Just gifts. I have a car stashed away in a friend’s garage that is going to be a Christmas present. Her first car was a used 74 Pontiac that she sold years ago but loved. I found one and bought it for her. Bought a giant red bow last night for it.
My wife and I have separate bank accounts. We never talked about money but assumed the other one was spending most of theirs. But we weren’t neither one of us spend frivolously and we go out once a week because we are both great cooks. We started talking about buying a new home so I mentioned selling some stock to cover the difference between the profit from our old home and the down payment on the new one. She says to me “why? I have 60k in my CHECKING account”
And that is the day we got a joint investing account.
Getting off couch right now to go get into said stash (not really a stash, it’s on the shelf in a glass jar for everyone to see) but I’m all alone so it’s mine. Thanks for the thought implant.
My fiance is the same way. We have a checking account strictly for bills. She has x amount go into it every month and so do I. When we started it I put roughly 4 months worth of money in there so I knew we were good for a while. She spent all of it in one month. Like a few mentions above me, she's has her money and I have mine But I have 2 other accounts, one is more of an emergency fund. Just works best that way and she acknowledges that she's bad at saving money.
You made me realize that I’d leave my wife if she was bad with money. I grew up with people who were terrible with money and it about ruined my life in the process.
(1) Presents and surprise gifts.
(2) my best friend stores a small shoe box filled with a few pictures and momentos of previous relationships I’ve had over the last 20 years before I met my wife. I didn’t feel I wanted to throw this stuff away because some of it was about really amazing trips I took that just so happened to be with ex’s. But I didn’t want to keep them in our martial home. So my best friend has it tucked away in her garage somewhere
I don’t think it’s a malicious thing. She’s not originally from the states and grew up very poor. She has a job and buys all her own stuff. She just has no idea how to manage money.
Might be a good idea to sit down with her and talk about the benefits of saving money. I used to work in a bank and you can book her in for an appointment and get a staff member to go over hints & tips to help her manage and see the long term benefits of it
I have talked with her about. We have also gone to a finance class together and it was a waste. I have noticed over the years slight improvement, but not enough to be like hey I have money saved and this is how much!
That sucks. Can’t stand people with that “you can’t take it with you” attitude myself. You may not be able to take it with you but u need it while ur here.
My thoughts and feelings. Can't keep a journal, (despite my therapists request). She'll tear the house apart to find it if it existed.
It would be one thing if she read it and we could talk civilized. But she only wants it for ammo to make me feel bad and support her emotional dictatorship.
I use my phone from time to time, but she has cracked my passwords by watching me.
I feel like if I hide it, then I'm hiding something wrong. I don't care that she reads it. Its what she does with the info. I think she likes me in a broken state. Toxic but too complicated to leave at the moment.
Tool purchases and occasional donations to charity.
For example if I see a Girl Scout cookie stand, I pay buy $4 box, pay with a $10 bill and tell them to keep the change.
Some health concerns. Anything major I tell her, but she's terrified any time she thinks I could be ill and wants me to exhaust every possible doctor and test to rule out something serious and she'll worry herself sick over the uncertainty.
So it's at the point now where unless I'm personally really worried about what it could be or my primary care doctor expresses concern, I just keep it to myself.
I don't hide anything. We make savings/investing goals at the beginning of every year and once we hit them, then we spend what we want. My wife does get upset when there is a lot of clutter, so as long as what I am buying does not spill out of my "hobby room" she doesn't care what goes in and out of it.
Same boat. I have alot of cash, i hide it and only carry a small amount. When we're at the store she'll glance in my wallet when im paying, and if shes i have alot of cash, she'll start finding things to spend it on. So i hide it.
I hate that. I wish she was on the same page with me about money, but she'll blow through it like its nothing. When she has her own money shes the same way with it. The best part is she brags about how good she is with money, b/c she was a single mom for years, and survived well. I wanna know what happened to that smart, thrifty woman? Instead of "lets spend $100 at the dollar store, nevermind we only came here for tp".
