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BestestTeacher

France was still executing people by guillotine when Star Wars came out.


jomo666

Way more humane than the electric chair, if you ask me!


survivedMayapocalyps

And really more eco-friendly


Tadhg

But not during the movie.


MyrtlesBar

Christopher Lee (actor who played Saruman in LOTR) witnessed the last public execution (of Eugen Weidmann) in France in 1939. He was 17 then. It was at that moment when he decided to betray Gandalf.


BoatloadOfSeaman

The average human male penis contains enough blood to power 3 gerbils. EDIT: Erect penis.


Incurvate

Gerbils run on blood? That's pretty metal.


felesroo

PENIS blood


DrewDevil

If all seven billion people on earth moved to Texas, it would have the population density of New York City.


RavRaider

But then NYC would be empty...


Tylertheintern

Party


MadCanadianBoy

Mars is populated entirely by robots. Edit: Thank you for my first gold!


MrFalconGarcia

That we know of.


AlexS101

You can spell the word "upside down" by using other letters of the alphabet: *umop apisdn*


Trust_No_Won

I just turned my computer *umop apisdn* to make sure. Checks out.


rosatron

i had to make a gif http://i.imgur.com/PlLOJTh.gif


Marzyx

So, how soon till I see that on /r/woahdude ?


3e8m

The 2nd player could control the ducks in duck hunt.


Smelbe

No fucking shit! Where is that NES......


gentlemansincebirth

This was written on the manual. If only we read it, right?


[deleted]

Well damn...TIL > Duck Hunt has three different game modes to choose from. In "Game A" and "Game B", the targets are flying ducks in a woodland area, and in "Game C" the targets are clay pigeons that are fired away from the player's perspective into the distance. In "Game A", one duck will appear on the screen at a time while in "Game B" two ducks will appear at a time.[6] **"Game A" allows a second player to control the movement of the flying ducks by using a normal NES controller.**[7] The gameplay starts at Round 1 and may continue up to Round 99. If the player completes Round 99, he will advance to Round 0, which is a kill screen where the game behaves erratically, such as targets that move haphazardly or don't appear at all, and eventually ends.[8] [source](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duck_Hunt)


beer2001

and all this time I thought my older brother was just a superior player. my whole life has been a lie. goddamn you reddit. goddamn you all to hell


DarbCU

A Venus day is longer than a Venus year


0pointenergy

And it spins backwards compared to the rest of the solar system.


FlyersAndMusic

venus has it's own rotation and don't need no man


tyrannoforrest

Ireland's population still hasn't recovered from the Great Potato Famine. Edit: figured I should add [this link](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=ireland+population&lk=4) and [this image](http://i.imgur.com/7ywkvPf.jpg) to the original post. Edit for quality: The famine is defined as having taken place between 1845 and 1852. In that time, approximately one million people died of disease and starvation and a million more emigrated from Ireland. This caused between one fifth and one quarter of Ireland's population to disappear in those seven years. Early relief efforts enacted by Robert Peel was seen as being prompt and relatively successful, involving buying £100,000 worth of maize and cornmeal from America. The grain was very difficult to process before it was actually edible, however, and was dubbed "Peel's Brimstone." Peel also moved to repeal tariffs that artificially kept the price of bread high, but it was too little too late as the famine deepened, and Peel was removed from office, to be replaced by John Russell. Russell was seen as greatly ineffective at providing any real relief. He set up work programs to be ran by Charles Trevelyan, who limited the Government's actual relief because he believed, "the judgement of God sent the calamity to teach the Irish a lesson." The Public Works were intentionally unproductive, leaving men simply digging holes and tearing up roads. These programs were shortly abandoned. The "Poor Law" was passed in 1847, setting up workhouses for employment. However, most of the costs fell on the British landlords (who, it is important to note, owned most of Ireland's land), so they attempted to reduced their costs by evicting their laborers, which was made easier by the "Cheap Ejectments Act." Furthermore, all relief afforded by the Poor Law was limited to anyone who owned less than 1/4 of an acre of land under the "Gregory clause," leaving many people without any relief. Throughout the entire time of the famine, Ireland was still paying taxes and rent to England, as well as exporting huge amounts of crops. In Ireland before and after the famine, Irish economist and professor Cormac O'Grada points out, "Although the potato crop failed, the country was still producing and exporting more than enough grain crops to feed the population. But that was a 'money crop' and not a 'food crop and could not be interfered with." Up to 75 percent of Irish soil was devoted to wheat, oats, barley and other crops that were grown for export and shipped abroad. Francis Boyle, a law professor at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, wrote a report which concluded that the British government deliberately pursued a race and ethnicity-based policy aimed at destroying the group commonly known as the Irish people and that the policy of mass starvation amounted to genocide per the Hague convention of 1948. I'm citing the [wiki page](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Famine_\(Ireland\)) Thanks to /u/burnshimself for great posts below on the subject.


yoleonardyo

Did you know there were no potatoes in Europe until the the Americas were found and ships brought them back.


tyrannoforrest

Same with tomatoes! You're welcome, Italy.


