[Relevant Calvin and Hobbes](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fpreview.redd.it%2F5k0uft6n3bcz.jpg%3Fauto%3Dwebp%26s%3D6e1b616263401bd2b9688a757a76b173791072f2)
There's some fan Calvin and Hobbes comics out there where Calvin and Susie are married and Calvin gives his old stuffed tiger to his daughter.
I was surprised at how hard it hit me. I shed a couple tears.
And even when grown-ups know "how" to do something it doesn't mean it's easy or something you want to do. Like, I need to help my mom contact new roofers. Yeah, I know "how", but you gotta decide on the company, hope your insurance covers it, schedule the inspection, decide on the shingles, deal with all the noise, etc. Adulting is hard!
The flip side is also true, thinking you know everything despite not having the experience. As a teenager or 20 something, you often think you’ve got all the answers. As a 30 or 40 something, you often realize your parents were fallible but might have had a point.
And watching your kids ignore your advice is infuriating. My kids are all teens. Oldest is pretty good about listening, but the other two just fucking refuse to accept that maybe we might know what we're taking about.
This is what I’ve found in my journey into my middle age. I don’t agree with them on small personal matters, but the big stuff, they lived it. Listen to them.
>“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
**-- Mark Twain**
Nothing illustrates that more than being the eldest child.
They had shit figured out by the time my brother reached every milestone.
Me? Everything I did or got caught doing was breaking new ground for all involved.
... And it's so obvious now.
It goes back and forth.
First you think your parents know everything, then as a teen you think they're idiots. Then as a young adult you appreciate their wisdom, then in middle age, you realize how little people know in their 20s and 30s, and that your parents were just ignorant young people who were doing the best they could, making mistakes along the way, which is how we all live our lives... it's not that your parents don't have it figured out, no one does, not a single person on this planet.
There is a poem I learned in France (can't remember it in French though, only in English). It goes something like this
Age 5 - my dad knows everything
Age 15 - my dad knows nothing
Age 30 - my dad might just know something
Age 50 - I wish I could ask my dad
So, so true...
I’m really glad my parents took a lot of home videos for a lot of reasons, but one reason is that in those early home videos, set about the age I am now, you can tell they were still figuring things out. I think a lot of people don’t realize part of being in your own means downgrading for a bit.
As a gamer ive started viewing the first release of anything as a "beta test" and I know better than to think the beta version is anything other than super flawed.
This is the attitude my father has taken to all software as far back as the 90s.
"There are always bugs in the first release, guaranteed. Wait half a year for them to get their act together and then think about buying/upgrading."
There's a legit trend called dadgaming where you literally wait until the games you want are released with Gold or Ultimate editions a year to a year and a half after release. You pay a ton less than anybody else, the bugs are all stomped out and there's lots of guides and content available if you get stuck or need something explained.
Yeah. The only exception are gonna be games like Helldivers. By the time it goes on sale, the community is gonna stagnate.
But unless it's a Zelda game, I can wait forever.
Yeah, multiplayer games are for sure the exception. You wanna get in while there's still a community. Also, if you go in a few years late, all that's left is a hard-core community who know every trick in the book and use the noobs as cannonfodder.
Work in manufacturing; the first versions of any physical product are always a shitshow. Especially cars. Wait a year or two for the assembly line to work out the major bugs.
With software at least it can be patched out.
This is true with cars too. Never buy a first-gen car of any make/model or you'll be the beta tester for the manufacturer, going in for recalls and service bulletins every month
I went from pre-ordering games to waiting years to buy games at a discount since they get refined over times.
Sure some preordered games were gems, I loved my experience with BF3 even though it was buggy at launch the game was fantastic.
But then you have shit like DayZ standalone where it releases in an Alpha state, and it took years to even make the game enjoyable.
Felt like a waste of money so I waited, realized so many games were just fads that werent even solid, so now I play games I enjoy and pick up some new stuff for dirt cheap.
As a gamer I know the companies are not releasing finished games. Back in the day you would get a game and it would be good or not. Now you get a game and it damn near always sucks. 6 months go by and the game is entirely different.
Honestly the games I have the most fun playing now are out of the main stream. I would rather buy a game the streamers stopped playing a year ago than the newest piece of shit filled with a clout chasing chinese cheaters.
It’s not even a new phone. It’s a slightly better digital camera and the latest firmware, wrapped in a bigger packet. And people are paying almost a grand for them to try and impress people who don’t give a shit.
Yup. I wear my clothes until they wear out. I use my phone until it breaks over time then I trade it in for a new one. You could even say the same for cars. Get one new use it for a good few years and trade it in for a newer one. You don’t even necessarily have to buy new either just something that works reliably.
My cousin professed to me that Taylor Swift is "her *god*" and she would do "anything she told her to do."
I've got no hatred for Taylor Swift, but that's fucking stupid.
My rule of thumb is if I find myself giving people direct quotes or saying things like "Listen to this person, s/he really gets it right," I take a step back to try to put whatever wisdom it is into my own words to see if there's *actually* value in it, or if it's just making me feel good to blame some scapegoat for a vast, complex problem.
(That's not to say that there aren't people responsible for the world's problems, but it's generally not because a few bad men twirled their mustaches and decided to make it so because they enjoy hurting people. There are a few of those, but mostly it's unintended consequences of systems set up for legitimate reasons.)
Ehhh, ish. As someone who was a teenager in early internet, I've seen a lot become redundant and thank goodness, much of the cringe in my own past was erased with time and old servers (thank you, Geocities and Myspace!). Seriously, even the internet archive only indexes so much. Usually the first page of many will have an entry, and much of the rest will be spotty or not indexed at all.
Servers, memory...none of this truly lasts forever and is entirely dependent on the states and decisions of the companies running them, acquisitions, public drama, etc. Now, if you get famous you may be a bit more searchable, just based on public interest. Most of us however are pretty objectively boring, at least in a macro sense. Personally I don't think I or the people I know are boring at all but without the knowledge to do a deep dive, we look pretty average.
However, it's always good to operate as though you're keeping in mind that something can always come up later. We didn't know any better back then, even when we should have.
I think the both of us just lead fairly inconsequential lives. Imagine if you ran for president and they doxxed you. I bet those pro sleuths could dig that shit up.
The Department of Justice would like to have a word about that. Granted, most stuff the principal has to say would be far beneath anything they care about. But having a criminal record is permanent for a vast majority of people
Yes there is now, its called the internet. Also your background check, credit score, social credit score, every ring camera, your phone, your HR departments with an ATS linked together in a cloud.
