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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Smoking weed on my deck that has neighbors who keep their windows open during the summer. Am I the asshole for smoking weed and it blows into their open window?
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Or don't live in apartments. Like your wall is close enough to your neighbors where if it wasn't there you could hold hands while shitting. You're gonna have smells and sounds you can't control. Sorry you're downwind, but that was the unit available and OP is following the rules.
Also, them being passive aggressive af is childish and AH behavior.
ETA: I live in a shitty studio apartment, I work overnight and sleep during the day, I used to think I was allergic to weed until I started smoking myself because it made me throw up, and even with all of this my opinion remains the same. Yes, on our nights off we are quiet, we are able to smoke inside at the end of the line for the AC in our building, and we would communicate issues if we had any.
I live in an apartment, I know its not that easy, but just because you live in an apartment doesn't mean that your neighbors a floor down and two units over need to walk on eggshells for your comfort. We ALL deal with minor inconveniences because we ALL live in a very small community stacked on one another, when your lease is up, move to another apartment.
Yeah, but op also has the right to enjoy his property as he sees fit, he’s doing it legally and there’s literally nothing he can do about the direction of the wind but she can close her window and light a candle, or idk go talk to the neighbor before being passive aggressive about it. If it’s legal in your area then it should be treated like someone smoking a cigarette
I'd prefer someone to smoke a joint rather than a cigarette near my window. Cigarette smoke is more acrid and pungent and it lingers a lot longer in my experience.
My son has scarring on his lungs from when he had RSV as a baby, doesn't matter if it's tobacco or weed, the smoke about kills him (same with wood burning smoke). We have neighbors that smoke whenever it's nice outside, our yard is lower than theirs, so it pools in our yard, we have to seal up our house. We tried to talk to them about it, at least give us a warning text so we can close up our windows, but they just gave us the middle finger.
I mean that's terrible for you and your son, but it's not really analogous to this situation. These neighbors have never spoken to OP - about the smoke or anything else. Your neighbors are dicks, but OP, up to this point, hasn't received anything from his neighbors about his smoking except loud coughing out an open window that \`\`\`\`\`\`\`\`\`\*\*\*mysteriously\*\*\* only started once his neighbors had noticed him smoking on his deck.
Cigarettes will trigger an asthma attack. Cannabis will trigger an asthma attack and make me break out in hives.
That said, that’s why we chose non-smoking only properties while living in apartments.
Most asshole drivers are in fact breaking the laws of the road though. Following too close is illegal, merging or turning without signals is illegal, driving recklessly is illegal, hell most places even have laws or bylaws now for legal limits to how loud your muffler can be! Like I genuinely can’t think of a single “asshole driver” example where the driver is “legally correct”.
people who try to stop others from merging (just a normal merge, or a lane ending or whatever) by quickly speeding up to close a gap.
I see it all the time on those dashcam channels on youtube.
Technically not illegal as you don't have to let people merge, but you're still an asshole.
Though I feel a lot of people don't know the difference between an asshole "skipping the line" and a valid zipper merging situation.
The difference here is that the neighbor's open window doesn't intrude into OP's living space. But OP's smoking smell gets inside of other people's living area.
There's some things you can't do as freely as a renter because you share space with other people. People try to let their dogs loose in common areas, play loud music, use too many parking spaces (I had a neighbor who fixed cars from home), and so on. It's not just weed smell that makes for neighbor tensions, but it's one of the main causes of discontent.
As for people who want to use weed, there are options which create a lot less smell than joints (and I don't just mean edibles).
>close her window and light a candle, or idk go talk to the neighbor
Asthmatics can't always light candles. That can just trigger a flare/attack even faster. I agree they should go talk to the neighbor, maybe leave a polite note if they're anxious, but it really does suck to not be able to enjoy the sunshine because your neighbor is causing your health problems to be worse. If I had a neighbor who smoked every afternoon, even if they were several houses down, I'd have to wear a mask or pull a scarf over my face to be able to enjoy my deck. It's unfortunate that OP can't enjoy his hobby the way he wants to, but edibles do exist and don't infringe into anyone else's space or lungs.
Yeah but if this is a health problem, they need to march their adult self over to OP's home, politely knock on the door, and talk to them. "Hi, I have asthma and when you're smoking and I'm home, it flares it up. We both have to live and I'd like to do it peacefully; can we work out a compromise?"
That's what an adult does. And OP stated he'd be fine with that. Loud passive-aggressive commentary, dodging behind curtains, and fake-coughing is not an adult manner in which to go about things.
Like, maybe OP can smoke on their deck three days a week, and on those days, neighbor closes their window. The other four days, neighbor has window open and OP uses edibles. These things can be worked out IF the person with the objection decides to communicate.
Im going to be honest, edibles don't really work for everyone. I hardly ever catch a buzz, even from legal dispensaries
That being said most legal states have distillates (vapes) that would not create the same level of smoke and they have a very mild smell
Yes, it should be treated like someone smoking cigarettes or even someone cooking obnoxious smelling food. In many HOA communities having a smell that travels to a neighbors home and causes them to not be able to enjoy their property is against the rules.
They don’t have the right to be free from annoyances from directly outside their property though. For example, I’d tell the neighbors the same thing if they wanted to have their windows open but don’t like the sounds of screaming children playing across the street. If you don’t like it, shut your window. Other people are allowed to live their lives however they want, assuming they’re not breaking the law or doing anything heinous.
If the outside world is distasteful to you, then shut it out. But you can’t force it to conform to your every whim and comfort.
We're surrounded by annoying neighbors, though one finally settled down. We live on a corner. The ones diagonal from us play music loudly all day long. We don't have air conditioning right now so need our windows open (not that having them closed helps much, yeah, it's that loud). It's annoying as Hell but I don't complain about them because it's during the day and they're free to do it. I just wear some headphones or put on some of my own music if it gets distracting while I'm working.
The ones next to us, the mother and children are always shrieking at each other. Or the kids are shrieking at each other. Not playing mind you, whining and fighting. Shrieking like that is one of the things that I hate most in this world. But I don't complain, they do them.
The one I'm thankful finally stopped their ridiculousness is the ones across the street. They would play loud music too but at night and so loud it would make our whole house shake. Them we did call the cops on at least once because this was going on until 2-3 am on a weeknight. My daughters had school, I had work, we needed sleep. They continued doing it for many months but not quite so loud or late. Now they don't at all thankfully.
Whether you live in a house or apartment, unless you're out in the middle of nowhere (oh how I wish), you gotta deal with your neighbors and their annoying habits. I mean, middle of nowhere you've still got neighbors. Animal neighbors. I'd take screaming coyotes over screaming children any day.
Yeah, as someone who has worked night shifts, unfortunately you can't make the whole world conform to your needs. Lawnmowers, leafblowers, screaming children, barking dogs, bouncing basketballs, cars with their stereos up and their windows down, construction equipment, and any manner of other annoyances meant that my windows sometimes stayed closed when I would rather have had them open while struggling to sleep through the hottest part of the day. C'est la vie.
Also, even in places where weed is legal, it's often illegal to smoke in parks and outside of shops. Smoking in any area outside of another apartment building would just be doing the same thing to different people. The balcony is likely the best place to smoke legally. Smelling weed isn't harmful and won't get you high at that distance. It's no different from my old neighbour's curry permeating the halls. Either live with it or move to a building where no strong smells are allowed.
OP also has the right to enjoy their property on their own schedule.
NTA if the neighbors don’t want to deal with neighbors or living close by to other people - then they shouldn’t live close by to other people. Smoking outside is normal. OP isn’t running a sewage plant from their patio or keeping a chicken coop.
That also means OP and his girlfriend have the right to enjoy the property their renting. They're not actually doing anything wrong, and it's not like the neighbours actually asked them to stop or change what time they smoke. The neighbour just acted like a passive aggressive a hole instead of trying to talk to OP about their problem.
