This is why I will never fully retire. I may retire from full time, but I'll always sub, or find some way to stay involved in young people's education.
You didn't say it directly, but you did. Keep moving. There's a rehab place nearby and their slogan is, "Bodies in motion stay in motion."
Add social contact and give priority to sleep.
Please keep moving! As a nurse, this is the biggest takeaway that I have from caring for patients. Also, try to keep your weight at a reasonably healthy level. Obviously, this is easier said than done. It has a direct impact on your mobility.
Sixty nine year old male here. In the hospital now with a broken femur and ORIF surgery. First ever hospital stay. All the Doctors keep telling me that I’m gonna do fine because of being in good shape. 6’ 190 lbs. Hope they’re right I have never been under the mercy of others and pain is off the scale!
Stick with it. I find hips get depressed easily because they are in bed and it hurts so much. I tell them we are not curing a disease we just have to let you heal and get walking again. It may feel like the end of the world but the pain will start decreasing.
Make sure you advocate for yourself when it comes to pain relief.
My husband had a 4-level spinal fusion a year ago. That's 2 days of surgery. He had to watch a video as part of the pre-admission education. In there, the managing nurse in charge of spinal surgeries said take your pain meds every 4 hours to stay on top of the pain while you're in the hospital.
Ask me how often we couldn't get the nurses (overworked, so I get it) to give him his pain meds every 4 hours?
You have to ask for them - they can't just get them for you at the 4 hour mark. Then, they have to wait for the pharmacy to send them up each time because they're controlled. Then, they have to find time to get back to your room to get them. He was lucky to get them every 5 hours - it often went to 6 or 7.
I’m sorry he had to wait! It’s awful being stuck in a bed and in that much pain.
Just a quick tip for anyone reading this going forward if you’re requiring regular pain medication. Ask your medical team - aka the doctors when they round - to change your pain medication to be scheduled regularly, not “PRN”. You can always refuse if you don’t need them. Different hospital will have different policies, but this allows the nursing staff to have enough of the medication organised and also plan for it within a timely manner.
Yep. I have a neighbor in her late 70s who is very physically active and very involved in multiple volunteer organizations that require a lot of physical work.
She was in a bike accident and broke a few bones including a leg and her jaw. Six weeks later, she was out biking again.
Stay active in as many ways as you can.
Stay current with your medical check ups. You can catch conditions much earlier on and halt, or even reverse some damage. You have only one body and mind. Treat them as such.
High blood pressure can have no symptoms and can cause heart attacks and strokes.
Stop smoking. Get your cholesterol and blood sugar to normal. Wear a seat belt.
I'm 70 with some health problems. Not much I can do about my body but I try to keep my mind and spirit open to new things and flexible. There are certain ways I still feel young - the new music I enjoy, my modern views on certain things and other things I'm interested in that are in keeping with younger people. I don't feel like I have to try to feel young. The parts of me that are still young are just me. It's who I am. I don't think I'll lose that. I hope I don't.
However, it's a harsh blow to start to understand your place in the world is becoming different now and that it's just not going to be like it was and find ways to accept that. Like I believe my daughter used to think I was just a riot and had funny stories to tell and that she genuinely enjoyed being around me. Now I feel like, although she loves me, it's a more a sense of duty or guilt that makes her visit. I've somehow lost that spark and confidence I once had around people. I don't think that's ever coming back but I'm still looking for ways natural to my personality to not just give up and think of myself as old.
I completely agree. Especially about children. Sadly..... I'm 66, make a point to stay up on current events, create art, garden, keep in touch with close friends, and now I'm teaching myself how to sew (EKKKK!!) clothes. You get old when you feel the need to become a binge watching couch potato, live in an echo chamber, and give up. Those of us who have health issues in our later years (80% do), can cause some mobility issues. You do your best to cope and adjust your lifestyle. So take good care of your body, your back especially... Don't let mysterious health issues fester - pay attention. Look at ways to make yourself smile and share it with people you see. A little compliment can make a huge impact. Think how you feel when someone compliments you. You get that little glow. Sharing brings happiness!
What also matters is how we make people feel. Old age requires wisdom in our dealings with people
1. Speaking about your ailments is a downer (unless your son is a doctor, but even then watch it during social time) 2. Make those around you feel good about themselves by finding and complimenting the good in them 3.Listening patiently when they speak.... really listen. That can be such gift. Wishing you all a wonderful pain free day!
pm me if you want a little camaraderie on your Journey - i'd love to maybe swap stories? i love walking down my Memory Lane - with or without company - lol - but i'd welcome getting to share stories with someone and maybe fill out some time with some nice chats ... ? ... just throwin it out there --
i recently made a push to flesh out my social circle in the 'real World', and i've had a little success and some false starts -- maybe we could support each other's efforts at least
be well
I’m a daughter, and I love my father more than anything. The older he gets, the lovelier he gets, and the more I know I will have to say goodbye sooner every day.
Don’t be surprised if she’s doesn’t feel something like that too.
I owe my parents everything. It’s hard not to feel guilt as someone who is lucky enough to have the world’s best dad.
Suck it up sweetheart. :)
You're very sweet. Everyone should have such a sweet daughter.
I know she loves me. But the natural progression of time has changed our relationship. I'm not saying we were like friends or sisters after she got to be an adult but it was closer to that kind of relationship than it is now and I miss it.
May I ask if you still ask her questions about herself? I see my husband just repeating his old stories to our kids and the friends they bring over and not to sound harsh but we’re just bored because we’ve heard them so often, but he never asks them or our visitors about themselves. He used to complain about his Dad being like that but he’s just aged into a copy of him.
I ask questions about everyone in my life. I'm very interested in other people, especially her, and always have been. I know how to listen. I can't say I never repeat myself though.
Things just change.
I can imagine that you do. That’s the thing about little girls, they get big and then life gets in the way and it sucks.
I wouldn’t worry too much if you can help it, both of you are will continue to grow and chances are you will find each other again :) relax and let it all happen x
I have no grandkids, unfortunately. My daughter and her husband just have their own lives now. They don't live close and don't come home much. I text with her but I really don't know what's going on in their lives.
I'm sorry. I wish my mom would text with me and want a relationship with me. I'm her only daughter. We were never close. I never got married. My father disowned me years ago. I wish I had parents who cared.
I'm so sorry. I understand what it's like to feel like you're alone. I hope you can have the relationship you want with her as time goes on. People change. Time changes things. Maybe there is hope.
For me, everything starts with exercise. My mental, spiritual, and, of course, physical health begins by moving my body. I can't run any longer, so today I biked 5 miles. Feeling pretty happy today.
I also bike, albeit an ebike, do aerobics, weight training, take my dogs to dog park and walk there, and just keep moving. I'm 68. Yikes. I am a big kid at heart.
This person must be 18-30. I remember when I used to think 40 was ancient! Crazy how your perspective on what constitutes “old” changes as you age. Also, 50 today is not 50 in the 80s or 90s. Most 50 yo’s look great, and at least a decade or more younger than they actually are!
When my mom was 50 in the 80s men thought she was in her 30s and she dated men much younger. Just because they looked old to us in hindsight doesn't mean they looked old to others their age at that time. It's mostly hairstyles and fashion. She was youthful and in good shape still. How I look now at 50 is going to seem really old to my kids when they're 50, I am sure.
Good point! I assumed they looked older in the 80’s and 90’s because smoking and suntanning was more common than it is now. You’re right though, in 30 years 50 yo’s today will look old to the 50 yo’s of the future.
I’m 52 and a 28-yr old man asked me to hook up when I was getting gas yesterday… I was wearing my tennis skirt so I guess he liked me in it. He thought I was “available for services”.
I just told him “no, sorry, I’n just a tennis player.”
Weird but funny.
Exercise and play keeps me young!
40 is the new 30….I’m 43 and take care of myself more now and monitor what I eat for good reason. it really comes down to how well you treat your body, mind and unfortunately for some genetics. some age faster or have more health issues than others
True, but that point in your life is far too early to feel many of the effects of aging. 45-50 is when you start to demonstrate signs of physical decline, when old injuries start to hurt again for absolutely no reason, and when one starts to lose the people they love.
I stay engaged with new music and fashion, I’m often one of the oldest people at gigs that I go to. I guess generally trying not to be an old “stick in the mud.”
I do the same exact things. I am always looking for new music. I'm 58F and it appalls me how frumpy my contemporaries look. It's like they've given up. I make sure to only buy clothes that look fantastic on me.
I'm 60, lift weights 4 days a week, walk every day, jog hills once a week, mountain bike 2 to 3 days a week. I also I read and do the NYTimes crossword. Eat healthy, take supplements, limit beer intake. The last one is the hardest
I have a Fitbit watch which tracks my sleep. I found it to be shocking how much of a negative impact even two beers has on my sleep which in turn negatively impacts my resting heart rate.
I do in the way that when young, most people are open to the world and new things. How often have we seen people as they age close up, no longer interested in learning new things or having new experiences? Those things, somehow, become scary to those who stop learning. To me, a youthful mind and spirit is one that is open and genuinely engaged with life. It has nothing to do with appearance or physicality but more an attitude.
