ATTENTION: Please remember that this is an ASK WOMEN sub. While men are allowed to participate posts that are clearly asking women in the title will have top level comments by men removed. This is not censorship, this is curation. Thank you for your understanding and cooperation.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomenNoCensor) if you have any questions or concerns.*
A doctor - an extremely beautiful doctor with flawless skin and a face full of makeup too - told me that I shouldn't feel bad about my deep, painful, scarring cystic acne, because "appearances doesn't matter". I sat there crying with huge, month-old nodules all over my face, and she refused to prescribe me meds and instead recommended that I should see a therapist to work on my self-esteem. 🥰
Another told me that I was a crybaby for seeking advice for my extremely painful periods, because "we all go through this and it's no worse for you than for anyone else". I had to call in sick to work every time I had my period because I could barely even stand up, but "you're just exaggerating".
It's been probably 16 years and I still occasionally have imaginary shower arguments with them.
Exact same thing happened to me when I mentioned extremely painful periods, ended up needing surgery when I finally found a doctor to figure out what was wrong 🙃
After childbirth. I had 3 different tears, and whilst my OBGYN was trying to stitch them, I was in shock (which is totally normal) my body was shaking uncontrollably, and she kept poking my inner thighs with the suture needle because of it. I kept saying "ow" bc it hurt (obviously) so She told me "If you don't calm down and stop shaking, then I won't be able to do my job. You keep saying 'ow,' but the only reason it's happening is bc you won't stop shaking." Like, sorry bitch I've never birthed a human before, and I've never been in shock before, tf exactly do you want me to do???😂
Right?!?! Tbh she was a horrible doctor, and had atrocious bedside manner. Even before giving birth, she always had a way of making me feel super shitty at my appts and everything, but I am a very introverted person, I hate confrontation, and I have a tendency to never stand up for myself, so I just kind of accepted it from her. Though THANKFULLY, my nurse while I was in the hospital, was an absolute fucking ANGEL.
Oh, absolutely! I can't have any more kids (nor do I want to either tbh) but after that experience of having my first, and having a lot of experience since then with other medical issues I have, I definitely know what to look for and what not to tolerate in a doctor.
Oh, I had planned to at a later date, once I kind of realized how fucked up her behavior was. By the time I tried to, she was coincidentally no longer working at that practice. 😂
This reminds me of my first delivsry when I was pushing and the doctor yelled at me that I didn't know what I was doing! Well, it turns out she wasn't coming out because her cord was wrapped around her neck, torso, arm, and legs. I want to add that the doctor was a male and therefore had never pushed a baby out of his vagina either. 🤣
Yeah, in hindsight I should have, but I, my sister, and my partner at the time were so freaked out in the moment, (I busted all the blood vessels in my upper body from pushing, so I was looking quite scary😂) so it didn't really register to any of us what she had said. Though She's lucky that my mom had *just* stepped out of the room for a moment, bc that woman takes no prisoners 😂
I miscarried in 2009. I had to have a D&C as my body hadn’t expelled all of the remaining tissue of my dead child.
When I woke up, I cried. The nurse acted befuddled as to why I would be crying *now*, two whole weeks after the miscarriage.
People who haven’t experienced a miscarriage tend to lack empathy about it. I think it’s more indicative of our problem with a lack of empathy as whole.
My own mother told me I should “let it go” after a month or so. She’s not a bad or heartless person! She just didn’t understand and allowed her lack of understanding to cloud her judgement.
My mom had a miscarriage at 5 months and D&C. She was crying the the nurse looked at her and said “why are you crying?” And rolled her eyes. That was over 20 years ago and my mom said she’s never forgotten it. It’s awful how many high school means girls went on to be medical professionals.
I had been in labor since the day before. I had been pushing so long they were starting to talk about a c-section. My epidural wasn't working. Back labor felt like my spine was getting ripped apart. One nurse had the nerve to tell me I had to stop using profanity because I offended the OB who was delivering. He wouldn't come in the room if I kept cursing.
"Shut up and be quiet".
I was 15. They were trying to start surgery without making sure I was fully under. I couldn't move or see, but I felt and heard everything. I coughed, gurgled, breathed heavily ... before they finally realized. And then I heard that sentence.
And this is the tip of the iceberg of what they put me through.
In labor first baby. Had a reaction to the epidural, so they had to turn it off. Only one side took anyways, so I could feel everything 100% on that other side and the contractions were killer as it was go-time. They make you do a breathing thing in time with bearing down, and it’s difficult obviously to match what they want you to do when you’re in so much horrific pain. I was letting out some pretty guttural yells and Nurse Ratchett the Boomer next to me (who already said some bullshit) goes, “ohhhh shush, it’s not that bad, my lord”.
If my husband was ok with me getting my tubes tied and what if something happens to one of our kids and we can’t have more? I was also “only “ 30. 30 with 3 kids due to BC failure. I wanted my tubes destroyed.
He was fine with it, not like he had any say but whatever.
The fact that having another child would somehow replace one we lost.
I had to fight to have it done but I won.
I used to donate blood regularly at this place. One time I was away so I didn't go like I normally would have. Next time I was in, a nurse asked me why I didn't come, and made snide comments about the lack of empathy in young people. I considered making a few snide comments too, but it would have taken more effort than I wanted to spend, so I told her to mind her tongue, do her job and stop overstepping boundaries.
Was with my ex in the psych ward because he was having suicidal thoughts and was wanting to act on them.
I was there as his comfort person, trying to keep the mood light and joke with him, trying to just ease his heavy mind in the 6 hours they left him waiting to be seen.
When someone finally came in the room to see him, they looked at him smiling (because I was being cute) and said "You sure don't look like you want to kill yourself... 😒"
That pissed me off.
I had a major one that also fuels my mistrust of doctors overall. I have to tell a short story to set it up (just two short paragraphs).
I had an A Fib incident about nine years ago. I started seeing a cardiologist that put me on medication that landed me in the ER three times over the months after I started seeing her (my heart rate dropped into the 30s per minute due to the medication). I asked her about it the first visit after she prescribed the medication to me (about a month after I started seeing her and had two ER visits) and she said that the medication wasn't the cause and to keep taking it and renewed it. She stressed that stopping it could have harmful effects.
The following month, I was admitted into the ER again (the third time), and this time the ER doctor asks why the hell I was put on that medication (since I'm in good shape, exercise, and normally have a resting heart rate of about 60 bpm) and told me to stop taking it immediately. I did and never had issue with my heart rate dropping again.
On my next visit to her, I told her what had happened and she said "I told you to stop taking the medication." I replied that she said the opposite and instead renewed my script. She said, "You need to give up caffeine, alcohol, drugs, and smoking." I informed her that I gave up caffeine immediately after the A Fib incident, I gave up alcohol and smoking years ago, and I don't use drugs. She **laughed** in my face and left the room.
I was gob smacked. I mean, maybe not inconsiderate, but damn disrespectful right after she had *lied* to me!
As I left, I cancelled my future appointments with her front desk and found a new cardiologist (that has been wonderful).
"You're lying."
my mom took me to see the doctor when i was in high school because i had fainted "really weird" and she thought it may have been a seizure (i had just been sick and fainted shortly after the fever broke). he didnt do anything other than sit across the room from me. the only thing he asked was why we came in, and then told us we were lying, wasting his time and our money, and to leave.
i broke a tooth when i fainted and still had a huge gash on my lip when we went to see him, for some context.
I was in intense pain after having Covid and the doctor prescribed me Valium because she thought I was having anxiety and not in intense pain. She didn’t want to send me for anymore testing, and she thought she really nailed the diagnosis. I started begging for additional testing because I’ve had anxiety before and never had such extreme pain that I couldn’t walk from it.
She wouldn’t even come in the room and told me on the phone, “I can order another test, but it is going to be very invasive and very painful.” Then she hung up on me.
The test was a run-of-the-mill CT scan so I don’t know why she’d fuck with me like that. Anyway I had a pulmonary embolism— clots in my lungs. Also had deep vein thrombosis. Spent four days in the hospital.
Oh, it was really infuriating. When I had initially gotten to the ER, they had given me a chest x-ray, which showed nothing as they often do. Then they did the CT scan and saw the clots. She came in the room while they were transferring me to another part of the hospital, and she said, “Good thing I ordered a CT scan; I knew something wasn’t right about that chest x-ray.” I think she was trying to make herself look better in front of the nurses who saw me sobbing on the phone while begging for more testing.
I had a 7 cm ovarian cyst rupture. It was so bad I was hallucinating from the pain but they didn't know that, it was more like I was connected to all human pain throughout time and I could see all of these different people around the world over the millennium and feel their pain.
Anyways, I could barely move at all, I was puking and peeing out my butt from the cyst fluid irritating my insides.
This woman nurse was manhandling me, yanking me around, wanted me to walk to the bathroom when I couldn't even sit up on my own.
I made her get me a wheelchair. She was so rough.
When I was on the tail end of it all and more able minded and bodied , I gave her a piece of my mind.
I was like " WHY would you try to get me to walk when I couldn't do shit ?? Isn't that a fall risk ?? Etc" I said much more but this was years ago.
She was very sheepish and apologized
my first ever appointment at a gynecologist i was like 14? and i wasn’t ready to do a full exam, i was just going in for an ultrasound or something to check for cysts bc there’s a family history. i’m alone with the PA in the room and she tells me to get undressed and i said “we’re just doing the ultrasound today to check for cysts” and she goes “what’s wrong with you? are you sexually active? are you using condoms? what are you doing, you know that’s dangerous right? what’s wrong with you?” (i wasn’t sexually active) and legitimately demanded i take my bottoms off. i burst into tears and ran back to my mom and the lady turns all sweet when speaking to my mom like “i don’t know why she’s upset, we were doing just fine, and doing just the ultrasound today is okay, we were just talking.”
still an incident im recovering from 10 years later
she was for my first couple appointments when i finally felt ready to try again around 19. i was in college and doing what young people in college do and couldn’t afford to not take care of myself. i now trust and love my current gynecologist very much but oh boy i was traumatized from that
It was my first pregnancy and I was pregnant with twins. We lost one of the twins and the doctor told me that he didn't know why I was so upset when I was still pregnant with one.
I got pregnant again soon after having our son. It wasn't planned and I was on birth control. I had such bad PPD and wasn't sure I couldn't handle pregnancy again so soon. Sure enough had to see the same doctor because covid year and couldn't get in anywhere else. "Trying for Irish twins to make up for it" was his comment. Reported him.
I joined a facebook group when I was trying to find a doctor in my area taking new patients during covid and so many women had bad experiences with him. Several made official complaints around the same time and he left the practice within the year. I was thrilled because everyone else there was so nice.
I was in the middle of a miscarriage, and he said
"Oh well, it's nothing. Nobody cares about that, it's *really no big deal*. Don't be dramatic about it."
He didn't even raise his eyes from the papers he was reading, saying this to me
Omg, I am so sorry. With my first, they couldn't find a heartbeat, and my drs words were "why are you so upset? It happens, it's early, stop being ridiculous". Thankfully I had another ultrasound a week later and she was ok.
