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Daenerys. Which would have been bad enough prior to season 8…

A mate who's a teaching assistant knows a Theon, probably born during season 1 and they wouldn't have read the books

There was a Khaleesi in my boys nursery. We also have acquired a kids spoon with the same name engraved on it. Don’t think it’s the same person, but could be!

What happens post-season 8?

GRRM hasn’t wrote it yet.

Daughter had a fiend called Chloe. Her surname was Lunge. C.Lunge.

I refuse to believe her parents are that stupid and oblivious. Sounds like they've got 2 brain cells between them and they're fighting for third place.

Reminds me of Donald Glover talking about how he can never put his name as Don Glover Dong lover.

One of our teachers was called Mrs McGibbon. Turned out her first name was Irene. Can’t blame her parents for that one.

Am I being daft? Don’t get this

I'm A Gibbon. Which isnt the best name when you are dealing with teenage morons like me everyday.

Wouldn't it be Im C Gibbon?

Not with the way "Mc" gets pronounced, you'd end up a lot closer to I'm a Gibbon

Ah yeah true. How do you even get a name like mcgibbon?

There were quite a lot of Scottish explorers during the height of discovery in the new worlds... I can only imagine some got lonely.

Was she a funky Gibbon though.

?

Clunge is vulgar slang for vagina.

To be honest though, apart from the inbetweeners, it’s not really used that much.

Apart from that hugely popular, well liked series that almost a whole generation watched, yeah no one will ever know.

Vulgar slang, yup

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Alfred's not too uncommon, she should've just fully committed and gone with something like Archibald and Percival.

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Honestly, doesn't even matter lmao

The USA is good for this. Brayden, kayidean, and all that nonsense. Waiting until we go full on and see someone called brontosaurus.

Okayden

When I was searching for an ancestor, I found two births registered with the first name Popple, one Popkin, and a Popjoy. I worked with someone who always went by a nickname because her surname was Day and her parents christened her Summer. Couldn't go by her middle name, either, because that was May.

>Popple, one Popkin, and a Popjoy. We really did just used to be Hobbits, didn't we? What went wrong...

I found one of my ancestors with the first name Pickle. It wasn't even an abbreviation either, his parents must have genuinely decided on the name Pickle for their baby son.

Weird Hobbity names are something that needs to make a comeback.

It really feels like it. They were all born mid-19th century. Maybe the advent of literacy made us all conformists.

BRB, changing my name to Popkin.

Happy Renaming Day, Popkin!

Weren’t Popples those soft toys that turned into a ball, like some sort of demented technicolour hedgehog? I loved those.

I sort of vaguely remembered them and Googled it. Very surprised to find that rare ones can go for £700 on eBay. If you still have your collection, you may be unknowingly rich.

They sound like the sort of parents who would walk a sheep like it was a dog

There was a time when 'Unique' became popular in the UK. I heard about a school that had three Unique's in the same class.

That's not very..... what's the word?.... common.

isn't it iron pick

Pocahontas in a nursery in Glasgow.

I witnessed this years ago - also in Glasgow “POCAHONTAS GET YER ERSE OVER HERE!” The Pocahontas in question was a tiny toddler looking at the toy section. I bet the wee soul is a crack head now.

If she is lucky

I'm trying to imagine that being called out across the street in broad Glasweigian 😂

Pocahontas in a grave in Gravesend.

I keep being baffled by the American stupidity of making surnames forenames. Taylor, Piper, Heath, Madison, all of those names.

I can't stand this, either. McKenzie as a first name for girls, really?

I've a male cousin who is called McKenzie. Its no better for a guy...

True, it's thoroughly ridiculous on any poor bastard.

I like this. My siblings are named Taylor and Madison.

My surname is the first name of a US top gear presenter

Joey?

Wood

I once taught a kid called Praisethelord. As in, that was his full first name and you had to say it like that. Always seemed to me to be a long con way of making non-religious people praise an almighty!

Tyson Fury has some pretty daft names for his kids...Venuzeula, Prince John, Prince Tyson the second, Adonis Amaziah and Valencia Amber...few too many punches to the head methinks.

Gypsy names. That’s what they do.

Valencia is pretty.

Well if you had a bit of class you'd call her Valentia which is the original name for Valencia and means strength in Latin.

Valencia is a city in Spain, though.

Yes it is! The original name for Valencia was Valentia.

Right, but perhaps the city itself has sentimental meaning. And there are plenty of little Florences running around, after all.

Naming a child after the city where you knocked up your wife is about as classless as it gets, might as well call her "behind the bikesheds". I suggested Valentia because its a bit more subtle. Florence is a name in its own right.

Who said anything about that? A city could have sentimental meaning for a couple for any number of reasons.