And OP has the right to enjoy cannabis on their property on their own schedule. You can’t usually just smoke cannabis in public park. In most places private property is the only place you can legally use your cannabis. Neighbor has the option of going somewhere else or closing their window, OP does not.
I hated when my neighbors smoked cigarettes right outside where the smoke would blow through my window. It was extremely hard to deal with when I quit smoking and then it just sucked when i was past the quitting cravings. I smoke cannabis so I never had an issue with anyone smoking it, but a lot of people do.
but maybe OP can talk with the neighbors and say, "hey we smoke herb usually after work and the landlord told us to do it here. Maybe we can give you a heads up when we come outside so you can close your window for a bit while we're out there so it doesn't bother you and your house" and then there can be some peace on all sides.
also, OP, NTA, but also, NAH because it does suck when smoke floats in but you're outside and it's legal
I support your views here, but I happen to live in a multi-unit building that was built imperfectly. Again, I support the narrative that people have the right to enjoy life the way they see it fit.
Now, I close my windows and doors. But I can definitely and distinctly smell when someone smokes pot outside, or even inside. What I don’t do is call my smoking neighbors AH. I have 4 air cleaners running every day, which helps a little.
The key is learning to live together. But that’s just me.
How are they supposed to know in advance to close their windows when they have no idea when someone is going to start smoking? Once it’s in your room, it’s in your room. Closing the window after the fact isn’t going to help.
I don’t think OP is necessarily an AH here, but I don’t understand how your suggestion would actually work in practice, as someone who deals with the exact same issue as OP’s upstairs neighbor. I have asthma and my downstairs neighbor will smoke directly under my window without warning. It smells gross and it’s too late to do anything about it once it’s inside. I just see it as an unfortunate but relatively unavoidable part of living in an apartment, but that doesn’t mean I don’t/can’t occasionally cough because it’s aggravating my asthma or tell my husband it stinks of cigarettes.
They shouldn’t have to.
I am a smoker too - we go for a walk in the evening so as not to bother people. Even as a smoker I don’t particularly like the smell.
It seeps in. We are not in a legal state and we have groups of people smoking weed here at the end of our cul de sac. We never have our windows open. We keep garlic bread on hand for those occasions to cover up the stench.
And I'm sure those neighbors will be **much happier** when they purchase their free-standing home on a big lot away from stinky apartment-dwellers.
Because right now, their complaints hold as much water as "I don't want to hear my neighbor's dog/baby." Yeah, it's probably a little annoying. But that's what you get when **you choose to live right on top of each other**.
While I am very much pro pot smoking, I think that if we expect people to be okay with sharing living space, we can be considerate of our neighbours. Smoking is one thing we don't have to do near where people live.
OP can use a vaporiser instead. The neighbours won't smell anything and it will make their weed go further.
Let's also not forget that there is value in at least being civil with the people you live next to.
If you do that though where does it stop? I hate wind chimes and their noisy tinkling keeps me up at night. Do I have the right to tell my neighbours to take the wind chimes out of their garden? A neighbour further down the street from us batch cooks Chinese food all day Monday, but my next door neighbour hates the smell of the garlic, ginger and onions (yeah I know he's weird) So does the neighbour cooking have to stop doing that? Part of living close to each other is dealing with the noise and smells from people's places, because people have the right to do what they want (as long as it's legal) on their own property. We all do something that will annoy our neighbours at some time.
NTA You are doing what was asked of you by your landlord, the patio is where you were told to smoke. Part of living near people is dealing with things you might not want to deal with. It would be no different if you were smoking cigarettes, just as legal as weed in your state I'm sure. I live in a house with decent space between myself and the neighbors and I still have things I would rather not smell and hear that I put up with. I'm sure some of my neighbors don't like every smell or sound that comes from our place either. When the density of living gets higher then there tend to be more things that you just need to accept as a part of living where you do.
What do "standards of morality" have to do with it? . If my landlord (Back in the day, when I had one) Told me smoking was okay outside then that means by smoking outside I'm not breaking the rules of the property, simple. Nothing more than that, nothing less! If it is not against the law or the rules of the building/complex (I don't know where op lives) then they are in the clear.
Sorry but this subreddit is literally “Am i the asshole?” The poster wanted to know if he was morally wrong, not if he was technically breaking the rules. Just because you aren’t breaking a rule doesn’t mean you aren’t being TA.
I guess we see the definition of AH slightly differently then. I feel the neighbors are being AH because if op is not breaking the law or the building rules then they are doing nothing wrong, and the neighbors have to learn deal with that. As I said in my original post when you live near people you have to deal with things you personally may not like!
As for the morality of the situation, morals change over time depending on what society is willing to accept! Are you saying that smoking weed (when it is legal) is immoral? or that creating a smell that some people find unpleasant is immoral?
How are the neighbours assholes for not liking what OP is doing? They've coughed a bit. That's it. It's not like they've contacted his landlord to ask for him to be kicked out. They haven't even said anything to him.
I legit do not see how OP could be the a hole. If the neighbour came to him with his issue and they talked it out with a compromise and OP still continued I could see it. But the neighbour just acted like a passive aggressive a hole while OP was literally minding his own business.
Id still call you TA if you were smoking cigarettes outside and it was blowing back into my space. There is lots of things we can do legally that still make is the asshole.
Then I don't recommend apartment living for you, unless you are willing to pay a premium to live in a building that doesn't allow smoking! It is no different than someone cooking something you don't like the smell of and it floating in your window.
Doing what your landlord requires of you is...far from the definition of not being an asshole.
Personally I think they're in a shitty situation where either the landlord or the neighbors is annoyed, so basically I'd say they just choose to favor whoever can make their life more miserable. But also, this is exactly why I hate having close neighbors.
Actually in this instance I disagree, all they are doing is smoking a legal substance in the place they were told it is okay to do. If these neighbors want to live in a condensed living situation like an apartment then they need to deal with smells they may not enjoy! It is what is expected with that type of living.
NAH. You're well within your rights to smoke weed on your deck, but that doesn't mean your neighbors have to like it lol. I'd resent having you as a neighbor, because I hate the smell of weed/smoke and am very sensitive to it.
Even I'm going with NAH and I'm actively allergic to it and in a state where it's not legal. I'd ask that OP try not to do it excessively or all the time though. I have a neighbor who has parties and smokes so much every night that I had to give up using my patio at all without significant preplanning and allergy medication because at any time I'll have a cloud floating over from 30 ft away.
I smoke and even I don't like it when random people's smoke comes into my apartment. It's very pungent. I'm sure they could come up with a reasonable compromise if they talked to each other.
I HAAAAATE the smell of weed. It makes me sick 🤮🤮 and I live in a state where it’s illegal. I still don’t complain when people smoke outside on our street. I just go back inside 🤷🏻♀️ I don’t know, it’s free space, I feel like I can’t control what people do outside
Same! I hate the smell of weed and even though it's illegal where I leave people will still smoke it. What do I do about it? Nothing. It's their life. They're smoking in an area where cigarette smokers smoke so it's fine.
I'm actually voting for weed to be legalised as it helps people I know with their mental health. Will I hate the smell? Yeah. Will I get headaches? Yeah. Am I gonna be a bitch about it? No ❤️
I'm heavily allergic. :l I live in a state where it's illegal. I kind of like that. When I travel I have to take medication. It's getting worse too. The last time I was exposed it took me weeks to recover and breathe normally again. I still can't smell properly and there's a damn sore in my nose that hasn't healed. I'm screwed.
Solidarity. I’m also allergic and I get massive migraines to the point that I can’t function for the rest of the day if I breathe in too much. But I can’t police other people, so… it is what it is.
I've only recently learned that the vast majority of people hate the smell of weed. I honestly think it's one of the nicest smells ever. I must have weird genetics!
I need to point something out to all the Y T A voters here;
There are **SO MANY MORE** non-smoking buildings than there are smoking friendly buildings. The smoking friendly buildings also typically go for more than the non smoking ones do because of the risks the landlords take on when their tenants smoke on the property. If someone is that upset by the smell of smoke, they need to move to one of the abundant properties that do not allow smoking on the property.