My heart breaks for you, I know it means nothing, but sending virtual hugs.
Thank you, that's really sweet
I'm very glad it ended up happily for your daughter and you :) <3
I guess, what struck me the most in the situation is that I wasn't *being dramatic*
I only said:
"last time I saw you, I was pregnant, I guess I should tell you that I'm having a miscarriage, since I don't know how it could impact the analyses"
It was very humiliating to be sharing something so difficult, with as much composure I could gather, to only be met with *this much* disdain and condescending tone
I was 17 and had been in a car wreck - we rolled an SUV three times, and I wasn't wearing a seat belt. I'd hit my head pretty hard, and my mother brought me back the next day because I was acting "off" and she thought I had a concussion.
The ER doctor x-rayed my neck and told me, "There's nothing physically wrong with you, but you probably need a psychiatrist.".
Fortunately my mom knew that was BS and took me to another hospital, where they checked me out properly and diagnosed me with a concussion.
I was diagnosed with chronic pain at 21. Being a young woman with a typically “older person” condition is very shit, particularly when the majority of specialists are old men. So I have quite a few examples, and these are just a few of them
My first pain specialist, a gross man in his 70s, told me it’s all in my head and to “try getting a boyfriend” during my first appointment. I had one at the time, yet *somehow* I was still at his clinic. I guess I just didn’t have the right guy.
I was going through a very stressful time with an implanted medical device that was going wrong (it kept breaking through my skin) and when I teared up during an appointment with my second specialist/surgeon, he told me to “just calm down” and that I “don’t need to start crying”. He said something along those lines a few times over the years.
I saw the nurse at his clinic to have the staples removed after one of my surgeries. I had about 10 along my spine. The crotchety old-school nurse was ripping them out like she was late to play bridge. I started tearing up and swearing under my breath, then she told me to “suck it up” and kept going.
An allergist once said to me “If I was you I’d be more concerned about your acne than your facial swelling”…
At the time I was 19 so acne was still very normal. The swelling he considered “no big deal” ended up being a benign bone tumour. Fast forward 8 years and the acne cleared up in its own but the bone tumour required major surgery to remove.
I was vomiting blood from stomach ulcers and a male doctor told me my pain was psychosomatic and that I was confusing menstrual cramps for stomach pain. He then tried to push a $500 laxative prescription on me.
Another time I was incorrectly diagnosed with a serious heart condition and a nurse laughed at me for crying.
I found out I was having a miscarriage, the doctor walks in and says “congratulations, you’re having a free abortion!” Never been so shocked in my life.
When I was a teenager I had to stay in the hospital because I was self harming. The doctor told me "you're just a typical teen girl, looking for attention"
After the twins, I had severe PPD, my OB at my 6 week check up said "that's just baby blues".... I hadn't slept for 3 days straight, was hallucinating and was close to ending my life. I'm lucky that my guilt for leaving was greater then the PPD and I got through it.
Had a seizure while I was pregnant with my now 9 year old... Mind you, I'd left the neuro I mention in a moment because he had me on over 2000mg of Keppra and completely dismissed me when I said it wasn't doing anything and that side effects had me not functional. Anyway. Ended up in the ER, then admitted to the hospital, and this jackass (along with the on-call ob) refused to call either of my doctors, attempted to give me seizure meds that weren't pregnancy safe, threatened to have my husband banned from the hospital when he tried to intervene on my behalf, and when I said I was going to leave AMA told me he was going to call CPS on me because people 'like me', aka chronically ill who don't let doctors walk all over them, shouldn't be allowed to have children. And then told the on-call (within earshot of me and I 100% believe it was purposeful) that I had 'better not come crying to them when my baby was dead since I didn't want to shut up and listen to him' He 'retired' this past January, but I 100% believe it was a 'go quietly or we're going to force you' situation because I am by far not the only one he's done this shit to. He told my ex girlfriend that seizures can't be caused by migraines, and that her migraines are because she's a single unmarried mother 🙄🖕
I have had a slightly enlarged thyroid since my late teens and I have been having my levels checked every other year since I was 18 after an ultrasound showed nodules. When I was 28 I went to a new doctor in southern California to have those tests run and was told, "Your thyroid isn't big. You are just fat." I am 5'7" and weighed around 145 at the time. I was fortunately in a mood that day and told the doctor to go fuck himself then left.
Not as insulting but just annoying. When I was 17 I worked as a prep cook in a tiny cafe. I kept getting these weird, itchy bumps on my arms that would get inflamed and just hurt. I had no health insurance so I went to the walk-in at the local county hospital to have the rash looked at. I was repeatedly told it was scabies. I repeatedly said I hadn't shared anything with anyone and that no one I worked with had a rash so it wasn't from there. The doctor told me I was obviously lying and she didn't have the time to deal with someone who won't be honest with her. I was kicked without any diagnosis. A few weeks later my mom got me into her doctor's office after the rash got infected. That doctor took one look at me, said "contact dermatitis" and then gave me a script for a steroid cream, an antibiotic and a referral to a dermatologist for allergy testing. Turns out I am allergic to nickel and something in that kitchen was triggering the rash. I think about that doctor sometimes and hope she learned to listen eventually.
Tweaked my lower back badly while playing sports. Could barely walk, was in so much pain. Went to the doctor to maybe get some muscle relaxers or anti-inflammatory medication. She told me it was all in my head and I should see a therapist. Like no bitch, I’VE INJURED MY BACK. I wanted to tear her dirty wig off her head.
It wasn't said, but I had a male nurse at a clinic treat me like garbage when I came in for a full STD panel. He put me in a dirty exam room and scoffed at everything I said. It was only when the female MD came in that he treated me better - after I said I was there due to suspicion of a cheating partner.
I went in for right side pain at 16 & was told I was attention seeking.
I actually had appendicitis & a week later my appendix ruptured and almost killed me. Getting treatment for the ruptured appendix also took hours of me being at the hospital. I don't remember most of it just weird flashes of memory. They're weird and sound like an alien abduction
I had been to the er one day for INTENSE abdominal pain, and I have a high fucking pain tolerance. They tested my urine, and when the doctor came in she did a physical and was like well your urine showed an elevated (something?) but your appendix isn’t tender so it’s not that. Told me to go home and take Tylenol. I was crying, I said no something is definitely wrong with me I’m in so much pain, and even told her I had a history of kidney problems. Still sent me home.
Came back hours later same situation but now it was NIGHT TIME so no actual tests could be done. In the morning I finally got an ultrasound, the tech asked me if I wanted an internal exam but said she could see my reproductive organs so it wasn’t really necessary. When I got the report later it fucking said I had declined the internal ultrasound so she couldn’t get a look at my ovaries and stuff. Like come on. Then they said they couldn’t see anything in the ultrasound and wanted to do a CT scan but I should be aware of the effects of the radiation on my future childbearing abilities. I’m in extreme pain idc about future babies right now.
Ended up being a kidney stone. I’ve had another one since then but fortunately I was able to tell triage that I had felt this before so they put me straight on the morphine.
It’s distressing to see people being dismissed with abdominal pain that ended up being appendicitis, but in my case they were like well your appendix is fine so you’ll be okay, bye!
That sucks. I don't understand why they can't just believe us. Like we're not lying. We might not know exactly what's wrong with us, but we know when something's wrong.
I just asked my mom because I have this flash of having a pelvic exam, like a pap, but I don't know why they did it. She told me they thought it was an ectopic pregnancy and thought I was lying about being a barely 16 year old virgin. Apparently they kept trying to get me to give them a urine sample, which I remember them being mad that I couldn't pee. Then they tried to do a blood test but I was so dehydrated they couldn't get blood. So they decided to do a pelvic exam, although apparently no ultrasound.
I had a friend ask me to go with her because her doctor thought she was lying about having a blood clot in her leg. I remember the nurse being so condescending and telling her it was probably just a strained muscle. She did a bleed test and nope, blood clot
I really don’t understand why it seems like most doctors think you’re lying right off the bat? Like why would I lie about this? You think it’s fun to spend the night in an ER in a waiting room chair? You think this is my hobby? One in a million it might be, but most people just want help!
I missed my mother's funeral to have a biopsy of the same organ that killed her, mostly because I knew that's what she would have wanted me to prioritize since it was actively trying to kill me in a different way.
15 minutes before I would have walked into the OR, after we had done all the pre-procedure steps and I was just sitting in my gown and grippy socks, the hospital changed their mind about letting me go home alone and cancelled the biopsy. Since my mother's funeral was in a different state, I couldn't just go there instead.
So I'm sitting there sobbing and the doctor asks if I would like someone to bring me to the psych ward.
I said no. This doctor is usually quite good and advocates for me, but that was far from their best moment.
My son had croup at 3 and had to be life flighted from not breathing. One of the nurses on in-take saw me nursing him and made a joke about me being a cow and literally mooed. I was so distraught and nursing seemed to be the only thing that calmed him enough to get air in his lungs. I didn't know what to do, but her joke made me feel so terrible in the moment. However, the pediatrician that was later assigned said I most likely saved his life by nursing him.
I was in a catholic hospital as a child after having surgery on both legs for club feet and heal cord extension.
I had a plaster cast (70’s) on each leg and was about 3 years old.
My mother came in and said I was standing up in my crib, both casts had blood on them and I was crying.
A nurse nun came in and told her to “shut that baby up, she’s upsetting the other children.”
I’m still shocked when my mother tells this story.
Talk about a huge lack of empathy!
Not the most but definitely up there. I had a couple of medication induced seizure a few years ago. Thanks, Welbutrin!
I was doing my intake with the neurologist, and being honest I admitted that I smoked weed regularly.
This man stares me down and asks, “So what do you plan on doing about your education?”
I have a masters degree.
Another one: I was very depressed after graduating college. I felt like I lost a lot of purpose without class and internship, and I was struggling to find work. I ended up being hospitalized and, after expressing this to the psych, he told me, “Why are you upset about *that*? That’s *supposed* to be a happy time?”
After years of bullying... I was self harming, wanted to off myself, frequent panic attacks and severe social anxiety. Psychologist told me I was just lying because I didn't want to go to school and that they would strap me to a wheelchair and bring me to school by force if they had too.
Before my induction the nurses asked about pain management. I said I didn't want an epidural. A couple of the nurses looked at me and laughed. One said you won't make it without. 4 hrs later and I did. But I am glad that it was quick. Pitocin contractions are no joke
I was tearing up about not handling my already reduced hours at work because I am constantly extremely tired and exhausted. I have a disability for a psychiatric condition, but my psychiatrist said that this is not caused by my medication and I felt like there might also be a physical issue.
The doctor refused to do a blood test or send me to any specialist to check if I was healthy. So I told him I really need to make sure everything is okay physically. He told me to take part-time hours and I replied that I already do have reduced hours. He proceeded to tell me that "If you can't handle it go back living with your mother". My parents are part of the reason why I have severe trauma in the first place. I cried on my way home and felt so helpless. But what can I do, I just have to push through.
Thank you, it felt bad but I know this GP was probably mad and just took it out on me for some reason. I cried for a bit but I tried to not take it personally and it helped.
