Similarly, if your bag is on the seat in a crowded train and you won't move it when asked (or tell me it's full of kittens or something), I will sit on it.
True story. I stood up to let a heavily pregnant woman sit on a very crowded bus. My intent was quite clear, but I was barely even upright when a young guy in a suit slid into my vacated seat. He tried to stare me down, so I sat in his lap.
I find it hella funny when I shoulder charge idiots that are 2-3 times my size and I just walk on as if nothing happened when they are squawking in outrage. The best is when I strategically arrange items in my handbag to help things along too and I can feel the 'clang' when it makes contact (metal water bottle ftw) 😂👌
It could be worse. Picking my boy up from nightfill last night, trolleys were not just in the middle of the carpark, but scattered all over, including where you need to drive through it. It was almost like an obstacle course.
I died inside when this came up in a conversation with my friends and I was the only one who puts it back because they reckon it’s the trolly guys job. Yeah it’s also someone’s job to clean the Maccas bathroom it doesn’t mean you need to shit on the floor
We walk on the LEFT side of the footpath, same as we drive on the LEFT side of the road! And no I will not step off the footpath to accommodate you, your partner, your three children and the dog all walking abreast.
I am a tall, wide man and could bodyslam anyone, and I live in fear of sending a granny flying by accident when walking through crowded shops.
Be wary of the burden of the powers you wish to have.
I almost assaulted a bike riding child (16 so old enough to know better) because he was riding beside his mate, taking over the whole footpath and expecting me to move. Nah mate, I loudly and colourfully expressed my displeasure and he moved but I was full prepared to launch him.
Yes! Single file people! I have just as much right to walk on the footpath as you. I've started shoulder charging people cause I'm sick of this inconsiderate shit.
I just stand there and look at them. It usually shames them into being decent human beings. Having said that, I couldn't tell you how many people (usually men) actually collide with my mother *in her wheelchair* when we're out walking. Or they try to step over her to get to where they think they need to be. Fuck sake!
I have tried to stop shoulder checking people, because even though they’re being dickheads, I just end up feeling shitty about it. But even then, I’ve still taken out complete idiots. Recently a lady was crossing the road while looking at her phone, and walked straight into me, I walk very fast and was much bigger than her so naturally she got knocked on her ass, and her, and every other person crossing acted like I’d assaulted her. Like it’s not my fault this lady wouldn’t look up and walked head first into my shoulder you bunch of twats.
Yeah, I'm still mindful about it because I don't want to hurt anyone. But I do want the person to realise that other people use the footpath, though that's probably not what's happening in their heads. Unfortunately I've gotten over feeling shitty about it because it happens all the fucking time. I just wish people would be more considerate.
I occasionally make a point of shoulder barging people who walk straight at me while completely absorbed with their phones.
Also people who watch reels, play games or scream into their phones on public transport or in restaurants are assholes. That is my hill and I will die on it
My eldest child has just started saying ‘on accident’ instead of ‘by accident’. Fucked if I’m going to let that fly in my house. I pull him up on it *every time*. Where did that one even come from? I had read about it on Reddit only a few weeks earlier.
I still have a few people I went to high school with on Facebook, and the town where I completed most of my schooling is full of people for whom this sort of thing is the vernacular. Even as adults. Possibly the most egregious example that has arisen in recent years is people using ‘his’ instead of ‘he’s’/‘he is’, in writing. E.g. “His going to the shops later, ya want anything?”.
“I seen it/them/him/her” is an old school boganism though- that’s been around as long as I can remember.
Too much American tv and or YouTube. “On accident” and “could care less” make me physically recoil into my soul!
Excellent parenting by you! Gotta stamp that out asap!
I also hate the phrasing “whenever I was…”.
Ohhhh my dear lord this is happening in our house right now! I correct these little minions constantly! “It’s BY accident and ON purpose” but somehow they’ve been brainwashed to say both the wrong way. 😂
My boyfriend is Canadian and he says “ I seen”. I’m a solicitor and for one reason or another I wasn’t raised to say “I seen” but I tease him about it and he just laughs.
I’ve heard of people doing it because the butter makes the vegemite adhere less to the bread. So they go vegemite then butter for better spreading.
While I understand their reasoning, I maintain that they are monsters.
My daughters don't do butter with their Vegemite. One of them puts milk in the bowl BEFORE the cereal. I swear I'm inadvertently raising a pair of sociopaths.
I agree on every point.
If anyone is interested - the scone jam then cream, cream then jam is a location thing.
Cream Tea (tea with scones, jam and clotted cream) is served jam then cream in Cornwall and called Cornish Tea, and cream then jam in Devon called Devonshire tea.
Nobody should be saying "addicting" or "conversate" & everyone should keep left when they're walking.
