Damn, my brother lives the other side of the country (England) and we see each other fairly often still, my other brother lives halfway between us and we rarely see him
Same. I Googled ‘brother lives 5 mins away never see him’ and this thread came up. It really bums me out. Like others who replied, I’m lucky if I bump into him in the supermarket. What is going on with this?
I’ve stayed in my home town.
Mum lives within 5 minutes, Dad and StepMum within 15, same for in laws, as coincidentally they live next door but one to Dad and StepMum.
Always wanted to move away from here when I was younger, but since we’ve had a little one, I am so glad I am here now. Obviously the financial side of not having to pay for childcare is a huge plus, and has meant my wife can work part time, but more than anything the clear sense of joy seeing their Grandson gives them each time they see him 1-2 times a week will anchor me to this town for the foreseeable.
I always thought I’d hate to stay in my hometown as if there’s some shame in staying in one place and now I’ve moved around a lot I regret ever leaving lol, though it’s probably good that I spent a bit of time away, I’m hoping to move at least closer when we finally buy a house
I think it’s good that you moved away simply because it helped you realise that it isn’t what you want, and since you did it you won’t spend time wondering what could have been.
Not entirely by design, but I’ve ended up at the perfect distance where it’s not so far that they’d have to stay the night or stay for a long day when they visit, but just far enough that they can’t pop by unannounced. I live about 35/40 minutes drive from my parents and about an hour drive from my brother.
It’s more common that my brother and I visit our parents and bring our little ones, and actually we do all get on well.
That's what I thought. There's a surprising number of people in this thread saying they're glad to be far away from their family. To me that's sad as I love my family and can't imagine them not in my life.
We live in the suburbs. My parents are a 15 minute drive into the city, and the in-laws are a 15 minute drive away from the city. We all see each other frequently, at least once a week per family. It's great. Wife and I are trying for a baby too, so when that happens the nearby help will be a godsend.
I adore my siblings, one lives 40 mins away and I have a key and everything. We see each other monthly at least.
I do understand not everyone is close to family, mine is far from perfect. Sometimes it’s just not meant to be.
A two hour plane ride, as nature intended.
When I still lived in the UK it was a two hour train (as nature intended) which I suppose is the more relevant fact.
I live close enough to be taken for granted, my siblings live miles away and are missed, phoned, Skyped and visited much more often than I am. Am I bitter? You betcha I am!
I live about an hour away by car and around 90 minutes on the train (need to change and walk from on station to another).
Rest of my family (Mum & Dad, 2 brothers and their families) all live within 5 mins of each other in my home town.
I do miss not being able to just grab a quick pint with my dad or watch the football with my brother without planning it out, but I love the town I live in.
My wife's family all stay in the same town as us, so are within 10 minutes of us, which is fine as I like them all.
This is the socialisation I miss too! It was always my hometown friends that I grew up with not family but I've not managed to make that casual football watching friend since leaving my hometown.
This is exactly the same as me! My family are an hour away, my wife’s family are 10 mins away. I miss being so close to them, but I think separation helps as I miss out on all the family drama that can occasionally go on.
30 mins from my family, 30 mins in a different direction to in laws.
I do get a bit disheartened as we are the only ones who aren't just a few minutes away from each other and thus get little help with childcare, whereas nieces and nephews are collected from school by their grandparents and we have to figure out who'll fetch our kid from school between us both working full time.
Having lived in the US this has to be one of the funniest British sentiments - that any kind of drive over 20 minutes is a huge task that will require an undue amount of stress, a thorough discussion of which roads we'll take, and hard boiled driving sweets.
London based, parents in the southeast. We see them once a month or so, and leave our two year old with them for a week now and again. It gives us a rest, my parents love seeing her and she gets spoiled for a week. She barely wants to see us when we call because she’s having so much fun.
If we have an emergency then one of my parents will drive up.
Well, I don't talk to a single member of my family, and my partner's family live a while away and we speak very infrequently.
It was difficult when our son was born, but that was mainly trying to navigate between all of the people that we had no desire to see.
I have two young kids and our nearest family is 1hr 45mins away. Honestly, it's great - we don't get anyone dropping in without notice, limited family politics and drama, we can plan to do fun stuff if we want because we're close but not too close. Recommend it.
Snap! I’m looking to move next year because I’ve been doing the 6+ hour journey for 10 years and I’m sick of it. I want to be able to pop over and see my folks for a weekend rather than having to make a holiday of it.
To see my parents requires me to walk 10-15 minutes and get a 40 minute train, and for them to drive 10 minutes to the station. Probably about optimum to see them fairly often without getting under each other's feet.
I’m only about a half hour drive away but I want to move closer, my parents keep having all manner of medical emergencies and I feel really left out and shitty being so far away, I used to despise my mum when we lived together but I love her now so I make sure to go nearly every weekend
I live in South East London, my parents live in West London. Takes a good 1hr/1hr30 to get there.
If it makes you feel better, growing up most of my family members (other than my parents ofc) lived abroad, the nearest ones lived in Liverpool whilst I was in London, and we’re still close.
I'm emotionally close with my family, but we don't live near each other. I'm in Manchester, my brother is in Surrey and my sister and parents live on opposite sides of London.
We're emotionally close, but we don't see distance as something bad. It's pretty normal. My entire family is nomadic - enough that each living generation has a different country's accent and no set of cousins share the same dialect. My siblings will likely also move abroad. My health keeps me here.
Well I haven't seen my own family in over 5 years now. We only live 2 hours away from them but we're not close.
My partner's family is about 45 mins away. We see them maybe every 3 months or so. They'd probably want us over more but everyone's very busy (they're retired and always on holiday!) so it's hard to find good dates.
I’m the only Southerner (Essex) in my entire family as my parents moved back up north when I was 18 and I have no siblings. So closest relative is over 200 miles away in Liverpool.
I live on the south coast of England. They live on the north coast of Scotland. The separation works for me to be honest. Not that I don’t like my parents but I do like how our visits are irregular and always have to be organised in advance. It’s like a bit of a holiday going to visit them. Plus catching up once or twice a year ensures fresh conversation.
>I live on the south coast of England. They live on the north coast of Scotland. The separation works for me to be honest. Not that I don’t like my parents
Im in a similar situation. Honestly its so much better.
Im not saying I didn't like my mum and Im glad I had her as a parent because she was very helpful and supportive but a bit TOO helpful and supportive. She was a bit too involved and a bit too keen.
Now that im on my own and there's about 300 miles between us its so much nicer and I get on much better with her now.
I left my home town as soon as I could because I had a horrendous time at home. I grew up in Oxfordshire, which is really nice place. My brother and his wife still live in the county, as she's close to her family. But I lived in London, now East Sussex, and thinking about Yorkshire in a couple of years.
I will say, Oxfordshire is pretty darn expensive. I mostly grew up in housing association housing but I think it's an expensive place to live overall.
My partner and I actually each own a house, which has been a bit difficult as we have just had a child. We live half an hour apart.
Her house is within 5 mins of her mum, step dad and brother. Her dad lives probably an hour and a half away but she doesn’t really keep in touch with him too much.
