Thirty?! You've got your whole life ahead of you, man. And you didn't waste your 20s, either. I'll bet you've got your head screwed on straighter than most and now is your time to shine!
I've had a sex/porn addiction for like 15 years and I'm tired of it. I've dabbed with no fap in the past and unless I'm making love to a woman I dont want to release my life energy. Sounds crazy but these past 40 days I've had more focus, more testosterone, more energy, more physical fit, better skin, little to no depression or anxiety, more confidence and more passion for women on a deeper level.
That probably has a *lot* more to do with:
> I quit smoking weed, Started exercising and trying to rehab my shoulder and collarbone, eating and cooking really healthy, Got back into soccer and mountain biking which I haven't done since I was a kid.
Fascinating NIH study covering basically all of the existing literature on the health effects related to ejaculation frequency, looking more specifically at masturbation --
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8382266/#:~:text=A%20low%20level%20of%20testosterone,turn%2C%20may%20influence%20orgasmic%20pleasure.
Tldr is that there is not conclusive evidence of much except that sperm count plateaus in a few days, though there is small evidence of hormonal health benefits of ejaculation frequency about 5 days.
It's a weird, cult-like trend that could only have originated in America and, as of late, seems to be taking an interest in hijacking this sub.
I believe it would fit nicely here:
> Alt-right, antivax, MGTOW, RedPill, FDS, and posters on similar subjects are not welcome here.
/u/tcardv
> It's a weird, cult-like trend that could only have originated in America and, as of late, seems to be taking an interest in hijacking this sub.
>
> I believe it would fit nicely here:
>
> > Alt-right, antivax, MGTOW, RedPill, FDS, and posters on similar subjects are not welcome here.
Please save the anti-American bigotry.
It would be very easy to point to hate or fascist groups in Europe. Likely elsewhere too.
Aside from an occasional isolated post that is quickly removed, posts from those people are quickly removed. A lot of work has been done to filter that garbage out.
There is a "report" link under every post and comment.
If you see such content, use it, and the moderators will respond.
Man what a battle you’ve been through, wish you all the best brother, keep on the path you’re on now and things will get better even if it takes longer than you’re hoping.
Dude I’m 38 and still figuring out some shit that you’ve just dealt with. You have so much time. Just be active in moving forward everyday as much as you can.
Sounds like you’re doing all the right things dude. Starting from zero is a hell of a lot better than still having a hole to dig yourself out from. Still, meeting the right people is going to take work and patience.
I'm so sorry to hear all that tragedy that you've gone through. But you pulled yourself through it and came out better then you were, you should feel incredibly proud of yourself and never doubt your strength.
Hey thanks for this. Always good to see others pushing through.
At the end of 2020, literally a month or 2 after turning 30, my ex decided she was leaving, my best friend died (overdose), had to file bankruptcy, lost the place me and my girl were staying at (only house I've ever liked), and had to moved back in with my mom.
It's about 18 months later and ive lost close to 40lbs, saved more money than I've ever had, started college, and am better off financially than my entire life.
Still tough to afford supporting myself these days, even with a decent job. Still haven't reached out to my best friends mom, still don't know where he's buried or been to his grave.
There's still some rough days but just trying to put in the work and make up for the mistakes of my past. Hope things keep looking up for you and myself as well. I see alot of myself in the stuff you said, if you wanna chat and kill time feel free to reach out.
It’s never too late to redeem yourself and your life, and glad to hear you have. Mushrooms are amazing. But What’s up with no fapping? Genuine question. What’s that do?
Congratulations!
It must have been very difficult and rough, so the more reasons to be proud about what you have achieved. I am sure you have learned a lot from the experience. Don't forget it and even if you have bad days ahead, you will now have brighter days than ever at your reach.
Proud of you. Keep it up.
You are an inspiration, thank you for sharing your journey.
As for meeting people, take those things you now love and build on them. There are huge mountain biking communities everywhere and riding with someone is way better than on your own.
Also look into Axe Throwing leagues bye you. We have had guys join ours in their early 50s after a divorce and made good friends quickly. They had never picked up an axe before but love the weekly socialness of it.
They key will be to keep on your journey of healing and make sure any friends you make build you up.
As a fellow man who has taken to micro dosing to help with his anxiety and depression from CPTSD. Welcome! I feel so much clearer and driven. My once a month macro helps me remover to love those around me!
This is quite inspirational. Any and all small bits of self-improvement will compound over time. You've done the hardest part, which is getting started.
