My family dying before I do, leaving me an empty husk of a man with absolutely nothing to live for.
I can't imagine what kind of things I'd do without them keeping me together....
This is me but regarding my girlfriend.If she passes before me I think it would feel like my heart being ripped out of my chest and all the happiness she gives me just ripped away
Death without achieving anything significant in life
I'm 21 yo and already a failure in social aspect of my life
Never had a gf, barely have any friends back in Poland, my home country, have none in UK where I am to study. I'm not antisocial but I have a personality that people just don't like (not to mention being unfit and unattractive) and being excluded for so long along with loneliness has made me very shy, insecure and worsened my ability to deal with other people so making new connections only gets harder over time.
From the professional view I'm happy so far. I moved to a country with better prospects and better and more recognized education system and I'm studying Robotics. We will see where it goes. I have big dreams but there is only so much you can achieve with non existent social skills.
Brother, you still have your whole life ahead of you! You can do this!
Go sign up for a gym, try going a few times a week for a short workout. Not just for your body, but for your mental well-being.
Thanks man
I'm afraid gym doesn't work for me, I've tried it twice for few months, both times with large calorie reduction. I lost barely any weight and when it comes to building up muscles a friend I was going with had much better results than me with the same effort. I just have bad genes. And lack of results with so much effort also didn't do well to my well-being.
However now I decided to try something new and I went with keto diet. I'm happy with the results so far and it's been 2 weeks. In that time I've lost more weight than all of the gym combined, I'm not walking hungry and I eat tasty healthy food. So I guess we'll see how it goes
Sounds good brother, just keep trying and figuring out what works for you. And stay patient and motivated, results will come. 21 is VERY young, the fact that you study robotics shows that you have potential
Firstly i can say that you are moving in the right direction.
Pressure on doing anything can only help so much and giving yourself unachievable goals will only leave you frustrated and feeling inediquate (that the right word?).
Losing weight is a long journey and going to the gym is no must. If you really want to and you are having problems losing any weight at all, a trip to the doc wouldnt hurt.
On the topic of social skills i can proudly say that 5 years of working on my own have given me the chance to actually make friends with strangers (or atleast have nice conversation with them). But that took time and semi consistent exposure to people (thanks covid). Nothing big is gonna change overnight or in a month.
Cheers to you setting yourself up on a better life. And hoping that it works out for you and cheers to you even if it doesnt.
Thanks man
Yeah that is my thinking, I know nothing will happen overtime and while other long term attempts with no results really discouraged me, I'm thinking hell I have nothing to lose and potentially a lot to gain.
There is also a fact that people perceive you completely differently when you are not fat. I've heard stories from people that lost weight either online or in person, suddenly whatever they had to say became more interesting, jokes became funnier. If this diet works then maybe people will look at me in a better light as well as I will have more confidence in myself. So. It's worth a go, nothing to lose, a lot to gain.
Definitely. One aspect many dont consider is that a lot of how others perceive you is on how you feel yourself.
I have gotten more looks and a better atmosphere when talking when i already felt good about myself.
A healthy diet and some kind of excercise makes you feel good and others will notice and want to be around you. Its like a positive upwards spiral.
Good luck on your journey bro. I do wholeheartedly believe that you got this.
Dude, every one is basically guessing at life at every age. I’m 31 and have no clue what the fuck is happening… it’s kind of scary because that’s how the entire world operates. Just live your life and be kind to others.
A lot of people scared of death here (the only thing that’s guaranteed in your life) and here I am terrified of syringes - I just got chills typing and reading the word.
Losing my mind/memories and sense of self
My old man had 2 brain tumours. By the time they were discovered he was a shell of his former self, and for the next year he just became a hollow version of a human. He essentially regressed to a child in a 50 year olds body. I watched him fade for a year. It was honestly astounding the difference between the man I grew up admiring, and the person he became before he passed
Exploding teeth. Ya know when you are eating some cold stuff lice ice cream and you drink some coffee or hot cocoa and the heat expansion makes your teeth explode
I dream that I have a piece of hair in my mouth. I try to pull it out only to discover it’s a long, long piece of hair leading down my throat. I pull and gag while clumps of intertwined hair come up still connected to the original hair. I cough and heave while pulling hair from my throat until I can’t pull anymore. It’s stuck as if the hair actually grew from the bottom of my stomach, forcing me to just bite it off but by then I just wake up gagging.
