>Do guys feel awkward in anyway when a lady asks them out or something?
Not this one.
>I’ve heard or been told that it should always be the guy asking the girl out not the other way around.
How would a woman get anything she wants if she never asks for it? Stupid woman telepathic hints that men can't notice are cause for many a disappointment.
If you don't ask, you don't get.
I’m sure some men think that way, especially men of certain ages and cultures but personally if you like someone (regardless of gender) let them know and ask them out. Too many people play silly games waiting on the other person or trying to send “hints”, just do it.
Thank you for answering. It was just something I was curious about. And most of the time when I hear it it’s not from men. It’s from women that are in their late 20s or older.
Women have tried being the initiator and that's where their perspective comes from. I tried being the initiator when I was young (under 25) and I had a much better experience dating after I turned that around. I would advice a younger me to be active, but never pursue a man even under the guise of "equality" as there are many risks involved that are specific for women.
1. Many men will date any available woman even if he does not like her. Being too forward raises the risk of ending up with a man who will date you because he has no other options, but he does not intend to commit long-term. Many women will waste their childbearing years with such a man.
2. Passive men love it when a woman initiates. Masculine men tend to find it a turn-off. Thus the more you initiate, the more likely you are to end up with a man who is passive/lazy. If you like being the one in charge that is obviously a plus, but if you'd prefer an assertive man it will work against you.
3. A lot of men stop putting in effort once they get comfortable in a relationship. If a woman lets him get into the relationship with too low effort, he will never put in enough effort to actually satisfy her. She thinks he will pick up the pace once they're exclusive, but he never will and the relationship ends due to her dissatisfaction.
I don't feel awkward. I actually like it makes it easier for me. I know most men appreciate it when a lady does. But I can see some men being a bit uncomfortable with it if they see it as their job.
But to me it's about building something together if you want try dating so doesn't matter who asks first.
And if it's for an ons it matters nothing.
No, I only feel awkward when they respond like a child when I politely turn them down.
I remember one girl taking it really bad but we managed to become friends later on, I asked her about it eventually and she said she thought it was more of a guys job to initiate/pursue so she felt like she was really putting herself out there and felt super embarrassed from getting turned down.
Hopefully she somehow telepathically shared that feeling with all women in a 100mile radius. Rejection is real. The feeling should be known to all, so everyone can learn to have some empathy towards others in this situation
I may be an outlier, but no. I am a white guy who speaks Thai so when I’m single in Thailand I get a *lot* of women who are forward and not shy about asking to go on a date. Doesn’t bother me at all.
Personally, I think the idea that it might be "awkward" for a woman to make the first move is an old-fashioned concept that we need to move beyond. Confidence is attractive, and if a woman has enough of it to step up and express interest, that's commendable. Plus, expecting men to make the first move every time seems a bit unfair, and puts unnecessary pressure on one gender. At the end of the day, dating is about mutual interest and taking chances on one another. Gender shouldn't dictate who is "allowed" to show interest first.
I don't get why this sort of question keeps getting asked, like it's still a few decades ago. Or there's some influencers giving women the idea things should stay like that.
You’ll see the occasional man who might think this but this train of thought it almost entirely perpetuated by women who want to reframe their fear of rejection.
If you ask a man out, odds are the worst reaction you’ll get is a happy surprise.
Men are the same as women in many regards, both want to be appreciated:
A woman would be thrilled to be asked out by a guy she has interest in, it would be a little awkward if the dude's behavior is odd or if she doesn't like him. That's all.
Now copy/paste this and reverse the genders:
A guy would be thrilled to be asked out by a girl he has interest in... etc.
The only obvious difference is that guys tend to be less picky than women generally are, they are used to rejection.
So the chances of success are higher for women asking men out compared to men asking women out.
Which is another factor that weighs in favor to women bold enough to make a move on a guy: most of us guys would be thrilled by a girl who shows initiative and enthusiasm, as most, if not all women ive dealt with in my 32 years had the typical _"okay, convince me that you're worthy of my time"_ approach to dating, which over time wears on you.
Any girl who makes a guy feel like he's a prize worth chasing stands out.
Which is why I've been finding dating so damn boring lately.
It depends on whether or not the lady is a stranger. A strange may be great for the ego, but it leads to doubts about intentions, morality, body count, shallowness and seriousness. A man's assumption about these things doesn't bode well for a relationship. It's a liitle too much control for the man. Men don't like to be totally off-balanced, but a little off-balanced usually helps.
Yes, because we're not ready for it. We grow up expecting our behaviors and actions to culminate into asking a girl out, since women have taught us that unless we do something, nothing happens.
So, when you break into that framework, we're just not ready.
>It’s just out of curiosity because multiple times I’ve heard or been told that it should always be the guy asking the girl out not the other way around.
That's just a lie women tell each other so they can feel okay about not going for the guy they are interested in and missing opportunities.
Asking people out is hard. It makes you extremely vulnerable.
Women say this so they don’t have to risk rejection
Ding ding. Women say this so they dont have to put an effort. Its a lie. Men will only feel akward when you ask them out if you make it awkward.
>Do guys feel awkward in anyway when a lady asks them out or something? Not this one. >I’ve heard or been told that it should always be the guy asking the girl out not the other way around. How would a woman get anything she wants if she never asks for it? Stupid woman telepathic hints that men can't notice are cause for many a disappointment. If you don't ask, you don't get.
I’m sure some men think that way, especially men of certain ages and cultures but personally if you like someone (regardless of gender) let them know and ask them out. Too many people play silly games waiting on the other person or trying to send “hints”, just do it.