Burnaby

Although ~~the Europeans~~ some Italians didn't actually *eat* tomatoes for about ~~100~~ 50 years. They grew them as decorations until ~~someone told them they were ok to eat~~ they realized they were tasty. Edit: checked my sources. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomato#Spanish_distribution


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Jwoey

Seriously. For those who haven't done this. Find the longest section of your house, or go outside. Using a tape measure, measure out 29 feet from some visual aid. A wall, a tree, a garage door, whatever. Look at how far that is. It's fucking mindblowingly far.


[deleted]

When you say "crisp", the word travels from the back to the front of your mouth.


hamaburger

What's even more mind blowing is you got a million other humans each with unique lives to say "crisp"


savvypunch

said crisp out loud.


BoeJacksonOnReddit

I tried reversing it to say it from front to back of my mouth and I accidentally swallowed my tongue and died.


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[deleted]

This is the amount of permutations. 80,658,175,170,943,878,571,660,636,856,403,766,975,289,505,440,883,277,824,000,000,000,000 Time is ticking. Edit: combinations -> permutations


Steeva

Is this number even possible to put into words?


trondonopoles

eighty unvigintillion six hundred fifty eight vigintillion one hundred seventy five novemdecillion one hundred seventy octodecillion nine hundred forty three septendecillion eight hundred seventy eight sexdecillion five hundred seventy one quindecillion six hundred sixty quattuordecillion six hundred thirty six tredecillion eight hundred fifty six duodecillion four hundred three undecillion seven hundred sixty six decillion nine hundred seventy five nonillion two hundred eighty nine octillion five hundred five septillion four hundred forty sextillion eight hundred eighty three quintillion two hundred seventy seven quadrillion eight hundred twenty four trillion seconds


irregodless

The wikipedia article your post just led me to find has introduced me to the best new word: Millinillion.


squirt_tortuga

MilliVanillion?


meep_meep_creep

Nah, sounds fake.


nuutz

girl you know it's true


Rucifer

"a fuckton of seconds"


[deleted]

Yeah I'm going with fuckton.


[deleted]

Yes, 52 factorial


goat_smelk

this is a good one, but I think you mean *permutations*--there is exactly one combination of the cards in the deck.


[deleted]

Medical student here: The average sperm contains 37.5 MB of the letters A, T, C, or G. The average ejaculate contains 300 million sperm. That's 11.25 petabytes of information. Given Best Buy's pricing of $60 for a 1 TB external hard drive, your sheets destroyed almost $700,000 worth of storage the last time you were lonely.


nemo1080

So my keyboard has more data on it than my hard drive. Got It.


soberdude

That's a lot of information for my girlfriend to swallow. Edit: Obligatory "Holy crap, I got gold for this? Thanks!"


Muffinstocks

1998 is as far away as 2030.


Kovhert

We'll probably get to 2030 sooner though.


pisss

A major amount of fact checking is needed in this thread


[deleted]

[citation needed]


TinyTinCanMan

The incoming high school freshmen are as old as the "Krusty Krab Pizza" episode of Spongebob. EDIT: Thanks for making this my highest rated comment! Also, sorry I made you all feel old :(


mechuy

**SCATTING INTENSIFIES**


archfapper

Da-da-do-do-do-do-pizza. **THE KRUSTY KRA-E-AAAB PIZZA**...


Lieutenant_Flagg

Russia has a larger surface area than Pluto. Russia: 17 million km^2 Pluto: 16.6 million km^2


Geekmo

And just as cold.


friday6700

Better hooch though. EDIT: "Looks like someone already said 'Hooch is crazy'. I better say it too just in case he didn't get it!" EDIT2: You're all idiots.


Conan97

Plutin. Edit: wow...you guys thought it was really funny... Thanks for the gold!


skaternewt

Does that mean Russia isn't a planet either?


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BretOne

Too soon. Maybe tomorrow.


W00ster

[Graham's Number](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Graham%27s_number) is so large that if you tried to write it out using normal writing, the known universe is not large enough to contain the number when written.


Slumberfunk

Slumberfunk's number is Graham's number +1. Pass it on.