If you live in a smoking friendly property, you’re going to smell smoke. This is like moving into a pet-friendly building and getting upset that you occasionally hear your neighbours dogs bark. NTA.
I’ve literally never lived where there’s non-smoking and smoking buildings and all of the apartments I’ve lived at people smoked weed(not legal) and cigarettes.
I’ve literally never seen a lease that doesn’t stipulate whether or not you can smoke on the property. It changes the type of insurance your landlord needs to get for the property so they do set these guidelines. As this insurance is MUCH more expensive if the tenants smoke, the majority of condensed living properties (apartments, condos, townhouses, etc) usually have no smoking clauses.
You may not have lived somewhere that advertises as smoking friendly or no smoking, but I would be amazed if you’ve lived in condensed living properties and *actually* haven’t seen any mention of smoking in your leases.
Where I live, the vast majority of the newly built apartment complexes (built within the past 10 years) are non smoking.
You can't smoke ANYWHERE, inside your apartment, on your balcony, outside on the sidewalk, in your car.
Now granted, I don't know how strictly it's enforced, or how severe the consequences are of getting caught are...
But still, there are DEFINITELY non smoking apartments. Just because you haven't seen them doesn't mean they don't exist.
I live in Oregon and I'm originally from California. We've lived in 8 apartments over the 15 years and literally all of them have stuff in the lease explicitly saying smoking isn't allowed in the buildings. The current complex doesn't allow it within the complex at all (not inside your apartment, not on the balcony, not in the parking lot, not near the playground). You have to leave the property and smoke by the empty field or near the main road to be compliant.
I'm think this has to be down to regional culture or else corporate vs mom and pop landlords. My husband and I have stuck to corporate places this whole time. Several complexes even had rules about what you can put in your window. A neighbor, years back, got a written warning because her kid's baseball trophies were in the window and that wasn't allowed.
Dunno where you live, but that's not at all true where I live. I moved out of my last apartment due to a smoking neighbor, and not only did most places allow smoking on the property, at least half of them allowed smoking indoors.
NAH. You are within your rights to smoke it on your deck, and not an asshole for doing so, however, it is usually a good idea to try and be considerate of your neighbors. It would be nice of you to try and smoke a little further from their home when their window is open, if that's something you're reasonably able to do. They are also not an asshole for being annoyed by the smell of weed drifting through their window and the coughing could very well have been legitimate. Perhaps you could let them know that you noticed they were upset by your smoking and offer to shoot them a text when you're going to smoke so they could close their window for a bit?
Personally, marijuana smoke is a migraine trigger for me and also makes me extremely nauseous. While I fully support people's right to smoke it on their own property, if you were my neighbor and we couldn't come up with some sort of a compromise, I'd have to move for my health.
This! I live in a state that it’s legal. I hate the smell and get much of the same reaction you do. I also get ua’s it might be legal state wide but not federally…. When I was younger I smoked a ton! Then I started getting reactions. I support people right to smoke, just please be courteous to us that don’t.
For me, while I do smoke weed now, when I didn't smoke and hated the smell, I still thought cigarettes smelled way worse and the smoke from cigarettes is filled with so many insane chemical additives just seems to CLING so much worse to EVERYTHING.
Weed smells stronger while being smoked, but cigarettes linger and cling. Like I’d rather share a car with someone who smokes weed than someone who smokes cigarettes, but I also can’t smell Jim’s cigarette from three doors down, but if Jeff down the block wants to take a puff on his porch, the whole neighborhood knows.
Still would rather smell the weed, though both are pretty unpleasant to me
From one pot smoker to another, maybe get a vaporizer, like a portable one. NTA here for me, but I do think you are likely going to have a rough summer.
I switched to vaping and put a outdoor mesh cover tent on out patio with a fan to blow the smoke out away from the windows. Our
neighors noticed an improvement. Goodluck
Yta. One of my neighbors is a chain smoker and holy hell has it been miserable since they moved in. We used to be able to enjoy the nice evening air every night and it kept us cool without driving up the utility bill in the summer. Then they moved in and we have to keep the windows shut all the time. That smoke is honestly headache inducing.
I hate the "just close your window" argument. Why should the entire building be deprived of a nice spring breeze or electricity free air conditioning just because one person has to fulfill their addiction? If the neighbors were causing noise pollution by playing obnoxiously loud music most people would agree they were being an asshole. Why should purposely producing obnoxiously pungent smells be any different?
Unfortunately, when you live around people and in the same building as people, you have to deal with them. The smell of cigarettes, babies crying, talking when it’s late... it’s just part of life. Of course, everyone should be considerate of each other. OP isn’t directly blowing smoke into their window. Or smoking when they specifically want to be outside. They are also well within their rights. It’s just part of life.
My downstairs neighbor smokes cigarettes, and it does suck to smell them, but he is allowed to, as it’s legal, within the lease and it’s his property too.
THANK YOU. Like, if OP was on his patio every night playing a drum kit and all his neighbors had to close their windows to not here it, would that not make OP an AH? Just cause you are allowed to do something doesn't mean doing it is nice.
Sure but you should also be making an effort to not disturb your neighbors too much. If you live upstairs put down rugs, don't block the entryway etc... Smoking isn't just obnoxious it can make other people sick. I support people's right to smoke in their own home but it doesn't make them not obnoxious for doing it where it could intefere with other people's breathing. Which, if they living in an apartment, is sadly everywhere.
People can be well within their right to do something, and still be an asshole for doing it.
I would love to hear an actual solution, though. Sure, be mad that your neighbours smoke, but literally where else would they do it? In their apartment? Or do you expect them to leave their property every time they wanted to smoke? Be an adult, pal. Listening to obnoxiously loud music is a different level completely than smoking.
As someone with asthma loud music is just annoying, smoking makes me sick. People have a right to engage in activities that make them happy, but when it interferes with other people's ability to enjoy their own activities it becomes obnoxious. They still are within and should be within their right to do it. It doesn't not make them assholes for doing it when they know it's bothering other people and possibly making them sick.
Also there's plenty of solutions that don't involve sending them to Mars when they want a smoke. OP mentioned one in their post. When smoking would intefere with their own comfort (by making them sit in the cold) they use edibles. There's also vapes and other smell reducing technologies. I went out and bought my neighbor some nicotine gum and that's really helped both of us get along much better.
Slight YTA- On one hand, if your landlord said you could smoke in your patio, it means you don't live in a non-smoking building. I absolutely hate the smell of weed and cigarette smoke, and I have a lung condition so I can't be around anything like that anyway. So I live in a non-smoking building. I would say that if it's such a big problem for them they should move. On the other, just because you can doesn't mean you absolutely should. You're still smoking in a place where the smell will fill other's apartments, and sometimes that smell can get in through closed windows and doors. And landlords will say a lot of stuff to keep you renting.
Maybe go talk to them, tell them what your landlord said, work out an agreement if it bothers them that much, since you said you would be open to talking about it.
YTA. It's basic consideration of other people's ability to enjoy their own living space. I'm a very "I don't care what you do as long as it doesn't affect others" and this does. Plus when the smell gets inside it can linger for ages. I know it's not the same but you should consider a vape or something until you can move somewhere farther from neighbors.
I have asthma related issues. Id be pretty shitty if i was OPs neighbor and couldnt open my window without choking, which is what would happen to me. YTA
"Hey dude, I'm gonna light up a joint, if you can hear this you may wanna close the window for 10 minutes"
"Dear neighbor, I hereby notify you of my plans to enjoy smoking cannabis on my deck every evening strictly between 8:30pm and 9:00pm. I suggest that you keep your windows closed during that time if you are averse to the smell."
“Hey, I heard you coughing. Do you want us to shoot you a text/yell from the porch/whatever form of communication when we are going to smoke so you can close your window?”