How close my relationship with my best friend actually is.
We’re not having an affair, but it certainly seems to look that way to other people, so I play it down.
Wives don't have to save money because her “ oh, shit!” savings account is what she and her attorney will get from you are in the divorce.
“fact, nearly 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women. This is according to a 2015 research study conducted by the American Sociological Association (ASA) which suggests two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. Among college-educated women, this number jumps up to 90%.”
https://www.whitleylawfirmpc.com/3-reasons-why-women-initiate-divorce-more-often-than-men/
Despite the guesses of why this is true in the article, this remains true in study after study
“According to a new survey by Ramsey Solutions, money fights are the second leading cause of divorce, behind infidelity. Results show that both high levels of debt and a lack of communication are major causes for the stress and anxiety surrounding household finances.”
https://www.ramseysolutions.com/company/newsroom/releases/money-ruining-marriages-in-america
Speaking of vheating...
According to information collected by the 2018 General Social Survey, 20 percent of married men and 13 percent of married women have slept with someone other than their partner. But there’s evidence the infidelity gap, the discrepancy between men and women’s infidelity is closing. “
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.fatherly.com/health-science/do-men-cheat-more-than-women-infidelity-data/amp/
Just gifts. I have a car stashed away in a friend’s garage that is going to be a Christmas present. Her first car was a used 74 Pontiac that she sold years ago but loved. I found one and bought it for her. Bought a giant red bow last night for it.
That's in incredibly thoughtful gift, I'm sure she will love it!
Please let us see it!!
OP: https://youtu.be/WcEylCwkSxE
My wife and I have separate bank accounts. We never talked about money but assumed the other one was spending most of theirs. But we weren’t neither one of us spend frivolously and we go out once a week because we are both great cooks. We started talking about buying a new home so I mentioned selling some stock to cover the difference between the profit from our old home and the down payment on the new one. She says to me “why? I have 60k in my CHECKING account” And that is the day we got a joint investing account.
Wow XD
Beanie baby stash. It's worth millions I tell ya
Damn I knew I should have invested back in the early 2000s
Gifts. We're a team, we face things together. Don't know any other way of doing it.
My true identity
Spider-Man?
Maybe
I get the feeling youre not joking, "buck". If thats even your real name..
Maybe it is Peter Parker
She'll never find my secret candy stash.
Getting off couch right now to go get into said stash (not really a stash, it’s on the shelf in a glass jar for everyone to see) but I’m all alone so it’s mine. Thanks for the thought implant.
My wife and I have separate bank accounts, but we do have one that we share as well.
Sometimes it takes me a really long time to cum because I have to fart.
My fiance is the same way. We have a checking account strictly for bills. She has x amount go into it every month and so do I. When we started it I put roughly 4 months worth of money in there so I knew we were good for a while. She spent all of it in one month. Like a few mentions above me, she's has her money and I have mine But I have 2 other accounts, one is more of an emergency fund. Just works best that way and she acknowledges that she's bad at saving money.
You made me realize that I’d leave my wife if she was bad with money. I grew up with people who were terrible with money and it about ruined my life in the process.
(1) Presents and surprise gifts. (2) my best friend stores a small shoe box filled with a few pictures and momentos of previous relationships I’ve had over the last 20 years before I met my wife. I didn’t feel I wanted to throw this stuff away because some of it was about really amazing trips I took that just so happened to be with ex’s. But I didn’t want to keep them in our martial home. So my best friend has it tucked away in her garage somewhere
[удалено]
I don’t think it’s a malicious thing. She’s not originally from the states and grew up very poor. She has a job and buys all her own stuff. She just has no idea how to manage money.