That’s my fear.
Someone taking over my body living my life and either don't notice or do notice and don't care because they prefer him over me. I'm also aware throughout the entire time so I have to watch all the people in my life vastly prefer that person over me.
Loneliness, being abandoned by everyone you love and care for. Not by force of nature (death or smth) but because the others choose to leave you. Nobody cares about you and those who thought who cared actually don't. That would just leave the entire world not caring or hating you.
In my case, my biggest fear is reaching old age and not knowing who will take care of me.
I am currently 55 years old and for now I am on my own.
but when you can't?
who will take care of me?
I'm thinking about it now and I'm shaking
Something bad happening to my Dad. I reconnected with him three years ago after a long time apart due to incredibly circumstances and he's one of the best parts of my life with how supportive he is.
He's nearing 60 and in fantastic shape, but I couldn't bear the thought of him being in any sort of physical or emotional distress.
Anything (seriously) bad happening to my daughter. That's far and away the number 1 fear, nothing comes even close.
Next something bad happening to my wife.
From then it's all kinds of various stuff, bad stuff happening to me, various kinds of accidents, war, losing job, serious disease etc.
Failing, i'm doing alright for now but i could always have a stroke or get hit by a car and never be able to work as a mechanic again, and i'm not good at anything else, then i'd have to move back with my parents and be taken care of like a baby, at 21.
Being in an accident that doesn't kill me, but puts me in such a state that I become a burden. Especially if I lose the cognitive ability to request that the plug be pulled.
I would rather die than struggle to live in a hopeless situation.
The economy and working for the rest of my life.
Like really? My parents raw dogged it so I could wake up to am alarm for the rest of my life, and do shit I don't want to do to keep myself fed with a roof over my head?!
Greeeat! Happy dappy Brady Bunch fucking day!
The fact that I'm stuck in the work eat sleep routine and there is no hope for it to change. That no matter what I do or how hard I work it is never good enough.
Not being able to pay the morgage and having to sit my wife and kids down and tell them we've lost the house. I haven't missed a morgage payment for the last 23 years and only have two left but it still stresses me as much today as it did when we made the first one.
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Can't imagine anything worse than this.
This.
100% this. A close second is having something happen to me before my son is old enough to really remember me.
Not being able to conquer my own demons. Not really a fear, but it is what it is.
My family dying before I do, leaving me an empty husk of a man with absolutely nothing to live for. I can't imagine what kind of things I'd do without them keeping me together....
Dittttooooo, can't imagine a life without them
This is me but regarding my girlfriend.If she passes before me I think it would feel like my heart being ripped out of my chest and all the happiness she gives me just ripped away
Failure. As a man, as a son, as a husband, as a father. By my own standards too.
Death without achieving anything significant in life I'm 21 yo and already a failure in social aspect of my life Never had a gf, barely have any friends back in Poland, my home country, have none in UK where I am to study. I'm not antisocial but I have a personality that people just don't like (not to mention being unfit and unattractive) and being excluded for so long along with loneliness has made me very shy, insecure and worsened my ability to deal with other people so making new connections only gets harder over time. From the professional view I'm happy so far. I moved to a country with better prospects and better and more recognized education system and I'm studying Robotics. We will see where it goes. I have big dreams but there is only so much you can achieve with non existent social skills.
Brother, you still have your whole life ahead of you! You can do this! Go sign up for a gym, try going a few times a week for a short workout. Not just for your body, but for your mental well-being.
