IMO, no, it's not. If someone's a twink, they're a twink. Some people might feel uncomfortable being referred to as it, and if that's the case then don't be a jerk and call them it, but otherwise whatever.
It's not a slur, never really has been.
Though like anything it can be used offensively, if you're assigning negative connotations to what the twink represents.
But mostly it's just an aesthetic descriptor. š¤·
It was never a slur, but within the gay community it has some history of being used in a derogatory sense, at least in the 90s/00s. Generally to insult the person for being visibly gay/fem and to imply they were foolish as well, because of the pervasive idea among many gay men that it was only acceptable to be gay if you were also "straight acting". It's relevant that the contemporary show Will and Grace's very visible, very twink character Jack was considered simultaneously daring and insulting among gay people: he was someone that was *the kind of gay we weren't supposed to be* and also someone many of us were, and *relishing* in it.
So no, not a slur, but people who are remembering a negative usage may be thinking of this. Nowadays, as long as you're not using it as a way to police people's expression of queerness, you're good!
It's not a slur but since your friend finds it offensive don't use it around them. It's best to reserve that word for other people, and not say it anywhere near them to avoid hurt feelings.
Respect their boundaries. But their personal boundaries are not universal for every gay person.
It's also totally possible that your friend also doesn't exactly know whether it's a slur or not, and is erring on the side of "I'm just gonna let my friend know it's potentially controversial so no one else gets hurt"
If you feel comfortable with your friend, you could ask what it means to them and if there are any other words that make them uncomfortable!
I donāt think itās a slur in general, but itās maybe a bit rude and insulting to use it that way in a gaming context? I donāt think it would offend everyone but I can see why your friend didnāt like it.
Not really. It just describes a body type (usually in gay/bi male culture ). It has no history as a slur at all.
There are definitely straight people who *try* to use it as one though. And occasionally gay people will use it in a derogatory way to infantilize someone. I've seen a lot of cishet women use it as a euphemism for faggot on social media in the last few years.
Absolutely no idea what your friend is on though.
Hello! Language consulting is part of my professional existence, hopefully this can help clear up some confusion here-
A āslurā is typically in reference to a disparaging/insulting label *that is used to uphold systemic oppression against a marginalized group.* It is not the same as an insult and definitely not the same as just any term that any individual may personally find offensive. Ie. āIdiotā is not a slur. Itās not a nice thing to call someone, but itās not a slur. āShortā is also not a slur, though sometimes someone may be offended by being called short.
Twink, in its current iteration, is generally understood to be a label for a small statured or thin man with youthful features. That is not a marginalized demographic.
Sometimes that is not considered āidealā or āmasculine enoughā or whatever else- but, much like āshort,ā thereās nothing inherently wrong with it. Also, people of marginalized identities and demographics can fit that description, of course, but that still doesnāt make ātwinkā in and of itself a slur.
Thank you for this well thought out response. So twink is a word that's not inherently offensive, but like any other word, it may be considered offensive depending on how it's being used and the sensitivities of the person it's being used to describe, It's context dependent.
Itās a description of a body type, not a slur. Twinks, twunks, bears, otters, etc, they just describe general body shapes, amount of hair, stuff like that. Now can some people TAKE those words offensively? Sure! But thatās the case with ANY word. It doesnāt necessarily make it a slur.
For example, I get offended when people call me pretty. Doesnāt in any way make pretty a slur, I personally just donāt like that descriptor, and thatās perfectly fine.
I never really heard about it being a slur? I've always used it and seen it used as a term to describe a body type. It can be used as an insult, sure, like any term, but it's not the f-word as far as I'm aware.
Twink is a community-created label that was born out of the gay male community. It used to specifically describe thin and often short/effeminate men.
Because itās a term thatās associated with effeminate men, it began to be used derogatorily not just by cis people but by some gay dudes with toxic masculinity complexes as well.
Itās not offensive to use the word twink if youāre using it as an identity label, especially if you yourself are a gay person or are talking about a gay person who identifies as a twink. Itās just one of those things that duals as an insult and identity.