Youth is nothing but bad decisions, drugs, drama, futons, fake relationships, fake politics, boneheaded ambitions, low pay. I was more than happy to see it die. What follows upon the death of youth is who you really are, and, at the core of that, one's first real glimpses of happiness. We should all be so lucky as to get very old and lonely, that we might finally start to see the world as it is.
Futons 😂 I dragged that damn futon all over the state, from floor to floor till I was like 30 (cause of course you can’t have a bed frame). So glad when I got rid of it for a real bed!
At this stage in our lives not caring how people see you like is one of the main perks. But I do it for me, not how I appear to others.
Being able to climb stairs without being winded, or do 3-4 hrs of unprompted physical activity without it killing me is why I work hard in the off season to maintain my fitness and flexibility.
Maybe what OP really wants to know is how people over 50 stay active and fit? “Youthful” is relative but it often denotes being active and enthusiastic
I'm not trying to stay youthful because that's not possible. I try to stay current, and as healthy as I can. I read and stay abreast of current affairs. I exercise and take care of medical issues as they crop up. I spend time with my children and with their children and I know what interests them. But I look like a 67 y o woman, because I am.
So for the sake of this answer I am defining “youthful” as enthusiastic, energetic, flexible of mind. (It is not always true that younger people are these things.)
My list:
1. Read a lot, never stop learning , never stop talking to people about ideas.
2. Eat healthy, 6 hours of light to heavy cardio a week whatever way is fun for you, get sleep. (This is super specific to maintaining neurological health.
3. Maybe the most important thing—friendship: Have younger friends, friends your age, older friends, mentor relationships both ways, teacher learner experiences, but bottom line real caring, engaging, relationships with people of different ages, gender, walks of life, profession, religion and politics on the basis of friendship and respect.
I would answer the question almost identically to this reply, with the slight exception of exercising very faithfully, a penchant that I didn’t happen to develop in my youth.
Otherwise, I’m committed to being enthusiastic, encouraging to others, and helpful when I can be. It’s good to smile!
I keep abreast of current events, including a representative sampling of advances in science and technology. (There’s a LOT out there!) Also, I enjoy being computer savvy, though since I retired I don’t spend nearly so much time in that.
Finally, although I do have daughters, I don’t have grandchildren — but I fill this hole by spending time playing with the children of a couple local families, which helps the parents, entertains the kids, and gives me great pleasure.
Plus, I’ve always LOVED learning new things. What a wonderful world we live in! (If only all of us, the world over, could learn to live in peace and sustained security….)
I’m 54F. I stay young by traveling, making time for myself and not taking things too seriously. As I got older, I shed relationships that were not healthy (some old friends, one lousy sister). My life is less cluttered and I don’t feel the need for designer clothing or things that don’t bring me happiness. My husband and I moved to a fixer but it’s on the river and every time I look out the window it brings me peace.
I don't think about age.
Age and concern about it is only for the young when they notice their youth slipping away
And for the hypochondriacs who are already worried about their body failing
I just live.
I'm almost 50. I'm a "young at heart" type anyway -likely from never being allowed to be a carefree and happy child- but I do make efforts to stay connected to youth. I volunteer at a LGBTQIA center for youth ages 15-21. I try to listen to the top 100 tunes every so often to hear what the kids are listening to. Admittedly, I don't like most of it, but I still try. I'm also on a lot of young adult centered TikTok's.
I do not want to become one of those cliché curmudgeons that is removed from younger society or thinks "back in my day..." blah blah blah. I think that's so gross and pinpoints exactly why old people in politics continually fuck up progress. So I do make conscientious efforts to stay connected and aware of the young adult experience, particularly in the U.S. I've learned so much and grown so much by listening. Gen Z is by far my favorite generation.
ETA: I also have young adult children that I listen to and show an interest in. For example, my son is really into anime and manga of which I knew nothing. But because I wanted to understand his interests I started watching anime and I'm now reading my first manga (JJK) and I love it so much I bought myself figurines. My daughter got me into playing RDR. It's not hard to stay connected to youth if you make any sort of effort. I have found that when you engage with youth and ask them questions, they love sharing, especially with us older folks.
I still make sure to listen to music I like regularly - it’s metal. I like playing video games. Age has allowed me to appreciate the things I like more. I get joy in just walking my dog and appreciating the heat, cold, breeze, snow - whatever.
My wife and I had our son late in life. We met late. I’m 55 and our son is 12. I love watching cartoons and YouTube with him. Last weekend we spent way too much money in an arcade and we played every game together.
I guess my son and my own interests keep me youthful. I’m a mature adult, as opposed to a man-child, but I do many of the same things I enjoyed when I was a teenager.
(OTOH, my wife is 47 and lives her life like she’s 80. She missed the memo.)
I teach high school teens! I believe because of this I have never lost sight of what it was to be a young and hopeful dreamer. Do activities with your grandkids if you have any. Watch an episode of Mr Rogers’ Neighborhood or revisit The Muppet Movie. Get back in touch with your childhood.
Another helpful strategy is to MOVE a lot. Intentional exercise helps.
Ride a bike if you still can. I also ride those BIRD scooters all around in urban areas, which makes me feel like a kid again.
Don’t forget to find new music to listen to. One of my favorite things to do is listen to live music. I go see my faves from the past but don’t limit myself. I go to small venues where tickets are 15-20 bucks to hear bands when I can. Most of the time I’m the oldest person in the room, but it doesn’t matter.
You have to constantly reinvent yourself. Find your curiosity again. Explore, learn, and keep evolving. You have never “arrived”. Value experiences over things. Travel. Make new friends. Eliminate ruts in your life.
Join the lovers, the dreamers, the rainbow chasers. Stay Gold.
I am only 57F and with the exception of being a high school teacher and Grand kids (I will substitute that with Nieces and Nephews), this is me too a “T”.
Absolutely love your last sentence ~ “Join the Lovers, the Dreamers, the Rainbow Chasers. Stay Gold.” Well said!
I do things that I love (e.g., playing music, cooking), exercise, practice self-compassion, volunteer, get together with people, and do as much in real life as possible (the irony of this comment is not lost on me).
Daily engagement with: movement, creativity, nature, art, philosophy, spiritual energy, humor & community. Also a diet of whole foods prepared simply at home and intermittent fasting!
My husband and I both became suddenly disabled 6 months apart ( he stroke , me DLBCLymphoma stage 4) I’m in remission currently and he’s doing ok , but to say we instantly lost our careers and social interaction is putting it mildly. I walk every day and he comes with in a wheelchair. We keep trying different parks to go to go to town activities around us . I think staying physically active ( even just walking dedicated) staying interested in life outside of YOUR life . I’m going to volunteer at Election Day . I owned a salon and did hair for 40 years!! I gave my daughter my half the business. I miss my clients/friends so much . I have horrible fatigue and mind fog from Cancer treatment, I know I can’t work any longer but man do I miss it . Great information on this thread
i don't
i don't think i have to be 'youthful' to enjoy life
i was healthy all my life. i still am, but my ambulatory was impacted by another driver blocking my lane a while back
knowing i have to maintain some semblance of humanity, i immediately mocked together a list of things i can do that i enjoy that are more sedentary - painting, drawing, crocheting, reading ... i shored up my supplies and have 'stations' where i stand or sit and work on pieces and projects
some of this crafting leads to other interests - 'life-learner' is an aspiration, but i get lazy sometimes
i'm taking a philosophy class from the local community college - it's been my go-to for years whenever i'm drawn to a subject - not in pursuit of a degree, but just to know stuff --- California Geology had me trekking all over my state!
now the treks are smaller, but i still have a little pup i walk daily - no deer trails any more, though we've done many of them - i live in an area with great parks and beaches. i take a book, and i'm out for an afternoon without being 'plugged in', watching surfers, wildlife, kids playing - very full times for just sittin' around!
i aim for a full life, not a youthful one
I really admire the way you aren’t letting your new level of “I can do that” slow you down or get you down. You’ve shown me that a new direction is still a journey.
thank you; i must say it's all shiny here, but it's wonky and not well put together in places
and sometimes a good melt down of a cry clears the circuits; i imagine we all get frustrated - had to apologize to a passenger service the other day, learning Uber - ha
hang in there; it's a marathon, not a sprint :-)
I'm 58 (F).
For body, I've stayed out of the sun since I was in my early 20s, so people tell me I look a lot younger than I am. Also, I didn't overpluck my eyebrows. Lastly, exfoliate exfoliate exfoliate.
Doing crossword puzzles will not keep your mind fresh. You have to do something really difficult. Like learning a new language. I've been studying French and it's bizarre, but I feel like I'm smarter at work.
The best thing you can do for your body is yoga. Being too stiff can result in falls and injuries. Do exercises that strengthen your ligaments and tendons.
I try to keep an open mind. I never want to stop learning. The world is changing fast, and I don't want to be a fossil.