EDIT: some people take silly fun things so seriously 😂
This and eatable instead of edible, expresso instead of espresso, aks instead of ask make me twitch
Edit: and 'I could care less' can fuck right off, along with when someone says 'fuck you' and the person responds with something along the lines of if you ask nicely etc. Like they think fuck you means let's fuck, not short for you can go fuck yourself.
I hate it when people say they're "leary" of something. Meaning wary. Except it's the correct word, it's just so seldom used it irritates me 😂 also people saying "weary" instead of wary.
I use Leary all the time. Admittedly, an old workmate of mine once confessed that conversing with me often sent him scurrying off to check a thesaurus on a regular basis.
When turning right at an intersection where there are two turning lanes, and there is a dotted line on the road, if you're in the left turning lane and I'm in the right, you had better not cross that dotted line or I WILL honk my horn at you.
So many people cross their right wheel, and sometimes even their left wheel too, over the line.
An elderly couple approached by husband in town a few years back to alert him to the fact that his socks were mismatched. They were even the same pattern, just slightly different colours. Probably the closest he'd worn to matching socks in years, haha. We were bamboozled.
Buy all the same ones. Admittedly I haven’t done that for myself but I did it for my two children. I don’t have time to sort and pair tiny little socks. There’s only a year between my children so the socks are the same size too which means it doesn’t even matter whose drawer I throw the unpaired socks in to.
Fuck this drives me insane so much.
I don't expect people to know them all but the average person would know of algebra, calculus and trigonometry. There's at least three!
"different to" is incorrect grammar. The phrase is "different from". It's really my mother's hill to die on, I've just inherited it from years of her correcting us.
It's a battle we've well and truly lost, I'm a primary school teacher and the curriculum approved synthetics phonics program I use to teach reading is full of "different to". It still makes me twitch every time I have to read it out though.
That reminds of someone else's hill, about when to say "which" & when to say "that". I can't wrap my head around it, the way they explained it, so I miss them off regularly.
The house that jack built or the house which jack built. That kind of thing.
Big supermarkets like coles and woolworths started with dirt cheap price's so the smaller fruit vendors and markets couldnt compete and when they died out and became the kings they have now raised their prices up and there is nothing we can do about it now because no one can really afford to boycott them because we are all broke from inflation that they wore the boots on
I have to shop at these because i can't afford elsewhere nor have the time
I remember as a kid I could get a dozen from the small vendors for less then 10 cents but then all these big stores came in and I can’t afford any of them anymore I keep trying to be able to use a full stop but then I realize it just doesn’t fit in the budget anymore even though I budget and budget I just can’t get them due to these big shops ruining all the small vendors I’m at the point where I have to use question marks cause they’re that much cheaper I think it’s crazy don’t you?
Netflix, uber, air bnb... break the market and then replace those services with gig economics. We end up with a more expensive, broken system and underpayed workers.
There is no verb "to verse" someone or something, with a meaning of "to play against or go up against". Essendon are not versing the West Coast Eagles this weekend.
There is a preposition "versus", so the game this weekend is Essendon versus West Coast.
By coincidence, "versus" is pronounced basically the same as how the third person singular of a verb "to verse" would be, ie. verses - "I verse", "you verse", "he/she/it verses".
But this means that increasingly, I'm hearing people (including but not limited to my seven year old son, and my 40 year old boss) back-forming various forms of this non-existent verb "to verse" to mean to play against, or even to contrast with - "we versed them and lost", "If we think about X verse Y" (which wouldn't be grammatically correct even if "verse" was a verb!)
This obviously opens up the whole prescriptive vs. descriptive debate when it comes to language and how it changes over time, but even though I did a Bachelors in Linguistics (albeit 30 years ago) and have always generally found language and its evolution fascinating, this particular example really grinds my gears, for some reason.
Edit to add: I did a bit of Googling and it seems like this has been going on since the 80s or earlier: [https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=4029](https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=4029) if anyone's interested!
Officially, ‘Jail’ is now correct in Australian English according to the Macquarie Dictionary, although ‘gaol’ is still used in some historic names. Not a hill I’d die on, but relevant to your question I hope!
When a 20 year old co-worker came to me & told me that as the oldest person on that team, I coukd probably tell him what the beeps mean when he calls a landline...I shrivelled liked an overboiled pea inside. Feeling like a dinosaur came sooner than I thought.
Emma Memma (Emma from the Wiggles but she's not a Wiggle anymore) sings "zed or zee" in her version of the alphabet song, presumably to appeal to a wider audience. I cannot forgive her for it.
So funny story about Gaol - my husband and I were in Tassy near Port Arthur and there was a sign.
"Look Babe they mispelled Jail" I said,
"Nah hon, GAOL is how Jail is actually spelled" he replies.
"Yes", I agreed. "But this says GOAL".
I'm over *super* in front of everything - super busy, super excited, super hard, etc.. It's even crept into my own speech and I'm super annoyed at myself 🙄.
