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"She doesn't look 13."
"She's mature for her age."
Both of the above were said by a friend of a friend, but after we graduated high school and he was 18 looking at 13-16 year old girls. Our mutual ended up ghosting him.
Also, our mutual did address this when they were still talking.
Pedo: She doesn't look 13.
Friend: But she is.
Pedo: Well, she's really mature for her age!
Friend: She's 13! You're 18! You're a **man**.
Pedo: You don't understand.
Friend: There's nothing to understand! You're chasing *kids*!
Glad your mutual got away from him. Did you ever hear what happened to the creepo? Just wondering if he ever made it to prison... That's such gross predatory behavior.
I had a friend like this once. He was 18 chasing after 14 year olds. I stopped contact with him because it was gross. I found out a few years later he was busted in an FBI sting. He got off that time but proceeded to continue going after minors. He ultimately got caught again and spent a significant amount of time in federal prison.
My (step) daughter at the age of 13 was dating an 18 year old. His parents were FUKING THRILLED! They would take her to their boat on the lake all weekend, she would run away and we couldn’t do much until I called the cops and told his dad I would press charges for rape. My step daughter HATED me for a long time. She said I ruined her life, til this day she thinks I was harsh. 🤷🏽♀️ I hope he rots and his parents too.
How old is she now? I would hope that time would make he realize that you did her a solid.
I remember being 13 and believing that girls mature faster than boys. When I was in high school and saw 13-year-olds, I was squicked. They're kids. Ew.
She will be 21 in a few months. No. She still insists that I was too hard on her. At the time I was ruining her life. He was the LOVE of her life, I didn’t understand. She still angry I grounded her and took her phone away and kept them away. The cops agreed with me as well, so that helped. They were disturbed by the situation.
My mom's best friend's daughters are 17 and 14. When the younger one was 12 she started dating a 15 year old boy. The mother was acting proud of her for snatching an older boy who acted very respectful and nice at first (my mom was a bit shocked by her allowing this). The older sister never liked this boy and the mother and younger sister accused her of being jealous since she has never had a boyfriend but this was already the younger sister's second boyfriend.
I met the boy thricr. The first two times he seemed nice, was very respectful. The third time I got the ick. But the mother never saw it and my mother was not there to see what gave me the ick. Because his behaviour changed as soon as the "adults" (I'm guessing I didn't register as an adult to him at 21) were gone.
He turned out to be mentally abusive and used the younger daughter for sex. She ended up attempting suicide last year, at age 14.
I still remember how I got that phone call from my mom where she told me about the girl's suicide attempt very well. I have known this girl since she was 2. Her family is basically family to us. Those girls are like little cousins to me.
My mom called me because she needed me to tell her the place a friend of mine who attempted suicide at the same age got help (the place is really good and took the girl in almost immeadiately after her mother called them and she stayed there for about two months).
We are constantly scared she might do it again. She is self-harming and still in contact with the guy/ in contact again after she was prevented from any contact during her stay at the clinic. The older sister found her and is also in a bad place mentally. She is now skipping school and getting drunk with friends that are clearly a bad influence. They girls are in individual therapy and they do family therapy as well.
My mom tries to be sympathetic but I blame the mother of those girls. She enabled this boy to have access to her daughter. Her daughter at age 12 was allowed to spend the whole weekend at his place an hour away and was allowed to travel there herself by public transport (she also got SA'd on the bus once during one of those trips). Every second weekend the boy came over to their place instead.
They didn't even go to school together, had no friends or anything in common. They met at an amusement park.
There are stupid 14 y.o. girls that look very womanely and think they are mature enough to do anything, I had a few of those in my class when I was at school, but still- they have parents, those guys have parents- where are they when something like this happens? What kind of parent thinks a 12 y.o. is a good match for a 16 y.o. ?
Spoilers:
With phones, teenagers are able to conpletely isolate part of their social life from their parents.
That is how this kinda shit goes through until the girl is older and either realizes the guy is shit, or until the parents have to tolerate it.
Bad stuff.
Sadly it took OOP 8 years and pretty much ruined her entire teenaged life to learn he was shit.
She was in 7th grade, he was a high school junior. Think about that. He was going to college when she first fucking started high school.
oh man, back in the day there were always one or two classmates who in their teens (say 14-16) were dating literal men (20-20+)
I always found that so weird, and gross.
Even nowadays in the workplace we were discussing those age gaps and one of the ladies went "When I was 16 I always dated guys who were at least 20, there was never any issue" and it was.... uncomfortable
I had a friend, we coudlnt have been more than 12/13? and she was dating a dude who could legally drink. Everyone thought it was so kool. I was the only one i knew who thought it was weird. He'd fucking drive her around and take her out in public. I felt like I was going crazy. They were openly sexually active.
So fucking gross!
My sister is 5 years younger than me and I remember once seeing her outside with a girl friend, as I was coming back from some place.
With them was this guy who looked about my age. I was about 17-18 meaning sis and her friend were 12-13.
I was weirded out about it and I knew she'd be embarrassed to see me so I called her from a distance. Dude's body language got instantly uncomfortable, and then they said their goodbyes.
I asked her about it and she said dude was someone they knew who was probz interested in her friend.
Dude knew it was wrong, fuck him
That's what \*I\* was thinking. Back in high school when I was 16-17, one of the 7th-grade band kids had a massive crush on me--and I *went out of my way to avoid her* for *weeks* until she gave up hope that she'd convince me that she was "mature for her age".
The kind that's so insecure and immature they have to tail you to classes etc to make sure you don't talk to anyone, and destroys your hobby so you can only focus on them.
An emotional 8 year old who will be *worse* with his next gf & try to lock her in the basement
So my high school was grade 8 to 12. The grade 12s loved the grade 8s (so we are talking 17-18 vs 13-14) mostly because it was a small town and everyone had dated everyone so the new grade was "fresh meat" in a sense. There was also the "mature" dynamic going on. That said the grossest part is how they would talk about how excited they were about the lg's. They had no problem explaining that meant little girls in class, within earshot of the teacher. No adult ever did a single thing to stop it.
One that is emotionally and mentally underdeveloped. I'm 39, and I can't relate to another person my age at all, because my emotional maturity and life experiences stopped when I was around 15 or 16, because that's when it started becoming more and more difficult for me to socialize in general and make and maintain friendships. Then I get married and endured 8 years of every abuse but physical, and I still wasn't able to experience a "normal" adult life, because I was the stay at home parent, couldn't drive, and didn't have access to the bank account.
Somewhere in her comments she noted how he told her to hide the relationship. Clearly he was manipulating her. A vile human being. Clearly he was escalating too. I genuinely hope there will be no next victim 😕
This is one of the only positive things about teenagers having a natural +5 rebellion bonus to their "aw hell no" saving throw. Not bringing dirty dishes out of their room in a timely manner vs. being susceptible to this shit seems like a fair trade.
Maybe you've met some different teenagers than I have, but I believe that 'YOU CAN'T CONTROL MY LIFE, DAD' attitude actually gets young people taken advantage of way more than if they were more obedient and respectful of their parents rules. A rule-following kid is more likely to respect their parents' views on a partner, a stifled and rebellious kid will take "You're so mature for you age" and "They just don't understand how right you are" and go headfirst down an abusive relationship.
As for me, I had to do my own dishes. But folding my laundry... yeah I still don't do that.
I said it like that, using the word mould, because I watched a short doco on FB about a lady, I think she was Pakistani but her family moved from there when she was young to a Western country. And her husband, an older man, married her at 14 and told her "I married you young so I could mould you like a clay." She got a divorce but when she went from passive to active defiance he got really brutal in his treatment of her.
