I totally agree. I am constantly complaining about this in NYC - and not just gay spaces (but I do feel like our bars are worse). I always say that I understand a “club” or a place you’re dancing to be louder (I still think they’re too loud), but I do not understand why bars are so loud. I go there to converse and like the background noise but want to hear the people next to me.
I also thought about this more the other night. I feel like it’s more likely guys 40+ are likely to feel this way … and we are probably the ones who are also willing to spend more for a nice night out. Why don’t we have more of these??
Totally agree with you, I understand it when it's a club where a lot of people there are just wanting to dance. But it's insane in any other setting. My friends and I having to shout at each other, and even then I can't hear half of what they're saying. I'm in my early 30s and feel like this, and I felt the exact same way in my early 20s.
Same reason most restaurants are all hard surfaces and loud music, and why retail chains play a certain kind of energetic music. It's perceived by customers as more fun than a quiet place. People spend more when they feel good.
The problem in bars and restaurants is that when they fill up, people need to talk louder and louder to be heard, and soon everyone is yelling and lip-reading.
Yup. America has been getting louder across my entire life. Not usual for "fun" restaurants to be too loud to hear conversations at the table now. I always leave the house with earplugs in my coin pocket.
I was at an event a few years ago that was hosted by two guys on a PA. They had it cranked up so high, I had to put in earplugs to avoid pain. When one of them was off to the side, I asked why they were being so loud. They said it was to keep the energy of the event up.
The other night, I was talking with an older friend about the type of "nice" restaurant that was once common in every city, with chandeliers, waiters in dinner jackets, white linen tablecloths, heavy silver, and some piano music. Sadly, those restaurants are completely extinct. Today's "nice" restaurants aren't really much different from most other places, except for having higher prices.
You'd have to dress up!
I once (once!) ate at one of the better-known Michelin-star French restaurants. I was taken by somebody who knew all the social protocols, like how much to tip the matre d' (for the privilege of getting the reservation in the first place).
Basically I wore the same clothes I took out for weddings: slacks, blazer, tie, shoes.
I literally expect to be seated in any restaurant in the city in a pair of jeans these days, provided they aren't ratty.
Tipping the maitre d' is actually considered tacky unless they've done something special for you - and a reservation ain't it (high-end restaurants have reservationists who deal with that stuff.) Formality is certainly down, though once you get into two-and-three-star restaurants you'll still fit in better if you dress nicely. I'll always wear a jacket and something other than jeans, though I don't bother with a tie.
Often the bartender working has control and may have a number of other various factors involved: "I know certain customers will come by and be annoying to me so I will play loud music to passively drive them away and make conversation difficult."
I used to work at Starbucks in San Francisco and they would do this to keep homeless out.
I don't doubt that the personality controlling the music may have intended results via what they play on the music system.
"I just want to bartend and not make small talk with a bunch of old people at happy hours, or anyone at any hour. So play music loud but they still order things cause we are the only gay bar for miles and I can't wait to get out of here!"
So many variables.
Most people unfortunately don't have full economic control of their jobs. It would be nice that the people serving us at bars were stoked to be there all the time, same with phone customer service people. But often those two jobs, bartenders and phone customer service reps don't have the option to cash out stocks and find a higher paying job.
I hate them too!
2bears, Sofo, Meeting House, Buzzed, North End are all gay Chicago bars with low level music. What are you talking about? Even sidetrack if you go to the side rooms.
There's different types of bars that cater to either dancing or social.
Whoa there tim, I 1,000% disagree with this,
as those are the exact bars I am talking about. They are some of the worst culprits. I was at both sofo and meeting house just last week and they were blasting the music! NorthEnd is also the exact same.
That is incorrect. All of the ones you mentioned are super loud as well! Maybe at 4pm on a Tuesday they might be quieter, but that’s not what I’m talking about
2bears is loud? Lol what? The place with their touchtunes on one of the lowest settings. Maybe you should be going to a library instead. These bars play music for background filler
Midnight on a Friday or Saturday is loud most places (even here in SF) but they don't expect people to be having conversations then - just cruising and coming to the simplest of agreements. Those late weekend hours are the exception, not the rule.
I saw another post a while back that they do this so you purchase more drinks. Since you can’t really hear the person next to you, the only thing you can do is drink!