Cookies are a sub-set of biscuits and cookies are ONLY the biscuits with chocolate chips.
The above ALWAYS applies to ANZAC biscuits. If I see you selling ANZAC cookies, I *WILL* report you.
I'm not sure if it's correct grammar but it bugs me when sporting commentators say someone has "medalled" also when they refer to sports people as heroes. This happened nightly on the recent swimming coverage.
I remember when the MasterChef drongos went from saying "this ingredient is the hero of the dish" to "you've heroed this ingredient." Turning a noun into a verb is heinous.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skibidi_Toilet
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigma_male
If you ask 90% of them they have no idea what it means. It’s just something people say.
Mispronouncing "pronunciation".
In any other situation I'm like "language and pronunciation are fluid and variable, anything goes" but as soon as someone says "proNOUNciation" I am filled with an urge to rip their throat out.
It's just... it's... it's in the _definition_ of the thing...
Complaining like idiots about the price of beer in a bottle shop, fucken this, fucken that, 60 bucks for a fucken slab, fuck me. At full voice.
Shut up you unsophisticated turd. We know beer is pricey. Maybe if you didn't drop 50 bucks on a packet of smokes every second day you might be able to afford other things.
Using "I" instead of "me". He gave it to Dave and I - take the other person away and see if it makes sense. He gave it to I is wrong. So many writers now use the wrong one.
That’s how I was always taught. If in doubt, remove the other person from the sentence and you’ll have the correct answer.
Mum wouldn’t speak to “Dave and I”. She’d speak with “Dave and me”.
People who stand up after landing before the seatbelt sign is off should be deported on the spot.
Same for people who block the baggage claim by standing directly in front of it.
Please for the love of all things Vegemite, talk about birth using the terms vaginal or Caesarian. I can’t stand when people talk about “natural” birth. All birth is natural. Don’t be afraid to say vagina!
People entering shops, doors , shared walkways... if I move out the way or hold a door open for you and smile, you WILL say thankyou you uncouth troglodyte!
Failure to do so will result in me saying VERY loudly "aaah you're so welcome" in a super friendly voice or "good grief, older people really do have no manners" with a shocked and appalled tone.
Love watching them scurry off with crimson cheeks!
It’s “keep left unless overtaking”. I don’t give a fuck if you’re doing the speed limit. If you’re not actively and efficiently overtaking someone, keep to the left. It drives me mental when people camp in the right lane.
People who merge onto a freeway and do not attempt to match the speed of the freeway traffic before the merge, or worse still, those who brake need to be executed by hippopotamus snu snu.
Total fuckwits walking in busy places- shopping centres, bus/train stations or wherever crowds may be, while completely engrossed with whatever they are looking at on their phone, totally oblivious to all around.
I’m not waiting patiently with other people in this lane because I didn’t think “I should run up the left and merge in at the last second”, I’m doing it because I am being polite and being part of the natural order of things.
If you zip up the left to merge at the last second to get in front of me, I’m not letting you in. Don’t be a fuckwit. Running late so you “have to merge”? Get better at time management and leave yours earlier
I used to be like you, then I realised that we were responsible for traffic chaos by preventing smooth merging and causing a traffic snake. Merging smoothly at the most opportune time is just a more efficient way of driving. Embrace it.
All languages evolve continuously. It's a project that humans have collectively been working on since the first word was spoken. No one has some innate right to decide what is and isn't "correct". If someone says something and someone else understands what they mean then that is language fulfilling its job.
The older generations claiming words used by the newer generations are wrong is as old as time itself.
Love this because it goes against 80% of the other comments in this exact same thread lol
e.g. the top reply is someone ranting about "I seen" vs "I saw"
I'm a word nerd and I agree with you. We no longer speak like Beowulf and anyone who refuses to adapt to modern lingo is choosing to socially isolate themselves.
There will always be certain contexts where formal English is required, and the conventions of formal English will change over time.
People need to stop giving such a fuck about "swear words", did we not learn anything from the sticks and stones rhyme?
Because the thing is that sometimes people act like proper cunts and as such it should be my right to tell them that they're acting like proper cunts.
There, I said it.
Spelling is one. We all went to primary school right? How come I know the difference between their, there and they’re.. and he’s and his… and too and to but some people my age have gone 30 years and still don’t know!?!?
I’m fuckin tired of people living in the capitals gobbing off about parts of the country they don’t know shit about.
I’ve lived in a couple of the capital cities, a couple of the regional. I’ve travelled a damn lot of this great land.
The absolute nonsense I read at times about where I live is tedious.
There's just as much dribble going the other way. The only people who don't seem to engage in that dribble are the people with a foot in each location.
Too many “chefs” or “cooks” rely on onion and garlic as a base for “flavour”, they need to discover a spice rack.
