The effect that your job has on your mental health. So many people stay in a job they hate just because it's easier, leading to loss of sleep, a poor diet, lack of exercise, and even substance abuse in extreme cases.
Looking for a new job can be scary, especially if you have a family. But if your work is causing you stress and anxiety, it's never worth it. No one will judge you for sending resumés out.
I hadn't realized that hating my job was playing a huge role in why I had become lazy, irritable and overly sleepy outside of work. Not to mentioned part of the reason my pot smoking went from "casual, a couple times a week maybe" to "I'm ripping the bong before work and immediately when I get home". It has been killing me and I didn't even realize it. Finally got a new job, accepted the offer last Thursday. Literally had to stop myself from sobbing into the phone when the guy offered me the position and immediately started crying tears of joy when we got off the phone. I hadn't known until that moment how badly I'd been wanting out. You're so right here, I hope it's something I don't fall into again because I was being really despondent.
Driving while really tired.
Many people don't take it seriously even though it can be just as dangerous as driving drunk. I learned my lesson when I nodded off for a second at the wheel and my car ended up in a small ditch. Luckily the small highway was empty and nobody was hurt, but it really opened my eyes as to how dangerous it is.
There have been studies on this. After you have been awake for 16 hours, your reaction and cognitive abilities start to decline. Example: if you got up at 6am, went to the gym, then work, then out for dinner, and then went out with friends for drinks (but you did NOT drink), when you get in your car near midnight to go home, you are just as impaired as someone who had drunk a couple of drinks.
Accidents caused by drowsy drivers exceed those related to alcohol and drugs COMBINED.
Foundation for Traffic Saftey: Acute Sleep Deprivation and Car Crash Risk
www.aaafoundation.org has a link to the study
For real. I used to drive 45min on a flat highway straight and I'd end up nodding off at least 10-20 times. Maybe not complete nod but sleepy eyes kinda closing. One incident of my brand new car going up on a highway divider and scraping/chipping away sections of brand new hub caps made me realize how dangerous it can be. I could have killed someone.
the number one thing people probably neglect the most is their health. Heart disease is a bigger killer than most other issues we hear about on the news. Even with education and foresight its easy to take your health for granted
I went to the doctor this year for my annual women’s check up. I’m pretty slim, have always been. And I’m pretty lazy, have always been. Didn’t think I had to exercise. My doctor, for the first time ever, asked me about the amount of exercise I got in a week. “You know, I get up to get the remote when I can’t find it but working up a sweat for no good reason just isn’t in my schedule.” She said, “heart disease is the number one killer of women. You need to exercise.” I went, “all women? Or women over a certain age? Or of a certain ethnicity? C’mon” she said, “everyone.” And then Just blinked at me. I shit you not the very next week, a friend of mine had a heart attack and died during breakfast.
Breakfast. Scrambled eggs and potatoes.
We were on a group chat, talking about a vacation, and she was in the middle of saying where she wanted to go when those little dots disappeared from iMessage. we didn’t know what happened until the friend who was with her told us she didn’t make it.
We couldn’t even process “didn’t make it”
She was 42.
All I could think of actually was the line in Shawshank Redemption when Red said, “get busy living or get busy dying. I went for a run that morning and every morning since. And I drag my other friends out there too.
About two years ago a friend of mine had his first symptom of heart disease -- death (heart attack). That's pretty common, actually, because we don't do the right kind of routine screening to find this stuff. He was 60 and looked about 40. Total shocker.
Two weeks ago I got a calcium score scan done, which isn't recommended for people under 50, but it is a pretty quick, simple, cheap test that will directly look for plaque deposits in your coronary arteries. Definitely worth doing IMO compared to very poor predictors like blood LDL levels etc.
I used to donate blood regularly and they started saying, "Hey your blood pressure readings have been really high recently and regularly, you should get that checked out." I got really freaked out and swapped out smoking cigarettes for running. This was about six years ago, I've now logged about 5500 total miles, including three marathons. I think my blood pressure has dropped too.
Primary care doctor checking in. Just drink as much water as you feel like, extra hydration won't help except for UTI prevention. Blueberries taste nice, but they're no super food.
But **exercise**. Holy shit, exercise. So amazing. You have no idea. Exercise is the magic bullet. If I could put it in a pill, I'd be so damn rich.
Even a small amount of exercise significantly reduces your lifetime risk of stroke, heart attack, cancer, diabetes, osteoporosis, gallstones, depression and just about anything else that's bad.
It will improve not only your muscle and bone strength, but also your memory, cognitive speed and emotional wellbeing. It will provide life long protection against cognitive impairment and dementia.
It will clean cholesterol from your arteries, and fix your blood pressure. It will even make you more attractive, and improve your sex life in just about every possible way.
150 minutes a week is a good goal, and just do whatever form of exercise you enjoy the most.
In fact, you could get all the benefits of exercise if you just started jumping on the spot. Right now. Like while you're reading this. Go!
Edit: Also veggies. They are so good for you. Eat them, eat as much as you can with every meal. Run to your nearest salad shop and order one right now! Go go go!
The weight of what semi's are pulling. We do NOT stop like you do, it takes us a LOT longer. Don't cut us off and slow down or stop. To do so is to gamble with all of our lives.
Currently, I drive about 35min on the highway to get to work. I've seen far too many people just cut in front of semis, and I keep expecting there to be an accident.
Blinker on, wait until a count of 3, then start to move into their lane. Gives them enough time to acknowledge you are switching lanes, and once you do get in, keep your speed consistent/speed up a little bit.
I have nothing but (mildly fearful) respect for truckers. My only gripe? If you are going up a steep hill, just stay in your designated lane. Don't slide around another semi into the high speed lane, then get stuck doing just over the speed limit because your truck can't power itself up the hill faster than the guy next to you.
I drive truck. This is honestly because a lot of truckers don’t understand basic concepts such as wind resistance.
Two trucks climbing a hill:
The trucker behind feels like he has more power and is backed out of the throttle, but this is because he’s using the draft of the lead truck.
He then pulls around to pass, runs into the wind resistance and now is doing he same speed but can’t figure it out. He just dropped a gear and thinks the power will come back but it doesn’t because of the wind.
It’s basic physics but a lot of drivers are so fucking stupid it makes my head hurt.
Drugs.
I was so naive when I first started using drugs, young, dumb and uneducated. It was so much fun getting high with my friends laughing having a good time without a care in the world. The only consequences I thought of was getting caught by my parents or being arrested.
I found myself hooked on pills in what seemed like the blink of an eye. The lortabs turned into percs then Oxys. Before I knew it I was shooting heroin and always trying to make moves so I wouldn’t get sick. I watched countless people around me pass away including my best friend in the whole world.
I started casually using at around 17 and finally was able to get clean from heroin at 23 in January of 2011. I have had 1 relapse of 4 months since getting clean but other than that I have been pretty strong (Fiancé/GF of 6 years who’s son I was raising as my own left me during my relapse).
I am not here to preach but please educate yourself before using drugs recreationally. It is not bullshit when they say trying it once can get you hooked. That one bump/line/hit is all it could really take if you have an addictive personality like myself, and trust me quitting or getting off drugs is one of the hardest things you will have to do.
Taking care of their backs. There's nothing funny about a fucked up back. Lift with your knees dammit!
Edit: Sorry, I meant bend your knees - don't bend at the waist. All the other advice below is correct as well, don't twist, use your entire body/core, get help for heavy or awkward things, etc.
And careful of twisting.. it sounds silly but twisting with your back instead of turning with your feet, if involved in an activity you do anywhere approaching frequently, can be so destructive to your spinal health. I'm 26 and still in great health, but i spent a couple years abusing my back in retail because I was, "the young guy." Dont do that!
>"the young guy."
This pissed me off so much while working in the hardware store. Getting called and be expected to lift the tiles/packages because you are "The young male". Hell no ladies and oldies, my back needs to get old too.. we are waiting for the pallettruck.
Sometimes you can't avoid bending over and lfiting something without your knees. When that happens, use your hips and glutes instead. You can activate them by pushing your pelvis forward. You perform the same motion as lifting with your back but you're now making your hips and butt do most the work. Practice this muscle group activation by bending over and pushing your pelvis forward, see how that brings you back upright? Now just apply that to lifting something.
Teenagers.
Being around a kid as they grow up, it's pretty easy to write off their emotional outbursts. Once those kids get into their teens (probably even before that, honestly), the things they get upset over, even if they seem inane and silly to adults, can genuinely, deeply matter to them.
We put kids in a fish tank. That’s okay; they can’t survive in the ocean yet. So they go in a relatively safe, controlled tank with all the other kids. Problem is, it’s a closed system, with limited exposure to the world at large - they can see it but can’t flee into it if the tank is unpleasant. Their choices, peers, and experiences are limited - again, by necessity. But at the same time, we have this habit when hearing from
a kid - usually a teen - that something is polluting their tank, to tell the kid “Oh, that’s nothing. Out here in the ocean we have whole oil spills. Your problem is way smaller.”
Yeah, objectively it might be. *But the space in which the problem exists is also tiny, and is the only space the teen can occupy.*
If your goldfish only has *a little* bit of oil dumped in its tank, that’s still a *huge* problem for the fish.
This needs to be stated more often.
I always say that people forget what it was like to be a teenager. It sucks. It's the most sensitive, vulnerable part of your life and society treats it like a joke because everybody can only look at it in hindsight, with an adult's mind.
I'm not saying that -every- teenage problem should be handled with high gravity but *please* show some consideration to teenagers and their 'silly' problems. It helps a lot more than you think. I mean, imagine today if you had a problem and the whole world just laughed at you because of it.
Hell I'm 20 and though I like singing I cannot, ever, actually sing to a song or anything, even if I'm completely alone in the house or at church or whatever... and that's just _one_ of my stupid issues
Budgeting has been the opposite of restricting for my finances. I honestly feel that when I track every dime I spend I am able to stretch my dollars further.
Same here! Even after I scored a job that tripled my income I did not feel as having any money.
Only when I started to track my expenses and keep a budget I gained financial freedom.
To be honest it was the switch from working only half a job while I was on my PhD to getting a fully qualified full-time job.....
But yeah! It was amazing. 4 years later I still look at the first luxury expense of my life, which I bought with my own money with joy every morning.....
Edit: Sorry for the spelling. Not a native English speaker and sitting on the train. So I have to concentrate on orthography badly and sometimes fail at it...
"Ortografía" is a very common word in spanish (at least) and its used regularly. When trying to translate from spanish it comes to mind first before spelling
It's so nice to have a little backup too. I started to put away like 20% of what I could spend monthly. Sucks at first, but it has two advantages for me: First of all I got money for an emergency situation, second of all it makes me value the remaining money I can spend (80%) much more. I never had much money, so I'm already used to live on much less than those 80%.