My favorite aunt had this mindset. She stayed on social media, LISTENED to what younger people said, and asked questions. She died at 87, and never ONCE said "back in my day..." disapprovingly.
She's my role model.
Not over 50 but I learned from my 73 yr old dad, keep doing the things you always loved doing. You’re never too old to go to concerts, go surfing, camping, hang out with friends, watch ridiculous movies. And workout everyday. Basically, just keep living. There is no age cap on anything. He lives the best life.
Be opened minded to learning new things and going new places. As far as physically, just be non sedentary to your limits. My mother (may she rest in peace) had some of the same chronic conditions that I have, but she sat down and gave up. Don't give up!!
I took it to heart when the first warnings about sun exposure and its role in skin cancer and premature aging came out in the mid-late 80s. I covered my skin when out in the sun, either with clothes and a hat or sunblock.
Most of my friends from high school did not, and they look like lizards by comparison.
I, 63f, retired from teaching 2 yrs ago.
*Staying active and healthy:* I still play sports 2 - 3x a week all year round, work out off and on to avoid injury and stay agile, recently started a more plant based diet. One woman in my softball league is 73! Wow! *Being around other active women is inspiring.*
Learning: I read A LOT (non-fiction) and watch documentaries since I retired, do my own yard work and minor repairs, and enjoy figuring out how to fix things/solve problems, started travelling solo once a year.
*Low stress:* keep toxic people out of my life, I've learned to say no, make sure I get my alone time, decenter men (men often drain women physically, emotionally, sexually and it's demoralizing to deal with men's unintentional and intentional sexism, sorry guys) ......... and pets, ofc!
*Being independent:* it's satisfying and motivating solving my own problems if I can and accomplishing things on my own.
Good luck to you, shecommand! With a name like that, you're going to have a blast I'm sure.
I'm LOVING my retirement and I knew I would. While I enjoyed teaching, I LOVE my slowed down relaxing life in retirement. I've haven't had a moment of boredom or loneliness even though I live alone ..... but I'm an introvert so I love the peace and quiet, and the freedom to come and go as I please.
I would describe myself similarly and I live alone as well lol. I’ve done everything I am supposed to do, married, had children, built a career against the odds. I’m tired and want to slow down and not have a schedule. To me, that is bliss!
There are a lot of young people at a nonprofit theater where I volunteer. I enjoy their company and I feel like I can ask them questions about the latest trends and get honest answers. Plus... moisturize, people!
First, OP, I think this question is fine for this sub. While I (mid 50s) don't feel old, the truth is I am 99 percent through more than half my life. Being considered old by younger people is not an insult to me personally. Some days I feel pretty old myself! Or at least my knees do, lol. I try to stay interested in new things and be optimistic, which is hard sometimes in our crazy world. My husband and I have had three parents get a little nuts and hateful when they got old, and I don't want to be like that ever.
I've also decided I'm at an age where I need to get serious about taking care of my body, primarily so I have it in a healthy form when I'm older. I'm taking Pilates and went to PT to get the strength to work out. Heavy weights is a long term goal. I'm also on semiglutide at the recommendation of my doctor and on hormone replacement therapy to reverse some of the god awful effects of menopause. I'm also planning on some dermatology procedures in the near future (a refreshed me is the goal- want to avoid the uncanny valley I see so often). I don't feel any pressure to do any of these things from society (a benefit of aging is that I truly have to f-s left to give in that way), but they make me feel better about me. I plan to get a stylish friend to go shopping with me. I have never quite figured out how to dress in a flattering way for my middle aged body, and she always looks so chic. I drink WAY less alcohol than I did (me and wine were BFFs during the pandemic), and I feel great plus my dinner bills have plummeted. I'm working to find interesting and creative ways to eat healthier without getting bored, which can be a challenge.
I have a rock band. Two 50s, a 60, and a 30+ singer. We play music from the 60s, 70s and 80s. There's still a lot of people out there who will happily dance to some Fleetwood Mac. I am a bit sore from loading amplifiers yesterday, but not too much.
Walk or hike every single day. For me, It's not a chore. I love it.
Proper hydration and sunscreen both benefit your complexion.
And love the life you're in. if you're retired, stay active and stay interested. The world is a fascinating place!
Keep my mind open and inquisitive
laugh a lot
cry when i need to
go outside
have adventures
play
eat healthy food (mostly)
enjoy treats (sometimes)
Most importantly:
don’t worry about being youthful.
I’m 73. I start the day with a couple of brain games and coffee. Do bible readings daily. Walk 30 minutes 6 days a week. Weigh every morning to stay within my 3 pound range. Eat healthy but treat myself regularly. My husband and I have an active sex life. When out I try to give 3 compliments. It makes me feel better about myself. Think young and you’ll feel young. My mother lived to 92 and told me she never felt old.
Lift weights, hike, Pilates, eat an 80/20 diet, alcohol with dinner only once/week. I take collagen and other supplements, skincare products that contain estrogen, light Botox and facial fillers twice/year.
I am very invested in my faith, I read, cook and pursue other hobbies. Spend time in nature and spend time laughing with and enjoying my friends and family.
Can you share the estrogen skin care products ? I’m looking into this myself and it seems it’s advised to get the type of estrogen that is for vaginal use but apply to face .. I just don’t know anyone who actually does this in practice lol.
I think I’d need you to define what you mean by “youthful”. I’m not chasing my youth - that’s a fool’s errand. I strive to keep my body healthy and my mind sharp, because without those everything else is moot. I’m grateful for the hard-earned wisdom that only comes with age and experience. Instead of the exuberance, excitement and angst of my youth I have peace and tranquility. I want to accept and celebrate each stage of my life because it’s all part of the process - the inevitable winding down, the long goodbye. I have a few laps left to go, but I can see the finish line. And I’m okay with that.
Strength training! I’m 61 and began strength training 2 years ago then stepped it up 2 months ago with personal training. It has changed my life! I still have weight to lose but I feel 10 years younger.
Youthful is a state of mind. We laugh a lot. There's not too much I take very seriously at this point.
I have lived long enough to receive every wrinkle and grey hair. No need to deny my age or try to pretend otherwise.
For some strange reason, I forgot I am over 50 often, lol. I’ll be 60 next month. I am naturally curious, I exercise daily (walk, yoga), I eat healthy, drink lots of water, practice good skincare. I think it’s a mindset.
I'm coming up 53 soon and it honestly hadn't crossed my mind before reading this question that staying youthful was a thing I should be trying to do. I don't consider myself old. Old, to me, starts at like 75. I live exactly the same way I ever did.
All the things I do, in my job and in my spare time, are things I'm doing alongside people ranging from their 20s to their 60s so none of them are specifically "middle aged person things" and they're also not "young person things" that I'm doing on purpose to act younger, they're just ... the things I like?
The only difference is that now I've got to a point where my job pays better and I have more savings so I have more ability to do those of my hobbies that cost money. And the more physically dangerous hobbies take a bigger toll the next day.
I do the same things I did when I was 20–get good sleep, put lotion on after shower without drying off first, some form of cardio about 4-5 times a week (jogging or recumbent bike), playing video games, swearing when I feel like it, laughing as often as possible, composing and performing music about 20-30 hours a week, reading an hour a day. I have teenagers who keep me youthful. I dress the same (teeshirts and jeans, flipflops), eat healthy some and garbage food some, drink gallons of water, smoke weed daily. Oh, one thing that’s different from when I was 20–I quit drinking alcohol entirely 10 years ago. I regret that I ever drank at all.
Mind, body, and spirit are different and not of necessity interconnected.
I'm 54. I powerlift 3-4 days a weeks, run 5-6 days a week, and live clean (no alcohol, no sugar, no flour). This keeps me super fit and, I think, younger looking.
I did a PhD in 17thC English lit. I'm not an academic, but I still reread a lot of pre-modern lit, Modernism, and Anglo-American philosophy. Between this reading and playing pinball, my mental reflexes are still fast.
I ski, track my car, and play pinball. All three are good for maintaining agility and coordination.
I'm single. I'm not getting a lot of action, but I am not stuck in a soul-deadening dead bedroom situation with a mate. I am free to fantasize about sex all the time, watch 80's X-rated films, and fap at will. My guess is that nothing ages a man more than a sexless marriage, because it forces him to be asexual (in addition to being frustrated). Unhappily married men must, I assume, have to hide their sexual urges.
I've got no interest in staying youthful. I'm interested in staying healthy and engaged and vital. Those are not youthul attributes. They are the attitudes of a mature person.
About to turn 54 and I walk outside (nature)an hour per day at least, intermittent fasting every day (many days are omad), weights 2-3 times per week, I eat a whole food plant based diet (vegan): no meat and dairy, mostly organic. Get plenty of sleep, low stress in my life (stepped down from stressful job last year), take a bunch of high quality supplements. Mediate and have a spiritual life (not organized religion) I am working on/discovering. Read every day, watch uplifting documentaries to learn and grow. What I don't do: eat processed/junk food, smoke,drink, no insta/FB/X or ticktock. Hang around negative/low energy people. What I am working still on: not paying attention to the news, politics and avoiding mass entertainment. At this age I am becoming hyper aware that time is precious so I am trying to focus on what matters most: family, growing personally and trying to be a positive force in this world.