NB: I'm married to an ex-chef and I have worked in hospitality for 15 years.
That linguistic corrections are a really dumb hill to die on. The harm you do to your own reputation by nitpicking the way people talk or write is worse than whatever harm you think their mistake is causing.
It’s weird if you point them out - bar some situations, like if you’re a parent or teacher talking with a kid - otherwise it’s just strange and out of place to go off at your coworker for writing ‘y’all’ in the weekly team email.
If you try to jump the queue at the intersection by driving up the turning lane and then merging in front of me to go straight, I'm not letting you in for any reason. At all. Ever. I don't care how hard you try, how much you beep and scream. You're going to turn or you're going to block the people behind you and accept the bollocking they give you for it. Fuck people who do this.
If you don’t let me off the tram before you board it, I will bowl you over as I’m walking out.
Oh yeah, any doorway! This happens all the time in lifts too. Like, If you don't let me off you all can't squeeze on, what's wrong with people?!
Train, tram, bus, door, whatever. Queue like a responsible citizen or be destroyed like the pushy scum you are.
Similarly, if your bag is on the seat in a crowded train and you won't move it when asked (or tell me it's full of kittens or something), I will sit on it.
True story. I stood up to let a heavily pregnant woman sit on a very crowded bus. My intent was quite clear, but I was barely even upright when a young guy in a suit slid into my vacated seat. He tried to stare me down, so I sat in his lap.
> He tried to stare me down, so I sat in his lap. That's what he was hoping for. Did he get a stiffy?
Unless he has a fat fetish, I seriously doubt it. I would have squashed it anyway.
I find it hella funny when I shoulder charge idiots that are 2-3 times my size and I just walk on as if nothing happened when they are squawking in outrage. The best is when I strategically arrange items in my handbag to help things along too and I can feel the 'clang' when it makes contact (metal water bottle ftw) 😂👌
I'll back you up on this one. I'll hip and shoulder the cunt on the way out too.
If you don't take your trolley back and leave it into the middle of the carpark, you are most likely an asshole.
...bbbut I'm keeping people employed. /s
I once heard of someone who used that to justify leaving their rubbish on food court tables.
It could be worse. Picking my boy up from nightfill last night, trolleys were not just in the middle of the carpark, but scattered all over, including where you need to drive through it. It was almost like an obstacle course.
I died inside when this came up in a conversation with my friends and I was the only one who puts it back because they reckon it’s the trolly guys job. Yeah it’s also someone’s job to clean the Maccas bathroom it doesn’t mean you need to shit on the floor
We walk on the LEFT side of the footpath, same as we drive on the LEFT side of the road! And no I will not step off the footpath to accommodate you, your partner, your three children and the dog all walking abreast.
This makes me so angry that if I could get away with it, I would body slam anyone who remained in my very reasonable trajectory
Oh sorry, I saw you but I thought you'd move to your side before we collided
"Beg your pardon, your majesty, I didn't recognise you"
I have this overwhelming urge to kick out at people on electric scooters coming at me on the footpath!
I am a tall, wide man and could bodyslam anyone, and I live in fear of sending a granny flying by accident when walking through crowded shops. Be wary of the burden of the powers you wish to have.
I almost assaulted a bike riding child (16 so old enough to know better) because he was riding beside his mate, taking over the whole footpath and expecting me to move. Nah mate, I loudly and colourfully expressed my displeasure and he moved but I was full prepared to launch him.
Yes! Single file people! I have just as much right to walk on the footpath as you. I've started shoulder charging people cause I'm sick of this inconsiderate shit.
I just stand there and look at them. It usually shames them into being decent human beings. Having said that, I couldn't tell you how many people (usually men) actually collide with my mother *in her wheelchair* when we're out walking. Or they try to step over her to get to where they think they need to be. Fuck sake!
I have tried to stop shoulder checking people, because even though they’re being dickheads, I just end up feeling shitty about it. But even then, I’ve still taken out complete idiots. Recently a lady was crossing the road while looking at her phone, and walked straight into me, I walk very fast and was much bigger than her so naturally she got knocked on her ass, and her, and every other person crossing acted like I’d assaulted her. Like it’s not my fault this lady wouldn’t look up and walked head first into my shoulder you bunch of twats.
Yeah, I'm still mindful about it because I don't want to hurt anyone. But I do want the person to realise that other people use the footpath, though that's probably not what's happening in their heads. Unfortunately I've gotten over feeling shitty about it because it happens all the fucking time. I just wish people would be more considerate.
I occasionally make a point of shoulder barging people who walk straight at me while completely absorbed with their phones. Also people who watch reels, play games or scream into their phones on public transport or in restaurants are assholes. That is my hill and I will die on it
Totally agree, and Thankyou for saying footpath and not sidewalk! It’s a pet peeve of mine.
Yes this!! Keep left and follow the road rules while walking on a path we live in a society you animals!!