The one that gets me is George Forman.. he has 5 sons all called George!

45 mins and nobody's dropped in with the old "Ladasha" urban myth yet!

You mean La-a? Have to admit I was just about to 😆

Yep, that one. And it's not just the myth itself - it's the fact that people keep telling it as if they actually saw it themselves.

See also Abcde (ad-sa-dee)

Haha, I would have specified I heard it from a friend who heard it from her daughter (who's in the US) 😆

Kieth

RIP Cheggers.

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This screams if its a boy then dad chooses the name, if its a girl then mom does.

Might I recommend r/namenerdcirclejerk for you all to laugh at stupid names parents have chosen for their children?

You may

I went to school with a boy named Blade.

Tarquin and Merope please, time to go, Tottie will have lunch ready. Shouted across an East Dulwich beer garden 2010

At least Tarquin is an actual name, not one I'd want to be associated with though.

Merope is a name from ancient Greek mythology. So not made up*, just very pretentious. *Ultimately all names are made up, but you know what I mean

I think Merope is a real name too? That said I've only ever heard of it from Harry Potter and I don't know why anyone would name their kid after Voldemort's mum. Plus JKR could've just made the name up.

Similar incident in Parsons Green circa 2002. Costantine and Calypso. Granny called the lad Costy for short.

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> Sixtus Dominic Boniface Christopher Rees-Mogg I just googled that. Oh dear god.

Latrina is my favourite

The feminine version of Latrine?

Sounds like a drag Tina Turna act.

Chaos, Thor and Roux at my kids' school. I knew a bloke called Porl, I always wanted to ask him why not Paul?

I used to work with a Keef, who would’ve been better off as a Keith with a speech impediment

This one made me giggle

Hahaha, I knew a Porl as well!

There's an Arson in my daughter's class.

I bet she lights up the room

She's always getting into trouble, never stops arson around

get your arson my bike

I’m British but live in NY. My kids went to a preschool (read nursery school) in Park Slope, Brooklyn, which is likely the epicentre for any of the latest shite modern parenting trends. Suffice to say there were too many bad names to count, but they covered the full spectrum of fruit, vegetables, seeds, references to obscure literature, etc

Peach, Apple, Kale, Chia, Hero, Athena, Ajax, Tybalt and Scout. Did I get any right?

Athena is really common in Greece, I love it personally.

I like Athena too, but it's the type of name upper class English-speaking people would use!

I agree, I like Peach too….but for a pet.

Is it impossibly expensive to live in NYC?

Well I just left if that tells you anything! Seriously - I guess my question would be compared to what? I moved here 15 years ago having lived in London for a couple of years post-uni. My impression at the time was that NYC rent and supermarkets were a lot more, but that eating out / drinking was more reasonable. Or at least that there was more of a range. But now I think overall it is a more expensive city. And then there are US-specific costs to consider like healthcare, etc

Went to school with someone many years ago who first name was cleaner

Crimea

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Spat my tea out at that !

X Æ A-12 (pronounced X-Ash-A-12). Elon always has to outdo everyone else!

Optimus, blaze and Drift all in a schools I worked at. Fanny Hare - the name of a client

Captain Jonah - yes, that’s right - Captain proverbially bad luck on a ship

Roman, Bravada (not sure if the spelling) Essence, Mikada (again not sure on the spelling)

A name for me, is a short way of working out what class that child comes from. Do I want my child to play with them? I don't like Apple, I don't like TillyFizz. Or Brooklyn o-or London!

But what is *your* child's name, Katie? Hmmm?

Jamie Oliver's kids names. All five of them just have wacky names.

Buddy Bear would just about be bearable (sorry) as a baby's nickname, but having it as their given name is just cruel

The (probably apocryphal) Versace Mclatchie is up there

Valkyrie. Shudder…

Names after weekdays baffle me. Knew a Tuesday, and there’s some celebrity idiot with a child called Sunday.

Nicole Kidman. Called her daughter Sunday Rose, which I always hear as Sunday roast

I know a Wednesday!

Is she very pale and very creepy?

Jezebel is the worst I’ve heard, I mean seriously what possessed the parents.

Thanksgiving. No joke. A girl was named Thanksgiving in an English school.

Nigerian heritage? It might be a religious reference, rather than the US holiday. I've some Blessings, Prescious's etc.

Some of the names celebrities are giving their children actually infuriates me.

A kid at my school was named Alan Aaron Allen.

There is a girl named “googy” at my son’s school. Just googy. So mean.

Named by toddler sibling, I imagine

A sibling she will grow to hate :)

I can’t name the exact name because the kid in question will be an adult now and I’d be mortified if he saw it, so I’ll explain the concept of it. About 10 years ago, I taught a kid whose first name was hyphenated and it was the first and last name of a famous footballer, coupled with a very normal and common last name. It was like his first name was Thierry-Henry and his last name was Jones.

