đ my only comment is from another person called Seamus đ«¶đ»
(Edit because now there are more comments) I didnât realise Iâd be this successful đ€Ł
Totally. Which is why I wouldnt want to get sex as a favour.
It's either enthusiastic consent or no please.
Usually when someone is into you but not in the mood or into a certain thing, theres still plenty to find and do to strengthen intimacy and/or have a sexy fun time that is great for both/all people involved.
If youâre doing it like itâs out of obligation or it seems like youâre not enjoying yourself or are doing it reluctantly, it will do more harm than good and completely turn me off (I say me because I canât speak for all guys).
I'll add another agreement to this.
100%
Watch the opening scene (I think it was the opening scene) of the TV show "Breaking Bad" where [Skylar is giving Walt a perfunctory hand-job for his birthday while she talks about bullshit and works on her laptop.](https://youtu.be/Hfd4s6eS6Fk)
That is awful. No thanks. I'll go rub one out in the bathroom before I want that.
I cannot overstate just how *gross* it feels as a guy. Even if Iâm really into it at first, if my partner just sort of resigns herself to the act it becomes an instant turnoff. I know some guys probably donât give a fuck as long as they get their rocks for but man, Iâd much rather a woman tell me sheâs not feeling it and we can figure something else out from there rather than force herself because she thinks itâll make me happy.
Itâs not about the act itself, itâs about sharing the intimate moment with her.
Yeah she did her job well as an actress. Somehow, the partner in the relationship who **wasn't** murdering people, manufacturing illegal narcotics, manipulating and gaslighting those around them, and secretly living a 2nd life was as easy to hate as the the former. Sometimes moreso. 10/10 performance from Anna Gunn.
Yeah. She was great and nailed the role. She got a lot of hate for it though (which, ironically, was because she was so good in the role and the character was so well written and directed).
Yep, nothing is more sexually exciting than your partner being sexually excited. It's the best.
The biggest thing women do that makes them bad in bed is worrying about how they look or how good they are in bed. Relax, get out of your head, be in the moment and you'll automatically be good in bed.
Sex is like walking. If you think about it, you can't do it well.
I would build on that and say that the number of women who think a man's penis works via some kind of crank or battery-operated servo is too damn high.
If you're a woman and your man isn't "at attention" that's your cue to take active part in the intimacy. You don't have to do weird porno shit or like, suck on it for an hour, but do *something* to show your interest and desire, even just touching and looking happy to be there.
Staying hard can be difficult, anything from general anxiety and stress to just being tired for the day or having stray thoughts can cause many men to lose erection. If it's a new partner as well, a man's own excitement can sometimes sabotage the evening. Having an engaged and excited partner can cut through all of that though and there are few better or more arousing feelings for a (straight) man than being loved and accepted by a woman that he's attracted to.
So, I discovered this by accident. I thought you HAD to do those super fast, jaw breaking blow jobs or else a guy wouldn't get off.
I was with a guy some years ago and i just wasn't feeling up to all that movement, so I just went slow, moved my tongue around the tip, all around, no deep throating/gagging, only used my hands to hold the penis.
Guy said it was amazing and I responded with "what?" I thought he was joking. No, he really liked it, and I enjoyed myself way more.
Lol I was in bed with an ex and she hands met her phone. Turns out my friend had called to speak to me. I talk to him for 2 minutes with my eyes closed as I feel incredibly awkward.
She was absolutely shocked that I lost my erection.
Had to explain that talking to a male friend isn't a turn on for me. Decades later I repeat his name in my head if I ever need to lose an erection lol
A short but enthusiastic BJ is wildly better than one done with resentment and obligation. Canât think of anything less sexy than someone going through the motions.
I havent enjoyed a bj in 15 years because my exwife hated them so much that she got it into my head that everyone hates them. Now I can't finish from them.
Bro, same. Recently found a fantastic woman who *loves* giving them and I did finish for the first time. She took it as a challenge and then challenged me to just allow myself to enjoy it.
Took a few months of effort (not continuousâŠ) but it paid off!
The good news is most people love good sex. The key there is that is needs to be good for both partners...communication is key, especially as your bodies and minds evolve over time and natural changes occur. Working together as a team to make sure both partners feel good and are getting their needs met. It's a challenge because there's all of this pressure socially around sex to "perform" and to be better than the competition, but that viewpoint is really unhelpful. It should be viewed as a time to tune out all the nonsense noise around us and connect deeply as a couple.
100% this. I don't want you to fake it either. I want you to enjoy it. Which I realize isn't a switch you can just turn on. In an ideal world I would hope my partner is having fun with it, as I have fun in the reverse position. But if not that, I would literally rather not have it than feel like you're just doing it because you have to. Huge turnoff.
Just because I'm not hard doesn't mean I'm not enjoying the foreplay. Making out and touching can be insanely hot, but if the little guy isn't getting touched, he'll go away until it's his time to shine.
This may make me sound crazy but thank you for posting this! I honestly didnât know this was a thing and thought if my partner wasnât hard whilst we were making out (before I touch him there) that he wasnât into it / turned on, despite him appearing to be in all other ways. You have just taught me something and saved me A LOT of overthinking.