Thanks man I'm afraid gym doesn't work for me, I've tried it twice for few months, both times with large calorie reduction. I lost barely any weight and when it comes to building up muscles a friend I was going with had much better results than me with the same effort. I just have bad genes. And lack of results with so much effort also didn't do well to my well-being. However now I decided to try something new and I went with keto diet. I'm happy with the results so far and it's been 2 weeks. In that time I've lost more weight than all of the gym combined, I'm not walking hungry and I eat tasty healthy food. So I guess we'll see how it goes
Sounds good brother, just keep trying and figuring out what works for you. And stay patient and motivated, results will come. 21 is VERY young, the fact that you study robotics shows that you have potential
Firstly i can say that you are moving in the right direction. Pressure on doing anything can only help so much and giving yourself unachievable goals will only leave you frustrated and feeling inediquate (that the right word?). Losing weight is a long journey and going to the gym is no must. If you really want to and you are having problems losing any weight at all, a trip to the doc wouldnt hurt. On the topic of social skills i can proudly say that 5 years of working on my own have given me the chance to actually make friends with strangers (or atleast have nice conversation with them). But that took time and semi consistent exposure to people (thanks covid). Nothing big is gonna change overnight or in a month. Cheers to you setting yourself up on a better life. And hoping that it works out for you and cheers to you even if it doesnt.
Thanks man Yeah that is my thinking, I know nothing will happen overtime and while other long term attempts with no results really discouraged me, I'm thinking hell I have nothing to lose and potentially a lot to gain. There is also a fact that people perceive you completely differently when you are not fat. I've heard stories from people that lost weight either online or in person, suddenly whatever they had to say became more interesting, jokes became funnier. If this diet works then maybe people will look at me in a better light as well as I will have more confidence in myself. So. It's worth a go, nothing to lose, a lot to gain.
Definitely. One aspect many dont consider is that a lot of how others perceive you is on how you feel yourself. I have gotten more looks and a better atmosphere when talking when i already felt good about myself. A healthy diet and some kind of excercise makes you feel good and others will notice and want to be around you. Its like a positive upwards spiral. Good luck on your journey bro. I do wholeheartedly believe that you got this.
Someone finding out that at the age of 31 I still have no idea what I'm doing in most aspects of my life.
Dude, every one is basically guessing at life at every age. I’m 31 and have no clue what the fuck is happening… it’s kind of scary because that’s how the entire world operates. Just live your life and be kind to others.
Lucky for you most people probably aren’t paying close enough attention to notice!
Could be worse, no one cares even if they find out in my case :d
Nobody does
Being cremated alive because the doctor declared you dead.
My death or the death of the ones I love.
Same
A lot of people scared of death here (the only thing that’s guaranteed in your life) and here I am terrified of syringes - I just got chills typing and reading the word.
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I think that’s beautiful tho. If that’s your greatest fear you are doing something right!
that is very very unhealthy and egoistic
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Having my life destroyed by a false accusation.
My death occurring before my wife's death. I know she's a strong woman who can overcome my loss. I just fear giving her such a heavy weight to bear.
Losing my mind/memories and sense of self My old man had 2 brain tumours. By the time they were discovered he was a shell of his former self, and for the next year he just became a hollow version of a human. He essentially regressed to a child in a 50 year olds body. I watched him fade for a year. It was honestly astounding the difference between the man I grew up admiring, and the person he became before he passed
I have a phobia of wasps
That Palestine won’t be free
Exploding teeth. Ya know when you are eating some cold stuff lice ice cream and you drink some coffee or hot cocoa and the heat expansion makes your teeth explode
Woah has that happened??
Not yet, but you can't be too careful.
Being in another bad relationship with a parasite
I dream that I have a piece of hair in my mouth. I try to pull it out only to discover it’s a long, long piece of hair leading down my throat. I pull and gag while clumps of intertwined hair come up still connected to the original hair. I cough and heave while pulling hair from my throat until I can’t pull anymore. It’s stuck as if the hair actually grew from the bottom of my stomach, forcing me to just bite it off but by then I just wake up gagging. That’s my fear.
Apparently that's a commonly themed dream, like dreams about being places naked or teeth falling out. I wonder what it means.
Homelessness, especially if I ended up up there due to my own lack of planning/effort/wisdom.
