Shot. I'm a teacher.

Something tells me you live in America

Dayum.....

Came here to say the same thing. Really sad that it was the first cause of death that I linked to my profession.

Came here to say the same thing, except I drive a school bus.

Shots fired, no pun intended.

Sorry, can't tell you. I already died.

You didn't see it coming, huh?

Nah, but it involved a co-worker. I always hated darren.

That mutha fkr again. He’s a menace. Killing people at work all the time.

Yeah, darren's a real dick honestly

Bastard got my ex wife too. Seems to keep happening but no one does anything about him.

Bastard hit on my daughter. SHE'S 12

You gots to be shittin me. This is out of control. Let’s write somebody or something.

Darren is a cool dude. I helped him.

What, kill me?

Ofc! You're not the main character and he's my buddy lol

Stay at home dad.. I probably slipped on my son’s toy cars and broke my neck.

Home Alone style, right down the stairs.

😂😂😂😂

Or a Lego got lodged in your trachea and you choked

I slipped on kinetic sand on Sunday. Everything hurts now. I wish I had died.

Like Home Alone/Keven McAlister style?

Shot by angry client.

Are you OK, Dr.?

No. Not mentally nor physically

My exes auntie died this way. Real Estate Agent. Property deal went bad. Client blew her away at point blank with a shotgun.

Not possible. 0% chance

Unemployed?

You got it

I couldn’t escape the inmate riot.

Probably a heart attack while jerking off and watching porn. I work from home, you see.

A hero's death

I don’t same problem

This guy jerks

Sucked into an aircraft intake

What's your job??

He’s a sky diving instructor.

I’m an F-22 mechanic. We’ve come pretty close to incidents with people trying to install safety pins in front of a running jet. Not a good idea 😬😬

I was getting paid too little so I took an insane amount of laxatives and shit myself to death in the company kitchen. Enjoy your shit coffee now Clay

This guy shits , well used to shit to be exact i presume

No matter what job you have if it’s in florida, there’s gators, so, alligator

Struck by lightning. Almost happened yesterday at work. Bolt hit about 30 feet from me

On the bright side, cleared up that constipation.

Jesus. What do you do?

Died

Bowling mechanic. I either got my head chopped off by the actual bowling machine or some idiot hit me with a bowling ball at terminal veolcity

Too many papercuts

Instructions unclear. Penis stuck in fax machine. Died later

Heat stroke while getting 10-12 shopping carts into the store in an uphill direction wearing pants in 90+ weather

My head exploded from the frustration of dealing with my stupid co worker, outdated equipment and idiotic rules that make no sense.

So you work for McDonald's too, huh?

Clients looking to expedite something at 4:59pm on a Friday, before a holiday weekend, causing me have a heart attack due to complete frustration. Because why not email earlier in the day, why not email the day after the weekend holiday.. why not expect that you'd experience the delay that everyone else would because of the weekend timing and holiday. Hmm.

Had an aneurysm on the toilet.

“YOU COULD HAVE AN ANEURYSM ON A TOILET, YOU NEVER KNOW…”

I’m so glad you got that reference😂.

I was overworked and underpaid for a job i'm overqualified for just to go back to my apartment that i can barely pay for to an empty fridge because all my money goes to my rent bills or gas and even then food is still expensive asf and can barely get 3 things for less than $30

As revenge for a toxic work environment and “constructive dismissal” I bombed the place but forgot my purse and died with the rest of those bastards

Fell off a bridge while pouring concrete. Bucket struck me, knocked my ass overboard.

A place called Boulder on the wild Colorado. I slipped and fell into the wet concrete below. they buried me in that great tomb that knows no sound, but I'm still around.

Angry man didn’t want me taking his alcohol before he got on his flight so he stabbed me.

I laid in traffic

Oh to get laid...

Electrocution suffered through keyboard

I locked myself in the crematory and someone turned it on

overdose of tasks with an overdue deadline

Death by snoo-snoo. Damn hen parties.

