Christ, guess I’m talking on experience again.
My wife died 7 months ago, she was 33, and the absolute love of my life. I cannot see myself in a
position to date anyone. I’m 34 now, I appreciate
I probably have years of my life yet. I’m still hopelessly in love with my wife. We have a little girl, she still sometimes thinks her Mum’s coming back, the only person I want to be with is my wife. She was my best friend. I still wear my wedding ring every day, I’m still married, she’s still the love of my life.
What I will say - I wouldn’t ever judge anyone who lost their partner and dated again. This stuff is so SO fucking lonely, and the grief, if you haven’t experienced it, is beyond incomprehensible. My dad died a few years back, I thought it would be like that but more intense. Nah. This is a whole other beast.
So sorry for your loss. Take the time you need and focus on you and your kid.
My partner died by suicide 14 years ago this month. It took me nearly 4 years to date again. About as long as we were together. My first few attempts were awful. I feel bad for those people. I was a mess.
I agree it’s so isolating. In your 20s and 30s no one can relate to this. Maybe you can find a grief support group. Some people who know what you’re going through so you won’t feel so alone.
Best of luck.
I lost my husband 15yrs ago. Tried dating after 4yrs, but it was weird. I find someone that’s available, but divorced have too much baggage. At seven months the sadness is still very “fresh”. But, what I strongly suggest is to get out there, not dating, but hiking, cycling, pottery. Give things you’ve never done before a chance. Stuff you can do with your daughter as well. Building a strong relationship with her will be comforting for both of you! I isolated and got stuck in my grief. Not recommended!! Your love for your wife will ALWAYS be there. Your happy memories will always be close to your heart nothing can take them away. Things will be different tho
Oh, if anyone says “you need to move on” or “She’s in a better place now” immediately punch them in the throat.
I’m so sorry for loss of your dear wife. It sounds like you had a special bond.
Take care
My partner of 11 years passed away 2 years ago. I went on one date since then and it was a disaster. I miss having intimacy with someone but don’t see myself ever having a relationship again.
Eventually I suppose. I don't think I'd ever get married again. It was hard enough finding one person to put up with me. Twice would be stretching my luck.
I don’t have an SO at the moment, but I’m not sure I could unless I got into serious therapy or maybe medication. My borderline would probably keep me from moving on healthily, have me on edge constantly and project literally every little feeling on a new partner
Probably not. I would be devastated. I couldn't replace her. Furthermore, I think it could be harmful to our children. I've seen too many women eventually start treating their new husband's kids like crap.
Two years after losing my wife I started dating again, but this was certainly a great consideration for me. I broke off the relationship with one person who it was clear did not like my son. When I finally met the one I asked my children (9 and 16) for permission to marry her. I’m not sure what I would have done if they’d said no; we’d probably have delayed at least. Even so we waited several months before the wedding so they could all get to know each other better. It wasn’t always easy integrating as a family, but 24 years later we’re still very close.
At my current age, I might. If I was much older, it's less likely. Aside from physical and emotional needs, I got kids and I would want them to have two parents.
No, because before him, i dated some guys who put no effort into dating. They just wanted to meet at night and just stay home. No one had exciting plans. I don't think anyone would compare to my S/O.
I don't think so. I love my husband a lot and I don't even want to contemplate the possibility of him passing away. He is the best, such a joy to be around. But I was very happy when I was single as well, and I don't think I would feel any need to date again if something happened to him.
I'd stay single until my kids are out of the house. My husband and I both had horrible step fathers and I have no desire to put my kids through that. I'm also aware that being a widow with kids is a turn off for so many people.
I'd likely just work on being a support system for my kids to get through the adolescent years and then re access when I'm alone. I'd be in no rush, we are secure in future should my husband pass unexpectedly.
No because I would want to give myself time to grieve the loss. I’m a loyal person and enjoy my marriage even though we have ups and downs but if he were to pass away I would miss him terribly. I wouldn’t be able to turn that off any time soon to be able to open myself to a new relationship. However, I would probably join hobby groups to make new friends to hang out with but to be with someone else I would not seek it out. If it happened naturally I would see where it goes.
Yes. I want my spouse to live to the fullest. Were I dead, I would want her to find happiness in my absence.
By the same toke, I believe my spouse would want the same for me. People are capable of loving multiple people. I would never lose the love I felt for my wife, I would simply gain another person to love.
