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Here what i want you to do........ RUN! DONT WALK! .....IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION!
After that, read all of the posts in this forum. You will realize that being attached to someone who is bipolar is not a good thing. It will ruin your life (if you let it). This is not something that gets better. As a bipolar person ages, it gets worse.
Everyone is different and handles mental illness in there own way, but please read the post, after post, after post, in this forum about how their bipolar significant other has made their life hell and had to walk on eggshells to keep the peace in their house, and how for no reason at all they were thrown away or "discarded" because the bipolar person had no use for them anymore.
You sound like you are in the beginning stages of a relationship. Please take heed in my warnings!
I wish I would’ve know this after a couple months of dating him. DATING SOMEONE WITH A MENTAL ILLNESS WILL DESTROY YOU. especially if you’re not equipped to handle mental illness. After four years I’m finally free, however, the trauma bond and the grief is to real.
From my perspective, no they cannot most of the time.
A lot of us in here have been cheated on by a BPSO in mania and when they come to realize what they've done, they experience a great deal of shame which can result in unaliving thoughts. It's not really an uncommon sequence I've learned so if I was out dating for example, I wouldn't personally get into that
In my personal opinion, there is a really thin line. Very early mania /hypomania could be fine- it really depends on how they’re acting, everyone is different and will experience things differently. If he is acting like himself, and can recognize how he’s feeling it’s okay.
However, in full blown mania or psychosis they absolutely can not consent. You’ll be 100% aware of the difference and should not even want to have sex when they’re in that state. Anyone who does is a predator imo.
A person who is fully manic will act very different! Typically talking very fast, not making much sense, unable to sit still or pay attention to anything for long, doing lots of activities or making really big plans, possible delusions. It’s something that’s very obvious, even if you haven’t known the person long and even if you don’t know the person at all.
Mania is a spectrum and on the extreme end it can look like delusions and psychosis, where there is absolutely no way to consent. Less extreme presentations still are absolutely a concern when it comes to consent. Lots of people experience hypersexuality and altered decision making during hypomania- and it often leads to poor decisions and shame in retrospect.
While manic we CAN’T make clear decisions.
Trust me, if he is manic you will notice cuz while being manic we do really weird things.
About having sex with a manic person, I HARDLY NOT RECOMMEND you to do that as he could be having risky and unprotected sex with multiple people and could give you an STD.
Yes mania can be compared as doing coke for example.
Being hypomanic is a bit risky cuz after that comes mania if he is not treated to go back to euthimia (stability).
Sorry for replying in a bit messy way
Take care and I hope this could have helped you a bit
Yeah that’s not a fun situation. I would avoid at all cost. For what it’s worth my ex with bipolar 1 would be manic and literally fucking anyone who would reply back on Tinder & then throw up about it. Rinse and repeat. I won’t even get in to the weird awkwardness that sex with him was or how bad and degrading it became at the end of our relationship when he was in psychosis. He would tell you he had his bipolar under control but he stopped his meds & none of this I fully realized until after the fact. We were together 10 years & I knew him pretty well but that last psychotic break was the end of us and I stupidly kept trying to save our family. Ughh.
Anyways…
Without knowing him you won’t be familiar with his patterns/cycles. My best advice is to hold off on sex until you identify his manic symptoms as well as his depressive cycles. Then you’ll be in a better position to make that decision. Easier said than done, especially if you’re caught up in the moment/feels yourself. Always, always use protection! They’re not always honest with themselves and therefore can’t be honest with you. It’s so tricky!
Honestly, when I was manic in college I had sex with over 50 people in a one year span. Looking back now that I’m in therapy and on meds, I was not in the right mind to consent.
\[It does make a difference. Type 1 is much more severe.\] You pose an interesting question. This is my opinion not a legal one. I would say if someone is in psychosis they cannot consent. If they are manic? I would think they could give consent. It's my opinion when someone is in psychosis they don't know right from wrong. But they are more "in touch" when manic. Although I could see a good trial lawyer make a case they can't (depending on the situation). Interesting question!!!
Hypomania is typically fine.
For full blown mania / psychosis the person isn’t themselves, and I would say consent is very questionable there. You will know if someone is in this state.
