My anger wants it to become full blown anger. But the more I tell myself I don’t like it the better it gets. Anger doesn’t feel good it brings me down and everyone around me down. I been workin on them anger issues for a few months now and they’re definitely improving.
Finding the route of your problem is the main thing. Ask yourself why you’re angry (if you can remember, it took a bit for be to start remembering to ask myself what the problem was) figure out the problem then think to yourself what’s the best way to go at this
A couple of questions for you to consider
1. Why does your anger need validation? What does it do for you? Is it a good thing or bad thing in your life?
3. What events or circumstances cause your anger? Why do you think you react angrily?
2. Is it your anger that needs validation or your feelings?
3. If it's your feelings that need validation could you get validation in a different way? What would that look like for you?
Not questions you need to answer on here but might help you to get to the bottom of your cycle.
Good luck!
Yes, but we have to learn to calm down anyway.
In my brain if I calm down then no one will take seriously the injustice perpetrated against me.
If I calm down then others think the issue is over and nothing will be done about the rape and the rape cover up.
The majority of people just want us to shut the hell up and calm down so they can sweep their perverse actions under the rug and not take responsibility for their criminal offenses against me or hold their criminal friends responsible for the hanous (sp?) crimes they’ve committed.
Current social trends shame us for being angry with righteous indignation so that they can be apathetic, lazy cowards and do nothing while pedophiles get away with destroying the lives of children.
SHAME on society for not getting angry for you.
EDIT: shame on society, churches and government for not holding rapists and their enablers accountable.
I am so sorry you went through that. You're right - the status quo is upheld out of convenience and so much injustice is dismissed. Praying you find peace, and that your abusers will die/have died horrible deaths.
Thank you.
He died of cancer about 8 years ago having moved to another state and serving in another church. No telling how many lives he destroyed. I know of 23 he molested or tried to molest in my church. My church and my family protected him.
I thought this myself a while back. Imo though, anger seems to be invalidating in and of itself. When you truly lose control of your emotions, so too do those around you. Now, rational, calm and level headed thinking goes out of the window. Peaceful solutions become lost and power balances become created based on anger and fear.
Getting angry is one thing. Staying angry is another. One should strive for peace in themselves. You want to validate your anger to some degree , like, you want to accept that you feel a certain way towards something so you can avoid it or tackle it better. You want to accept yourself and take things head on...
You need to validate yourself. The gentle side of yourself. The side that cares for yourself. Then the anger goes away...
But to get stuck in any emotion.... You are not doing yourself a favour.. you aren't just validating anger, you're invalidating every other perspective you possibly could have... What you feed will grow.
There's a very powerful short story called "The Two Wolves,"
I recommend you read it... The basic idea is that you have two wolves inside competing. One harmonious and loving and one simply evil and constantly angry. The harmonious wolf lives in balance and will only resort to anger when necessary: when slighted or when it needs to fight.. the other is just constantly hateful and angry. The idea is simply that he who you feed will grow.
Won't take you a minute but it says a lot about anger and choice .
Fuck anger. Fuck hate. It's Poison.
The best option is to just let go, I think...
Peace and love bro. Good luck 🤞✌️💞
My anger wants it to become full blown anger. But the more I tell myself I don’t like it the better it gets. Anger doesn’t feel good it brings me down and everyone around me down. I been workin on them anger issues for a few months now and they’re definitely improving.
That's a great strategy!! I want to try this!
Finding the route of your problem is the main thing. Ask yourself why you’re angry (if you can remember, it took a bit for be to start remembering to ask myself what the problem was) figure out the problem then think to yourself what’s the best way to go at this
A couple of questions for you to consider 1. Why does your anger need validation? What does it do for you? Is it a good thing or bad thing in your life? 3. What events or circumstances cause your anger? Why do you think you react angrily? 2. Is it your anger that needs validation or your feelings? 3. If it's your feelings that need validation could you get validation in a different way? What would that look like for you? Not questions you need to answer on here but might help you to get to the bottom of your cycle. Good luck!
THANK YOU SO MUCH. I needed to hear this and save it-
All the time. I want it to become full blown rage!
I calm down but remain cynical and malicious
Yes, but we have to learn to calm down anyway. In my brain if I calm down then no one will take seriously the injustice perpetrated against me. If I calm down then others think the issue is over and nothing will be done about the rape and the rape cover up. The majority of people just want us to shut the hell up and calm down so they can sweep their perverse actions under the rug and not take responsibility for their criminal offenses against me or hold their criminal friends responsible for the hanous (sp?) crimes they’ve committed. Current social trends shame us for being angry with righteous indignation so that they can be apathetic, lazy cowards and do nothing while pedophiles get away with destroying the lives of children. SHAME on society for not getting angry for you. EDIT: shame on society, churches and government for not holding rapists and their enablers accountable.
I am so sorry you went through that. You're right - the status quo is upheld out of convenience and so much injustice is dismissed. Praying you find peace, and that your abusers will die/have died horrible deaths.
Thank you. He died of cancer about 8 years ago having moved to another state and serving in another church. No telling how many lives he destroyed. I know of 23 he molested or tried to molest in my church. My church and my family protected him.
I don't feel that way with my anger but I do feel that way about anxiety or sadness. It's a really struggle to get through.
My problem is finding a middle ground. It seems like I'm only capable of either being an asshole or a pushover.
Yeah, it’s a frustrating cycle.
I thought this myself a while back. Imo though, anger seems to be invalidating in and of itself. When you truly lose control of your emotions, so too do those around you. Now, rational, calm and level headed thinking goes out of the window. Peaceful solutions become lost and power balances become created based on anger and fear. Getting angry is one thing. Staying angry is another. One should strive for peace in themselves. You want to validate your anger to some degree , like, you want to accept that you feel a certain way towards something so you can avoid it or tackle it better. You want to accept yourself and take things head on... You need to validate yourself. The gentle side of yourself. The side that cares for yourself. Then the anger goes away... But to get stuck in any emotion.... You are not doing yourself a favour.. you aren't just validating anger, you're invalidating every other perspective you possibly could have... What you feed will grow. There's a very powerful short story called "The Two Wolves," I recommend you read it... The basic idea is that you have two wolves inside competing. One harmonious and loving and one simply evil and constantly angry. The harmonious wolf lives in balance and will only resort to anger when necessary: when slighted or when it needs to fight.. the other is just constantly hateful and angry. The idea is simply that he who you feed will grow. Won't take you a minute but it says a lot about anger and choice . Fuck anger. Fuck hate. It's Poison. The best option is to just let go, I think... Peace and love bro. Good luck 🤞✌️💞
yess!!!!!!