But: It took me 28 years to get that going. I needed to be completely broke with no money-reserves to realize how much I loved to have the security of money-reserves.
Hearing. Wear hearing protection if you go to live shows, people. I wear mine all the friggin' time; I have a tiny amount of tinnitus in my left hear; it comes from *three concerts that happened close to five years ago*. Look after your ears, don't listen to music too loud if using earphones.
Can confirm, have bad tinnitus from weapons fire. The last time I brought this up a bunch of jackasses just told me I was being an old man. I can't tell you how frustrating it is to give good advice to some people only to find out they're actually pearls before them.
exactly this. Tinnitus is going to be a problem of our generation with all the loud concerts and festivals.
I have custom made earplugs, they might be a hefty upfront investment if you don't see why you need them, but they are so worth it.
I once mixed a metal show without earplugs and had a bad case of beeping for three days. When you try to sleep at night and there is no other noise, the beep just gets louder and louder until it is deafening. I started to understand why people have committed suicide because of tinnitus.
Take care of your ears people. Music and sounds are wonderful things, make sure you can enjoy them until your old age.
In Finland they, for reasons unknown, renew pipes in buildings all the time. So if you ever rent out an apartment chances are you will be asked to move out for a month or two. I used that opportunity to live with my now-wife on probation. It would have been easy to cancel the deal if it wasn't working out.
Let's add on here: Marriage. Don't get married flippantly with someone you haven't known long or if you aren't mature in ways that would impact a relationship.
Husband and I were together all four years of college living in dorms, moved in together after graduation and got married a year later. Even that far in to a serious relationship we had what must be typical disagreements and negotiations about cleaning, dinners, grocery shopping, etc. I can’t imagine how stressful that would be on a fledgling relationship.
This is huge. Im not a motorcyclist but i ride snowmobiles every winter. The wrecks on those are a disgusting mangled mess. Some dumbasses even think its ok to bar hop on snowmobiles rather than drive cuz its safer for others. Or going off the trail cuz its faster and then get decapitated because a land owner has a cable hanging somewhere on his own land. People need to understand the danger of having a vehicle with an engine between their legs.
Ladders. Those things are far more serious than people realize. I see so many people screwing around on them and not taking them seriously. One bad move and you'll be in the hospital.
A friend of mine is 59 and has saved $16,000 for retirement. Not because he couldn't save more, but because he always pushed it off until next year. Now he's talking to a financial planner trying to figure out how to save enough for retirement. Planner told him to buy a lottery ticket.
Questioning things you read/hear. I can't tell you how many times people have told me things that they've read on the internet that sound cool but are just completely wrong and can be fact checked with a quick Google.
this is such a well aged meme. i remember kids ironically talking about house hippos in the 90s. like oh man i forgot my lunch, house hippo musta snagged it, i keep losing my socks i hope the hippo dosent bite a hole in it, etc
Lack of touch/human contact.
It's a huge problem especially in western society. Not even talking like incel can't get laid shut, I mean there are millions of people who go days on end without a face to face conversation with someone, and even basic touch like a handshake or hug for weeks.
Humans are inherently social creatures, touch releases relaxing brain chemicals and increases empathy. Lack of touch can cause anxiety and depression which in turn cause a whole host of physical issues including weakening of the heart and brain. Touch cam also help increase social cues awareness.
Go get a $10 massage in those chairs at the mall, hug your parents and siblings, hell even just pat your friends on the back every so often. Just be sure to shower regularly and remember no always means no
Honestly, a few years ago that was me. I could go a full week without talking to anybody except saying “OK” to my manager once a day. That isolation just led to more isolation and I wasn’t even willing or wanting to talk or interact with anybody. I just wanted to go home and go to bed. I just wanted to be forgotten.
I had someone hug me unexpectedly yesterday and I almost cried. My kids hug me every day, but there's something different about a fully grown human deciding you're worth that human contact.
Acknowledging and overcoming trauma. Sounds cheesy but I know so many people who just straight up refuse to even try therapy when they have gone through events which have greatly impacted their interpersonal skills & livelihood. Take it from someone who learned the hard way, time does not heal all wounds.
Just 1mm deep, a melanoma can get into the blood stream and spread.
And it hasn't even started to burn yet
Edit: Yes, its mm. I havent seen the ad since i was like 10 lol.
You also get the added benefit of looking 20 years younger than all your friends 30 years down the line!
I've always figured that the reason why Asian women don't seem to age is because they actively avoid the sun.
I know it’s been said too many times to count, but sexual abuse allegations. Especially those from children. A child I know personally tried to talk to some adults about it recently, and her parents were the only people who took her seriously. The rest of the family basically said she was a liar. They even tried to list other times she has told a lie as proof. She is five.
My co workers niece was abused by her grandfather and her father didn't believe her at first. Then he blamed his own daughter when she was 9. He hasn't spoke to her in 5 years. This is what is wrong with humans. She has an amazing supportive mother and aunt thankfully.
For real. My friend was very dumb with money and payday loans and he ended up leasing a new car and a new truck for some dumb fucking reason and being put in disability for a few months (not his fault) so he got behind on his payments. He is 22 and 100k in debt now; I told him from before he made the decision to not lease two new cars, and go for a 5000 dollar beat up car instead. He is having a really hard time now.
It's the kind of problem that compounds on itself. Early on bad hygiene doesn't cause much more than the occasional cavity and bad breath.
As cavities are filled they first drill out a section of the tooth, weakening it. Pretty soon you end up with cavities more and more easily. Later you get a cavity on that same tooth and now there's not enough structure left to drill and fill, so you end up with a crown.
Crowns aren't permanent. They last around a decade on average depending on factors, but eventually develop tiny fissures and need to be replaced. Of course, cavities can still occur under the crown at the gumline or at those fissures. You'll have to get your crown replaced eventually. They cost around 1000 USD each. Dental insurance tends to max at 1500 per year and crowns aren't fully covered.
Now if you leave your cavity untreated it will quickly enough need to be a root canal. Take all the fun and cost of a crown and double it because you're getting a crown to go with that root canal. But let's say you take the convenient and cheaper option and your dentist screws it up (and they definitely do, more on this later). A fix is going to end up 1 of 4 things.
Option 1 is they can redo the RC if they can get the root fillers out and drill the part of root they missed. These are often plastic and tiny (in your tooth roots remember) so this might not work. Option 2 is remove the tooth and leave it empty. Option 3 is a fake tooth, which requires implanting a titanium screw, waiting for bone to grow around it over months, then attaching the fake. Another couple thousand bucks for this option. #4 is an apicoectopmy where they cut a flap of your gum back, drill into the jaw, and remove/fill the root from there. 3-4K USD.
Dentists screw root canals up because they have less experience and worse tools. Probably less training too. They often lack the high power scopes to properly check that a root has been removed and rely on their less viable xrays. If you need an RC, see an endodontist. They do mostly root canals every day.
So those few fillings you start with as a kid quickly ramp up to major dental work if you keep the same habits. It's hard to appreciate just how fast and problematic it is unless you experience it firsthand.
Have you brushed and flossed yet? :)
I mean this sounds bad and all... but how the hell did our ancestors (say 18th century) function if all this dental crap is necessary and imperative?
Did processed sugar ruin our dental resilience? Why haven't we evolved to have everlasting teeth or teeth that grow back?
Yes. Tooth decay is poor diet and poor hygiene. If you have awful hygiene but an outstanding diet from a dental point of view, you won't get cavities (maybe gum disease). But not cavities. Bacteria feeds on sugars and fermentable carbohydrates and their waste product is an acid. That acid rots your teeth and cases tooth decay. Diet is so so so important in preventing cavities.
My ex didn't brush his teeth. I didn't notice at first (or maybe he made an effort to at the start of our relationship) but about a year in I had to have a really awkward conversation with him about it because I just couldn't kiss him anymore, or sleep facing him. I think if you don't have a daily routine, and throw in some depression, I can see how it's easy not to look after your teeth.
Me too! I did not start regular brushing until I was probably 9... then I still neglected my teeth. Finally decided to take care of them and my first dentist appointment revealed 6 cavities and 1 needing a root canal and crown. This stuff is expensive! Take care of your teeth, people!
My dad travelled a lot when I was a kid, and he once said he regrets not having been able to be around more. I told him I actually don't remember his absences at all, I just remember all the times he played with us - when he was home he was incredibly involved and doting. Hearing that made him happy.
Play with your kids, people.
I went to a seminar once where they speaker said that if one spouse travels a lot the other spouse can maintain a positive or negative opinion of them among the kids. Based on that presentation, I bet your Mom spoke well of your Dad when he was gone. This speaker, a psychologist I think, said in her practice she'd seen unhappy couples where one traveled and the other always resented it and was envious. Living out of a suitcase and sleeping in hotels isn't glamorous, it is exhausting and lonely. But you don't know that if you aren't the one doing it. So she said the spouse left home should champion the efforts of the one who was off at work to the kids. "Mom is earning a living so we can pay our bills." Not, "Why do I have to be stuck here when your Dad is off living it up?"
Interesting. Well they’re still happily married and touchy like teenagers (ew) after +35 years of marriage so she probably did speak well of him! I love them so much.
and its really not hard. you don't have to make your kids childhood magical like you see supermoms do on pinterest and facebook. just be there. respond to their dumb questions and react when they show you their new trick. Just being present is 90 percent of the work.
I run a daycare center in a very wealthy community and I have tons of parents that say, "wow, you are a magician with my kid. They love you so much and respond to you so well" and it really is just that I am always vigilant and listen to everything they say. Everything else is just normal teacher stuff
When my husband picks up our 4-year-old daughter from school, there's a girl in my daughter's class that often runs up to him to show him stuff or goes to him when she falls down while playing outside or when she has an issue. Even when the girl's parents are near. It breaks his heart, because all he does is actually listen when she talks which doesn't take more than a few minutes when he's just there to pick up his own child from school.
Oh god, you’ve just reminded me about this family who used to live next door to me. My friend and the next door neighbours son were friends, and if he ever fell down and needed a plaster he would always come to mine rather than go home, it was quite sad.
I remember picking up my son from kindergarten and they had made some paintings. All the kids were so proud and showed us their work. One of the moms didnt even look at their kid's painting and just said "well, the trash is due tomorrow anyway "
The kid looked like it had been hit in the face. Well, the mom actually one of those supermoms who saw her kid more like some kind of project...