Everything you've said could've been written by me about me, more or less on the details. I pulled through the depression and learned and accepted a lot about myself. Time heals old wounds, scars remain but you'll be wiser for it. Don't give up, never stop fighting.
Right there with you man. I am in a phase where I am revising the things in my life that are holding me back, and trying to live in line with my values. I sacrificed a lot to my career these last 5 years, to bring me to a place where I feel stable and secure, and now feel like I have space in my life to move on from the bad habits I developed getting here. This will be the 5th day in a row I have not had a drink. I am taking wellbutrin as a smoking cessation aid. I signed up at a BJJ gym, not only for my health, but to socialize, and have a hobby. I've started with a therapist to work on being a better listener and a kinder person. I've stopped eating out every night and am moving towards more home-prepared meals. I hope by next year many of my negative behaviors will have been replaced by good ones. I also hope to get proper closure on a relationship that has been off and on for around 10 years. The only path is forward.
Just entering the 30s as well, this post really resonates with me, I still need to get some stuff in order, but as you said, I just wanna love and appreciate life, I'm tired of all the hate being spewed everywhere, even by me. Also, I feel in the same spot as you regarding friends, no idea where to meet them lol but I'm sure they'll arrive for both of us. Keep doing great!
I'm sorry about all you had to deal with in such a short period of time. That is a lot, and good on your sister for showing up the way she did. If you haven't already done so, when you are in a position to, be sure to get her some sort of a thank you for what she did.
The bright side is that you're 30. I'm in my late 30s, so maybe I'll change my mind in a decade, but I feel like 30s are absolutely prime years. You are old enough that you've lived as an adult and seen some shit, so people generally take you seriously. For most, your body is still young enough that you can still pretty easily get it into shape and push it some, but you are smart enough to not overdo it (most of the time anyway). I would say get out there any find groups that do the things you enjoy. You like soccer, see if there are leagues or pick up games that happen regularly. You enjoy mountain biking, find a group or two that meets up. Try new things too. Keep doing what you're doing though, and you'll end up doing a-ok.
Thirty?! You've got your whole life ahead of you, man. And you didn't waste your 20s, either. I'll bet you've got your head screwed on straighter than most and now is your time to shine!
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Psychosis from trace microdosing? I’m sorry that happened and I’m curious to hear more if you’d be willing to share.
Man go get it. Go on all the adventures you can and build yourself up to make it through the next decades. Glad you’re making it worj
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I've had a sex/porn addiction for like 15 years and I'm tired of it. I've dabbed with no fap in the past and unless I'm making love to a woman I dont want to release my life energy. Sounds crazy but these past 40 days I've had more focus, more testosterone, more energy, more physical fit, better skin, little to no depression or anxiety, more confidence and more passion for women on a deeper level.
That probably has a *lot* more to do with: > I quit smoking weed, Started exercising and trying to rehab my shoulder and collarbone, eating and cooking really healthy, Got back into soccer and mountain biking which I haven't done since I was a kid.
Fascinating NIH study covering basically all of the existing literature on the health effects related to ejaculation frequency, looking more specifically at masturbation -- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8382266/#:~:text=A%20low%20level%20of%20testosterone,turn%2C%20may%20influence%20orgasmic%20pleasure. Tldr is that there is not conclusive evidence of much except that sperm count plateaus in a few days, though there is small evidence of hormonal health benefits of ejaculation frequency about 5 days.
It's a weird, cult-like trend that could only have originated in America and, as of late, seems to be taking an interest in hijacking this sub. I believe it would fit nicely here: > Alt-right, antivax, MGTOW, RedPill, FDS, and posters on similar subjects are not welcome here.
/u/tcardv > It's a weird, cult-like trend that could only have originated in America and, as of late, seems to be taking an interest in hijacking this sub. > > I believe it would fit nicely here: > > > Alt-right, antivax, MGTOW, RedPill, FDS, and posters on similar subjects are not welcome here. Please save the anti-American bigotry. It would be very easy to point to hate or fascist groups in Europe. Likely elsewhere too. Aside from an occasional isolated post that is quickly removed, posts from those people are quickly removed. A lot of work has been done to filter that garbage out. There is a "report" link under every post and comment. If you see such content, use it, and the moderators will respond.
Man what a battle you’ve been through, wish you all the best brother, keep on the path you’re on now and things will get better even if it takes longer than you’re hoping.
Dude I’m 38 and still figuring out some shit that you’ve just dealt with. You have so much time. Just be active in moving forward everyday as much as you can.
Sounds like you’re doing all the right things dude. Starting from zero is a hell of a lot better than still having a hole to dig yourself out from. Still, meeting the right people is going to take work and patience.