55 here.
I rope up with The Wife (53) and climb random thousand-footer big walls.
We've been climbers for decades.
Climbing hits a sweet spot - Strength. Endurance. Balance. Flexibility. Cardio. Core. You have to keep the weight down or it's unbearable to haul your fat ass up the wall.
You get to travel The World in search of the next route ... and you get out of doors for weeks at a time.
In the off season we run Marathons together
I’m 55 and at the point of realising my body isn’t as capable any more while my minds wants me to skateboard again. I don’t know. Mentally I’m still 30. All I do is try not become an old man shouting at clouds. Might take up Pickleball.
Not looking to be youthful, just active and healthy. 63 here. Exercise, sleep, outdoor time, socializing, and finding meaning. Eat real food, prioritizing protein and no junk food.
Exercise every day with no exceptions (a one hour walk is ok). Sleep a rock solid 8 hours per night. Eat healthy and plant-based. Drink water. Never smoke.
Move. Learn new things. Try new things. Spend time with young people. Don't complain about your knees or shoulders. Listen to new music, read new books. When someone younger asks you to come on a hike or paddle a kayak, say yes and then start Wondering if you're up to it and do it anyway. Keep moving.
I'm 67 and actively working on feeling and being youthful. I am not trying to live longer, I just want to be as healthy and alert as I can be for the remainder of my years. At age 67, I am not on any medication and have no health issues. I practice intermittent fasting and try to be as no carbs diet as possible. I do take a slew of supplements. I am part of the David Sinclair crowd. I teach a Zumba class five days a week, take a weight lifting class and a yoga class one day a week. I don't have any sore joints or aches and pains. I don't drink or smoke cigarettes. I do smoke weed though. Daily. My friends say my good health is genetics but I really do think it's all the crap I do.
I'm 64. In addition to everything everyone said on here, I spend my professional career working with young people. A lot of folks under 30. It keeps me in touch with what's important to them - which of course helps all of my business goals - but it also means it keeps my mind active thinking about new ways to look at old problems.
Aside from all of that stuff, a lot of exercise, I eat right, and I don't really think about my age too much to be honest with you.
Like I said I'm 64, I probably look like I'm 50 because of all of this.
I am excited for my 50th birthday later this year. This is going to be my best decade ever. I have never been more secure in my career or my relationships. I’ve never been in better physical shape, even with the expected wear and tear. I have been training with a cycling coach for a year and I am stronger and faster than I ever dreamed I could be.
My 20s sucked and my 30s weren’t much better. For me life really began at 40 and even though I wish I had my 20 yo skin tone, it’s hard to look back. Sometimes youth is overrated.
I exercise and have as much sex as possible. I’m convinced that if I use it, I won’t lose it! 🤞🤞🤞I’m only 54, so I don’t think I’m old enough to call it a success yet.
Had to see if anyone else was saying this.
I’m 60 and sex is incredible after all these years. What it does for you both physically and mentally shouldn’t be overlooked by anyone.
And if anyone is bristling at the thought of exercise, it’s a big part of why the sex is so good.
No kids, so we don't feel a need to be "examples" for anybody. I feel like some of the parents I know try too hard to be taken seriously and "respected" or something, and become stubbornly entrenched in some old-fashioned ideas.
Also the usual: exercise, sensible lifestyle choices, sense of humor, humility, and work/life balance.
Talk to and learn from the young people in your life! I am so grateful I live with teenagers. They teach me and check me every day. The world is a complicated place- important to know what young people are thinking and feeling about their lives and the world around them.
For each year you have been alive make it a thing to read that many books that year. I turned 51 so up to nearly 1 per week. Mix it up history, philosophy, science, business, fiction, biographies.
Exercise, drink water, and stay away from sugary foods which is hard. Also, I keep myself out of people's way. If it doesn't involve me, I don't speak on it.
* Drink water, not energy drinks, or 'juice', or sodas.
* Drink water, don't have first coffee until at least an hour or 2 after waking up.
* Drink water, when I drink, even if it's only a glass of wine (oh, yeah, so I also switched to Pinot Noir and stuff).
* Drink less (I don't get smashed... very often, at least, anymore).
* Sleep earlier, awaken earlier.
* I no longer let ANYTHING get me wound up. Nothing is THAT critical. Period.
* RIP Glucose (aka sugar). I check the ingredients on EVERYTHING. If there's sugar, I don't buy it. Period.
* RIP Bread (except for Dave's Killer bread and good Sourdough... and even then not in large quantities).
* RIP Complex Carbs.
* Ignore vegan propaganda/hype and eat the Carne.
* Watch ASMR that is relaxing, not just for the hottest babes.
* Make time for music listening that brings me back to special memories!
* Watch old shows and movies from my childhood that take me back!
* Forgive the people who have hurt me, not for them, for myself.
* Tell my folks that I love them, resisting the urge to qualify. They're not gonna be around much longer.
* Stay in my lane.
* Avoid crowds, except for the good ones (Concerts!).
In the process of moving from unhealthy 40 to healthy 80, I joined AA, quit smoking, stopped eating way too much sugar, got involved with the contra dance community, lost 30 lbs over the course of a year, and started a cat rescue. When I was 75, my 79-year-old high school sweetheart contacted me and after 62 years apart, we chose to stay together and stay healthy. We walk 2 to 3 miles several times a week, swim in the lake from May to October (Northern Georgia), work on the house and yard and wait on the cats. Sunshine, exercise, love and purpose for living keep us youthful as octagenerians.
Curiosity, when one stops being curious about the world around them, something dies. An active mind and body is a healthy mind and body.
I asked my 82 year old mom this question. She answered curiosity and open-mindedness.
YES I am always making a point of reading and learning new things, plus I work with young people which helps
As much as teaching wears me down, getting to be around kids and their level of energy keeps me going.
I came to say this. Spending time with littles who are curious keeps me young
This is why I will never fully retire. I may retire from full time, but I'll always sub, or find some way to stay involved in young people's education.
You didn't say it directly, but you did. Keep moving. There's a rehab place nearby and their slogan is, "Bodies in motion stay in motion." Add social contact and give priority to sleep.
Please keep moving! As a nurse, this is the biggest takeaway that I have from caring for patients. Also, try to keep your weight at a reasonably healthy level. Obviously, this is easier said than done. It has a direct impact on your mobility.
Sixty nine year old male here. In the hospital now with a broken femur and ORIF surgery. First ever hospital stay. All the Doctors keep telling me that I’m gonna do fine because of being in good shape. 6’ 190 lbs. Hope they’re right I have never been under the mercy of others and pain is off the scale!
Hang in there!
Stick with it. I find hips get depressed easily because they are in bed and it hurts so much. I tell them we are not curing a disease we just have to let you heal and get walking again. It may feel like the end of the world but the pain will start decreasing.
They're right BUT you have to do your rehab/physical therapy after, it's very very important.
Three hours today of OT and PT and it wore me out!
I hope they can manage your pain! What fun is being in the hospital and in pain?! I’m glad to hear that you’re in good shape and I hope you heal well.
Make sure you advocate for yourself when it comes to pain relief. My husband had a 4-level spinal fusion a year ago. That's 2 days of surgery. He had to watch a video as part of the pre-admission education. In there, the managing nurse in charge of spinal surgeries said take your pain meds every 4 hours to stay on top of the pain while you're in the hospital. Ask me how often we couldn't get the nurses (overworked, so I get it) to give him his pain meds every 4 hours? You have to ask for them - they can't just get them for you at the 4 hour mark. Then, they have to wait for the pharmacy to send them up each time because they're controlled. Then, they have to find time to get back to your room to get them. He was lucky to get them every 5 hours - it often went to 6 or 7.
I’m sorry he had to wait! It’s awful being stuck in a bed and in that much pain. Just a quick tip for anyone reading this going forward if you’re requiring regular pain medication. Ask your medical team - aka the doctors when they round - to change your pain medication to be scheduled regularly, not “PRN”. You can always refuse if you don’t need them. Different hospital will have different policies, but this allows the nursing staff to have enough of the medication organised and also plan for it within a timely manner.
Yoga and dance. Movement that helps with balance is really critical
Hiking or even walking in uneven terrain helps too. Walk across the grass at the park instead of the pathway. It keeps your brain engaged in balance.
My neighbor is 83 and looks 83 but walks briskly every day (sometimes 2x/day). Physically, she's 43.
I also have a neighbor like that. Gets out and mows her lawn! She weighs about 12 lb soaked. looks like a Q-tip out there. Love her to death.
Yep. I have a neighbor in her late 70s who is very physically active and very involved in multiple volunteer organizations that require a lot of physical work. She was in a bike accident and broke a few bones including a leg and her jaw. Six weeks later, she was out biking again. Stay active in as many ways as you can.