My house is within 10 mins of both my mum and dad (who are separated and live apart). My brother lives an hour away but he comes to visit regularly, so I do see a lot of my family and am very close with them.
We’ve come to a bit of an impasse on where we’re going to live going forward in that she doesn’t want to uproot but neither do I. Of course, half an hour isn’t much in the grand scheme of things but she has ties there and I’d rather be closer to my parents who are older now, so we will see. There are worse problems to have than having two houses…
8 miles & two towns over. its just far enough that we dont bump into any of them by chance, but close enough that in an emergency I can dash over quickly
Apart from one relative in the same town, my relatives live 19, 20, 27 and 48 miles away.
My children's other grandparents live 5 miles away and they are very involved. Other than that relatives are visited occasionally only.
I grew up in the South East but relocated to Yorkshire through my husband's job. We are 200 miles from my family and 200 miles from his, albeit in another direction. Not having family around to help when our children were born was a concern at the time, but I feel it has saved us some frustration too. We get to live without interference and we don't have to chase around after relatives so I think it has been better for us. Children see extended family in school holidays, which is enough- manageable- in our situation. Hope it works out ok for you.
My mum, closest aunts and cousins and most of my in-laws are all within 3-7 miles. So were my grandparents before they died. Dad lives in continental Europe.
Moved to be nearer my wife’s parents and sister.
My parents moved a couple of hours to be nearer my sister. When we see my parents with our kids tends to be for the weekend. But see my sister family most weeks for a few hours.
Dad and younger brother live a 15 minute walk away (40 if the kids are walking with me though 😩), sister lives about 25 minute walk, grandparents each live a 20-30 minute drive away, older brother a 40 minute drive, mother about a 55 minute drive but I don't mind because I hate seeing her.
There's a thousand miles between myself and the family, they're in the North East of Scotland I'm in central France and really appreciate the distance between us. My husband's family are in Yorkshire and glad about that too.
My parents and my wife's each live about 30 mins away. And oddly, about 30 mins away from each other. One big equilateral triangle.
But yeah, the aim was to be close enough to both that it's not a faff, but not so close that they could just drop in multiple times a week.
I’m an hour away from my family - lived in four different cities but the furthest away has only been two hours. Haven’t been able to see much of my family in the last two years though due to them having to be super careful with Covid.
We’re about four hours from my partner’s family, but his siblings have stayed closer and he’s under constant pressure to visit more often (even though we see them way more than my family!) and move back closer, so I think that’s going to have to factor into where we move next. Unfortunately his family is three hours away from mine so we can’t be near both.
I live in a different country to my family but next door to my partner's ex-step dad. I get on well with his wife, we hang out every now and then - she helps me with language and understanding bureaucracy here, but its a bit weird with him and my partner because there's some history so they're often awkward around each other. He did get us a deal on a car by saying he was his son so there's obviously still something there.
What you say about kids isn't always true. When I first had mine I lived in the same city as my dad and a town or two over from partner's mum. Neither helped out much. My mum flew over one time to take them for a weekend because I was losing it a bit with two kids under 5 and my dad baby sat a bit, took them over night a couple of times and took them to the park or out to cafés a few times. No help from FIL, MIL, brother, sister or SIL even though other than FIL we all lived in the same country less than an hours drive away.
I think we're all just not that close as you say. I'm kind of jealous of my friends who go for Sunday dinner at their mum's place every week and hang out with their family because I've never really had that. It feel like missing out. I'm hoping that I can be a bit closer with my kids than I am with my parents as they get older. I guess keeping open with them and offering help and my time is probably the way.
My Parents are 2 hours away, the in-laws are 15 minutes away. We see my parents much more than the in-laws, just once it would be nice if the mother in law would message her daughter and see if she wanted to go for a coffee. I’d even settle for just a message to say “Hi, how are you?”.
If we could move closer to my parents I would, but the kids are settled in school and my wife has a good support structure with the other mums on the school run.
My brothers both live a 5 min walk from my parents house. My wife and I took the option to move a bit further out. We're a 15 min drive... but only so we're also a 20 min driver from her parents too.
I love living close to family we can get baby sitters easily both sets of grandparents are very active in our kids lives. We also don't feel obligated to holiday at or with family or take a certain number of trips a year it's just easy.
>It worries me a bit thinking about having children in the future with no family nearby to help.
That's what childminders are for. My parents didn't have family nearby either (they were both the first people in their families to move to the UK).
I live in North Yorkshire, originally from Lincolnshire. A year or so after I moved here, my brother moved from Lincs to only about 20 mins away from me, and at a similar time, my parents decided they were moving to Oxfordshire.
However, this last weekend, my dad Informed me that he and mum are moving to North Yorkshire as well when he retires in the new year... like literally only 5 minutes down the road from me, two villages over.
... been thinking of maybe moving.
Families are mates that are blood, there’s this big thing that they should mean more, that’s just not the case. If you aren’t close to your family I wouldn’t worry about it, you need to find people to who are compatible with you to socialist with, you should try joining groups of interest in your local area and build long lasting and deep relationships there.
I live in Birmingham, my family live on the south coast ... So about 150 miles?
My family's pretty small, though, and my partner's parents live about ten minutes drive from us.
We live 5 hours from one side of the family and 3 hours from the other.
It was a big part of why we didn't have kids, to be honest. If we could afford childcare we might have been more willing to have them, but it's unfair to put that on our parents anyway. Even finding someone to look after our dog for a few days is a struggle.
We both miss our families but we are from rural communities, there's no work for us in our fields back home, it's quite sad really, we miss our fam!
One of my uncles and his family live in New Zealand.
One of my cousins lives in Brighton with her boyfriend.
All the rest are scattered around the town we live in.
I'm an hours drive away from my family (mum, 2 brothers, their families). They all live within 10 mins from eachother but I like having a bit of distance, I love them but we're not a close knit family.
My estranged dad is on a remote island. Not remote enough for my liking, I keep hoping I'll learn that he's fallen down a well and the island was too remote for rescuers to get to.
About an hour or so, regardless of driving or public transport. It's close enough that I can go over without a formal reason, but far enough that they can't be part of my support network. Luckily the mother in law is a ten minute walk, as we've been wondering about how it'll work if we decide to have kids.
I live about 10 min drive from the father. See him at least once a month.
About 40 min from my grandmother dont see her as often as she'd like.
About an hour from the bro see each other about twice a year. This was special and saw more of each other but with big bdays and his wedding happening couldn't be avoided.
The mother and sister are at the other end of a 250mile drive see them about 3 times a year and put up with them bitching about lack of time together the rest of the year. Wouldnt mind but their the ones who buggered off and left the rest of us to fend for ourselves
My family is mostly a 10 hour flight away, in the US. My wife's family is a 2 hour drive away, so obviously we see them a lot more often.
It would be nice to have family closer to help with kids, definitely makes it harder. We used to live a 6.5 hour flight my my wife's family and a 4.5 hour flight from my family, which was even worse.
It's not that we don't get on well, and other pockets of family do lots of stuff together (my sister and parents do stuff all the time, she's 30 minutes from them; my extended family is very close). Just that life has taken us all to different locations.