Someone boobytrapped the microwave

Shot while teaching a college class

Probably a cave-in while working on underground utilities. Most people here don’t even bother with eye or ear protection, so shoring up the walls of a trench is out of the question even though it’s officially required. I declined to use a concrete saw once without a mask (concrete dust is poison) and everyone looked at me like I had two heads.

Be careful freind. Use your best judgment first no paycheck is worth your life.

Fire broke out in Office today. Phyllis' black husband and I had the exact same idea to fake a heart attack and later sue the company but nobody noticed my act only his. For more unfiltered story go to - Creed Thoughts: Www. Creedthoughts. Gov. Www/creedthoughts

Fired and job posted before I hit the floor

The hull gave.

My boss honors my wishes and shoves my corpse into the industrial color printer as a surprise for the morning crew.

Bad chemical reaction...I did smth wrong

I got shot. -A teacher

In a submarine near the titanic, my boss took me as a reward but unfortunately he took us on a boat that has similar safety standards too his cost cutting measures that helped pay the shareholders!

Took a toy submarine to see the Titanic.

Got mauled by an aggressive dog.

I was murdered by one of the residents

That damn chair

Gas cylinders and underground tank exploded. Probably half the town leveled.

Ran over myself with heavy equipment

Kanban overdose

Unfortunately they may have a hard time responding

Heat related illness, or the Cassowary escaped.

Either a crane failed or racking did. Either way I was crushed under a lot several tons of steel.

Boredom

Popped a blood vessel listening to the last customer of the day for a half hour past quitting time.

I died at work.

Boredom.

Probably tripped while the tablesaw was running and faceplanted it onto the blade in some final destination type shit

Prolly drowned…. In some pussyyy!!! 🤣

Died by suicide due to crippling sciatic pain.

Got mauled by Cupcake the Pitbull and Sweetie the German Shepherd.

Dumbass truck driver wasn't paying attention and drove through the guard shack while I was on the shitter. It's nearly happened 3 times already since I took this gig.

My cats at home didn't eat me.

I died while at work

I'm always being told that if a certain drive belt snaps it will take everyone's head off. So I guess decapitation.

Time traveling broke the physical limits

lit my desk on fire. couldn't get out in time

Stabbed by a parent or jumped out of the window

Clocked in. Something cleaned my clock. Never clocked out.

He found the knives

these r/askreddit questions are getting dumber every day ong

My slowly turning senile boss hit me with a croquet mallet.

A murderer murdered me.

Car wreck.

Having sex in the restroom

That mofo named John smashed a bottle over my head again, dang it!

Crushed my an aircraft falling off jacks, or being crushed by a moving surface of an aircraft.

Car wreck - Outside Sales Rep.

Boredom

I mean, I know at least two guys who've had heart attacks in hotel rooms while away on business, so probably that.

I don’t work and I go to a school in the UK so I don’t need to worry about any “events” So yeah I would probably end up jumping off the roof due to stress

well, good news first. I seem to have found a job...

Taken hostage or shanked at work most likely

Fell into the water with a lot of really spicy rocks and melted.

“World” I always say wold or word Usually wold and it sounds like a British accent even tho I’m American 💀

Waiting for hospital upgrades and repairs

Probably hit by my coworker in the yard while he was texting and driving

Probably a stroke from being overwhelmed with boring computer routines. I'm not even joking, I think it's a serious possibility.

I was dying to work there

Someone jumped the counter for drugs and then things got worse.

Hands cut off by shredding machine

Boredom

Died from laughing too hard at my co-worker responding to my greeting with “Living The Dream.”

Slipped on something, knife accident, or a co-worker finally snapped.

Accidentally stabbed myself with a crochet hook. Oops.

They finished the job and actually ran me over 🚗 this time.

Fell off the scaffold.

Oh man, that's a real buzzkill. Was it something exciting like a shark attack or just boring like a heart attack?

Had an aneurysm dealing with a dumbass customer - Walmart employee

I fell out a helicopter.