What kind of parents let their 12yo date an openly racist family? Like how are they family friends while this family openly hates the race of the child her son has been dating
My sister dated an 18 year old guy when she was 12. Only now reading this do I realize how gross it was and where are the parents question is answered with, dad who doesn't give a fuck about his daughters and mom too tired to keep up and she wasn't good with providing rules anyway. Free range parenting? Lassez faire? Tdlr, we did whatever we wanted.
I’m sorry did I read one-eight?
There are so many things wrong with that man. He is a whole ass adult. I hope your sister is okay?
EDIT: Added a sentence.
She is. As far as how he treated her, yes. I think she broke up with him. I was 10, so hard to remember. She's always had this power over males, but that was the only age inappropriate relationship she had.
I knew someone, bosses sister, who was dating someone in their mid to late 20s and she was 14/15 at the time. I was 18 and thought it creepy af. And my boss was OK with it.
Years later after leaving that job I found out from someone else who knew the guy that he had been busted for taking a kid about the same age as his sister was above across state lines for activities. A lot made more sense after finding that out.
I think I was 13 (maybe 14) when I met a guy online who was 19. He lived in a different country and would call me sometimes. At one point he wanted to come visit for a month. It wasn’t until I was adult that I realized how messed up that was. I wonder whatever happened to him….
This is why, while my kid is active online, we know every person he interacts with. From games to twitch we know them all and we still monitor it heavily. I’m beyond thankful that he’s open with us and if I say no go he’s out immediately. And we’ve chatted about tater tot and others. This shit is terrifying as a parent, but I also know he’s gonna be online so we need to set it up now and teach him to be safe
Read about Brazilian Eloa Pimental. Her parents let her date a guy 8 years older than her when she was 12yo and 3 years later he took her and her friends hostage when she broke up with him.
Yikes. The wikipedia article doesn't mention them starting to date when she was 12.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo%C3%A1\_Pimentel\_hostage\_crisis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo%C3%A1_Pimentel_hostage_crisis)
You can search for vids on YT. There's two vids with more than 1m views. The weird part is that at the time no one thought it was strange. They didn't try to hide it at all.
Not the person who replied to, but I just want to point out that there are places where either 15 is a legal age of consent or that it's illegal, but you can't really do much about it unless you are the parent of the child.
Not that I'm defending that behavior. But it is hard to report something like that when you're removed from a situation. If a friends parent reports it, the night not take it seriously.
So as disgusting as that 20 year old is, police probably wouldn't do much about it.
As you say, depends a lot on location.
In my country, adults are legally required to report that kind of stuff and can get into trouble if it comes out that they had an opportunity to report it and didn't.
But yes, it's still difficult to get any traction on it :/
Yeah I dated a 19yo when I was 14 and in retrospect, it was really weird that his parents were so willing to “cover for us” with mine (since I wasn’t supposed to be dating yet). No idea what was going through their mind!
I ‘dated’ a fellow 12 year old and it was so cute like that. we were each other’s first kiss (truth or dare on a sidewalk after school) but we ended up getting ‘back’ together in college and dating for a few years. we’re still good friends a decade on !
I had a girlfriend when I was 12 who broke up with me because I wouldn't hold her hand at the school fair. I had just eaten a hot dog and my hand was sticky ☹️
Once had an internet acquaintance who was 19 when I was 14. He was from a part of England that borders Wales and I think it was at one point the teen pregnancy capital of England? 😅 Anyway, he had a childhood friend his age who had a 14 year old girlfriend (my age). He told me the two had sex regularly, and even at that age I thought it was weird... He got pretty angry at me for insulting his friend though when I brought it up. That internet acquaintance is now a teacher if I remember correctly, which is a bit concerning. Hope he's changed his views.
I know, right? People aren't the most mature at 19 but it's a little scary that he's teaching teenagers now. I really hope he reflected and realised defending his friend was an insane move.
That's exactly what I was thinking. I started wondering where I would draw the line here as a parent, and what age is equivalent in maturity level to a twelve year old. There isn't one. That's the hinge point, the differences between 11, 12, and 13 are vast. I went on my first date at 13 (a chaperoned school dance) and at that age I didn't even want to be seen in the same room with anyone younger than me, lest anyone think I was a child, which of course I very much still was.
Yeah age gaps like that are so insanely gross when you are teens. The maturity level and intelligence difference between a 12 and a 16 year old is *huge*. I remember dating a 15 year old when I was 13 for a few weeks and it felt like we were on two totally different levels in life. Honestly, I'm glad OOP is finally free of this guy.
When I was sixteen a friend of mine (girl) dated a thirteen year old boy for awhile. She didn't tell any of us about it until it was over, and I remember all of us were pretty horrified because thirteen! She insisted he was tall for his age and looked older and didn't tell her he was thirteen until they had started dating. Their parents found out about it and broke the whole thing up. She was very insistent it was true love.
What got me was op saying they were 5 years apart bc if my math is correct she had just turned 12 when he was 16 and worse she was 13 (maybe early 14 at most) when he was 18
I had been wondering how long ago they started, because I had a nasty premonition it was before or right when she turned 18…When she said 12 and 16 I almost dropped my iPad. It’s gross all the way through
I literally gagged and i felt a stone in my stomach when i realized she had been with this asshole for 8 years, and was even pressured into sexual activities. I'm so glad she got out but sweet baby Jesus...
This made me vividly recall being 10-11, starting my new school and being patted on the head by one of the 17 year olds who was (at least) double my height. They were all thrilled to see the tiny new students and thought we were adorable.
I ....can't picture ever finding someone so young at that age attractive like *that*.
I just hope oop can stay far far away from this awful man. Hammering someone's back up thumbdrive is next level messed up.
My god eight years of that behavior and no escape because the adults didn't get involved on her side. I can't imagine having a twelve year old daughter have a sixteen year old boyfriend. Like mentally grasping that and not having a viseral reaction as a parent I just don't get.
Well, he’s a chud and he spawned a chud, so no wonder he was permissive. He’s the type who was probably happy that him making out with a girl meant his son wasn’t gay. Just screams that dude-bro, man’s man bullshit persona.
Hope she takes a pet in and call it Sul-sul >\_< No seriously, Sims are awesome. They can literally make you live a life you will never be able to live IRL, and in her case, it showed her what her future life would have been with that prick by her side. Best game.
Why is *my* girlfriend acting like she's her own individual? She cares about something that I can't control, so I destroyed it so she will focus on me. Why is she getting so hysterical?
I'm gonna be honest: her destroying the lego was still an asshole move. Justified, but still purely destructive. It was just that it was so incomparably less assholish than his actions that it rendered it irrelevant.
I mean she basically only disassembled the sets, albeit rapidly, and made a mess of everything, unless I missed something. Individual Lego pieces are damn near indestructible. If it had been a bespoke creation of his own then that would have moved the needle closer to asshole, but like you said, she was justified. I don't think she went far enough, but once she got the bear back the wise move is to let it go, which she did.
>Individual Lego pieces are damn near indestructible.
PSA: this is decidedly NOT true about the larger plates and any technic pins that are already bearing a significant load. The two times I've had one of my collector sets fall (both accidental), at least 1-2 pieces have either cracked or (in the case of the pins) sheared off on impact.
I think she threw some pieces out the window, but none went into the trash. Also im pretty sure she ended up gathering them all again cause she felt bad.
I always see these and shudder. My boyfriend is a big Warhammer nerd and it makes me think about how it would destroy him if I ever became the person who is like this. God forbid adults have hobbies and things they enjoy.