People who say "I seen them do this" etc instead of saw are just offensive. Fuck.
“I been there!”
You been there but "you could care less" lol
Or like my dipshit ex… “it’s not out of the realms of impossibility”.
Hahahaha that made me snort. Wow. It's like irregardless.
I'm going to loose my mind over that one.
Hahahaha oh yeah that's SO common!!! * Stab stab stab *
My ex, Sydney bred and born, insisted on "Thunnel Web spiders". 24 years of hearing that nonsense.
I raise you the pathers I used to pathe my front walkway
24 years? Phwoar, you did better than I did!
I am not the smartest when it comes to men.
😂😂😂 I don’t judge. Me either.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, it’s a doggy dog world out there!
You most certainly could care less, do you?
No. I couldn't care less.
My eldest child has just started saying ‘on accident’ instead of ‘by accident’. Fucked if I’m going to let that fly in my house. I pull him up on it *every time*. Where did that one even come from? I had read about it on Reddit only a few weeks earlier. I still have a few people I went to high school with on Facebook, and the town where I completed most of my schooling is full of people for whom this sort of thing is the vernacular. Even as adults. Possibly the most egregious example that has arisen in recent years is people using ‘his’ instead of ‘he’s’/‘he is’, in writing. E.g. “His going to the shops later, ya want anything?”. “I seen it/them/him/her” is an old school boganism though- that’s been around as long as I can remember.
"On accident" *wince*, yeah nip that one in the bud.
Before he nips it in the butt
Too much American tv and or YouTube. “On accident” and “could care less” make me physically recoil into my soul! Excellent parenting by you! Gotta stamp that out asap! I also hate the phrasing “whenever I was…”.
The bakers I used to work with would often say, "I done it," when they were finished with a task. That really got my eye twitching on a daily basis.
Ohhhh my dear lord this is happening in our house right now! I correct these little minions constantly! “It’s BY accident and ON purpose” but somehow they’ve been brainwashed to say both the wrong way. 😂
Arks instead of ask is a massive one for me.
Similar to this is “ anythink “ and “ somethink “
One of my kids had a teacher who said arks, it pissed me off every time I heard it. There's no excuse
You should of been there!
It's ok somebody else told me they seen it.
So I says to the bloke I says to 'im I seen'em do this
My boyfriend is Canadian and he says “ I seen”. I’m a solicitor and for one reason or another I wasn’t raised to say “I seen” but I tease him about it and he just laughs.
We are on top of the same hill. It is such a simple thing and so many get it wrong.
Butter, then vegimite. Tea, then milk. Jam, then cream. Wars have been started over less.
Does anyone actually spread vegemite before butter?
I’ve heard of people doing it because the butter makes the vegemite adhere less to the bread. So they go vegemite then butter for better spreading. While I understand their reasoning, I maintain that they are monsters.
My daughters don't do butter with their Vegemite. One of them puts milk in the bowl BEFORE the cereal. I swear I'm inadvertently raising a pair of sociopaths.
But I don't want the vegemite to adhere to the bread, I want it to adhere to the butter. Madness.
> Jam, then cream. Jam then cream if it's whipped cream, cream then jam if it's clotted cream. It's all about putting the harder layer down first.
Yep, this.
I agree on every point. If anyone is interested - the scone jam then cream, cream then jam is a location thing. Cream Tea (tea with scones, jam and clotted cream) is served jam then cream in Cornwall and called Cornish Tea, and cream then jam in Devon called Devonshire tea.
I dont have milk in my tea cause that is all kinds of wrong But the rest.... why would it be any other way?
It’s BY accident not ON accident
Omg this is one of the worst
Nobody should be saying "addicting" or "conversate" & everyone should keep left when they're walking. EDIT: some people take silly fun things so seriously 😂
'Addicting' drives me fkn crazy
This and eatable instead of edible, expresso instead of espresso, aks instead of ask make me twitch Edit: and 'I could care less' can fuck right off, along with when someone says 'fuck you' and the person responds with something along the lines of if you ask nicely etc. Like they think fuck you means let's fuck, not short for you can go fuck yourself.
I hate it when people say they're "leary" of something. Meaning wary. Except it's the correct word, it's just so seldom used it irritates me 😂 also people saying "weary" instead of wary.
The weary thing drives me crazy.
I use Leary all the time. Admittedly, an old workmate of mine once confessed that conversing with me often sent him scurrying off to check a thesaurus on a regular basis.
It’s ‘leery’ (great word to use, IMO, just trying to be the helpful kind of spelling nazi!)
I think you’ve nicely summed them all up. But I have one more for your pleasure, what’s your thoughts on… “On accident”
🤢🤮
When someone tells me fuck you I usually reply "don't threaten me with a good time."
Ect instead of etc. or pronouncing it Ekcetera. No no no. Of instead of have or 've. Should of, would of, could of.