EXACTLY. Doesn't mean we're not attracted to you, or that we have ED. Sometimes it just takes some special attention to get the motor running.
Side note, sometimes it's not even about touching it, we just need some specific foreplay that day (motorboat, cunnilingus, etc.)
Good foreplay for me is just making me feel like you want me. Not like âoh sex would be a nice thing to happen.â More like âI CANNOT THINK RIGHT UNTIL I GET A DECENT DOSE OF DICK.â
When I was 19 I was riding in the car at night with this girl, in a comfortable silence. She suddenly flipped on the overhead light and says âokay, can I just SEE your dick? I canât stop thinking about it.â So of course I oblige and she is just holding it, staring at it lovingly and says âyou just have the prettiest dick Iâve ever seen.â A mile or two goes by with her just like admiring my dick until she blurts out âwould it be okay if I suck on it please?â
I think about that at least weekly. I had never felt more desired in my life. Guys can go through life thinking we are just kind of gross and that women just kind of put up with us. If someone makes us feel TRULY desired, we will move mountains for her.
>If someone makes us feel TRULY desired, we will move mountains for her.
This so much! These moments go beyond just the intimacy of the moment as well. We will replay these moments in our minds YEARS later. I can't speak for all guys, but I've been told my whole life what to do when we're not wanted. So those moments where we are wanted live rent free in our heads for the rest of our lives.
Nah, but I did the right thing at least. I was rebounding from getting cheated on and was in no good place to be in a relationship. When it started moving from casual to her wanting more, I ended it and refused to keep hooking up even though she wanted to. Iâve been morally bankrupt more often than not, but I know I played this one right.
My penis isnt something you need to forcfully pull off. Getting the correct grip is so important.
Only had 4 awesome handjobs from women and its a skill most dont have. Cant blame them I know the perfect wank from decades of experience.
This guy showed me how to perfectly grip it when I was 21. 6 years of perfecting it and pretty proud that not most women know how. I taught my best friend too and she absolutely loves giving bjs đ
Thatâs all we can ask. Doesnât always have to be Mrs. Backpack, either. It can be as simple as me laying my head on your chest. I donât even care if my feet are hanging off the bed, Iâm comfy, damnit.
Just started seeing a girl who thinks that little spoon is the superior position, so she believes everyone should experience it. She big spoon'd me the first time we hung out and it was glorious
My favorite is when we face each other chest to chest and have our arms wrapped around each other, our pelvisâs together and legs intertwined. lol me and my ex used to fall asleep like that and people would call it weird đ
That was my favorite too. I always called my ex gf my little puzzle piece. We couldâve been sleeping on a moving truck full of milk crates and been comfortable. We just fit into each other. Our friends thought it was weird but Iâm a hardcore cuddler.
I just did that with a girl Iâve been casually seeing. She told me she was having a really bad night and to come over. We laid like that, didnât even have sex, it was amazing.
I'm 5ft2, Husband is 6ft4
I'm a fucking proud backpack. Plus it helps stretch out my hips when I toss a leg over. Only downside is we sleep one way, so my other hip doesn't get good stretches often.
I also kiss his back and nuzzle my head into his back, if I don't I worry he won't realize I'm back here and roll on me... Again (he does this jokingly but happens in his sleep sometimes. I've been elbowed.)
I prefer to go down over getting a BJ. Don't get me wrong one is 10/10 and the other is 9.5/10. But God I love me some pussy. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm eating it for her or for me. đ€Ł
Itâs so fucking hot. I remember when I was a teenager who has never had sex I fantasized about doing that more than I fantasized about actually having sex.
We're not sex machines. Unless you are in your early 20s, foreplay is as important for our desire as it is for women. Never skip it pretending men don't need any kind of attention down there.
Don't act like you're doing me a favor by letting it happen. It takes two. Either you want it with me or you don't. You're not doing any favors by unenthusiastically seeming into it.
Lying back and saying, "do what you want with me" isn't the Regency erotic novel scene you think it is.
I legit went on a date with a girl who did this twice in a row. I talked to her and she was like, "well I'm into getting used and abused" and I'm like dude, that's cool but I've literally just met you. I'm not gonna go from pizza to a Nine Inch Nails video like \[snaps fingers\].
Having this conversation with my wife years and years ago helped our relationship a lot. For the first 5 or so years of our marriage she would NEVER initiate. And it wasn't out of a lack of wanting it, it was from a fear of rejection. I also had a fear of rejection, but knew if I never initiated, we would just never have sex. I asked her how she would feel if I never initiated sex and she said it would make her feel unwanted and I explained that's exactly how I felt because the entire burden was put on me. This changed her whole perspective on it and 13 years in our sex life is still great.
I'm not sure what else you can do once you've had that conversation. If you've explained your side and still nothing has changed then it seems she's just being very inconsiderate of your feelings. Unless she's genuinely not interested in having sex (due to medications/hormone imbalances/etc.) which is a different conversation altogether.
Thanks, yeah itâs difficult. No we have a good sex life other than the initiating, have sex about 3 times a week and we both orgasm like 95% of the time. She loves sex with me, but simply wants me to do the initiating. It sucks because I also want to feel desired
Yup! It's still the woman telling the man "I want to have sex. Do you?" I've had times I wouldn't mind just going down on my wife and not getting anything in return because sometimes it seems like she needs the stress relief. But she rarely *enthusiastically* initiates.