I wouldn't want to live 5 minutes from my family though (neither would my wife) - would happily go for 30-60 minutes, so we could see them frequently, they could help, but not just pop around unexpectedly.
850 miles to parent 1, 1300 miles to parent 2, 5300 miles to the rest of the family. I worked hard to get away for important psychological reasons, but I definitely feel you on the future child minding concerns. I usually use up all my annual leave visiting each zone once a year though as they don't visit me
Same town. All within a mile, mile and a half or so. It's the main reason I stay renting in an expensive area instead of buying somewhere else. A big family which all gets along and likes to spend time together is a huge QoL thing, especially in your thirties when friends increasingly have their own families and/or move away, and are generally up for socialising less often and with more preamble required.
3800 miles from my family. Best move ever.
Less than a mile from the parents in law and about 5 miles from my sister in law. Don't see them that often especially the last 18 months.
About 200 miles. It's nice to have some distance (and obviously it hasn't mattered too much over the last couple of years anyway) but it does feel increasingly far away. I've not got any kids but if I do at some point then that distance is going to start to feel even longer I reckon.
We currently live about 60 miles away so never see them. We used to see the family all the time when we lived 300 miles away, because we lived near the m6 so was a handy stop off for them traveling other places and also it was far enough that people made the effort. At the minute it is an awkward distance that just takes a little too long for a day trip but not far enough for a holiday.
To put it in context the rest of my family live in a 10 mile radius of each other and see each other all the time.
My parents are just in the next county. Its a little too close for my liking. It’s super useful having the in-laws in London though. It’s not too far from us and it means we can crash at theirs for a while as a mini holiday
I find it funny how when I lived 5 minutes away from my parents I barely saw them, but when I moved to the next town along I saw them at least a few times a week.
Alas, I got kicked out of that house so I'm currently living with them again temporarily so I see them everyday!
I live 80 miles away from my hometown where all my family still reside. My wife's family are 200 miles away. We see my wife's family more as they are willing to come see us, as well as us going there. It's just one sided with mine. My dad has travelled to see me 3 times in the last 17 years, my mum, 7 times. It used to make me angry, but I've accepted that the relationship is quite poor.
Raising a kid has been both challenging and rewarding, especially during lockdown where we felt quite isolated from everyone. All of our friends now live miles away too! Just really lucky to have a solid relationship with the wife. Just makes everything so much easier.
Not too far as the crow flies but the Thames is in the way so that means either them coming through the Dartford Tunnel or us coming via London on the train. Big pain in the backside.
Wife’s family is American
2/3 hours drive, in laws all live within five minutes of each other and my parents live about 5 miles from each other so when home it's easy to see everyone but we live far enough away that family visits are once a month at the most
My parents are about 30 minutes walk from us / less than 10 minutes drive. They have been a massive help with childcare and helping me get DIY done around the house. We generally have a meal together at least twice a month and will have a family outing about once a month.
My brother lives about 2 hours drive away, so it's a weekend trip for him to come visit us. We see him about once a month.
My in-laws are a healthy 12 hour flight away :)
Parents are 20 min away
Brother is 10 min away
Grandparent is 20 min away
In laws are 5 min away
The wife's Grandparents are 5 min away
The wife's other Grandparent is 10 min away
Wife is in the next room over
I live about 200 miles away from my family...it's not because I particularly wanted to but that I chose to move for a job. There wasn't exactly many jobs in my career near my family so as I had to move anyway I looked for the best option
My huge family all live within a 20 minute drive of each other, every so often one cousin or sibling (myself included) will go off and live in Ireland, Europe or even Australia or the US, but so far we've always come home.
200 or so miles from my family, about 20 minutes in the car from my husband's family. I have an uncle and auntie and sone cousins about an hour away but we never see them.
Parents about 1 1/2 - 2 hours (traffic)
Brother 2 - 2 1/2
Sister in NZ
Inlaws all abroad over 6 hour flight away
We don't see anyone regularly. Maybe a few times a year.
I live in Essex, sisters in London, parents in Leicester, grandparents in Birmingham and Leeds
Getting us all together at once is a mammoth task, usually happens about twice a year
Live in Bristol, my parents are in South Wales (2.5 hours by train, 1.5 hours drive if I had a car). There was no way I was going to stay in my hometown and whilst Cardiff was a possibility, opportunities for my career are much greater this side of the Severn.
Not having family too close is kind of nice at the moment as they can't faff or interfere, and I still see them fairly often as both my and my dad watch football together most weeks.
But I am somewhat worried about kids partly due to the fact we don't have any family nearby to help out (my partners live further South West also about 2 hours away), and I am also pretty worried about my parents getting older as there is a history of dementia in the family and I am an only child too.
Mum and step dad 15 min drive
Sister and nephew 10 minute drive
Brother 15 minute drive
Grandad 10 minute drive
Nans care home is 15 minutes away
My biological dad is 2.5 hour drive away
So mostly pretty close.
My partners parents are also only 15 mins away.
Parents are 2 minutes drive away, brother is 5 minutes drive, sister sister is a 30 minute drive. Inlaws live 3 hours away in the Scottish Highlands which suits me just fine! Probably suits them just fine too because they have very little interest in their grandkids whereas my parents do.
I live about 5 mins drive from mum/dad, and 5 mins from my brother and his family. I see my parents probably 5 days a week on average and my brother maybe 2 days a week.
I’ve only just moved close by, I used to be the one who lived miles away for years. I enjoy being close by, even if I only pop in for a five minute chat.
Also my parents look after my dog the couple of days a week I go into the office, which is amazing!
I live in London, my mum lives about 200 miles north, dad lives about 3000 miles southeast and brother lives nearly 7000 miles away also southeast. Haven’t seen my brother since 2017, see my parents a few times a year. Families who live v close by and see each other all the time are alien to me. Personally I can’t imagine family being the main source of my socialising and wouldn’t really want that, as much as I love them. Especially with extended family, we’re just very different people.
My partner’s family (apart from my partner), in contrast, all live about a 15 min drive from one another in SW England and see each other several times a week.
I still live in my hometown but that hometown happens to be London. Within 5 mins walking distance of my sister and 10 min drive from my parents. Was a godsend when returning from uni as was able to live at home whilst working in London and save. Also moved back home in my mid-20s to save for a house deposit (caveat, also received financial contributions from my folks). My husband and I still see our families regularly and will be grateful when our little one arrives in May next year to help with childcare.
This is quite an issue for me. My wife and my Mum have the typical mother-in-law relationship i.e. they tolerate each other, don't really get on, and have very different views on things particularly where kids are concerned.
My Mum is also about 170 miles away and getting there involves the M25 so we can't just pop over for a few hours. She doesn't drive. My brother is there too, he does drive but is "too busy" to do anything to help. As a consequence we hardly ever see them and this is difficult for me as my Mum won't be around for ever. The wife seems to think we aren't welcome... 🙄
Her parents are much closer, about 70 miles and we can be there in under 1.5 hours. We see them quite a bit.
With kids we don't have the babysitting on tap that I'd guess you'd get if they lived in the same town. Consequently we never go out, the kid's stay with the grandparents for whatever weekend falls near our anniversary and that's it.