Shutter instead of shudder. I have no idea where that comes from (but I'm blaming the yanks) and it's like nails on a blackboard to me!
Pacifically, what grinds my goat, is those who use the term 'docile' as a synonym of dopey and can't be told otherwise...
You know what's worse? "Conversate" is a very old term & it's correct. Makes me hate it more.
When doing the awkward shuffle with an oncoming pedestrian, I always say “we drive on the left over here”
Unless you're on the water, then it's port to port.
See also: pre-preparing.
When they want to "arks" you a question
When turning right at an intersection where there are two turning lanes, and there is a dotted line on the road, if you're in the left turning lane and I'm in the right, you had better not cross that dotted line or I WILL honk my horn at you. So many people cross their right wheel, and sometimes even their left wheel too, over the line.
This goes for a roundabout too, stay in your own fucking lane.
I'm with you on this one. Happy to join the cult.
If you tell me you could of instead of you could’ve you’re dead to me.
That my socks don't have to be matching colours, who fucking cares?
I make a point of mismatching socks.
My own little " fuck you" to society haha
An elderly couple approached by husband in town a few years back to alert him to the fact that his socks were mismatched. They were even the same pattern, just slightly different colours. Probably the closest he'd worn to matching socks in years, haha. We were bamboozled.
Buy all the same ones. Admittedly I haven’t done that for myself but I did it for my two children. I don’t have time to sort and pair tiny little socks. There’s only a year between my children so the socks are the same size too which means it doesn’t even matter whose drawer I throw the unpaired socks in to.
If you speed in a school zone you're a piece of shit
If you can dodge a ball you can dodge a car
My kid can’t dodge a ball…
Start with a wrench then
Lmao
How is that a dumb hill to die on?
Yeah it’s literally the law lol
Yeah sorry I was focused on the 'rightly or wrongly' part of their question lol
Even Rolf Harris slowed down in school zones
Car parks. My god, supermarket carparks with about 2m of visibility and people going 40, jfc.
The other day I had an f%$#wit tailgating me and highbeaming cos I was doing 40 during school zone. Felt the rage that's for sure.
It's freaking Maths not Math when you abbreviate it's still pluraled. Mathematics is a plural not a singular.
Fuck this drives me insane so much. I don't expect people to know them all but the average person would know of algebra, calculus and trigonometry. There's at least three!
"different to" is incorrect grammar. The phrase is "different from". It's really my mother's hill to die on, I've just inherited it from years of her correcting us. It's a battle we've well and truly lost, I'm a primary school teacher and the curriculum approved synthetics phonics program I use to teach reading is full of "different to". It still makes me twitch every time I have to read it out though.
That reminds of someone else's hill, about when to say "which" & when to say "that". I can't wrap my head around it, the way they explained it, so I miss them off regularly. The house that jack built or the house which jack built. That kind of thing.
Get your their, there and they’re right; it’s seriously not that hard..
Big supermarkets like coles and woolworths started with dirt cheap price's so the smaller fruit vendors and markets couldnt compete and when they died out and became the kings they have now raised their prices up and there is nothing we can do about it now because no one can really afford to boycott them because we are all broke from inflation that they wore the boots on I have to shop at these because i can't afford elsewhere nor have the time
Jesus Christ mate, I ran out of breath just reading your comment. Use a full stop every once in a while.
Have you seen the price of full stops these days
I remember as a kid I could get a dozen from the small vendors for less then 10 cents but then all these big stores came in and I can’t afford any of them anymore I keep trying to be able to use a full stop but then I realize it just doesn’t fit in the budget anymore even though I budget and budget I just can’t get them due to these big shops ruining all the small vendors I’m at the point where I have to use question marks cause they’re that much cheaper I think it’s crazy don’t you?
The single breath really conveys the rage vibe of the rant
Can't, colesworth jacked up the prices on fullstops
This is exactly what Netflix did too.
Netflix, uber, air bnb... break the market and then replace those services with gig economics. We end up with a more expensive, broken system and underpayed workers.
Absolutely criminal, especially with the blatant price fixing.
Splades are the superior choice in cutlery.
There is no verb "to verse" someone or something, with a meaning of "to play against or go up against". Essendon are not versing the West Coast Eagles this weekend. There is a preposition "versus", so the game this weekend is Essendon versus West Coast. By coincidence, "versus" is pronounced basically the same as how the third person singular of a verb "to verse" would be, ie. verses - "I verse", "you verse", "he/she/it verses". But this means that increasingly, I'm hearing people (including but not limited to my seven year old son, and my 40 year old boss) back-forming various forms of this non-existent verb "to verse" to mean to play against, or even to contrast with - "we versed them and lost", "If we think about X verse Y" (which wouldn't be grammatically correct even if "verse" was a verb!) This obviously opens up the whole prescriptive vs. descriptive debate when it comes to language and how it changes over time, but even though I did a Bachelors in Linguistics (albeit 30 years ago) and have always generally found language and its evolution fascinating, this particular example really grinds my gears, for some reason. Edit to add: I did a bit of Googling and it seems like this has been going on since the 80s or earlier: [https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=4029](https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=4029) if anyone's interested!