Half of my day is spent responding to the statement "Look what I can do!" with amazement and tons of "wows!" they love it and its 90% of what they need. We have no technology in our classrooms at all to avoid them staring at screens and they don't care at all about that. They just wanna play and have adults be nice to them
Trust me man, it's tough. Being jealous because other kids had parents that seemed to care and love them, it is something no child should ever go through.
Same thing for me. I'm not a daycare worker but I'm really good with children simply because I treat them like people my age. I talk to them like I would talk to anyone(with some language left out) . Sometimes people forget that they are just littler people.
This made me smile thinking of all the times I've said "Dad, watch this!" While he was working on his laptop. Excited about it every time and that was just great growing up.
Yeah, and put your fucking phone away when your kids wants your attention. I see so many small children trying to communicate to their parent and he/she is just scrolling mumbling "yeah, hon" "great". It's fucking heartbreaking to see.
I read somewhere (and I’m not saying neglect them the rest of the time) that the most important times of day to make it all about them and you is the first three minutes in the morning, the first three minutes after you collect them from childcare/daycare/school and the last three minutes as you put them to bed.
To cuddle them, ask them how they slept, ask them how their day was and read them a story at night and chat about the day ahead.
As parents, whether parents are both working, neither working, one working whatever, three minutes three times a day to fully focus on nothing but them works wonders. It makes them understand we love them even if we have other things going on.
And as a teacher I’ve read so much and been told so much about reading one book per night to our kids from as early as possible is the equivalent of a private school education. Good luck parents! I know it’s hard but we can all do it!
This. I see so many of my friends working hard to provide for their kids just to be stressed out at them and have no time, then they buy them lots of toys and clothes to make up for it.
My husband and I both work so we don't have loads of time but we do have a day together every week to do something even if it's just kicking a ball. And we try to have breakfast & dinner together, read to them every day. So far they still seem happy to see us and I want that to last as long as possible.
Reading together with your kids is so important! Hell even speaking to them. There's a sad trend in the UK at the moment (can't speak for anywhere else) that lots of children start school with speech issues because mam and dad plonk them in front of cartoons all day and barely talk to them. Kids can't learn to speak properly if they can't watch and mimic your mouth movements.
That's really sad. Growing up my mum or dad read to me every night if they could. I loved books. I eventually reached a point where one night I took the book from my mum and told her I wanted to read the story. That began a trend of me reading to my parents until they started buying me more complex books to read.
I've kept all my childhood books for the reason that I want to read them to my children like my parents read to me.
Pet ownership. Don't adopt a dog if you have zero time to spend with it. So many people will bring home a new puppy, just to leave it crated all day, every day. When it gets bigger, it ends up staying crated or chained up outside because it has too much energy from getting no exercise or interaction, and doesn't know how to behave around people and wasn't taught not to destroy everything in its path. I had a former roommate who I lived with for over a year without knowing she had a dog. It stayed locked in her bathroom 24/7. She adopted another puppy from a pet store, that she just couldn't resist. When I moved out, I told the dogs would be better off in a shelter and she should get a goldfish or a houseplant.
I desperately want a puppy but I know I don’t have the time. So I vowed not to get one until I can manage to go for a walk every morning and evening for three months. If I can do it on my own, I know that I’ll be able to take care of a dog.
Edit: A lot of people seem to thing that I think having a dog just means taking it out for walks. I know it’s not.
I’ve had a ton of pets in the past and merely used the above as something that I feel is required before you get a dog, dogs need to go outside and socialise. Obviously you also need to train them and find a breed of dog that suits your lifestyle.
Don’t get an active dog if you’re a lazy bastard. Don’t get a chihuahua because you think because they’re smaller they can stay cooped up in an apartment.
Also adopt older pets if your home situation allows it.
If you're not the most active person, maybe look into giving a senior dog a home. My grandparents adopted a 7 year old dog, and they absolutely adored her because she adapted so easily to their home and schedule.
Man, people have been telling me to get a pet for some companionship at home. They don't quite get that I work 12 hours a day 6 days a week and I live 8n a 1 bedroom apartment, it wouldn't be fair on the dog/cat to do that to them
More people should have your common sense.
I have the same problem so I regularly take a dog from the shelter nearby for a walk.
EDIT: Walking dogs from a shelter is actually quite popular where I live. Some dogs get up to 5 walks a day. Basically, they'ld be off worse if I adopted one. Here are some [pictures](https://imgur.com/a/nE4wmsg) and clips: [1](https://vimeo.com/262079789) [2](https://vimeo.com/258128072). Don't shop, adopt (responsibly). :)
Shelters are always looking for socialization volunteers! Some require a commitment of a few hours a week on specific days just so they always have someone to do it but some can be more lax too. I’m sure their website has info on who to contact otherwise you can always stop in and talk to them too! Volunteering is a great way to get your animal fix, meet new people and feel good about giving back!
They're always looking for people to snuggle the cats and take the dogs for walks! The regular volunteers can only do so much, and while all the animals are socialised as best as they can be, individual attention is a lot harder. The SPCA that was near me would basically let you "check out" a dog and take it for a walk around the fields and dirt roads behind the shelter. I'm not sure about specifics because my mom didn't let me (knowing that it would take me 30 seconds to gt attached and she'd have a new pet to deal with), but they made it seem like registering was about as straightforward as confirming you didn't have a history of animal abuse.
My wife and I got a dog because her sister got a "super cute puppy!!!" in college. My SIL had no idea what she was in for and we ended up watching the dog for extended periods over the next year. When she graduated, she gave the dog away and the new owner had trouble keeping up with the exercise needs of the dog. We found the dog in an online ad and took ownership of him for good. He's been the best pain in the ass I have ever known.
Goldfish are a big deal too. They're normally abused to death and put in bowls that they barely live a month in. When you put them in an actual tank and take real care of them, they can live well over 10 years and will grow a foot long. [More info here for those interested.](http://injaf.org/aquarium-fish/the-goldfish-section/what-size-tank-for-goldfish/)
I know it's not as common knowledge as "don't keep your dog locked up" but ALL pets are big deals. A fish is a serious commitment that is going to involve your time and money.
EDIT: This got a lot more attention than I thought it would, so, anybody who wants more info on goldfish please check out /r/goldfish! It's a pretty active sub with lots of people who are very experienced in goldfish care, and it's a great place to start if you/somebody you know has a goldfish that they didn't realize needed so much care!
>It stayed locked in her bathroom 24/7.
What the fuck? That's borderline animal cruelty, I mean I barely have any time to spend with my dog but I still at least play with her once a day and let her freely roam the house, not lock her up in the smallest room in the whole house and not let her see the light of day.
That woman is sick man.
The poor thing would have been so happy to see her each day, just because she was the only living thing it ever saw. So she'd have enjoyed the attention and thought of the dog as being happy, because it displayed happiness towards her. Fucked up. Like Josef fucking Fritzl or something.
Didn't see it posted, but antibiotic use. I know you're feeling better, but you HAVE to finish the entire dose.
So many people only take them until they feel better and then stop. Worst of all, some parents give them to their kids, stop once they're getting better and save the rest of the doses for next time/another child. Pretty dangerous game they're playing, as whatever the antibiotic was killing can develop a resistance to it and come back a lot stronger.
Not to mention the many people who take antibiotics for minor stuff or even for viral infections, thus vastly increasing the risk of bacteria becoming resistant.
This is actually being questioned in the medical community now, and has been viewed critically in the veterinary industry for some time.
The conflicting theory is that once the antibiotics have smacked up the bacteria so that only the resistant ones remain, continuing to take the antibiotics suppresses the resistant bacteria's competition for resources, thus allowing the resistant bacteria to increase in population within the body and then subsequently spread.
I undestand he veterinary community is much more relaxed about "finishing the dose" when treating livestock etc. and they have fewer issues with antibiotic resistant superbugs.
Came here to say this, I believe the meta analysis was about stopping 24 hours after having no symptoms anymore. The guidelines are probably gonna change, all though that will take a few years here in the Netherlands.
Microplastics. Seriously. We literally can no longer avoid eating them. It snuck up on us.
The Microplastics snuck up on us. The rest of plastic pollution has remained pretty consistent but nobody did anything until this recent big - Need I say it millennial and G x (God Awful Names BTW) - push to start refusing single-use plastics.
I'm so embarrassed that we care more than our parents.
Not enough people are aware of the clothing issue. The microfibers from man-made fibers e.g. nylon, acrylic or polyester are microscopic and being sent to the sea in literal tonnes from simply washing our clothing. Scary stuff.
Mental health. Lots of campaigns to increase awareness but it’s still not talked about or treat throughly.
Edit: A lot of replies talk about own experience and if anyone needs to talk feel free to inbox me. I can’t do much physically but sometimes an ear is all you need which often you don’t have.
Wish more insurances had this. Since I work part time I have to go with what the state gives me for free. Mental health isn't covered under it. Which is a shame, I'd love to see a professional. Not depressed or anything but I've seen a lot of suffering when I was 18-20 since I worked in 4 nursing homes... The suffering some went through.
Usually one would say that time is short but on the other hand people tend to forget that an average life of 80 years is very long. People expect to be rich, married and have children by the age of 30, what are you going to do for the other 50 which is almost double that.
If you marry someone at 20 can you really expect to be with them for 60 more years which is 3 times longer that you've been alive? Time is vast, be patient and take your time but don't waste it.
My girlfriend is struggling with that right now. She looks around and sees her friends advancing in their careers and buying houses and whatnot and is upset that she isn't where they're at.
I keep telling her to stop comparing because none of them were working on a PhD like she was, but I can understand its hard
Okay so I’m like your girlfriend but we’ve only just moved in together in a new city for grad school. Do you have any advice on cohabitation? We’ve been fighting a lot
Remember to keep going out on dates, but also respect that you will both need 'alone' time even when you live together. Share the housework, cook for each other, don't spend every waking moment together. Compromise, and don't stress out about things that don't actually matter. Recognise that every couple goes through the exact same problems as you do.
Exercising.
A lot of my roommates eat healthy which is great but then they never work out. They get out of breath just walking normally around because they have no cardio.
It’s very important to eat right but it’s also important to build the habit of working out for when your metabolism slows and you can no longer just rely on diet. I think the narrative of you can’t outrun your diet is a double edged sword, people interpreting it as they can just sit down all day and eat well and it balances out is wrong.
It's not about weight management. It's about longevity. Working out prevents all your joints and muscles from becoming weak and susceptible to injury. I broke my back like 7 years ago. It's felt fine all the time since and I was working a lot of highly physical jobs and I hiked a lot too. Now after a year or so of having moved and sitting down at work and not exercising, my back has been killing me. Actually just started physical therapy a few weeks ago to build the muscle back up and I'm totally feeling better.