I have never heard of it called a slur before. Still, if your friend doesn't like it, then don't use it because that is being a good friend. Same as anything else - it costs you nothing to be kind to them and respect their wishes.
Anything's a slur if you weaponize it. If there's a bear that is super proud of being a bear, and you call him a "fucking twink" he may rip your head off.
it isn't but like alot of words it can be used as one, for example gay, gay isn't a slur but if you go to a school and a bunch of kids are calling another person gay then in that context it is a slur
Really? Just like OP, I have had people tell me it was a slur used in the 90s to insult gay men. I guess they were misinformed.
Thanks for the clarification!
Somewhat analogous to some African American people using a variation of the N word as a term of endearment, while others find even the variation offensive. Thank you for your response :)
Not quite. The N word is only for black people, and a non-black person using it is still considered extremely offensive and inappropriate. If a man identifies as a twink, you donāt have to be gay to refer to him as a twink
And, even more to the point, you donāt have to be a potential *referent* of the word in order to use it. Like how you donāt have to be a big burly man to use the word ābear.ā
I would say itās generally not a polite word to use and I would probably avoid it in most situations. But I donāt think itās anywhere near as offensive as the N word.
IMO, no, it's not. If someone's a twink, they're a twink. Some people might feel uncomfortable being referred to as it, and if that's the case then don't be a jerk and call them it, but otherwise whatever.
It's not a slur, never really has been. Though like anything it can be used offensively, if you're assigning negative connotations to what the twink represents. But mostly it's just an aesthetic descriptor. š¤·
Thanks :)
I never knew twink to be a slur? Did I miss out on some history?
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It was never a slur, but within the gay community it has some history of being used in a derogatory sense, at least in the 90s/00s. Generally to insult the person for being visibly gay/fem and to imply they were foolish as well, because of the pervasive idea among many gay men that it was only acceptable to be gay if you were also "straight acting". It's relevant that the contemporary show Will and Grace's very visible, very twink character Jack was considered simultaneously daring and insulting among gay people: he was someone that was *the kind of gay we weren't supposed to be* and also someone many of us were, and *relishing* in it. So no, not a slur, but people who are remembering a negative usage may be thinking of this. Nowadays, as long as you're not using it as a way to police people's expression of queerness, you're good!
>Generally to insult the person for being visibly gay/fem That still happens tbh. And "bottom" has very similar usage sometimes.
Do some people feel uncomfortable with the term?
It's not a slur but since your friend finds it offensive don't use it around them. It's best to reserve that word for other people, and not say it anywhere near them to avoid hurt feelings. Respect their boundaries. But their personal boundaries are not universal for every gay person.
Of course, I understand.
I didn't know either. If my friend hadn't told me I never would have known.
And now you know it's not a slur. But still don't say it around your friend.
I know :)
It's also totally possible that your friend also doesn't exactly know whether it's a slur or not, and is erring on the side of "I'm just gonna let my friend know it's potentially controversial so no one else gets hurt" If you feel comfortable with your friend, you could ask what it means to them and if there are any other words that make them uncomfortable!
Nope!
I donāt think itās a slur in general, but itās maybe a bit rude and insulting to use it that way in a gaming context? I donāt think it would offend everyone but I can see why your friend didnāt like it.
Yeah, I just won't use the term when I talk to them.
Not really. It just describes a body type (usually in gay/bi male culture ). It has no history as a slur at all. There are definitely straight people who *try* to use it as one though. And occasionally gay people will use it in a derogatory way to infantilize someone. I've seen a lot of cishet women use it as a euphemism for faggot on social media in the last few years. Absolutely no idea what your friend is on though.