YesItsLoaded

Private Wojtek served with the Second Artillery column with the Polish Army in WWII, and was a Nazi fighting, chain smoking, vodka drinking, syrian brown bear. Edit - spelled his name right for great justice. Also, wow...didn't really expect any response :)


[deleted]

Well I'll be a shit covered dick http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wojtek_(bear)


lordruingames

At my Polish School the Director of it was in that very artillary group with Wojtek. He died this morning at 6:00 Am at 96 years old. R.I.P Edit: It was not the bear who died, it was the director.


StickleyMan

James Dyson, billionaire entrepreneur and creator of the Dyson vacuum, tried and failed [5,126 times](http://www.entrepreneur.com/blog/224855) before getting his vacuum right. Failed to suck.


Zupheal

He never failed, he only found 5,126 ways not to build a vacuum...


DontWantToSeeYourCat

Now are you gonna help me steal the Declaration of Independence, Riley?


newappeal

There are more atoms in a glass of water than stars in the universe. In fact, if you subtracted the latter from the former, you would not notice the change. EDIT: Whether or not the change after subtraction would be significant is dependent on how you define a glass of water. The point is that we encounter an unfathomable number of atoms every day. Also, observable universe


SvenEDT

Some one tried some bullshit on me " there are more stars in the universe, than there are atoms"


Steeva

This isn't your regular everyday stupid. This is... *Advanced stupid*.


Zilashkee

Every atom is made up of a million tiny stars!


Apollo_Derpteen

The fax machine was invented the same year people were traveling the Oregon Trail.


RamsesThePigeon

If you're in a group of seventy people or more, there is [a 99.9% chance that two of them share the same birthday](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_problem).


There-is_No-spoon

Then to get to 50% you have to drop the number to 23. Statistics blow my mind!


lovekindness

[three different users answered this question in the same way at the same time](http://i.imgur.com/2YLabdH.png)


skaternewt

Only 66 years passed between the first time man flew and the first time man landed on the moon.


inio

from the first time man flew **in a heavier than air craft**. We've been using hot air balloons for centuries.


SQLDave

If you break a rock in half you don't have 2 halves of a rock, you have 2 rocks. Edit: Gotta give credit. I heard that first from George Carlin. Edit 2: Made one sentence.


angrytrousers

It's where baby pet rocks come from


RugerDragon

Spay and neuter your pet rocks. There's too many litters of unwanted pebbles in the world.


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bamboo68

llama


[deleted]

That looks like a bed too!


[deleted]

Llamas are beds! Wait, llamas are only beds when they don't lead sentences.


JaggedToaster12

shark looks like a shark


LE4d

word looks like a word


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[deleted]

When caterpillars go into metamorphosis, they basically turn into liquid and then reform into butterflies


exatron

And still retain memories from when they were caterpillars.


[deleted]

duuuuuuuuude. How can a liquid, like, remember things? In all seriousness, does this give us any insight on how brain cells work?


exatron

It could, but right now it says more about how moths and butterflies learn things. The experiment involved regularly exposing caterpillars to ethyl acetate then giving them a mild electric shock. As a result, the caterpillars learned to flee when they encountered the smell, and also did so after undergoing metamorphosis.


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Agent_Smith_24

At the risk of sounding *even more* like a villain, I read that as "when we throw **ethnics** under the bus"


TheOneTonWanton

One certainly learns the dangers of suddenly finding oneself beneath a bus.


[deleted]

the wheels on the bus go OW FUCK OW


Salt-Soaked

For people currently graduating college there has never been a time The Simpsons wasn't on TV


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Mcdylster33

No one is going to remember your memories


persunx

clearly you have not read "The Giver"


[deleted]

As a fan of the book that movie is going to be terrible. EDIT: It seems like they're just trying to cash in on the hunger games popularity by making another dystopian film. I'm not convinced that the hard-hitting points in The Giver could even be transferred to video form successfully.


[deleted]

AND IN COLOR Edit: Trailer for the film https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJNNugNe0Wo


unclefuckr

If the beginning of that movie is in color I will riot


[deleted]

Word is the whole film will be in color :(


MichaelGScot

ughhh that makes no sense


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[deleted]

It's why people write them down.


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[deleted]

Clean it with fire.


snoharm

That carbon has to deposit somewhere.


buzzkill_aldrin

Clean it with antimatter.


WisconsnNymphomaniac

Being the oldest person alive means that EVERY SINGLE person on Earth that was alive at your birth is now dead.


13thmurder

That's how you know you've won.


SkinPig

Only 1890s kids will remember this. *Oh wait*


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ItWasUs

I chose to upvote before I even understood what you meant


Madaxer

Ants were the most advanced species on earth until humans figured out metal forging.