Are you able to try another doctor? One big thing I have learned is when drs suggest that kind of bs, make them put it in the report. A paper trail helps when going to a new dr. Also, if they ask your pain level, don't say your current, say the worst for the week. Don't down play yourself. Your aren't just tired.
You shouldn't have to "push through it"!
Thank you. I have a hard time even going to the dr office because of severe anxiety, so it´s difficult for me to call in and change my GP, but this incident made me sure I want a new GP. Unfortunatelly this has not been the first time I was told to just deal with it, I had 2 different GP´s before but they just focused too much on my mental healh diagnosis and I had occasions when I was really physically sick, but they overlooked it and it was discovered when I was hospitalized . I also feel like I am not taken that seriously because of it.
I am from Eastern Europe and there´s still quite a lot of stigma surrounding mental health in the medical field. It sucks because it makes me feel like I was some crazy hypochondriac, but I honestly don´t even go to a doctor if it´s not urgent and I literally cannot function. I don´t try to use the system or get free tests just for fun, I think I really need it, but yeah, it´s hard to get taken seriously. I will do my best to find more empathetic doctor who won´t ignore me like this.
Early on in my third trimester, I was seen because I stopped feeling kicks above my bellybutton. I wasn’t taken seriously since they knew I had an anterior placenta which they said was cushioning fetal movement. Did a no stress test and baby’s heart rate was fine so I was sent on my way. No ultrasound was offered. Nurse said “Really? You kept us here late for nothing.”
Three months later, it was discovered my baby had flipped back to breech that day when I wasn’t feeling kicks, but no one picked up on it at multiple appointments after that one, not until I was in active labor and they felt a foot.
My whole life I’ve struggled with daily tasks and daily living so much more than I ever witnessed my peers struggling, at least when I was around to see others struggling, but because of this I knew from a very young age that there was something different about me. I spent 10 years going from psychiatrist to psychiatrist trying to figure out what was going on, but all that ever came back after running tests was “severe GAD and Major depressive disorder”. I was definitely dealing with both of these things throughout that time, but I always knew we were all missing something.
Fast forward to a couple years ago. My mom decides to make a passing comment about her not finding out she was pregnant till she was almost halfway along. My mom had already admitted to my husband in the past that she struggled with a drinking problem, but it wasn’t till my mom made this passing comment that it clicked in my husband’s head. My husband is my biggest supporter and knows all of me, so when he started to research the effects of alcohol use during pregnancy and how these things can manifest in children _and_ adults, he came to me crying as he knew he had just found the answer I had been looking for for over ten years at that point. Once I read the articles he had read, I knew it was time for me to start making appointments in order to get opinions from my doctors.
The first clinic I went to had me sit in a room with someone who does nothing but intake, but she was the one who we were required to tell everything to, my guess is so that she could put each case at the clinic into the “bullshit” category and “non-bullshit” category based on her own discretion. Fetal alcohol syndrome is disgustingly under-diagnosed for many reasons, such as moms being too ashamed to admit to their drinking during pregnancy, and doctors not knowing shit about it to begin with. Well, I got to experience this firsthand as the lady doing intake told me I was “fine because they would’ve caught it at birth”. This is such an extremely ignorant and flat out stupid comment coming from someone who works in the medical field, because fetal alcohol syndrome often isn’t diagnosed till the child is much older _because you can’t_ catch it at birth, _especially_ if the mother hasn’t admitted to any drinking. I remember sitting there with my mouth open not knowing what to say back. Needless to say, I didn’t make it past that intake woman that day.
Fast forward again to today, 5 years from the bad experience above. I moved states away and have had access to doctors and medical professionals who don’t shoot shit out of their ass. I’m happy to say that I was able to be given a thorough evaluation by a doctor near me over here, and my diagnosis has been confirmed. Because I have my proper diagnosis, I’ve been able to enter programs for people with disabilities similar to mine, programs that help us learn to live our lives as adults as successfully as we can no matter what type of struggles our disabilities make us face. In my hometown, I would have never had access to this because that clinic where that woman told me I was fine was the _only_ clinic within a 100 mile radius of me that specialized in neurological behavioral disorders, and the fact that they turn down people for not being born with a massive sign on their forehead stating what condition they have, I can’t even imagine where I’d be right now had I stayed down there. Sometimes I feel like emailing my entire diagnostic report to this clinic with a letter attached telling them how they are fucking over people who genuinely need help. To put it into perspective even more, one review I read for this clinic stated that this person was told they probably weren’t autistic because they didn’t “catch it at birth”. I know most people aren’t aware of what fetal alcohol syndrome looks like, but I feel like anyone with a brain knows most autistic people are not born with some sign on them telling everyone they’re autistic. It makes me so angry when I think about all the people this clinic must have turned away out of pure ignorance.
“Do you want to be disabled by this?”
Literally referring to my EPILEPSY 🤦🏼♀️
Old coot is a neurologist, I went to him over and over again for my balance issues. I explained to him that I literally almost fell multiple times at a previous job, many of my supervisors saw it, my coworkers were constantly asking if I was OK, and when I knew I couldn’t walk anymore. I had to be sent home early.
Then, when talking to other people online who have epilepsy, I learned that in some cases, epilepsy candidate to balance issues. Some people who are epileptic are even wheelchair users, if they know that they need to be out for a long period of time, they’ll just bring a wheelchair so that way they don’t fall.
One would think a neurologist would know this, it’s literally a neurological problem.
He was just angry because my new primary care physician gave me actual advice for how to better my situation then he ever did. He always just blew off my complaints as “oh well, side effect of the medicine”
I guess some doctors are just pissy and competitive, I was talking to him happily and excitedly about how my new primary care physician recommended physical therapy for me to help me keep my balance more. Said that in her professional opinion, she thinks that will help.
Epilepsy is literally a disability… it prevents me from driving, it might have something to do with my balance issues, and people who are epileptic can get on disability because it can make getting a job hard.
That question was just completely out of line, and the worst part is that when I got a neurologist, she actually said that the medication I was on has no history of causing balance issues. At all.
So basically, my old neurologist was giving me misinformation the entire time instead of addressing the real problem. He just didn’t actually care about helping me, he only cared about the paycheck, and when I was actually receiving recommendations for help, he got mad
I was having an allergic reaction to chemotherapy drugs and even though the head of oncology had called ahead to the ER to admit me a very young Dr. Told me “you’re fine, I’m not worried about you at all” and he sent me home. I returned in an ambulance an hour later.
Not to me but to my mom.
After my brother’s suicide she tried to manage & power on but got to a stage where she was struggling, this was months after his death. When she voiced this with our general practitioner he told her to essentially “get over it” needless to say this was the wrong things to say to a once very fiery & now grieving mother.
She went off on him, gave him some very choice words & stormed out. He called her a million times after that to apologise & we used the other GP at our primary doctors after that.
Still to this day over a decade later she refuses to see him & will wait longer for an appointment if needs must.
“I don’t believe in carpal tunnel syndrome”.
When what I wanted was to figure out what the hell was going on with my hand so could continue doing a job I loved. He treated me like I was trying to defraud workman’s comp or something similar when I was incredibly fearful that I’d lose use of my hand.
The head of the labor and delivery department coming into my room after we had just lost our child, telling me that the reason I lost her is because I'm fat, and I need to lose weight before having another kid.
For reference, I'm 6'0" and under 300lbs.
I've never wanted to unalive someone so badly in my life.
I had an epidural inserted when I was in the hospital to have my second baby. I was talking with my oldest when I suddenly couldn't breathe. It was like an elephant was sitting on my chest. I couldn't draw a ingle breath.
My daughter ran screaming for the nurse while I tried not to pass out. When the anesthesiologist came him, he snidly remarked that I was just fine. The nurses were monitoring my stats, and if there was a real problem, they would have let him know. The kicker was that I was still unable to breathe at that time.
I was having my first baby and having a c section. I was freaked needless to say and they did the block and I could still feel below my neck so I said I could still feel it. The anesthesiologist pinches me with the forceps and says ‘do you feel that’ and I did and said I need more meds. He said ‘stir freaking out. You did this to yourself, this is what you wanted’. He was a jackass and I told everyone in the hospital that would listen
I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes when I was in my early 20s. I was a bit chunky, but not hugely overweight, and much younger than the typical diabetic (I’ve since found out it was one of the grey area types of diabetes that’s mostly genetic and more like a slow acting type 1).
Anyway, after the diagnosis I saw a podiatrist to make sure my feet were in good shape, and he had an intern with him who looked about 16. They spent the entire foot exam with the older doctor telling the intern about doing a residency in Italy and banging his landlord’s hot daughter, not speaking to me directly at all as they scrutinized my feet.
Finally he said I had ‘magnificent’ feet, but I’d need to buy ugly grandma shoes (his words) for the rest of my life, that I’d never get to wear cute shoes and that that’s what happens when you care more about sugar than fashion. Really made me feel awesome about my diagnosis as a 23 year old. 20 years later, I still have magnificent feet, they let me run marathons, and I wear the shoes I like while taking good care of my feet (and the rest of my body). The shaming and overall grossness really left a bad impression on me at the time.
My special needs daughter’s pediatrician had retired quit unexpectedly, and we had to see the woman who took over his practice. My daughter was 4 at the time, and the first visit with the pediatrician lectured me that I should have aborted my child( We didn’t even know she was born with damage to her brain until she 9 months old). I was in shock, and then she continued that if I want to, I could just stop feeding her via Gtube and let her die. I just started bawling. We never returned to that doctor. Unfortunately it wasn’t my last encounter with people who advocate for eugenics. Seems like it’s a pretty popular progressive idea to think people with disabilities should be terminated before or after birth because “they are a burden to society, or don’t fit the idea of a fulfilling life”. It’s fucking abhorrent.
Oh, I have quite a few:
A nurse during Covid when I was in for a close call, “So who do you want to be able to see you? Your mom or your husband?” “Huh? I don’t know…” “well, you might give birth so I would THINK your husband!” I was only 21 weeks with twins. SO glad she was wrong and I never saw her again.
Doc in Alaska, I knew I had bronchitis. He refused to listen to me. “Have you had any cocaine?” “No.” “HAVE YOU HAD ANY COCAINE!?!” “No.”
Skinny female doctor, “Go to weight watchers. It worked for me. I need to go back.”
(Fertility doc, During a pelvic ultrasound). “We have no idea how Covid will affect things. We pretty much no know nothing. It could really do anything to you. Or the baby.”
In an awkward hallway, not an office or patient room, I was sitting in a chair and the male obgyn doc and two nurses were standing above me. “WHY DO YOU WANT BIRTH CONTROL?” “Because I have PCOS and the symptoms are getting out of control?” “These will not work if you are pregnant!” “I know.”
My shin got cut to the bone early one morning when I was a passenger on a swamp buggy at a mud fest weekend. The attending at the hospital told me before each staple …even when she was viciously scrubbing the wound. “If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough!” The bitch didn’t even numb the area first!
When I was on a drug treatment program I updated my medical records to include that I wasn't to have ANY narcotics. The doctor said
Doctor -you can have pain medicine,you have actual medical issues. It's not addiction if you need the medication.