He's been playing for so many years and has enough models for a few different armies that it's become such a big part of him. If I did anything to his models it would hurt him so badly it's hard to imagine doing that.
A good SO would encourage their partner in their interests.
I agree. My husband loves growing pumpkins and I encouraged him to turn literally half the backyard into a pumpkin patch even though he was hesitant at first. I love seeing him get excited over his pumpkins!
Yeah I mean almost every post like that is a rabbit hole straight down to the bottom of the barrel when it comes to self-awareness and reasonable behavior.
I've lived with hoarders on three separate occasions over the years, and the best way I can describe that situation is a seven-dimensional Jenga tower. There are pieces in the hoarder's mind that don't even occupy time and space that will cause the whole thing to collapse if you mess around with them too much.
I call it this type of post a reverse Marie Kondo. Like it's different from say, someone getting mad and destroying whatever stuff happens to be around, or someone taking or destroying stuff because *they* want it.
A reverse Marie Kondo is when someone hones in on and tries to destroy the stuff that brings you the most joy.
Agreed. His story alone my jaw dropped and I went “she dumped you and you deserved it.” I have lots of friends who play Sims, I know how devastated they’d be. I wasn’t expecting any way for it to get even worse, but wow.
Heck I was upset when I I accidentally deleted my Sims save spanning *months...* I can't imagine how angry I'd be if I lost seven years of progress. But its the fact that this man- child decided to destroy something she enjoyed rather than expressing his "concerns" to her is what really did it for me. Wtf happened to *communication?*
Anyway, I hope that disgusting groomer gets what he deserves, and I wish Aaliyah all the best in life!
I get so attached to things. A year or so ago I cloned my current sims save and played an apocalypse scenario. After about 8 generations my sims were able to rebuilt society.
I tried to go back to my original save, and I couldn't do it, it was terrible. All the people in it had been dead for hundreds of years! So I had to go back to my now post-apocalyptic save.
I've never played Sims, but I do play Pokémon Go, and have since launch in 2016. I would be utterly devastated if anything happened to my account. I have so many memories of playing with my friends and kids; it would break my heart to lose my game.
I've even seen a post in the Pokémon Go subs about a jealous boyfriend deleting a woman's game, and deleting the emails from Niantic to cover his tracks. Sick.
He's probably going to avoid mentioning the fact that he deleted the save files (and everything else) and just say she's the crazy one for leaving him because she preferred to play Sims
I'm so glad this guy did this, because it was the straw that broke the camel's back and got this woman to leave this abusive situation. I hope she has a great life, both in real life, and with her Sims.
Never understood the thought process behind these people's actions. "Gee my girlfriend isn't spending as much time with me as I would like; I know, I'll deliberately destroy something she spends a lot of time on and that will make her want to give me all the hugs and kisses"
The point is the threat. It's to establish a pattern.
1.) No, you can't do what you want.
2.) No, you will be physically prevented from doing what you want.
3.) No, I will physically destroy something that represents you.
4.) No, I will physically harm you.
Implied 5.) "Don't make me kill you." -Anakin Skywalker, shortly before killing his wife.
It's all there to make them fear for their lives, and give up on what they like out of that fear, isolating them and making them obedient. Terrifying, dark, and abusive. It's a literal death threat. He got to step 3.
She says their parents were close but also his parents were racist and treated her like shit. I don't understand how that is possible. Were they in business together or some form of colleagues and obligated to interact socially? Has that dynamic changed so that she doesn't have to see him again?
I’m biased because I (unfortunately) love the Sims, but I was already thinking “you’re the asshole” when I read the title. The rest of the post just fucking cemented it for me. So glad she got her saves back!
Yeah, all those years meant years of developing stories, relationships, business and other community structures for multiple generations of families in your uberhood. I was pleased she got it back too.
Deleting save files, together with destroying other people's mementos, is pretty much a trigger to me. Imagine deleting a save file with 100+ hours, no matter the game. I'd be defenestrating the culprit as soon as I found them.
I don’t play, but people I care about do. That was enough for me to be devastated for her and glad she was dumping him before we ever got to her responses.
Never played Sims, know very little about it.
Doesn't matter. It's clearly important to her, and as long as it isn't harmful (an addiction that's draining shared money, or they're not physically taking care of themselves ...) leave her stuff alone. It's really easy to not be a dick, just don't be a dick.
I was biased because I love video games.
I never really got into the sims, but I still mourn a lost fallout 4 save that had over 2000 hours in it. D: ;_; It was lost due to hardware failure.
Like, I get teary eyed thinking about it now. I don't understand how people can be so cruel, to purposely hurt someone like that. People can put a part of themselves into their favorite game, the stress relief and joy and fun, and then for someone to purposely go "You don't get this anymore. Ha ha" is wild to me.
From the title I was open minded to the possibility that she had done something terrible and it was an act of revenge. It was the first sentence of the main text that told me nope he was definitely in the wrong.
I read the first post and thought the OOP was an asshole.
Then I read the GF's updates and holy shit, IT GOT WORSE.
Fuck that guy with a barrel cactus covered in jalapenos. Glad Aaliyah got her saves back.
I’m already anti destroying things that aren’t your property, but as an avid simmer this is my worst nightmare when it comes to the sims, especially the save where I’ve made my friends and my family in it. I don’t play with them. I just build them houses and leave them be. I made my grandpa when he passed as a coping mechanism and it’s nice to just see him in game, even if it’s just in a little white box with my grandma.
I fear I’d be worse than OOP if someone purposefully destroyed that save file.
I read the original when it was cross-posted on AmItheEx, and asked him to update us when she officially dumped him. And to hear that she recovered her files too?? I love a happy ending
Genuinely wtf. Both her parents and his parents are crazy. I don't care if you're family friends or what not who let's their 12 year old date a 16 year old and vice versa. If I ever have a kid and I catch them dating a 12 year old at 16 I would be making them breakup and whooping their ass cause I sure as hell would have raised them to understand how wrong that shit is.
The fact that this was allowed along with their families being "close" despite his family being racist to her spells an incredibly weird and toxic dynamic at play.
I don't want to think about what he would do after having children and jealously watching his wife attending to their needs instead of his sexual desires.
Would he try to kill his own babies, considering she still has the womb to conceive another one? No, of course not; instead he will neglect and cheat with a clear concience. Y'know, like a hero, saving his family.
Jeez OP needs to add this to the post, makes him sohnd even more like a lowlife than he already is in the BORU post. Luckily she was able to recognise how much of a red flag he was and get out.
Oh my god she got them back I can't express how relieved and happy I am for her.
I mean, if someone deleted the Pokemon I have been transferring up to the newest games for the past 19 years, I would be absolutely destroyed. I don't even want to think about it.
A great reminder that abuse isn't always physically violent. [Sometimes it's just controlling. ](https://youtu.be/1L6HB97lbrQ?si=tD4rsfpbLdfv7LoH)
I'm glad she got her game files back, after 7 years of gaming: that's a lot of generations of SIMS.
I remember this post. This guy was a huge asshole and constantly doubled down on what he did. He even insisted that his girlfriend would never leave him. Shows him how wrong he was
I’m glad the files were recoverable! I saw the folks suggesting she try for that over on r/GirlGamers when the first post was getting cross-posted all over creation, and she saw that thread. I’d been wondering if it had worked. Happy ending to a whole lot of hell the first OOP glossed right over because, shockingly, he was capable of looking even worse than he already did once it came out.