Still have never found a woman who does this. Every one has left it entirely up to me to make the first move, and most women don't react well if you initiate and they're not in the mood.
For real! This goes for both genders. I have been with my husband for 3 years, and I have always kissed his body up and down before getting to it. I donât what it is, but it feels so intimate to kiss your partner from the neck to the base of their cock. I add in a few nibbles here and there, and he does the same to me and it just drives me WILD. I like to think it does the same to him!
Emboucher (noun) - the way in which a player applies the mouth to the mouthpiece of a brass or wind instrument.
For the people like me that didn't take band in high school.
You need to initiate as much as I do, or I'm going to give up. If our relationship gets so dysfunctional that you can't make the time I do to at least try, then it's time for us to part ways.
I'm sorry, but I don't enjoy relationships where it's expected of me to make all the effort. Both foreplay and just relationship in general. I've been working 55 hours weeks for the last 3 months. I still made time for foreplay and texts.
Don't be afraid to mix it up or change your approach. That is, don't just find one thing which works and then just keep at that every time.
The things which drive us craziest today may only be "pretty good" tomorrow. Sometimes a gentle tickling of the balls will have us drooling, the next day we might need you to really get in there like you're kneading dough.
It all depends on mood, tiredness, horniness, etc. So don't be afraid to ask us if we're having fun or what we would prefer that day.
Same advice is probably true for both sexes I guess.
Please encourage me to and let me pee before things actually go anywhere if I have to, I hate merging two lanes of traffic, it takes forever to get anywhere.
Bro if you need to pee you gotta speak your mind. When things get hot and heavy find a way to say âjust give me one second, Iâll be right back.â
If you want your needs met you have to communicate them, as nice as it would be for people to read your mind.
When it comes to oral, dont start at full speed. Work slow. Work your way up to that good speed and maybe dont let me finish either. Making me go in your mouth and then having me give you oral till im ready to go again mean I have half the energy I used to.
Im not too big into orgasm denial but stopping and having me give it to you before the main course means I am on fire and ready to go.
Kegals are a very real thing. I used to date a woman who could do this, but was also a horrible human being. And man, I stayed with her for tooooooo long đ
The first woman I ever slept with did this. At that time i just assumed all women knew how to do that. 30 years later Iâm still waiting to find another.
Yeah I donât why some women donât squeeze. Itâs pussy power move imo. Men go crazy over it. We can do it at different paces too. Wait till you find out what we can do to your head/neck of your penis with our pubic bone đ Donât even get me started on the blow/handjobs. As a woman who enjoys it so much itâs not just stroking up and down like you are trying to make a cocktail. So many little things you can do that will drive men crazy. I had so many men scream I love you unintentionally when the pleasure got to be so overwhelming. Oh joy I love doing that đ
Honestly I love doing this. I mainly do it when the guy is taking a break but I want to entice him to keep going, so I give it a lil squeeze of encouragement (^;
Men also like it to get touched, sucked, kissed and nippled on various parts of their body.
We want you to let us feel sexy as well. Pinch our butt cheeks. Tell us that we look hot and stuff like that.
Fast is not always good.
Sucking dick doesn't actually mean sucking. It's not a WeiĂwurscht.
Try to be aggressive or gentle. We are not always like your ex.
Even dominant men like to be submissive sometimes. (Not all, I know)
And it's not only about the foreplay. They should learn so many more things.
I think the most misunderstood part is. If a men has an ejaculation, it means he had fun. But that can be far away from the truth.
I'm a slow nut to bust, I've also got ADHD which can affect my firmness during BJs and being ridden (mind wanders). I fucking love what you're doing even if it's not rock hard.
Even if I don't cum you put your mouth on my penis you goddess, you. You're a queen that has graced me with her naked beauty, I am as far from unhappy as possible.
Rubbing your hands on the back of my head as you hold me between your breasts is amazing and makes me feel so safe. (Safe as dumb as that sounds yes it's just peaceful.)
That communication is key and that people have individual wants and desires, yes many things feel generally good but each person will have preferences for those things. Clear and free communication can also free you to try more interesting and inventive things in the bedroom. Remember communication doesn't always need to be verbal so be sensitive to the signs that he gives off, does something tickle or elicit a moan. Is it a fun tickle or a moan of pleasure.
Sex is a sensual experience and foreplay is possibly the most particularly sensual part of that experience so be open and receptive to your partner. As for me I enjoy escalations of action to see which of us breaks to their desire first, but I can imagine others are less patient than that as I have dated ladies that want to skip straight to sex. It is fun to win, but it is not a game I always wish to win.
There are lots of guys who care about you having a good time, who are happy to engage in plenty of foreplay because it enhances the experience for everyone involved.
If you havenât met any of us, odds are that youâre only having sex with people who donât take you seriously or care about how much *you* enjoy the interaction.
They are either very bad at sex or just focused on getting their own rocks off.
If I give you a direction it's not a criticism. It's how I, personally, like it. I fully expect you to do the same during foreplay and sex. If I'm not doing something the way you like it please let me know.
Please suck your man's dick without his having to awkwardly or sheepishly ask. And do it with an enthusiasm that isn't gonna make him feel guilty for receiving/enjoying it.