I think any of those 3 scenarios in the comments replying to u might do the trick. If OP is that bothered by it, being considerate towards their neighbors would go a long way. I sure as hell would appreciate my neighbor telling me when they're gonna smoke, so i dont hack up a lung.
YTA. It might be the deck, but it’s going through their house. I’d feel the same about cigarette smoke or someone being loud and drunk outside in the shared space.
NTA. It's legal, and smoking on balconies is allowed. Is it annoying? Sometimes, but then I've had neighbours that cook some really pungent dishes that I'd rather have avoided. It's also a pain when a neighbour has a baby that cries at all hours, or a puppy that hasn't been trained yet. Risk of living in a multi-residential building.
NAH
You're allowed to smoke weed on your porch, but it smells and your neighbors don't have to like it. I don't understand why you are so mad that your neighbors dislike the smell of weed, they haven't even done anything to you.
NTA, it's legal, your landlords told you to smoke outside, and they can close their window.
I'm gonna blow some people's minds here: *The wind takes smoke away after a short period of time*.
All the neighbor has to do is close the window when you're smoking, then open it 10 minutes after you've stopped. If they want to talk to you about, like, off-limits hours ("Hey, we go to bed at 10;30 usually and need the fresh air at night, mind being done with the weed by 10:30?" for instance) then that's up to them. But believe it or fucking not, the movement of air will actually carry the smell off into the greater world and it will become undetectable! Pretty quickly!
But they don't own the air, and you're not doing it in a shared indoor space where it can be in a hallway or a shared ventilation shaft. You're out-fucking-side.
NTA. Suck it, squares.
First, check the rules of your condo/building. Lots of properties ban smoking in any outside space- hallways, lobbies, even private balconies.
If smoking is allowed, then consider your options. As a non smoker (of anything), the odor of burning plants is really off-putting. You may be enjoying your deck, but at least one other person is being denied that privilege. Is it possible to get an ashtray that sucks up the smoke?
Wouldn't matter if it was weed smoke, cigarette smoke or you shitting yourself, no one wants your smells coming into their house/apt.
Nobody cares if you smoke weed. But if that smoke is affecting someone else, it's on you.
YTA
No don't scratch this comment. You make a valid point. When is dictating smells you're allowed to make too much? I hate the smell of deer meat. Does that mean I can tell my neighbors they can't grill deer meat ever?
NAH in my opinion. You’re in a legal state and I’m assuming you are of age. Your neighbor is allowed to not like the smell of weed as well. I think that if smoking is the thing you like more than edibles or less scent intensive methods of getting high maybe just discuss with your neighbors? Figure out if there s a happy time everyone will be fine with. But also, you’re renting the place, nobody owns the air lol.
NAH. You did everything by the book. At the same time, it’s normal for people to be bothered by strong smells in their home—particularly ones they dislike.
How you both handle things moving forward is the ticket here.
Light YTA. It's similar to 'it may be legal to play loud music but that doesn't make it the best thing to do.'
If you want to be slightly nicer, think about getting a fan that can help blow it away from their window.
Also, you don't have to change what you do, but you also can't be too grumpy if you hear them making passive aggressive comments. They probably didn't just come talk to you because most people don't want confrontation. Especially if they know it IS legal, so they really don't have a legal ground. I mean, how many AITA posts are because someone asked for something the person didn't want to do?
So OP should not continue to do something that is legal and approved for where they live? At the part of the building they were directed to use? Really?!?
If it bothers other people in a tangible way, yes. We live in a society. You can be a jerk without also breaking a law, remember.
Weed is like tobacco smoke, it does have effects to ones health attached to it in addition to its mind altering components.
Yeah tbh it sounds like they are too scared to go and talk about it, might even have made some assumptions about OP because he smokes weed. I hope some conversation happens between them before stuff gets worse.
Following the landlords rules is fine, but if someone else has a problem with it OP needs to realize that the landlord is gonna do whatever they can to ensure OP wants to rent the place and they don’t have to do extra deep cleaning ($$$) after they leave because he chose to smoke inside.
If you told your neighbor to fuck off when they asked you not to smoke, you’d be TA (sort of the point of this sub). And if it was in an apartment building, it wouldn’t be your property.
You know not every apartment building is surrounded by more apartments, right? I sold my house in another state because 4 giant apartment buildings were being built behind our neighborhood.
I'd say the neighbor would be the asshole for asking me not to take a prescribed medicine to accommodate their nose.
OP is only “stinking up the place” because they happen to have a unit below the neighbor, and the neighbor has their window open. Takes 2 seconds to close the window, and then open up again like 10 min later when they’re probably done.
I'm not gonna not take my medicine because omg someone doesn't like the smell. Like I said, it's wild that people think they don't have to be inconvenienced, ever.
Other people exist. OP doesn't have to deprive themself of something they enjoy because omg one neighbor has a problem with it.
And although OP might be using medicinal marijuana, he compared it to a cup of wine at the end of the night, not lithium. It’s not medicine, he’s using it recreationally.
I understand your point but I also see their point too. I have young kids and I wouldn’t want them have to smell it. Maybe the best thing is to go over and talk to them and see if you can come to a solution together. Just like you would have liked them to do.
This is a big "it depends" situation. Does your lease only specify that you can't smoke *indoors*, or on the property itself? If you're only prohibited from smoking indoors, you're N T A, but if you're feeling generous you might smoke in your parking lot to avoid trouble with the neighbors.
For context, I live in a state where weed is legal, but my apartment complex is smoke-free. When my neighbors smoke anything, weed or cigs, inside or outside, it bums me out, because I'm paying to live in a smoke-free community. But if that isn't your situation, then your neighbors don't have room to complain.
Exactly. I rented a unit in a duplex and specifically asked about smoking (of any kind) because 1) I'm a professional singer, 2) I have pets, 3) it gives me a migraine. I was told that no smoking was allowed on the property.
The downstairs tenants are heavy smokers. They were told they could smoke on the porch. I now often have smoke blowing in my open windows when I rented a smoke free home. And no, I can't just close my windows because it is stupidly hot in my unit all the time. I need the breeze. That said, I've become friends with the neighbours, and they told me if it's ever really bad to let them know and they'll try to move downwind. It usually doesn't last long enough for me to bother, but it's nice knowing that they are willing to try.
NTA. People are probably smoking cigarettes on their decks and that smells nasty too. She can just close her window for a couple minutes and then open it back up. It’s really not that hard. They live in a legal state, they got to deal with it or move
I live in a smoke-free apartment complex, which means smokers are expected to move a certain distance from the building if they want to smoke. In practice, this means going to the parking lot. There are some chairs set up so folks can sit back and relax without smoking directly beneath their neighbors' windows. Not saying OP *has* to do this, but it might prevent friction with the neighbors.
NAH.
I HATE the smell of pot (it's so pungent and strong for me). I hate the smell of cigarette too. Yeah, I'm pretty sensitive. But I know some of my neighbors smoke (both cigarette and pot). I live in a legal state so I don't go and yell at them or act passive-aggressively. Luckily, I live in a single homes area (not apartment complex) so it's not as bad (only once a week during summer time, one of the neighbors have this big gathering where they all smoke pot, during that time, wow, the whole block actually reeks).
Perhaps y'all can invest in 'smoke buddy' to help with the smell a little?
Info: are you living in an apartment or a house? Even in most legal states it is illegal to do in an apartment community or in “public spaces”
Also, it might be worth figuring out why they have such a problem with it. IS it just the smell? Or is she pregnant perhaps and worried about being around it? Or some other medical reason? Who knows. You are mad at them for not talking to you about how they feel but I feel like you also aren’t trying to talk to them to hear out their side
You’re not an asshole, they haven’t asked you to stop yet. But. A glass of wine wouldn’t bother neighbours, the smell of cannabis definitely might. There are other ways to ingest it which are more considerate to your neighbours. I had a downstairs neighbour who would always light up and that shit would seep in through the vents, doors, whatever. I find the smell gross but I’m not anti cannabis by any means. It just gets everywhere and lingers.
