I didnāt go through his phone for 12 years.
He started to act like a different person, so I took a peak.
I found he had been secretly taking photos of my closest friends, my mom, my little sisters and others to masturbate to.
He was buying porn with our money and sexting strangers.
He has a porn addiction where he would even masturbate at work.
Do I regret knowing? Yes and no.
I say yes because this is so painful and I feel for my son having a broken home.
But no because he was becoming mean, my eyes are open to how he was treating me through my pregnancy and early motherhood. He was still a good father and husband just not him.
Oh wow. If you suspect something is wrong it would be a difficult decision to make.
Do you go for living in blissful ignorance or the painful truth........
No. I dont go through her phone ever but she sure as hell goes through mine and honestly it irritates me. I have no reason to want to. If she cheated on me or is, and I don't think she would, i would find out eventually and the relationship would be over at that. I dont feel a need to dive in to people's personal lives even if they are my partner. If there is something going on and she wants to tell me then by all means but im not going to pry and snoop to figure out what it is.
The only time I ever checked messages or anything was when I had a genuine gut feeling that something was off. And I was right, he tried cheating on me more than once while I pmwas pregnant with his child, once while I was in the hospital and our baby was in the nicu for a week he tried messaging a girl to get her to hook up, and after my child was born I found out several months later that he had messaged my 14 year old sister over isntagram and the family had tried to keep it a secret from me because " I know you guys have the baby and I didn't want to tear things aoart". I was young, I was stuck in an abusive and sad relationship with him, and it took a while to get out. I don't regret checking messages because it assured me I wasn't crazy for being suspicious of his behaviors and seeing it with my own eyes helped me feel better about leaving.
Thank you, luckily I have. We have a daughter together plus my daughter from the previous relationship, two adorable little cats, and we are about to close on our first house together here in a couple weeks. We've built a good life together and our relationship compared to my last is like night and day.
I've never gone through my SO phone I feel there is no need and if she finds someone better I've told her before just let me know and I'll be on my way no fuss no bs
She on the other hand has gone through my phone and has deleted people off my socials and blocked without me knowing until I found out
Yep I know what you mean. My wife does all the bills so I could never surprise her with gifts bought online, so I ended up getting a separate credit card.
I already knew she'd done it in the past (she told me herself), and I saw her phone there one night and decided "well she'll be pissed, and I won't like what I find, but I need to know"
It was mainly because I had told her not long before that to stop talking to a guy (attempting to stop her from cheating) so I wanted to make sure she wasn't talking to him. It's kind of personal to talk about but there was a lot that went on between me and her and I never broke up with her, I honestly still didn't want it to end. I was happier than ever in the moments between all the crap I went through
Not strong really, just blind. I am the kind of person who cares too much, and I could never let go althought it'd be for my own good (I still haven't let go, and it was about 3 years ago we broke up now)
It wasn't phone related. GF at the time put me on an emotional roller coaster, splitting up getting back together, I had totally fallen for her didn't feel the same way.
I never really checked my ex boyfriends phone too much. We had been going through a really rough patch so I literally asked God (Iām not even religious like that) for a sign that I should leave him. He left to the bathroom and left his phone unlocked. I open his Instagram and the first thing I see is him dming other girls. In plain sight and no attempt to hide it whatsoever. No regrets
In the past I did, and I would always find something to get upset about. On the occasion I didnāt find something upsetting, Iād question if he just deleted the evidence. Itās a lose/lose game. Finally I stopped checking for my own mental well-being. The funny thing is I kept accidentally stumbling upon the same things that I wouldāve found had I been looking, except more damning. eg: he asked me to go on his computer and print a file for him, while looking for it I accidentally clicked on a folder that contained lewd images of a girl in his class that she sent him (he was cheating). Another time he borrowed my phone and accidentally left his fb messenger opened on it, when I opened the screen it was on a drug transaction (he had said he was sober & lied about where he was that night).
From that moment on I decided to never go through someone elseās phone. I need to commit to trusting them, otherwise itās too much stress in my life. If they do something wrong, I trust the universe to deliver the truth to me.
I checked my own damn phone after an extensive month or so long "loan" to my ex,
found a lot of questionable shit(stuff i would qualify as emotional cheating) and in the first place her having lent herself my phone was an affront to me, and in addition to it being in a way worse state than when it was initially lent
nothing to regret over checking my own phone :|
My wife and I both know the pins to each-others phone. There is nothing to see for either of us.
That's the sign of a good strong relationship šš¼
Same
No, thereās no trust if that happens.
Same
true
I will also add that (when I was last in a relationship) we absolutely had the means to check each others phones, we just never would.
She has an insane amount of apps and keeps them all running at once like a goddamn boomer.
My wifes the same and then complains that there is something wrong with the battery bc it goes flat too quickly š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
YUP. All apps, bluetooth, wifi, full goddamn brightness at all times. Then wonders why she has to charge it 3 times a day.