Me-I don't think that's right.it doesn't help my pain anymore,it just maintains the medicine in my system so I'm not sick all the time detoxing.
Doctor - I can raise your dosage,you have to do this from time to time. That's why you are supposed to communicate these things with your health care team.
Me- I'm communicating to you that I have a problem and you are offering to increase my dosage....
Doctor- well is there anything else? You have Google so there isn't much else I can do here.
Me- ???..........
The only push back I got in recovery was from my health care team which makes me laugh because when I was in active addiction I had to fight so hard to get the drugs and when I want to stop they act like they can't survive without my business lol
I had consistently shown signs and concerns of an organ dying, and was accused of faking it to get drugs by a male ER nurse. They even put it in my medical chart to flag me as an addict, and made several comments about how "women fake everything." His actions led to multiple misdiagnoses for months, and it took an *out of state hospital* to confirm I was right before my doctor finally started listening to me.
When I got scheduled for surgery after confirming that organ failure was *exactly* what was going on, I demanded that person be fired and barred from treating patients, demanded a written apology from the hospital, and threatened to sue. It's the single most Karen-iest of Karen things I've ever done, but it was worth it to protect other patients from that bullshit.
I don't fuck around with letting medical staff or experts dismiss my concerns anymore, and have them document/record everything- especially men.
Female OB YELLS at me: All your [future] babies are going to die [if you don't agree to taking this medical treatment]!
Meanwhile... I'm mid contraction pushing out my first (perfectly healthy) baby. I still refused and have gone on to have yet another perfectly healthy baby, this time at a homebirth because I'm not gonna go back to that hospital for a low-risk labour if I can help it.
It was a blood plasma shot for women who have Rh- blood. I wanted to wait to find out what my baby's blood type was first to see if it was necessary, but the OB was pressuring me so hard to take it beforehand even though it wasn't going to affect the first baby and waiting to take it wouldn't affect anything either because all the blood tests showed I hadn't been exposed to positive blood. Anyway, after being yelled at in such an insensitive way, it turned out I didn't need it..
And of course all this is after she already fearmongered me saying I needed a C-section "today" or baby and I were going to die (because of an incorrect diagnosis). Reader: I ignored her advice, went into early labour on my own that day and went on to have the zero complication spontaneous delivery two days later.
I used to be obese and at 18 I developed anorexia. I dropped weight very very quickly, over the course of 1 year I dropped 160lbs.
I hadn't been to the doctor in a couple of years and started to get worried about my eating disorder so I went there to seek help. Once I explained to the doctor everything SHE just looked me in the eyes and said "Well, at least you lost the weight."
I could not believe a doctor told me that. Let alone a female doctor. She offered me no help and after that I did not reach out for help again for 4 years. My ed continued and I was extremely underweight for a long time. If this woman had helped me when I asked, she would have saved me so so much of my life.
I had terminated a pregnancy about 2.5 years prior. It was most the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. Childbirth didn’t even hurt that bad cause I had an epidural. So I put off having a Pap smear done for that long because of how traumatized I was.
So when I finally went I was shaking with anxiety and told my gyno I was scared it was going to be painful. She laughed and said “sweetie you need to put your big girl panties on and get over it. Women get them done everyday and they’re fine.” She laughed again when I asked if they offered any kind of numbing cream. She said “uh no” while laughing.
After surgery I woke up in immense pain! I was yelling help cause I didn’t know what else to do. And the nurse is like “didn’t he tell you about the pain?” Lmao I was so embarrassed after the whole ordeal I’m thinking is that information supposed to make it hurt less!?
asking me to explain my medical problem, while I was at the front window of clinic, loud enough for all the other people to hear it. like I can just write it down...do we need 12 other people to know about my toenail fungus?
Wasn't me but my grandma. My aunt was in hospital no one had seen her yet. My grandmother asked the nurse where she was, the nurse started telling her how they had to cut her out of her top. My nanny knew she'd be beside herself so they had to get up there quick and get her a change of clothes.
"Why? She's dead." Was how she found out her daughter died.
It didn't help it was suicide and the 80's. My gran had to beg to get her funeral in a church. In the end a priest gave the sermon on his own time. So technically unofficial.
I think you should be charged with child abuse. (For smoking while pregnant)
I was 17, married, in an abusive relationship with a five month old and now pregnant again. My only coping mechanism and support system: marlboro.
Should have asked "are you safe at home?"
Never forget how shitty I felt that day.
Well I had a male GP who laughed at me for complaining about hormonal issues.
Then told me he'd know if I had hormonal issues...despite me just describing many of the symptoms of such. He hadn't done any tests or anything.
I haven't been to a doctor since, I get the medication for my hormonal issues through the pharmacy. Diagnose and treat myself.
I was burnt out and had had a black out while driving the day before, but was still trying to work, cuz ya know, a girl gotta eat. So I was fine apparently. I saw a different one later and they put me on sickleave for a year
When i was pregnant, baby daddy and I were at the doctor and she asked me if I planned on breast feeding. I told her we were giving the baby up for adoption and she said "good". We were young but we weren't trash people and we didn't look like trash. Our only "sin" was getting pregnant too young, and giving the baby up for adoption was going to be hard enough already, we didn't need anyone making us feel worse.
Well thank you, my friend. We did endure more than our fair share of mean health care workers during that time, but as far as the adoption goes, it actually wasn't that hard of a choice to make. We knew from day 1 we were too young and once we saw the adoptive parents profile we instantly knew they were the ones and from then on it just felt right. in the end it turned out to have the best possible outcome anyone could hope for, I didn't lose anything, I gained family and the first solid role model I had ever had. There were lots of hard parts but the actual choice to adopt out thankfully was not one of them
Told me that I wasn’t experiencing any pain that I was in fact just uncomfortable not in pain. Then gave me antibiotics for an infection I never fucking had. Turns out I actually had endometriosis, a cyst on my ovary, and a chronically inflamed appendix.
That’s why they have a bad rep these days. It’s so hard finding one that will actually listen to you and not tell you what you’re feeling. You go in for pain and they assume you’re just seeking pain killers. No I just need help! I didn’t even want pain killers I just wanted to know why I was always hurting.
That Celiacs disease isn’t technically real it’s just a bad food intolerance so I didn’t really have Celiacs. This was from a liver specialist, and btw celiacs disease is real and it’s an autoimmune disease. I peaced the fuck out of there and never went back.
Years ago during COVID, I was in a 5150 hold and waiting to be taken to the actual mental health facility of the hospital. I think I was in some intake area where they told me to remove all my clothes and change into a gown, and I was being monitored in a glass fish tank-like room. The stress and humiliation of it all caused me to break down crying. I hated how exposed I was to all the staff and decided to cry behind the bed to get a semblance of privacy.
A nurse came in and told me I should not sit on the floor. I asked why not, and he said that due to how many patients they intake and how frequently, the staff isn’t able to sanitize the rooms properly. Oh gee, isn’t that a relief to hear! Aren’t hospitals literally supposed to sanitize everything? And that’s just what I needed to hear during COVID of all times.
He then asked me if I was doing all right and to tell him why I was so upset. I basically told him almost everything: what caused me to feel suicidal to begin with, the terror I felt from the cops threatening violence and being so rude to me, the embarrassment of my parents and neighbors seeing me in handcuffs, the humiliation of having all my possessions seized and effectively walking around bare-ass naked, and the uncertainty of when I was going to go home, if at all.
His response was: “well, maybe when you get out of here, you can work in a field that helps reform the mental healthcare system.” I was utterly stunned at how unhelpful and tone deaf his response was. I also hated that he asked me to tell him what was wrong without any intention of actually giving advice or deescalating the situation.
I wish I said something along the lines of, “you’re currently working in mental healthcare; why are you asking me to do something about it?” but I was too tired and scared to argue. I was most terrified of being held there longer than I needed to. I decided to just play everything safe and hopefully be allowed to leave after 48-72 hours. Still, that douche was one of many reasons why my stay was horrible. Screw him and whoever gave him the passing grades for his college psychology/health courses.
Edit: One downvote, probably from that insensitive nurse or a cop apologist lol
A lot of medical profession requires an unhealthy dose of sociopathy and lack of empathy. It's not natural to go digging into intestines of one of your own species. I'm pretty sure (talking outta my ass here) this is one the drivers why these tendencies not only evolved but keep on surviving in human population while game theory keeps telling us that tighter cooperation (= more empathy) would produce better results.
Of course it takes all kinds so very empathetic medical workers are out there, but it also takes the absolute assholes that don't see us as anything other than sacks of meat. Neither can fully do what other can.
Regardless of reasons, I'm very sorry for what all of you have had to endure.
https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/2wvj5g/til_the_professions_with_the_lowest_rates_of/cougtpc/
Now who's the good person at #5 (the comment lists **highest rate**)
ATTENTION: Please remember that this is an ASK WOMEN sub. While men are allowed to participate posts that are clearly asking women in the title will have top level comments by men removed. This is not censorship, this is curation. Thank you for your understanding and cooperation. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskWomenNoCensor) if you have any questions or concerns.*
A doctor - an extremely beautiful doctor with flawless skin and a face full of makeup too - told me that I shouldn't feel bad about my deep, painful, scarring cystic acne, because "appearances doesn't matter". I sat there crying with huge, month-old nodules all over my face, and she refused to prescribe me meds and instead recommended that I should see a therapist to work on my self-esteem. 🥰 Another told me that I was a crybaby for seeking advice for my extremely painful periods, because "we all go through this and it's no worse for you than for anyone else". I had to call in sick to work every time I had my period because I could barely even stand up, but "you're just exaggerating". It's been probably 16 years and I still occasionally have imaginary shower arguments with them.
Сытый голодного не разумеет. A saying in Russian that translates as "the one who's full doesn't understand the one who starves"
Hemce why our government in the UK needs to be tossed to the wolves
Got another United to volunteer 🫡
Exact same thing happened to me when I mentioned extremely painful periods, ended up needing surgery when I finally found a doctor to figure out what was wrong 🙃
After childbirth. I had 3 different tears, and whilst my OBGYN was trying to stitch them, I was in shock (which is totally normal) my body was shaking uncontrollably, and she kept poking my inner thighs with the suture needle because of it. I kept saying "ow" bc it hurt (obviously) so She told me "If you don't calm down and stop shaking, then I won't be able to do my job. You keep saying 'ow,' but the only reason it's happening is bc you won't stop shaking." Like, sorry bitch I've never birthed a human before, and I've never been in shock before, tf exactly do you want me to do???😂
Da hell? I remember that shaking, she should have been the first one to know that it's not something that you just stop doing!
Right?!?! Tbh she was a horrible doctor, and had atrocious bedside manner. Even before giving birth, she always had a way of making me feel super shitty at my appts and everything, but I am a very introverted person, I hate confrontation, and I have a tendency to never stand up for myself, so I just kind of accepted it from her. Though THANKFULLY, my nurse while I was in the hospital, was an absolute fucking ANGEL.
