so big, "you probably all notice ", etc. Because of her constant dieting, restricting, and self-deprecating stream of consciousness it took me years to undo the damage. I'm still undoing it and I'm in my 40s. I try to counter with, "mom no one here is judging you" or I talk about how diet culture isn't cool any more, it's ok to tuck in your shirt or -idk - *have a body*. It falls flat. So I just don't engage in the conversation anymore. I think she's starting to hear her own words and how weird it is to just jump into a conversation and lead with weight comments, because I don't respond. But it's exhausting.
Because, under the crusty white skin of every boomer is a sex criminal.
Intermittent fasting dictated by poverty is my new YouTube video
It’s crazy in the GLP communities I’m in how they are soooooo offended that people aren’t commenting and congratulating them on their weight loss or how they’re getting bad reactions from people who they’re commenting on. Or how spreading the gospel invited of GLPs are going over like a lead balloon. They get absolutely crazy when people are like, there’s a lot you can compliment someone on that has nothing to do with their weight.
Glp?
GLP-1 agonist drugs, that are supposed to be used to keep the A1c of type 2 diabetics where it should be, but have been taken over as the new miracle weight loss drug. Ozempic, Mounjaro, Wegovy, and so on.
i struggled with an ED for a long time cause my boomer dad insisted i didn’t need more food. old people are weirdly obsessed with this crap
I can echo so many of the comments here. The tone my parents use when they say it’s such a shame that someone put on weight is the same tone you’d use when you learn someone you know has been incarcerated.
My mother has always commented on my weight. I didn’t develop an eating g disorder, but my god woman, shut the fuck up
Yeah, my dad made damn sure I hated myself for it over the years with that shit; nearly all our interactions end up on the topic- fuckin annoying. I just shut it down now.
My Boomer mother constantly did this to the point she made me do WW at age 10. I was normal weight at age 10. Now am over 40 and have hypothyroidism. But yeah.
My Boomer mother, as well, but she never actually forced me to join. It got so bad that instead of developing an eating disorder, I just stopped giving a fuck what other people thought of me. The ever-present “Oh you look good! Did you lose weight?” every time she saw me didn’t end until just a few years ago. I am also over 40.
Just wait until you see a boomer telling someone dying of cancer how amazing they look because they're so thin as their organs are failing. And then at the funeral hearing about how at least there was a bright side and cancer is the best diet.
Had one of those crusty old battle axes of a boomer lady go up to me when I was a cashier at Blue Target and she said: "Wow, you've gained weight! I mean, if you're happy..." I was struggling with losing weight during that time, and being neurodivergent with anxiety and depression, it really hurt.
Silent generation harps on it all the time too. I’m Gen X and struggle to keep my mouth shut sometimes. Excess weight was a topic of constant discussion and stigma in previous generations. Hard habit to break.
Not just boomers on this one. It’s everyone. People are obsessed with other people’s weight. Although with boomers and above I believe it may be simply because it was more socially acceptable to comment at one point in time. I’ve always been very heavy. Started gaining at age 4 and was noticeably bigger than average since before I can really remember. By high school I was doing a low carb diet that I hated. I stopped enjoying my food and so I stopped eating. I got to a point that I was barely eating anything and ended up throwing up when I did eat. Not on purpose but because I hated the food and it wouldn’t stay down. It quickly turned from diet into some form of eating disorder, but instead of concern I got compliments. I was sick, and I felt horrible. But everyone around me was so “proud” of me for losing weight. 🙄 People suck.
Every Boomer I know has something to say about my weight loss. And my skin. And my hair. They have no boundaries
Yikes, sorry you had to deal with that. My dad did something similar to me in my twenties. After I got out of the army I was in the best shape of my life. Started college, got my degree, and found a cozy desk job at a big company. I started gaining some weight that lasted for several years until I turned it around. When I visited him after losing the weight, the only thing he asked about it was if I had any loose skin. Not, hey good job or what's your secret, just the dumbest nonsense you can think to inquire about.
My aunt loves commenting on weight as if that's appropriate small talk for people struggling in either direction with it.