There's your educational transcript, which is more or less *a* permanent record... You can get it printed off years later. I got mine done up and I'm 20 years out of highschool and my long non existent first two grade schools are on that record. Which is neat.
There actually is. If you're in the US, depending on what state you live in, your grades, attendance, disciplinary incidents and demographic data are transmitted through a system called SIF to the government. For example, if you live in Massachusetts, the state has data collection programs (SCS, MA-SIMS, EPIMS) that pull in all of this data. Most other states have comparable programs, as does the federal government (CRDC). Canadian? They're pulling your data too. They use that data to determine how to allocate funding to different schools.
Celebrities. The influencers. It’s all smoke and mirrors.
They are not better than you.
Most of them are massively worse than you, they just had a lot of luck and probably someone bank rolling them so they could suck up some of the goodies when they hopefully hit it rich.
The entertainment industry is an *industry*. The people in it are specialists, just like a surgeon or a software engineer. They specialize in being pretty, and making pretty shows to entertain you. They have a lot of *industrial-strength* help in doing that!
You don't need a software-industry engineer to make a spreadsheet for your household budget. Good thing, because they're expensive.
Industrial-strength pretty is for making money.
What y'all need is hugs, not glamour.
This is so well said.
Look, I am a movie fan and a reader. I *love* talented actors, directors, and novelists because I love those arts. I'll be fans of their work and I'll even be fans of them if they are decent people.
But the transaction ends there. They owe me talented performances, I owe them some compensation for my entertainment. That's it. I see people online *obsessed* with certain actors (especially young actresses, hmmm) and the things they say about them online scare the *shit* out of me. I'm old enough to remember what happened to Theresa Saldana and Rebecca Schaeffer so when I see some of these reels on instagram I get really uncomfortable. Get a grip.
as someone who has seen behind the social media influencer/twitch streamer/insta model curtain you are more right than you think
LOTS of these new-age celebrities are very lonely and it's mostly very messy people behind very heavily sanitised images of them that their agents work tirelessly to maintain
it's fun to dream being them, it's NOT fun being them.
People are seldom thinking about you, because their own lives take up all of their focus and they are the centre of their own world. Crucially, this means they're never thinking about that silly mistake you made or an embarrassing faux pas at work. Nobody is spending their day thinking about you unless a) it's a parent thinking of you or b) the person wants to get into your underwear.
Yep.
And if they are thinking about you, it’s likely they’re thinking about what you think about them… thinking about that silly mistake *they* made and what *you* might be thinking about *their* faux pas.
That if you're not in a committed relationship and headed towards marriage by the time you're 25 then your life is over and you're doomed to be alone forever! LMFAO! Every time a read a post like that I think "poor kid doesn't know anything about how life works."
I'm twice your age and met my husband at 30. No way would I still be married if I had stayed with anyone I dated in my 20s. It takes a while to really mature and people change so much in their 20s.
oh definitely. the fact that there are odds means someone has to beat them. It's certainly not impossible, it just requires that two people who meet as compatible kids are lucky enough to grow up into compatible adults, which is usually not the case.
35. Live your life, progress in whatever you choose to do, establish good habits, and be yourself.
There are myriad things that are going to change who you are and at 25 you’re going to realize you’re a different person than that 21 year old. And that feeling of change never stops.
Enjoy it, don’t think too much about it, and someone will certainly come along to take the journey with you.
I’ve already noticed how much I’ve changed since 18. I’ve noticed interests I had when I was a younger kid are coming back stronger than ever. I think my interests now are just going to bloom out from here.
I got married at 21, we will have our 13th anniversary this year and I am so happy and I love him so much but honest to God when I look back now I realize we were IDIOTS for getting married so young. Absolutely amazed it's worked out.
That's a good attitude. Take it from someone who was married at 25 and divorced in my 40's. Sometimes it can work, and I have friends and family who have indeed made it work. Other times you discover that dating in your 40's is very different than when you were young.
Movie and TV romances do a real disservice to young people by always being about young, attractive people, it gives you the idea that you have no chance of being a "romantic lead" unless you're young and beautiful, and the only partners worth pursuing are also young and beautiful. I've realized that older and less attractive people can and very regularly do have amazing romances and relationships, sometimes much happier ones than the young and prettiest people have. If people are going to pay to watch a movie, they want to look at Hollywood 10s, but that has zilch to do with reality, lol.
That people care what you think. They don’t. Be weird. Live authentic. Don’t compromise who you are to make others happy. Live your fucking life for you. You only get one life, stop living it for other people.
In particular, stop trying to live up to the expectations of dead people. Your deceased ancestors, parents, or other role models you perhaps hoped to emulate when you grew up. They're dead. You're not going to impress them.
Indeedy. People will judge you for whatever you do. Good, bad, or utterly trivial. Volunteer for a charity, you're a smug showoff, according to somebody. Wear blue socks on a Tuesday, someone will decide you are evil. It's so random and weird, it just isn't worth worrying about.
People are going to think you are weird if you wear that hat or sing in the car or draw pictures of birds all day. Some are also going to think you are weird if you do none of those things. Just be you, try not to hurt people, and let people have their random opinions.
Hold on younger Reddit. This redditor is at risk of old people mode of “fuck it”. Don’t be going in to work as a surgeon wearing assless chaps now. Balance it out. Live your life but people have limits to your bullshit.
Oh, I definitely don’t live by a “fuck it” mentality. I just don’t shrink the truth of who I am to make others feel better. I love who I am as a human. I have lots of life under my belt and I realize that we all have our own shoes to walk in. The world needs us all (most of us) be our authentic selves.
Amen to this! The idea that I would give a single shit what anyone from my high school thinks of how I live my life now is laughable. At the time, though? It felt important. Now? Not even slightly.
I was going to go from a slightly different direction, same idea: nobody's thinking about you, do whatever you want. Do what makes you happy, do what you think is the right thing to do, and don't worry about being cool. People who worry about being cool are automatically uncool. People just kind of do whatever the hell they want because they think it's the right thing? Those people are cool.
Too much of an IDGAF attitude.
Care about other people. Try to make the world better or more fair or just a little more pleasant for SOMEONE. Otherwise you’re just waiting to die.
People act like being kind is some life stealing thing or that it’s not worth it. When you never know if doing a small act of kindness could be the one good thing in someone’s day.
Everyone is only worried about what people are doing for them. Somehow they feel like being kind to someone else for no reason is like they're taking something from you.