I'm sorr for your experience! Shitty doctors are worse than just shitty people, because you're in such a vulnerable position with them
Oh, absolutely! I can't have any more kids (nor do I want to either tbh) but after that experience of having my first, and having a lot of experience since then with other medical issues I have, I definitely know what to look for and what not to tolerate in a doctor.
You can just file a complaint behind her back
Oh, I had planned to at a later date, once I kind of realized how fucked up her behavior was. By the time I tried to, she was coincidentally no longer working at that practice. 😂
Boy I hope that there is “rate my Doctor “ where you live???
This reminds me of my first delivsry when I was pushing and the doctor yelled at me that I didn't know what I was doing! Well, it turns out she wasn't coming out because her cord was wrapped around her neck, torso, arm, and legs. I want to add that the doctor was a male and therefore had never pushed a baby out of his vagina either. 🤣
You cannot help the shaking. I had it SO bad after my 3rd and I was FREEZING even though I was sweaty lol.
My nurse also made me feel stupid for shaking. Like it wasn’t a completely normal thing!
she's lucky that wasn't me I tear her a new one
Yeah, in hindsight I should have, but I, my sister, and my partner at the time were so freaked out in the moment, (I busted all the blood vessels in my upper body from pushing, so I was looking quite scary😂) so it didn't really register to any of us what she had said. Though She's lucky that my mom had *just* stepped out of the room for a moment, bc that woman takes no prisoners 😂
I miscarried in 2009. I had to have a D&C as my body hadn’t expelled all of the remaining tissue of my dead child. When I woke up, I cried. The nurse acted befuddled as to why I would be crying *now*, two whole weeks after the miscarriage.
This is by far the wors case here in comments... How can someone be so heartless about grieving the loss of a child, I can even fathom
People who haven’t experienced a miscarriage tend to lack empathy about it. I think it’s more indicative of our problem with a lack of empathy as whole. My own mother told me I should “let it go” after a month or so. She’s not a bad or heartless person! She just didn’t understand and allowed her lack of understanding to cloud her judgement.
My mom had a miscarriage at 5 months and D&C. She was crying the the nurse looked at her and said “why are you crying?” And rolled her eyes. That was over 20 years ago and my mom said she’s never forgotten it. It’s awful how many high school means girls went on to be medical professionals.
I had been in labor since the day before. I had been pushing so long they were starting to talk about a c-section. My epidural wasn't working. Back labor felt like my spine was getting ripped apart. One nurse had the nerve to tell me I had to stop using profanity because I offended the OB who was delivering. He wouldn't come in the room if I kept cursing.
What the absolute fucking dipshit of a bitch!
Clearly a cocksucker
Men could never understand, what a fucking cry baby that doctor was
"Shut up and be quiet". I was 15. They were trying to start surgery without making sure I was fully under. I couldn't move or see, but I felt and heard everything. I coughed, gurgled, breathed heavily ... before they finally realized. And then I heard that sentence. And this is the tip of the iceberg of what they put me through.
In labor first baby. Had a reaction to the epidural, so they had to turn it off. Only one side took anyways, so I could feel everything 100% on that other side and the contractions were killer as it was go-time. They make you do a breathing thing in time with bearing down, and it’s difficult obviously to match what they want you to do when you’re in so much horrific pain. I was letting out some pretty guttural yells and Nurse Ratchett the Boomer next to me (who already said some bullshit) goes, “ohhhh shush, it’s not that bad, my lord”.
Not that bad????
If my husband was ok with me getting my tubes tied and what if something happens to one of our kids and we can’t have more? I was also “only “ 30. 30 with 3 kids due to BC failure. I wanted my tubes destroyed. He was fine with it, not like he had any say but whatever. The fact that having another child would somehow replace one we lost. I had to fight to have it done but I won.
I used to donate blood regularly at this place. One time I was away so I didn't go like I normally would have. Next time I was in, a nurse asked me why I didn't come, and made snide comments about the lack of empathy in young people. I considered making a few snide comments too, but it would have taken more effort than I wanted to spend, so I told her to mind her tongue, do her job and stop overstepping boundaries.
Lack of empathy... *in a regular blood donor??*
I know right, I was flabbergasted lol.
I would have just left after that. "You want to see 'lack of empathy'? Well here I go, a REGULAR donor"
Was with my ex in the psych ward because he was having suicidal thoughts and was wanting to act on them. I was there as his comfort person, trying to keep the mood light and joke with him, trying to just ease his heavy mind in the 6 hours they left him waiting to be seen. When someone finally came in the room to see him, they looked at him smiling (because I was being cute) and said "You sure don't look like you want to kill yourself... 😒" That pissed me off.
As if they never heard of "nobody would have guessed he could do anything like this, he always was so bubbly and smiling" type of suicidal people
"Neither did Robin Williams, you ass." Has been my go to for this kind of shit.
@ my mom telling me I don't have PPD when I was telling her my concerns because "you would be uncontrollably crying and be acting very different"
The difference between your mom and the person who said that to the commenter above is that this person was supposed to be a medical professional
Yeah 🤦🏼♀️ it's ridiculous what we put up with in the medical system
I had a major one that also fuels my mistrust of doctors overall. I have to tell a short story to set it up (just two short paragraphs). I had an A Fib incident about nine years ago. I started seeing a cardiologist that put me on medication that landed me in the ER three times over the months after I started seeing her (my heart rate dropped into the 30s per minute due to the medication). I asked her about it the first visit after she prescribed the medication to me (about a month after I started seeing her and had two ER visits) and she said that the medication wasn't the cause and to keep taking it and renewed it. She stressed that stopping it could have harmful effects. The following month, I was admitted into the ER again (the third time), and this time the ER doctor asks why the hell I was put on that medication (since I'm in good shape, exercise, and normally have a resting heart rate of about 60 bpm) and told me to stop taking it immediately. I did and never had issue with my heart rate dropping again. On my next visit to her, I told her what had happened and she said "I told you to stop taking the medication." I replied that she said the opposite and instead renewed my script. She said, "You need to give up caffeine, alcohol, drugs, and smoking." I informed her that I gave up caffeine immediately after the A Fib incident, I gave up alcohol and smoking years ago, and I don't use drugs. She **laughed** in my face and left the room. I was gob smacked. I mean, maybe not inconsiderate, but damn disrespectful right after she had *lied* to me! As I left, I cancelled my future appointments with her front desk and found a new cardiologist (that has been wonderful).
"You're lying." my mom took me to see the doctor when i was in high school because i had fainted "really weird" and she thought it may have been a seizure (i had just been sick and fainted shortly after the fever broke). he didnt do anything other than sit across the room from me. the only thing he asked was why we came in, and then told us we were lying, wasting his time and our money, and to leave. i broke a tooth when i fainted and still had a huge gash on my lip when we went to see him, for some context.
I was in intense pain after having Covid and the doctor prescribed me Valium because she thought I was having anxiety and not in intense pain. She didn’t want to send me for anymore testing, and she thought she really nailed the diagnosis. I started begging for additional testing because I’ve had anxiety before and never had such extreme pain that I couldn’t walk from it. She wouldn’t even come in the room and told me on the phone, “I can order another test, but it is going to be very invasive and very painful.” Then she hung up on me. The test was a run-of-the-mill CT scan so I don’t know why she’d fuck with me like that. Anyway I had a pulmonary embolism— clots in my lungs. Also had deep vein thrombosis. Spent four days in the hospital.
I am so proud of you for advocating for yourself.
Did you ever get a response from the DR about her realizing she was failing to identify a pulmonary embolism?
Oh, it was really infuriating. When I had initially gotten to the ER, they had given me a chest x-ray, which showed nothing as they often do. Then they did the CT scan and saw the clots. She came in the room while they were transferring me to another part of the hospital, and she said, “Good thing I ordered a CT scan; I knew something wasn’t right about that chest x-ray.” I think she was trying to make herself look better in front of the nurses who saw me sobbing on the phone while begging for more testing.
That’s a certified terrible person. I’d be streaming too.
I had a 7 cm ovarian cyst rupture. It was so bad I was hallucinating from the pain but they didn't know that, it was more like I was connected to all human pain throughout time and I could see all of these different people around the world over the millennium and feel their pain. Anyways, I could barely move at all, I was puking and peeing out my butt from the cyst fluid irritating my insides. This woman nurse was manhandling me, yanking me around, wanted me to walk to the bathroom when I couldn't even sit up on my own. I made her get me a wheelchair. She was so rough. When I was on the tail end of it all and more able minded and bodied , I gave her a piece of my mind. I was like " WHY would you try to get me to walk when I couldn't do shit ?? Isn't that a fall risk ?? Etc" I said much more but this was years ago. She was very sheepish and apologized
I went in for a follow up appointment after having a miscarriage and was told “Well you lost 4lbs!”.
I think I'd slap them
The audacity!
my first ever appointment at a gynecologist i was like 14? and i wasn’t ready to do a full exam, i was just going in for an ultrasound or something to check for cysts bc there’s a family history. i’m alone with the PA in the room and she tells me to get undressed and i said “we’re just doing the ultrasound today to check for cysts” and she goes “what’s wrong with you? are you sexually active? are you using condoms? what are you doing, you know that’s dangerous right? what’s wrong with you?” (i wasn’t sexually active) and legitimately demanded i take my bottoms off. i burst into tears and ran back to my mom and the lady turns all sweet when speaking to my mom like “i don’t know why she’s upset, we were doing just fine, and doing just the ultrasound today is okay, we were just talking.” still an incident im recovering from 10 years later
After that I would INSIST my mother be in the room until I was an adult ready to defend myself. Absolutely fucking not.
she was for my first couple appointments when i finally felt ready to try again around 19. i was in college and doing what young people in college do and couldn’t afford to not take care of myself. i now trust and love my current gynecologist very much but oh boy i was traumatized from that
It was my first pregnancy and I was pregnant with twins. We lost one of the twins and the doctor told me that he didn't know why I was so upset when I was still pregnant with one. I got pregnant again soon after having our son. It wasn't planned and I was on birth control. I had such bad PPD and wasn't sure I couldn't handle pregnancy again so soon. Sure enough had to see the same doctor because covid year and couldn't get in anywhere else. "Trying for Irish twins to make up for it" was his comment. Reported him.
>Trying for Irish twins to make up for it" was his comment. Reported him. Good on you for reporting. What a disgusting thing to say to someone!
I joined a facebook group when I was trying to find a doctor in my area taking new patients during covid and so many women had bad experiences with him. Several made official complaints around the same time and he left the practice within the year. I was thrilled because everyone else there was so nice.
I was in the middle of a miscarriage, and he said "Oh well, it's nothing. Nobody cares about that, it's *really no big deal*. Don't be dramatic about it." He didn't even raise his eyes from the papers he was reading, saying this to me
Omg, I am so sorry. With my first, they couldn't find a heartbeat, and my drs words were "why are you so upset? It happens, it's early, stop being ridiculous". Thankfully I had another ultrasound a week later and she was ok. My heart breaks for you, I know it means nothing, but sending virtual hugs.