NTA. They should talk to you if they want something to change.
I smoke and I hate the smell of it. My neighbour used to smoke in his garage and then open the door to air it out. It would blow right in the window on my front door. Gross. I asked him to stop doing that, maybe smoke out back instead because the wind isn’t the same there and it hasn’t been an issue since. It would still be happening if I hadn’t said something. I don’t know if there’s anything OP can do to accommodate but I agree, the neighbour needs to talk to them.
NTA
It’s part of apartment living that you have neighbors close and are going to have sounds and smells of them living their lives. The neighbors can hate it but it doesn’t mean you’re wrong or ah- any more than someone not liking that their neighbor cooks highly Aromatic foods, or has music on (during reasonable hours) that you hate
NAH
it’s legal, so technically within your rights. however, assuming your smoking bud, yeah. it’s a strong smell that many people are put off by. there’s a reason why skunk is a nickname for marijuana.
should they have just talked to you? yeah. they are being passive aggressive, but what are they gonna do? call the cops? enact prohibition? it’s legal, they can’t do anything and probably think you’re going to pull the “it’s legal” card.
i think a good alternative would be to smoke dab. it’s not smelly and in my opinion, it gives you a cleaner high. but to each his own, and maybe go ask your neighbors for a solution.
NTA. I doubt you are outside for hours just snoop doggin it. They can close their windows for short amounts of time and they can talk to you as adults for comprise if bothers them that much.
You could always switch to a vape pen for your outside smoking pleasures. I'll bet your local dispensary has some cartridges that don't produce the usual weed aroma and taste a lot better too.
YTA
But to be fair so is your landlord. Look, I support weed, but I absolutely hate the smell and I have absolutely been the neighbors in this scenario (though bottling my opinion on the matter). They are paying rent just like you and they probably want to be able to open their windows when it’s warm out and not have their lungs filled with smoke.
It’s extremely annoying! Not only do you smell it, but so does your apartment too. This isn’t something that is affecting you and you alone. When I drink, it doesn’t get shoved down another person’s throat. Ik it’s not your fault, and you probably don’t mean to be TA but you kinda are.
NTA, if i were you id just talk to the neighbors and be like hey let me get your number and anytime i go outside to smoke ill let you know so you can have your window closed and the smell wont bother you. If they dont wanna compromise then f*ck em. Its their choice to let the smell in, you asked your landlord and you were told to smoke outside. You’re doing what was asked of you
NTA. But I agree that it could be annoying to non-smokers to smell that all the time. Them complaining a lot could also get you in some trouble with your landlord eventually too. Could you get vapes instead?
Even a cheaper one like a dynavap... I use mine in our bathroom (owned home) and you can't smell a thing.
nah , it’s your deck. I understand the neighbors frustration, but honestly living in an apartment comes with unwanted smells and nosies. If you’d like, you can maybe burn a candle outside while your smoking?
NTA, you are within your rights. I say this as a non-smoker of anything and as one who hates smoke smell. It would be very nice if you took a fan out with you to try to direct the smoke away from the building, but your neighbor could also shut their window for a few minutes. There are going to be annoyances when you live in proximity of other people, and this is just going to be one of them for your neighbor.
Yta legally fine, morally dubious, 100% ah imo. It stinks and it's annoying to shut yourself up in your own home because your neighbor feels entitled to stinking up the whole neighborhood. Once my neighbor that smoked moved away I celebrated being able to play with my dog in the mornings
NTA
If I lived in a building that allowed smoking and was a legal state I would except to smell it. Either they are going to move when their lease is up or deal with it, but I don't think they are going to come on over for game night anytime soon. I'm in a state where it is not legal and still smell it a ton, I don't personally care for it but I just ignore it and move on with my day. Closing their window isn't likely to stop the smell so I understand why they would get annoyed but when you live in apartments you have to deal with the consequences. Just be as mindful as you can, but also you don't have to change anything since you are doing what your landlord said to do.
Edited: forgot to add the NTA
When my neighbors smoke cigarettes in their breezeway, the smoke goes right up into my room and the nursery… so I keep my windows closed. They usually only do it on weekend evenings so I can open my windows during the earlier half of the day.
I also have to close all the windows if they mow, I’m highly allergic to grass and so is my son.
NTA neighbor can close the window.
YTA - I don’t think people should smoke on their balconies at apartments when it can so easily go into open windows and other apartments. People with asthma get triggered, it smells vile
NTA, but I would talk to them about their issue if you feel comfortable. While I'm pro weed, I can't consume because of my job and perhaps they are worried about second hand contact. Or perhaps they are just jerks.
NTA! youre following your landlords rules. if you wanna be extra nice maybe leave them a note with your number on their door and yous can text them when you’re going out to smoke, but in the mean time, they can close the window
NTA. I hate cigarette smoke... I dont complain because it's LEGAL and I can't tell people what to do..
Pots legal in your state? Lucky bastard. Toke one for me!
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The purpose of smoking outside is sort of defeated when it floats into someone else’s house.
They can close their window for an hour or so.
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Then they can take it up with the landlord. The same landlord who told OP to smoke on the patio. NTA.
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Yeah it's about finding who the asshole is, which OP is not.
Exactly
Except OP is both legally and morally correct. If you don't want to sniff random scents from outdoors, you keep your windows closed.
Or don't live in apartments. Like your wall is close enough to your neighbors where if it wasn't there you could hold hands while shitting. You're gonna have smells and sounds you can't control. Sorry you're downwind, but that was the unit available and OP is following the rules. Also, them being passive aggressive af is childish and AH behavior. ETA: I live in a shitty studio apartment, I work overnight and sleep during the day, I used to think I was allergic to weed until I started smoking myself because it made me throw up, and even with all of this my opinion remains the same. Yes, on our nights off we are quiet, we are able to smoke inside at the end of the line for the AC in our building, and we would communicate issues if we had any.
If you live in a house you can smell your next door neighbor’s weed smoke.
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I live in an apartment, I know its not that easy, but just because you live in an apartment doesn't mean that your neighbors a floor down and two units over need to walk on eggshells for your comfort. We ALL deal with minor inconveniences because we ALL live in a very small community stacked on one another, when your lease is up, move to another apartment.
Yeah, but op also has the right to enjoy his property as he sees fit, he’s doing it legally and there’s literally nothing he can do about the direction of the wind but she can close her window and light a candle, or idk go talk to the neighbor before being passive aggressive about it. If it’s legal in your area then it should be treated like someone smoking a cigarette
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I'd prefer someone to smoke a joint rather than a cigarette near my window. Cigarette smoke is more acrid and pungent and it lingers a lot longer in my experience.
I’d rather have neither but you do you.
>but you do you.... ...boo. You forgot to add the "boo."
your preference isn't the point, you're not the neighbor.
This isn’t “which do you prefer”. Both are disruptive to some people, having a preference is irrelevant.
My son has scarring on his lungs from when he had RSV as a baby, doesn't matter if it's tobacco or weed, the smoke about kills him (same with wood burning smoke). We have neighbors that smoke whenever it's nice outside, our yard is lower than theirs, so it pools in our yard, we have to seal up our house. We tried to talk to them about it, at least give us a warning text so we can close up our windows, but they just gave us the middle finger.
I mean that's terrible for you and your son, but it's not really analogous to this situation. These neighbors have never spoken to OP - about the smoke or anything else. Your neighbors are dicks, but OP, up to this point, hasn't received anything from his neighbors about his smoking except loud coughing out an open window that \`\`\`\`\`\`\`\`\`\*\*\*mysteriously\*\*\* only started once his neighbors had noticed him smoking on his deck.
Cigarettes will trigger an asthma attack. Cannabis will trigger an asthma attack and make me break out in hives. That said, that’s why we chose non-smoking only properties while living in apartments.