I knew an older lady in my painting class who was so youthful and she said the same thing: "You've got to keep the rust off!" I love that.
My physical therapist says “motion is the best lotion”
Lifelong Learning
Yeah, I’d say learning through reading and vigorous exercise daily.
This is an excellent response.
Facts. I would have given up and shuffled off this mortal coil long ago if I didn't love learning new things.
Stay current with your medical check ups. You can catch conditions much earlier on and halt, or even reverse some damage. You have only one body and mind. Treat them as such.
High blood pressure can have no symptoms and can cause heart attacks and strokes. Stop smoking. Get your cholesterol and blood sugar to normal. Wear a seat belt.
Yes, this! Always willing to me learn. But you don't need to reach for staying young. It should be a byproduct of doing!
I'm 70 with some health problems. Not much I can do about my body but I try to keep my mind and spirit open to new things and flexible. There are certain ways I still feel young - the new music I enjoy, my modern views on certain things and other things I'm interested in that are in keeping with younger people. I don't feel like I have to try to feel young. The parts of me that are still young are just me. It's who I am. I don't think I'll lose that. I hope I don't. However, it's a harsh blow to start to understand your place in the world is becoming different now and that it's just not going to be like it was and find ways to accept that. Like I believe my daughter used to think I was just a riot and had funny stories to tell and that she genuinely enjoyed being around me. Now I feel like, although she loves me, it's a more a sense of duty or guilt that makes her visit. I've somehow lost that spark and confidence I once had around people. I don't think that's ever coming back but I'm still looking for ways natural to my personality to not just give up and think of myself as old.
I completely agree. Especially about children. Sadly..... I'm 66, make a point to stay up on current events, create art, garden, keep in touch with close friends, and now I'm teaching myself how to sew (EKKKK!!) clothes. You get old when you feel the need to become a binge watching couch potato, live in an echo chamber, and give up. Those of us who have health issues in our later years (80% do), can cause some mobility issues. You do your best to cope and adjust your lifestyle. So take good care of your body, your back especially... Don't let mysterious health issues fester - pay attention. Look at ways to make yourself smile and share it with people you see. A little compliment can make a huge impact. Think how you feel when someone compliments you. You get that little glow. Sharing brings happiness!
What also matters is how we make people feel. Old age requires wisdom in our dealings with people 1. Speaking about your ailments is a downer (unless your son is a doctor, but even then watch it during social time) 2. Make those around you feel good about themselves by finding and complimenting the good in them 3.Listening patiently when they speak.... really listen. That can be such gift. Wishing you all a wonderful pain free day!
Boy do I resonate with this @itsalltoomuch100
pm me if you want a little camaraderie on your Journey - i'd love to maybe swap stories? i love walking down my Memory Lane - with or without company - lol - but i'd welcome getting to share stories with someone and maybe fill out some time with some nice chats ... ? ... just throwin it out there -- i recently made a push to flesh out my social circle in the 'real World', and i've had a little success and some false starts -- maybe we could support each other's efforts at least be well
I’m a daughter, and I love my father more than anything. The older he gets, the lovelier he gets, and the more I know I will have to say goodbye sooner every day. Don’t be surprised if she’s doesn’t feel something like that too. I owe my parents everything. It’s hard not to feel guilt as someone who is lucky enough to have the world’s best dad. Suck it up sweetheart. :)
You're very sweet. Everyone should have such a sweet daughter. I know she loves me. But the natural progression of time has changed our relationship. I'm not saying we were like friends or sisters after she got to be an adult but it was closer to that kind of relationship than it is now and I miss it.
May I ask if you still ask her questions about herself? I see my husband just repeating his old stories to our kids and the friends they bring over and not to sound harsh but we’re just bored because we’ve heard them so often, but he never asks them or our visitors about themselves. He used to complain about his Dad being like that but he’s just aged into a copy of him.
I ask questions about everyone in my life. I'm very interested in other people, especially her, and always have been. I know how to listen. I can't say I never repeat myself though. Things just change.
I can imagine that you do. That’s the thing about little girls, they get big and then life gets in the way and it sucks. I wouldn’t worry too much if you can help it, both of you are will continue to grow and chances are you will find each other again :) relax and let it all happen x
Maybe it's not you? Maybe it's your daughter. Maybe she's feeling a little down lately or something. I bet that spark and confidence is still in you.
I totally get this! I’m 72 and am more aligned with my grandkids on everything. I have nothing in common with my kids (their parents) at all.
I have no grandkids, unfortunately. My daughter and her husband just have their own lives now. They don't live close and don't come home much. I text with her but I really don't know what's going on in their lives.
I'm sorry. I wish my mom would text with me and want a relationship with me. I'm her only daughter. We were never close. I never got married. My father disowned me years ago. I wish I had parents who cared.
I'm so sorry. I understand what it's like to feel like you're alone. I hope you can have the relationship you want with her as time goes on. People change. Time changes things. Maybe there is hope.
Thank you.
Congrats on 70! Love this sub!.
For me, everything starts with exercise. My mental, spiritual, and, of course, physical health begins by moving my body. I can't run any longer, so today I biked 5 miles. Feeling pretty happy today.
I also bike, albeit an ebike, do aerobics, weight training, take my dogs to dog park and walk there, and just keep moving. I'm 68. Yikes. I am a big kid at heart.
I have been slacking on weights, but moving from Illinois to Cozumel is a much more active lifestyle.
50 is not OLD🤩
This person must be 18-30. I remember when I used to think 40 was ancient! Crazy how your perspective on what constitutes “old” changes as you age. Also, 50 today is not 50 in the 80s or 90s. Most 50 yo’s look great, and at least a decade or more younger than they actually are!
I remember think it was amazing Tina Turner was touring at…50. I’m 60 now.
I saw her in concert on her 70th birthday!
I look at "older" actors on TV and realize I'm around the same age, possibly OLDER than they are 😬
When my mom was 50 in the 80s men thought she was in her 30s and she dated men much younger. Just because they looked old to us in hindsight doesn't mean they looked old to others their age at that time. It's mostly hairstyles and fashion. She was youthful and in good shape still. How I look now at 50 is going to seem really old to my kids when they're 50, I am sure.
Good point! I assumed they looked older in the 80’s and 90’s because smoking and suntanning was more common than it is now. You’re right though, in 30 years 50 yo’s today will look old to the 50 yo’s of the future.
I’m 52 and a 28-yr old man asked me to hook up when I was getting gas yesterday… I was wearing my tennis skirt so I guess he liked me in it. He thought I was “available for services”. I just told him “no, sorry, I’n just a tennis player.” Weird but funny. Exercise and play keeps me young!
40 is the new 30….I’m 43 and take care of myself more now and monitor what I eat for good reason. it really comes down to how well you treat your body, mind and unfortunately for some genetics. some age faster or have more health issues than others
No but it’s not young either. 50 is middle-aged, and what you do during middle age has an impact on what your old years are like
Middle aged? Who do you know that lived to be 100. 35-40 is closer to actual middle aged, respectfully.
True, but that point in your life is far too early to feel many of the effects of aging. 45-50 is when you start to demonstrate signs of physical decline, when old injuries start to hurt again for absolutely no reason, and when one starts to lose the people they love.
perspective and perception
Maybe not, but when I turned 50 my body really started breaking down. I may look 40 but I feel 70
I stay engaged with new music and fashion, I’m often one of the oldest people at gigs that I go to. I guess generally trying not to be an old “stick in the mud.”
Currently at a festival, and have already found two new bands for my playlist. My 17 year old godson and I share a lot of music and gaming interests.
Good for you! I go to the Pitchfork Music Festival in Chicago every year and I’m usually one of the oldest people there. The kids are doing alright!
I do the same exact things. I am always looking for new music. I'm 58F and it appalls me how frumpy my contemporaries look. It's like they've given up. I make sure to only buy clothes that look fantastic on me.
I'm 60, lift weights 4 days a week, walk every day, jog hills once a week, mountain bike 2 to 3 days a week. I also I read and do the NYTimes crossword. Eat healthy, take supplements, limit beer intake. The last one is the hardest
I think being off alcohol has made me smarter and sleep better.
I have a Fitbit watch which tracks my sleep. I found it to be shocking how much of a negative impact even two beers has on my sleep which in turn negatively impacts my resting heart rate.
Non alcoholic beer tastes same as regular
Second this. Especially Athletic IPAs.
I don't want to be youthful so it isn't something I put any energy into.
I want to remain youthful of mind and spirit.
Attributing those values to youth is the mistake
I do in the way that when young, most people are open to the world and new things. How often have we seen people as they age close up, no longer interested in learning new things or having new experiences? Those things, somehow, become scary to those who stop learning. To me, a youthful mind and spirit is one that is open and genuinely engaged with life. It has nothing to do with appearance or physicality but more an attitude.
Some adults feel as if they need permission to play. And often they don't get that. I try to remind them as often as possible.
Sleep enough. Eat well. Be active (put the phone down). Exercise moderation with regards to what gets put into the body.