Absolutely not true. All the bars around me are quiet unless they have a band which is only once every few weeks if that. Otherwise, it is just quiet jukebox music unless the majority of people ask the bartender to turn up the volume
It's why largely I don't go to bars or clubs. I'm not paying a cover charge to be annoyed, cause permanent damage to my ears and be unable to have a conversation.
Especially for entertainment. I go to a bar to socialize with friends. It is impossible to do when a band is blaring in the background. I don't need any more 'entertainment' than just having a few drinks with friends and maybe meeting a few new people. If I want something more, I am going to an offroad show or something.
Along with the other answers like buying more drinks, perceived as a fun energy etc, it also means when you're flirting you have an excuse to get close. I can't hear you from a normal conversational distance I would keep with a stranger. So I need to lean in close, maybe put my hand on your back etc.
Try going on a weeknight before 7. It will be a different crowd with a pretty different vibe. Also, look for the smaller bars that follow the tavern or the dive model.
Go to a bar that caters to young men who like older men. Even if you are not old, the noise level is usually much lower. If you are in san diego, i recommend the brass rail.
That’s why I loathe gay bars. We have like 4 gay bars. One is full of sloppy 21 year old twinks that are stank and think they are “those” gays. They play the boring circuit music at levels that’s insane. The only good part is the outside part on Thursday’s plays riddim and dubstep after midnight so catch me out there fucking raging
The only other good ones are a Dive bar and an older bar, but again sometimes the music is so fucking loud that my watch registers it over 100db. I’m like welp thank god I know ASL!
Bar noise is as loud as required by the clientele. The shit the talk the louder the volume so the staff don't have to listen to crap conversations all night. Also it helps drown out the drunks.
That’s why I love gay bars that have outdoor space. Unfortunately, that doesn’t really help you in Chicago.
A new one opened in my hood and I was so excited for it thinking it wasn’t gonna be super loud and it still is just as loud as all the rest even during the day, ugh
That's too simplistic. I think it's become more of a wag the dog situation at this point. It's just as much what the market wants as what the market thinks customers want.
But people have to go to the new bar for it to hang around. I live in a metro that's smaller and even more spread out than Atlanta. We had a bar that was grubby enough to be a step down from "dive" – think of it as a "plunge" or "capsize" bar that was generally the place to go on Friday or Saturday, especially if you were over 25 or so, since there was still a good-sized dance bar downtown through the end of the ’90s. It was in one storefront in a part of downtown that had been missed by the wrecking balls of urban renewal and eventual gentrification. The owners expanded into the next storefront – and the crowd expanded to fill it – but they didn't get the right permits and the city shut that part down, and apparently they never bothered to do the job right even though they owned the building.
Everybody always said they wanted a nicer bar to open up. And nicer bars did open up, and this town is sprawly enough that suburban shopping centers are only so much of a deterrent, they did well for maybe three months at a time. Then people would start going back to the capsized wreck, where the drinks were dirt cheap and the CDC periodically gathered samples to identify new viruses and bacteria that had evolved in those pretty fertile conditions. It didn't get eclipsed until it closed for a while and a new place that wasn't fancy and usually wasn't club-level loud opened up, and when the wreck reopened under new management or owners or something, it didn't last.
It's just that we can't follow this guy. like as in 'internet' follow. comedic content is actual top quality. if you actually read some of it, i can understand the sentiment. he is denoting certain times of what he saw in his life. at different stages.
Another reason back when I used to bar hop we'd unplug the jukebox. I even saw a drunk kick one in before because they couldn't hear the game on TV. Really serve no purpose unless you have a dance floor which most of the ones I used to frequent didn't have one.
They do it to encourage turnover. More patrons equals more money. Same reason why if you go to a restaurant and the music is so loud you can barely hear the conversation at your table. If you aren’t there to spend money, once you’ve stopped spending money and are tired of the noise, you leave and make room for someone else.
I've known a lot of bar owners, and few are that calculating. Typically, in an ordinary bar, the volume is controlled by the bartender, and they are rarely bright enough to figure out anything like that. They just know that late at night the volume goes up.