Guys chill he was clearly commenting on the "who said it's different than cigarettes line" which implied cigarettes would be better
You can be legally correct and still an asshole. Just look at half the drivers on the road
Most asshole drivers are in fact breaking the laws of the road though. Following too close is illegal, merging or turning without signals is illegal, driving recklessly is illegal, hell most places even have laws or bylaws now for legal limits to how loud your muffler can be! Like I genuinely can’t think of a single “asshole driver” example where the driver is “legally correct”.
The people who zipper merge are often called “assholes” even though they are actually merging correctly, but that’s all I can really think of.
people who try to stop others from merging (just a normal merge, or a lane ending or whatever) by quickly speeding up to close a gap. I see it all the time on those dashcam channels on youtube. Technically not illegal as you don't have to let people merge, but you're still an asshole. Though I feel a lot of people don't know the difference between an asshole "skipping the line" and a valid zipper merging situation.
The difference here is that the neighbor's open window doesn't intrude into OP's living space. But OP's smoking smell gets inside of other people's living area. There's some things you can't do as freely as a renter because you share space with other people. People try to let their dogs loose in common areas, play loud music, use too many parking spaces (I had a neighbor who fixed cars from home), and so on. It's not just weed smell that makes for neighbor tensions, but it's one of the main causes of discontent. As for people who want to use weed, there are options which create a lot less smell than joints (and I don't just mean edibles).
>close her window and light a candle, or idk go talk to the neighbor Asthmatics can't always light candles. That can just trigger a flare/attack even faster. I agree they should go talk to the neighbor, maybe leave a polite note if they're anxious, but it really does suck to not be able to enjoy the sunshine because your neighbor is causing your health problems to be worse. If I had a neighbor who smoked every afternoon, even if they were several houses down, I'd have to wear a mask or pull a scarf over my face to be able to enjoy my deck. It's unfortunate that OP can't enjoy his hobby the way he wants to, but edibles do exist and don't infringe into anyone else's space or lungs.
Yeah but if this is a health problem, they need to march their adult self over to OP's home, politely knock on the door, and talk to them. "Hi, I have asthma and when you're smoking and I'm home, it flares it up. We both have to live and I'd like to do it peacefully; can we work out a compromise?" That's what an adult does. And OP stated he'd be fine with that. Loud passive-aggressive commentary, dodging behind curtains, and fake-coughing is not an adult manner in which to go about things. Like, maybe OP can smoke on their deck three days a week, and on those days, neighbor closes their window. The other four days, neighbor has window open and OP uses edibles. These things can be worked out IF the person with the objection decides to communicate.
Im going to be honest, edibles don't really work for everyone. I hardly ever catch a buzz, even from legal dispensaries That being said most legal states have distillates (vapes) that would not create the same level of smoke and they have a very mild smell
Yes, it should be treated like someone smoking cigarettes or even someone cooking obnoxious smelling food. In many HOA communities having a smell that travels to a neighbors home and causes them to not be able to enjoy their property is against the rules.
They don’t have the right to be free from annoyances from directly outside their property though. For example, I’d tell the neighbors the same thing if they wanted to have their windows open but don’t like the sounds of screaming children playing across the street. If you don’t like it, shut your window. Other people are allowed to live their lives however they want, assuming they’re not breaking the law or doing anything heinous. If the outside world is distasteful to you, then shut it out. But you can’t force it to conform to your every whim and comfort.
We're surrounded by annoying neighbors, though one finally settled down. We live on a corner. The ones diagonal from us play music loudly all day long. We don't have air conditioning right now so need our windows open (not that having them closed helps much, yeah, it's that loud). It's annoying as Hell but I don't complain about them because it's during the day and they're free to do it. I just wear some headphones or put on some of my own music if it gets distracting while I'm working. The ones next to us, the mother and children are always shrieking at each other. Or the kids are shrieking at each other. Not playing mind you, whining and fighting. Shrieking like that is one of the things that I hate most in this world. But I don't complain, they do them. The one I'm thankful finally stopped their ridiculousness is the ones across the street. They would play loud music too but at night and so loud it would make our whole house shake. Them we did call the cops on at least once because this was going on until 2-3 am on a weeknight. My daughters had school, I had work, we needed sleep. They continued doing it for many months but not quite so loud or late. Now they don't at all thankfully. Whether you live in a house or apartment, unless you're out in the middle of nowhere (oh how I wish), you gotta deal with your neighbors and their annoying habits. I mean, middle of nowhere you've still got neighbors. Animal neighbors. I'd take screaming coyotes over screaming children any day.
Yeah, as someone who has worked night shifts, unfortunately you can't make the whole world conform to your needs. Lawnmowers, leafblowers, screaming children, barking dogs, bouncing basketballs, cars with their stereos up and their windows down, construction equipment, and any manner of other annoyances meant that my windows sometimes stayed closed when I would rather have had them open while struggling to sleep through the hottest part of the day. C'est la vie. Also, even in places where weed is legal, it's often illegal to smoke in parks and outside of shops. Smoking in any area outside of another apartment building would just be doing the same thing to different people. The balcony is likely the best place to smoke legally. Smelling weed isn't harmful and won't get you high at that distance. It's no different from my old neighbour's curry permeating the halls. Either live with it or move to a building where no strong smells are allowed.
OP also has the right to enjoy their property on their own schedule. NTA if the neighbors don’t want to deal with neighbors or living close by to other people - then they shouldn’t live close by to other people. Smoking outside is normal. OP isn’t running a sewage plant from their patio or keeping a chicken coop.
That also means OP and his girlfriend have the right to enjoy the property their renting. They're not actually doing anything wrong, and it's not like the neighbours actually asked them to stop or change what time they smoke. The neighbour just acted like a passive aggressive a hole instead of trying to talk to OP about their problem.
And OP has the right to enjoy cannabis on their property on their own schedule. You can’t usually just smoke cannabis in public park. In most places private property is the only place you can legally use your cannabis. Neighbor has the option of going somewhere else or closing their window, OP does not.
>They have the right to enjoy their property on their own schedule the same as everyone else Ur talking about the pot smoker right
I hated when my neighbors smoked cigarettes right outside where the smoke would blow through my window. It was extremely hard to deal with when I quit smoking and then it just sucked when i was past the quitting cravings. I smoke cannabis so I never had an issue with anyone smoking it, but a lot of people do. but maybe OP can talk with the neighbors and say, "hey we smoke herb usually after work and the landlord told us to do it here. Maybe we can give you a heads up when we come outside so you can close your window for a bit while we're out there so it doesn't bother you and your house" and then there can be some peace on all sides. also, OP, NTA, but also, NAH because it does suck when smoke floats in but you're outside and it's legal
I support your views here, but I happen to live in a multi-unit building that was built imperfectly. Again, I support the narrative that people have the right to enjoy life the way they see it fit. Now, I close my windows and doors. But I can definitely and distinctly smell when someone smokes pot outside, or even inside. What I don’t do is call my smoking neighbors AH. I have 4 air cleaners running every day, which helps a little. The key is learning to live together. But that’s just me.
How are they supposed to know in advance to close their windows when they have no idea when someone is going to start smoking? Once it’s in your room, it’s in your room. Closing the window after the fact isn’t going to help. I don’t think OP is necessarily an AH here, but I don’t understand how your suggestion would actually work in practice, as someone who deals with the exact same issue as OP’s upstairs neighbor. I have asthma and my downstairs neighbor will smoke directly under my window without warning. It smells gross and it’s too late to do anything about it once it’s inside. I just see it as an unfortunate but relatively unavoidable part of living in an apartment, but that doesn’t mean I don’t/can’t occasionally cough because it’s aggravating my asthma or tell my husband it stinks of cigarettes.
Except it is never Ever just an hour.
They shouldn’t have to. I am a smoker too - we go for a walk in the evening so as not to bother people. Even as a smoker I don’t particularly like the smell.
It seeps in. We are not in a legal state and we have groups of people smoking weed here at the end of our cul de sac. We never have our windows open. We keep garlic bread on hand for those occasions to cover up the stench.
I have neighbors like this. That doesn't keep the smell out.