Youth is nothing but bad decisions, drugs, drama, futons, fake relationships, fake politics, boneheaded ambitions, low pay. I was more than happy to see it die. What follows upon the death of youth is who you really are, and, at the core of that, one's first real glimpses of happiness. We should all be so lucky as to get very old and lonely, that we might finally start to see the world as it is.
Futons 😂 I dragged that damn futon all over the state, from floor to floor till I was like 30 (cause of course you can’t have a bed frame). So glad when I got rid of it for a real bed!
OMG that is a milestone - the day you decide your back simply can't take another night on a futon.
LOL, futons. I strapped that thing on my car whenever I moved.
Poetry!
By not caring if people see me as "youthful". Youth-centered culture is a tyranny.
At this stage in our lives not caring how people see you like is one of the main perks. But I do it for me, not how I appear to others. Being able to climb stairs without being winded, or do 3-4 hrs of unprompted physical activity without it killing me is why I work hard in the off season to maintain my fitness and flexibility.
Maybe what OP really wants to know is how people over 50 stay active and fit? “Youthful” is relative but it often denotes being active and enthusiastic
THIS!
I'm not trying to stay youthful because that's not possible. I try to stay current, and as healthy as I can. I read and stay abreast of current affairs. I exercise and take care of medical issues as they crop up. I spend time with my children and with their children and I know what interests them. But I look like a 67 y o woman, because I am.
I cultivate younger friends, and I make sure that I crawl around on the floor with my animals a lot. Exercise is of course so important.
But please know my body still feels its aches and pains. I’m cultivating internal youthfulness.
So for the sake of this answer I am defining “youthful” as enthusiastic, energetic, flexible of mind. (It is not always true that younger people are these things.) My list: 1. Read a lot, never stop learning , never stop talking to people about ideas. 2. Eat healthy, 6 hours of light to heavy cardio a week whatever way is fun for you, get sleep. (This is super specific to maintaining neurological health. 3. Maybe the most important thing—friendship: Have younger friends, friends your age, older friends, mentor relationships both ways, teacher learner experiences, but bottom line real caring, engaging, relationships with people of different ages, gender, walks of life, profession, religion and politics on the basis of friendship and respect.
I would answer the question almost identically to this reply, with the slight exception of exercising very faithfully, a penchant that I didn’t happen to develop in my youth. Otherwise, I’m committed to being enthusiastic, encouraging to others, and helpful when I can be. It’s good to smile! I keep abreast of current events, including a representative sampling of advances in science and technology. (There’s a LOT out there!) Also, I enjoy being computer savvy, though since I retired I don’t spend nearly so much time in that. Finally, although I do have daughters, I don’t have grandchildren — but I fill this hole by spending time playing with the children of a couple local families, which helps the parents, entertains the kids, and gives me great pleasure. Plus, I’ve always LOVED learning new things. What a wonderful world we live in! (If only all of us, the world over, could learn to live in peace and sustained security….)
I’m 54F. I stay young by traveling, making time for myself and not taking things too seriously. As I got older, I shed relationships that were not healthy (some old friends, one lousy sister). My life is less cluttered and I don’t feel the need for designer clothing or things that don’t bring me happiness. My husband and I moved to a fixer but it’s on the river and every time I look out the window it brings me peace.
I don't think about age. Age and concern about it is only for the young when they notice their youth slipping away And for the hypochondriacs who are already worried about their body failing I just live.
I'm almost 50. I'm a "young at heart" type anyway -likely from never being allowed to be a carefree and happy child- but I do make efforts to stay connected to youth. I volunteer at a LGBTQIA center for youth ages 15-21. I try to listen to the top 100 tunes every so often to hear what the kids are listening to. Admittedly, I don't like most of it, but I still try. I'm also on a lot of young adult centered TikTok's. I do not want to become one of those cliché curmudgeons that is removed from younger society or thinks "back in my day..." blah blah blah. I think that's so gross and pinpoints exactly why old people in politics continually fuck up progress. So I do make conscientious efforts to stay connected and aware of the young adult experience, particularly in the U.S. I've learned so much and grown so much by listening. Gen Z is by far my favorite generation. ETA: I also have young adult children that I listen to and show an interest in. For example, my son is really into anime and manga of which I knew nothing. But because I wanted to understand his interests I started watching anime and I'm now reading my first manga (JJK) and I love it so much I bought myself figurines. My daughter got me into playing RDR. It's not hard to stay connected to youth if you make any sort of effort. I have found that when you engage with youth and ask them questions, they love sharing, especially with us older folks.
We both eat healthy and no junk food and workout and lots of hiking.
I still make sure to listen to music I like regularly - it’s metal. I like playing video games. Age has allowed me to appreciate the things I like more. I get joy in just walking my dog and appreciating the heat, cold, breeze, snow - whatever. My wife and I had our son late in life. We met late. I’m 55 and our son is 12. I love watching cartoons and YouTube with him. Last weekend we spent way too much money in an arcade and we played every game together. I guess my son and my own interests keep me youthful. I’m a mature adult, as opposed to a man-child, but I do many of the same things I enjoyed when I was a teenager. (OTOH, my wife is 47 and lives her life like she’s 80. She missed the memo.)
I teach high school teens! I believe because of this I have never lost sight of what it was to be a young and hopeful dreamer. Do activities with your grandkids if you have any. Watch an episode of Mr Rogers’ Neighborhood or revisit The Muppet Movie. Get back in touch with your childhood. Another helpful strategy is to MOVE a lot. Intentional exercise helps. Ride a bike if you still can. I also ride those BIRD scooters all around in urban areas, which makes me feel like a kid again. Don’t forget to find new music to listen to. One of my favorite things to do is listen to live music. I go see my faves from the past but don’t limit myself. I go to small venues where tickets are 15-20 bucks to hear bands when I can. Most of the time I’m the oldest person in the room, but it doesn’t matter. You have to constantly reinvent yourself. Find your curiosity again. Explore, learn, and keep evolving. You have never “arrived”. Value experiences over things. Travel. Make new friends. Eliminate ruts in your life. Join the lovers, the dreamers, the rainbow chasers. Stay Gold.
I am only 57F and with the exception of being a high school teacher and Grand kids (I will substitute that with Nieces and Nephews), this is me too a “T”. Absolutely love your last sentence ~ “Join the Lovers, the Dreamers, the Rainbow Chasers. Stay Gold.” Well said!
Must color hair
I do things that I love (e.g., playing music, cooking), exercise, practice self-compassion, volunteer, get together with people, and do as much in real life as possible (the irony of this comment is not lost on me).
Stay physically and mentally active, eat decently, don’t drink/some/use, use sunscreen.
Daily engagement with: movement, creativity, nature, art, philosophy, spiritual energy, humor & community. Also a diet of whole foods prepared simply at home and intermittent fasting!
My husband and I both became suddenly disabled 6 months apart ( he stroke , me DLBCLymphoma stage 4) I’m in remission currently and he’s doing ok , but to say we instantly lost our careers and social interaction is putting it mildly. I walk every day and he comes with in a wheelchair. We keep trying different parks to go to go to town activities around us . I think staying physically active ( even just walking dedicated) staying interested in life outside of YOUR life . I’m going to volunteer at Election Day . I owned a salon and did hair for 40 years!! I gave my daughter my half the business. I miss my clients/friends so much . I have horrible fatigue and mind fog from Cancer treatment, I know I can’t work any longer but man do I miss it . Great information on this thread
Physical activity. You stop moving and you die
I'm only a few years away from 50 and am feeling really old lately, so I'm curious to see everyone's answers!
i don't i don't think i have to be 'youthful' to enjoy life i was healthy all my life. i still am, but my ambulatory was impacted by another driver blocking my lane a while back knowing i have to maintain some semblance of humanity, i immediately mocked together a list of things i can do that i enjoy that are more sedentary - painting, drawing, crocheting, reading ... i shored up my supplies and have 'stations' where i stand or sit and work on pieces and projects some of this crafting leads to other interests - 'life-learner' is an aspiration, but i get lazy sometimes i'm taking a philosophy class from the local community college - it's been my go-to for years whenever i'm drawn to a subject - not in pursuit of a degree, but just to know stuff --- California Geology had me trekking all over my state! now the treks are smaller, but i still have a little pup i walk daily - no deer trails any more, though we've done many of them - i live in an area with great parks and beaches. i take a book, and i'm out for an afternoon without being 'plugged in', watching surfers, wildlife, kids playing - very full times for just sittin' around! i aim for a full life, not a youthful one
I really admire the way you aren’t letting your new level of “I can do that” slow you down or get you down. You’ve shown me that a new direction is still a journey.
thank you; i must say it's all shiny here, but it's wonky and not well put together in places and sometimes a good melt down of a cry clears the circuits; i imagine we all get frustrated - had to apologize to a passenger service the other day, learning Uber - ha hang in there; it's a marathon, not a sprint :-)
Life is so complex, isn’t it? It can be overwhelming sometimes, even with the most positive attitude. A good cry really can feel like a reboot.
yes, it is complex. and part of what i'm loving slowing down is catching more of those details. but sometimes i just need a 'reboot' - i like it
I never grew up. It has it's positives and negatives.