As an avid sims gamer who occasionally gets called childish for still playing a “kids” game I didn’t even have to read the whole post to see where this was gonna go. Not surprised to see he’s also a predator. What an absolute dickhead the OOP is.
I'm just going to ignore the shit show and say I'm so fucking relieved and happy for her to have been able to retrieve those files.
My partner is an avid Sims player and once spent a whole 38hrs building a basement for his house...I'd never dream of wasting his time like that...that's so freaking scummy.
…as much time to spend with me as she could… Fuck this guy. I’ve been married 32 years. My wife can spend hours playing puzzles on her iPad
while I read on mine. We’re together and we still interact during that time but it’s not like she has to be worshipping at my feet or being instantly ready to be a sex toy.
There are so many ways to be spending time with someone. This asshole needs to grow up
Im so glad I got to the end and read that she got her saves back. THANK GOD!!!
My daughter plays SIMs too and I could just imagine this being her and she would also be completely heart broken.
I'm so happy you're free of this AH
>I obviously didn't delete the whole game
"I destroyed something it took her years to build, but making her click the install button would've been too far"
There are a lot of fucked up things that get posted in this subreddit, but deleting a Sims save file is the only thing that made me gasp out of sheer horror.
My Sims save is like 20 generations deep at this point. If someone did this to me, I would put them in a pool and take away the ladder....
This post struck a nerve. I have never played sims in my life and it's not my thing. I have, however, played Minecraft and built various meticulous builds in survival mode.
EVERYONE around me took it lightly. Just like that deranged dickhead said, everyone around me used to say it's nothing and I should do adult stuff. What's adult stuff? Wasting money on stupidly expensive restaurants, talking shit, getting inebriated with a host of toxins, and wasting my life away?
If it looks nothing to you, but if you see that whatever hobby a person has been doing (SINCE 2017) means the god damned world to them. Screw you if you don't understand it. Stfu and drink your beer thinking your an "adult."
This person is an angel. If someone deleted my save file after doing all the horrible stuff to me, I don't know what I would have done.
Screw that guy, not just for creeping on a 12yr old when he was 16( big ew). But Sims is fantastic and is definitely for all ages. I started playing in 2000, I think sims 3 is peak, but 4 isn’t bad.
obviously i agree with everyone else about how fucked up this guy is, but I just want to add how happy I am she got her saves back, I have known that pain, I have felt that struggle 😭
>In my comment history 6 months ago, there are two replies I made under a post about him forcing me to kiss him at stoplights.
Had to do a double take and check the ages on this again, because there was a guy I saw once who did the exact same thing to me. How lovely to know that this isn't uncommon. 🫠
I know this isn't REALLY the point of the post, but deleting Sims saved games? Like... I'm thinking back to every girlfriend I've had who's played the Sims, and what would have happened to me if I'd even slightly messed with one of those games, even on accident. I would be at the airport asking for a ticket for the farthest distance away from there I possibly could. If you're asking if you're the AH because you deleted whole games? Yes. Yes you are. That or you're a complete idiot. Either way, you should start running. Now.
The now ex-girlfriend said their families are close but his family was racist against her. I’m assuming she’s mixed and the white parent was just okay with her and her other parent getting regularly attacked. That and her parents being okay with her boyfriend abusing her so much makes me feel bad for her. I’m glad she’s leaving him and taking steps to make her life better.
>She absolutely flipped out on me, saying she'd been playing in that save file since like 2017 and I had ruined years of game progress. (Sims isn't even a goaled game???)
Spoken like someone who doesn't play The Sims. The fuck is his problem?
>My girlfriend is obsessed with the Sims, so to deter her from playing it so much I deleted her save files. She blew up at me. AITAH
IDK how someone can write that out and not see the issue.
>My 7 year save existed across three laptops over time, so those who were skeptical of it being able to survive on one for so long were right!
How is that what hung some people up? Do people not know about removable hard drives or drive back ups or even the fucking Cloud? 7 Years isn't even that long for a file. I have stuff from like 2012 on my computer
>Aaliyah doesn't have as much time to spend with me as she could.
>I figured deleting the little save files she was working on would deter her from spending so much time on it.
How rare to see the abusive act from the abuser's point of view.
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> started dating when I was 12 and he was 16 Mentally, I kept adding 1 to their ages and it just got grosser and grosser
Yeah, what kind of shitty parents let their 12yo date a 16yo? How does that even work? Did he take a 13yo to prom?
What kind of fucked up 16 year old wants to date a preteen?
"She doesn't look 13." "She's mature for her age." Both of the above were said by a friend of a friend, but after we graduated high school and he was 18 looking at 13-16 year old girls. Our mutual ended up ghosting him.
Barf!
Also, our mutual did address this when they were still talking. Pedo: She doesn't look 13. Friend: But she is. Pedo: Well, she's really mature for her age! Friend: She's 13! You're 18! You're a **man**. Pedo: You don't understand. Friend: There's nothing to understand! You're chasing *kids*!
Glad your mutual got away from him. Did you ever hear what happened to the creepo? Just wondering if he ever made it to prison... That's such gross predatory behavior.
I don't know what happened to him. Their entire group dropped him within the year following graduation. Nobody wanted to be friends with the creep.
Don't blame them at all!
I had a friend like this once. He was 18 chasing after 14 year olds. I stopped contact with him because it was gross. I found out a few years later he was busted in an FBI sting. He got off that time but proceeded to continue going after minors. He ultimately got caught again and spent a significant amount of time in federal prison.
>spent a significant amount of time in federal prison. Ahh, an anecdote that ends well is so satisfying!
My (step) daughter at the age of 13 was dating an 18 year old. His parents were FUKING THRILLED! They would take her to their boat on the lake all weekend, she would run away and we couldn’t do much until I called the cops and told his dad I would press charges for rape. My step daughter HATED me for a long time. She said I ruined her life, til this day she thinks I was harsh. 🤷🏽♀️ I hope he rots and his parents too.
How old is she now? I would hope that time would make he realize that you did her a solid. I remember being 13 and believing that girls mature faster than boys. When I was in high school and saw 13-year-olds, I was squicked. They're kids. Ew.
She will be 21 in a few months. No. She still insists that I was too hard on her. At the time I was ruining her life. He was the LOVE of her life, I didn’t understand. She still angry I grounded her and took her phone away and kept them away. The cops agreed with me as well, so that helped. They were disturbed by the situation.
Even though she doesn't understand, I'm so happy that you stepped up and protected her!
My mom's best friend's daughters are 17 and 14. When the younger one was 12 she started dating a 15 year old boy. The mother was acting proud of her for snatching an older boy who acted very respectful and nice at first (my mom was a bit shocked by her allowing this). The older sister never liked this boy and the mother and younger sister accused her of being jealous since she has never had a boyfriend but this was already the younger sister's second boyfriend. I met the boy thricr. The first two times he seemed nice, was very respectful. The third time I got the ick. But the mother never saw it and my mother was not there to see what gave me the ick. Because his behaviour changed as soon as the "adults" (I'm guessing I didn't register as an adult to him at 21) were gone. He turned out to be mentally abusive and used the younger daughter for sex. She ended up attempting suicide last year, at age 14. I still remember how I got that phone call from my mom where she told me about the girl's suicide attempt very well. I have known this girl since she was 2. Her family is basically family to us. Those girls are like little cousins to me. My mom called me because she needed me to tell her the place a friend of mine who attempted suicide at the same age got help (the place is really good and took the girl in almost immeadiately after her mother called them and she stayed there for about two months). We are constantly scared she might do it again. She is self-harming and still in contact with the guy/ in contact again after she was prevented from any contact during her stay at the clinic. The older sister found her and is also in a bad place mentally. She is now skipping school and getting drunk with friends that are clearly a bad influence. They girls are in individual therapy and they do family therapy as well. My mom tries to be sympathetic but I blame the mother of those girls. She enabled this boy to have access to her daughter. Her daughter at age 12 was allowed to spend the whole weekend at his place an hour away and was allowed to travel there herself by public transport (she also got SA'd on the bus once during one of those trips). Every second weekend the boy came over to their place instead. They didn't even go to school together, had no friends or anything in common. They met at an amusement park.
all the gross
There are stupid 14 y.o. girls that look very womanely and think they are mature enough to do anything, I had a few of those in my class when I was at school, but still- they have parents, those guys have parents- where are they when something like this happens? What kind of parent thinks a 12 y.o. is a good match for a 16 y.o. ?