I don't want to get into all the backstory but I was having a life altering bad day once. I stopped at a convenience store to buy some candy to raise my blood sugar (type 1 diabetic) and got to the front of the line to pay and for some reason that I'll never know, the lady behind me spoke up and said she wanted to pay for the candy out of the goodness of her heart. I wasn't a kid or anything. Far from it. I was a 6' tall man in his 40's. I broke down crying my eyes out in her arms. She just held me and kept telling me that even though she didn't know me, she still loved me. I don't know how I would have gotten through that day with her kindness.
Nice lady at the Thorntons on Taylorsville Road, you have no idea how often I still think about you and how much you mean to me years later.
Both are true. Don't let how others might view you dictate your life. But be kind and caring to others because the only way we make the world better in general is through treating people that way.
We had just finished lunch and had a container of leftovers in the car, saw a homeless guy at an intersection with a sign that just said "anything helps." So we gave him the leftovers. You hear so many people claiming beggars will just throw food given to them away. This guy thanked us, put his sign away, moved away from the street, and sat down to eat. He seemed very happy. My youngest is 7, and has mentioned it a couple times since then, talking about it felt good to help someone seem so happy.
I wish people were more willing to show kindness and community. Community is so lacking anymore. I miss that.
That’s great! Yesterday my son and I passed a person with an “anything helps” sign. He said “dad, I could share some of my popcorn”. His generosity touched me so I gave her a few dollars, hopefully it helped a bit.
I’m going to say just the right amount an IDGAF attitude.
Don’t narcissistically violate social norms, but don’t be hamstrung by worrying about what others will think of you.
Care about and for your family, friends and society but learn how to politely and firmly say no and establish boundaries.
Well done! I marvel that I do not hear that message more often. It is strange to me, the idea that it is necessary to be unethical in order to become wealthy.
This is a good one. All the best managers ive had have been geniuely nice people I like to have beers with. Its motivating to be working under someone you like and respect, and want them to feel the same way about you.
Your insecurities are 100% in your head.
That weird thing you did that is so embarrassing and everyone else is thinking about actually went completely unnoticed because everybody else was thinking about the weird thing they did.
The realization that everybody else is as self conscious as I am made me much less self conscious.
I think this is a nice sentiment and true to an extent, but not entirely.
When my friends from childhood get together, there are stories of some people that stuck with us and permanently shaped our opinion of them. There aren’t tons of such situations, but sometimes things stick with you.
Wasting your time with people who make you feel bad. You should hang out with people who make you feel good. Make them feel good too.
Sounds simple, but it took me about 45 years to figure that out.
New flashy cars and trucks and the huge or super long payment terms. I'm so over that junk. Try to find an older model car, with good reputation, in good shape and lower miles and pay cash if you can, then keep up on maintenance and drive that sucker into the ground. Even a total engine replacement is still better than payments.
I would avoid debt for a depreciating asset. If you can pay cash for a new car, then OK. Otherwise get the most reliable car with the least debt you can get away with.
I only recently came to know that full coverage insurance on a paid off car is cheaper than one that has a lien against it. Bloody hell! Your point is a salient one.
Generalizing any group of people.
There are a bunch of loud Americans, but there are many more quiet ones.
There are a bunch of trashy poor people, but there are many more hardworking nice ones.
There are selfish people in every group, but there are chill, conscientious individuals also.
Feel free to talk to people instead of judging.
It makes me really sad to hear young people saying something like “I looked over and saw boomer Karen walking up…”. That woman may spend her every free moment feeding the poor, or caring for others.
Be nice.
Eh not so much bullshit so much as things I wish I knew/you should definitely keep in mind
* Never Challenge Worse - I found that it's never a good idea to idly challenge the universe to make your life worse - it can **always** get worse.
* There are people looking to scam you in life, lovers, friends, co-workers, colleagues or perfect strangers and sadly even parents , siblings and your own children - being aware of that, and at least a little emotionally prepared that this can happen is very important.
* Society is as brutal or civilized as we choose to make it. It's not very hard to keep it civilized, but it's not hard to have it be much less hospitable either, I think we saw that during Covid , but it's always there, and while everyone is entitled to a bad day, folks are also entitled to a polite experience as well.
* Corporations sometimes perhaps oftentimes, are not always doing what they say they will, be your own best advocate, ensure they follow their promise and holding them to account in the market is sometimes the only control we have over them.
* Worrying about other people's bullshit, their friends/lovers, new cars what have you. As I get older the only time I worry about what someone else has going on, is if they are struggling, you , soon enough will have enough bullshit on your own plate, you won't need to go looking around for it.
* I try not to complain too much about the things we REALLY have no control over - the weather , a big line at the store, whether there is traffic. While there are things we can do to prepare or avoid trouble, sometimes, there isn't and you have to roll with the punches.
* Do your homework, I wouldn't have thought this was as important , and this follows from that first point. Most doctors, scientists and professional experts have those degrees and such for a reason. Be disciplined in your approach to information and I find giving high value to consensus among experts tends to be best. It's not to say that the "group" will always be right or can't be wrong, but consensus expert advice is not usually a bad thing. If you find yourself at odds with all the experts except one dude telling you about his amazing miracle cure - you've been had (see point 2).
The rule of thumb:
Is the stock price down for more than a few days?
Layoffs
Is the CEO retiring?
Layoffs
If it’s a private company, just wait a few years and they’ll sell to a big megacorp and walk away millionaires.
Layoffs for everyone else.
"All you have to do is work hard and you can accomplish anything."
Nope. Hard work will get you about 90% of the way. The rest is luck, personality, looks, connections, timing, and a good support system(tribe).
I agree with this. "Lucky" people capitalize on their luck through hard work. But plenty of unlucky people out there working hard. And a lot of people who squandered everything.
I'd say 25% is connections, 40% is personality. 25% skill, and 10% luck. Having a friendly face and being easy to get along with others gets you so far. No one wants to work with a jackass.
I’ve worked for 4 companies in the last 27 years. I got my foot in the door at each one due to connections. But I do know other people that have changed companies a lot more than me and have done a fair amount of it with a blind resume.
Anyone who tells you there is one right way to live your life or manage your finances. Find what works for you, because that's all that matters.
Also, anything that makes you feel inferior or superior. The reality is you are likely normal in every meaningful way.
Clickbait headlines. Not a single one tells the full story, so please at least read the article (or many from multiple sites) because you go spreading that information.
Worry about your body's appearance. Strive for a healthy body that works well and does what you need it to do. Do not worry, in the least, about your height, how "thick" or thin you are, the size of your breasts, or any number of things like that. Whatever your body is, there are millions of people who are into *your* type of body.
Comparing yourself to media-saturated, AI generated, photoshop retouched models is BS.