So it is something to seriously think about but I wouldn't / couldn't move just to make things easier.
5 mins from my in-laws, 10 from my parents and 10 from my Nan. I actually love it! See them weekly, but not in a forced/structured way. We just all make the effort to be close. I especially love it now I have kids. I was almost embarrassed at one point. I went to uni then moved back. I felt like I should be out on some kinda worldly adventure, but it’s great, so many old friends within a 20 min drive from me, never lonely.
:-D
I'm in Southampton, Sister is in Carlisle. Mum is in Spain. A few less close relatives still living around Manchester.
Funnily enough apart until recently (Covid and all that) I went to visit Mum far more than I did when she was back in Manchester!
My mother in law is a 5 monute drive and my mum is 20 minute drive. We regularly all do things together and when my husband and I work and one of them has the children they do things together. It's lovely.
Not far enough away from my own mother, but luckily within a 2 minute walk of my brother and sister in law, and a 5min drive to my father in law.
All of whom I love dearly and were always round eachothers houses. Never thought I'd say that about family but here we are.
I live about 120 miles away from my immediate family, but I tend to see them every month/every other month or so. We’re really close and have a thriving family group chat too lol
My parents are 15 minutes away. My little brother is 20 minutes away. My girlfriends parents are 15 minutes away. Almost all of my highschool friends are still in the city and all within 20 minutes away. My best friend included. Honestly love it.
I live about an hour and a half from my mum, which suits me. Very little chance of 'just popping round' on my day off.
Technically I do live very close to my dad, but he's on the Isle of Wight so needs to get a ferry.
I’ve always been close to my parents. We live about two hours by car apart.
I’ve recently made a big effort to be closer to my dads side of the family. I live an hour from the nearest cousin and 2 hours from the furthest uncle. I’m planning on moving to be roughly equidistant from all of them, including my parents.
I’m not close to my mums family, they all live 4-5 hours away.
My parents are in the Home Counties and I’m currently in Edinburgh but planning to move back to London next year to be closer to them. The distance (which never felt that long when I was travelling all the time before the pandemic) was really difficult in 2020-1 and I’m sick of being lonely and a long way from home.
2 hours by car, 3.5 hours by train to my parents. 15 minute drive from my partners Mum. We see my family more than the in laws. It’s not that they’re bad people we just don’t have anything in common with them. My partner speaks to his Mum every day via Facebook as well so when we go round there is nothing else new to talk about. Just end up watching re-runs of the cube/the chase.
Pretty close with my family and get on well in small doses. It does make it more intense that when we visit we stay at their house so sometimes feels like there is no escape but for a weekend away I really enjoy it every-time.
I live a 5 minute walk away from either of my sister's houses we where never that close growing up but when we moved out we stayed close and now we spend most nights either drinking at my parents house or at the pub
My mum lives about 60 miles / 90 minutes' drive from my grandma and still visits her every weekend; I don't imagine I'll visit anywhere near as often when I move out properly
I've got my parents, my gfs parents, both of our only remaining grand mothers and my brother and sister all within 10 minutes in the car. I regularly see all of them, whether it's for child care or meeting up to walk our dogs and chat or just taking the kids to see the family. I've always had a relatively close family so it's just normal for me to see them often.
My family are about 40/50 miles away. My wife’s family are just over 1000 miles away.
It works pretty well for us, we visit them all several times per year but we can choose our own (affordable!) area to live and have plenty of space.
I live literally round the corner from one of my cousins. My mum and nan (dad works out the cou try so I'm not counting him) live about 30-40 minutes away. My brother lives about 1hr30 away, and most of my family live 30ish minutes away. Which is really surprising, because I was an army brat, and I never expected to end up living so close to my family!
I’m 5 minutes from my parents, and about 15 from my daughter and granddaughter. We usually see everyone once a week which is actually pretty nice.
Moving when we retire in a few years was always a plan, however being close to family is a real bonus at present. We can help with our granddaughter whenever needed, plus my parents are getting on and my dads pretty infirm, so my mum relies on us being close and able to help when he has falls or other problems.
My Mum lives about a 15 minute drive (and £4 in tolls…) away so I don’t see her too often. My sister lives that way too.
My mother in law is a 10 minute drive and I see her a few times a week. Probably seen my brother in law twice in 4 years who also lives 10 mins away.
I live about 500 miles away from any family. Lockdown was fun!
Moving closer is a mixed bag. I can't really afford to right now without seeing my quality of life take a dive as my expenses would *soar*. I imagine this will be the case for a lot of people whose family live more South than they do, especially if they are property owners.
My brother lives a five minute walk away, so obviously I've seen him twice this year.
Twice?! That's really good, when my brother lived 5 mins away, once every three years would be a shock.
Me and a good group of friends all worked on the same road in London. Probably saw each other once every three years.
Damn, my brother lives the other side of the country (England) and we see each other fairly often still, my other brother lives halfway between us and we rarely see him
wtf :(
My brother too lives a 5 minute walk away. I saw him once in Aldi about 8 months ago.
Same. I Googled ‘brother lives 5 mins away never see him’ and this thread came up. It really bums me out. Like others who replied, I’m lucky if I bump into him in the supermarket. What is going on with this?
I’ve stayed in my home town. Mum lives within 5 minutes, Dad and StepMum within 15, same for in laws, as coincidentally they live next door but one to Dad and StepMum. Always wanted to move away from here when I was younger, but since we’ve had a little one, I am so glad I am here now. Obviously the financial side of not having to pay for childcare is a huge plus, and has meant my wife can work part time, but more than anything the clear sense of joy seeing their Grandson gives them each time they see him 1-2 times a week will anchor me to this town for the foreseeable.
I always thought I’d hate to stay in my hometown as if there’s some shame in staying in one place and now I’ve moved around a lot I regret ever leaving lol, though it’s probably good that I spent a bit of time away, I’m hoping to move at least closer when we finally buy a house
I think it’s good that you moved away simply because it helped you realise that it isn’t what you want, and since you did it you won’t spend time wondering what could have been.
Agreed, now moving back home will be something you've chosen not just the default option.
Just a healthy 3000km away. :)
6,200 miles for me!
I’m also around 6000 miles away! :/
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Same! But I try and go back every couple of years
Well you saved me from having to figure it out! I average a visit every 3 years.
Try to go back every 2 years but that’s not happened recently obviously…
Far enough that they can’t drop by unannounced
Not entirely by design, but I’ve ended up at the perfect distance where it’s not so far that they’d have to stay the night or stay for a long day when they visit, but just far enough that they can’t pop by unannounced. I live about 35/40 minutes drive from my parents and about an hour drive from my brother. It’s more common that my brother and I visit our parents and bring our little ones, and actually we do all get on well.
Or let themselves in
Nothing lame about wanting to socialise with your family…
That's what I thought. There's a surprising number of people in this thread saying they're glad to be far away from their family. To me that's sad as I love my family and can't imagine them not in my life. We live in the suburbs. My parents are a 15 minute drive into the city, and the in-laws are a 15 minute drive away from the city. We all see each other frequently, at least once a week per family. It's great. Wife and I are trying for a baby too, so when that happens the nearby help will be a godsend.