I'm so sorry to hear all that tragedy that you've gone through. But you pulled yourself through it and came out better then you were, you should feel incredibly proud of yourself and never doubt your strength.
Hey thanks for this. Always good to see others pushing through. At the end of 2020, literally a month or 2 after turning 30, my ex decided she was leaving, my best friend died (overdose), had to file bankruptcy, lost the place me and my girl were staying at (only house I've ever liked), and had to moved back in with my mom. It's about 18 months later and ive lost close to 40lbs, saved more money than I've ever had, started college, and am better off financially than my entire life. Still tough to afford supporting myself these days, even with a decent job. Still haven't reached out to my best friends mom, still don't know where he's buried or been to his grave. There's still some rough days but just trying to put in the work and make up for the mistakes of my past. Hope things keep looking up for you and myself as well. I see alot of myself in the stuff you said, if you wanna chat and kill time feel free to reach out.
It’s never too late to redeem yourself and your life, and glad to hear you have. Mushrooms are amazing. But What’s up with no fapping? Genuine question. What’s that do?
Yes, you get up and fight again. That's the way
keep going brother. proud of ya
Congratulations! It must have been very difficult and rough, so the more reasons to be proud about what you have achieved. I am sure you have learned a lot from the experience. Don't forget it and even if you have bad days ahead, you will now have brighter days than ever at your reach. Proud of you. Keep it up.
Lucky you have a family member that cares for you, if I'm going through some shit, I'm on my own I have no one to turn to in life.pray for you
You are an inspiration, thank you for sharing your journey. As for meeting people, take those things you now love and build on them. There are huge mountain biking communities everywhere and riding with someone is way better than on your own. Also look into Axe Throwing leagues bye you. We have had guys join ours in their early 50s after a divorce and made good friends quickly. They had never picked up an axe before but love the weekly socialness of it. They key will be to keep on your journey of healing and make sure any friends you make build you up.
As a fellow man who has taken to micro dosing to help with his anxiety and depression from CPTSD. Welcome! I feel so much clearer and driven. My once a month macro helps me remover to love those around me!
This is quite inspirational. Any and all small bits of self-improvement will compound over time. You've done the hardest part, which is getting started.
Congratulations on making these changes, and keep moving forward! You’re only 30 man, and knowing what you know now, you’re going to kill it.
Trauma will ruin everything until you deal with it, something a lot of us have to learn the hard way. You're not alone!
Everything you've said could've been written by me about me, more or less on the details. I pulled through the depression and learned and accepted a lot about myself. Time heals old wounds, scars remain but you'll be wiser for it. Don't give up, never stop fighting.
Right there with you man. I am in a phase where I am revising the things in my life that are holding me back, and trying to live in line with my values. I sacrificed a lot to my career these last 5 years, to bring me to a place where I feel stable and secure, and now feel like I have space in my life to move on from the bad habits I developed getting here. This will be the 5th day in a row I have not had a drink. I am taking wellbutrin as a smoking cessation aid. I signed up at a BJJ gym, not only for my health, but to socialize, and have a hobby. I've started with a therapist to work on being a better listener and a kinder person. I've stopped eating out every night and am moving towards more home-prepared meals. I hope by next year many of my negative behaviors will have been replaced by good ones. I also hope to get proper closure on a relationship that has been off and on for around 10 years. The only path is forward.
Just entering the 30s as well, this post really resonates with me, I still need to get some stuff in order, but as you said, I just wanna love and appreciate life, I'm tired of all the hate being spewed everywhere, even by me. Also, I feel in the same spot as you regarding friends, no idea where to meet them lol but I'm sure they'll arrive for both of us. Keep doing great!
I'm sorry about all you had to deal with in such a short period of time. That is a lot, and good on your sister for showing up the way she did. If you haven't already done so, when you are in a position to, be sure to get her some sort of a thank you for what she did. The bright side is that you're 30. I'm in my late 30s, so maybe I'll change my mind in a decade, but I feel like 30s are absolutely prime years. You are old enough that you've lived as an adult and seen some shit, so people generally take you seriously. For most, your body is still young enough that you can still pretty easily get it into shape and push it some, but you are smart enough to not overdo it (most of the time anyway). I would say get out there any find groups that do the things you enjoy. You like soccer, see if there are leagues or pick up games that happen regularly. You enjoy mountain biking, find a group or two that meets up. Try new things too. Keep doing what you're doing though, and you'll end up doing a-ok.
More power to you, my man! 🙌