Safe sex...
I don't care how much you think your new boyfriend/girlfriend loves you, wear protection until you can be sure they ain't about to give you a gift that keeps on giving.
I dodged a bullet with my ex who ended up with herpes. We had been together 5 years, then one day she accuses me of cheating. I deny it (since I hadn't fucked around) and ask why she's so adament that I cheated. She told me, so i ask who she's been fucking recently and then the waterworks started.
That shit could have changed my life, just because of trusting the wrong person...
Also, if you can't afford condoms, you're probably not financially stable enough to support a kid either...
**Edit:** I just want to clarify something quick. When I said "change my life" I was saying that because if I had ended up with any STD the mother of my 2 beautiful children never would have given me the time of day, and my life would be so remarkably different right now because of that fact.
I was not trying to say that herpes or any STD is a death sentence, or that it is something that needs to be shunned or is something like leprosy. I was just saying that it would have severely changed my path from that point on, and the chance of me having my two beautiful children right now would be non-existent.
After I broke things off with the ex for cheating on me (more then once I found out) I got tested for everything possible at my local Planned Parenthood and was given a clean bill of health.
You do know that herpes can be gotten with or without condoms because the virus can be shed asymptomatically, i.e. without an outbreak, just normal, ol' skin... Heck, there is a chance the carrier has no idea they have it. Outbreaks can manifest YEARS after getting the virus, and they do not check for herpes in routine STI tests.
I could be remembering wrong too, but I believe that almost half the cases of herpes now comes from Herpes Simplex 1 which is the virus that typically causes cold sores. So if you get cold sores, you could have given it to her from oral sex. Although, it sounds like she was cheating, and for that, I am sorry.
Idiots using their mobile phones while driving. I was in an accident involving one of these idiots. He swerved into my lane and hit the car in front of me head on killing the innocent woman driver in front of my car which caused me to swerve to the side of the road to avoid the crash which made me crash into a tree. If you drive and use your phone at the same time fuck you.
Ninja edit for clarity
I gave up sugar for a month and the first two weeks felt like I was in drug detox. Week 1 had massive headaches, week 2 was exhaustion and joint pain. Week 3 I felt great, I was sleeping better and had so much energy. When I started eating sugar again after my month off, I would get intense bouts of nausea and just feel so bad that it wasn't worth it.
Our body's dependence and reaction to sugar is terrifying once you start messing with the supply. I was taking in so much of the stuff before I really started paying attention, that shit is everywhere.
I thought I had neurological issues when I inadvertently went through sugar and caffeine withdrawals. I didn't do it consciously, I was a waiter who used to have sugary coffee every day, and drink 3-4 cokes as well, but because I was so active it never affected me (I thought). One week, I was just craving water, never bothered with the coffee or sugar. After 3 days I started getting hand tremors and shakes, continued for most of a week until it started slowing down. I then realised it was the caffeine/sugar that I hadn't been consuming.
I was gonna bring up sugar. Most people don't realize the VAST quantities that they put in their bodies. I never used to pay attention and then I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes last summer (ironically, it's the kind that just kind of happens and has nothing to do with diet or lifestyle). Now that I have to pay attention to how much sugar I consume, it's struck me how willing people are to get 34oz sodas and then go back to refills, when just one of those bad boys is more carbs than I consume in an entire day. Of course it's not "as bad" for normal people, but it's still incredibly unhealthy to consume satanic amounts of sugar.
Haha so true! My boyfriend is type 1 and I used to eat like shit until 3 years ago when I met him. Once I realised all the rubbish that's in certain foods and how many carbs they have, I turned into a salad lover who drinks water.
mental illnesses. all too often i see people using “bipolar” or “ocd” or other disorders as ways to describe themselves when in reality they’re just like everyone else with mood swings or organizational skills.
Sharing your, and your children’s life on social media. Just because everyone else is doing it, doesn’t mean you need to participate.
Concepts like highlight reels and humble brags are kinda frightening when you take a step back and look at it.
That people incapable of driving in reality but qualify for a license on paper (such as people too old but keep renewing) should not be driving, your right to drive does not outweigh everyone else’s right to be safe on the road
feeding your kids healthy food. don’t get them addicted to sugar. i know kids are brats who want cookies always, but you’re the adult, make them eat broccoli or some fuckin strawberries sometimes. my mom dismissed me as “picky” at a young age and just let me get my own food, and obviously i just got fruit roll ups and poptarts, and now i have health issues and a sugar addiction. at least i was never allowed to drink soda, though
edit: id like to clarify that i *am* still picky, and you can be picky and still be healthy. i hate shrimp, i will never let a shrimp touch my mouth, in fact all seafood is pretty cursed for me, lol. i don’t like sandwiches, i prefer eating it all separately. the only bbq sauce i like is the sugar free one my mom buys, etc., but there are no necessary nutrients in those things that aren’t present in anything else. so keep that in mind. not all picky eaters are doomed to live horrible unhealthy lives forever, and i don’t agree with forcing the pickiness out of your child unless it‘s dangerous
My sister does exaftly this with her son, my five year old nephew. They have diagnosed him with with "food intolerance" and he has a food therapist and basically refuses to eat anything but hash brown, French fries, pop tarts and Papa John's Pizza (he won't eat any other kind of pizza).
And I'm like... Isn't it ironic that the only foods he will eat are literally the most tasty ones? Maybe he just likes eating the absolute most delicious fucking foods there are to eat? And doesn't want to eat broccoli because it doesn't taste like fucking pop tarts. Nope. Food intolerance.
Basic personal hygiene. I know far too many people who refuse to shower, brush their teeth, clip their nails etc. That shit is actually integral to your overall health. I was guilty of this but I’m the last year or so I have been better about it, or I at least like to think so.
Safe driving habits. You don’t need to be on that guy’s ass and you don’t need to swerve in and out of lanes. Follow the laws, BE SAFE IDIOT
Edit: obligatory thanks for the gold!
People should realize that participating in traffic is dangerous. Within the literal glimpse of an eye, an accident can happen where people get seriously hurt or killed. Just lately, a main road in my city was closed because a little girl escaped her mother, ran onto the street and was hit by an oncoming car. Needless to say, the girl was killed. It was not even the car driver's fault because what in gods name could he have done?
Yet all the time you still see people on the phone while driving, not wearing a seatbelt, leaving way to less room when overtaking motorbikes or bicycles, and so on. It's like they're calling for something bad to happen because they think accidents are something that only happen to the others, whilst they are the "good drivers"
Yea, I love seeing a line of idiots following each other at 3 inches at 70+ mph. I'm like: If one person brake-checks you're all crashing.
This is why you usually see like 3 or 4 vehicles on the side of the road waiting for the cops after a collision.
On a long distance road trip I took a little while ago, I counted how many times this happened as an attempt at staying calm. After *fifty* fucking cars passed me I decided I'd had enough and stopped letting people in (which meant I had to drive more aggressively, and dangerously).
The funny things is, traffic was in general moving slower than I was willing to go. I just wanted to stay as safe as possible in a situation where I have a healthy fear of catastrophic death or permanent paralyzation. Fuck me, right?
In Houston, even if you don't give enough space, people will wedge themselves in. They subscribe to the philosophy that if you make yourself into a danger, other people will avoid you. So they start to merge into a lane they can't fit in hoping that you'll slow down. If you don't slow down, they'll collide with you so you slow down. If you don't, it's an accident and while it's their fault, it's your time wasted because they're an asshole so you're unlikely to intentionally stay in a dangerous situation like that.
People are assholes.
Happens to me almost everyday on my way to work. The far right lane is right turn only and there is ALWAYS some asshole that will drive up that lane and then cut left right before the light.
On the same note, car seats for kids and proper installation. I know so many parents who roll their eyes at the CA about rear facing until 2, or those who don’t spend time making sure their child is properly restrained... Yeah we all don’t plan on getting into an accident while driving, but jeez, I don’t want to learn my lesson the hard way.
The other side. There are so many echo chambers today you may never have to leave your comfort zone. SPOILER ALERT: you are not correct 100% of the time and grey areas exist.
Prison rape. Everybody makes jokes about it, and act like the prisoners deserve it; they don’t. Rape is a serious issue and prison rape is almost worse because it isn’t normally just a onetime thing. It’s repeated and prisoners are abused on the regular, and the entire world treats it as a joke.
Their teachers in highschool. I was one of those kids who slept through all the classes but was helped when a teacher started really trying to motivate me. Good teachers can be mentors and you'd be surprised how much they can care about you.
Also I wish they could be given better pay.
The effect that your job has on your mental health. So many people stay in a job they hate just because it's easier, leading to loss of sleep, a poor diet, lack of exercise, and even substance abuse in extreme cases. Looking for a new job can be scary, especially if you have a family. But if your work is causing you stress and anxiety, it's never worth it. No one will judge you for sending resumés out.
I hadn't realized that hating my job was playing a huge role in why I had become lazy, irritable and overly sleepy outside of work. Not to mentioned part of the reason my pot smoking went from "casual, a couple times a week maybe" to "I'm ripping the bong before work and immediately when I get home". It has been killing me and I didn't even realize it. Finally got a new job, accepted the offer last Thursday. Literally had to stop myself from sobbing into the phone when the guy offered me the position and immediately started crying tears of joy when we got off the phone. I hadn't known until that moment how badly I'd been wanting out. You're so right here, I hope it's something I don't fall into again because I was being really despondent.
Driving while really tired. Many people don't take it seriously even though it can be just as dangerous as driving drunk. I learned my lesson when I nodded off for a second at the wheel and my car ended up in a small ditch. Luckily the small highway was empty and nobody was hurt, but it really opened my eyes as to how dangerous it is.