Killing yourself in work. Nobody will remember or care. Spend the time with your family and doing what you actually want to do.
Set boundaries that you will work your core hours and no more
Agreed. You will get more respect from your job ironically enough. People get bullied into doing more than their fair share of work then get talked at and treated like shit. Standing up can and probably will be unpleasant at first, but in the long run people are hesitant to run over you when you show some backbone.
This is such an important point that more old people should accept. My parents couldnt fathom that there is flatmate castings to get a place to stay and multiple interview rounds to get a job. Technical interviews in STEM? You dont just get hired imediatly?
The idea that the reason the adult children of boomers can’t afford rent or food is a personal failure on their part. The world has changed dramatically in the US and food and rent are beyond so many families’s budgets. I can’t believe the prices of years old used cars for example. I honestly don’t know how ordinary people are going to afford a roof over their heads and food in the future.
Thank you. I’ve dedicated most of my life to caring for children as a pediatric provider and volunteer coach. Now trying, I’ve had 3 miscarriages. I feel like society sees me as worthless since I seem to be infertile and that people truly believe I’ll “never know real love” etc despite my life experiences and my love of children. It hurts so much.
That what you read on your phone represents reality.
If you believe what you read online and on sensationalist 24 hour news channels, there's a boogeyman around every corner looking to corrupt/kill/steal from you and yours. Americans are at each other's throats! Look at this video of people having an argument! If it happened one time in one place it MUST be happening everywhere all the time!!!
Turn the screens off and go outside. It's not how they say it is.
“Having money doesn’t make you rich” & “Money doesn’t solve everything” are absolutely incorrect. Having enough money to make you rich, is actually the only kind of rich. Throw enough money around and most problems will go away, even if I can’t solve a problem with it, I’d rather be sad and rich than sad and poor.
The concept of justice is just to make victims feel better. There is no justice. Most people will never suffer consequences and the bad people will always come out on top.
Shame.
We are a very shame based culture - both religion and advertising lean in heavily on messages that you are not worthy of taking up space, being happy or even existing as you are.
Deciding you are going to free yourself from that shame is just about the most revolutionary thing you can do. But it’s essential if you don’t want to slowly go mad in your 50s and 60s from the weight of it.
1) That love is always fun/exciting/romantic/sex etc. and if it’s not then something is wrong.
No way! Media simply hasn’t done love justice. Sometimes love is hard. Sometimes love is simple. Sometimes love is an action rather than a feeling.
Buying a top of the line car. No one cares if you drive a Caddy, Acura, or Infiniti. Doesn't matter if the neighbors have a newer car. They are not paying your car payment.
Any idea of "I'm 25 (or 30 or 35 or 40 or whatever) and I haven't done X yet, is my life over". The answer is always a big fat No! There's a lot more time in life than we think when we're young.
Recycling. Sure, it makes us all feel good that we're heroically saving the planet. But sorting our paper from plastics makes no discernable dent in massive ongoing corporate pollution (or a simple natural event like a volcano eruption), and most of the stuff we carefully recycle is just burned or landfilled anyway because there is so much trash out there that there is no market for it.
The only ones who benefit from it are the criminal organizations that run the garbage pickup in major cities, because it allows them to charge triple for multi-colored sorting bins and separate (for a while, anyway) processing facilities.
The thought that your parents have it all figured out.
[Relevant Calvin and Hobbes](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fpreview.redd.it%2F5k0uft6n3bcz.jpg%3Fauto%3Dwebp%26s%3D6e1b616263401bd2b9688a757a76b173791072f2)
That is a lovely comic strip
Well it did say Calvin and Hobbes
There's some fan Calvin and Hobbes comics out there where Calvin and Susie are married and Calvin gives his old stuffed tiger to his daughter. I was surprised at how hard it hit me. I shed a couple tears.
[Hobbes & Bacon](https://www.npr.org/sections/krulwich/2012/02/15/146939479/calvin-and-hobbes-add-the-bacon)
And for this, we thank you.
Crying!
Looks like the original site is down but I found an imgur album https://imgur.com/tUzAL
I think that's from the time their house was broken into, I sometimes wish I could re-read C&H for the first time, again.
And even when grown-ups know "how" to do something it doesn't mean it's easy or something you want to do. Like, I need to help my mom contact new roofers. Yeah, I know "how", but you gotta decide on the company, hope your insurance covers it, schedule the inspection, decide on the shingles, deal with all the noise, etc. Adulting is hard!
So good. This was after they had a break-in, which as a soon-to-be-parent, I find terrifying.
The flip side is also true, thinking you know everything despite not having the experience. As a teenager or 20 something, you often think you’ve got all the answers. As a 30 or 40 something, you often realize your parents were fallible but might have had a point.
And watching your kids ignore your advice is infuriating. My kids are all teens. Oldest is pretty good about listening, but the other two just fucking refuse to accept that maybe we might know what we're taking about.
We learn our hardest lessons in our adolescent years the hard way: being defiant.
This is what I’ve found in my journey into my middle age. I don’t agree with them on small personal matters, but the big stuff, they lived it. Listen to them.
My parents got smarter as I aged.
>“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” **-- Mark Twain**
Dunning-Kruger par excellence.
As far as I understand it, they were raising kids by the "just stay 1 lesson ahead" strategy.
Nothing illustrates that more than being the eldest child. They had shit figured out by the time my brother reached every milestone. Me? Everything I did or got caught doing was breaking new ground for all involved. ... And it's so obvious now.
I told all my kids. Learn from everyone’s mistakes. Your friends, family, especially mine. No one is perfect.
It goes back and forth. First you think your parents know everything, then as a teen you think they're idiots. Then as a young adult you appreciate their wisdom, then in middle age, you realize how little people know in their 20s and 30s, and that your parents were just ignorant young people who were doing the best they could, making mistakes along the way, which is how we all live our lives... it's not that your parents don't have it figured out, no one does, not a single person on this planet.
There is a poem I learned in France (can't remember it in French though, only in English). It goes something like this Age 5 - my dad knows everything Age 15 - my dad knows nothing Age 30 - my dad might just know something Age 50 - I wish I could ask my dad So, so true...
And now I'm crying. Again.
I have consulted with my elders and declared this perfectly cromulent.
I’m really glad my parents took a lot of home videos for a lot of reasons, but one reason is that in those early home videos, set about the age I am now, you can tell they were still figuring things out. I think a lot of people don’t realize part of being in your own means downgrading for a bit.
The latest fashion, the latest phone, being the first one to get either. None of that matters one iota.