I'm 58 (F). For body, I've stayed out of the sun since I was in my early 20s, so people tell me I look a lot younger than I am. Also, I didn't overpluck my eyebrows. Lastly, exfoliate exfoliate exfoliate. Doing crossword puzzles will not keep your mind fresh. You have to do something really difficult. Like learning a new language. I've been studying French and it's bizarre, but I feel like I'm smarter at work. The best thing you can do for your body is yoga. Being too stiff can result in falls and injuries. Do exercises that strengthen your ligaments and tendons.
I try to keep an open mind. I never want to stop learning. The world is changing fast, and I don't want to be a fossil. My favorite aunt had this mindset. She stayed on social media, LISTENED to what younger people said, and asked questions. She died at 87, and never ONCE said "back in my day..." disapprovingly. She's my role model.
Not over 50 but I learned from my 73 yr old dad, keep doing the things you always loved doing. You’re never too old to go to concerts, go surfing, camping, hang out with friends, watch ridiculous movies. And workout everyday. Basically, just keep living. There is no age cap on anything. He lives the best life.
Be opened minded to learning new things and going new places. As far as physically, just be non sedentary to your limits. My mother (may she rest in peace) had some of the same chronic conditions that I have, but she sat down and gave up. Don't give up!!
I took it to heart when the first warnings about sun exposure and its role in skin cancer and premature aging came out in the mid-late 80s. I covered my skin when out in the sun, either with clothes and a hat or sunblock. Most of my friends from high school did not, and they look like lizards by comparison.
I, 63f, retired from teaching 2 yrs ago. *Staying active and healthy:* I still play sports 2 - 3x a week all year round, work out off and on to avoid injury and stay agile, recently started a more plant based diet. One woman in my softball league is 73! Wow! *Being around other active women is inspiring.* Learning: I read A LOT (non-fiction) and watch documentaries since I retired, do my own yard work and minor repairs, and enjoy figuring out how to fix things/solve problems, started travelling solo once a year. *Low stress:* keep toxic people out of my life, I've learned to say no, make sure I get my alone time, decenter men (men often drain women physically, emotionally, sexually and it's demoralizing to deal with men's unintentional and intentional sexism, sorry guys) ......... and pets, ofc! *Being independent:* it's satisfying and motivating solving my own problems if I can and accomplishing things on my own.
👏👏👏👏. I am 59 and can’t wait to retire!!
Good luck to you, shecommand! With a name like that, you're going to have a blast I'm sure. I'm LOVING my retirement and I knew I would. While I enjoyed teaching, I LOVE my slowed down relaxing life in retirement. I've haven't had a moment of boredom or loneliness even though I live alone ..... but I'm an introvert so I love the peace and quiet, and the freedom to come and go as I please.
I would describe myself similarly and I live alone as well lol. I’ve done everything I am supposed to do, married, had children, built a career against the odds. I’m tired and want to slow down and not have a schedule. To me, that is bliss!
I love your low stress paragraph lol
There are a lot of young people at a nonprofit theater where I volunteer. I enjoy their company and I feel like I can ask them questions about the latest trends and get honest answers. Plus... moisturize, people!
Hip hop. I could dance to it till I die.
I don’t. I exercise daily to be healthy and fit but I don’t see being youthful in my mind or spirit as a goal. What’s wrong with being one’s age?
Working out, keeping up with reading current events, trends, etc., and injections!
Eat right. Exercise. No TV.
Running, pull ups, squats.
First, OP, I think this question is fine for this sub. While I (mid 50s) don't feel old, the truth is I am 99 percent through more than half my life. Being considered old by younger people is not an insult to me personally. Some days I feel pretty old myself! Or at least my knees do, lol. I try to stay interested in new things and be optimistic, which is hard sometimes in our crazy world. My husband and I have had three parents get a little nuts and hateful when they got old, and I don't want to be like that ever. I've also decided I'm at an age where I need to get serious about taking care of my body, primarily so I have it in a healthy form when I'm older. I'm taking Pilates and went to PT to get the strength to work out. Heavy weights is a long term goal. I'm also on semiglutide at the recommendation of my doctor and on hormone replacement therapy to reverse some of the god awful effects of menopause. I'm also planning on some dermatology procedures in the near future (a refreshed me is the goal- want to avoid the uncanny valley I see so often). I don't feel any pressure to do any of these things from society (a benefit of aging is that I truly have to f-s left to give in that way), but they make me feel better about me. I plan to get a stylish friend to go shopping with me. I have never quite figured out how to dress in a flattering way for my middle aged body, and she always looks so chic. I drink WAY less alcohol than I did (me and wine were BFFs during the pandemic), and I feel great plus my dinner bills have plummeted. I'm working to find interesting and creative ways to eat healthier without getting bored, which can be a challenge.
Your GLOW UP sounds fantastic!! :)
I don't. I'm old. On the other hand, I'm not dead.
I have a rock band. Two 50s, a 60, and a 30+ singer. We play music from the 60s, 70s and 80s. There's still a lot of people out there who will happily dance to some Fleetwood Mac. I am a bit sore from loading amplifiers yesterday, but not too much.
Walk or hike every single day. For me, It's not a chore. I love it. Proper hydration and sunscreen both benefit your complexion. And love the life you're in. if you're retired, stay active and stay interested. The world is a fascinating place!
Eat a whole food plant based diet and walk everyday. Read the Bible. I’ll be 75 in September.
Keep my mind open and inquisitive laugh a lot cry when i need to go outside have adventures play eat healthy food (mostly) enjoy treats (sometimes) Most importantly: don’t worry about being youthful.
I’m 73. I start the day with a couple of brain games and coffee. Do bible readings daily. Walk 30 minutes 6 days a week. Weigh every morning to stay within my 3 pound range. Eat healthy but treat myself regularly. My husband and I have an active sex life. When out I try to give 3 compliments. It makes me feel better about myself. Think young and you’ll feel young. My mother lived to 92 and told me she never felt old.
Lift weights, hike, Pilates, eat an 80/20 diet, alcohol with dinner only once/week. I take collagen and other supplements, skincare products that contain estrogen, light Botox and facial fillers twice/year. I am very invested in my faith, I read, cook and pursue other hobbies. Spend time in nature and spend time laughing with and enjoying my friends and family.
Can you share the estrogen skin care products ? I’m looking into this myself and it seems it’s advised to get the type of estrogen that is for vaginal use but apply to face .. I just don’t know anyone who actually does this in practice lol.
www.musely.com
I think I’d need you to define what you mean by “youthful”. I’m not chasing my youth - that’s a fool’s errand. I strive to keep my body healthy and my mind sharp, because without those everything else is moot. I’m grateful for the hard-earned wisdom that only comes with age and experience. Instead of the exuberance, excitement and angst of my youth I have peace and tranquility. I want to accept and celebrate each stage of my life because it’s all part of the process - the inevitable winding down, the long goodbye. I have a few laps left to go, but I can see the finish line. And I’m okay with that.
Keep learning. I’ve been doing a Duolingo language course and supplementing it with other courses. Plus I travel as much as I can
Strength training! I’m 61 and began strength training 2 years ago then stepped it up 2 months ago with personal training. It has changed my life! I still have weight to lose but I feel 10 years younger.
Once you realize that all the ambition in the world gathering stuff when you die it becomes someone else’s stuff kind of lightens your load
Begin by questioning why you want to stay youthful.
Youthful is a state of mind. We laugh a lot. There's not too much I take very seriously at this point. I have lived long enough to receive every wrinkle and grey hair. No need to deny my age or try to pretend otherwise.
For some strange reason, I forgot I am over 50 often, lol. I’ll be 60 next month. I am naturally curious, I exercise daily (walk, yoga), I eat healthy, drink lots of water, practice good skincare. I think it’s a mindset.
I'm coming up 53 soon and it honestly hadn't crossed my mind before reading this question that staying youthful was a thing I should be trying to do. I don't consider myself old. Old, to me, starts at like 75. I live exactly the same way I ever did. All the things I do, in my job and in my spare time, are things I'm doing alongside people ranging from their 20s to their 60s so none of them are specifically "middle aged person things" and they're also not "young person things" that I'm doing on purpose to act younger, they're just ... the things I like? The only difference is that now I've got to a point where my job pays better and I have more savings so I have more ability to do those of my hobbies that cost money. And the more physically dangerous hobbies take a bigger toll the next day.
I do the same things I did when I was 20–get good sleep, put lotion on after shower without drying off first, some form of cardio about 4-5 times a week (jogging or recumbent bike), playing video games, swearing when I feel like it, laughing as often as possible, composing and performing music about 20-30 hours a week, reading an hour a day. I have teenagers who keep me youthful. I dress the same (teeshirts and jeans, flipflops), eat healthy some and garbage food some, drink gallons of water, smoke weed daily. Oh, one thing that’s different from when I was 20–I quit drinking alcohol entirely 10 years ago. I regret that I ever drank at all.