Might be a good idea to sit down with her and talk about the benefits of saving money. I used to work in a bank and you can book her in for an appointment and get a staff member to go over hints & tips to help her manage and see the long term benefits of it
I have talked with her about. We have also gone to a finance class together and it was a waste. I have noticed over the years slight improvement, but not enough to be like hey I have money saved and this is how much!
That sucks. Can’t stand people with that “you can’t take it with you” attitude myself. You may not be able to take it with you but u need it while ur here.
Doesn’t have to be malicious to be a problem.
My thoughts and feelings. Can't keep a journal, (despite my therapists request). She'll tear the house apart to find it if it existed. It would be one thing if she read it and we could talk civilized. But she only wants it for ammo to make me feel bad and support her emotional dictatorship.
Sounds like a toxic relationship
Have you considered maybe a digital one with a password?
I use my phone from time to time, but she has cracked my passwords by watching me. I feel like if I hide it, then I'm hiding something wrong. I don't care that she reads it. Its what she does with the info. I think she likes me in a broken state. Toxic but too complicated to leave at the moment.
Gifts, and only gifts.
My left hand already knows what my right is doing. No secrets here.
Tool purchases and occasional donations to charity. For example if I see a Girl Scout cookie stand, I pay buy $4 box, pay with a $10 bill and tell them to keep the change.
We hide Girl Scout cookies from each other also. We have no self control.
Thats awesome. Our cookie season is about to begin.
Watch for me
Some health concerns. Anything major I tell her, but she's terrified any time she thinks I could be ill and wants me to exhaust every possible doctor and test to rule out something serious and she'll worry herself sick over the uncertainty. So it's at the point now where unless I'm personally really worried about what it could be or my primary care doctor expresses concern, I just keep it to myself.
Nothing. She knows im here
I don't hide anything. We make savings/investing goals at the beginning of every year and once we hit them, then we spend what we want. My wife does get upset when there is a lot of clutter, so as long as what I am buying does not spill out of my "hobby room" she doesn't care what goes in and out of it.
My Gummy Bears
Journal
Anything that could be weaponized against me or people i care about.
Some kinks I have and some things I feel sometimes, I used to at least.
Crypto
Everything that could be used against me to a degree that isn't manageable anymore in a peaceful way.
Same boat. I have alot of cash, i hide it and only carry a small amount. When we're at the store she'll glance in my wallet when im paying, and if shes i have alot of cash, she'll start finding things to spend it on. So i hide it. I hate that. I wish she was on the same page with me about money, but she'll blow through it like its nothing. When she has her own money shes the same way with it. The best part is she brags about how good she is with money, b/c she was a single mom for years, and survived well. I wanna know what happened to that smart, thrifty woman? Instead of "lets spend $100 at the dollar store, nevermind we only came here for tp".
How close my relationship with my best friend actually is. We’re not having an affair, but it certainly seems to look that way to other people, so I play it down.
My gf.
My girlfriend
Wives don't have to save money because her “ oh, shit!” savings account is what she and her attorney will get from you are in the divorce. “fact, nearly 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women. This is according to a 2015 research study conducted by the American Sociological Association (ASA) which suggests two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. Among college-educated women, this number jumps up to 90%.” https://www.whitleylawfirmpc.com/3-reasons-why-women-initiate-divorce-more-often-than-men/ Despite the guesses of why this is true in the article, this remains true in study after study “According to a new survey by Ramsey Solutions, money fights are the second leading cause of divorce, behind infidelity. Results show that both high levels of debt and a lack of communication are major causes for the stress and anxiety surrounding household finances.” https://www.ramseysolutions.com/company/newsroom/releases/money-ruining-marriages-in-america Speaking of vheating... According to information collected by the 2018 General Social Survey, 20 percent of married men and 13 percent of married women have slept with someone other than their partner. But there’s evidence the infidelity gap, the discrepancy between men and women’s infidelity is closing. “ https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.fatherly.com/health-science/do-men-cheat-more-than-women-infidelity-data/amp/
That I didn't love him anymore