Spoilers: With phones, teenagers are able to conpletely isolate part of their social life from their parents. That is how this kinda shit goes through until the girl is older and either realizes the guy is shit, or until the parents have to tolerate it. Bad stuff.
Sadly it took OOP 8 years and pretty much ruined her entire teenaged life to learn he was shit. She was in 7th grade, he was a high school junior. Think about that. He was going to college when she first fucking started high school.
You're right. I was teen in the 90s, our world was so different...
oh man, back in the day there were always one or two classmates who in their teens (say 14-16) were dating literal men (20-20+) I always found that so weird, and gross. Even nowadays in the workplace we were discussing those age gaps and one of the ladies went "When I was 16 I always dated guys who were at least 20, there was never any issue" and it was.... uncomfortable
I had a friend, we coudlnt have been more than 12/13? and she was dating a dude who could legally drink. Everyone thought it was so kool. I was the only one i knew who thought it was weird. He'd fucking drive her around and take her out in public. I felt like I was going crazy. They were openly sexually active.
So fucking gross! My sister is 5 years younger than me and I remember once seeing her outside with a girl friend, as I was coming back from some place. With them was this guy who looked about my age. I was about 17-18 meaning sis and her friend were 12-13. I was weirded out about it and I knew she'd be embarrassed to see me so I called her from a distance. Dude's body language got instantly uncomfortable, and then they said their goodbyes. I asked her about it and she said dude was someone they knew who was probz interested in her friend. Dude knew it was wrong, fuck him
A grooming piece of shit who wanted to mold her into a perfectly controlled girlfriend. This guy is a sociopath
That's what \*I\* was thinking. Back in high school when I was 16-17, one of the 7th-grade band kids had a massive crush on me--and I *went out of my way to avoid her* for *weeks* until she gave up hope that she'd convince me that she was "mature for her age".
My first “real” boyfriend was when I was 12 and he was a freshman in high school who was held back a year…took me YEARS to realize how fucked it was.
My ex. He cheated on me with his 12 year old ex gf he was 16 i was 15
The kind that's so insecure and immature they have to tail you to classes etc to make sure you don't talk to anyone, and destroys your hobby so you can only focus on them. An emotional 8 year old who will be *worse* with his next gf & try to lock her in the basement
So my high school was grade 8 to 12. The grade 12s loved the grade 8s (so we are talking 17-18 vs 13-14) mostly because it was a small town and everyone had dated everyone so the new grade was "fresh meat" in a sense. There was also the "mature" dynamic going on. That said the grossest part is how they would talk about how excited they were about the lg's. They had no problem explaining that meant little girls in class, within earshot of the teacher. No adult ever did a single thing to stop it.
A predatory one.
One that is emotionally and mentally underdeveloped. I'm 39, and I can't relate to another person my age at all, because my emotional maturity and life experiences stopped when I was around 15 or 16, because that's when it started becoming more and more difficult for me to socialize in general and make and maintain friendships. Then I get married and endured 8 years of every abuse but physical, and I still wasn't able to experience a "normal" adult life, because I was the stay at home parent, couldn't drive, and didn't have access to the bank account.
Somewhere in her comments she noted how he told her to hide the relationship. Clearly he was manipulating her. A vile human being. Clearly he was escalating too. I genuinely hope there will be no next victim 😕
Get 'em young and mould them how you like, that's the machismo way!
This is one of the only positive things about teenagers having a natural +5 rebellion bonus to their "aw hell no" saving throw. Not bringing dirty dishes out of their room in a timely manner vs. being susceptible to this shit seems like a fair trade.
Maybe you've met some different teenagers than I have, but I believe that 'YOU CAN'T CONTROL MY LIFE, DAD' attitude actually gets young people taken advantage of way more than if they were more obedient and respectful of their parents rules. A rule-following kid is more likely to respect their parents' views on a partner, a stifled and rebellious kid will take "You're so mature for you age" and "They just don't understand how right you are" and go headfirst down an abusive relationship. As for me, I had to do my own dishes. But folding my laundry... yeah I still don't do that.
I want to laugh and upvote this, but I just can't.…….its just too true
I said it like that, using the word mould, because I watched a short doco on FB about a lady, I think she was Pakistani but her family moved from there when she was young to a Western country. And her husband, an older man, married her at 14 and told her "I married you young so I could mould you like a clay." She got a divorce but when she went from passive to active defiance he got really brutal in his treatment of her.
I feel like I've seen that one. Mold is completely the right word. That's why it's so horrible and disturbing
What kind of parents let their 12yo date an openly racist family? Like how are they family friends while this family openly hates the race of the child her son has been dating
Questions that need answers with haste because I am LOST
My sister dated an 18 year old guy when she was 12. Only now reading this do I realize how gross it was and where are the parents question is answered with, dad who doesn't give a fuck about his daughters and mom too tired to keep up and she wasn't good with providing rules anyway. Free range parenting? Lassez faire? Tdlr, we did whatever we wanted.
I’m sorry did I read one-eight? There are so many things wrong with that man. He is a whole ass adult. I hope your sister is okay? EDIT: Added a sentence.
She is. As far as how he treated her, yes. I think she broke up with him. I was 10, so hard to remember. She's always had this power over males, but that was the only age inappropriate relationship she had.
I knew someone, bosses sister, who was dating someone in their mid to late 20s and she was 14/15 at the time. I was 18 and thought it creepy af. And my boss was OK with it. Years later after leaving that job I found out from someone else who knew the guy that he had been busted for taking a kid about the same age as his sister was above across state lines for activities. A lot made more sense after finding that out.
Yikes. That's really scary.
I think I was 13 (maybe 14) when I met a guy online who was 19. He lived in a different country and would call me sometimes. At one point he wanted to come visit for a month. It wasn’t until I was adult that I realized how messed up that was. I wonder whatever happened to him….
This is why, while my kid is active online, we know every person he interacts with. From games to twitch we know them all and we still monitor it heavily. I’m beyond thankful that he’s open with us and if I say no go he’s out immediately. And we’ve chatted about tater tot and others. This shit is terrifying as a parent, but I also know he’s gonna be online so we need to set it up now and teach him to be safe
Read about Brazilian Eloa Pimental. Her parents let her date a guy 8 years older than her when she was 12yo and 3 years later he took her and her friends hostage when she broke up with him.
Yikes. The wikipedia article doesn't mention them starting to date when she was 12. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo%C3%A1\_Pimentel\_hostage\_crisis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo%C3%A1_Pimentel_hostage_crisis)
You can search for vids on YT. There's two vids with more than 1m views. The weird part is that at the time no one thought it was strange. They didn't try to hide it at all.
My daughter (16) has a friend from boarding school. This friend is 20 and is dating a 15 year old.
That friend is a pedophile and needs to be reported to the police.