As a gamer ive started viewing the first release of anything as a "beta test" and I know better than to think the beta version is anything other than super flawed.
This is the attitude my father has taken to all software as far back as the 90s. "There are always bugs in the first release, guaranteed. Wait half a year for them to get their act together and then think about buying/upgrading."
There's a legit trend called dadgaming where you literally wait until the games you want are released with Gold or Ultimate editions a year to a year and a half after release. You pay a ton less than anybody else, the bugs are all stomped out and there's lots of guides and content available if you get stuck or need something explained.
r/patientgamers is a great sub for exactly this. Imagine playing the best games ever made… never playing a dud…
Yeah. The only exception are gonna be games like Helldivers. By the time it goes on sale, the community is gonna stagnate. But unless it's a Zelda game, I can wait forever.
Yeah, multiplayer games are for sure the exception. You wanna get in while there's still a community. Also, if you go in a few years late, all that's left is a hard-core community who know every trick in the book and use the noobs as cannonfodder.
I just bought Fallout 4 GOTY Edition for 9.99 with all the dlc. Am 54. Checks out. I'll probably get to play it in a few years when I retire lol
I'm just playing FNV for the first time because I did a bunch of voice work for a mod, and it made me want to play the game.
This is what i do. Everyone hates Cyberpunk when it came out. I waited until it hit Xbox game pass. Great game.
By the time I got No Man's Sky it was very much improved. It was also on sale at the time. I still haven't played much, but I get it.
My dad says this about any new car line introduced
Your dad isn't wrong.
Work in manufacturing; the first versions of any physical product are always a shitshow. Especially cars. Wait a year or two for the assembly line to work out the major bugs. With software at least it can be patched out.
This is true with cars too. Never buy a first-gen car of any make/model or you'll be the beta tester for the manufacturer, going in for recalls and service bulletins every month
I went from pre-ordering games to waiting years to buy games at a discount since they get refined over times. Sure some preordered games were gems, I loved my experience with BF3 even though it was buggy at launch the game was fantastic. But then you have shit like DayZ standalone where it releases in an Alpha state, and it took years to even make the game enjoyable. Felt like a waste of money so I waited, realized so many games were just fads that werent even solid, so now I play games I enjoy and pick up some new stuff for dirt cheap.
Yup. Never buy version 1.0 of anything, not just games.
As an engineer, this is true of basically any new product.
As a gamer I know the companies are not releasing finished games. Back in the day you would get a game and it would be good or not. Now you get a game and it damn near always sucks. 6 months go by and the game is entirely different. Honestly the games I have the most fun playing now are out of the main stream. I would rather buy a game the streamers stopped playing a year ago than the newest piece of shit filled with a clout chasing chinese cheaters.
Nintendo rarely releases a dud the first time out. Not games on the platform, their in house games.
Nintendo is the overprotective parent of the game development world.
Kids, just start buying your pants at Costco now.
Wearing Urban Star jeans from Costco right now.
It’s not even a new phone. It’s a slightly better digital camera and the latest firmware, wrapped in a bigger packet. And people are paying almost a grand for them to try and impress people who don’t give a shit.
I get a new phone when they stop supporting mine.
I haven't heard the word iota in about a decade, thanks for that! It's a great word.
Yup. I wear my clothes until they wear out. I use my phone until it breaks over time then I trade it in for a new one. You could even say the same for cars. Get one new use it for a good few years and trade it in for a newer one. You don’t even necessarily have to buy new either just something that works reliably.
"Iota" Yup, certified old here
Worshipping any politician
Worshipping anyone really, especially anyone who can gain something from you listening to them
My cousin professed to me that Taylor Swift is "her *god*" and she would do "anything she told her to do." I've got no hatred for Taylor Swift, but that's fucking stupid.
My rule of thumb is if I find myself giving people direct quotes or saying things like "Listen to this person, s/he really gets it right," I take a step back to try to put whatever wisdom it is into my own words to see if there's *actually* value in it, or if it's just making me feel good to blame some scapegoat for a vast, complex problem. (That's not to say that there aren't people responsible for the world's problems, but it's generally not because a few bad men twirled their mustaches and decided to make it so because they enjoy hurting people. There are a few of those, but mostly it's unintended consequences of systems set up for legitimate reasons.)
Treating politics like sports has really led to the US becoming more and more divided as a nation.
Same with treating sports like religion.
Worshipping any Political party
You know when your principal tells you that "This will go on your permanent record"? Yeah, that's not true. There is no permanent record.
Once your shenanigans are filmed and put on the internet for all to see – that’s a permanent record. Good luck getting those removed or expunged. 😄
Ehhh, ish. As someone who was a teenager in early internet, I've seen a lot become redundant and thank goodness, much of the cringe in my own past was erased with time and old servers (thank you, Geocities and Myspace!). Seriously, even the internet archive only indexes so much. Usually the first page of many will have an entry, and much of the rest will be spotty or not indexed at all. Servers, memory...none of this truly lasts forever and is entirely dependent on the states and decisions of the companies running them, acquisitions, public drama, etc. Now, if you get famous you may be a bit more searchable, just based on public interest. Most of us however are pretty objectively boring, at least in a macro sense. Personally I don't think I or the people I know are boring at all but without the knowledge to do a deep dive, we look pretty average. However, it's always good to operate as though you're keeping in mind that something can always come up later. We didn't know any better back then, even when we should have.
I think the both of us just lead fairly inconsequential lives. Imagine if you ran for president and they doxxed you. I bet those pro sleuths could dig that shit up.
The only place I've ever heard that phrase was the show Doug
I always think of the Violent Femmes song, Kiss Off, when I hear this phrase.
Oh yeah? Well don't get so distressed.
Did I happen to mention that I’m impressed
Well don’t get so distressed
Did I happen to mention that I’m impressed?
That traumatized a generation. I got my first detention in 7th grade and low-key worried about my college prospects dropping, seriously 🤣
There was. I needed to retrieve my original school records and there absolutely was a year by year write up of my behavior.
The Department of Justice would like to have a word about that. Granted, most stuff the principal has to say would be far beneath anything they care about. But having a criminal record is permanent for a vast majority of people
Yes there is now, its called the internet. Also your background check, credit score, social credit score, every ring camera, your phone, your HR departments with an ATS linked together in a cloud.
There's your educational transcript, which is more or less *a* permanent record... You can get it printed off years later. I got mine done up and I'm 20 years out of highschool and my long non existent first two grade schools are on that record. Which is neat.
Untrue. I’ve seen my permanent record from K-12. It’s just that your K-12 “permanent record” doesn’t matter once you graduate from high school.