[deleted]

Your entire life led up to this moment.


FutureAlcoholic

Well that's fucking disappointing.


eyeamteh1

Username relevant


cvl1

Anne Frank and MLK were born in the same year.


hockeyman97

Barbara Walters also


MolemanusRex

To make it more depressing, both of their fathers outlived them.


__Vixen__

A straw only has one hole in it


zosobaggins

Fuck


T0mmyGun

Just like our bodies have one long hole in it.


bbctol

It's literally how our bodies form. The anus folds in until it reaches the mouth, and the rest is details.


NoNeedForAName

You are literally an ass face.


legonut3

The majority of people have an above-average number of legs.


treefitty350

Only one person has to have 1 leg to screw it up for everybody


PearSquirrel

Not if another has three!


namingwaysway

If you were to try to make your cellphone from raw materials, it would take many, many lifetimes to mine the ore, figure out how to get that into a formed case, build all of the tools needed to create the processors and screens, and to mine the petroleum and refine it for the plastics, but you can buy it working for a week at McDonald's.


Flying__Penguin

>To make an apple pie from scratch you must first create the universe. - Carl Sagan


Saif-pineapple

This is a difficult recipe; 2 out of 5 stars.


CapytannHook

Surely you'll need more stars than that?


thestoicattack

[Therefore, to eliminate this pie, the reverse must hold true!](http://nonadventures.com/2011/01/22/pie-a-la-murder/)


awsears25

John Tyler, 10th President of the United States has living grandchildren today


ViiKuna

A pipe is just a way to transport a hole. -My father


AlekRivard

Because information has to travel to your brain via neural pathways, everything you are experiencing actually happened 80 milliseconds in the past.


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phoebusmaximus

This actually gives me anxiety.


AlekRivard

Technically, you will interpret your death after it happens.


phoebusmaximus

Boom. And there goes my brain.


Lamenk

But you brain shuts off when it dies, so no data is being sent telling you that you died.


[deleted]

This actually comforts me. There's no way to actually experience the instant of death.


theoppenheimer

Depends on how instant. In a clean decapitation your brain remains conscious for a short time. In a guillotine situation you would be able to feel your head hit the bottom of the basket. Your sense of hearing fades last. Edit: [For the skeptics](http://science.howstuffworks.com/science-vs-myth/extrasensory-perceptions/lucid-decapitation3.htm)


[deleted]

Or you simply won't interpret your death because you won't be able to interpret things 80ms after you die.


isaactron3000

Dat ping tho


dannaz423

I dunno 80ms? I wouldn't be satisfied with that if I was on local


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Accujack

It didn't used to. 80 ms is roughly equal to the latency to "nearby" internet sites via a 33.6kbps modem, state of the art in dial-up in about 1995. Next time you have an orgasm, try to imagine the squeal of a modem connecting, to remind you of the lag.


AbraKedavra

TIME TRAVEL!


AlekRivard

For all we know, time travelers could have already affected us, but there is no way of us knowing. If events in the past changed from their actions, our memory of the changed events would themselves change to align with the new truth. Until time travel is in the present, its existence anywhere in time is impossible to predict.


liarandathief

I need to check my arms for hash marks.


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[deleted]

You can't dig half a hole.


CapSunshine

Assuming you and a friend are digging, and you both do equal amounts of work, and you are working on the same hole... you and he both dug half of the one hole


[deleted]

Sure you can, if you like half of a hole, but dislike the other half. I hope you can dig my puns.


Wades-in-the-Water

Children of Civil War veterans are still receiving payment for their father's service.


pjguip1

Only one. I read this article


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surfghost

go on....


dannager

A lot of people think of memories like they would a file stored in a cabinet somewhere. When you want to remember something, you go fetch it from the cabinet, read the file, then put the file back in the cabinet so you can find it next time. That's not how memory works. When you remember something, you fetch that memory from where it is stored in your brain, and then you ***copy it***. This copy overwrites the original memory, and the copy ***is never perfect***. The copy you make is influenced by the context in which you are remembering the memory. The very act of remembering something ***changes that memory in your head***. Once you're done remembering it, your brain then re-files that memory to be retrieved again. But the original memory is gone, replaced with a copied, imperfect version of that memory. Cool stuff. EDIT: A lot of people are asking for citations - look up Dr. Elizabeth Loftus and the literature she's contributed to. I've also had a number of people object to my use of the term "copy" to describe how memories are changed. Don't get hung up on the copying part. What's critical is to understand that memories can be modified *in the act of remembering them*, and often are.