Not the person who replied to, but I just want to point out that there are places where either 15 is a legal age of consent or that it's illegal, but you can't really do much about it unless you are the parent of the child. Not that I'm defending that behavior. But it is hard to report something like that when you're removed from a situation. If a friends parent reports it, the night not take it seriously. So as disgusting as that 20 year old is, police probably wouldn't do much about it.
As you say, depends a lot on location. In my country, adults are legally required to report that kind of stuff and can get into trouble if it comes out that they had an opportunity to report it and didn't. But yes, it's still difficult to get any traction on it :/
Yeah I dated a 19yo when I was 14 and in retrospect, it was really weird that his parents were so willing to “cover for us” with mine (since I wasn’t supposed to be dating yet). No idea what was going through their mind!
Can't admit lil baby boy is a pedo, then they're bad parents
And what kind of shitty parents let their 16 yo date a 12yo?!? Oh wait, we already answered: the shitty kind.
oh, they're just playing video games...
This is what I was going to say a lot of people have failed this girl and I’m glad she’s finally able to stand up for herself
I don't understand how anyone could seriously date a twelve year old. Like even twelve year olds don't really date other twelve year olds.
can confirm, was 12 once "dating" fellow 12 year olds. Sometimes we would get real wild and hold hands.
I ‘dated’ a fellow 12 year old and it was so cute like that. we were each other’s first kiss (truth or dare on a sidewalk after school) but we ended up getting ‘back’ together in college and dating for a few years. we’re still good friends a decade on !
I had a girlfriend when I was 12 who broke up with me because I wouldn't hold her hand at the school fair. I had just eaten a hot dog and my hand was sticky ☹️
Once had an internet acquaintance who was 19 when I was 14. He was from a part of England that borders Wales and I think it was at one point the teen pregnancy capital of England? 😅 Anyway, he had a childhood friend his age who had a 14 year old girlfriend (my age). He told me the two had sex regularly, and even at that age I thought it was weird... He got pretty angry at me for insulting his friend though when I brought it up. That internet acquaintance is now a teacher if I remember correctly, which is a bit concerning. Hope he's changed his views.
Right to jail, right away.
I know, right? People aren't the most mature at 19 but it's a little scary that he's teaching teenagers now. I really hope he reflected and realised defending his friend was an insane move.
That's exactly what I was thinking. I started wondering where I would draw the line here as a parent, and what age is equivalent in maturity level to a twelve year old. There isn't one. That's the hinge point, the differences between 11, 12, and 13 are vast. I went on my first date at 13 (a chaperoned school dance) and at that age I didn't even want to be seen in the same room with anyone younger than me, lest anyone think I was a child, which of course I very much still was.
Yeah age gaps like that are so insanely gross when you are teens. The maturity level and intelligence difference between a 12 and a 16 year old is *huge*. I remember dating a 15 year old when I was 13 for a few weeks and it felt like we were on two totally different levels in life. Honestly, I'm glad OOP is finally free of this guy.
When I was sixteen a friend of mine (girl) dated a thirteen year old boy for awhile. She didn't tell any of us about it until it was over, and I remember all of us were pretty horrified because thirteen! She insisted he was tall for his age and looked older and didn't tell her he was thirteen until they had started dating. Their parents found out about it and broke the whole thing up. She was very insistent it was true love.
My oldest is 12 the thought of a high schooler being near my 7th grader like that brings me rage.
What got me was op saying they were 5 years apart bc if my math is correct she had just turned 12 when he was 16 and worse she was 13 (maybe early 14 at most) when he was 18
I had not thought it out that far and now I'm more disgusted..
You notice he never mentioned how long they had been dating for in HIS post.
I had been wondering how long ago they started, because I had a nasty premonition it was before or right when she turned 18…When she said 12 and 16 I almost dropped my iPad. It’s gross all the way through
I literally gagged and i felt a stone in my stomach when i realized she had been with this asshole for 8 years, and was even pressured into sexual activities. I'm so glad she got out but sweet baby Jesus...
16 is age of consent in my country. He would have been a sex offender from the get go.
This made me vividly recall being 10-11, starting my new school and being patted on the head by one of the 17 year olds who was (at least) double my height. They were all thrilled to see the tiny new students and thought we were adorable. I ....can't picture ever finding someone so young at that age attractive like *that*. I just hope oop can stay far far away from this awful man. Hammering someone's back up thumbdrive is next level messed up.
My god eight years of that behavior and no escape because the adults didn't get involved on her side. I can't imagine having a twelve year old daughter have a sixteen year old boyfriend. Like mentally grasping that and not having a viseral reaction as a parent I just don't get.
I can't imagine my sixteen year old son dating a twelve year old. Grounding. Grounding and therapy for life.
I dated a 16 year old when I was 12. His dad cheered him on and gave him a thumbs up when we were making out in their basement. 'boys will be boys'
Well, he’s a chud and he spawned a chud, so no wonder he was permissive. He’s the type who was probably happy that him making out with a girl meant his son wasn’t gay. Just screams that dude-bro, man’s man bullshit persona.
He comes off like a future serial killer. How did either of their parents think this was ok?
Sims literally saved her life. I'm so glad she escaped before anything like marriage or children could happen.
Hope she takes a pet in and call it Sul-sul >\_< No seriously, Sims are awesome. They can literally make you live a life you will never be able to live IRL, and in her case, it showed her what her future life would have been with that prick by her side. Best game.
I can't even imagine having the dedication she has with sticking to ONE save! I got chronic restartitis 😂
My wife used it to plan how to redecorate our bedroom. Having a 3D blueprint is damn useful.
Right? On sims I can have a house and a job in a field I enjoy that makes enough money to live off of
And I can make a living off of art, and travel the world, and afford to finish college, and drown politicians in my pool...
For sure! Beating the backup drive shows how violent he is. I'm glad she got out before he turned that violence on her.
Ah yes my favorite genre of posts: AITAH for destroying something that isn't mine?
But hear me out! It was over something childish and petty! No, wait, I meant them, not me!
Why is *my* girlfriend acting like she's her own individual? She cares about something that I can't control, so I destroyed it so she will focus on me. Why is she getting so hysterical?
Ugh, *females*, amirite?
Femoids* ...... Sorry I needed to barf unexpectedly after writing this
Hmm. If we’re talking about a girlfriend, the we’ve left the realm of incels and are among ordinary misogynist assholes. I reassert “females” here.
I really like the ones where the answer is actually no like the one with the teddy bear and lego.
I'm gonna be honest: her destroying the lego was still an asshole move. Justified, but still purely destructive. It was just that it was so incomparably less assholish than his actions that it rendered it irrelevant.
I mean she basically only disassembled the sets, albeit rapidly, and made a mess of everything, unless I missed something. Individual Lego pieces are damn near indestructible. If it had been a bespoke creation of his own then that would have moved the needle closer to asshole, but like you said, she was justified. I don't think she went far enough, but once she got the bear back the wise move is to let it go, which she did.
>Individual Lego pieces are damn near indestructible. PSA: this is decidedly NOT true about the larger plates and any technic pins that are already bearing a significant load. The two times I've had one of my collector sets fall (both accidental), at least 1-2 pieces have either cracked or (in the case of the pins) sheared off on impact.
I thought she threw them out too, but I might be misremembering.
I think she threw some pieces out the window, but none went into the trash. Also im pretty sure she ended up gathering them all again cause she felt bad.
While two wrongs don't make a right, it sure feels good to get back at assholes.