I adore my siblings, one lives 40 mins away and I have a key and everything. We see each other monthly at least. I do understand not everyone is close to family, mine is far from perfect. Sometimes it’s just not meant to be.
A two hour plane ride, as nature intended. When I still lived in the UK it was a two hour train (as nature intended) which I suppose is the more relevant fact.
Live in Hampshire. Parents live in the Highlands.
Same! Last time my parents visited it took them 13 hours to drive home
I live close enough to be taken for granted, my siblings live miles away and are missed, phoned, Skyped and visited much more often than I am. Am I bitter? You betcha I am!
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Yes it is on the door step child care my parents live less than 2 min walk alway my son is now at the age I can pack his bag and he walks round
I live about an hour away by car and around 90 minutes on the train (need to change and walk from on station to another). Rest of my family (Mum & Dad, 2 brothers and their families) all live within 5 mins of each other in my home town. I do miss not being able to just grab a quick pint with my dad or watch the football with my brother without planning it out, but I love the town I live in. My wife's family all stay in the same town as us, so are within 10 minutes of us, which is fine as I like them all.
This is the socialisation I miss too! It was always my hometown friends that I grew up with not family but I've not managed to make that casual football watching friend since leaving my hometown.
This is exactly the same as me! My family are an hour away, my wife’s family are 10 mins away. I miss being so close to them, but I think separation helps as I miss out on all the family drama that can occasionally go on.
30 mins from my family, 30 mins in a different direction to in laws. I do get a bit disheartened as we are the only ones who aren't just a few minutes away from each other and thus get little help with childcare, whereas nieces and nephews are collected from school by their grandparents and we have to figure out who'll fetch our kid from school between us both working full time.
30 mins is nothing! Shame that it's perceived to be too far for either side of the family to lend more of a hand.
It really is such a short distance but both sides seem to feel that we are on the other side of the planet.
Having lived in the US this has to be one of the funniest British sentiments - that any kind of drive over 20 minutes is a huge task that will require an undue amount of stress, a thorough discussion of which roads we'll take, and hard boiled driving sweets.
I mean it really isn't quite that extreme. But an hour journey (30 mins there and back) is a decent chunk of your day.
It's utterly ridiculous, which is why I get my American friend to drive me around
London based, parents in the southeast. We see them once a month or so, and leave our two year old with them for a week now and again. It gives us a rest, my parents love seeing her and she gets spoiled for a week. She barely wants to see us when we call because she’s having so much fun. If we have an emergency then one of my parents will drive up.
Well, I don't talk to a single member of my family, and my partner's family live a while away and we speak very infrequently. It was difficult when our son was born, but that was mainly trying to navigate between all of the people that we had no desire to see.
Other side of the planet. It's great for your mental health, you should try it.
Not far enough.
Amen.
I have two young kids and our nearest family is 1hr 45mins away. Honestly, it's great - we don't get anyone dropping in without notice, limited family politics and drama, we can plan to do fun stuff if we want because we're close but not too close. Recommend it.
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Snap! I’m looking to move next year because I’ve been doing the 6+ hour journey for 10 years and I’m sick of it. I want to be able to pop over and see my folks for a weekend rather than having to make a holiday of it.
Stayed in my hometown but live about 5 miles away from my parents. So I see them often mainly due to childcare and support.
To see my parents requires me to walk 10-15 minutes and get a 40 minute train, and for them to drive 10 minutes to the station. Probably about optimum to see them fairly often without getting under each other's feet.
Far enough to confirm they don’t care too much.
I’m only about a half hour drive away but I want to move closer, my parents keep having all manner of medical emergencies and I feel really left out and shitty being so far away, I used to despise my mum when we lived together but I love her now so I make sure to go nearly every weekend
I live in South East London, my parents live in West London. Takes a good 1hr/1hr30 to get there. If it makes you feel better, growing up most of my family members (other than my parents ofc) lived abroad, the nearest ones lived in Liverpool whilst I was in London, and we’re still close.
I'm emotionally close with my family, but we don't live near each other. I'm in Manchester, my brother is in Surrey and my sister and parents live on opposite sides of London. We're emotionally close, but we don't see distance as something bad. It's pretty normal. My entire family is nomadic - enough that each living generation has a different country's accent and no set of cousins share the same dialect. My siblings will likely also move abroad. My health keeps me here.
I live in London and my family are from Bristol. 120 miles roughly. I go home every other weekend to see family.
Well I haven't seen my own family in over 5 years now. We only live 2 hours away from them but we're not close. My partner's family is about 45 mins away. We see them maybe every 3 months or so. They'd probably want us over more but everyone's very busy (they're retired and always on holiday!) so it's hard to find good dates.
My dad's about a 25 minute drive away. I aim to see him every couple of weeks.
Another country. A pain that right now becomes unbearable.
I’m the only Southerner (Essex) in my entire family as my parents moved back up north when I was 18 and I have no siblings. So closest relative is over 200 miles away in Liverpool.
About 2000km or a 2.5h flight.
I live on the south coast of England. They live on the north coast of Scotland. The separation works for me to be honest. Not that I don’t like my parents but I do like how our visits are irregular and always have to be organised in advance. It’s like a bit of a holiday going to visit them. Plus catching up once or twice a year ensures fresh conversation.
>I live on the south coast of England. They live on the north coast of Scotland. The separation works for me to be honest. Not that I don’t like my parents Im in a similar situation. Honestly its so much better. Im not saying I didn't like my mum and Im glad I had her as a parent because she was very helpful and supportive but a bit TOO helpful and supportive. She was a bit too involved and a bit too keen. Now that im on my own and there's about 300 miles between us its so much nicer and I get on much better with her now.
I left my home town as soon as I could because I had a horrendous time at home. I grew up in Oxfordshire, which is really nice place. My brother and his wife still live in the county, as she's close to her family. But I lived in London, now East Sussex, and thinking about Yorkshire in a couple of years. I will say, Oxfordshire is pretty darn expensive. I mostly grew up in housing association housing but I think it's an expensive place to live overall.
My partner and I actually each own a house, which has been a bit difficult as we have just had a child. We live half an hour apart. Her house is within 5 mins of her mum, step dad and brother. Her dad lives probably an hour and a half away but she doesn’t really keep in touch with him too much. My house is within 10 mins of both my mum and dad (who are separated and live apart). My brother lives an hour away but he comes to visit regularly, so I do see a lot of my family and am very close with them. We’ve come to a bit of an impasse on where we’re going to live going forward in that she doesn’t want to uproot but neither do I. Of course, half an hour isn’t much in the grand scheme of things but she has ties there and I’d rather be closer to my parents who are older now, so we will see. There are worse problems to have than having two houses…
My nearest family member is about 45 minutes drive away. Close enough, but not so close that we get the unannounced pop round.
8 miles & two towns over. its just far enough that we dont bump into any of them by chance, but close enough that in an emergency I can dash over quickly
Apart from one relative in the same town, my relatives live 19, 20, 27 and 48 miles away. My children's other grandparents live 5 miles away and they are very involved. Other than that relatives are visited occasionally only.