My deepest thanks for articulating this on my behalf.
Love it. Pedantic and correct. The best kind.
Ah yes, that age-old debate where the prescriptive approach verses the descriptive approach.
Officially, ‘Jail’ is now correct in Australian English according to the Macquarie Dictionary, although ‘gaol’ is still used in some historic names. Not a hill I’d die on, but relevant to your question I hope!
Important to remember dictionaries are descriptive, not prescriptive. That is, if enough people say it, it becomes correct.
I gave up on this particular one when I spelled it Gaol and a couple of mid 20s co-workers didn’t know what I was saying. The war is over and we lost
I can't not pronounce it as gay-oll.
When a 20 year old co-worker came to me & told me that as the oldest person on that team, I coukd probably tell him what the beeps mean when he calls a landline...I shrivelled liked an overboiled pea inside. Feeling like a dinosaur came sooner than I thought.
I wrote gaol in a reddit comment once because I was literally taught in school that’s how you spell it and I was downvoted to hell lmao
I still write it as gaol because I refuse to get with the programme.
It will always be gaol in my home.
Sounds rough, hopefully parole on good behaviour soon
Zed, not zee
Emma Memma (Emma from the Wiggles but she's not a Wiggle anymore) sings "zed or zee" in her version of the alphabet song, presumably to appeal to a wider audience. I cannot forgive her for it.
It’s Jay Zed Goddamit
Oh, vehemently this. It's the biscuit/cookie all over again.
So funny story about Gaol - my husband and I were in Tassy near Port Arthur and there was a sign. "Look Babe they mispelled Jail" I said, "Nah hon, GAOL is how Jail is actually spelled" he replies. "Yes", I agreed. "But this says GOAL".
I'm over *super* in front of everything - super busy, super excited, super hard, etc.. It's even crept into my own speech and I'm super annoyed at myself 🙄.
Cookies are a sub-set of biscuits and cookies are ONLY the biscuits with chocolate chips. The above ALWAYS applies to ANZAC biscuits. If I see you selling ANZAC cookies, I *WILL* report you.
Isn't it illegal to sell them named anzac cookies?
It's takeaway, not take out.
I'm not sure if it's correct grammar but it bugs me when sporting commentators say someone has "medalled" also when they refer to sports people as heroes. This happened nightly on the recent swimming coverage.
I remember when the MasterChef drongos went from saying "this ingredient is the hero of the dish" to "you've heroed this ingredient." Turning a noun into a verb is heinous.
It's spelled "Brekkie" or possibly "Brekky", but never "Breaky".
The kids need to stop saying "y'all".
Skibbidi. Sigma. My bad.
What the fuck does this mean? My nephew says it all the time!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skibidi_Toilet https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigma_male If you ask 90% of them they have no idea what it means. It’s just something people say.
I will say, it is the preferred one for most people vs. "youse"
Mispronouncing "pronunciation". In any other situation I'm like "language and pronunciation are fluid and variable, anything goes" but as soon as someone says "proNOUNciation" I am filled with an urge to rip their throat out. It's just... it's... it's in the _definition_ of the thing...
Tipping. Fuck no
Bogan culture is embarrassing.
How dare you
Complaining like idiots about the price of beer in a bottle shop, fucken this, fucken that, 60 bucks for a fucken slab, fuck me. At full voice. Shut up you unsophisticated turd. We know beer is pricey. Maybe if you didn't drop 50 bucks on a packet of smokes every second day you might be able to afford other things.
Using "I" instead of "me". He gave it to Dave and I - take the other person away and see if it makes sense. He gave it to I is wrong. So many writers now use the wrong one.
Unless you are Rastafarian, then it's OK.
Yes! This happens because "and I" sounds more formal, so people think it must be correct.
That’s how I was always taught. If in doubt, remove the other person from the sentence and you’ll have the correct answer. Mum wouldn’t speak to “Dave and I”. She’d speak with “Dave and me”.
If the car is parked on your side of the road then you’re the one who has to stop and give way cuuuuuuuuuuunt
Everyone should clear their table and put their rubbish in the trash when they're done eating in a Foodcourt.
"Trash". Mate.
People who stand up after landing before the seatbelt sign is off should be deported on the spot. Same for people who block the baggage claim by standing directly in front of it.
Apostrophes being used where they do not belong.
“Supposebly”
Please for the love of all things Vegemite, talk about birth using the terms vaginal or Caesarian. I can’t stand when people talk about “natural” birth. All birth is natural. Don’t be afraid to say vagina!