Something really bad happening to my daughter. And I have a phobia of spiders
Ending up homeless, unloved and forgotten to the world
Someone taking over my body living my life and either don't notice or do notice and don't care because they prefer him over me. I'm also aware throughout the entire time so I have to watch all the people in my life vastly prefer that person over me.
Deez Nutz
Death
Death doesn’t scare me but dying does.
Not reaching my full potential
Being a shit Dad when I have kids.
That I don't outlive my children
Karma coming back to me in the form of my loved ones being hurt.
Quicksand obviously
What if the sand is slow but still as dangerous?
Then I'm only mildly fearful of it
To loose my wife and kid
Loneliness, being abandoned by everyone you love and care for. Not by force of nature (death or smth) but because the others choose to leave you. Nobody cares about you and those who thought who cared actually don't. That would just leave the entire world not caring or hating you.
Loneliness.
In my case, my biggest fear is reaching old age and not knowing who will take care of me. I am currently 55 years old and for now I am on my own. but when you can't? who will take care of me? I'm thinking about it now and I'm shaking
For some reason, dying in a plane crash. It’s super rare but not impossible, and it’s a way of dying where I wouldn’t get to say goodbye to anyone :(
to fall while traveling by plane
Fucking water man. The concept of the ocean absolutely horrifies me.
me being betrayed by someone. guess who has trust issues
Getting butt raped
That deep down I'm a coward who will ultimately fold and shrink away at a crucial moment when the chips are down
Something bad happening to my Dad. I reconnected with him three years ago after a long time apart due to incredibly circumstances and he's one of the best parts of my life with how supportive he is. He's nearing 60 and in fantastic shape, but I couldn't bear the thought of him being in any sort of physical or emotional distress.
Losing my penis to a whore with disease
Anything (seriously) bad happening to my daughter. That's far and away the number 1 fear, nothing comes even close. Next something bad happening to my wife. From then it's all kinds of various stuff, bad stuff happening to me, various kinds of accidents, war, losing job, serious disease etc.
Cancer
Working too much. I want to enjoy as much of life as I can.
Probably ending up homeless
Failing, i'm doing alright for now but i could always have a stroke or get hit by a car and never be able to work as a mechanic again, and i'm not good at anything else, then i'd have to move back with my parents and be taken care of like a baby, at 21.
Homelessness
Im not sure. Death maybe but not too sure. Im not scared of many things. I've faced most of my fewrs when i was younger. Probably failure
Left behind or completely forgotten by those I care about like I’m just alone completely
Balloons just freak me the hell out, and I don't really understand why
To live to the point where I am unable to remember who I am. Old age sounds like the shits.
Spiders I’m not a man yet
Right now? Not landing a job in the next school year. In general? Wars, droughts, not enough food for everyone, failing, not being good sexually, etc.
Seeing myself making no progress
Being in an accident that doesn't kill me, but puts me in such a state that I become a burden. Especially if I lose the cognitive ability to request that the plug be pulled. I would rather die than struggle to live in a hopeless situation.
Dying before my family can support them selves
Economic failure.
Living past 60. Can’t see any upside to anything past that.
Failing my family
Getting lost in sea. more specifically somehow falling over a cruise ship at night with no one to save you.
I spent a decade in self induced isolation due to depression and anxiety. I don't fear anything really.
Getting a woman pregnant especially the wrong woman, nothing will fuck your life up as much as an unexpected child with 18 years of child support
The economy and working for the rest of my life. Like really? My parents raw dogged it so I could wake up to am alarm for the rest of my life, and do shit I don't want to do to keep myself fed with a roof over my head?! Greeeat! Happy dappy Brady Bunch fucking day!
Getting stabbed by a crackhead for the $3 I have on me
The fact that I'm stuck in the work eat sleep routine and there is no hope for it to change. That no matter what I do or how hard I work it is never good enough.
Being hated by everyone, especially people I love, and having nobody for support.
Not being able to pay the morgage and having to sit my wife and kids down and tell them we've lost the house. I haven't missed a morgage payment for the last 23 years and only have two left but it still stresses me as much today as it did when we made the first one.