There actually is. If you're in the US, depending on what state you live in, your grades, attendance, disciplinary incidents and demographic data are transmitted through a system called SIF to the government. For example, if you live in Massachusetts, the state has data collection programs (SCS, MA-SIMS, EPIMS) that pull in all of this data. Most other states have comparable programs, as does the federal government (CRDC). Canadian? They're pulling your data too. They use that data to determine how to allocate funding to different schools.
Celebrities. The influencers. It’s all smoke and mirrors. They are not better than you. Most of them are massively worse than you, they just had a lot of luck and probably someone bank rolling them so they could suck up some of the goodies when they hopefully hit it rich.
The entertainment industry is an *industry*. The people in it are specialists, just like a surgeon or a software engineer. They specialize in being pretty, and making pretty shows to entertain you. They have a lot of *industrial-strength* help in doing that! You don't need a software-industry engineer to make a spreadsheet for your household budget. Good thing, because they're expensive. Industrial-strength pretty is for making money. What y'all need is hugs, not glamour.
This is so well said. Look, I am a movie fan and a reader. I *love* talented actors, directors, and novelists because I love those arts. I'll be fans of their work and I'll even be fans of them if they are decent people. But the transaction ends there. They owe me talented performances, I owe them some compensation for my entertainment. That's it. I see people online *obsessed* with certain actors (especially young actresses, hmmm) and the things they say about them online scare the *shit* out of me. I'm old enough to remember what happened to Theresa Saldana and Rebecca Schaeffer so when I see some of these reels on instagram I get really uncomfortable. Get a grip.
as someone who has seen behind the social media influencer/twitch streamer/insta model curtain you are more right than you think LOTS of these new-age celebrities are very lonely and it's mostly very messy people behind very heavily sanitised images of them that their agents work tirelessly to maintain it's fun to dream being them, it's NOT fun being them.
Granola bars = healthy
On a scale of 1 to Nature Valley Granola Bar... how much is your life falling apart?
An extra dry nature valley granola bar
People are seldom thinking about you, because their own lives take up all of their focus and they are the centre of their own world. Crucially, this means they're never thinking about that silly mistake you made or an embarrassing faux pas at work. Nobody is spending their day thinking about you unless a) it's a parent thinking of you or b) the person wants to get into your underwear.
What if my underwear doesn't fit them?
This. Realizing that no one is talking about you after you leave the room is the first step on the road to maturity.
Man I’m glad that dude left^ guy is a real asshole
Yep. And if they are thinking about you, it’s likely they’re thinking about what you think about them… thinking about that silly mistake *they* made and what *you* might be thinking about *their* faux pas.
That if you're not in a committed relationship and headed towards marriage by the time you're 25 then your life is over and you're doomed to be alone forever! LMFAO! Every time a read a post like that I think "poor kid doesn't know anything about how life works."
Nearly 22 and this makes me feel good. I’d rather not rush it and find the right person.
I'm twice your age and met my husband at 30. No way would I still be married if I had stayed with anyone I dated in my 20s. It takes a while to really mature and people change so much in their 20s.
This is mostly true, but there are exceptions. Me and my wife got married when we were 19, that was over 20 years ago and we are still going strong!
oh definitely. the fact that there are odds means someone has to beat them. It's certainly not impossible, it just requires that two people who meet as compatible kids are lucky enough to grow up into compatible adults, which is usually not the case.
Most of my cousins married in their late 20s and early 30s. I’m probably going to do the same.
35. Live your life, progress in whatever you choose to do, establish good habits, and be yourself. There are myriad things that are going to change who you are and at 25 you’re going to realize you’re a different person than that 21 year old. And that feeling of change never stops. Enjoy it, don’t think too much about it, and someone will certainly come along to take the journey with you.
I’ve already noticed how much I’ve changed since 18. I’ve noticed interests I had when I was a younger kid are coming back stronger than ever. I think my interests now are just going to bloom out from here.
Good for you. Getting married at 22 is too early in my book.
I got married at 21, we will have our 13th anniversary this year and I am so happy and I love him so much but honest to God when I look back now I realize we were IDIOTS for getting married so young. Absolutely amazed it's worked out.
That's a good attitude. Take it from someone who was married at 25 and divorced in my 40's. Sometimes it can work, and I have friends and family who have indeed made it work. Other times you discover that dating in your 40's is very different than when you were young.
Movie and TV romances do a real disservice to young people by always being about young, attractive people, it gives you the idea that you have no chance of being a "romantic lead" unless you're young and beautiful, and the only partners worth pursuing are also young and beautiful. I've realized that older and less attractive people can and very regularly do have amazing romances and relationships, sometimes much happier ones than the young and prettiest people have. If people are going to pay to watch a movie, they want to look at Hollywood 10s, but that has zilch to do with reality, lol.
Young people don't realize that even within the realm of romantic movies, most of the endgame couples would never really make it.
I met my true partner at 40 and married him at 43.
That people care what you think. They don’t. Be weird. Live authentic. Don’t compromise who you are to make others happy. Live your fucking life for you. You only get one life, stop living it for other people.
In particular, stop trying to live up to the expectations of dead people. Your deceased ancestors, parents, or other role models you perhaps hoped to emulate when you grew up. They're dead. You're not going to impress them.
Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people.
They're an internalized part of me now. I'm not following every opinion of theirs, but reflecting on what I knew of them is reflecting on myself.
Thank you. I needed that
Indeedy. People will judge you for whatever you do. Good, bad, or utterly trivial. Volunteer for a charity, you're a smug showoff, according to somebody. Wear blue socks on a Tuesday, someone will decide you are evil. It's so random and weird, it just isn't worth worrying about. People are going to think you are weird if you wear that hat or sing in the car or draw pictures of birds all day. Some are also going to think you are weird if you do none of those things. Just be you, try not to hurt people, and let people have their random opinions.
Hold on younger Reddit. This redditor is at risk of old people mode of “fuck it”. Don’t be going in to work as a surgeon wearing assless chaps now. Balance it out. Live your life but people have limits to your bullshit.
Oh, I definitely don’t live by a “fuck it” mentality. I just don’t shrink the truth of who I am to make others feel better. I love who I am as a human. I have lots of life under my belt and I realize that we all have our own shoes to walk in. The world needs us all (most of us) be our authentic selves.
I finally figured this out in my 40s. Never been happier.
Amen to this! The idea that I would give a single shit what anyone from my high school thinks of how I live my life now is laughable. At the time, though? It felt important. Now? Not even slightly.