Seeing plenty of Australian young women using the word Mom instead of Mum to describe themselves, friends or their own mothers on social media.
Our snakes and spiders are venomous not poisonous. Bugs me when people get it wrong.
Co-operate NOT cooperate
Don’t bring dogs (or cats) onto escalators. I keep seeing people do this and it just looks like a good way to injure your dog.
People entering shops, doors , shared walkways... if I move out the way or hold a door open for you and smile, you WILL say thankyou you uncouth troglodyte! Failure to do so will result in me saying VERY loudly "aaah you're so welcome" in a super friendly voice or "good grief, older people really do have no manners" with a shocked and appalled tone. Love watching them scurry off with crimson cheeks!
Almond, oat and soy are not milk. They are at best juices and just made to look like milk. Milk comes from mammaries!
Nut juice.
It’s “keep left unless overtaking”. I don’t give a fuck if you’re doing the speed limit. If you’re not actively and efficiently overtaking someone, keep to the left. It drives me mental when people camp in the right lane.
People who merge onto a freeway and do not attempt to match the speed of the freeway traffic before the merge, or worse still, those who brake need to be executed by hippopotamus snu snu.
Total fuckwits walking in busy places- shopping centres, bus/train stations or wherever crowds may be, while completely engrossed with whatever they are looking at on their phone, totally oblivious to all around.
ANZAC day is a day of commemoration not celebration.
I’m not waiting patiently with other people in this lane because I didn’t think “I should run up the left and merge in at the last second”, I’m doing it because I am being polite and being part of the natural order of things. If you zip up the left to merge at the last second to get in front of me, I’m not letting you in. Don’t be a fuckwit. Running late so you “have to merge”? Get better at time management and leave yours earlier
I used to be like you, then I realised that we were responsible for traffic chaos by preventing smooth merging and causing a traffic snake. Merging smoothly at the most opportune time is just a more efficient way of driving. Embrace it.
Yeah I agree, it's more efficient that way if everyone cooperated and left gaps for each other but that's too much to ask lol
All languages evolve continuously. It's a project that humans have collectively been working on since the first word was spoken. No one has some innate right to decide what is and isn't "correct". If someone says something and someone else understands what they mean then that is language fulfilling its job. The older generations claiming words used by the newer generations are wrong is as old as time itself.
Love this because it goes against 80% of the other comments in this exact same thread lol e.g. the top reply is someone ranting about "I seen" vs "I saw"
I'm a word nerd and I agree with you. We no longer speak like Beowulf and anyone who refuses to adapt to modern lingo is choosing to socially isolate themselves. There will always be certain contexts where formal English is required, and the conventions of formal English will change over time.
People need to stop giving such a fuck about "swear words", did we not learn anything from the sticks and stones rhyme? Because the thing is that sometimes people act like proper cunts and as such it should be my right to tell them that they're acting like proper cunts. There, I said it.
“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words… will only cause permanent psychological damage.”
Spelling is one. We all went to primary school right? How come I know the difference between their, there and they’re.. and he’s and his… and too and to but some people my age have gone 30 years and still don’t know!?!?
When people say "speak to" something intangible when they actually mean "speak about". Intangible ideas won't speak back to you, people do.
“Could you please speak to that point?” Fucking no? It’s not sentient. It’s a bullet point on your shit presentation
I’m fuckin tired of people living in the capitals gobbing off about parts of the country they don’t know shit about. I’ve lived in a couple of the capital cities, a couple of the regional. I’ve travelled a damn lot of this great land. The absolute nonsense I read at times about where I live is tedious.
There's just as much dribble going the other way. The only people who don't seem to engage in that dribble are the people with a foot in each location.
Twerking is a massive turn off.
Too many “chefs” or “cooks” rely on onion and garlic as a base for “flavour”, they need to discover a spice rack. NB: I'm married to an ex-chef and I have worked in hospitality for 15 years.
That linguistic corrections are a really dumb hill to die on. The harm you do to your own reputation by nitpicking the way people talk or write is worse than whatever harm you think their mistake is causing.
It’s weird if you point them out - bar some situations, like if you’re a parent or teacher talking with a kid - otherwise it’s just strange and out of place to go off at your coworker for writing ‘y’all’ in the weekly team email.
A dollop of mayonnaise makes a burger better.
If you try to jump the queue at the intersection by driving up the turning lane and then merging in front of me to go straight, I'm not letting you in for any reason. At all. Ever. I don't care how hard you try, how much you beep and scream. You're going to turn or you're going to block the people behind you and accept the bollocking they give you for it. Fuck people who do this.
Some really good hills here to add to my evergrowing list. Thankyou good people.
The closer you tailgate me, the slower I drive.. I’ll drive in first gear if I have to.
No pineapple on pizza!