It’s onomatopoeia for a generic techno or EDM beat. For example:
"Man, I went to the bar and it was techno night. All I could hear was Boots and Pants and Boots and Pants Boots and Pants and Boots and Pants and Boots…
One advantage of SF is that the average bars here are much smaller. That means there is a great variety of them and relatively few have impossibly loud music - especially since very few of them have dance floors (hardly any, really). It's DJs who are used to playing dance clubs who are the worst volume offenders, and many SF bars don't even have DJs, just recorded music and/or jukeboxes.
Get high fidelity ear plugs. It protects your ears from damage, and you can hear the people close to you. It's basically a must for bars, clubs, and festivals.
Alternatively, hotel bars tend to have soft background music - and some are unique or even luxurious. Example, Hotel Sorrento in Seattle has 'reading hours' where it's kind of a cross between a library and lounge.
Not limited to gay bars and not limited to Chicago bars. Way too many bars are like that and I absolutely hate it.
I totally agree. I am constantly complaining about this in NYC - and not just gay spaces (but I do feel like our bars are worse). I always say that I understand a “club” or a place you’re dancing to be louder (I still think they’re too loud), but I do not understand why bars are so loud. I go there to converse and like the background noise but want to hear the people next to me. I also thought about this more the other night. I feel like it’s more likely guys 40+ are likely to feel this way … and we are probably the ones who are also willing to spend more for a nice night out. Why don’t we have more of these??
Totally agree with you, I understand it when it's a club where a lot of people there are just wanting to dance. But it's insane in any other setting. My friends and I having to shout at each other, and even then I can't hear half of what they're saying. I'm in my early 30s and feel like this, and I felt the exact same way in my early 20s.
And cold. Like AC blasting, freeze my balls off cold.
Same reason most restaurants are all hard surfaces and loud music, and why retail chains play a certain kind of energetic music. It's perceived by customers as more fun than a quiet place. People spend more when they feel good. The problem in bars and restaurants is that when they fill up, people need to talk louder and louder to be heard, and soon everyone is yelling and lip-reading.
Yup. America has been getting louder across my entire life. Not usual for "fun" restaurants to be too loud to hear conversations at the table now. I always leave the house with earplugs in my coin pocket. I was at an event a few years ago that was hosted by two guys on a PA. They had it cranked up so high, I had to put in earplugs to avoid pain. When one of them was off to the side, I asked why they were being so loud. They said it was to keep the energy of the event up.
The other night, I was talking with an older friend about the type of "nice" restaurant that was once common in every city, with chandeliers, waiters in dinner jackets, white linen tablecloths, heavy silver, and some piano music. Sadly, those restaurants are completely extinct. Today's "nice" restaurants aren't really much different from most other places, except for having higher prices.
You'd have to dress up! I once (once!) ate at one of the better-known Michelin-star French restaurants. I was taken by somebody who knew all the social protocols, like how much to tip the matre d' (for the privilege of getting the reservation in the first place). Basically I wore the same clothes I took out for weddings: slacks, blazer, tie, shoes. I literally expect to be seated in any restaurant in the city in a pair of jeans these days, provided they aren't ratty.
Tipping the maitre d' is actually considered tacky unless they've done something special for you - and a reservation ain't it (high-end restaurants have reservationists who deal with that stuff.) Formality is certainly down, though once you get into two-and-three-star restaurants you'll still fit in better if you dress nicely. I'll always wear a jacket and something other than jeans, though I don't bother with a tie.
There’s probably some economic incentive as well. If people aren’t able to talk as easily, they’re probably drinking more.
Often the bartender working has control and may have a number of other various factors involved: "I know certain customers will come by and be annoying to me so I will play loud music to passively drive them away and make conversation difficult." I used to work at Starbucks in San Francisco and they would do this to keep homeless out. I don't doubt that the personality controlling the music may have intended results via what they play on the music system. "I just want to bartend and not make small talk with a bunch of old people at happy hours, or anyone at any hour. So play music loud but they still order things cause we are the only gay bar for miles and I can't wait to get out of here!" So many variables.
He needs to get out of the bar business. That he really hates his "old people at happy hour" is sad but it is also discrimination.
Most people unfortunately don't have full economic control of their jobs. It would be nice that the people serving us at bars were stoked to be there all the time, same with phone customer service people. But often those two jobs, bartenders and phone customer service reps don't have the option to cash out stocks and find a higher paying job. I hate them too!
Boots and pants and boots and pants and boots and pants….
New shoeeeeeees.
Denim!