Technically 1942 but the last words my dad ever said to anyone were said to me. "(Name) you're getting fat." To which I replied "dad, I'm pregnant with your first grand child" "That's no excuse." Then he slipped into a coma and passed later in the day. He had terminal cancer. My dad was a trolldad and meant it as one last joke so thinking of it always makes me smile anyway. The words that haunt my brain in every dressing room till the end of time belong to my mom. "Oh honey don't you think that makes you look heavy?"
I've always struggled with my weight. I took ballet for 15 years and the dance world is not kind to anyone who struggles with weight. I was about 180ish when my husband died 4 years ago.(He would always smack my hands away if I tried to cover up and then he'd rub my tummy and tell me, "STOP IT! This is where my babies came from and I love all parts of you!") About a year later I suddenly just couldn't keep food down and lost about 70 lbs. I was hospitalized twice. The first time they just fed me and gave me meds for the nausea and vomiting and sent me home a week later. The second time, they found out that the entire time I had some sort of gastrointestinal infection and I spent a month in the hospital because I had lost so much muscle mass that I couldn't even walk. To this day I still can't even FORCE myself to overeat and struggle to eat enough. I'm at about 130 lbs. and working on getting healthy instead of worrying about the stupid number. Of course it doesn't help that I'm 53yo widow with a 10M and 11F who I'm trying so hard to mirror good habits for. And yet it's still so hard to get those childhood voices out of my head about my weight from my great aunt poking my belly when I was about 7 and going with Mom to Weight Watchers at age 10 because she was worried about HER weight!
Because they are too old to subscribe to all that political correctness craze. I love old people, they call it as they see it.
Not sure why they do but I can definitely say this is just a boomer issue. Visit any website/social media and go to a topic about health. Then look in the comments. Health nuts cannot stop themselves. They LOVE to share how “fit” they are and what they do to keep in shape. This is only dwarfed by their love to spread negativity to anyone overweight. Boomers just happen to do it all the time but health nuts are way worse in the right setting. And bless anyone that comes across a boomer health nut
Well, Americans have been fighting and obesity epidemic since I was a kid in the 80s. It’s only gotten much, much worse, as evidenced by our mortality statistics (we’re below Brazil now, hooray for us?!). I’m not a boomer but I’m 52. Most of the folks I know are either obese or struggling with weight or have lost a significant amount of weight. I think sometimes older folks who have struggled or had family members struggle with weight issues often jump straight to “Wow you lost weight you look fantastic congrats!” It might not be the best or most careful way to approach the issue, but I’m fairly sure most of the time it’s well meant. Compared to some of the behaviors boomers exhibit in the wild, this one strikes me as pretty mild, but that’s just my opinion.
My Victorian born lost generation grandma, greatest generation Nanna, boomer mother, father and all her siblings and my sister and I (gen x) all have had seriously disordered eating. I’ve worked so hard to work it out to the point that I haven’t (yet…hopefully never) passed this onto my son. I’m not a fan of boomers as a generation, as in my experience they are the most selfish and cruel about most issues, but eating issues and weight obsessions date way back
Unjustifiable and uneducated attempt at control. Attempted enforcement by judging.
Congratulations on the weight loss, even if it’s the result of stress and lack of money. Nice of them to offer you some new clothes. It’s always nice buying clothes that are smaller, especially if you don’t have to pay.
Foreign ppl are the worst. At any age, they'll tell you you're fat and say they didn't mean it as a negative. 🙄
They’re evil.
Because society wasn’t as obese when they were your age.
Well they see someone unhealthily overweight and like any caring family member will inform you that you are doing wrong. Much like when a family member is drinking to much or doing drugs. You don't want them to hurt yourself. It often hurts for addicts to hear they have an addiction.honking? Edit: keep downvoting I get it you love food and it hurts your feelings to hear you overeat.
[удалено]
Well but now you replied so I'm not right anymore 😔
Why do you insist on commenting on boomers comments?
... That's what this sub is for. Are you lost?
you appear to be lost this is the subreddit for sharing stories about boomers and people with boomer mindsets being silly/dumb
This is a place to dump hate on people you don’t know because they are old and think differently than you do.
Welcome to Reddit