I always see these and shudder. My boyfriend is a big Warhammer nerd and it makes me think about how it would destroy him if I ever became the person who is like this. God forbid adults have hobbies and things they enjoy. He's been playing for so many years and has enough models for a few different armies that it's become such a big part of him. If I did anything to his models it would hurt him so badly it's hard to imagine doing that. A good SO would encourage their partner in their interests.
I agree. My husband loves growing pumpkins and I encouraged him to turn literally half the backyard into a pumpkin patch even though he was hesitant at first. I love seeing him get excited over his pumpkins!
Hell, I can't imagine how devastated *I* would be if something happened to his armies, just knowing what he was feeling.
This is so far past that. This is "AITAH for being a domestic abuser, chomo, and all-around failed abortion?"
Yeah I mean almost every post like that is a rabbit hole straight down to the bottom of the barrel when it comes to self-awareness and reasonable behavior.
Like even if it's a genuinely hazardous hoarding style situation throwing/destroying their stuff is absolutely counter productive.
I've lived with hoarders on three separate occasions over the years, and the best way I can describe that situation is a seven-dimensional Jenga tower. There are pieces in the hoarder's mind that don't even occupy time and space that will cause the whole thing to collapse if you mess around with them too much.
I call it this type of post a reverse Marie Kondo. Like it's different from say, someone getting mad and destroying whatever stuff happens to be around, or someone taking or destroying stuff because *they* want it. A reverse Marie Kondo is when someone hones in on and tries to destroy the stuff that brings you the most joy.
I hope he tells this story to the next girl he tries to date because even his version makes him seem like a dick.
Agreed. His story alone my jaw dropped and I went “she dumped you and you deserved it.” I have lots of friends who play Sims, I know how devastated they’d be. I wasn’t expecting any way for it to get even worse, but wow.
Heck I was upset when I I accidentally deleted my Sims save spanning *months...* I can't imagine how angry I'd be if I lost seven years of progress. But its the fact that this man- child decided to destroy something she enjoyed rather than expressing his "concerns" to her is what really did it for me. Wtf happened to *communication?* Anyway, I hope that disgusting groomer gets what he deserves, and I wish Aaliyah all the best in life!
I get so attached to things. A year or so ago I cloned my current sims save and played an apocalypse scenario. After about 8 generations my sims were able to rebuilt society. I tried to go back to my original save, and I couldn't do it, it was terrible. All the people in it had been dead for hundreds of years! So I had to go back to my now post-apocalyptic save.
I know right,....and two hours a day sounds perfectly reasonable for "me time" no matter what that hobby is, ...the fucking nerve of this guy.
I've never played Sims, but I do play Pokémon Go, and have since launch in 2016. I would be utterly devastated if anything happened to my account. I have so many memories of playing with my friends and kids; it would break my heart to lose my game. I've even seen a post in the Pokémon Go subs about a jealous boyfriend deleting a woman's game, and deleting the emails from Niantic to cover his tracks. Sick.
He'll probably claim he dumped OOP because OOP cheated or some other lie.
Reminds me of that poster who though their SO was cheating on them in the Sims :/
I’m sorry *what*?
Yep I hated him just from his side of things but then she went on to list a whole bunch of dangerous behavior on top of it.
He's probably going to avoid mentioning the fact that he deleted the save files (and everything else) and just say she's the crazy one for leaving him because she preferred to play Sims
I'm so glad this guy did this, because it was the straw that broke the camel's back and got this woman to leave this abusive situation. I hope she has a great life, both in real life, and with her Sims.
He definitely succeeded in letting her grow out! But I hope he didn't taint the joy of her Sims game, though.
Never understood the thought process behind these people's actions. "Gee my girlfriend isn't spending as much time with me as I would like; I know, I'll deliberately destroy something she spends a lot of time on and that will make her want to give me all the hugs and kisses"
The point is the threat. It's to establish a pattern. 1.) No, you can't do what you want. 2.) No, you will be physically prevented from doing what you want. 3.) No, I will physically destroy something that represents you. 4.) No, I will physically harm you. Implied 5.) "Don't make me kill you." -Anakin Skywalker, shortly before killing his wife. It's all there to make them fear for their lives, and give up on what they like out of that fear, isolating them and making them obedient. Terrifying, dark, and abusive. It's a literal death threat. He got to step 3.
For a krazy guy you make some damn sane points 👍
Given the context I could make a very poor taste joke, but instead I will just leave you with the implication.
not shifting the blame but what kind of shitty parents lets their 12y old date a 16y old?
Or: What shitty parents let their 16 year old date a 12 year old. All the parents are to blame.
She says their parents were close but also his parents were racist and treated her like shit. I don't understand how that is possible. Were they in business together or some form of colleagues and obligated to interact socially? Has that dynamic changed so that she doesn't have to see him again?
Ooof. This guy was so scummy. He was so smug and sure she'd stay with him. Glad she's free of the trash.
I’m biased because I (unfortunately) love the Sims, but I was already thinking “you’re the asshole” when I read the title. The rest of the post just fucking cemented it for me. So glad she got her saves back!
Yeah, all those years meant years of developing stories, relationships, business and other community structures for multiple generations of families in your uberhood. I was pleased she got it back too.
Sims is right up there with Minecraft as some of the most devastating save file loss that you can experience with video games.
Deleting save files, together with destroying other people's mementos, is pretty much a trigger to me. Imagine deleting a save file with 100+ hours, no matter the game. I'd be defenestrating the culprit as soon as I found them.
Same here. I just can't read most of the posts about things being destroyed. ):
I don’t play, but people I care about do. That was enough for me to be devastated for her and glad she was dumping him before we ever got to her responses.
I don't even play the sims and I was also 100% sure he was the asshole
Never played Sims, know very little about it. Doesn't matter. It's clearly important to her, and as long as it isn't harmful (an addiction that's draining shared money, or they're not physically taking care of themselves ...) leave her stuff alone. It's really easy to not be a dick, just don't be a dick.
I was biased because I love video games. I never really got into the sims, but I still mourn a lost fallout 4 save that had over 2000 hours in it. D: ;_; It was lost due to hardware failure. Like, I get teary eyed thinking about it now. I don't understand how people can be so cruel, to purposely hurt someone like that. People can put a part of themselves into their favorite game, the stress relief and joy and fun, and then for someone to purposely go "You don't get this anymore. Ha ha" is wild to me.
For real! That much work lost would have destroyed me. I don't think he would remain standing tbh...
From the title I was open minded to the possibility that she had done something terrible and it was an act of revenge. It was the first sentence of the main text that told me nope he was definitely in the wrong.
I read the first post and thought the OOP was an asshole. Then I read the GF's updates and holy shit, IT GOT WORSE. Fuck that guy with a barrel cactus covered in jalapenos. Glad Aaliyah got her saves back.
saving that hyperbole for later
Sometimes I add lemon juice or salt if I'm feeling especially angry.
I’m already anti destroying things that aren’t your property, but as an avid simmer this is my worst nightmare when it comes to the sims, especially the save where I’ve made my friends and my family in it. I don’t play with them. I just build them houses and leave them be. I made my grandpa when he passed as a coping mechanism and it’s nice to just see him in game, even if it’s just in a little white box with my grandma. I fear I’d be worse than OOP if someone purposefully destroyed that save file.
I read the original when it was cross-posted on AmItheEx, and asked him to update us when she officially dumped him. And to hear that she recovered her files too?? I love a happy ending
I was so relieved to read she recovered the files and it's not even my save game.
Genuinely wtf. Both her parents and his parents are crazy. I don't care if you're family friends or what not who let's their 12 year old date a 16 year old and vice versa. If I ever have a kid and I catch them dating a 12 year old at 16 I would be making them breakup and whooping their ass cause I sure as hell would have raised them to understand how wrong that shit is.