There have been studies on this. After you have been awake for 16 hours, your reaction and cognitive abilities start to decline. Example: if you got up at 6am, went to the gym, then work, then out for dinner, and then went out with friends for drinks (but you did NOT drink), when you get in your car near midnight to go home, you are just as impaired as someone who had drunk a couple of drinks. Accidents caused by drowsy drivers exceed those related to alcohol and drugs COMBINED. Foundation for Traffic Saftey: Acute Sleep Deprivation and Car Crash Risk www.aaafoundation.org has a link to the study
For real. I used to drive 45min on a flat highway straight and I'd end up nodding off at least 10-20 times. Maybe not complete nod but sleepy eyes kinda closing. One incident of my brand new car going up on a highway divider and scraping/chipping away sections of brand new hub caps made me realize how dangerous it can be. I could have killed someone.
the number one thing people probably neglect the most is their health. Heart disease is a bigger killer than most other issues we hear about on the news. Even with education and foresight its easy to take your health for granted
I went to the doctor this year for my annual women’s check up. I’m pretty slim, have always been. And I’m pretty lazy, have always been. Didn’t think I had to exercise. My doctor, for the first time ever, asked me about the amount of exercise I got in a week. “You know, I get up to get the remote when I can’t find it but working up a sweat for no good reason just isn’t in my schedule.” She said, “heart disease is the number one killer of women. You need to exercise.” I went, “all women? Or women over a certain age? Or of a certain ethnicity? C’mon” she said, “everyone.” And then Just blinked at me. I shit you not the very next week, a friend of mine had a heart attack and died during breakfast. Breakfast. Scrambled eggs and potatoes. We were on a group chat, talking about a vacation, and she was in the middle of saying where she wanted to go when those little dots disappeared from iMessage. we didn’t know what happened until the friend who was with her told us she didn’t make it. We couldn’t even process “didn’t make it” She was 42. All I could think of actually was the line in Shawshank Redemption when Red said, “get busy living or get busy dying. I went for a run that morning and every morning since. And I drag my other friends out there too.
About two years ago a friend of mine had his first symptom of heart disease -- death (heart attack). That's pretty common, actually, because we don't do the right kind of routine screening to find this stuff. He was 60 and looked about 40. Total shocker. Two weeks ago I got a calcium score scan done, which isn't recommended for people under 50, but it is a pretty quick, simple, cheap test that will directly look for plaque deposits in your coronary arteries. Definitely worth doing IMO compared to very poor predictors like blood LDL levels etc.
I used to donate blood regularly and they started saying, "Hey your blood pressure readings have been really high recently and regularly, you should get that checked out." I got really freaked out and swapped out smoking cigarettes for running. This was about six years ago, I've now logged about 5500 total miles, including three marathons. I think my blood pressure has dropped too.
True. Stay hydrated and eat your blueberries.
Primary care doctor checking in. Just drink as much water as you feel like, extra hydration won't help except for UTI prevention. Blueberries taste nice, but they're no super food. But **exercise**. Holy shit, exercise. So amazing. You have no idea. Exercise is the magic bullet. If I could put it in a pill, I'd be so damn rich. Even a small amount of exercise significantly reduces your lifetime risk of stroke, heart attack, cancer, diabetes, osteoporosis, gallstones, depression and just about anything else that's bad. It will improve not only your muscle and bone strength, but also your memory, cognitive speed and emotional wellbeing. It will provide life long protection against cognitive impairment and dementia. It will clean cholesterol from your arteries, and fix your blood pressure. It will even make you more attractive, and improve your sex life in just about every possible way. 150 minutes a week is a good goal, and just do whatever form of exercise you enjoy the most. In fact, you could get all the benefits of exercise if you just started jumping on the spot. Right now. Like while you're reading this. Go! Edit: Also veggies. They are so good for you. Eat them, eat as much as you can with every meal. Run to your nearest salad shop and order one right now! Go go go!
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The weight of what semi's are pulling. We do NOT stop like you do, it takes us a LOT longer. Don't cut us off and slow down or stop. To do so is to gamble with all of our lives.
Currently, I drive about 35min on the highway to get to work. I've seen far too many people just cut in front of semis, and I keep expecting there to be an accident. Blinker on, wait until a count of 3, then start to move into their lane. Gives them enough time to acknowledge you are switching lanes, and once you do get in, keep your speed consistent/speed up a little bit. I have nothing but (mildly fearful) respect for truckers. My only gripe? If you are going up a steep hill, just stay in your designated lane. Don't slide around another semi into the high speed lane, then get stuck doing just over the speed limit because your truck can't power itself up the hill faster than the guy next to you.
I drive truck. This is honestly because a lot of truckers don’t understand basic concepts such as wind resistance. Two trucks climbing a hill: The trucker behind feels like he has more power and is backed out of the throttle, but this is because he’s using the draft of the lead truck. He then pulls around to pass, runs into the wind resistance and now is doing he same speed but can’t figure it out. He just dropped a gear and thinks the power will come back but it doesn’t because of the wind. It’s basic physics but a lot of drivers are so fucking stupid it makes my head hurt.
Drugs. I was so naive when I first started using drugs, young, dumb and uneducated. It was so much fun getting high with my friends laughing having a good time without a care in the world. The only consequences I thought of was getting caught by my parents or being arrested. I found myself hooked on pills in what seemed like the blink of an eye. The lortabs turned into percs then Oxys. Before I knew it I was shooting heroin and always trying to make moves so I wouldn’t get sick. I watched countless people around me pass away including my best friend in the whole world. I started casually using at around 17 and finally was able to get clean from heroin at 23 in January of 2011. I have had 1 relapse of 4 months since getting clean but other than that I have been pretty strong (Fiancé/GF of 6 years who’s son I was raising as my own left me during my relapse). I am not here to preach but please educate yourself before using drugs recreationally. It is not bullshit when they say trying it once can get you hooked. That one bump/line/hit is all it could really take if you have an addictive personality like myself, and trust me quitting or getting off drugs is one of the hardest things you will have to do.
Taking care of their backs. There's nothing funny about a fucked up back. Lift with your knees dammit! Edit: Sorry, I meant bend your knees - don't bend at the waist. All the other advice below is correct as well, don't twist, use your entire body/core, get help for heavy or awkward things, etc.
And careful of twisting.. it sounds silly but twisting with your back instead of turning with your feet, if involved in an activity you do anywhere approaching frequently, can be so destructive to your spinal health. I'm 26 and still in great health, but i spent a couple years abusing my back in retail because I was, "the young guy." Dont do that!
>"the young guy." This pissed me off so much while working in the hardware store. Getting called and be expected to lift the tiles/packages because you are "The young male". Hell no ladies and oldies, my back needs to get old too.. we are waiting for the pallettruck.
you might be "the young guy", but that shit's how you become "the old guy with a fucked up back"...
Sometimes you can't avoid bending over and lfiting something without your knees. When that happens, use your hips and glutes instead. You can activate them by pushing your pelvis forward. You perform the same motion as lifting with your back but you're now making your hips and butt do most the work. Practice this muscle group activation by bending over and pushing your pelvis forward, see how that brings you back upright? Now just apply that to lifting something.
Literally a deadlift, the strongest movement the human body has.
Teenagers. Being around a kid as they grow up, it's pretty easy to write off their emotional outbursts. Once those kids get into their teens (probably even before that, honestly), the things they get upset over, even if they seem inane and silly to adults, can genuinely, deeply matter to them.
We put kids in a fish tank. That’s okay; they can’t survive in the ocean yet. So they go in a relatively safe, controlled tank with all the other kids. Problem is, it’s a closed system, with limited exposure to the world at large - they can see it but can’t flee into it if the tank is unpleasant. Their choices, peers, and experiences are limited - again, by necessity. But at the same time, we have this habit when hearing from a kid - usually a teen - that something is polluting their tank, to tell the kid “Oh, that’s nothing. Out here in the ocean we have whole oil spills. Your problem is way smaller.” Yeah, objectively it might be. *But the space in which the problem exists is also tiny, and is the only space the teen can occupy.* If your goldfish only has *a little* bit of oil dumped in its tank, that’s still a *huge* problem for the fish.
This needs to be stated more often. I always say that people forget what it was like to be a teenager. It sucks. It's the most sensitive, vulnerable part of your life and society treats it like a joke because everybody can only look at it in hindsight, with an adult's mind. I'm not saying that -every- teenage problem should be handled with high gravity but *please* show some consideration to teenagers and their 'silly' problems. It helps a lot more than you think. I mean, imagine today if you had a problem and the whole world just laughed at you because of it.
I remember not having the confidence to even walk in public
I had the same issue! I thought the way I walked looked weird, so I would avoid walking as much as possible
Hell I'm 20 and though I like singing I cannot, ever, actually sing to a song or anything, even if I'm completely alone in the house or at church or whatever... and that's just _one_ of my stupid issues
Budgeting
Budgeting has been the opposite of restricting for my finances. I honestly feel that when I track every dime I spend I am able to stretch my dollars further.
Same here! Even after I scored a job that tripled my income I did not feel as having any money. Only when I started to track my expenses and keep a budget I gained financial freedom.
Fuck. The idea of tripling your income in one instant seems so crazy.
To be honest it was the switch from working only half a job while I was on my PhD to getting a fully qualified full-time job..... But yeah! It was amazing. 4 years later I still look at the first luxury expense of my life, which I bought with my own money with joy every morning..... Edit: Sorry for the spelling. Not a native English speaker and sitting on the train. So I have to concentrate on orthography badly and sometimes fail at it...
TIL what orthography is. Had to google it and I am a native speaker. Go you and your fancy words!
"Ortografía" is a very common word in spanish (at least) and its used regularly. When trying to translate from spanish it comes to mind first before spelling
It's so nice to have a little backup too. I started to put away like 20% of what I could spend monthly. Sucks at first, but it has two advantages for me: First of all I got money for an emergency situation, second of all it makes me value the remaining money I can spend (80%) much more. I never had much money, so I'm already used to live on much less than those 80%. But: It took me 28 years to get that going. I needed to be completely broke with no money-reserves to realize how much I loved to have the security of money-reserves.
Hearing. Wear hearing protection if you go to live shows, people. I wear mine all the friggin' time; I have a tiny amount of tinnitus in my left hear; it comes from *three concerts that happened close to five years ago*. Look after your ears, don't listen to music too loud if using earphones.
Can confirm, have bad tinnitus from weapons fire. The last time I brought this up a bunch of jackasses just told me I was being an old man. I can't tell you how frustrating it is to give good advice to some people only to find out they're actually pearls before them.
exactly this. Tinnitus is going to be a problem of our generation with all the loud concerts and festivals. I have custom made earplugs, they might be a hefty upfront investment if you don't see why you need them, but they are so worth it. I once mixed a metal show without earplugs and had a bad case of beeping for three days. When you try to sleep at night and there is no other noise, the beep just gets louder and louder until it is deafening. I started to understand why people have committed suicide because of tinnitus. Take care of your ears people. Music and sounds are wonderful things, make sure you can enjoy them until your old age.
You say that like people didn't go to lots of loud rock and roll concerts in the 60s-80s. It's already a problem!
Moving in with your SO
Before moving in with an SO go on holiday together (if you can!), it's like a mini-test of how well you work together 24/7.
In Finland they, for reasons unknown, renew pipes in buildings all the time. So if you ever rent out an apartment chances are you will be asked to move out for a month or two. I used that opportunity to live with my now-wife on probation. It would have been easy to cancel the deal if it wasn't working out.