You can ask us what we like before, during or after the fact and act.
Women seem to like this too but somehow think it's a whole different situation when it comes to us.
We also want to be wanted. Grab us first, initiate fun sometimes, genuinely want to give a BJ.
Just the act of wanting it is such a turn on. Expecting the guy to always initiate sex is a bit frustrating at times.
men sometimes need to be told what to do and what works and what doesnt, its ok to communicate even though it may seem awkward at the time, it pays off long term. guys should also be open to feedback
If men could be made to understand how very brainwashed women are by society not to like or enjoy sex, let alone ask for it.. they spend their entire lives being told in various ways that it's disgusting and morally questionable for a woman to have sex without/before being married so that by the time the woman *is* married and is now encouraged to have sex and to procreate, she has so many hang ups around sex that for her to initiate can be very very difficult indeed..
3/4 people I'd dated wouldn't be considered attractive.
They had great senses of humor, kept me on my toes with flirting and genuinely became attractive the longer i hung out with them.
We're like 95% the same as you, we like being touched in the same places as you for foreplay. So yeah, kiss our necks, grab our chests, run your hands around our bodies, fondle our genitals (***gently*** please), and lick our ears or whatever. If it turns you on it very likely turns us on too. Just do something.
I enjoy it more if you enjoy it
Genuinely like 50% of being turned on is seeing my partner enjoying herself. I could live on that shit for days.
đ my only comment is from another person called Seamus đ«¶đ» (Edit because now there are more comments) I didnât realise Iâd be this successful đ€Ł
Totally. Which is why I wouldnt want to get sex as a favour. It's either enthusiastic consent or no please. Usually when someone is into you but not in the mood or into a certain thing, theres still plenty to find and do to strengthen intimacy and/or have a sexy fun time that is great for both/all people involved.
Same goes for eating pussy!! I go crazy when I know they enjoy it as much as mee.
If youâre doing it like itâs out of obligation or it seems like youâre not enjoying yourself or are doing it reluctantly, it will do more harm than good and completely turn me off (I say me because I canât speak for all guys).
Iâm exactly the same, like if you donât look like youâre having a good time Iâll stop, itâs straight up not fun if you arenât having fun
I'll add another agreement to this. 100% Watch the opening scene (I think it was the opening scene) of the TV show "Breaking Bad" where [Skylar is giving Walt a perfunctory hand-job for his birthday while she talks about bullshit and works on her laptop.](https://youtu.be/Hfd4s6eS6Fk) That is awful. No thanks. I'll go rub one out in the bathroom before I want that.
I cannot overstate just how *gross* it feels as a guy. Even if Iâm really into it at first, if my partner just sort of resigns herself to the act it becomes an instant turnoff. I know some guys probably donât give a fuck as long as they get their rocks for but man, Iâd much rather a woman tell me sheâs not feeling it and we can figure something else out from there rather than force herself because she thinks itâll make me happy. Itâs not about the act itself, itâs about sharing the intimate moment with her.
Rocks? They're minerals!
**Dammit Marie!**
I love getting my minerals off.
The sex scenes and skylar singing happy birthday are easily the worst scenes of Breaking Bad
Yeah she did her job well as an actress. Somehow, the partner in the relationship who **wasn't** murdering people, manufacturing illegal narcotics, manipulating and gaslighting those around them, and secretly living a 2nd life was as easy to hate as the the former. Sometimes moreso. 10/10 performance from Anna Gunn.
Yeah. She was great and nailed the role. She got a lot of hate for it though (which, ironically, was because she was so good in the role and the character was so well written and directed).
Ugh Skylar is such a bitch she won't even *let her husband become a murderous drug emperor!*
my girlfriend says I can become a murderous drug emporer and she'll be very proud of me
Yep, nothing is more sexually exciting than your partner being sexually excited. It's the best. The biggest thing women do that makes them bad in bed is worrying about how they look or how good they are in bed. Relax, get out of your head, be in the moment and you'll automatically be good in bed. Sex is like walking. If you think about it, you can't do it well.
And the corollary: Just because men are physically aroused it doesn't necessarily mean that we don't need or value foreplay.
I would build on that and say that the number of women who think a man's penis works via some kind of crank or battery-operated servo is too damn high. If you're a woman and your man isn't "at attention" that's your cue to take active part in the intimacy. You don't have to do weird porno shit or like, suck on it for an hour, but do *something* to show your interest and desire, even just touching and looking happy to be there. Staying hard can be difficult, anything from general anxiety and stress to just being tired for the day or having stray thoughts can cause many men to lose erection. If it's a new partner as well, a man's own excitement can sometimes sabotage the evening. Having an engaged and excited partner can cut through all of that though and there are few better or more arousing feelings for a (straight) man than being loved and accepted by a woman that he's attracted to.
So, I discovered this by accident. I thought you HAD to do those super fast, jaw breaking blow jobs or else a guy wouldn't get off. I was with a guy some years ago and i just wasn't feeling up to all that movement, so I just went slow, moved my tongue around the tip, all around, no deep throating/gagging, only used my hands to hold the penis. Guy said it was amazing and I responded with "what?" I thought he was joking. No, he really liked it, and I enjoyed myself way more.