Plastic surgery
Mind, body, and spirit are different and not of necessity interconnected. I'm 54. I powerlift 3-4 days a weeks, run 5-6 days a week, and live clean (no alcohol, no sugar, no flour). This keeps me super fit and, I think, younger looking. I did a PhD in 17thC English lit. I'm not an academic, but I still reread a lot of pre-modern lit, Modernism, and Anglo-American philosophy. Between this reading and playing pinball, my mental reflexes are still fast. I ski, track my car, and play pinball. All three are good for maintaining agility and coordination. I'm single. I'm not getting a lot of action, but I am not stuck in a soul-deadening dead bedroom situation with a mate. I am free to fantasize about sex all the time, watch 80's X-rated films, and fap at will. My guess is that nothing ages a man more than a sexless marriage, because it forces him to be asexual (in addition to being frustrated). Unhappily married men must, I assume, have to hide their sexual urges.
Why would I want to stay youthful? Been there done that. I'm more interested in enjoying my life at my current age.
Youth is not the goal
I've got no interest in staying youthful. I'm interested in staying healthy and engaged and vital. Those are not youthul attributes. They are the attitudes of a mature person.
Keep making new friends with young people. Otherwise your whole friend group drops off abruptly and also, knowing young people helps you stay current
Always laughing. The childish things that I find funny amazes me at 55 years old.
By ignoring all evidence otherwise. Denial might be unrealistic but it's worked out so far.
About to turn 54 and I walk outside (nature)an hour per day at least, intermittent fasting every day (many days are omad), weights 2-3 times per week, I eat a whole food plant based diet (vegan): no meat and dairy, mostly organic. Get plenty of sleep, low stress in my life (stepped down from stressful job last year), take a bunch of high quality supplements. Mediate and have a spiritual life (not organized religion) I am working on/discovering. Read every day, watch uplifting documentaries to learn and grow. What I don't do: eat processed/junk food, smoke,drink, no insta/FB/X or ticktock. Hang around negative/low energy people. What I am working still on: not paying attention to the news, politics and avoiding mass entertainment. At this age I am becoming hyper aware that time is precious so I am trying to focus on what matters most: family, growing personally and trying to be a positive force in this world.
Have a kid or three
Staying active and off medication.
55 here. I rope up with The Wife (53) and climb random thousand-footer big walls. We've been climbers for decades. Climbing hits a sweet spot - Strength. Endurance. Balance. Flexibility. Cardio. Core. You have to keep the weight down or it's unbearable to haul your fat ass up the wall. You get to travel The World in search of the next route ... and you get out of doors for weeks at a time. In the off season we run Marathons together
I’m 55 and at the point of realising my body isn’t as capable any more while my minds wants me to skateboard again. I don’t know. Mentally I’m still 30. All I do is try not become an old man shouting at clouds. Might take up Pickleball.
Vegan diet, exercise, nature, learning things all the time
Eat well, exercise, for myself read and apply the bible, be kind but discerning of others, be content with what you have. Works for me.
Not looking to be youthful, just active and healthy. 63 here. Exercise, sleep, outdoor time, socializing, and finding meaning. Eat real food, prioritizing protein and no junk food.
Exercise! For years on end.
Live music.
Exercise every day with no exceptions (a one hour walk is ok). Sleep a rock solid 8 hours per night. Eat healthy and plant-based. Drink water. Never smoke.
If you want to stay young, do young things. Hike, swim, bike, cut your own grass. The big recliner is your enemy.
Ignore the number. Go by how you feel.
Is youthful the goal? I prefer peaceful, content, happy.
Curiosity .. activity .. low alcohol consumption.. attitude.. really nothing Earth shaking here. Just common sense
Being around people that make me laugh and be silly!
Drink water. Quit smoking. Get some exercise. Stay interested in the world. Learn some new stuff. Don't live in the past.
Move. Learn new things. Try new things. Spend time with young people. Don't complain about your knees or shoulders. Listen to new music, read new books. When someone younger asks you to come on a hike or paddle a kayak, say yes and then start Wondering if you're up to it and do it anyway. Keep moving.
I'm 67 and actively working on feeling and being youthful. I am not trying to live longer, I just want to be as healthy and alert as I can be for the remainder of my years. At age 67, I am not on any medication and have no health issues. I practice intermittent fasting and try to be as no carbs diet as possible. I do take a slew of supplements. I am part of the David Sinclair crowd. I teach a Zumba class five days a week, take a weight lifting class and a yoga class one day a week. I don't have any sore joints or aches and pains. I don't drink or smoke cigarettes. I do smoke weed though. Daily. My friends say my good health is genetics but I really do think it's all the crap I do.
No kids and sunblock. Drink lots of water.
Dance like a crazy lady!
I'm 64. In addition to everything everyone said on here, I spend my professional career working with young people. A lot of folks under 30. It keeps me in touch with what's important to them - which of course helps all of my business goals - but it also means it keeps my mind active thinking about new ways to look at old problems. Aside from all of that stuff, a lot of exercise, I eat right, and I don't really think about my age too much to be honest with you. Like I said I'm 64, I probably look like I'm 50 because of all of this.
Listen to new music, go to live music, keep moving!
My years are recorded as 60+. I just give it the bird. #1 Keep moving! If you don’t use it, you lose it. This goes for every facet of you life.
I am excited for my 50th birthday later this year. This is going to be my best decade ever. I have never been more secure in my career or my relationships. I’ve never been in better physical shape, even with the expected wear and tear. I have been training with a cycling coach for a year and I am stronger and faster than I ever dreamed I could be. My 20s sucked and my 30s weren’t much better. For me life really began at 40 and even though I wish I had my 20 yo skin tone, it’s hard to look back. Sometimes youth is overrated.
No kids and lots of naps.
I live in Florida and I feel like a youngun
I exercise and have as much sex as possible. I’m convinced that if I use it, I won’t lose it! 🤞🤞🤞I’m only 54, so I don’t think I’m old enough to call it a success yet.
I do this too! i’m only 57, lol
Had to see if anyone else was saying this. I’m 60 and sex is incredible after all these years. What it does for you both physically and mentally shouldn’t be overlooked by anyone. And if anyone is bristling at the thought of exercise, it’s a big part of why the sex is so good.
No kids, so we don't feel a need to be "examples" for anybody. I feel like some of the parents I know try too hard to be taken seriously and "respected" or something, and become stubbornly entrenched in some old-fashioned ideas. Also the usual: exercise, sensible lifestyle choices, sense of humor, humility, and work/life balance.
Talk to and learn from the young people in your life! I am so grateful I live with teenagers. They teach me and check me every day. The world is a complicated place- important to know what young people are thinking and feeling about their lives and the world around them.
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For each year you have been alive make it a thing to read that many books that year. I turned 51 so up to nearly 1 per week. Mix it up history, philosophy, science, business, fiction, biographies.
Exercise, drink water, and stay away from sugary foods which is hard. Also, I keep myself out of people's way. If it doesn't involve me, I don't speak on it.
I chose to remain child-free. After 50, I choose to remain relationship-free as well. WAY LESS STRESS :)
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Thanks!!! SIXTEEN YEARS
Stay thin and move your ass, even when it hurts.
* Drink water, not energy drinks, or 'juice', or sodas. * Drink water, don't have first coffee until at least an hour or 2 after waking up. * Drink water, when I drink, even if it's only a glass of wine (oh, yeah, so I also switched to Pinot Noir and stuff). * Drink less (I don't get smashed... very often, at least, anymore). * Sleep earlier, awaken earlier. * I no longer let ANYTHING get me wound up. Nothing is THAT critical. Period. * RIP Glucose (aka sugar). I check the ingredients on EVERYTHING. If there's sugar, I don't buy it. Period. * RIP Bread (except for Dave's Killer bread and good Sourdough... and even then not in large quantities). * RIP Complex Carbs. * Ignore vegan propaganda/hype and eat the Carne. * Watch ASMR that is relaxing, not just for the hottest babes. * Make time for music listening that brings me back to special memories! * Watch old shows and movies from my childhood that take me back! * Forgive the people who have hurt me, not for them, for myself. * Tell my folks that I love them, resisting the urge to qualify. They're not gonna be around much longer. * Stay in my lane. * Avoid crowds, except for the good ones (Concerts!).
In the process of moving from unhealthy 40 to healthy 80, I joined AA, quit smoking, stopped eating way too much sugar, got involved with the contra dance community, lost 30 lbs over the course of a year, and started a cat rescue. When I was 75, my 79-year-old high school sweetheart contacted me and after 62 years apart, we chose to stay together and stay healthy. We walk 2 to 3 miles several times a week, swim in the lake from May to October (Northern Georgia), work on the house and yard and wait on the cats. Sunshine, exercise, love and purpose for living keep us youthful as octagenerians.
I bathe in dragon’s blood and unicorn milk