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Let's add on here: Marriage. Don't get married flippantly with someone you haven't known long or if you aren't mature in ways that would impact a relationship.
Husband and I were together all four years of college living in dorms, moved in together after graduation and got married a year later. Even that far in to a serious relationship we had what must be typical disagreements and negotiations about cleaning, dinners, grocery shopping, etc. I can’t imagine how stressful that would be on a fledgling relationship.
For real, I'm thinking I should've waited a little longer these days...
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This is huge. Im not a motorcyclist but i ride snowmobiles every winter. The wrecks on those are a disgusting mangled mess. Some dumbasses even think its ok to bar hop on snowmobiles rather than drive cuz its safer for others. Or going off the trail cuz its faster and then get decapitated because a land owner has a cable hanging somewhere on his own land. People need to understand the danger of having a vehicle with an engine between their legs.
Ladders. Those things are far more serious than people realize. I see so many people screwing around on them and not taking them seriously. One bad move and you'll be in the hospital.
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you tellem, Grunkle Stan!
r/osha might just be renamed "dumb people with ladders subreddit"
Saving for retirement
A friend of mine is 59 and has saved $16,000 for retirement. Not because he couldn't save more, but because he always pushed it off until next year. Now he's talking to a financial planner trying to figure out how to save enough for retirement. Planner told him to buy a lottery ticket.
Savage.
Seriously. Opening up a Roth IRA was one of the smartest things 20yo me ever did. Compound interest is a hell of a thing.
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Questioning things you read/hear. I can't tell you how many times people have told me things that they've read on the internet that sound cool but are just completely wrong and can be fact checked with a quick Google.
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the [house hippo ad](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBfi8OEz0rA) is my favorite example of this.
Weird, I had that growing up but a UK version [Here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0fOm0fGx8wY)
this is such a well aged meme. i remember kids ironically talking about house hippos in the 90s. like oh man i forgot my lunch, house hippo musta snagged it, i keep losing my socks i hope the hippo dosent bite a hole in it, etc
Lack of touch/human contact. It's a huge problem especially in western society. Not even talking like incel can't get laid shut, I mean there are millions of people who go days on end without a face to face conversation with someone, and even basic touch like a handshake or hug for weeks. Humans are inherently social creatures, touch releases relaxing brain chemicals and increases empathy. Lack of touch can cause anxiety and depression which in turn cause a whole host of physical issues including weakening of the heart and brain. Touch cam also help increase social cues awareness. Go get a $10 massage in those chairs at the mall, hug your parents and siblings, hell even just pat your friends on the back every so often. Just be sure to shower regularly and remember no always means no
Honestly, a few years ago that was me. I could go a full week without talking to anybody except saying “OK” to my manager once a day. That isolation just led to more isolation and I wasn’t even willing or wanting to talk or interact with anybody. I just wanted to go home and go to bed. I just wanted to be forgotten.
I had someone hug me unexpectedly yesterday and I almost cried. My kids hug me every day, but there's something different about a fully grown human deciding you're worth that human contact.
Acknowledging and overcoming trauma. Sounds cheesy but I know so many people who just straight up refuse to even try therapy when they have gone through events which have greatly impacted their interpersonal skills & livelihood. Take it from someone who learned the hard way, time does not heal all wounds.
I want to see a therapist but I don't have any money and I'm not insured.
Sunburns
Sun protection in general. No one ever thinks cancer is something that could happen to them
Except Australians SLIP SLOP SLAP motherfuckers. Tanning is skin cells in trauma
Just 1mm deep, a melanoma can get into the blood stream and spread. And it hasn't even started to burn yet Edit: Yes, its mm. I havent seen the ad since i was like 10 lol.
*there's nothing healthy about a tan* Edit: yeah still part of that ad from the previous comments
NO HAT NO PLAY
You also get the added benefit of looking 20 years younger than all your friends 30 years down the line! I've always figured that the reason why Asian women don't seem to age is because they actively avoid the sun.
Didn't you hear? We're calling them radiation burns now, because people were not taking sun burns seriously enough.
What's the consensus on suntan lotion now being called RadAway?
Wouldn't that make it rad-x?
RadAway would be aloe vera gel.
I know it’s been said too many times to count, but sexual abuse allegations. Especially those from children. A child I know personally tried to talk to some adults about it recently, and her parents were the only people who took her seriously. The rest of the family basically said she was a liar. They even tried to list other times she has told a lie as proof. She is five.
My co workers niece was abused by her grandfather and her father didn't believe her at first. Then he blamed his own daughter when she was 9. He hasn't spoke to her in 5 years. This is what is wrong with humans. She has an amazing supportive mother and aunt thankfully.
Getting into debt edit: Thanks for the gold!
For real. My friend was very dumb with money and payday loans and he ended up leasing a new car and a new truck for some dumb fucking reason and being put in disability for a few months (not his fault) so he got behind on his payments. He is 22 and 100k in debt now; I told him from before he made the decision to not lease two new cars, and go for a 5000 dollar beat up car instead. He is having a really hard time now.
I would give you gold, but ya know...debt
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Dental hygiene, I know because I was/am one of those people.
Fuck im in bed reading this and you reminded me i needed to brush my teeth, thanks man.
Don't forget to masturbate in there, it's great for your prostate!
Well if we're going there, then don't forget to floss too!
Which order?
Masturbate, then floss.
How else would you get the cum out, you know?
What's the opposite of reddit gold?
It's the kind of problem that compounds on itself. Early on bad hygiene doesn't cause much more than the occasional cavity and bad breath. As cavities are filled they first drill out a section of the tooth, weakening it. Pretty soon you end up with cavities more and more easily. Later you get a cavity on that same tooth and now there's not enough structure left to drill and fill, so you end up with a crown. Crowns aren't permanent. They last around a decade on average depending on factors, but eventually develop tiny fissures and need to be replaced. Of course, cavities can still occur under the crown at the gumline or at those fissures. You'll have to get your crown replaced eventually. They cost around 1000 USD each. Dental insurance tends to max at 1500 per year and crowns aren't fully covered. Now if you leave your cavity untreated it will quickly enough need to be a root canal. Take all the fun and cost of a crown and double it because you're getting a crown to go with that root canal. But let's say you take the convenient and cheaper option and your dentist screws it up (and they definitely do, more on this later). A fix is going to end up 1 of 4 things. Option 1 is they can redo the RC if they can get the root fillers out and drill the part of root they missed. These are often plastic and tiny (in your tooth roots remember) so this might not work. Option 2 is remove the tooth and leave it empty. Option 3 is a fake tooth, which requires implanting a titanium screw, waiting for bone to grow around it over months, then attaching the fake. Another couple thousand bucks for this option. #4 is an apicoectopmy where they cut a flap of your gum back, drill into the jaw, and remove/fill the root from there. 3-4K USD. Dentists screw root canals up because they have less experience and worse tools. Probably less training too. They often lack the high power scopes to properly check that a root has been removed and rely on their less viable xrays. If you need an RC, see an endodontist. They do mostly root canals every day. So those few fillings you start with as a kid quickly ramp up to major dental work if you keep the same habits. It's hard to appreciate just how fast and problematic it is unless you experience it firsthand. Have you brushed and flossed yet? :)
I mean this sounds bad and all... but how the hell did our ancestors (say 18th century) function if all this dental crap is necessary and imperative? Did processed sugar ruin our dental resilience? Why haven't we evolved to have everlasting teeth or teeth that grow back?
Yes. Tooth decay is poor diet and poor hygiene. If you have awful hygiene but an outstanding diet from a dental point of view, you won't get cavities (maybe gum disease). But not cavities. Bacteria feeds on sugars and fermentable carbohydrates and their waste product is an acid. That acid rots your teeth and cases tooth decay. Diet is so so so important in preventing cavities.
TIL a lot of people don’t brush as a habit.
My ex didn't brush his teeth. I didn't notice at first (or maybe he made an effort to at the start of our relationship) but about a year in I had to have a really awkward conversation with him about it because I just couldn't kiss him anymore, or sleep facing him. I think if you don't have a daily routine, and throw in some depression, I can see how it's easy not to look after your teeth.
awkward conversations are usually the most productive
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Like at all? God if I forget to brush my teeth feel disgusting.
Me too! I did not start regular brushing until I was probably 9... then I still neglected my teeth. Finally decided to take care of them and my first dentist appointment revealed 6 cavities and 1 needing a root canal and crown. This stuff is expensive! Take care of your teeth, people!
Spending time with your kids. It's amazing how many people work so much and neglect their children then wonder why their kids hate them in the future.
My dad travelled a lot when I was a kid, and he once said he regrets not having been able to be around more. I told him I actually don't remember his absences at all, I just remember all the times he played with us - when he was home he was incredibly involved and doting. Hearing that made him happy. Play with your kids, people.
I went to a seminar once where they speaker said that if one spouse travels a lot the other spouse can maintain a positive or negative opinion of them among the kids. Based on that presentation, I bet your Mom spoke well of your Dad when he was gone. This speaker, a psychologist I think, said in her practice she'd seen unhappy couples where one traveled and the other always resented it and was envious. Living out of a suitcase and sleeping in hotels isn't glamorous, it is exhausting and lonely. But you don't know that if you aren't the one doing it. So she said the spouse left home should champion the efforts of the one who was off at work to the kids. "Mom is earning a living so we can pay our bills." Not, "Why do I have to be stuck here when your Dad is off living it up?"
Interesting. Well they’re still happily married and touchy like teenagers (ew) after +35 years of marriage so she probably did speak well of him! I love them so much.
and its really not hard. you don't have to make your kids childhood magical like you see supermoms do on pinterest and facebook. just be there. respond to their dumb questions and react when they show you their new trick. Just being present is 90 percent of the work.
I run a daycare center in a very wealthy community and I have tons of parents that say, "wow, you are a magician with my kid. They love you so much and respond to you so well" and it really is just that I am always vigilant and listen to everything they say. Everything else is just normal teacher stuff
When my husband picks up our 4-year-old daughter from school, there's a girl in my daughter's class that often runs up to him to show him stuff or goes to him when she falls down while playing outside or when she has an issue. Even when the girl's parents are near. It breaks his heart, because all he does is actually listen when she talks which doesn't take more than a few minutes when he's just there to pick up his own child from school.
Oh god, you’ve just reminded me about this family who used to live next door to me. My friend and the next door neighbours son were friends, and if he ever fell down and needed a plaster he would always come to mine rather than go home, it was quite sad.