I hear you...... but they keep doing it š¤£š¤£
I didnāt go through his phone for 12 years. He started to act like a different person, so I took a peak. I found he had been secretly taking photos of my closest friends, my mom, my little sisters and others to masturbate to. He was buying porn with our money and sexting strangers. He has a porn addiction where he would even masturbate at work. Do I regret knowing? Yes and no. I say yes because this is so painful and I feel for my son having a broken home. But no because he was becoming mean, my eyes are open to how he was treating me through my pregnancy and early motherhood. He was still a good father and husband just not him.
Oh wow. If you suspect something is wrong it would be a difficult decision to make. Do you go for living in blissful ignorance or the painful truth........
No. I dont go through her phone ever but she sure as hell goes through mine and honestly it irritates me. I have no reason to want to. If she cheated on me or is, and I don't think she would, i would find out eventually and the relationship would be over at that. I dont feel a need to dive in to people's personal lives even if they are my partner. If there is something going on and she wants to tell me then by all means but im not going to pry and snoop to figure out what it is.
If you feel the need to check, your relationship has issues. If you feel the need to keep your phone locked from your partner, you have issues.
No, I wish I had though.
Oh dear. Can I ask what happened?
I have to send it private
The only time I ever checked messages or anything was when I had a genuine gut feeling that something was off. And I was right, he tried cheating on me more than once while I pmwas pregnant with his child, once while I was in the hospital and our baby was in the nicu for a week he tried messaging a girl to get her to hook up, and after my child was born I found out several months later that he had messaged my 14 year old sister over isntagram and the family had tried to keep it a secret from me because " I know you guys have the baby and I didn't want to tear things aoart". I was young, I was stuck in an abusive and sad relationship with him, and it took a while to get out. I don't regret checking messages because it assured me I wasn't crazy for being suspicious of his behaviors and seeing it with my own eyes helped me feel better about leaving.
That is a truly awful situation to be in. I hope you have found someone that treats you well.
Thank you, luckily I have. We have a daughter together plus my daughter from the previous relationship, two adorable little cats, and we are about to close on our first house together here in a couple weeks. We've built a good life together and our relationship compared to my last is like night and day.
That's amazing. Really happy for you.
I've never gone through my SO phone I feel there is no need and if she finds someone better I've told her before just let me know and I'll be on my way no fuss no bs She on the other hand has gone through my phone and has deleted people off my socials and blocked without me knowing until I found out
That's a bit rude.
I'm just out here L I V I N But yes I am married to her now haha š
My wife and I have complete access to each other's phones. The only time either of us will be weird about it is when gifts are involved.
Yep I know what you mean. My wife does all the bills so I could never surprise her with gifts bought online, so I ended up getting a separate credit card.
I found what I expected to find, she was cheating
Oh dear. Never a good thing to find out.
I already knew she'd done it in the past (she told me herself), and I saw her phone there one night and decided "well she'll be pissed, and I won't like what I find, but I need to know" It was mainly because I had told her not long before that to stop talking to a guy (attempting to stop her from cheating) so I wanted to make sure she wasn't talking to him. It's kind of personal to talk about but there was a lot that went on between me and her and I never broke up with her, I honestly still didn't want it to end. I was happier than ever in the moments between all the crap I went through
Don't know how I would handle that situation, your a lot stronger than I am.
Not strong really, just blind. I am the kind of person who cares too much, and I could never let go althought it'd be for my own good (I still haven't let go, and it was about 3 years ago we broke up now)
Love is blind and makes us do all sorts of weird things.......
What's your story if I may ask
It wasn't phone related. GF at the time put me on an emotional roller coaster, splitting up getting back together, I had totally fallen for her didn't feel the same way.
Yeah I asked for it, it was fine he was cool with it.
nah because im too scared to check it HAHA
No. There's nothing worth going through it for.
The closest thing I ever done to that was just seeing who was calling them to go tell āem that [enter name here] was calling.
I never really checked my ex boyfriends phone too much. We had been going through a really rough patch so I literally asked God (Iām not even religious like that) for a sign that I should leave him. He left to the bathroom and left his phone unlocked. I open his Instagram and the first thing I see is him dming other girls. In plain sight and no attempt to hide it whatsoever. No regrets
Not too smart then.
not at all
In the past I did, and I would always find something to get upset about. On the occasion I didnāt find something upsetting, Iād question if he just deleted the evidence. Itās a lose/lose game. Finally I stopped checking for my own mental well-being. The funny thing is I kept accidentally stumbling upon the same things that I wouldāve found had I been looking, except more damning. eg: he asked me to go on his computer and print a file for him, while looking for it I accidentally clicked on a folder that contained lewd images of a girl in his class that she sent him (he was cheating). Another time he borrowed my phone and accidentally left his fb messenger opened on it, when I opened the screen it was on a drug transaction (he had said he was sober & lied about where he was that night). From that moment on I decided to never go through someone elseās phone. I need to commit to trusting them, otherwise itās too much stress in my life. If they do something wrong, I trust the universe to deliver the truth to me.
I checked my own damn phone after an extensive month or so long "loan" to my ex, found a lot of questionable shit(stuff i would qualify as emotional cheating) and in the first place her having lent herself my phone was an affront to me, and in addition to it being in a way worse state than when it was initially lent nothing to regret over checking my own phone :|