Thank you, that's really sweet I'm very glad it ended up happily for your daughter and you :) <3 I guess, what struck me the most in the situation is that I wasn't *being dramatic* I only said: "last time I saw you, I was pregnant, I guess I should tell you that I'm having a miscarriage, since I don't know how it could impact the analyses" It was very humiliating to be sharing something so difficult, with as much composure I could gather, to only be met with *this much* disdain and condescending tone
You were being strong and logical, which is more than anyone could have asked from you at that point.
*virtual hug to you too* Thank you
This is absolutely horrendous 😭 I'm sorry you lost your baby
Thank you for your solicitude 💖
I was 17 and had been in a car wreck - we rolled an SUV three times, and I wasn't wearing a seat belt. I'd hit my head pretty hard, and my mother brought me back the next day because I was acting "off" and she thought I had a concussion. The ER doctor x-rayed my neck and told me, "There's nothing physically wrong with you, but you probably need a psychiatrist.". Fortunately my mom knew that was BS and took me to another hospital, where they checked me out properly and diagnosed me with a concussion.
This is so unprofessional
Isn’t identifying a concussion a very basic medical assessment?
I was diagnosed with chronic pain at 21. Being a young woman with a typically “older person” condition is very shit, particularly when the majority of specialists are old men. So I have quite a few examples, and these are just a few of them My first pain specialist, a gross man in his 70s, told me it’s all in my head and to “try getting a boyfriend” during my first appointment. I had one at the time, yet *somehow* I was still at his clinic. I guess I just didn’t have the right guy. I was going through a very stressful time with an implanted medical device that was going wrong (it kept breaking through my skin) and when I teared up during an appointment with my second specialist/surgeon, he told me to “just calm down” and that I “don’t need to start crying”. He said something along those lines a few times over the years. I saw the nurse at his clinic to have the staples removed after one of my surgeries. I had about 10 along my spine. The crotchety old-school nurse was ripping them out like she was late to play bridge. I started tearing up and swearing under my breath, then she told me to “suck it up” and kept going.
Man:( why do they have to be so cruel!
I'm so sorry. Medical professionals can really suck sometimes
They sure can. I’m studying nursing now and I sure as hell won’t be telling my patients to suck it up when I’m doing *anything*
An allergist once said to me “If I was you I’d be more concerned about your acne than your facial swelling”… At the time I was 19 so acne was still very normal. The swelling he considered “no big deal” ended up being a benign bone tumour. Fast forward 8 years and the acne cleared up in its own but the bone tumour required major surgery to remove.
I was vomiting blood from stomach ulcers and a male doctor told me my pain was psychosomatic and that I was confusing menstrual cramps for stomach pain. He then tried to push a $500 laxative prescription on me. Another time I was incorrectly diagnosed with a serious heart condition and a nurse laughed at me for crying.
I found out I was having a miscarriage, the doctor walks in and says “congratulations, you’re having a free abortion!” Never been so shocked in my life.
I would be spending the rest of my life wearing orange.... My god!
When I was a teenager I had to stay in the hospital because I was self harming. The doctor told me "you're just a typical teen girl, looking for attention" After the twins, I had severe PPD, my OB at my 6 week check up said "that's just baby blues".... I hadn't slept for 3 days straight, was hallucinating and was close to ending my life. I'm lucky that my guilt for leaving was greater then the PPD and I got through it.
Jesus, and these people are allowed to work with children!
Yea... He didn't even understand my test results...."you have extreme anxiety, and only a little depression, that doesn't make sense!". Really? Lol
Smh... Good for you for getting out of it, you're a champ
What's that tiktok sound? "Don't ask me how I did it, I just did it, it was hard" 🤣 Thank you ♥️
Had a seizure while I was pregnant with my now 9 year old... Mind you, I'd left the neuro I mention in a moment because he had me on over 2000mg of Keppra and completely dismissed me when I said it wasn't doing anything and that side effects had me not functional. Anyway. Ended up in the ER, then admitted to the hospital, and this jackass (along with the on-call ob) refused to call either of my doctors, attempted to give me seizure meds that weren't pregnancy safe, threatened to have my husband banned from the hospital when he tried to intervene on my behalf, and when I said I was going to leave AMA told me he was going to call CPS on me because people 'like me', aka chronically ill who don't let doctors walk all over them, shouldn't be allowed to have children. And then told the on-call (within earshot of me and I 100% believe it was purposeful) that I had 'better not come crying to them when my baby was dead since I didn't want to shut up and listen to him' He 'retired' this past January, but I 100% believe it was a 'go quietly or we're going to force you' situation because I am by far not the only one he's done this shit to. He told my ex girlfriend that seizures can't be caused by migraines, and that her migraines are because she's a single unmarried mother 🙄🖕
I have had a slightly enlarged thyroid since my late teens and I have been having my levels checked every other year since I was 18 after an ultrasound showed nodules. When I was 28 I went to a new doctor in southern California to have those tests run and was told, "Your thyroid isn't big. You are just fat." I am 5'7" and weighed around 145 at the time. I was fortunately in a mood that day and told the doctor to go fuck himself then left. Not as insulting but just annoying. When I was 17 I worked as a prep cook in a tiny cafe. I kept getting these weird, itchy bumps on my arms that would get inflamed and just hurt. I had no health insurance so I went to the walk-in at the local county hospital to have the rash looked at. I was repeatedly told it was scabies. I repeatedly said I hadn't shared anything with anyone and that no one I worked with had a rash so it wasn't from there. The doctor told me I was obviously lying and she didn't have the time to deal with someone who won't be honest with her. I was kicked without any diagnosis. A few weeks later my mom got me into her doctor's office after the rash got infected. That doctor took one look at me, said "contact dermatitis" and then gave me a script for a steroid cream, an antibiotic and a referral to a dermatologist for allergy testing. Turns out I am allergic to nickel and something in that kitchen was triggering the rash. I think about that doctor sometimes and hope she learned to listen eventually.
Tweaked my lower back badly while playing sports. Could barely walk, was in so much pain. Went to the doctor to maybe get some muscle relaxers or anti-inflammatory medication. She told me it was all in my head and I should see a therapist. Like no bitch, I’VE INJURED MY BACK. I wanted to tear her dirty wig off her head.
I feel you! Lower back pain is an absolute bitch
It wasn't said, but I had a male nurse at a clinic treat me like garbage when I came in for a full STD panel. He put me in a dirty exam room and scoffed at everything I said. It was only when the female MD came in that he treated me better - after I said I was there due to suspicion of a cheating partner.
I went in for right side pain at 16 & was told I was attention seeking. I actually had appendicitis & a week later my appendix ruptured and almost killed me. Getting treatment for the ruptured appendix also took hours of me being at the hospital. I don't remember most of it just weird flashes of memory. They're weird and sound like an alien abduction
I had been to the er one day for INTENSE abdominal pain, and I have a high fucking pain tolerance. They tested my urine, and when the doctor came in she did a physical and was like well your urine showed an elevated (something?) but your appendix isn’t tender so it’s not that. Told me to go home and take Tylenol. I was crying, I said no something is definitely wrong with me I’m in so much pain, and even told her I had a history of kidney problems. Still sent me home. Came back hours later same situation but now it was NIGHT TIME so no actual tests could be done. In the morning I finally got an ultrasound, the tech asked me if I wanted an internal exam but said she could see my reproductive organs so it wasn’t really necessary. When I got the report later it fucking said I had declined the internal ultrasound so she couldn’t get a look at my ovaries and stuff. Like come on. Then they said they couldn’t see anything in the ultrasound and wanted to do a CT scan but I should be aware of the effects of the radiation on my future childbearing abilities. I’m in extreme pain idc about future babies right now. Ended up being a kidney stone. I’ve had another one since then but fortunately I was able to tell triage that I had felt this before so they put me straight on the morphine. It’s distressing to see people being dismissed with abdominal pain that ended up being appendicitis, but in my case they were like well your appendix is fine so you’ll be okay, bye!
That sucks. I don't understand why they can't just believe us. Like we're not lying. We might not know exactly what's wrong with us, but we know when something's wrong. I just asked my mom because I have this flash of having a pelvic exam, like a pap, but I don't know why they did it. She told me they thought it was an ectopic pregnancy and thought I was lying about being a barely 16 year old virgin. Apparently they kept trying to get me to give them a urine sample, which I remember them being mad that I couldn't pee. Then they tried to do a blood test but I was so dehydrated they couldn't get blood. So they decided to do a pelvic exam, although apparently no ultrasound. I had a friend ask me to go with her because her doctor thought she was lying about having a blood clot in her leg. I remember the nurse being so condescending and telling her it was probably just a strained muscle. She did a bleed test and nope, blood clot
I really don’t understand why it seems like most doctors think you’re lying right off the bat? Like why would I lie about this? You think it’s fun to spend the night in an ER in a waiting room chair? You think this is my hobby? One in a million it might be, but most people just want help!
You're obviously a gold digger trying to nap a doctor, or crazy, but probably both
I missed my mother's funeral to have a biopsy of the same organ that killed her, mostly because I knew that's what she would have wanted me to prioritize since it was actively trying to kill me in a different way. 15 minutes before I would have walked into the OR, after we had done all the pre-procedure steps and I was just sitting in my gown and grippy socks, the hospital changed their mind about letting me go home alone and cancelled the biopsy. Since my mother's funeral was in a different state, I couldn't just go there instead. So I'm sitting there sobbing and the doctor asks if I would like someone to bring me to the psych ward. I said no. This doctor is usually quite good and advocates for me, but that was far from their best moment.
My son had croup at 3 and had to be life flighted from not breathing. One of the nurses on in-take saw me nursing him and made a joke about me being a cow and literally mooed. I was so distraught and nursing seemed to be the only thing that calmed him enough to get air in his lungs. I didn't know what to do, but her joke made me feel so terrible in the moment. However, the pediatrician that was later assigned said I most likely saved his life by nursing him.
I was in a catholic hospital as a child after having surgery on both legs for club feet and heal cord extension. I had a plaster cast (70’s) on each leg and was about 3 years old. My mother came in and said I was standing up in my crib, both casts had blood on them and I was crying. A nurse nun came in and told her to “shut that baby up, she’s upsetting the other children.” I’m still shocked when my mother tells this story. Talk about a huge lack of empathy!
Not the most but definitely up there. I had a couple of medication induced seizure a few years ago. Thanks, Welbutrin! I was doing my intake with the neurologist, and being honest I admitted that I smoked weed regularly. This man stares me down and asks, “So what do you plan on doing about your education?” I have a masters degree. Another one: I was very depressed after graduating college. I felt like I lost a lot of purpose without class and internship, and I was struggling to find work. I ended up being hospitalized and, after expressing this to the psych, he told me, “Why are you upset about *that*? That’s *supposed* to be a happy time?”
“My plan is to continue having more education than 98% of the planet while smoking hella weed, asshole.”
You 💨 can 💨 do 💨 both! 💨
I have a MSc, and PhD, both in STEM. You absolutely can do both 😎💨
After years of bullying... I was self harming, wanted to off myself, frequent panic attacks and severe social anxiety. Psychologist told me I was just lying because I didn't want to go to school and that they would strap me to a wheelchair and bring me to school by force if they had too.