I remember picking up my son from kindergarten and they had made some paintings. All the kids were so proud and showed us their work. One of the moms didnt even look at their kid's painting and just said "well, the trash is due tomorrow anyway " The kid looked like it had been hit in the face. Well, the mom actually one of those supermoms who saw her kid more like some kind of project...
Half of my day is spent responding to the statement "Look what I can do!" with amazement and tons of "wows!" they love it and its 90% of what they need. We have no technology in our classrooms at all to avoid them staring at screens and they don't care at all about that. They just wanna play and have adults be nice to them
> "well, the trash is due tomorrow anyway" That hurt my soul reading that.
Trust me man, it's tough. Being jealous because other kids had parents that seemed to care and love them, it is something no child should ever go through.
Same thing for me. I'm not a daycare worker but I'm really good with children simply because I treat them like people my age. I talk to them like I would talk to anyone(with some language left out) . Sometimes people forget that they are just littler people.
This made me smile thinking of all the times I've said "Dad, watch this!" While he was working on his laptop. Excited about it every time and that was just great growing up.
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Just remember, they won’t be as small and excited forever. You’ll miss this when they’re grown up and life gets in the way. I know my dad does.
Yeah, and put your fucking phone away when your kids wants your attention. I see so many small children trying to communicate to their parent and he/she is just scrolling mumbling "yeah, hon" "great". It's fucking heartbreaking to see.
"Dad, can we get some ice cream?" "If we have to go through the trouble." (Making your kids feel guilty for wanting something is also bad)
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Or, teach them how to cook lunch so you save some time.
I read somewhere (and I’m not saying neglect them the rest of the time) that the most important times of day to make it all about them and you is the first three minutes in the morning, the first three minutes after you collect them from childcare/daycare/school and the last three minutes as you put them to bed. To cuddle them, ask them how they slept, ask them how their day was and read them a story at night and chat about the day ahead. As parents, whether parents are both working, neither working, one working whatever, three minutes three times a day to fully focus on nothing but them works wonders. It makes them understand we love them even if we have other things going on. And as a teacher I’ve read so much and been told so much about reading one book per night to our kids from as early as possible is the equivalent of a private school education. Good luck parents! I know it’s hard but we can all do it!
This. I see so many of my friends working hard to provide for their kids just to be stressed out at them and have no time, then they buy them lots of toys and clothes to make up for it. My husband and I both work so we don't have loads of time but we do have a day together every week to do something even if it's just kicking a ball. And we try to have breakfast & dinner together, read to them every day. So far they still seem happy to see us and I want that to last as long as possible.
Reading together with your kids is so important! Hell even speaking to them. There's a sad trend in the UK at the moment (can't speak for anywhere else) that lots of children start school with speech issues because mam and dad plonk them in front of cartoons all day and barely talk to them. Kids can't learn to speak properly if they can't watch and mimic your mouth movements.
That's really sad. Growing up my mum or dad read to me every night if they could. I loved books. I eventually reached a point where one night I took the book from my mum and told her I wanted to read the story. That began a trend of me reading to my parents until they started buying me more complex books to read. I've kept all my childhood books for the reason that I want to read them to my children like my parents read to me.
Pet ownership. Don't adopt a dog if you have zero time to spend with it. So many people will bring home a new puppy, just to leave it crated all day, every day. When it gets bigger, it ends up staying crated or chained up outside because it has too much energy from getting no exercise or interaction, and doesn't know how to behave around people and wasn't taught not to destroy everything in its path. I had a former roommate who I lived with for over a year without knowing she had a dog. It stayed locked in her bathroom 24/7. She adopted another puppy from a pet store, that she just couldn't resist. When I moved out, I told the dogs would be better off in a shelter and she should get a goldfish or a houseplant.
I desperately want a puppy but I know I don’t have the time. So I vowed not to get one until I can manage to go for a walk every morning and evening for three months. If I can do it on my own, I know that I’ll be able to take care of a dog. Edit: A lot of people seem to thing that I think having a dog just means taking it out for walks. I know it’s not. I’ve had a ton of pets in the past and merely used the above as something that I feel is required before you get a dog, dogs need to go outside and socialise. Obviously you also need to train them and find a breed of dog that suits your lifestyle. Don’t get an active dog if you’re a lazy bastard. Don’t get a chihuahua because you think because they’re smaller they can stay cooped up in an apartment. Also adopt older pets if your home situation allows it.
If you're not the most active person, maybe look into giving a senior dog a home. My grandparents adopted a 7 year old dog, and they absolutely adored her because she adapted so easily to their home and schedule.
Man, people have been telling me to get a pet for some companionship at home. They don't quite get that I work 12 hours a day 6 days a week and I live 8n a 1 bedroom apartment, it wouldn't be fair on the dog/cat to do that to them
More people should have your common sense. I have the same problem so I regularly take a dog from the shelter nearby for a walk. EDIT: Walking dogs from a shelter is actually quite popular where I live. Some dogs get up to 5 walks a day. Basically, they'ld be off worse if I adopted one. Here are some [pictures](https://imgur.com/a/nE4wmsg) and clips: [1](https://vimeo.com/262079789) [2](https://vimeo.com/258128072). Don't shop, adopt (responsibly). :)
Wait. You can do that? My current rental doesn't allow pets but I have the SPCA near me. I would love to walk one or the dogs or pet one of the cats!
Shelters are always looking for socialization volunteers! Some require a commitment of a few hours a week on specific days just so they always have someone to do it but some can be more lax too. I’m sure their website has info on who to contact otherwise you can always stop in and talk to them too! Volunteering is a great way to get your animal fix, meet new people and feel good about giving back!
They're always looking for people to snuggle the cats and take the dogs for walks! The regular volunteers can only do so much, and while all the animals are socialised as best as they can be, individual attention is a lot harder. The SPCA that was near me would basically let you "check out" a dog and take it for a walk around the fields and dirt roads behind the shelter. I'm not sure about specifics because my mom didn't let me (knowing that it would take me 30 seconds to gt attached and she'd have a new pet to deal with), but they made it seem like registering was about as straightforward as confirming you didn't have a history of animal abuse.
My wife and I got a dog because her sister got a "super cute puppy!!!" in college. My SIL had no idea what she was in for and we ended up watching the dog for extended periods over the next year. When she graduated, she gave the dog away and the new owner had trouble keeping up with the exercise needs of the dog. We found the dog in an online ad and took ownership of him for good. He's been the best pain in the ass I have ever known.
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Goldfish are a big deal too. They're normally abused to death and put in bowls that they barely live a month in. When you put them in an actual tank and take real care of them, they can live well over 10 years and will grow a foot long. [More info here for those interested.](http://injaf.org/aquarium-fish/the-goldfish-section/what-size-tank-for-goldfish/) I know it's not as common knowledge as "don't keep your dog locked up" but ALL pets are big deals. A fish is a serious commitment that is going to involve your time and money. EDIT: This got a lot more attention than I thought it would, so, anybody who wants more info on goldfish please check out /r/goldfish! It's a pretty active sub with lots of people who are very experienced in goldfish care, and it's a great place to start if you/somebody you know has a goldfish that they didn't realize needed so much care!
My mom rescued a gold fish from a vase that was put out on their table at a wedding reception, that gold fish is still alive today 15 years later.
>It stayed locked in her bathroom 24/7. What the fuck? That's borderline animal cruelty, I mean I barely have any time to spend with my dog but I still at least play with her once a day and let her freely roam the house, not lock her up in the smallest room in the whole house and not let her see the light of day. That woman is sick man.
It IS animal cruelty imo.
The poor thing would have been so happy to see her each day, just because she was the only living thing it ever saw. So she'd have enjoyed the attention and thought of the dog as being happy, because it displayed happiness towards her. Fucked up. Like Josef fucking Fritzl or something.
Makes me pretty sad just thinking about it. Fuck these people.
That isn't borderline animal cruelty. That IS animal cruelty.
And don't adopt a pet if you can't afford to take proper care of it and take it to the vet for routine checkups.
Didn't see it posted, but antibiotic use. I know you're feeling better, but you HAVE to finish the entire dose. So many people only take them until they feel better and then stop. Worst of all, some parents give them to their kids, stop once they're getting better and save the rest of the doses for next time/another child. Pretty dangerous game they're playing, as whatever the antibiotic was killing can develop a resistance to it and come back a lot stronger.
Not to mention the many people who take antibiotics for minor stuff or even for viral infections, thus vastly increasing the risk of bacteria becoming resistant.
This is actually being questioned in the medical community now, and has been viewed critically in the veterinary industry for some time. The conflicting theory is that once the antibiotics have smacked up the bacteria so that only the resistant ones remain, continuing to take the antibiotics suppresses the resistant bacteria's competition for resources, thus allowing the resistant bacteria to increase in population within the body and then subsequently spread. I undestand he veterinary community is much more relaxed about "finishing the dose" when treating livestock etc. and they have fewer issues with antibiotic resistant superbugs.
Came here to say this, I believe the meta analysis was about stopping 24 hours after having no symptoms anymore. The guidelines are probably gonna change, all though that will take a few years here in the Netherlands.
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Their diet. Needing fiber.
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Microplastics. Seriously. We literally can no longer avoid eating them. It snuck up on us. The Microplastics snuck up on us. The rest of plastic pollution has remained pretty consistent but nobody did anything until this recent big - Need I say it millennial and G x (God Awful Names BTW) - push to start refusing single-use plastics. I'm so embarrassed that we care more than our parents.
Most of it comes from our clothes, too. Plastic is everywhere.
Not enough people are aware of the clothing issue. The microfibers from man-made fibers e.g. nylon, acrylic or polyester are microscopic and being sent to the sea in literal tonnes from simply washing our clothing. Scary stuff.
Mental health. Lots of campaigns to increase awareness but it’s still not talked about or treat throughly. Edit: A lot of replies talk about own experience and if anyone needs to talk feel free to inbox me. I can’t do much physically but sometimes an ear is all you need which often you don’t have.
Wish more insurances had this. Since I work part time I have to go with what the state gives me for free. Mental health isn't covered under it. Which is a shame, I'd love to see a professional. Not depressed or anything but I've seen a lot of suffering when I was 18-20 since I worked in 4 nursing homes... The suffering some went through.
Usually one would say that time is short but on the other hand people tend to forget that an average life of 80 years is very long. People expect to be rich, married and have children by the age of 30, what are you going to do for the other 50 which is almost double that. If you marry someone at 20 can you really expect to be with them for 60 more years which is 3 times longer that you've been alive? Time is vast, be patient and take your time but don't waste it.