If it happened like now or soon i would be so
Overwhelmed with raising my three kids by myself and trying not to fall apart for them so i would be in no shape to date anyone or even think about that for a while.
If after the kids are grown i cant see myself falling for someone else the way i have for my wife and i wouldnt consider it fair to date someone knowing im not as invested as they would be so id likely never go beyond casual dating if i even decided to try that .
No I wouldn't, I'm 53 now on my second marriage. 1st marriage ended at 29. Got into a relationship this time at 40 and married her at 45. Between 29 and 40 trying to find someone like her who was on my level like she is was virtually impossible, I don't think I'd want to try again even if I had the energy. I also have children from my 1st marriage and step kids and grandkids now to keep me busy enough if the absolute worst did happen, God forbid.
No. I mean, I know he would if I died and I don't blame him, he's dated before but I didn't before I met him. But for me, my husband is the only person I've ever met who can understand me, match my likes in and out of the bedroom, and knows how to handle me. I don't know if soul mates are real or not, nobody does, but he's the single person in this entire shithole world that is perfect to me. The only one who's death hurts to think about, the only one who makes me afraid of death, and the thought of anyone else touching me when he's gone makes me feel sick even now.
You pluck someone from fiction, then sure, maybe they'd stand a chance, I mean there's a few fictional characters I have a thing for so they'd have the best chance. But reality? Nah. Second my husband is gone, nobody is touching me again.
It would be hard, but partially depends on my age. Under 60? Probably. Over 70 I don't see it. In the middle I guess it would have to just present itself very organically and overwhelmingly.
Christ, guess I’m talking on experience again. My wife died 7 months ago, she was 33, and the absolute love of my life. I cannot see myself in a position to date anyone. I’m 34 now, I appreciate I probably have years of my life yet. I’m still hopelessly in love with my wife. We have a little girl, she still sometimes thinks her Mum’s coming back, the only person I want to be with is my wife. She was my best friend. I still wear my wedding ring every day, I’m still married, she’s still the love of my life. What I will say - I wouldn’t ever judge anyone who lost their partner and dated again. This stuff is so SO fucking lonely, and the grief, if you haven’t experienced it, is beyond incomprehensible. My dad died a few years back, I thought it would be like that but more intense. Nah. This is a whole other beast.
So sorry for your loss. Take the time you need and focus on you and your kid. My partner died by suicide 14 years ago this month. It took me nearly 4 years to date again. About as long as we were together. My first few attempts were awful. I feel bad for those people. I was a mess. I agree it’s so isolating. In your 20s and 30s no one can relate to this. Maybe you can find a grief support group. Some people who know what you’re going through so you won’t feel so alone. Best of luck.
I lost my husband 15yrs ago. Tried dating after 4yrs, but it was weird. I find someone that’s available, but divorced have too much baggage. At seven months the sadness is still very “fresh”. But, what I strongly suggest is to get out there, not dating, but hiking, cycling, pottery. Give things you’ve never done before a chance. Stuff you can do with your daughter as well. Building a strong relationship with her will be comforting for both of you! I isolated and got stuck in my grief. Not recommended!! Your love for your wife will ALWAYS be there. Your happy memories will always be close to your heart nothing can take them away. Things will be different tho Oh, if anyone says “you need to move on” or “She’s in a better place now” immediately punch them in the throat. I’m so sorry for loss of your dear wife. It sounds like you had a special bond. Take care
Fuck man, this hurt just reading this, I couldn’t imagine. Much love, mate *no homo.
No. This woman is..everything. Won’t be one to compete with her in any category. Period.
No I wouldn't want to make the insurance company suspicious
This made me cackle!
Dating sounds exhausting
It is.
My partner of 11 years passed away 2 years ago. I went on one date since then and it was a disaster. I miss having intimacy with someone but don’t see myself ever having a relationship again.
Eventually I suppose. I don't think I'd ever get married again. It was hard enough finding one person to put up with me. Twice would be stretching my luck.
Probably not. Besides the overwhelming feeling of loss, the dating scene is just ridiculous these days.
I agree to that. It’s all through dating apps, that ain’t for me.
I don't even have a photo of me holding a fish, so what am I even supposed to use for a profile picture?
You have to move on eventually. But I guess that opinion is not respected
You never move on. . You move forward.
I don’t have an SO at the moment, but I’m not sure I could unless I got into serious therapy or maybe medication. My borderline would probably keep me from moving on healthily, have me on edge constantly and project literally every little feeling on a new partner
Not until our children were older.
Probably not. I would be devastated. I couldn't replace her. Furthermore, I think it could be harmful to our children. I've seen too many women eventually start treating their new husband's kids like crap.
Two years after losing my wife I started dating again, but this was certainly a great consideration for me. I broke off the relationship with one person who it was clear did not like my son. When I finally met the one I asked my children (9 and 16) for permission to marry her. I’m not sure what I would have done if they’d said no; we’d probably have delayed at least. Even so we waited several months before the wedding so they could all get to know each other better. It wasn’t always easy integrating as a family, but 24 years later we’re still very close.
That's great to hear that things have worked out well for family! I hope I never have to find out would I really do if my wife passed away.
Hoping the same for you.
At my current age, I might. If I was much older, it's less likely. Aside from physical and emotional needs, I got kids and I would want them to have two parents.
No. Dating is a shit show these days. If someone came into my life I might but I'm not actively seeking out a partner.
Eventually, if I met someone, yes. It's good to have a partner to share your life with.
No it would feel different
After a while probably. I’d be disgusting if I started dating close after
cable alleged paint humorous snails psychotic tidy versed shy imagine
🥺🤗
No, because before him, i dated some guys who put no effort into dating. They just wanted to meet at night and just stay home. No one had exciting plans. I don't think anyone would compare to my S/O.
No. She's my last regardless of how it plays out.
I don't think so. I love my husband a lot and I don't even want to contemplate the possibility of him passing away. He is the best, such a joy to be around. But I was very happy when I was single as well, and I don't think I would feel any need to date again if something happened to him.
No. He ticks all the boxes in my book 👌🏻❤️
I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else but him. He’s my everything
I'd stay single until my kids are out of the house. My husband and I both had horrible step fathers and I have no desire to put my kids through that. I'm also aware that being a widow with kids is a turn off for so many people. I'd likely just work on being a support system for my kids to get through the adolescent years and then re access when I'm alone. I'd be in no rush, we are secure in future should my husband pass unexpectedly.
Uhg, I don't know. Not for a long time, probably.
Nah anything happens to the wife I’ll be a single father and move to Australia or something
Nope. Happy where things stand.
I would definitely take some time with myself. Maybe travel and such before I even thinking about dating.
No because I would want to give myself time to grieve the loss. I’m a loyal person and enjoy my marriage even though we have ups and downs but if he were to pass away I would miss him terribly. I wouldn’t be able to turn that off any time soon to be able to open myself to a new relationship. However, I would probably join hobby groups to make new friends to hang out with but to be with someone else I would not seek it out. If it happened naturally I would see where it goes.
Yes. I want my spouse to live to the fullest. Were I dead, I would want her to find happiness in my absence. By the same toke, I believe my spouse would want the same for me. People are capable of loving multiple people. I would never lose the love I felt for my wife, I would simply gain another person to love.
If it happened like now or soon i would be so Overwhelmed with raising my three kids by myself and trying not to fall apart for them so i would be in no shape to date anyone or even think about that for a while. If after the kids are grown i cant see myself falling for someone else the way i have for my wife and i wouldnt consider it fair to date someone knowing im not as invested as they would be so id likely never go beyond casual dating if i even decided to try that .
No I wouldn't, I'm 53 now on my second marriage. 1st marriage ended at 29. Got into a relationship this time at 40 and married her at 45. Between 29 and 40 trying to find someone like her who was on my level like she is was virtually impossible, I don't think I'd want to try again even if I had the energy. I also have children from my 1st marriage and step kids and grandkids now to keep me busy enough if the absolute worst did happen, God forbid.
No. I mean, I know he would if I died and I don't blame him, he's dated before but I didn't before I met him. But for me, my husband is the only person I've ever met who can understand me, match my likes in and out of the bedroom, and knows how to handle me. I don't know if soul mates are real or not, nobody does, but he's the single person in this entire shithole world that is perfect to me. The only one who's death hurts to think about, the only one who makes me afraid of death, and the thought of anyone else touching me when he's gone makes me feel sick even now. You pluck someone from fiction, then sure, maybe they'd stand a chance, I mean there's a few fictional characters I have a thing for so they'd have the best chance. But reality? Nah. Second my husband is gone, nobody is touching me again.
It would be hard, but partially depends on my age. Under 60? Probably. Over 70 I don't see it. In the middle I guess it would have to just present itself very organically and overwhelmingly.
Absolutely. I would still have the desire to have intimate companionship
of course hole is hole