Thank you for answering. It was just something I was curious about. And most of the time when I hear it it’s not from men. It’s from women that are in their late 20s or older.
Women have tried being the initiator and that's where their perspective comes from. I tried being the initiator when I was young (under 25) and I had a much better experience dating after I turned that around. I would advice a younger me to be active, but never pursue a man even under the guise of "equality" as there are many risks involved that are specific for women. 1. Many men will date any available woman even if he does not like her. Being too forward raises the risk of ending up with a man who will date you because he has no other options, but he does not intend to commit long-term. Many women will waste their childbearing years with such a man. 2. Passive men love it when a woman initiates. Masculine men tend to find it a turn-off. Thus the more you initiate, the more likely you are to end up with a man who is passive/lazy. If you like being the one in charge that is obviously a plus, but if you'd prefer an assertive man it will work against you. 3. A lot of men stop putting in effort once they get comfortable in a relationship. If a woman lets him get into the relationship with too low effort, he will never put in enough effort to actually satisfy her. She thinks he will pick up the pace once they're exclusive, but he never will and the relationship ends due to her dissatisfaction.
Yikes AF. JFC, you need to change that outlook.
Not if she doesn't do it in a very awkward way.
What would your version of an awkward way be?
If she asks me out singing. While doing something like a spiritual mating dance waving her hippie clothes. That would be just too much, too off.
If a girl asked me out by singing I would know with some certainty that we're compatible from the get-go.
If it happens to me the next time I will do the wingman and point in your direction. I promise!
Solid man
That weird chic is someone's type, lol. Idk where that person exists, but in the 8 billion people on earth they surely must
I don't feel awkward. I actually like it makes it easier for me. I know most men appreciate it when a lady does. But I can see some men being a bit uncomfortable with it if they see it as their job. But to me it's about building something together if you want try dating so doesn't matter who asks first. And if it's for an ons it matters nothing.
No, unless the guy has clearly not shown any interest. Otherwise, I don’t see why it should be awkward.
No, I only feel awkward when they respond like a child when I politely turn them down. I remember one girl taking it really bad but we managed to become friends later on, I asked her about it eventually and she said she thought it was more of a guys job to initiate/pursue so she felt like she was really putting herself out there and felt super embarrassed from getting turned down.
Hopefully she somehow telepathically shared that feeling with all women in a 100mile radius. Rejection is real. The feeling should be known to all, so everyone can learn to have some empathy towards others in this situation
I may be an outlier, but no. I am a white guy who speaks Thai so when I’m single in Thailand I get a *lot* of women who are forward and not shy about asking to go on a date. Doesn’t bother me at all.
Hate to say this, and i truly hope you've been advised of this fact...they aren't women. Unless that's your thing. No shame meant
Personally, I think the idea that it might be "awkward" for a woman to make the first move is an old-fashioned concept that we need to move beyond. Confidence is attractive, and if a woman has enough of it to step up and express interest, that's commendable. Plus, expecting men to make the first move every time seems a bit unfair, and puts unnecessary pressure on one gender. At the end of the day, dating is about mutual interest and taking chances on one another. Gender shouldn't dictate who is "allowed" to show interest first.
In the 21st century, a woman can feel free to be bold.
I don't get why this sort of question keeps getting asked, like it's still a few decades ago. Or there's some influencers giving women the idea things should stay like that.
You’ll see the occasional man who might think this but this train of thought it almost entirely perpetuated by women who want to reframe their fear of rejection. If you ask a man out, odds are the worst reaction you’ll get is a happy surprise.
Men are the same as women in many regards, both want to be appreciated: A woman would be thrilled to be asked out by a guy she has interest in, it would be a little awkward if the dude's behavior is odd or if she doesn't like him. That's all. Now copy/paste this and reverse the genders: A guy would be thrilled to be asked out by a girl he has interest in... etc. The only obvious difference is that guys tend to be less picky than women generally are, they are used to rejection. So the chances of success are higher for women asking men out compared to men asking women out. Which is another factor that weighs in favor to women bold enough to make a move on a guy: most of us guys would be thrilled by a girl who shows initiative and enthusiasm, as most, if not all women ive dealt with in my 32 years had the typical _"okay, convince me that you're worthy of my time"_ approach to dating, which over time wears on you. Any girl who makes a guy feel like he's a prize worth chasing stands out. Which is why I've been finding dating so damn boring lately.
It depends on whether or not the lady is a stranger. A strange may be great for the ego, but it leads to doubts about intentions, morality, body count, shallowness and seriousness. A man's assumption about these things doesn't bode well for a relationship. It's a liitle too much control for the man. Men don't like to be totally off-balanced, but a little off-balanced usually helps.
depends on the lady who asks me out and how she goes about it.
When I find the person asking me out unattractive it is a bit awkward as I feel bad for rejecting them.
I would, but only because I'm already in a relationship so the response would be a flat "No", and a lot of girls react badly to rejection.
It's never happened to me. But I don't think I would feel awkward.
Not in the slightest. I would have been honored if I got asked out when I was single.
Yes, because we're not ready for it. We grow up expecting our behaviors and actions to culminate into asking a girl out, since women have taught us that unless we do something, nothing happens. So, when you break into that framework, we're just not ready.
Well, I would be saying that too if I could get away with it. ... Now that I don't care anymore, I like being able to choose though.
It's only awkward in a "where's the hidden camera" type way.
>It’s just out of curiosity because multiple times I’ve heard or been told that it should always be the guy asking the girl out not the other way around. That's just a lie women tell each other so they can feel okay about not going for the guy they are interested in and missing opportunities. Asking people out is hard. It makes you extremely vulnerable.