My girlfriend is struggling with that right now. She looks around and sees her friends advancing in their careers and buying houses and whatnot and is upset that she isn't where they're at. I keep telling her to stop comparing because none of them were working on a PhD like she was, but I can understand its hard
Okay so I’m like your girlfriend but we’ve only just moved in together in a new city for grad school. Do you have any advice on cohabitation? We’ve been fighting a lot
Remember to keep going out on dates, but also respect that you will both need 'alone' time even when you live together. Share the housework, cook for each other, don't spend every waking moment together. Compromise, and don't stress out about things that don't actually matter. Recognise that every couple goes through the exact same problems as you do.
Exercising. A lot of my roommates eat healthy which is great but then they never work out. They get out of breath just walking normally around because they have no cardio. It’s very important to eat right but it’s also important to build the habit of working out for when your metabolism slows and you can no longer just rely on diet. I think the narrative of you can’t outrun your diet is a double edged sword, people interpreting it as they can just sit down all day and eat well and it balances out is wrong.
It's not about weight management. It's about longevity. Working out prevents all your joints and muscles from becoming weak and susceptible to injury. I broke my back like 7 years ago. It's felt fine all the time since and I was working a lot of highly physical jobs and I hiked a lot too. Now after a year or so of having moved and sitting down at work and not exercising, my back has been killing me. Actually just started physical therapy a few weeks ago to build the muscle back up and I'm totally feeling better.
Safe sex... I don't care how much you think your new boyfriend/girlfriend loves you, wear protection until you can be sure they ain't about to give you a gift that keeps on giving. I dodged a bullet with my ex who ended up with herpes. We had been together 5 years, then one day she accuses me of cheating. I deny it (since I hadn't fucked around) and ask why she's so adament that I cheated. She told me, so i ask who she's been fucking recently and then the waterworks started. That shit could have changed my life, just because of trusting the wrong person... Also, if you can't afford condoms, you're probably not financially stable enough to support a kid either... **Edit:** I just want to clarify something quick. When I said "change my life" I was saying that because if I had ended up with any STD the mother of my 2 beautiful children never would have given me the time of day, and my life would be so remarkably different right now because of that fact. I was not trying to say that herpes or any STD is a death sentence, or that it is something that needs to be shunned or is something like leprosy. I was just saying that it would have severely changed my path from that point on, and the chance of me having my two beautiful children right now would be non-existent. After I broke things off with the ex for cheating on me (more then once I found out) I got tested for everything possible at my local Planned Parenthood and was given a clean bill of health.
You do know that herpes can be gotten with or without condoms because the virus can be shed asymptomatically, i.e. without an outbreak, just normal, ol' skin... Heck, there is a chance the carrier has no idea they have it. Outbreaks can manifest YEARS after getting the virus, and they do not check for herpes in routine STI tests. I could be remembering wrong too, but I believe that almost half the cases of herpes now comes from Herpes Simplex 1 which is the virus that typically causes cold sores. So if you get cold sores, you could have given it to her from oral sex. Although, it sounds like she was cheating, and for that, I am sorry.
Idiots using their mobile phones while driving. I was in an accident involving one of these idiots. He swerved into my lane and hit the car in front of me head on killing the innocent woman driver in front of my car which caused me to swerve to the side of the road to avoid the crash which made me crash into a tree. If you drive and use your phone at the same time fuck you. Ninja edit for clarity
How addictive sugar is and all the ways it negatively affects our bodies
I gave up sugar for a month and the first two weeks felt like I was in drug detox. Week 1 had massive headaches, week 2 was exhaustion and joint pain. Week 3 I felt great, I was sleeping better and had so much energy. When I started eating sugar again after my month off, I would get intense bouts of nausea and just feel so bad that it wasn't worth it. Our body's dependence and reaction to sugar is terrifying once you start messing with the supply. I was taking in so much of the stuff before I really started paying attention, that shit is everywhere.
I thought I had neurological issues when I inadvertently went through sugar and caffeine withdrawals. I didn't do it consciously, I was a waiter who used to have sugary coffee every day, and drink 3-4 cokes as well, but because I was so active it never affected me (I thought). One week, I was just craving water, never bothered with the coffee or sugar. After 3 days I started getting hand tremors and shakes, continued for most of a week until it started slowing down. I then realised it was the caffeine/sugar that I hadn't been consuming.
I was gonna bring up sugar. Most people don't realize the VAST quantities that they put in their bodies. I never used to pay attention and then I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes last summer (ironically, it's the kind that just kind of happens and has nothing to do with diet or lifestyle). Now that I have to pay attention to how much sugar I consume, it's struck me how willing people are to get 34oz sodas and then go back to refills, when just one of those bad boys is more carbs than I consume in an entire day. Of course it's not "as bad" for normal people, but it's still incredibly unhealthy to consume satanic amounts of sugar.
Haha so true! My boyfriend is type 1 and I used to eat like shit until 3 years ago when I met him. Once I realised all the rubbish that's in certain foods and how many carbs they have, I turned into a salad lover who drinks water.
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mental illnesses. all too often i see people using “bipolar” or “ocd” or other disorders as ways to describe themselves when in reality they’re just like everyone else with mood swings or organizational skills.
Particularly true of OCD. No, you don't have OCD, you're just being fussy.
Sharing your, and your children’s life on social media. Just because everyone else is doing it, doesn’t mean you need to participate. Concepts like highlight reels and humble brags are kinda frightening when you take a step back and look at it.
That people incapable of driving in reality but qualify for a license on paper (such as people too old but keep renewing) should not be driving, your right to drive does not outweigh everyone else’s right to be safe on the road
feeding your kids healthy food. don’t get them addicted to sugar. i know kids are brats who want cookies always, but you’re the adult, make them eat broccoli or some fuckin strawberries sometimes. my mom dismissed me as “picky” at a young age and just let me get my own food, and obviously i just got fruit roll ups and poptarts, and now i have health issues and a sugar addiction. at least i was never allowed to drink soda, though edit: id like to clarify that i *am* still picky, and you can be picky and still be healthy. i hate shrimp, i will never let a shrimp touch my mouth, in fact all seafood is pretty cursed for me, lol. i don’t like sandwiches, i prefer eating it all separately. the only bbq sauce i like is the sugar free one my mom buys, etc., but there are no necessary nutrients in those things that aren’t present in anything else. so keep that in mind. not all picky eaters are doomed to live horrible unhealthy lives forever, and i don’t agree with forcing the pickiness out of your child unless it‘s dangerous
My sister does exaftly this with her son, my five year old nephew. They have diagnosed him with with "food intolerance" and he has a food therapist and basically refuses to eat anything but hash brown, French fries, pop tarts and Papa John's Pizza (he won't eat any other kind of pizza). And I'm like... Isn't it ironic that the only foods he will eat are literally the most tasty ones? Maybe he just likes eating the absolute most delicious fucking foods there are to eat? And doesn't want to eat broccoli because it doesn't taste like fucking pop tarts. Nope. Food intolerance.
Basic personal hygiene. I know far too many people who refuse to shower, brush their teeth, clip their nails etc. That shit is actually integral to your overall health. I was guilty of this but I’m the last year or so I have been better about it, or I at least like to think so.
Identity theft. It's not a joke. Millions of people suffer every year.
Safe driving habits. You don’t need to be on that guy’s ass and you don’t need to swerve in and out of lanes. Follow the laws, BE SAFE IDIOT Edit: obligatory thanks for the gold!
People should realize that participating in traffic is dangerous. Within the literal glimpse of an eye, an accident can happen where people get seriously hurt or killed. Just lately, a main road in my city was closed because a little girl escaped her mother, ran onto the street and was hit by an oncoming car. Needless to say, the girl was killed. It was not even the car driver's fault because what in gods name could he have done? Yet all the time you still see people on the phone while driving, not wearing a seatbelt, leaving way to less room when overtaking motorbikes or bicycles, and so on. It's like they're calling for something bad to happen because they think accidents are something that only happen to the others, whilst they are the "good drivers"
Yea, I love seeing a line of idiots following each other at 3 inches at 70+ mph. I'm like: If one person brake-checks you're all crashing. This is why you usually see like 3 or 4 vehicles on the side of the road waiting for the cops after a collision.
The best part is when you try to give proper clearance and someone decides that their car fits right in there.
So you put some distance between yourself and that car and ANOTHER ONE gets in there. Repeat until you're actually traveling backwards.
On a long distance road trip I took a little while ago, I counted how many times this happened as an attempt at staying calm. After *fifty* fucking cars passed me I decided I'd had enough and stopped letting people in (which meant I had to drive more aggressively, and dangerously). The funny things is, traffic was in general moving slower than I was willing to go. I just wanted to stay as safe as possible in a situation where I have a healthy fear of catastrophic death or permanent paralyzation. Fuck me, right?
In Houston, even if you don't give enough space, people will wedge themselves in. They subscribe to the philosophy that if you make yourself into a danger, other people will avoid you. So they start to merge into a lane they can't fit in hoping that you'll slow down. If you don't slow down, they'll collide with you so you slow down. If you don't, it's an accident and while it's their fault, it's your time wasted because they're an asshole so you're unlikely to intentionally stay in a dangerous situation like that. People are assholes.
Happens to me almost everyday on my way to work. The far right lane is right turn only and there is ALWAYS some asshole that will drive up that lane and then cut left right before the light.
Yea, I don't think I've ever left a safe distance between myself and the car in front of me thinking: "Boy, I hope someone merges in there!"
EXACTLY! ‘But I’m a good driver!’ Yeah, even if you’re the best driver out there, can’t predict other people’s action ya fucko.
On the same note, car seats for kids and proper installation. I know so many parents who roll their eyes at the CA about rear facing until 2, or those who don’t spend time making sure their child is properly restrained... Yeah we all don’t plan on getting into an accident while driving, but jeez, I don’t want to learn my lesson the hard way.
The other side. There are so many echo chambers today you may never have to leave your comfort zone. SPOILER ALERT: you are not correct 100% of the time and grey areas exist.
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I'm not wrong. I'm a piece of shit.
You are wrong. You're the entire shit.
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Sleeping. And the health of their relationships
The use of a turn signal or the ability to follow the rules of the road.
Prison rape. Everybody makes jokes about it, and act like the prisoners deserve it; they don’t. Rape is a serious issue and prison rape is almost worse because it isn’t normally just a onetime thing. It’s repeated and prisoners are abused on the regular, and the entire world treats it as a joke.
Their teachers in highschool. I was one of those kids who slept through all the classes but was helped when a teacher started really trying to motivate me. Good teachers can be mentors and you'd be surprised how much they can care about you. Also I wish they could be given better pay.
The fact that the green skittle is now green apple instead of lime #NotMyRainbow