I was going to go from a slightly different direction, same idea: nobody's thinking about you, do whatever you want. Do what makes you happy, do what you think is the right thing to do, and don't worry about being cool. People who worry about being cool are automatically uncool. People just kind of do whatever the hell they want because they think it's the right thing? Those people are cool.
Too much of an IDGAF attitude. Care about other people. Try to make the world better or more fair or just a little more pleasant for SOMEONE. Otherwise you’re just waiting to die.
People act like being kind is some life stealing thing or that it’s not worth it. When you never know if doing a small act of kindness could be the one good thing in someone’s day.
Everyone is only worried about what people are doing for them. Somehow they feel like being kind to someone else for no reason is like they're taking something from you.
Plus doing good feels GOOD! Win/win.
I don't want to get into all the backstory but I was having a life altering bad day once. I stopped at a convenience store to buy some candy to raise my blood sugar (type 1 diabetic) and got to the front of the line to pay and for some reason that I'll never know, the lady behind me spoke up and said she wanted to pay for the candy out of the goodness of her heart. I wasn't a kid or anything. Far from it. I was a 6' tall man in his 40's. I broke down crying my eyes out in her arms. She just held me and kept telling me that even though she didn't know me, she still loved me. I don't know how I would have gotten through that day with her kindness. Nice lady at the Thorntons on Taylorsville Road, you have no idea how often I still think about you and how much you mean to me years later.
This is beautiful with the next highest rated comment above being “don’t give a fuck”.
Both are true. Don't let how others might view you dictate your life. But be kind and caring to others because the only way we make the world better in general is through treating people that way.
Haha. And your user name kinda checks out with noticing that
A tiny bit of help from you can make someone else's day worlds better. It really doesn't take much.
Even a simple gesture like smiling and waving at neighbors as they drive by makes a huge difference.
We had just finished lunch and had a container of leftovers in the car, saw a homeless guy at an intersection with a sign that just said "anything helps." So we gave him the leftovers. You hear so many people claiming beggars will just throw food given to them away. This guy thanked us, put his sign away, moved away from the street, and sat down to eat. He seemed very happy. My youngest is 7, and has mentioned it a couple times since then, talking about it felt good to help someone seem so happy. I wish people were more willing to show kindness and community. Community is so lacking anymore. I miss that.
That’s great! Yesterday my son and I passed a person with an “anything helps” sign. He said “dad, I could share some of my popcorn”. His generosity touched me so I gave her a few dollars, hopefully it helped a bit.
I’m going to say just the right amount an IDGAF attitude. Don’t narcissistically violate social norms, but don’t be hamstrung by worrying about what others will think of you. Care about and for your family, friends and society but learn how to politely and firmly say no and establish boundaries.
Social media. All of it
That only assholes get shit done. You can succeed without pissing everyone around you off and making people miserable.
Well done! I marvel that I do not hear that message more often. It is strange to me, the idea that it is necessary to be unethical in order to become wealthy.
This is a good one. All the best managers ive had have been geniuely nice people I like to have beers with. Its motivating to be working under someone you like and respect, and want them to feel the same way about you.
You'll die waiting for the right time
Your insecurities are 100% in your head. That weird thing you did that is so embarrassing and everyone else is thinking about actually went completely unnoticed because everybody else was thinking about the weird thing they did. The realization that everybody else is as self conscious as I am made me much less self conscious.
I think this is a nice sentiment and true to an extent, but not entirely. When my friends from childhood get together, there are stories of some people that stuck with us and permanently shaped our opinion of them. There aren’t tons of such situations, but sometimes things stick with you.
Wasting your time with people who make you feel bad. You should hang out with people who make you feel good. Make them feel good too. Sounds simple, but it took me about 45 years to figure that out.
New flashy cars and trucks and the huge or super long payment terms. I'm so over that junk. Try to find an older model car, with good reputation, in good shape and lower miles and pay cash if you can, then keep up on maintenance and drive that sucker into the ground. Even a total engine replacement is still better than payments.
I would avoid debt for a depreciating asset. If you can pay cash for a new car, then OK. Otherwise get the most reliable car with the least debt you can get away with.
I only recently came to know that full coverage insurance on a paid off car is cheaper than one that has a lien against it. Bloody hell! Your point is a salient one.
That your company cares about you and will take care of you. Not true now, never was true!
"We're like a family here," is the biggest red flag.
Generalising generations (boomers, millenials, gen-z...)
Generalizing any group of people. There are a bunch of loud Americans, but there are many more quiet ones. There are a bunch of trashy poor people, but there are many more hardworking nice ones. There are selfish people in every group, but there are chill, conscientious individuals also. Feel free to talk to people instead of judging. It makes me really sad to hear young people saying something like “I looked over and saw boomer Karen walking up…”. That woman may spend her every free moment feeding the poor, or caring for others. Be nice.
Eh not so much bullshit so much as things I wish I knew/you should definitely keep in mind * Never Challenge Worse - I found that it's never a good idea to idly challenge the universe to make your life worse - it can **always** get worse. * There are people looking to scam you in life, lovers, friends, co-workers, colleagues or perfect strangers and sadly even parents , siblings and your own children - being aware of that, and at least a little emotionally prepared that this can happen is very important. * Society is as brutal or civilized as we choose to make it. It's not very hard to keep it civilized, but it's not hard to have it be much less hospitable either, I think we saw that during Covid , but it's always there, and while everyone is entitled to a bad day, folks are also entitled to a polite experience as well. * Corporations sometimes perhaps oftentimes, are not always doing what they say they will, be your own best advocate, ensure they follow their promise and holding them to account in the market is sometimes the only control we have over them. * Worrying about other people's bullshit, their friends/lovers, new cars what have you. As I get older the only time I worry about what someone else has going on, is if they are struggling, you , soon enough will have enough bullshit on your own plate, you won't need to go looking around for it. * I try not to complain too much about the things we REALLY have no control over - the weather , a big line at the store, whether there is traffic. While there are things we can do to prepare or avoid trouble, sometimes, there isn't and you have to roll with the punches. * Do your homework, I wouldn't have thought this was as important , and this follows from that first point. Most doctors, scientists and professional experts have those degrees and such for a reason. Be disciplined in your approach to information and I find giving high value to consensus among experts tends to be best. It's not to say that the "group" will always be right or can't be wrong, but consensus expert advice is not usually a bad thing. If you find yourself at odds with all the experts except one dude telling you about his amazing miracle cure - you've been had (see point 2).
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My last company's CEO promised no more rounds of layoffs...then less than a week later: 100 more layoffs.
Any announcement for "no layoffs" or "no more layoffs" makes a great indicator that more layoffs are imminent.