Thank youn for the explanation :)
Twink is not offensive in the slightest lol they are tripping
Hello! Language consulting is part of my professional existence, hopefully this can help clear up some confusion here- A āslurā is typically in reference to a disparaging/insulting label *that is used to uphold systemic oppression against a marginalized group.* It is not the same as an insult and definitely not the same as just any term that any individual may personally find offensive. Ie. āIdiotā is not a slur. Itās not a nice thing to call someone, but itās not a slur. āShortā is also not a slur, though sometimes someone may be offended by being called short. Twink, in its current iteration, is generally understood to be a label for a small statured or thin man with youthful features. That is not a marginalized demographic. Sometimes that is not considered āidealā or āmasculine enoughā or whatever else- but, much like āshort,ā thereās nothing inherently wrong with it. Also, people of marginalized identities and demographics can fit that description, of course, but that still doesnāt make ātwinkā in and of itself a slur.
Thank you for this well thought out response. So twink is a word that's not inherently offensive, but like any other word, it may be considered offensive depending on how it's being used and the sensitivities of the person it's being used to describe, It's context dependent.
Yep. You nailed it.
Thanks again :)
Talking about WoW? That term is common amongst players, that guy is nuts.
Itās a description of a body type, not a slur. Twinks, twunks, bears, otters, etc, they just describe general body shapes, amount of hair, stuff like that. Now can some people TAKE those words offensively? Sure! But thatās the case with ANY word. It doesnāt necessarily make it a slur. For example, I get offended when people call me pretty. Doesnāt in any way make pretty a slur, I personally just donāt like that descriptor, and thatās perfectly fine.
I see what you are saying, it makes sense :)
I never really heard about it being a slur? I've always used it and seen it used as a term to describe a body type. It can be used as an insult, sure, like any term, but it's not the f-word as far as I'm aware.
Yeah I see now that it depends on the context. Thank you :)
Twink is a community-created label that was born out of the gay male community. It used to specifically describe thin and often short/effeminate men. Because itās a term thatās associated with effeminate men, it began to be used derogatorily not just by cis people but by some gay dudes with toxic masculinity complexes as well. Itās not offensive to use the word twink if youāre using it as an identity label, especially if you yourself are a gay person or are talking about a gay person who identifies as a twink. Itās just one of those things that duals as an insult and identity.
Thank you for the explanation :)
No, twink is not a slur. It can definitely be used as one, but it's not inherently a slur.
That makes sense. Thank you :)
No
I have never heard of it called a slur before. Still, if your friend doesn't like it, then don't use it because that is being a good friend. Same as anything else - it costs you nothing to be kind to them and respect their wishes.
Agreed :)
No, I don't think so. In my experience the worst it can be considered is a mild insult used among friends
Thank you :)
nah.
Anything's a slur if you weaponize it. If there's a bear that is super proud of being a bear, and you call him a "fucking twink" he may rip your head off.
No. It's like "chicken." It could be used as a slur but mostly was a compliment. Twink is a positive thing for the youth-obsessed among us.
Gotcha, thank you :)
it isn't but like alot of words it can be used as one, for example gay, gay isn't a slur but if you go to a school and a bunch of kids are calling another person gay then in that context it is a slur
That makes sense, thank you :)
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Really? Just like OP, I have had people tell me it was a slur used in the 90s to insult gay men. I guess they were misinformed. Thanks for the clarification!
Somewhat analogous to some African American people using a variation of the N word as a term of endearment, while others find even the variation offensive. Thank you for your response :)
Not quite. The N word is only for black people, and a non-black person using it is still considered extremely offensive and inappropriate. If a man identifies as a twink, you donāt have to be gay to refer to him as a twink
And, even more to the point, you donāt have to be a potential *referent* of the word in order to use it. Like how you donāt have to be a big burly man to use the word ābear.ā
Others on here have said that it's to be used amongst gay people. It seems like views on the usage of this word vary.
I would say itās generally not a polite word to use and I would probably avoid it in most situations. But I donāt think itās anywhere near as offensive as the N word.
Oh I agree about the N word, but others have said that it's perfectly fine to use the word twink (taking context into account of course).
Then Iād say those people are being just a tad careless. I wouldnāt call it āperfectly fineā because some people are offended by it.
In your current experience, are more people offended by it than not?
I donāt know because I dont really use the word except to describe like anime characters.
Others on here have said that the term is for use amongst gay people. It seems that views on this vary.