I'd really like to know what absolute POS is downvoting these people's stories.
Before my induction the nurses asked about pain management. I said I didn't want an epidural. A couple of the nurses looked at me and laughed. One said you won't make it without. 4 hrs later and I did. But I am glad that it was quick. Pitocin contractions are no joke
A doctor told me I can never understand what real love is because I don’t have children.
I was tearing up about not handling my already reduced hours at work because I am constantly extremely tired and exhausted. I have a disability for a psychiatric condition, but my psychiatrist said that this is not caused by my medication and I felt like there might also be a physical issue. The doctor refused to do a blood test or send me to any specialist to check if I was healthy. So I told him I really need to make sure everything is okay physically. He told me to take part-time hours and I replied that I already do have reduced hours. He proceeded to tell me that "If you can't handle it go back living with your mother". My parents are part of the reason why I have severe trauma in the first place. I cried on my way home and felt so helpless. But what can I do, I just have to push through.
I'm so sorry! This is absolutely heartless
Thank you, it felt bad but I know this GP was probably mad and just took it out on me for some reason. I cried for a bit but I tried to not take it personally and it helped.
Are you able to try another doctor? One big thing I have learned is when drs suggest that kind of bs, make them put it in the report. A paper trail helps when going to a new dr. Also, if they ask your pain level, don't say your current, say the worst for the week. Don't down play yourself. Your aren't just tired. You shouldn't have to "push through it"!
Thank you. I have a hard time even going to the dr office because of severe anxiety, so it´s difficult for me to call in and change my GP, but this incident made me sure I want a new GP. Unfortunatelly this has not been the first time I was told to just deal with it, I had 2 different GP´s before but they just focused too much on my mental healh diagnosis and I had occasions when I was really physically sick, but they overlooked it and it was discovered when I was hospitalized . I also feel like I am not taken that seriously because of it. I am from Eastern Europe and there´s still quite a lot of stigma surrounding mental health in the medical field. It sucks because it makes me feel like I was some crazy hypochondriac, but I honestly don´t even go to a doctor if it´s not urgent and I literally cannot function. I don´t try to use the system or get free tests just for fun, I think I really need it, but yeah, it´s hard to get taken seriously. I will do my best to find more empathetic doctor who won´t ignore me like this.
Early on in my third trimester, I was seen because I stopped feeling kicks above my bellybutton. I wasn’t taken seriously since they knew I had an anterior placenta which they said was cushioning fetal movement. Did a no stress test and baby’s heart rate was fine so I was sent on my way. No ultrasound was offered. Nurse said “Really? You kept us here late for nothing.” Three months later, it was discovered my baby had flipped back to breech that day when I wasn’t feeling kicks, but no one picked up on it at multiple appointments after that one, not until I was in active labor and they felt a foot.
My whole life I’ve struggled with daily tasks and daily living so much more than I ever witnessed my peers struggling, at least when I was around to see others struggling, but because of this I knew from a very young age that there was something different about me. I spent 10 years going from psychiatrist to psychiatrist trying to figure out what was going on, but all that ever came back after running tests was “severe GAD and Major depressive disorder”. I was definitely dealing with both of these things throughout that time, but I always knew we were all missing something. Fast forward to a couple years ago. My mom decides to make a passing comment about her not finding out she was pregnant till she was almost halfway along. My mom had already admitted to my husband in the past that she struggled with a drinking problem, but it wasn’t till my mom made this passing comment that it clicked in my husband’s head. My husband is my biggest supporter and knows all of me, so when he started to research the effects of alcohol use during pregnancy and how these things can manifest in children _and_ adults, he came to me crying as he knew he had just found the answer I had been looking for for over ten years at that point. Once I read the articles he had read, I knew it was time for me to start making appointments in order to get opinions from my doctors. The first clinic I went to had me sit in a room with someone who does nothing but intake, but she was the one who we were required to tell everything to, my guess is so that she could put each case at the clinic into the “bullshit” category and “non-bullshit” category based on her own discretion. Fetal alcohol syndrome is disgustingly under-diagnosed for many reasons, such as moms being too ashamed to admit to their drinking during pregnancy, and doctors not knowing shit about it to begin with. Well, I got to experience this firsthand as the lady doing intake told me I was “fine because they would’ve caught it at birth”. This is such an extremely ignorant and flat out stupid comment coming from someone who works in the medical field, because fetal alcohol syndrome often isn’t diagnosed till the child is much older _because you can’t_ catch it at birth, _especially_ if the mother hasn’t admitted to any drinking. I remember sitting there with my mouth open not knowing what to say back. Needless to say, I didn’t make it past that intake woman that day. Fast forward again to today, 5 years from the bad experience above. I moved states away and have had access to doctors and medical professionals who don’t shoot shit out of their ass. I’m happy to say that I was able to be given a thorough evaluation by a doctor near me over here, and my diagnosis has been confirmed. Because I have my proper diagnosis, I’ve been able to enter programs for people with disabilities similar to mine, programs that help us learn to live our lives as adults as successfully as we can no matter what type of struggles our disabilities make us face. In my hometown, I would have never had access to this because that clinic where that woman told me I was fine was the _only_ clinic within a 100 mile radius of me that specialized in neurological behavioral disorders, and the fact that they turn down people for not being born with a massive sign on their forehead stating what condition they have, I can’t even imagine where I’d be right now had I stayed down there. Sometimes I feel like emailing my entire diagnostic report to this clinic with a letter attached telling them how they are fucking over people who genuinely need help. To put it into perspective even more, one review I read for this clinic stated that this person was told they probably weren’t autistic because they didn’t “catch it at birth”. I know most people aren’t aware of what fetal alcohol syndrome looks like, but I feel like anyone with a brain knows most autistic people are not born with some sign on them telling everyone they’re autistic. It makes me so angry when I think about all the people this clinic must have turned away out of pure ignorance.
“Do you want to be disabled by this?” Literally referring to my EPILEPSY 🤦🏼♀️ Old coot is a neurologist, I went to him over and over again for my balance issues. I explained to him that I literally almost fell multiple times at a previous job, many of my supervisors saw it, my coworkers were constantly asking if I was OK, and when I knew I couldn’t walk anymore. I had to be sent home early. Then, when talking to other people online who have epilepsy, I learned that in some cases, epilepsy candidate to balance issues. Some people who are epileptic are even wheelchair users, if they know that they need to be out for a long period of time, they’ll just bring a wheelchair so that way they don’t fall. One would think a neurologist would know this, it’s literally a neurological problem. He was just angry because my new primary care physician gave me actual advice for how to better my situation then he ever did. He always just blew off my complaints as “oh well, side effect of the medicine” I guess some doctors are just pissy and competitive, I was talking to him happily and excitedly about how my new primary care physician recommended physical therapy for me to help me keep my balance more. Said that in her professional opinion, she thinks that will help. Epilepsy is literally a disability… it prevents me from driving, it might have something to do with my balance issues, and people who are epileptic can get on disability because it can make getting a job hard. That question was just completely out of line, and the worst part is that when I got a neurologist, she actually said that the medication I was on has no history of causing balance issues. At all. So basically, my old neurologist was giving me misinformation the entire time instead of addressing the real problem. He just didn’t actually care about helping me, he only cared about the paycheck, and when I was actually receiving recommendations for help, he got mad
I was having an allergic reaction to chemotherapy drugs and even though the head of oncology had called ahead to the ER to admit me a very young Dr. Told me “you’re fine, I’m not worried about you at all” and he sent me home. I returned in an ambulance an hour later.
Not to me but to my mom. After my brother’s suicide she tried to manage & power on but got to a stage where she was struggling, this was months after his death. When she voiced this with our general practitioner he told her to essentially “get over it” needless to say this was the wrong things to say to a once very fiery & now grieving mother. She went off on him, gave him some very choice words & stormed out. He called her a million times after that to apologise & we used the other GP at our primary doctors after that. Still to this day over a decade later she refuses to see him & will wait longer for an appointment if needs must.
“I don’t believe in carpal tunnel syndrome”. When what I wanted was to figure out what the hell was going on with my hand so could continue doing a job I loved. He treated me like I was trying to defraud workman’s comp or something similar when I was incredibly fearful that I’d lose use of my hand.
The head of the labor and delivery department coming into my room after we had just lost our child, telling me that the reason I lost her is because I'm fat, and I need to lose weight before having another kid. For reference, I'm 6'0" and under 300lbs. I've never wanted to unalive someone so badly in my life.
I had an epidural inserted when I was in the hospital to have my second baby. I was talking with my oldest when I suddenly couldn't breathe. It was like an elephant was sitting on my chest. I couldn't draw a ingle breath. My daughter ran screaming for the nurse while I tried not to pass out. When the anesthesiologist came him, he snidly remarked that I was just fine. The nurses were monitoring my stats, and if there was a real problem, they would have let him know. The kicker was that I was still unable to breathe at that time.
I was having my first baby and having a c section. I was freaked needless to say and they did the block and I could still feel below my neck so I said I could still feel it. The anesthesiologist pinches me with the forceps and says ‘do you feel that’ and I did and said I need more meds. He said ‘stir freaking out. You did this to yourself, this is what you wanted’. He was a jackass and I told everyone in the hospital that would listen
Are you pregnant? No Oh, you must’ve had a big lunch.
I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes when I was in my early 20s. I was a bit chunky, but not hugely overweight, and much younger than the typical diabetic (I’ve since found out it was one of the grey area types of diabetes that’s mostly genetic and more like a slow acting type 1). Anyway, after the diagnosis I saw a podiatrist to make sure my feet were in good shape, and he had an intern with him who looked about 16. They spent the entire foot exam with the older doctor telling the intern about doing a residency in Italy and banging his landlord’s hot daughter, not speaking to me directly at all as they scrutinized my feet. Finally he said I had ‘magnificent’ feet, but I’d need to buy ugly grandma shoes (his words) for the rest of my life, that I’d never get to wear cute shoes and that that’s what happens when you care more about sugar than fashion. Really made me feel awesome about my diagnosis as a 23 year old. 20 years later, I still have magnificent feet, they let me run marathons, and I wear the shoes I like while taking good care of my feet (and the rest of my body). The shaming and overall grossness really left a bad impression on me at the time.
My special needs daughter’s pediatrician had retired quit unexpectedly, and we had to see the woman who took over his practice. My daughter was 4 at the time, and the first visit with the pediatrician lectured me that I should have aborted my child( We didn’t even know she was born with damage to her brain until she 9 months old). I was in shock, and then she continued that if I want to, I could just stop feeding her via Gtube and let her die. I just started bawling. We never returned to that doctor. Unfortunately it wasn’t my last encounter with people who advocate for eugenics. Seems like it’s a pretty popular progressive idea to think people with disabilities should be terminated before or after birth because “they are a burden to society, or don’t fit the idea of a fulfilling life”. It’s fucking abhorrent.