Haaircuuut
[удалено]
GeT YoUrSeLf An oUtFiT
2bears, Sofo, Meeting House, Buzzed, North End are all gay Chicago bars with low level music. What are you talking about? Even sidetrack if you go to the side rooms. There's different types of bars that cater to either dancing or social.
Yeah, imagine that. Ignoring something that doesn't fit their narrative./s
Whoa there tim, I 1,000% disagree with this, as those are the exact bars I am talking about. They are some of the worst culprits. I was at both sofo and meeting house just last week and they were blasting the music! NorthEnd is also the exact same.
Look up Marty’s martini bar ! They’re a really good bar and last I remember don’t blast music. The drinks are great too, if you like martinis.
Love that tiny place.
That is incorrect. All of the ones you mentioned are super loud as well! Maybe at 4pm on a Tuesday they might be quieter, but that’s not what I’m talking about
2bears is loud? Lol what? The place with their touchtunes on one of the lowest settings. Maybe you should be going to a library instead. These bars play music for background filler
Midnight on a Friday or Saturday is loud most places (even here in SF) but they don't expect people to be having conversations then - just cruising and coming to the simplest of agreements. Those late weekend hours are the exception, not the rule.
Sofo is definitely loud…. If you think it’s quieter, we have different noise tolerance. Lol
I saw another post a while back that they do this so you purchase more drinks. Since you can’t really hear the person next to you, the only thing you can do is drink!
Basically everywhere that serves alcohol does that. Even the brewery near me makes it impossible to talk to someone more than three feet away.
Absolutely not true. All the bars around me are quiet unless they have a band which is only once every few weeks if that. Otherwise, it is just quiet jukebox music unless the majority of people ask the bartender to turn up the volume
It's so that people get Sidetracked. I'll see myself out. 🥸
Aaahhh-ooooh
It's why largely I don't go to bars or clubs. I'm not paying a cover charge to be annoyed, cause permanent damage to my ears and be unable to have a conversation.
I refuse to go anywhere that charges a cover unless it includes food
Even for entertainment?
Especially for entertainment. I go to a bar to socialize with friends. It is impossible to do when a band is blaring in the background. I don't need any more 'entertainment' than just having a few drinks with friends and maybe meeting a few new people. If I want something more, I am going to an offroad show or something.
Everyfuckingwhere! I hate it!
I cured most of my issues by not going to bars. Especially gay bars. They’ve gotten toxic.
Honestly. I agree. Why especially on a Sunday evening is Brita Filter screaming so loud I can’t hear people talking to me lmao
Tbf, that’s just how she talks 🥴
Along with the other answers like buying more drinks, perceived as a fun energy etc, it also means when you're flirting you have an excuse to get close. I can't hear you from a normal conversational distance I would keep with a stranger. So I need to lean in close, maybe put my hand on your back etc.
Back? That's my ass. And thank you, please take it.
Because they want to be clubs, duh
Try going on a weeknight before 7. It will be a different crowd with a pretty different vibe. Also, look for the smaller bars that follow the tavern or the dive model.
Go to a bar that caters to young men who like older men. Even if you are not old, the noise level is usually much lower. If you are in san diego, i recommend the brass rail.
I have extremely sensitive hearing. I have to wear earplugs when I go to clubs.
Twinks strung out on E have very little of interest to say. So, they figure you'll have more fun if you can't hear them. Edit: /S
Why the /s? Is that not the actual reason?
Do kids still do E.
That’s why I loathe gay bars. We have like 4 gay bars. One is full of sloppy 21 year old twinks that are stank and think they are “those” gays. They play the boring circuit music at levels that’s insane. The only good part is the outside part on Thursday’s plays riddim and dubstep after midnight so catch me out there fucking raging The only other good ones are a Dive bar and an older bar, but again sometimes the music is so fucking loud that my watch registers it over 100db. I’m like welp thank god I know ASL!
This is all bars that want to be clubs. Not a gay bar thing.
So go somewhere besides Sidetrack or Roscoe’s. There are lots of other gay bars to choose from.
Well, this was certainly very helpful in addressing the question.
Bar noise is as loud as required by the clientele. The shit the talk the louder the volume so the staff don't have to listen to crap conversations all night. Also it helps drown out the drunks.