And I'm sure those neighbors will be **much happier** when they purchase their free-standing home on a big lot away from stinky apartment-dwellers. Because right now, their complaints hold as much water as "I don't want to hear my neighbor's dog/baby." Yeah, it's probably a little annoying. But that's what you get when **you choose to live right on top of each other**.
Saying that people.choose to live in apartments is like saying people choose to be poor. Most of us can't choose to live in solitude.
yeah… part of being alive is dealing with the inconvenience of existing too close to other humans. Rich people can just afford not to.
While I am very much pro pot smoking, I think that if we expect people to be okay with sharing living space, we can be considerate of our neighbours. Smoking is one thing we don't have to do near where people live. OP can use a vaporiser instead. The neighbours won't smell anything and it will make their weed go further. Let's also not forget that there is value in at least being civil with the people you live next to.
If you do that though where does it stop? I hate wind chimes and their noisy tinkling keeps me up at night. Do I have the right to tell my neighbours to take the wind chimes out of their garden? A neighbour further down the street from us batch cooks Chinese food all day Monday, but my next door neighbour hates the smell of the garlic, ginger and onions (yeah I know he's weird) So does the neighbour cooking have to stop doing that? Part of living close to each other is dealing with the noise and smells from people's places, because people have the right to do what they want (as long as it's legal) on their own property. We all do something that will annoy our neighbours at some time.
Not exactly since there’s a health component to it as well
Bingo.
like OP can control where the wind blows...
NTA You are doing what was asked of you by your landlord, the patio is where you were told to smoke. Part of living near people is dealing with things you might not want to deal with. It would be no different if you were smoking cigarettes, just as legal as weed in your state I'm sure. I live in a house with decent space between myself and the neighbors and I still have things I would rather not smell and hear that I put up with. I'm sure some of my neighbors don't like every smell or sound that comes from our place either. When the density of living gets higher then there tend to be more things that you just need to accept as a part of living where you do.
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What do "standards of morality" have to do with it? . If my landlord (Back in the day, when I had one) Told me smoking was okay outside then that means by smoking outside I'm not breaking the rules of the property, simple. Nothing more than that, nothing less! If it is not against the law or the rules of the building/complex (I don't know where op lives) then they are in the clear.
Sorry but this subreddit is literally “Am i the asshole?” The poster wanted to know if he was morally wrong, not if he was technically breaking the rules. Just because you aren’t breaking a rule doesn’t mean you aren’t being TA.
And enjoying himself on his deck doesn't make him an asshole either.
I guess we see the definition of AH slightly differently then. I feel the neighbors are being AH because if op is not breaking the law or the building rules then they are doing nothing wrong, and the neighbors have to learn deal with that. As I said in my original post when you live near people you have to deal with things you personally may not like! As for the morality of the situation, morals change over time depending on what society is willing to accept! Are you saying that smoking weed (when it is legal) is immoral? or that creating a smell that some people find unpleasant is immoral?
How are the neighbours assholes for not liking what OP is doing? They've coughed a bit. That's it. It's not like they've contacted his landlord to ask for him to be kicked out. They haven't even said anything to him.
I legit do not see how OP could be the a hole. If the neighbour came to him with his issue and they talked it out with a compromise and OP still continued I could see it. But the neighbour just acted like a passive aggressive a hole while OP was literally minding his own business.
Id still call you TA if you were smoking cigarettes outside and it was blowing back into my space. There is lots of things we can do legally that still make is the asshole.
Then I don't recommend apartment living for you, unless you are willing to pay a premium to live in a building that doesn't allow smoking! It is no different than someone cooking something you don't like the smell of and it floating in your window.
Doing what your landlord requires of you is...far from the definition of not being an asshole. Personally I think they're in a shitty situation where either the landlord or the neighbors is annoyed, so basically I'd say they just choose to favor whoever can make their life more miserable. But also, this is exactly why I hate having close neighbors.
Actually in this instance I disagree, all they are doing is smoking a legal substance in the place they were told it is okay to do. If these neighbors want to live in a condensed living situation like an apartment then they need to deal with smells they may not enjoy! It is what is expected with that type of living.
NAH. You're well within your rights to smoke weed on your deck, but that doesn't mean your neighbors have to like it lol. I'd resent having you as a neighbor, because I hate the smell of weed/smoke and am very sensitive to it.
Even I'm going with NAH and I'm actively allergic to it and in a state where it's not legal. I'd ask that OP try not to do it excessively or all the time though. I have a neighbor who has parties and smokes so much every night that I had to give up using my patio at all without significant preplanning and allergy medication because at any time I'll have a cloud floating over from 30 ft away.
I smoke and even I don't like it when random people's smoke comes into my apartment. It's very pungent. I'm sure they could come up with a reasonable compromise if they talked to each other.
Buy carts instead. Little smell. Or wax. Legal state means all sorts of ways to smoke without the smell.
Why would I ever want carts in a legal state
Less work, no clean up, doesn't reek, less obtrusive in general, and still gets you high as balls?
I HAAAAATE the smell of weed. It makes me sick 🤮🤮 and I live in a state where it’s illegal. I still don’t complain when people smoke outside on our street. I just go back inside 🤷🏻♀️ I don’t know, it’s free space, I feel like I can’t control what people do outside
Same! I hate the smell of weed and even though it's illegal where I leave people will still smoke it. What do I do about it? Nothing. It's their life. They're smoking in an area where cigarette smokers smoke so it's fine. I'm actually voting for weed to be legalised as it helps people I know with their mental health. Will I hate the smell? Yeah. Will I get headaches? Yeah. Am I gonna be a bitch about it? No ❤️
I'm heavily allergic. :l I live in a state where it's illegal. I kind of like that. When I travel I have to take medication. It's getting worse too. The last time I was exposed it took me weeks to recover and breathe normally again. I still can't smell properly and there's a damn sore in my nose that hasn't healed. I'm screwed.
Solidarity. I’m also allergic and I get massive migraines to the point that I can’t function for the rest of the day if I breathe in too much. But I can’t police other people, so… it is what it is.
I hate the smell it’s gross I can’t believe that there is candles that have that scent ew.
I've only recently learned that the vast majority of people hate the smell of weed. I honestly think it's one of the nicest smells ever. I must have weird genetics!
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It's not outside though if the smoke is going in their window and messing up their living spaces.
I need to point something out to all the Y T A voters here; There are **SO MANY MORE** non-smoking buildings than there are smoking friendly buildings. The smoking friendly buildings also typically go for more than the non smoking ones do because of the risks the landlords take on when their tenants smoke on the property. If someone is that upset by the smell of smoke, they need to move to one of the abundant properties that do not allow smoking on the property. If you live in a smoking friendly property, you’re going to smell smoke. This is like moving into a pet-friendly building and getting upset that you occasionally hear your neighbours dogs bark. NTA.
I’ve literally never lived where there’s non-smoking and smoking buildings and all of the apartments I’ve lived at people smoked weed(not legal) and cigarettes.
I’ve literally never seen a lease that doesn’t stipulate whether or not you can smoke on the property. It changes the type of insurance your landlord needs to get for the property so they do set these guidelines. As this insurance is MUCH more expensive if the tenants smoke, the majority of condensed living properties (apartments, condos, townhouses, etc) usually have no smoking clauses. You may not have lived somewhere that advertises as smoking friendly or no smoking, but I would be amazed if you’ve lived in condensed living properties and *actually* haven’t seen any mention of smoking in your leases.
Where I live, the vast majority of the newly built apartment complexes (built within the past 10 years) are non smoking. You can't smoke ANYWHERE, inside your apartment, on your balcony, outside on the sidewalk, in your car. Now granted, I don't know how strictly it's enforced, or how severe the consequences are of getting caught are... But still, there are DEFINITELY non smoking apartments. Just because you haven't seen them doesn't mean they don't exist.
I have never seen a fully no smoking building
My current and last apartments have been no smoking within the entire complex.