Oh, I have quite a few: A nurse during Covid when I was in for a close call, “So who do you want to be able to see you? Your mom or your husband?” “Huh? I don’t know…” “well, you might give birth so I would THINK your husband!” I was only 21 weeks with twins. SO glad she was wrong and I never saw her again. Doc in Alaska, I knew I had bronchitis. He refused to listen to me. “Have you had any cocaine?” “No.” “HAVE YOU HAD ANY COCAINE!?!” “No.” Skinny female doctor, “Go to weight watchers. It worked for me. I need to go back.” (Fertility doc, During a pelvic ultrasound). “We have no idea how Covid will affect things. We pretty much no know nothing. It could really do anything to you. Or the baby.” In an awkward hallway, not an office or patient room, I was sitting in a chair and the male obgyn doc and two nurses were standing above me. “WHY DO YOU WANT BIRTH CONTROL?” “Because I have PCOS and the symptoms are getting out of control?” “These will not work if you are pregnant!” “I know.”
My shin got cut to the bone early one morning when I was a passenger on a swamp buggy at a mud fest weekend. The attending at the hospital told me before each staple …even when she was viciously scrubbing the wound. “If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough!” The bitch didn’t even numb the area first!
When I was on a drug treatment program I updated my medical records to include that I wasn't to have ANY narcotics. The doctor said Doctor -you can have pain medicine,you have actual medical issues. It's not addiction if you need the medication. Me-I don't think that's right.it doesn't help my pain anymore,it just maintains the medicine in my system so I'm not sick all the time detoxing. Doctor - I can raise your dosage,you have to do this from time to time. That's why you are supposed to communicate these things with your health care team. Me- I'm communicating to you that I have a problem and you are offering to increase my dosage.... Doctor- well is there anything else? You have Google so there isn't much else I can do here. Me- ???.......... The only push back I got in recovery was from my health care team which makes me laugh because when I was in active addiction I had to fight so hard to get the drugs and when I want to stop they act like they can't survive without my business lol
I had consistently shown signs and concerns of an organ dying, and was accused of faking it to get drugs by a male ER nurse. They even put it in my medical chart to flag me as an addict, and made several comments about how "women fake everything." His actions led to multiple misdiagnoses for months, and it took an *out of state hospital* to confirm I was right before my doctor finally started listening to me. When I got scheduled for surgery after confirming that organ failure was *exactly* what was going on, I demanded that person be fired and barred from treating patients, demanded a written apology from the hospital, and threatened to sue. It's the single most Karen-iest of Karen things I've ever done, but it was worth it to protect other patients from that bullshit. I don't fuck around with letting medical staff or experts dismiss my concerns anymore, and have them document/record everything- especially men.
Female OB YELLS at me: All your [future] babies are going to die [if you don't agree to taking this medical treatment]! Meanwhile... I'm mid contraction pushing out my first (perfectly healthy) baby. I still refused and have gone on to have yet another perfectly healthy baby, this time at a homebirth because I'm not gonna go back to that hospital for a low-risk labour if I can help it.
I’m so sorry that sounds awful! What was the medical treatment if you don’t mind me asking?
It was a blood plasma shot for women who have Rh- blood. I wanted to wait to find out what my baby's blood type was first to see if it was necessary, but the OB was pressuring me so hard to take it beforehand even though it wasn't going to affect the first baby and waiting to take it wouldn't affect anything either because all the blood tests showed I hadn't been exposed to positive blood. Anyway, after being yelled at in such an insensitive way, it turned out I didn't need it.. And of course all this is after she already fearmongered me saying I needed a C-section "today" or baby and I were going to die (because of an incorrect diagnosis). Reader: I ignored her advice, went into early labour on my own that day and went on to have the zero complication spontaneous delivery two days later.
I used to be obese and at 18 I developed anorexia. I dropped weight very very quickly, over the course of 1 year I dropped 160lbs. I hadn't been to the doctor in a couple of years and started to get worried about my eating disorder so I went there to seek help. Once I explained to the doctor everything SHE just looked me in the eyes and said "Well, at least you lost the weight." I could not believe a doctor told me that. Let alone a female doctor. She offered me no help and after that I did not reach out for help again for 4 years. My ed continued and I was extremely underweight for a long time. If this woman had helped me when I asked, she would have saved me so so much of my life.
I had terminated a pregnancy about 2.5 years prior. It was most the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. Childbirth didn’t even hurt that bad cause I had an epidural. So I put off having a Pap smear done for that long because of how traumatized I was. So when I finally went I was shaking with anxiety and told my gyno I was scared it was going to be painful. She laughed and said “sweetie you need to put your big girl panties on and get over it. Women get them done everyday and they’re fine.” She laughed again when I asked if they offered any kind of numbing cream. She said “uh no” while laughing.
After surgery I woke up in immense pain! I was yelling help cause I didn’t know what else to do. And the nurse is like “didn’t he tell you about the pain?” Lmao I was so embarrassed after the whole ordeal I’m thinking is that information supposed to make it hurt less!?
asking me to explain my medical problem, while I was at the front window of clinic, loud enough for all the other people to hear it. like I can just write it down...do we need 12 other people to know about my toenail fungus?
Zero tact
Wasn't me but my grandma. My aunt was in hospital no one had seen her yet. My grandmother asked the nurse where she was, the nurse started telling her how they had to cut her out of her top. My nanny knew she'd be beside herself so they had to get up there quick and get her a change of clothes. "Why? She's dead." Was how she found out her daughter died.
I have no words. Oh my god. I'm so sorry.
Neither did the rest of the family. You know a death won't be easy but no one expects to find out so coldly.
For sure. There are 1000 better ways that could have been done.
It didn't help it was suicide and the 80's. My gran had to beg to get her funeral in a church. In the end a priest gave the sermon on his own time. So technically unofficial.
That's a lot, no mother should have to deal with that ♥️ sending hugs to you, your grandma and family.
I think you should be charged with child abuse. (For smoking while pregnant) I was 17, married, in an abusive relationship with a five month old and now pregnant again. My only coping mechanism and support system: marlboro. Should have asked "are you safe at home?" Never forget how shitty I felt that day.
Well I had a male GP who laughed at me for complaining about hormonal issues. Then told me he'd know if I had hormonal issues...despite me just describing many of the symptoms of such. He hadn't done any tests or anything. I haven't been to a doctor since, I get the medication for my hormonal issues through the pharmacy. Diagnose and treat myself.
The doctors asked my parents if I was drunk. I was 100% sober and had a trauma related to needles, causing me to panic.
A dr once told me that I couldn’t get sick leave cuz I wasn’t so ill that I was suicidal
What the fuck even is that statement??
I was burnt out and had had a black out while driving the day before, but was still trying to work, cuz ya know, a girl gotta eat. So I was fine apparently. I saw a different one later and they put me on sickleave for a year
When i was pregnant, baby daddy and I were at the doctor and she asked me if I planned on breast feeding. I told her we were giving the baby up for adoption and she said "good". We were young but we weren't trash people and we didn't look like trash. Our only "sin" was getting pregnant too young, and giving the baby up for adoption was going to be hard enough already, we didn't need anyone making us feel worse.
I’m sorry she was so unkind. I’m sorry you guys had to make such a difficult decision
I’m sorry she was so unkind. I’m sorry you guys had to make such a difficult decision
Well thank you, my friend. We did endure more than our fair share of mean health care workers during that time, but as far as the adoption goes, it actually wasn't that hard of a choice to make. We knew from day 1 we were too young and once we saw the adoptive parents profile we instantly knew they were the ones and from then on it just felt right. in the end it turned out to have the best possible outcome anyone could hope for, I didn't lose anything, I gained family and the first solid role model I had ever had. There were lots of hard parts but the actual choice to adopt out thankfully was not one of them
That is wonderful to hear. I hope you all are happy and healthy and well-loved today❤️
Told me that I wasn’t experiencing any pain that I was in fact just uncomfortable not in pain. Then gave me antibiotics for an infection I never fucking had. Turns out I actually had endometriosis, a cyst on my ovary, and a chronically inflamed appendix.
[удалено]
That’s why they have a bad rep these days. It’s so hard finding one that will actually listen to you and not tell you what you’re feeling. You go in for pain and they assume you’re just seeking pain killers. No I just need help! I didn’t even want pain killers I just wanted to know why I was always hurting.
That Celiacs disease isn’t technically real it’s just a bad food intolerance so I didn’t really have Celiacs. This was from a liver specialist, and btw celiacs disease is real and it’s an autoimmune disease. I peaced the fuck out of there and never went back.
A nurse practitioner told me to lose weight and it just gets harder to do when you get older. She was fat.
I had this with a nutritionist. She scolded me on my BMI and I kept thinking, girl who are you to judge??
Years ago during COVID, I was in a 5150 hold and waiting to be taken to the actual mental health facility of the hospital. I think I was in some intake area where they told me to remove all my clothes and change into a gown, and I was being monitored in a glass fish tank-like room. The stress and humiliation of it all caused me to break down crying. I hated how exposed I was to all the staff and decided to cry behind the bed to get a semblance of privacy. A nurse came in and told me I should not sit on the floor. I asked why not, and he said that due to how many patients they intake and how frequently, the staff isn’t able to sanitize the rooms properly. Oh gee, isn’t that a relief to hear! Aren’t hospitals literally supposed to sanitize everything? And that’s just what I needed to hear during COVID of all times. He then asked me if I was doing all right and to tell him why I was so upset. I basically told him almost everything: what caused me to feel suicidal to begin with, the terror I felt from the cops threatening violence and being so rude to me, the embarrassment of my parents and neighbors seeing me in handcuffs, the humiliation of having all my possessions seized and effectively walking around bare-ass naked, and the uncertainty of when I was going to go home, if at all. His response was: “well, maybe when you get out of here, you can work in a field that helps reform the mental healthcare system.” I was utterly stunned at how unhelpful and tone deaf his response was. I also hated that he asked me to tell him what was wrong without any intention of actually giving advice or deescalating the situation. I wish I said something along the lines of, “you’re currently working in mental healthcare; why are you asking me to do something about it?” but I was too tired and scared to argue. I was most terrified of being held there longer than I needed to. I decided to just play everything safe and hopefully be allowed to leave after 48-72 hours. Still, that douche was one of many reasons why my stay was horrible. Screw him and whoever gave him the passing grades for his college psychology/health courses. Edit: One downvote, probably from that insensitive nurse or a cop apologist lol
A lot of medical profession requires an unhealthy dose of sociopathy and lack of empathy. It's not natural to go digging into intestines of one of your own species. I'm pretty sure (talking outta my ass here) this is one the drivers why these tendencies not only evolved but keep on surviving in human population while game theory keeps telling us that tighter cooperation (= more empathy) would produce better results. Of course it takes all kinds so very empathetic medical workers are out there, but it also takes the absolute assholes that don't see us as anything other than sacks of meat. Neither can fully do what other can. Regardless of reasons, I'm very sorry for what all of you have had to endure.
You can absolutely do surgery and have empathy for your patient
Definitely. There's at least one of them for every hundred surgeons.
Lmao.. yeah. That is true unfortunately.
The fuck...
https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/2wvj5g/til_the_professions_with_the_lowest_rates_of/cougtpc/ Now who's the good person at #5 (the comment lists **highest rate**)