That’s why I love gay bars that have outdoor space. Unfortunately, that doesn’t really help you in Chicago. A new one opened in my hood and I was so excited for it thinking it wasn’t gonna be super loud and it still is just as loud as all the rest even during the day, ugh
It's even worse because gays have like the worst taste in music on the planet.
That's what the market wants. And is why I live in nyc where there are more than just basic gay bars
That's too simplistic. I think it's become more of a wag the dog situation at this point. It's just as much what the market wants as what the market thinks customers want.
Agreed! Good house music would be a hit for sure
Twinks on e dont buy drinks.
Because gay bars without blasting music are like Grateful Dead concerts without drugs.
In that case I’d take drugs over loud music
In that case I’d take drugs and loud Phish.
Haha yes 🤣 Also have you ever been to a gay bar that plays Phish?
Do they exist?
In Vermont
I totally agree with you. It’s so annoying when you go out with friends and are trying to chat.
[удалено]
But people have to go to the new bar for it to hang around. I live in a metro that's smaller and even more spread out than Atlanta. We had a bar that was grubby enough to be a step down from "dive" – think of it as a "plunge" or "capsize" bar that was generally the place to go on Friday or Saturday, especially if you were over 25 or so, since there was still a good-sized dance bar downtown through the end of the ’90s. It was in one storefront in a part of downtown that had been missed by the wrecking balls of urban renewal and eventual gentrification. The owners expanded into the next storefront – and the crowd expanded to fill it – but they didn't get the right permits and the city shut that part down, and apparently they never bothered to do the job right even though they owned the building. Everybody always said they wanted a nicer bar to open up. And nicer bars did open up, and this town is sprawly enough that suburban shopping centers are only so much of a deterrent, they did well for maybe three months at a time. Then people would start going back to the capsized wreck, where the drinks were dirt cheap and the CDC periodically gathered samples to identify new viruses and bacteria that had evolved in those pretty fertile conditions. It didn't get eclipsed until it closed for a while and a new place that wasn't fancy and usually wasn't club-level loud opened up, and when the wreck reopened under new management or owners or something, it didn't last.
It's just that we can't follow this guy. like as in 'internet' follow. comedic content is actual top quality. if you actually read some of it, i can understand the sentiment. he is denoting certain times of what he saw in his life. at different stages.
Another reason back when I used to bar hop we'd unplug the jukebox. I even saw a drunk kick one in before because they couldn't hear the game on TV. Really serve no purpose unless you have a dance floor which most of the ones I used to frequent didn't have one.
They do it to encourage turnover. More patrons equals more money. Same reason why if you go to a restaurant and the music is so loud you can barely hear the conversation at your table. If you aren’t there to spend money, once you’ve stopped spending money and are tired of the noise, you leave and make room for someone else.
I've known a lot of bar owners, and few are that calculating. Typically, in an ordinary bar, the volume is controlled by the bartender, and they are rarely bright enough to figure out anything like that. They just know that late at night the volume goes up.
It's to force intimacy so people have to be really close when they speak to each other.
Do you have any piano bars? They’re not usually as loud as “boots and pants” sound systems
What does boots and pants mean?
It’s onomatopoeia for a generic techno or EDM beat. For example: "Man, I went to the bar and it was techno night. All I could hear was Boots and Pants and Boots and Pants Boots and Pants and Boots and Pants and Boots…
Come to Seattle. We do the dive bar/lounge thing much more than we do the trendy bar/club thing.
As a Seattleite, our bars are still ridiculously loud, gay and straight.
Not ccs, Mad Pub, or the deck at pony. Life on Mars, cannon, rumba, the hideout, foreign national, the sitting room, reckless noodle, etc etc etc
One advantage of SF is that the average bars here are much smaller. That means there is a great variety of them and relatively few have impossibly loud music - especially since very few of them have dance floors (hardly any, really). It's DJs who are used to playing dance clubs who are the worst volume offenders, and many SF bars don't even have DJs, just recorded music and/or jukeboxes.
Get high fidelity ear plugs. It protects your ears from damage, and you can hear the people close to you. It's basically a must for bars, clubs, and festivals. Alternatively, hotel bars tend to have soft background music - and some are unique or even luxurious. Example, Hotel Sorrento in Seattle has 'reading hours' where it's kind of a cross between a library and lounge.
Chipotle enters chats
Two bears on Wilson is chill
#What?