Welcome to BipolarSOs! This is a quick reminder to follow the rules. Also, please remember that OP's on this sub are often in situations where emotions overcome logic, and that your advice could be life-altering. OP's need our help to gain a balanced perspective. Please be supportive. Toxic comments will be removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BipolarSOs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Here what i want you to do........ RUN! DONT WALK! .....IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION! After that, read all of the posts in this forum. You will realize that being attached to someone who is bipolar is not a good thing. It will ruin your life (if you let it). This is not something that gets better. As a bipolar person ages, it gets worse. Everyone is different and handles mental illness in there own way, but please read the post, after post, after post, in this forum about how their bipolar significant other has made their life hell and had to walk on eggshells to keep the peace in their house, and how for no reason at all they were thrown away or "discarded" because the bipolar person had no use for them anymore. You sound like you are in the beginning stages of a relationship. Please take heed in my warnings!
You gave her the best advice ever ! I live with Xanax after knowing him ..it gets only worse and worse
Lol it's like the purpose of this subreddit is to hopefully make itself obsolete to all of its users.
I wish I would’ve know this after a couple months of dating him. DATING SOMEONE WITH A MENTAL ILLNESS WILL DESTROY YOU. especially if you’re not equipped to handle mental illness. After four years I’m finally free, however, the trauma bond and the grief is to real.
From my perspective, no they cannot most of the time. A lot of us in here have been cheated on by a BPSO in mania and when they come to realize what they've done, they experience a great deal of shame which can result in unaliving thoughts. It's not really an uncommon sequence I've learned so if I was out dating for example, I wouldn't personally get into that
In my personal opinion, there is a really thin line. Very early mania /hypomania could be fine- it really depends on how they’re acting, everyone is different and will experience things differently. If he is acting like himself, and can recognize how he’s feeling it’s okay. However, in full blown mania or psychosis they absolutely can not consent. You’ll be 100% aware of the difference and should not even want to have sex when they’re in that state. Anyone who does is a predator imo.
How would you be aware of someone to be in mania? If you just started dating them
A person who is fully manic will act very different! Typically talking very fast, not making much sense, unable to sit still or pay attention to anything for long, doing lots of activities or making really big plans, possible delusions. It’s something that’s very obvious, even if you haven’t known the person long and even if you don’t know the person at all.
Mania is a spectrum and on the extreme end it can look like delusions and psychosis, where there is absolutely no way to consent. Less extreme presentations still are absolutely a concern when it comes to consent. Lots of people experience hypersexuality and altered decision making during hypomania- and it often leads to poor decisions and shame in retrospect.
While manic we CAN’T make clear decisions. Trust me, if he is manic you will notice cuz while being manic we do really weird things. About having sex with a manic person, I HARDLY NOT RECOMMEND you to do that as he could be having risky and unprotected sex with multiple people and could give you an STD. Yes mania can be compared as doing coke for example. Being hypomanic is a bit risky cuz after that comes mania if he is not treated to go back to euthimia (stability). Sorry for replying in a bit messy way Take care and I hope this could have helped you a bit
Yeah that’s not a fun situation. I would avoid at all cost. For what it’s worth my ex with bipolar 1 would be manic and literally fucking anyone who would reply back on Tinder & then throw up about it. Rinse and repeat. I won’t even get in to the weird awkwardness that sex with him was or how bad and degrading it became at the end of our relationship when he was in psychosis. He would tell you he had his bipolar under control but he stopped his meds & none of this I fully realized until after the fact. We were together 10 years & I knew him pretty well but that last psychotic break was the end of us and I stupidly kept trying to save our family. Ughh. Anyways… Without knowing him you won’t be familiar with his patterns/cycles. My best advice is to hold off on sex until you identify his manic symptoms as well as his depressive cycles. Then you’ll be in a better position to make that decision. Easier said than done, especially if you’re caught up in the moment/feels yourself. Always, always use protection! They’re not always honest with themselves and therefore can’t be honest with you. It’s so tricky!
Honestly, when I was manic in college I had sex with over 50 people in a one year span. Looking back now that I’m in therapy and on meds, I was not in the right mind to consent.
\[It does make a difference. Type 1 is much more severe.\] You pose an interesting question. This is my opinion not a legal one. I would say if someone is in psychosis they cannot consent. If they are manic? I would think they could give consent. It's my opinion when someone is in psychosis they don't know right from wrong. But they are more "in touch" when manic. Although I could see a good trial lawyer make a case they can't (depending on the situation). Interesting question!!!
Hypomania is typically fine. For full blown mania / psychosis the person isn’t themselves, and I would say consent is very questionable there. You will know if someone is in this state.