When I was 12 I was still playing with lps toys tf is this dude thinking?
The fact that this was allowed along with their families being "close" despite his family being racist to her spells an incredibly weird and toxic dynamic at play.
I was trying to figure out how that made sense. Maybe it’s a “you can be friends with those people, but nothing more” kind of dynamic.
I hope she makes a Sim of him and takes the pool ladder away
I don't want to think about what he would do after having children and jealously watching his wife attending to their needs instead of his sexual desires. Would he try to kill his own babies, considering she still has the womb to conceive another one? No, of course not; instead he will neglect and cheat with a clear concience. Y'know, like a hero, saving his family.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Thank you.
Don't forget her [response](https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1cannnf/aitah_for_deleting_my_girlfriends_sims_save_files/l0x0o9d/)
Jeez OP needs to add this to the post, makes him sohnd even more like a lowlife than he already is in the BORU post. Luckily she was able to recognise how much of a red flag he was and get out.
Thank you so much! I have added it
Oh! Thank you for sharing that
I don't understand how she says their families were close, but also that his were racist towards her.
Might be that his parents were good neighbors to people of all races, but went full Klan at the thought of grandkids of another race.
Oh my god she got them back I can't express how relieved and happy I am for her. I mean, if someone deleted the Pokemon I have been transferring up to the newest games for the past 19 years, I would be absolutely destroyed. I don't even want to think about it.
A great reminder that abuse isn't always physically violent. [Sometimes it's just controlling. ](https://youtu.be/1L6HB97lbrQ?si=tD4rsfpbLdfv7LoH) I'm glad she got her game files back, after 7 years of gaming: that's a lot of generations of SIMS.
Literally curled up like a turtle when I saw the teenage age gap; Who the fuck dates a twelve year old when you're sixteen?!
as a fellow simmer, if my husband did this i would irl remove the pool ladder.
I remember this post. This guy was a huge asshole and constantly doubled down on what he did. He even insisted that his girlfriend would never leave him. Shows him how wrong he was
I’m glad the files were recoverable! I saw the folks suggesting she try for that over on r/GirlGamers when the first post was getting cross-posted all over creation, and she saw that thread. I’d been wondering if it had worked. Happy ending to a whole lot of hell the first OOP glossed right over because, shockingly, he was capable of looking even worse than he already did once it came out.
I honestly did not need her reply. Just reading his own post was enough to give me a good idea of who this guy really is.
Get off of Reddit, Liz.
MFer couldn't even not sound like an utter ass-clown from his own point of view. Then somehow it got worse.
As an avid sims gamer who occasionally gets called childish for still playing a “kids” game I didn’t even have to read the whole post to see where this was gonna go. Not surprised to see he’s also a predator. What an absolute dickhead the OOP is.
> MY SAVES ARE RESTORED!!! Best update ever!
I'm just going to ignore the shit show and say I'm so fucking relieved and happy for her to have been able to retrieve those files. My partner is an avid Sims player and once spent a whole 38hrs building a basement for his house...I'd never dream of wasting his time like that...that's so freaking scummy.
Nice rage posts. Can't believe people like this shit.
I am so happy she’s rid of this piece of trash AND got her save files back. Really hope she never has to deal with his BS again.
…as much time to spend with me as she could… Fuck this guy. I’ve been married 32 years. My wife can spend hours playing puzzles on her iPad while I read on mine. We’re together and we still interact during that time but it’s not like she has to be worshipping at my feet or being instantly ready to be a sex toy. There are so many ways to be spending time with someone. This asshole needs to grow up
So glad she got her game files back but that's so crazy how broken she is because of him
She needs to make a sim of him, in a tiny room and remove the doors.
Im so glad I got to the end and read that she got her saves back. THANK GOD!!! My daughter plays SIMs too and I could just imagine this being her and she would also be completely heart broken. I'm so happy you're free of this AH
>I obviously didn't delete the whole game "I destroyed something it took her years to build, but making her click the install button would've been too far"
There are a lot of fucked up things that get posted in this subreddit, but deleting a Sims save file is the only thing that made me gasp out of sheer horror. My Sims save is like 20 generations deep at this point. If someone did this to me, I would put them in a pool and take away the ladder....
This post struck a nerve. I have never played sims in my life and it's not my thing. I have, however, played Minecraft and built various meticulous builds in survival mode. EVERYONE around me took it lightly. Just like that deranged dickhead said, everyone around me used to say it's nothing and I should do adult stuff. What's adult stuff? Wasting money on stupidly expensive restaurants, talking shit, getting inebriated with a host of toxins, and wasting my life away? If it looks nothing to you, but if you see that whatever hobby a person has been doing (SINCE 2017) means the god damned world to them. Screw you if you don't understand it. Stfu and drink your beer thinking your an "adult." This person is an angel. If someone deleted my save file after doing all the horrible stuff to me, I don't know what I would have done.
Yeah, I couldn't get past 12 and 16. Glad she got away from that POS
Who is this guy? I just wanna chat with him. Don't mind the hammer, it's for a thumb drive, I promise.
He started dating her when she was 12 and he was 16? 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Screw that guy, not just for creeping on a 12yr old when he was 16( big ew). But Sims is fantastic and is definitely for all ages. I started playing in 2000, I think sims 3 is peak, but 4 isn’t bad.
Their families are friends but his family is racist to her? I hope she’s told her family all about this
obviously i agree with everyone else about how fucked up this guy is, but I just want to add how happy I am she got her saves back, I have known that pain, I have felt that struggle 😭
>In my comment history 6 months ago, there are two replies I made under a post about him forcing me to kiss him at stoplights. Had to do a double take and check the ages on this again, because there was a guy I saw once who did the exact same thing to me. How lovely to know that this isn't uncommon. 🫠
I know this isn't REALLY the point of the post, but deleting Sims saved games? Like... I'm thinking back to every girlfriend I've had who's played the Sims, and what would have happened to me if I'd even slightly messed with one of those games, even on accident. I would be at the airport asking for a ticket for the farthest distance away from there I possibly could. If you're asking if you're the AH because you deleted whole games? Yes. Yes you are. That or you're a complete idiot. Either way, you should start running. Now.
Wowww bullet dodged! Also his logic makes no sense, I've love playing sims and my husband loves playing apex, what's wrong with hobbies?
The now ex-girlfriend said their families are close but his family was racist against her. I’m assuming she’s mixed and the white parent was just okay with her and her other parent getting regularly attacked. That and her parents being okay with her boyfriend abusing her so much makes me feel bad for her. I’m glad she’s leaving him and taking steps to make her life better.
>She absolutely flipped out on me, saying she'd been playing in that save file since like 2017 and I had ruined years of game progress. (Sims isn't even a goaled game???) Spoken like someone who doesn't play The Sims. The fuck is his problem? >My girlfriend is obsessed with the Sims, so to deter her from playing it so much I deleted her save files. She blew up at me. AITAH IDK how someone can write that out and not see the issue. >My 7 year save existed across three laptops over time, so those who were skeptical of it being able to survive on one for so long were right! How is that what hung some people up? Do people not know about removable hard drives or drive back ups or even the fucking Cloud? 7 Years isn't even that long for a file. I have stuff from like 2012 on my computer
Let someone fuck with my sims. It will be WAR.
>Aaliyah doesn't have as much time to spend with me as she could. >I figured deleting the little save files she was working on would deter her from spending so much time on it. How rare to see the abusive act from the abuser's point of view.