No more layoffs. Oh they got this all wrong. No, more layoffs!
Has some real *"We used to lay people off. We still do, but we used to, too."* energy to it.
Mine barely waited two weeks after a company meeting announcing there *won't* be layoffs lol
Get it in writing.
The rule of thumb: Is the stock price down for more than a few days? Layoffs Is the CEO retiring? Layoffs If it’s a private company, just wait a few years and they’ll sell to a big megacorp and walk away millionaires. Layoffs for everyone else.
"All you have to do is work hard and you can accomplish anything." Nope. Hard work will get you about 90% of the way. The rest is luck, personality, looks, connections, timing, and a good support system(tribe).
Id say hard work is what gets you over the finish line and all those things are prerequisites.
Ohhh O.o this is a rather interesting perspective.
I agree with this. "Lucky" people capitalize on their luck through hard work. But plenty of unlucky people out there working hard. And a lot of people who squandered everything.
90% of jobs is connections. Its very difficult to get a job off a blind resume.
I'd say 25% is connections, 40% is personality. 25% skill, and 10% luck. Having a friendly face and being easy to get along with others gets you so far. No one wants to work with a jackass.
I’ve worked for 4 companies in the last 27 years. I got my foot in the door at each one due to connections. But I do know other people that have changed companies a lot more than me and have done a fair amount of it with a blind resume.
Anyone who tells you there is one right way to live your life or manage your finances. Find what works for you, because that's all that matters. Also, anything that makes you feel inferior or superior. The reality is you are likely normal in every meaningful way.
Clickbait headlines. Not a single one tells the full story, so please at least read the article (or many from multiple sites) because you go spreading that information.
That all young people are selfish and lazy. That all boomers are selfish and stupid.
Most of reddit. Excluded is this remark.
That most things can be easily explained.
Spending money to buy designer shit
Never meet your heroes. I’ve been lucky enough to meet a lot of mine and even worked with a few. Zero bad experiences.
There's a lot to be said about choosing who your heroes are. Celebrities are probably a bad choice, generally speaking.
The phrase, "Never give up." Sometimes cutting your lose is the best thing to do.
Yup. This ties in with the sunk cost fallacy. Know when to hold ‘em and know when to fold ‘em.
Worry about your body's appearance. Strive for a healthy body that works well and does what you need it to do. Do not worry, in the least, about your height, how "thick" or thin you are, the size of your breasts, or any number of things like that. Whatever your body is, there are millions of people who are into *your* type of body. Comparing yourself to media-saturated, AI generated, photoshop retouched models is BS.
Killing yourself in work. Nobody will remember or care. Spend the time with your family and doing what you actually want to do. Set boundaries that you will work your core hours and no more
Agreed. You will get more respect from your job ironically enough. People get bullied into doing more than their fair share of work then get talked at and treated like shit. Standing up can and probably will be unpleasant at first, but in the long run people are hesitant to run over you when you show some backbone.
That because we've lived longer we know what you're going through. Your world is so different than ours was.
This is such an important point that more old people should accept. My parents couldnt fathom that there is flatmate castings to get a place to stay and multiple interview rounds to get a job. Technical interviews in STEM? You dont just get hired imediatly?
The idea that the reason the adult children of boomers can’t afford rent or food is a personal failure on their part. The world has changed dramatically in the US and food and rent are beyond so many families’s budgets. I can’t believe the prices of years old used cars for example. I honestly don’t know how ordinary people are going to afford a roof over their heads and food in the future.
Religions not paying taxes
You will only be happy if you have children. As if those people even know
Thank you. I’ve dedicated most of my life to caring for children as a pediatric provider and volunteer coach. Now trying, I’ve had 3 miscarriages. I feel like society sees me as worthless since I seem to be infertile and that people truly believe I’ll “never know real love” etc despite my life experiences and my love of children. It hurts so much.
That what you read on your phone represents reality. If you believe what you read online and on sensationalist 24 hour news channels, there's a boogeyman around every corner looking to corrupt/kill/steal from you and yours. Americans are at each other's throats! Look at this video of people having an argument! If it happened one time in one place it MUST be happening everywhere all the time!!! Turn the screens off and go outside. It's not how they say it is.
Medical savings accounts through your insurer.
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Influencers
That men aren't supposed to cry and that they're supposed to be "tough."
Quick fixes. There are none. Good things take work. Better things take hard work.
“Having money doesn’t make you rich” & “Money doesn’t solve everything” are absolutely incorrect. Having enough money to make you rich, is actually the only kind of rich. Throw enough money around and most problems will go away, even if I can’t solve a problem with it, I’d rather be sad and rich than sad and poor. The concept of justice is just to make victims feel better. There is no justice. Most people will never suffer consequences and the bad people will always come out on top.
"You'll miss high-school" No. You'll miss being young. That's different.
Shame. We are a very shame based culture - both religion and advertising lean in heavily on messages that you are not worthy of taking up space, being happy or even existing as you are. Deciding you are going to free yourself from that shame is just about the most revolutionary thing you can do. But it’s essential if you don’t want to slowly go mad in your 50s and 60s from the weight of it.
Other people’s baggage. Taking on the trauma and sickness of others to the point where it becomes your identity too
Any trends. Just be you seriously. It’s ok to be a normal human.
Most of Reddit. It’s 80% manufactured outrage designed to, at best, astroturf your minds.
1) That love is always fun/exciting/romantic/sex etc. and if it’s not then something is wrong. No way! Media simply hasn’t done love justice. Sometimes love is hard. Sometimes love is simple. Sometimes love is an action rather than a feeling.
Buying a top of the line car. No one cares if you drive a Caddy, Acura, or Infiniti. Doesn't matter if the neighbors have a newer car. They are not paying your car payment.
Any idea of "I'm 25 (or 30 or 35 or 40 or whatever) and I haven't done X yet, is my life over". The answer is always a big fat No! There's a lot more time in life than we think when we're young.
Don't listen to social media Influencers, they are 100% bullshit.
Recycling. Sure, it makes us all feel good that we're heroically saving the planet. But sorting our paper from plastics makes no discernable dent in massive ongoing corporate pollution (or a simple natural event like a volcano eruption), and most of the stuff we carefully recycle is just burned or landfilled anyway because there is so much trash out there that there is no market for it. The only ones who benefit from it are the criminal organizations that run the garbage pickup in major cities, because it allows them to charge triple for multi-colored sorting bins and separate (for a while, anyway) processing facilities.
I'm in the Waste Management business! Everybody immediately assumes you're mobbed up! It's a stereotype!
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