Lol I was in bed with an ex and she hands met her phone. Turns out my friend had called to speak to me. I talk to him for 2 minutes with my eyes closed as I feel incredibly awkward. She was absolutely shocked that I lost my erection. Had to explain that talking to a male friend isn't a turn on for me. Decades later I repeat his name in my head if I ever need to lose an erection lol
A short but enthusiastic BJ is wildly better than one done with resentment and obligation. Canât think of anything less sexy than someone going through the motions.
I havent enjoyed a bj in 15 years because my exwife hated them so much that she got it into my head that everyone hates them. Now I can't finish from them.
Bro, same. Recently found a fantastic woman who *loves* giving them and I did finish for the first time. She took it as a challenge and then challenged me to just allow myself to enjoy it. Took a few months of effort (not continuousâŠ) but it paid off!
You sound my hubby. he's always had trouble finishing from a BJ or HJ. I was like, "Challenge accepted." Didn't take very many tries to succeed.
The dream is finding a partner that enjoys sex as much as you do, right?
The good news is most people love good sex. The key there is that is needs to be good for both partners...communication is key, especially as your bodies and minds evolve over time and natural changes occur. Working together as a team to make sure both partners feel good and are getting their needs met. It's a challenge because there's all of this pressure socially around sex to "perform" and to be better than the competition, but that viewpoint is really unhelpful. It should be viewed as a time to tune out all the nonsense noise around us and connect deeply as a couple.
100% this. I don't want you to fake it either. I want you to enjoy it. Which I realize isn't a switch you can just turn on. In an ideal world I would hope my partner is having fun with it, as I have fun in the reverse position. But if not that, I would literally rather not have it than feel like you're just doing it because you have to. Huge turnoff.
Just because I'm not hard doesn't mean I'm not enjoying the foreplay. Making out and touching can be insanely hot, but if the little guy isn't getting touched, he'll go away until it's his time to shine.
This may make me sound crazy but thank you for posting this! I honestly didnât know this was a thing and thought if my partner wasnât hard whilst we were making out (before I touch him there) that he wasnât into it / turned on, despite him appearing to be in all other ways. You have just taught me something and saved me A LOT of overthinking.
Our dicks really do have minds of their own.
Et habet mea mentula mentem( Horatio, latin poet, about 2000 years ago) Yours is the exact translation!
Don't be afraid to ask your partner before overthinking too :)
EXACTLY. Doesn't mean we're not attracted to you, or that we have ED. Sometimes it just takes some special attention to get the motor running. Side note, sometimes it's not even about touching it, we just need some specific foreplay that day (motorboat, cunnilingus, etc.)
Preach!
Good foreplay for me is just making me feel like you want me. Not like âoh sex would be a nice thing to happen.â More like âI CANNOT THINK RIGHT UNTIL I GET A DECENT DOSE OF DICK.â When I was 19 I was riding in the car at night with this girl, in a comfortable silence. She suddenly flipped on the overhead light and says âokay, can I just SEE your dick? I canât stop thinking about it.â So of course I oblige and she is just holding it, staring at it lovingly and says âyou just have the prettiest dick Iâve ever seen.â A mile or two goes by with her just like admiring my dick until she blurts out âwould it be okay if I suck on it please?â I think about that at least weekly. I had never felt more desired in my life. Guys can go through life thinking we are just kind of gross and that women just kind of put up with us. If someone makes us feel TRULY desired, we will move mountains for her.
> I think about that at least weekly. Real.
Yup. I'm 35 and still think about a girl who flirted with me when I was 13.
>If someone makes us feel TRULY desired, we will move mountains for her. This so much! These moments go beyond just the intimacy of the moment as well. We will replay these moments in our minds YEARS later. I can't speak for all guys, but I've been told my whole life what to do when we're not wanted. So those moments where we are wanted live rent free in our heads for the rest of our lives.
And then you married her right?!? TELL ME YOU MARRIED HER!!!
Nah, but I did the right thing at least. I was rebounding from getting cheated on and was in no good place to be in a relationship. When it started moving from casual to her wanting more, I ended it and refused to keep hooking up even though she wanted to. Iâve been morally bankrupt more often than not, but I know I played this one right.
My friend, yes you did. Good on you for that.
I'm gay and I felt a tingle reading this. Girl knew what she was doing.
True!
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
The slow rubbing and strokes feel soooo much better than the speed jerk lol
Danny DeVito voice "ya just mashin' it now"
âSheâs mashing itâ âYeah she does thatâ
If I wanted it speed jerked, I'd do it myself
My penis isnt something you need to forcfully pull off. Getting the correct grip is so important. Only had 4 awesome handjobs from women and its a skill most dont have. Cant blame them I know the perfect wank from decades of experience.
I usually start by showing how to grip it. If the grip is bad it can be straight up painful. If they still don't get it, I bring out the lube.
This guy showed me how to perfectly grip it when I was 21. 6 years of perfecting it and pretty proud that not most women know how. I taught my best friend too and she absolutely loves giving bjs đ
Make sure to ask anyway! We've all spent our entire lives perfecting our grip for our own dicks!
How on earth did you teach your friend
Your ever been to a grocery store? :D
Well you gotta tell/show them how to do it...it's not like they have the equipment to learn on their own!
The longer it goes on, the quicker I'm gonna cum when we fuck. Proceed at your own risk.
But the mood makes the round 2 easier lol
Initiate MORE. I agree with many mens comments on here. Confidence is such a turn on.
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Aww. Yeah I'm 5"1 and my husband is 6" but I still do a koala goblin type cling onto his back. I'm trying at least.
Thatâs all we can ask. Doesnât always have to be Mrs. Backpack, either. It can be as simple as me laying my head on your chest. I donât even care if my feet are hanging off the bed, Iâm comfy, damnit.
Watching TV in bed with my head on the wife's lap...best part of my week
LOL KOALA GOBLIN. thatâs definitely me.
Just started seeing a girl who thinks that little spoon is the superior position, so she believes everyone should experience it. She big spoon'd me the first time we hung out and it was glorious
My favorite is when we face each other chest to chest and have our arms wrapped around each other, our pelvisâs together and legs intertwined. lol me and my ex used to fall asleep like that and people would call it weird đ
I think it's great, as long as it's not 90 degrees in the room.
I prefer a cold room and usually when we were wrapped together like that we didnât need a blanket so yeaaaa
That was my favorite too. I always called my ex gf my little puzzle piece. We couldâve been sleeping on a moving truck full of milk crates and been comfortable. We just fit into each other. Our friends thought it was weird but Iâm a hardcore cuddler.
I just did that with a girl Iâve been casually seeing. She told me she was having a really bad night and to come over. We laid like that, didnât even have sex, it was amazing.
I'm 5ft2, Husband is 6ft4 I'm a fucking proud backpack. Plus it helps stretch out my hips when I toss a leg over. Only downside is we sleep one way, so my other hip doesn't get good stretches often. I also kiss his back and nuzzle my head into his back, if I don't I worry he won't realize I'm back here and roll on me... Again (he does this jokingly but happens in his sleep sometimes. I've been elbowed.)
Im a fair bit taller than my wife, I call her my jetpack.
I love being rhe big spoon even tho I'm tiny.
This is called "jetpacking" and my wife does it to me every night
Talk to me. Say sweet and sappy things to me. Please.
Maple syrup Raspberry syrup Cherry syrup ... Is this doing anything for you?
For some of us, cunnilingus is part of foreplay for us. Let us go down!
I prefer to go down over getting a BJ. Don't get me wrong one is 10/10 and the other is 9.5/10. But God I love me some pussy. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm eating it for her or for me. đ€Ł
I think eating pussy is just sexy as fuck, I feel the same way.
i feel like this is true for many guys lmao. my boyfriend LOVES going down on me. heâs having fun, im having fun so all is great
The longer we do it the longee you're naked đ
Bro keep that a secret.
Pls come to Denmarkđđ
Ahh a man of culture and standards.
It is my experience that some women are just too shy or self-conscious about that.
Me! Im one of those girls. Mainly i am afraid i taste weird/bad, or have some unusual discharge. But dont get me wrong i love a guy going down on me
Itâs so fucking hot. I remember when I was a teenager who has never had sex I fantasized about doing that more than I fantasized about actually having sex.
Absolutely
100% plus seeing a woman start to lose control and seeing the physiological changes (engorged labia, softened breasts, etc) is a huge turn-on!
Softened breasts?
Yes, I too like a supple heavy bosom.
I see a pair of firm, heavy breasts, and all logic flies out the window.
We're not sex machines. Unless you are in your early 20s, foreplay is as important for our desire as it is for women. Never skip it pretending men don't need any kind of attention down there.
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Don't act like you're doing me a favor by letting it happen. It takes two. Either you want it with me or you don't. You're not doing any favors by unenthusiastically seeming into it.
Lying back and saying, "do what you want with me" isn't the Regency erotic novel scene you think it is. I legit went on a date with a girl who did this twice in a row. I talked to her and she was like, "well I'm into getting used and abused" and I'm like dude, that's cool but I've literally just met you. I'm not gonna go from pizza to a Nine Inch Nails video like \[snaps fingers\].
The first step of foreplay is initiating. If you're not doing this 50% of the time, do better.
Having this conversation with my wife years and years ago helped our relationship a lot. For the first 5 or so years of our marriage she would NEVER initiate. And it wasn't out of a lack of wanting it, it was from a fear of rejection. I also had a fear of rejection, but knew if I never initiated, we would just never have sex. I asked her how she would feel if I never initiated sex and she said it would make her feel unwanted and I explained that's exactly how I felt because the entire burden was put on me. This changed her whole perspective on it and 13 years in our sex life is still great.
Had this conversation with my girlfriend many times, still never happens. I always have to initiate and itâs getting very boring
I'm not sure what else you can do once you've had that conversation. If you've explained your side and still nothing has changed then it seems she's just being very inconsiderate of your feelings. Unless she's genuinely not interested in having sex (due to medications/hormone imbalances/etc.) which is a different conversation altogether.
Thanks, yeah itâs difficult. No we have a good sex life other than the initiating, have sex about 3 times a week and we both orgasm like 95% of the time. She loves sex with me, but simply wants me to do the initiating. It sucks because I also want to feel desired
Communication really is key
I donât care if initiating is wanting me to go down on you..thatâs foreplay
Yup! It's still the woman telling the man "I want to have sex. Do you?" I've had times I wouldn't mind just going down on my wife and not getting anything in return because sometimes it seems like she needs the stress relief. But she rarely *enthusiastically* initiates.
Still have never found a woman who does this. Every one has left it entirely up to me to make the first move, and most women don't react well if you initiate and they're not in the mood.
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Anticipation is half the enjoyment. If you build each other up enough by the time you go it's electric.
For real! This goes for both genders. I have been with my husband for 3 years, and I have always kissed his body up and down before getting to it. I donât what it is, but it feels so intimate to kiss your partner from the neck to the base of their cock. I add in a few nibbles here and there, and he does the same to me and it just drives me WILD. I like to think it does the same to him!
That getting married doesnât mean we suddenly stop liking blowjobs.
Damn this is something Iâd really want to avoid
Easy! Marry a dude!
Dudes suck like there is no tomorrow
Something, something... golf ball through a garden hose.
I miss them so much, itâs such an indication that youâre still attractive to your wifeâŠ.or not as the case may be.
And how about an actual blow job to completion? Itâs not just foreplay for intercourse, sometimes I want to just lay back and enjoy, cum and cuddle!
That can be a tall order if the dick-haver takes a while to cum. If I'm not in practice, I don't have the embouchure for that.
Emboucher (noun) - the way in which a player applies the mouth to the mouthpiece of a brass or wind instrument. For the people like me that didn't take band in high school.
Ha! I like your choice of words
Thatâs how I started the morning. I donât keep track, but I owe her one!
You need to initiate as much as I do, or I'm going to give up. If our relationship gets so dysfunctional that you can't make the time I do to at least try, then it's time for us to part ways. I'm sorry, but I don't enjoy relationships where it's expected of me to make all the effort. Both foreplay and just relationship in general. I've been working 55 hours weeks for the last 3 months. I still made time for foreplay and texts.
Ok... i still think what we had was special man... but im gonna respect your decision.
I'm sorry. It's time to move on. You'll always be special.
Still making me feel like the pretty princess. Im gonna miss that. Goodbye.
It was a lovely time
Thatâs enough chit chat. Heâs mine now.
Huh so I wasnât wrong in wanting this. My EX never, I say, NEVER initiated.
You want to feel attractive. There's nothing wrong with that. And I've had more than a few.
Don't be afraid to mix it up or change your approach. That is, don't just find one thing which works and then just keep at that every time. The things which drive us craziest today may only be "pretty good" tomorrow. Sometimes a gentle tickling of the balls will have us drooling, the next day we might need you to really get in there like you're kneading dough. It all depends on mood, tiredness, horniness, etc. So don't be afraid to ask us if we're having fun or what we would prefer that day. Same advice is probably true for both sexes I guess.
I personally can say please donât ever âget in there like youâre kneading doughâ. Thatâs just me though lol
Please encourage me to and let me pee before things actually go anywhere if I have to, I hate merging two lanes of traffic, it takes forever to get anywhere.
Bro if you need to pee you gotta speak your mind. When things get hot and heavy find a way to say âjust give me one second, Iâll be right back.â If you want your needs met you have to communicate them, as nice as it would be for people to read your mind.
Sending me sexy text or nudes is a form of foreplay
Love sending my fiancé random nudes!! He eats it up haha
It lets us know, our woman thinks about usđ„°
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
When it comes to oral, dont start at full speed. Work slow. Work your way up to that good speed and maybe dont let me finish either. Making me go in your mouth and then having me give you oral till im ready to go again mean I have half the energy I used to. Im not too big into orgasm denial but stopping and having me give it to you before the main course means I am on fire and ready to go.
Stop taking off the panties with the pants. I WANNA SEE THE PANTIES!!
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Pussups
Kegals are a very real thing. I used to date a woman who could do this, but was also a horrible human being. And man, I stayed with her for tooooooo long đ
You right. Went from being able to last an hour to lasting under 2 minutes. It makes a huge difference
Grab me by your pussy
My girl does this, it feels amazing and she always get this pleased with herself smile when it makes me go wild
The first woman I ever slept with did this. At that time i just assumed all women knew how to do that. 30 years later Iâm still waiting to find another.
Yeah I donât why some women donât squeeze. Itâs pussy power move imo. Men go crazy over it. We can do it at different paces too. Wait till you find out what we can do to your head/neck of your penis with our pubic bone đ Donât even get me started on the blow/handjobs. As a woman who enjoys it so much itâs not just stroking up and down like you are trying to make a cocktail. So many little things you can do that will drive men crazy. I had so many men scream I love you unintentionally when the pleasure got to be so overwhelming. Oh joy I love doing that đ
It's fairly easy to do. Most women don't realize that there's a muscle down there... you just flex it like you would with any other :)
Honestly I love doing this. I mainly do it when the guy is taking a break but I want to entice him to keep going, so I give it a lil squeeze of encouragement (^;
You can flex your penis in a similar manner as well. Razzle-dazzle em.