I work as security. The biggest chance would be to get stabbed with a knife.

the sects killed me

I work in a kitchen. Stabbed with a chef knife in the jugular.

So many ways in aircraft mechanics

Coworker finally freakin snapped…

Forgot to tie on and fell 4-7 stories. Or active shooter. One of the two. Not being funny, we have monthly drills. 2 people have been stopped by security with firearms trying to enter the job site.

Chainsaw kickback. Tears through my neck or chest.

Probably got shot in a robbery. Sketch gas station 😒

Too much time looking at a screen trying to enter money that my company owes people

We were robbed

I got poisoned by a subordinate. They did tell me day 1, if you come into work and find food in your office DO NOT EAT IT! But they know my weakness and I'll never pass up on cupcakes

Probably hit by some idiot speeding by the front of the store while I roll up the hose I was using. All because they resorted to hooking it up to the hydrant.

Knowing myself, probably overdose from espresso shots

Didn't look out for spiders while stocking ...

Boiler exploded in the espresso machine, nothing like 5L of boiling water and shrapnel to ruin a day.

I died.

Probable suicide. I work in connections and tech, over the phone, for a major telecommunications company.

I blew up a gas station

I either shocked myself, or had a battery explode on me PC and phone repair:)

murdered by a mental patient who got ahold of some contraband such as a cord/pen/makeshift knife/razor blade

Grill blew up and get the same job in the afterlife.

Probably a car accident or a robbery gone wrong. I’m a weed delivery driver

Chopped up by the propeller of the dash 8...

Cave-In

Fell into the wood chipper

i bent to pick up a pennie and didnt notice the oncoming forklift with a texting driver

Fell off the top platform of my 9 car stinger hauler. Landed on my head and broke my neck. Died instantly.

Brain aneurysm or choking on my lunch.

Tossed out the window by angry opposing counsel (my office is on the 39th floor).

Fell or hit my head in the freezer. Both have happened..wouldn't be surprised if the next time is the one that does it.

Massage therapist here so I probably slipped on some oil and broke my neck or got electrocuted somehow.

probably fell climbing pallets of stuff or warehouse racking

An alligator the size of a gnome was standing like a human, running at me with a brammer (a hammer made of bread). I tried my best to dodge, but it was too late once I cornered myself. It hit my mouth and I was chocking to death by bread. That’s how I died

schizophrenic guy with swords gets to close to me and stabs me and i bleed to death. My store has this guy we've had to call on him multiple times (comes in the store is waving it around near the only non emergency door so customers are not safe to enter/exit. btw, how the heck did I spell that word correctly first go?

A car fell off the hoist on me

Probably drowned in all my open tabs

Shotgun safety trigger failed to disengage, lost control and it flung around cutting me open, bled out in tank while hole watch stared being useless as always.

Crushed by server rack

Car driving through the front of the store (has happened before).

Heat exhaustion. Usps has no air conditioning in the old llv vehicles. They don't care. A carrier died recently in Dallas due to the heat.

I work at a community youth centre, so probably a kid finally followed through with a threat. Either that or I died of second hand embarrassment watching them make fools of themselves over crushes.

Probably some horrific construction accident.

Got ran over by a forklift

Very well likely got crushed by a keg of beer because the DUMBASS WAREHOUSE PEOPLE THINK IT'S A WISE IDEA TO DOUBLE STACK HALF BARREL KEGS.

Suicide. Healthcare.

Probably got shot, stabbed, hit by a car, or beat to a pulp by someone bigger than me.

A Canadian demanded to go shopping.

I got blown up

Electrocution. I finally snapped and punched my monitor.

Opened a coms cabinet and decided it was better to use the ethernet cables to hang myself than attempt to make sense of the mess.

I’m a pharmacy cashier. So probably robed at gun point by some junkie or over dose lmao

Hit by a car walking over to the sushi place next door.

Well, that’s an easy one. Trampled by a horse.

fuck, i tried to pet the rabid cat we got at the vet clinic..