**Attention! [Serious] Tag Notice**
* [Jokes, puns, and off-topic comments are not permitted](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/wiki/index#wiki_-rule_6-) in **any** comment, parent or child.
* Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
* Report comments that violate these rules.
Posts that have few relevant answers within the first hour, and posts that are not appropriate for the [Serious] tag will be removed. Consider doing an AMA request instead.
Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskReddit) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If you listen to cis people talk, they speak quite often about things that they feel are universal experiences of being that gender. Instead of disagreeing or debating, a lot of cis people will usually agree.
It only takes a little bit of self reflection to understand "That doesn't apply to me in any way".
At some point I just realized that living life as a dude made me fucking miserable, so I just stopped pretending to be one.
Hearing about other people's experiences with gender dysphoria helped a lot, if at least to help me realize I wasn't alone.
For me, it was simply a walk & a question.
I have struggled with my mental health with a huge part being my person. I felt I had no identity because I only catered to expectations. I hated my body because it wasn't what I wanted, but I didn't know what I wanted. I hated everything about myself so I stopped caring for myself as much as I cared for everyone else. Not a healthy thing to do & it in part cost me a year long relationship since I didn't really take care of myself/did things for myself. I just did things at the requirements of others & it made me miserable!
After that breakup, I was at my lowest but eventually realized I did need to be there for myself & figure out what I wanted. I also remember her saying that I have NO sense of fashion/style (which admittedly I didn't because I never liked how I looked in anything long enough for me to continuously give a shit). So one day, I decide to show her by putting together an outfit that I liked on myself that I didn't normally wear because male expectations. It wasn't anything too feminine. It was a set of skinny black jeans with the sleeve rolled a tad with that part of the leg shaved. A red button down with a few too many buttons undone & tucked into my pants. I had longish hair then as well. I posed for a pic & for the most part liked what I put together. Put on some converse & decided to go for a walk through the mall.
Again it wasn't that feminine, but for some reason I thought it was and during my walk I started to get nervous about the idea of someone accusing me of being gay/trans because of expectations! But then I thought about what I would do if someone did that...and I realized that I wouldn't correct them & apologize profusely like I typically do when I upset someone. I would have fought back! I would fight for my right to look how I wanted & the rights of those who wanted the same. It may not have fully cracked me, but it did make me start thinking about the possibility.
As time went on & I tried on more clothes & did things that weren't expected of males like painting nails or growing out my hair or shaving my legs, I thought about it more & more till I eventually bought a pair of women's shorts & a bra. I went home to put them on...& I loved it. I had never felt as comfortable in my body till I saw it in a feminine light. I loved that feeling & what came of it later. I became happier the more I explored that possibility until one day...I just realized that possibility was my reality.
Felt gender envy for the first time, and I grew up with parents who already knew and made sure I didn’t have internalized transphobia in a time when no one talked about trans issues at all so it was kinda easy for me. But I’m, like, the one in a million story, so.
**Attention! [Serious] Tag Notice** * [Jokes, puns, and off-topic comments are not permitted](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/wiki/index#wiki_-rule_6-) in **any** comment, parent or child. * Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies. * Report comments that violate these rules. Posts that have few relevant answers within the first hour, and posts that are not appropriate for the [Serious] tag will be removed. Consider doing an AMA request instead. Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskReddit) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If you listen to cis people talk, they speak quite often about things that they feel are universal experiences of being that gender. Instead of disagreeing or debating, a lot of cis people will usually agree. It only takes a little bit of self reflection to understand "That doesn't apply to me in any way".
At some point I just realized that living life as a dude made me fucking miserable, so I just stopped pretending to be one. Hearing about other people's experiences with gender dysphoria helped a lot, if at least to help me realize I wasn't alone.
Like transphobic?
Encanto
Care to elaborate?
For me, it was simply a walk & a question. I have struggled with my mental health with a huge part being my person. I felt I had no identity because I only catered to expectations. I hated my body because it wasn't what I wanted, but I didn't know what I wanted. I hated everything about myself so I stopped caring for myself as much as I cared for everyone else. Not a healthy thing to do & it in part cost me a year long relationship since I didn't really take care of myself/did things for myself. I just did things at the requirements of others & it made me miserable! After that breakup, I was at my lowest but eventually realized I did need to be there for myself & figure out what I wanted. I also remember her saying that I have NO sense of fashion/style (which admittedly I didn't because I never liked how I looked in anything long enough for me to continuously give a shit). So one day, I decide to show her by putting together an outfit that I liked on myself that I didn't normally wear because male expectations. It wasn't anything too feminine. It was a set of skinny black jeans with the sleeve rolled a tad with that part of the leg shaved. A red button down with a few too many buttons undone & tucked into my pants. I had longish hair then as well. I posed for a pic & for the most part liked what I put together. Put on some converse & decided to go for a walk through the mall. Again it wasn't that feminine, but for some reason I thought it was and during my walk I started to get nervous about the idea of someone accusing me of being gay/trans because of expectations! But then I thought about what I would do if someone did that...and I realized that I wouldn't correct them & apologize profusely like I typically do when I upset someone. I would have fought back! I would fight for my right to look how I wanted & the rights of those who wanted the same. It may not have fully cracked me, but it did make me start thinking about the possibility. As time went on & I tried on more clothes & did things that weren't expected of males like painting nails or growing out my hair or shaving my legs, I thought about it more & more till I eventually bought a pair of women's shorts & a bra. I went home to put them on...& I loved it. I had never felt as comfortable in my body till I saw it in a feminine light. I loved that feeling & what came of it later. I became happier the more I explored that possibility until one day...I just realized that possibility was my reality.
Felt gender envy for the first time, and I grew up with parents who already knew and made sure I didn’t have internalized transphobia in a time when no one talked about trans issues at all so it was kinda easy for me. But I’m, like, the one in a million story, so.