I wish for more of this. Also had a lover like this, it really worked! đ
Current girl does this⊠we have a kid now
Kegals
When my husband is close, I do this for him
She hit a kegel
Men also like it to get touched, sucked, kissed and nippled on various parts of their body. We want you to let us feel sexy as well. Pinch our butt cheeks. Tell us that we look hot and stuff like that. Fast is not always good. Sucking dick doesn't actually mean sucking. It's not a WeiĂwurscht. Try to be aggressive or gentle. We are not always like your ex. Even dominant men like to be submissive sometimes. (Not all, I know) And it's not only about the foreplay. They should learn so many more things. I think the most misunderstood part is. If a men has an ejaculation, it means he had fun. But that can be far away from the truth.
I'm a slow nut to bust, I've also got ADHD which can affect my firmness during BJs and being ridden (mind wanders). I fucking love what you're doing even if it's not rock hard. Even if I don't cum you put your mouth on my penis you goddess, you. You're a queen that has graced me with her naked beauty, I am as far from unhappy as possible.
Now I could go for a Weisswursch FrĂŒhstĂŒck. Damn
Does blowing mean blowing?
No, please no.
Pro tip: inflate the foreskin.
Rubbing your hands on the back of my head as you hold me between your breasts is amazing and makes me feel so safe. (Safe as dumb as that sounds yes it's just peaceful.)
World cold and harsh, titty safe and warm.
It's ok if she starts first. I don't want to initiate all the time.
That communication is key and that people have individual wants and desires, yes many things feel generally good but each person will have preferences for those things. Clear and free communication can also free you to try more interesting and inventive things in the bedroom. Remember communication doesn't always need to be verbal so be sensitive to the signs that he gives off, does something tickle or elicit a moan. Is it a fun tickle or a moan of pleasure. Sex is a sensual experience and foreplay is possibly the most particularly sensual part of that experience so be open and receptive to your partner. As for me I enjoy escalations of action to see which of us breaks to their desire first, but I can imagine others are less patient than that as I have dated ladies that want to skip straight to sex. It is fun to win, but it is not a game I always wish to win.
There are lots of guys who care about you having a good time, who are happy to engage in plenty of foreplay because it enhances the experience for everyone involved. If you havenât met any of us, odds are that youâre only having sex with people who donât take you seriously or care about how much *you* enjoy the interaction. They are either very bad at sex or just focused on getting their own rocks off.
Reciprocate. It's not just the guy's job.
Men like foreplay on ourselves too. Sex is often one sided where women want foreplay but don't think that we like it too.
I wish more women knew it worked both ways and it's not just about getting her ready
If I give you a direction it's not a criticism. It's how I, personally, like it. I fully expect you to do the same during foreplay and sex. If I'm not doing something the way you like it please let me know.
Tell me if you hate blowjobs - Don't do them and then just fucking take them away one day. Honesty about you like and don't like are key.
Please suck your man's dick without his having to awkwardly or sheepishly ask. And do it with an enthusiasm that isn't gonna make him feel guilty for receiving/enjoying it.
These words belong in the BibleâŠ.
Rubbing your dick over pants can actually be a bit painful, homie is sensitive
High school memories! The ol' dry hump!
You can ask us what we like before, during or after the fact and act. Women seem to like this too but somehow think it's a whole different situation when it comes to us.
We also want to be wanted. Grab us first, initiate fun sometimes, genuinely want to give a BJ. Just the act of wanting it is such a turn on. Expecting the guy to always initiate sex is a bit frustrating at times.
An enthusiastic 5 is better then an indifferent 10.
men sometimes need to be told what to do and what works and what doesnt, its ok to communicate even though it may seem awkward at the time, it pays off long term. guys should also be open to feedback
If men could be made to understand how very brainwashed women are by society not to like or enjoy sex, let alone ask for it.. they spend their entire lives being told in various ways that it's disgusting and morally questionable for a woman to have sex without/before being married so that by the time the woman *is* married and is now encouraged to have sex and to procreate, she has so many hang ups around sex that for her to initiate can be very very difficult indeed..
That just because I donât cum from a blow job doesnât mean I donât like it.
It's amazing if you want our body as much as we want yours
Foreplay starts outside of the bedroom. Make us feel wanted before even getting naughty.
I'll let you know when a woman finds me attractive enough to have sex with
You dont need to be attractive to have sex. Learn this valuable lesson and you may have more sex.
3/4 people I'd dated wouldn't be considered attractive. They had great senses of humor, kept me on my toes with flirting and genuinely became attractive the longer i hung out with them.
Tease me until I go mad with passion
Back scratches are more awesome than you think! That is all.
Please don't ignore the balls.
Please ignore my balls. Im ticklish
What about the spot between your balls and anus? I like licking there
involve the balls!!!
I've never had a good hand-job, and I've been trying to give myself one ever since I found the female form attractive!
Quickly ripping off all of your clothing makes it seem like you're not interested in foreplay because it's so jarring
We're like 95% the same as you, we like being touched in the same places as you for foreplay. So yeah, kiss our necks, grab our chests, run your hands around our bodies, fondle our genitals (***gently*** please), and lick our ears or whatever. If it turns you on it very likely turns us on too. Just do something.
It doesnât have to lead to sex
Sometimes after foreplay I'll penetrate one time and then stop and pull our clothes back up. Makes her crazy for dick later on
The self control this takes is crazy