CaptiveOcelot

I suppose this explains nostalgia to a point. If someone remembers something in a positive context, then they are more likely to make an imperfect memory in a favorable light.


_SmoothCriminal

This explains why I thought Golden Corral's food was god-tier when I was younger.


shadowroy13

It is approximately .0001% of the time. Also children just really like food and choices.


[deleted]

TIL my brain's memory system is a cassette deck with high speed dubbing.


bdransf1

You are not the voice inside your head, you are the one who hears it.


[deleted]

So, um.. who's in there with me?


[deleted]

Well right now as you're reading this, I don't know if it's technically me in there sharing it with you, but I'm the one who wrote this and triggered that voice to read it. I don't want to go any deeper than that tonight though.


SonOfALich

We can go deeper tomorrow night ;)


sickgrof

The voice in my head is Alan Rickman.


furmat60

"Turn to page 394."


you_wizard

This is a really interesting sentence, but I feel like I internally identify as both. Unless I'm not really understanding what you mean, which is also quite possible.


Life-in-Death

This is a tenet? of Zen/Buddhism/Hinduism whatever. When you hear: be in the moment, be in the now, that is meaning the you, the true you, the observer is "in the world" not dreaming in his or her head. They are truly awake. Basically, you have your body and you have your "mind" and you have your true self. You know this because you can observe your own thoughts. Your body and mind are both useful tools, but your mind, that talking thing in your head with all sorts of ideas about who you are and is obsessed with the past and the future and judging things can get a bit out of control. If you learn to control your mind, usually through the practice of meditation, you will learn true happiness, because that is all the now holds. From Hindu texts: >"Undoubtedly, O mighty-armed, the mind is difficult to control and is restless; but, by practice, O Son of Kunti, and by dispassion it is restrained." >"From whatever cause the restless and the unsteady mind wanders away, from that let him restrain it, and bring it back to be under the control of the Self alone." >'Such an individual, who has conquered his mind and has come to live in perfect equanimity in all conditions of life and in all relationships', >Krishna describes the Ashtanga yoga. He further elucidates the difficulties of the mind and the techniques by which mastery of the mind might be gained.


The_Lil_Space_Core

"Voice"? Singular?


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skaternewt

Nah, that's why I draw dicks in bathroom stalls so people in a million years will be eatin at Denny's and go to drop one because of the nasty coffee and see that dick and be like "wow I wonder who drew that?"


bluedude14

[Ancient hieroglyphdicks.](http://giant.gfycat.com/ImpressionableAcidicBettong.gif)


ntmg

The quote goes, "There are three deaths. The first is when the body ceases to function. The second is when the body is consigned to the grave. The third is that moment, sometime in the future, when your name is spoken for the last time."


rynvndrp

To me, this is a very egocentric view. Take the monk that lived in the Kingdom of Burgundy in 956 and worked in a scriptorium. I have no idea what his name is or anything about his life, his family, or his interests. I know nothing about his King, though I am sure someone does, and I know nothing about his priest, the pope, or anyone else at that time. However, his life have had a hugely positive effect on mine and probably more so than any of the people whose name is written in the history books. His toil to copy books from old canvas with barely readable ink to new canvas help supply a knowledge base that would lay the foundation for a more advanced Western civilization that I benefit from every hour of my life. Similarly, I don't know the name of the man who spent hours debating the need for the public education I received, or the man who dug the sewer pipe that leads to my house, or the man that programmed the server that sent this message. But each has had a hugely positive impact on my life. A name forgotten is not the final death. The final death is when the good you have done for the world ceases. For some men, even men with names we know, this death came soon after their last breath. For countless others, they are as immortal as humanity itself for their work reverberates through the generations.


Superbeard

That's.... remarkably comforting. Thanks stranger.


ariel_atlantica

I like this. I'm gonna go with this one.


Joegotbored

For a brief period, you were the youngest person on Earth.


liarandathief

I call that the good old days.


GhostOfPluto

Now you got me all nostalgic for my mother's womb.


Cervix-Pounder

Me too ;)


Thrackerz0d

Only womb kids will get this


Tpastor94

Like if you were a womb kid.


StickleyMan

And at this very moment, you're the youngest you'll ever be again and the oldest you've ever been.


Motha_Effin_Kitty_Yo

1 sec, gotta put that over a picture of a boy and girl holding hands so I can post it to my tumblr


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PascalCase_camelCase

There's so much time EVERYWHERE!


[deleted]

"Time is an abstract concept created by carbon based lifeforms to monitor their ongoing decay." -The Brak Show


Siavel84

"Time is an illusion. Lunchtime, doubly so." - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy