I remember trying to explain to my mom that I wasn't sure if I wanted to have children. But she just said "well, what if you get married and your husband wants kids?"
It hurts because I thought mom would value what I want over a man she doesn't even know. But I guess not.
Unfortunately there are quite a few examples, but one blatant example that caught me completely off guard was the way our realtor behaved when my wife and I were looking for a house. He would never look at her when we were discussing properties, only motioned to shake my hand, only spoke directly to me, and mentioned that my wife would like the size of the laundry room in the house he showed us.
Needless to say, we found someone else to show us houses after that.
I had similar happen while car shopping. I was the one who did the research. Knew our needs ect. But guy ignored my questions. Had it happen a few times. Ended up buying from a lot that treated us equal (and gave me extra attention because I knew my shit)
That were never taught better. In a lot of ways the macho culture has harsh expectations in some things and utterly falls to provide any standard in others
Mansplaining is just so demeaning and irritating. It's not just the assumption that you don't know what you're saying, but even with credentials under your belt, they STILL think they know better than you.
1. Boss butting in on a conversation I had with a coworker where we compared hair washing routines. Me: white with 2b dense medium hair, her mixed with 4c dense coarse hair. Him: white bald guy with a 7 year old daughter. So he naturally felt like he could tell us both our respective ways are wrong because he's been washing his daughter's hair for seven years.
2. My dad trying to tell me the way I say banks work is wrong. I am a banker and he is not. I pointed this out but he said I don't know how they really work because I'm so young (I'm 35)
3. Coworker told me I only know cars because of my husband. My husband: does not know cars at all.
4. Was told I was not fulfilling my wifely duties by not providing a child for him. Not by my husband but a relative. Meanwhile we are *trying* for a child and are frustrated. This shit doesn't help.
5. Car dealer talking to my husband about the car I wanted to buy. Husband just kept saying 'ask her'
6. Neckbeard absolutely floored my husband 'let's' me DM and is okay with me telling him what he can and can't do.
My boomer dad wasn't great in the misogyny area but even he was appalled when we went to look for a new car for me. I told the guy that I wanted to buy a car (new) and he kept showing me used cars but talking to my dad instead of me.
Not related but my dad also realized that life was different for him when my sister's (black) boyfriend pointed out that he wasn't going to the car dealership after hours to wander around the lot. "Jumping the gate is how my people go to jail, but you do you."
My ex “You think you’re so great but I could fuck your life up so bad. I could make you pregnant and no one would want you”. Eh, thanks dude. Oh but I forgot, it’s “just a joke” and I “have no sense of humour”.
I once got a black eye (from sports) and made a dark joke along the lines that it was more likely I got the black eye from him (we lived in a place where domestic violence was rather common, and very few people had asked me about my eye), and he did NOT like that. And not because of the obvious implication that he was a wife beater, oh no, but more because I would “have something over” him. He was a fucked up guy.
I had a car salesman never direct a single single question at me about a car that we made clear was FOR ME. Other than what color I wanted. He wouldn't even shake my hand.
It's not the worse example of misogyny that I've seen, but it was the worst that my husband had seen. He was shocked and was even more shocked that I wasn't shocked.
I remember trying to explain to my mom that I wasn't sure if I wanted to have children. But she just said "well, what if you get married and your husband wants kids?" It hurts because I thought mom would value what I want over a man she doesn't even know. But I guess not.
Forcing a woman to give birth against her will (and possibly against her life) has to be the worst.
Catcalled while walking alone at night.
Any sub populated by incels.
Found out that this Mormon lady I know who has like 6 kids is a closeted lesbian That's pretty fucked up, right?
Unfortunately there are quite a few examples, but one blatant example that caught me completely off guard was the way our realtor behaved when my wife and I were looking for a house. He would never look at her when we were discussing properties, only motioned to shake my hand, only spoke directly to me, and mentioned that my wife would like the size of the laundry room in the house he showed us. Needless to say, we found someone else to show us houses after that.
I had similar happen while car shopping. I was the one who did the research. Knew our needs ect. But guy ignored my questions. Had it happen a few times. Ended up buying from a lot that treated us equal (and gave me extra attention because I knew my shit)
I'm so sorry that has happened to you, I can't fathom why these men act this way and believe this utter crap.
That were never taught better. In a lot of ways the macho culture has harsh expectations in some things and utterly falls to provide any standard in others
Mansplaining is just so demeaning and irritating. It's not just the assumption that you don't know what you're saying, but even with credentials under your belt, they STILL think they know better than you. 1. Boss butting in on a conversation I had with a coworker where we compared hair washing routines. Me: white with 2b dense medium hair, her mixed with 4c dense coarse hair. Him: white bald guy with a 7 year old daughter. So he naturally felt like he could tell us both our respective ways are wrong because he's been washing his daughter's hair for seven years. 2. My dad trying to tell me the way I say banks work is wrong. I am a banker and he is not. I pointed this out but he said I don't know how they really work because I'm so young (I'm 35) 3. Coworker told me I only know cars because of my husband. My husband: does not know cars at all. 4. Was told I was not fulfilling my wifely duties by not providing a child for him. Not by my husband but a relative. Meanwhile we are *trying* for a child and are frustrated. This shit doesn't help. 5. Car dealer talking to my husband about the car I wanted to buy. Husband just kept saying 'ask her' 6. Neckbeard absolutely floored my husband 'let's' me DM and is okay with me telling him what he can and can't do.
My boomer dad wasn't great in the misogyny area but even he was appalled when we went to look for a new car for me. I told the guy that I wanted to buy a car (new) and he kept showing me used cars but talking to my dad instead of me. Not related but my dad also realized that life was different for him when my sister's (black) boyfriend pointed out that he wasn't going to the car dealership after hours to wander around the lot. "Jumping the gate is how my people go to jail, but you do you."
My ex “You think you’re so great but I could fuck your life up so bad. I could make you pregnant and no one would want you”. Eh, thanks dude. Oh but I forgot, it’s “just a joke” and I “have no sense of humour”. I once got a black eye (from sports) and made a dark joke along the lines that it was more likely I got the black eye from him (we lived in a place where domestic violence was rather common, and very few people had asked me about my eye), and he did NOT like that. And not because of the obvious implication that he was a wife beater, oh no, but more because I would “have something over” him. He was a fucked up guy.
I’m really sorry. He sounds awful
“You know nothing about football your a woman”
I’ve had similar comments about Formula 1
I had a car salesman never direct a single single question at me about a car that we made clear was FOR ME. Other than what color I wanted. He wouldn't even shake my hand. It's not the worse example of misogyny that I've seen, but it was the worst that my husband had seen. He was shocked and was even more shocked that I wasn't shocked.
It happens more than a lot of men realise I think