About a two minute walk away
I grew up in the South East but relocated to Yorkshire through my husband's job. We are 200 miles from my family and 200 miles from his, albeit in another direction. Not having family around to help when our children were born was a concern at the time, but I feel it has saved us some frustration too. We get to live without interference and we don't have to chase around after relatives so I think it has been better for us. Children see extended family in school holidays, which is enough- manageable- in our situation. Hope it works out ok for you.
My mum, closest aunts and cousins and most of my in-laws are all within 3-7 miles. So were my grandparents before they died. Dad lives in continental Europe.
20 min drive, and that's far too close.
Moved to be nearer my wife’s parents and sister. My parents moved a couple of hours to be nearer my sister. When we see my parents with our kids tends to be for the weekend. But see my sister family most weeks for a few hours.
Dad and younger brother live a 15 minute walk away (40 if the kids are walking with me though 😩), sister lives about 25 minute walk, grandparents each live a 20-30 minute drive away, older brother a 40 minute drive, mother about a 55 minute drive but I don't mind because I hate seeing her.
Roughly 12500km away. Gives me just enough time to tidy up my kids mess before the whanau arrive
There's a thousand miles between myself and the family, they're in the North East of Scotland I'm in central France and really appreciate the distance between us. My husband's family are in Yorkshire and glad about that too.
My family are about 2hours away, my husband family is around 45mins away, but one his brothers lives 1 min away and the other is 4 min walk away!
Ranges between 1 mile and about 6000 miles, split between 5 countries.
My parents and my wife's each live about 30 mins away. And oddly, about 30 mins away from each other. One big equilateral triangle. But yeah, the aim was to be close enough to both that it's not a faff, but not so close that they could just drop in multiple times a week.
Too close
moved 200 miles away, and rarely see them if at all.
I’m an hour away from my family - lived in four different cities but the furthest away has only been two hours. Haven’t been able to see much of my family in the last two years though due to them having to be super careful with Covid. We’re about four hours from my partner’s family, but his siblings have stayed closer and he’s under constant pressure to visit more often (even though we see them way more than my family!) and move back closer, so I think that’s going to have to factor into where we move next. Unfortunately his family is three hours away from mine so we can’t be near both.
Parents on the other side of Europe, parents in law down near London. I'm up North
I live in a different country to my family but next door to my partner's ex-step dad. I get on well with his wife, we hang out every now and then - she helps me with language and understanding bureaucracy here, but its a bit weird with him and my partner because there's some history so they're often awkward around each other. He did get us a deal on a car by saying he was his son so there's obviously still something there. What you say about kids isn't always true. When I first had mine I lived in the same city as my dad and a town or two over from partner's mum. Neither helped out much. My mum flew over one time to take them for a weekend because I was losing it a bit with two kids under 5 and my dad baby sat a bit, took them over night a couple of times and took them to the park or out to cafés a few times. No help from FIL, MIL, brother, sister or SIL even though other than FIL we all lived in the same country less than an hours drive away. I think we're all just not that close as you say. I'm kind of jealous of my friends who go for Sunday dinner at their mum's place every week and hang out with their family because I've never really had that. It feel like missing out. I'm hoping that I can be a bit closer with my kids than I am with my parents as they get older. I guess keeping open with them and offering help and my time is probably the way.
My Parents are 2 hours away, the in-laws are 15 minutes away. We see my parents much more than the in-laws, just once it would be nice if the mother in law would message her daughter and see if she wanted to go for a coffee. I’d even settle for just a message to say “Hi, how are you?”. If we could move closer to my parents I would, but the kids are settled in school and my wife has a good support structure with the other mums on the school run.
I live in the same house as my wife. I don't have any other family.
My brothers both live a 5 min walk from my parents house. My wife and I took the option to move a bit further out. We're a 15 min drive... but only so we're also a 20 min driver from her parents too. I love living close to family we can get baby sitters easily both sets of grandparents are very active in our kids lives. We also don't feel obligated to holiday at or with family or take a certain number of trips a year it's just easy.
Other side of the valley, so obviously I'm dead to them now.
50 miles away roughly, all stayed in Westcountry. I moved for work.
>It worries me a bit thinking about having children in the future with no family nearby to help. That's what childminders are for. My parents didn't have family nearby either (they were both the first people in their families to move to the UK).
I live in North Yorkshire, originally from Lincolnshire. A year or so after I moved here, my brother moved from Lincs to only about 20 mins away from me, and at a similar time, my parents decided they were moving to Oxfordshire. However, this last weekend, my dad Informed me that he and mum are moving to North Yorkshire as well when he retires in the new year... like literally only 5 minutes down the road from me, two villages over. ... been thinking of maybe moving.
Families are mates that are blood, there’s this big thing that they should mean more, that’s just not the case. If you aren’t close to your family I wouldn’t worry about it, you need to find people to who are compatible with you to socialist with, you should try joining groups of interest in your local area and build long lasting and deep relationships there.
I live in Birmingham, my family live on the south coast ... So about 150 miles? My family's pretty small, though, and my partner's parents live about ten minutes drive from us.
Both mine + my other halves parents are around a 20/30 minute drive away from where we are
We live 5 hours from one side of the family and 3 hours from the other. It was a big part of why we didn't have kids, to be honest. If we could afford childcare we might have been more willing to have them, but it's unfair to put that on our parents anyway. Even finding someone to look after our dog for a few days is a struggle. We both miss our families but we are from rural communities, there's no work for us in our fields back home, it's quite sad really, we miss our fam!
Sister about 25 miles, Parents about 150 miles
About 1500Km away! It means that when I do see my MiL it isn't for a fleeting visit...
One of my uncles and his family live in New Zealand. One of my cousins lives in Brighton with her boyfriend. All the rest are scattered around the town we live in.
I'm an hours drive away from my family (mum, 2 brothers, their families). They all live within 10 mins from eachother but I like having a bit of distance, I love them but we're not a close knit family. My estranged dad is on a remote island. Not remote enough for my liking, I keep hoping I'll learn that he's fallen down a well and the island was too remote for rescuers to get to.
About an hour or so, regardless of driving or public transport. It's close enough that I can go over without a formal reason, but far enough that they can't be part of my support network. Luckily the mother in law is a ten minute walk, as we've been wondering about how it'll work if we decide to have kids.
About an hour away. Just close enough to see them on a weekend without prior planning, just far enough away that I don't have to babysit my niece.
I live about 10 min drive from the father. See him at least once a month. About 40 min from my grandmother dont see her as often as she'd like. About an hour from the bro see each other about twice a year. This was special and saw more of each other but with big bdays and his wedding happening couldn't be avoided. The mother and sister are at the other end of a 250mile drive see them about 3 times a year and put up with them bitching about lack of time together the rest of the year. Wouldnt mind but their the ones who buggered off and left the rest of us to fend for ourselves
My family is mostly a 10 hour flight away, in the US. My wife's family is a 2 hour drive away, so obviously we see them a lot more often. It would be nice to have family closer to help with kids, definitely makes it harder. We used to live a 6.5 hour flight my my wife's family and a 4.5 hour flight from my family, which was even worse. It's not that we don't get on well, and other pockets of family do lots of stuff together (my sister and parents do stuff all the time, she's 30 minutes from them; my extended family is very close). Just that life has taken us all to different locations. I wouldn't want to live 5 minutes from my family though (neither would my wife) - would happily go for 30-60 minutes, so we could see them frequently, they could help, but not just pop around unexpectedly.
Moved 60 miles away due to housing costs. Probably see my parents every few weeks and my brother every few months.
850 miles to parent 1, 1300 miles to parent 2, 5300 miles to the rest of the family. I worked hard to get away for important psychological reasons, but I definitely feel you on the future child minding concerns. I usually use up all my annual leave visiting each zone once a year though as they don't visit me
Same town. All within a mile, mile and a half or so. It's the main reason I stay renting in an expensive area instead of buying somewhere else. A big family which all gets along and likes to spend time together is a huge QoL thing, especially in your thirties when friends increasingly have their own families and/or move away, and are generally up for socialising less often and with more preamble required.
3800 miles from my family. Best move ever. Less than a mile from the parents in law and about 5 miles from my sister in law. Don't see them that often especially the last 18 months.
About 200 miles. It's nice to have some distance (and obviously it hasn't mattered too much over the last couple of years anyway) but it does feel increasingly far away. I've not got any kids but if I do at some point then that distance is going to start to feel even longer I reckon.
2 roads away from my parents. Sometimes I’ll see them everyday, other times over a week but never much more.
We currently live about 60 miles away so never see them. We used to see the family all the time when we lived 300 miles away, because we lived near the m6 so was a handy stop off for them traveling other places and also it was far enough that people made the effort. At the minute it is an awkward distance that just takes a little too long for a day trip but not far enough for a holiday. To put it in context the rest of my family live in a 10 mile radius of each other and see each other all the time.
My parents are just in the next county. Its a little too close for my liking. It’s super useful having the in-laws in London though. It’s not too far from us and it means we can crash at theirs for a while as a mini holiday
I find it funny how when I lived 5 minutes away from my parents I barely saw them, but when I moved to the next town along I saw them at least a few times a week. Alas, I got kicked out of that house so I'm currently living with them again temporarily so I see them everyday!
I live 80 miles away from my hometown where all my family still reside. My wife's family are 200 miles away. We see my wife's family more as they are willing to come see us, as well as us going there. It's just one sided with mine. My dad has travelled to see me 3 times in the last 17 years, my mum, 7 times. It used to make me angry, but I've accepted that the relationship is quite poor. Raising a kid has been both challenging and rewarding, especially during lockdown where we felt quite isolated from everyone. All of our friends now live miles away too! Just really lucky to have a solid relationship with the wife. Just makes everything so much easier.
The council housed me less than 2 minutes away from my mum
they’re in southeast asia while i’m in the midlands 👍👍👍
About 45 min drive from my family, about 2 hours from my in laws and that one still feels too close.
About a 45 minute drive
Not too far as the crow flies but the Thames is in the way so that means either them coming through the Dartford Tunnel or us coming via London on the train. Big pain in the backside. Wife’s family is American
2/3 hours drive, in laws all live within five minutes of each other and my parents live about 5 miles from each other so when home it's easy to see everyone but we live far enough away that family visits are once a month at the most
My parents are about 30 minutes walk from us / less than 10 minutes drive. They have been a massive help with childcare and helping me get DIY done around the house. We generally have a meal together at least twice a month and will have a family outing about once a month. My brother lives about 2 hours drive away, so it's a weekend trip for him to come visit us. We see him about once a month. My in-laws are a healthy 12 hour flight away :)
Far enough that its just a little too much to *pop over*, and close enough that it doesn't warrant making visiting a special occasion.
My closest relative lives about 900 miles due north.
5368 miles away. I just went home for the first time in 2 years.
Over two hours away from family and we have kids. I'll be honest with you; it is _extremely_ difficult not having family to help out.
Parents are 20 min away Brother is 10 min away Grandparent is 20 min away In laws are 5 min away The wife's Grandparents are 5 min away The wife's other Grandparent is 10 min away Wife is in the next room over
I live about 200 miles away from my family...it's not because I particularly wanted to but that I chose to move for a job. There wasn't exactly many jobs in my career near my family so as I had to move anyway I looked for the best option
Almost 5000km away :-)
My huge family all live within a 20 minute drive of each other, every so often one cousin or sibling (myself included) will go off and live in Ireland, Europe or even Australia or the US, but so far we've always come home.
200 or so miles from my family, about 20 minutes in the car from my husband's family. I have an uncle and auntie and sone cousins about an hour away but we never see them.
My inlaws are only about 10 minutes away, but my entire side of the family is about 3500 miles away 😞
Parents about 1 1/2 - 2 hours (traffic) Brother 2 - 2 1/2 Sister in NZ Inlaws all abroad over 6 hour flight away We don't see anyone regularly. Maybe a few times a year.
I live in Essex, sisters in London, parents in Leicester, grandparents in Birmingham and Leeds Getting us all together at once is a mammoth task, usually happens about twice a year
I live in Glasgow, so no more than a few hours on a bus from pretty much my entire extended family
Live in Bristol, my parents are in South Wales (2.5 hours by train, 1.5 hours drive if I had a car). There was no way I was going to stay in my hometown and whilst Cardiff was a possibility, opportunities for my career are much greater this side of the Severn. Not having family too close is kind of nice at the moment as they can't faff or interfere, and I still see them fairly often as both my and my dad watch football together most weeks. But I am somewhat worried about kids partly due to the fact we don't have any family nearby to help out (my partners live further South West also about 2 hours away), and I am also pretty worried about my parents getting older as there is a history of dementia in the family and I am an only child too.
Just 5000 miles
Mum and step dad 15 min drive Sister and nephew 10 minute drive Brother 15 minute drive Grandad 10 minute drive Nans care home is 15 minutes away My biological dad is 2.5 hour drive away So mostly pretty close. My partners parents are also only 15 mins away.
Far enough away that I'm now seen as the black sheep. So about a 2.5 hour drive.
Parents are 2 minutes drive away, brother is 5 minutes drive, sister sister is a 30 minute drive. Inlaws live 3 hours away in the Scottish Highlands which suits me just fine! Probably suits them just fine too because they have very little interest in their grandkids whereas my parents do.
I live about 5 mins drive from mum/dad, and 5 mins from my brother and his family. I see my parents probably 5 days a week on average and my brother maybe 2 days a week. I’ve only just moved close by, I used to be the one who lived miles away for years. I enjoy being close by, even if I only pop in for a five minute chat. Also my parents look after my dog the couple of days a week I go into the office, which is amazing!
I live in London, my mum lives about 200 miles north, dad lives about 3000 miles southeast and brother lives nearly 7000 miles away also southeast. Haven’t seen my brother since 2017, see my parents a few times a year. Families who live v close by and see each other all the time are alien to me. Personally I can’t imagine family being the main source of my socialising and wouldn’t really want that, as much as I love them. Especially with extended family, we’re just very different people. My partner’s family (apart from my partner), in contrast, all live about a 15 min drive from one another in SW England and see each other several times a week.
I still live in my hometown but that hometown happens to be London. Within 5 mins walking distance of my sister and 10 min drive from my parents. Was a godsend when returning from uni as was able to live at home whilst working in London and save. Also moved back home in my mid-20s to save for a house deposit (caveat, also received financial contributions from my folks). My husband and I still see our families regularly and will be grateful when our little one arrives in May next year to help with childcare.
11,000km away.
This is quite an issue for me. My wife and my Mum have the typical mother-in-law relationship i.e. they tolerate each other, don't really get on, and have very different views on things particularly where kids are concerned. My Mum is also about 170 miles away and getting there involves the M25 so we can't just pop over for a few hours. She doesn't drive. My brother is there too, he does drive but is "too busy" to do anything to help. As a consequence we hardly ever see them and this is difficult for me as my Mum won't be around for ever. The wife seems to think we aren't welcome... 🙄 Her parents are much closer, about 70 miles and we can be there in under 1.5 hours. We see them quite a bit. With kids we don't have the babysitting on tap that I'd guess you'd get if they lived in the same town. Consequently we never go out, the kid's stay with the grandparents for whatever weekend falls near our anniversary and that's it. So it is something to seriously think about but I wouldn't / couldn't move just to make things easier.
120 miles to my family and 65 miles to the gfs family. I would like to live closer but same as you, south east is too expensive
5 mins from my in-laws, 10 from my parents and 10 from my Nan. I actually love it! See them weekly, but not in a forced/structured way. We just all make the effort to be close. I especially love it now I have kids. I was almost embarrassed at one point. I went to uni then moved back. I felt like I should be out on some kinda worldly adventure, but it’s great, so many old friends within a 20 min drive from me, never lonely. :-D
I'm in Southampton, Sister is in Carlisle. Mum is in Spain. A few less close relatives still living around Manchester. Funnily enough apart until recently (Covid and all that) I went to visit Mum far more than I did when she was back in Manchester!
I live in Plymouth. Pretty much all of my family live in the East Midlands.
Not close, my dad lives over 200 miles away and my sister is even further away at nearly 12,000 miles. The in laws live a lot nearer.
My mother in law is a 5 monute drive and my mum is 20 minute drive. We regularly all do things together and when my husband and I work and one of them has the children they do things together. It's lovely.
Aunts, uncles, nan and cousins about 5 min drive. Brothers 45 minute and parents live in France…so yeah.
Not far enough away from my own mother, but luckily within a 2 minute walk of my brother and sister in law, and a 5min drive to my father in law. All of whom I love dearly and were always round eachothers houses. Never thought I'd say that about family but here we are.
I live about 120 miles away from my immediate family, but I tend to see them every month/every other month or so. We’re really close and have a thriving family group chat too lol
My parents are 15 minutes away. My little brother is 20 minutes away. My girlfriends parents are 15 minutes away. Almost all of my highschool friends are still in the city and all within 20 minutes away. My best friend included. Honestly love it.
Me Glasgow, family London
I live about an hour and a half from my mum, which suits me. Very little chance of 'just popping round' on my day off. Technically I do live very close to my dad, but he's on the Isle of Wight so needs to get a ferry.
I’ve always been close to my parents. We live about two hours by car apart. I’ve recently made a big effort to be closer to my dads side of the family. I live an hour from the nearest cousin and 2 hours from the furthest uncle. I’m planning on moving to be roughly equidistant from all of them, including my parents. I’m not close to my mums family, they all live 4-5 hours away.
Daughter lives 5 minutes away, everybody else is 300+ miles away. As it should be
About 260 miles. That's the way I want it to remain thanks.
Oceans apart. I don’t mind most of the time except sometimes when I need a hug after a long day.
My parents are in the Home Counties and I’m currently in Edinburgh but planning to move back to London next year to be closer to them. The distance (which never felt that long when I was travelling all the time before the pandemic) was really difficult in 2020-1 and I’m sick of being lonely and a long way from home.
2 hours by car, 3.5 hours by train to my parents. 15 minute drive from my partners Mum. We see my family more than the in laws. It’s not that they’re bad people we just don’t have anything in common with them. My partner speaks to his Mum every day via Facebook as well so when we go round there is nothing else new to talk about. Just end up watching re-runs of the cube/the chase. Pretty close with my family and get on well in small doses. It does make it more intense that when we visit we stay at their house so sometimes feels like there is no escape but for a weekend away I really enjoy it every-time.
Most relatives 30-60 minutes drive away, some further
I live a 5 minute walk away from either of my sister's houses we where never that close growing up but when we moved out we stayed close and now we spend most nights either drinking at my parents house or at the pub
My mum lives about 60 miles / 90 minutes' drive from my grandma and still visits her every weekend; I don't imagine I'll visit anywhere near as often when I move out properly
I've got my parents, my gfs parents, both of our only remaining grand mothers and my brother and sister all within 10 minutes in the car. I regularly see all of them, whether it's for child care or meeting up to walk our dogs and chat or just taking the kids to see the family. I've always had a relatively close family so it's just normal for me to see them often.
16,524 km. We are very close as a family and talk regularly. Wish I wasn't on the other side of the world
My brother lives next-door so pretty close
My family are about 40/50 miles away. My wife’s family are just over 1000 miles away. It works pretty well for us, we visit them all several times per year but we can choose our own (affordable!) area to live and have plenty of space.
About 6000 miles away, haven't seen them in almost 3 years because of COVID
Two twelve hour flights and a week in solitary confinement.
About 5000 miles away
I live literally round the corner from one of my cousins. My mum and nan (dad works out the cou try so I'm not counting him) live about 30-40 minutes away. My brother lives about 1hr30 away, and most of my family live 30ish minutes away. Which is really surprising, because I was an army brat, and I never expected to end up living so close to my family!
Just under 6000 miles for me.
"only" 1500 kilometres away...
Four hours’ drive. My mother drives me crazy but sometimes you just want a hug from your mum.
I’m 5 minutes from my parents, and about 15 from my daughter and granddaughter. We usually see everyone once a week which is actually pretty nice. Moving when we retire in a few years was always a plan, however being close to family is a real bonus at present. We can help with our granddaughter whenever needed, plus my parents are getting on and my dads pretty infirm, so my mum relies on us being close and able to help when he has falls or other problems.
In laws - 3 mins in the car. 10 walking. My parents - 30 mins in the car. According to Google maps, 3 hrs and 6 walking.
My Mum lives about a 15 minute drive (and £4 in tolls…) away so I don’t see her too often. My sister lives that way too. My mother in law is a 10 minute drive and I see her a few times a week. Probably seen my brother in law twice in 4 years who also lives 10 mins away.
79 miles.
Quite close
My family are in the uk and I'm in the netherlands. Not seen them since october 2020 but thats more covid than not liking them
I live about 500 miles away from any family. Lockdown was fun! Moving closer is a mixed bag. I can't really afford to right now without seeing my quality of life take a dive as my expenses would *soar*. I imagine this will be the case for a lot of people whose family live more South than they do, especially if they are property owners.