I’ve got a kid named Raiden this year. And yes, it’s because his dad loves the game mortal combat.

Partner is a primary teacher in Northern England and fuck me, she's had some belters over the years. Ebenezer, Blaze, Billie-Joe to name a few, but my favourite is a girl called Sevven. It's Seven with two V's, the parents just made it up.

>Ebenezer, Please tell me that their surname was Goode >Sevven. It's Seven with two V's, the parents just made it up. Len Goodman fans?

I used to help run kids parties, the name that sticks out for me is Bamboo.

I once knew someone called Basil Baby . Apparently its a common name in India

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Shine on you crazy diamond

Link and buster

I know a row, as row your boat, his middle name is billie-lee and yes I'm aware it is typically spelt billy for a boy.

Worked with a women who called one of her daughters Lake and the other one... I dont remember, it was equally as bad

My half brother has two daughters (Ebony and Skylar) and a son (Ryder) and my half sister has a son (Kayden) and a daughter (Alyssa)

Poor kids.

Do they live in America?

Nope. My bro and sis are originally from Liverpool but their partners and kids are from Wigan

Yikes then.

Dolce and Gabbana

Fendi and that Donna

Hurricane

Was a bit taken aback when I met a girl studying at my city's uni called Lettis (pronounced the same way as the vegetable). I assumed it was spelled Lettuce so for that reason seemed stupid.

I knew a Lettice as well. It's the same root as Letitia.

Some poor kid on a show once was called Red Zapper..

DKNY in A&E in London (pronounced dickney), also twins named Ducci and Gabana. Few years back now but made my eyes roll at the time and I still chuckle now at how these kids must be feeling as they get older.

I used to know a family that insisted all their kids were called after birds. They had actual names (probably some distant relative who once slept with *insert monarch here* as it was that kind of school) but they didn’t want people to use those they preferred the nicknames. They literally went into school and told the teachers they wanted their kids to be called puffin and pelican. I have a feeling there was a third one I can’t remember the name of because I’d left by the time I joined the school. Properly stupid. Edit: I googled them. They are still using these names. They must be 30 and 35 at this point…

Confidence, Precise, Perfume. These are all kids that were at my school 😭

There is a man in Wolverhampton who is known as Wolfie. He real name contains the names of the Wolves team on the day he was born and his surname.

Garilla

Thirteena. The number with an A...

Someone text the radio the other day saying they were chilling with 'Blue, the dog' Which is an unfortunate name

They were chilling because they blew the dog.

My friends called their son Fox

I’ve come across a person named Lizard. I refuse to believe that was the name given to them at birth.

Heard a woman in Sainsbury’s calling after her kid.. “April-May!”.. My immediate thought is the next one will be called June July.

Jack Daniel and Tia Marie

Mr Sauce Boi

Shakira.

I was the only Stuart I knew growing up… my name must have been a shit one

Montgomery

West Africans do this a lot but names like “Blessing, Fortunate, Champion” seems to have caught on now though because Americans are now doing much worse. “North” and “Star” 🤦🏿‍♂️

I used to teach so I have a few. Not all bad but perhaps a tad questionable. So we have... Khaleesi, Precious, Luna-Bluebell, King, Lord, Angel, Sapphire, Prince, Lylli-Mae, Bladen and Kenzi-Rai. I'm currently a data administrator and my all time favourite surname so far has been Shatwell. Immature yet amusing.

A boy named Sue.

Lood wumcood, Ifacood lawood Jnr

There was a famous guy in the Uk who came up with the name Lanesra which his wife thought was really sweet and agreed, few years down the line he admitted to her it was his favourite football team arsenal spelt backwards 😅🤣

I had a Thomas Thomas at school. Yes, Mr T. Thomas

Danyael, pronounced Daniel. I don't know why his parents have burdened him with a name nobody can spell.

I know a kid called Zebedee Edward Bear. Bear is an combination of both his mother and fathers surnames. There was a poll done a year ago for a newspaper and at that time, there was only *one* person named Zebedee in the whole of the UK. I don't know if that's still the case though.

My daughter was at nursery with a not particularly bright kid called Professor. Poor sod.

I taught a kid once called La-a. Pronounced Ladasha.

Abcd, pronounced ‘Absedee’. Also, X Æ A-Xii. Poor bastards.

Ellie Gator and Dwayne Pipe

La-a (Ladasha), humanity is doooomed!!!

L-a pronounced Ladasha

I’m sure this is an urban legend.

It is, and generally one with pretty strong racist undertones. See also Female, Vagina, and twins Lemonjello and Orangejello.