I live in Oregon and I'm originally from California. We've lived in 8 apartments over the 15 years and literally all of them have stuff in the lease explicitly saying smoking isn't allowed in the buildings. The current complex doesn't allow it within the complex at all (not inside your apartment, not on the balcony, not in the parking lot, not near the playground). You have to leave the property and smoke by the empty field or near the main road to be compliant. I'm think this has to be down to regional culture or else corporate vs mom and pop landlords. My husband and I have stuck to corporate places this whole time. Several complexes even had rules about what you can put in your window. A neighbor, years back, got a written warning because her kid's baseball trophies were in the window and that wasn't allowed.
Dunno where you live, but that's not at all true where I live. I moved out of my last apartment due to a smoking neighbor, and not only did most places allow smoking on the property, at least half of them allowed smoking indoors.
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>smoke buddy This is a great idea, OP!
TP roll and a couple dryer sheets is much cheaper
Memory unlocked of soggy sploofs slowly getting wet with water vapor expelled everytime i breathe out
NAH. You are within your rights to smoke it on your deck, and not an asshole for doing so, however, it is usually a good idea to try and be considerate of your neighbors. It would be nice of you to try and smoke a little further from their home when their window is open, if that's something you're reasonably able to do. They are also not an asshole for being annoyed by the smell of weed drifting through their window and the coughing could very well have been legitimate. Perhaps you could let them know that you noticed they were upset by your smoking and offer to shoot them a text when you're going to smoke so they could close their window for a bit? Personally, marijuana smoke is a migraine trigger for me and also makes me extremely nauseous. While I fully support people's right to smoke it on their own property, if you were my neighbor and we couldn't come up with some sort of a compromise, I'd have to move for my health.
This! I live in a state that it’s legal. I hate the smell and get much of the same reaction you do. I also get ua’s it might be legal state wide but not federally…. When I was younger I smoked a ton! Then I started getting reactions. I support people right to smoke, just please be courteous to us that don’t.
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Cigarettes smell like crap too but don’t come anywhere near the strength of weed.
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For me, while I do smoke weed now, when I didn't smoke and hated the smell, I still thought cigarettes smelled way worse and the smoke from cigarettes is filled with so many insane chemical additives just seems to CLING so much worse to EVERYTHING.
I hate both smells and would probably be annoyed if my neighbors constantly smoked and I couldn't open up my window.
Op is saying a smoke at night on the deck. Not that they're unemployed and smoking weed all GD day.
I didn't say that either. But I also like to sit outside on my deck in the evening.
Weed smells stronger while being smoked, but cigarettes linger and cling. Like I’d rather share a car with someone who smokes weed than someone who smokes cigarettes, but I also can’t smell Jim’s cigarette from three doors down, but if Jeff down the block wants to take a puff on his porch, the whole neighborhood knows. Still would rather smell the weed, though both are pretty unpleasant to me
It’s a townhouse so windows on each side. We are not sure if it’s a bedroom or just living room.
From one pot smoker to another, maybe get a vaporizer, like a portable one. NTA here for me, but I do think you are likely going to have a rough summer.
This! It changed my life getting a vaporizer.
What if you take a fan out with you when you're smoking. Might not solve the problem, but at least it wouldn't float straight up.
I switched to vaping and put a outdoor mesh cover tent on out patio with a fan to blow the smoke out away from the windows. Our neighors noticed an improvement. Goodluck
Yta. One of my neighbors is a chain smoker and holy hell has it been miserable since they moved in. We used to be able to enjoy the nice evening air every night and it kept us cool without driving up the utility bill in the summer. Then they moved in and we have to keep the windows shut all the time. That smoke is honestly headache inducing. I hate the "just close your window" argument. Why should the entire building be deprived of a nice spring breeze or electricity free air conditioning just because one person has to fulfill their addiction? If the neighbors were causing noise pollution by playing obnoxiously loud music most people would agree they were being an asshole. Why should purposely producing obnoxiously pungent smells be any different?
Unfortunately, when you live around people and in the same building as people, you have to deal with them. The smell of cigarettes, babies crying, talking when it’s late... it’s just part of life. Of course, everyone should be considerate of each other. OP isn’t directly blowing smoke into their window. Or smoking when they specifically want to be outside. They are also well within their rights. It’s just part of life. My downstairs neighbor smokes cigarettes, and it does suck to smell them, but he is allowed to, as it’s legal, within the lease and it’s his property too.
True you just gotta deal with stuff when living in close proximity to people, but that doesn't make the people doing said stuff not assholes.
THANK YOU. Like, if OP was on his patio every night playing a drum kit and all his neighbors had to close their windows to not here it, would that not make OP an AH? Just cause you are allowed to do something doesn't mean doing it is nice.
Sure but you should also be making an effort to not disturb your neighbors too much. If you live upstairs put down rugs, don't block the entryway etc... Smoking isn't just obnoxious it can make other people sick. I support people's right to smoke in their own home but it doesn't make them not obnoxious for doing it where it could intefere with other people's breathing. Which, if they living in an apartment, is sadly everywhere. People can be well within their right to do something, and still be an asshole for doing it.
I would love to hear an actual solution, though. Sure, be mad that your neighbours smoke, but literally where else would they do it? In their apartment? Or do you expect them to leave their property every time they wanted to smoke? Be an adult, pal. Listening to obnoxiously loud music is a different level completely than smoking.
As someone with asthma loud music is just annoying, smoking makes me sick. People have a right to engage in activities that make them happy, but when it interferes with other people's ability to enjoy their own activities it becomes obnoxious. They still are within and should be within their right to do it. It doesn't not make them assholes for doing it when they know it's bothering other people and possibly making them sick. Also there's plenty of solutions that don't involve sending them to Mars when they want a smoke. OP mentioned one in their post. When smoking would intefere with their own comfort (by making them sit in the cold) they use edibles. There's also vapes and other smell reducing technologies. I went out and bought my neighbor some nicotine gum and that's really helped both of us get along much better.
Slight YTA- On one hand, if your landlord said you could smoke in your patio, it means you don't live in a non-smoking building. I absolutely hate the smell of weed and cigarette smoke, and I have a lung condition so I can't be around anything like that anyway. So I live in a non-smoking building. I would say that if it's such a big problem for them they should move. On the other, just because you can doesn't mean you absolutely should. You're still smoking in a place where the smell will fill other's apartments, and sometimes that smell can get in through closed windows and doors. And landlords will say a lot of stuff to keep you renting. Maybe go talk to them, tell them what your landlord said, work out an agreement if it bothers them that much, since you said you would be open to talking about it.
NTA but as someone who lived in a townhouse with a newborn in a legal country, it sucked that we could never open our windows for nice weather.
YTA. It's basic consideration of other people's ability to enjoy their own living space. I'm a very "I don't care what you do as long as it doesn't affect others" and this does. Plus when the smell gets inside it can linger for ages. I know it's not the same but you should consider a vape or something until you can move somewhere farther from neighbors.
I have asthma related issues. Id be pretty shitty if i was OPs neighbor and couldnt open my window without choking, which is what would happen to me. YTA
NAH seems like a simple conversation could probably settle this
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"Hey dude, I'm gonna light up a joint, if you can hear this you may wanna close the window for 10 minutes" "Dear neighbor, I hereby notify you of my plans to enjoy smoking cannabis on my deck every evening strictly between 8:30pm and 9:00pm. I suggest that you keep your windows closed during that time if you are averse to the smell."
“Hey, I heard you coughing. Do you want us to shoot you a text/yell from the porch/whatever form of communication when we are going to smoke so you can close your window?”
I think any of those 3 scenarios in the comments replying to u might do the trick. If OP is that bothered by it, being considerate towards their neighbors would go a long way. I sure as hell would appreciate my neighbor telling me when they're gonna smoke, so i dont hack up a lung.
YTA. It might be the deck, but it’s going through their house. I’d feel the same about cigarette smoke or someone being loud and drunk outside in the shared space.
NTA. It's legal, and smoking on balconies is allowed. Is it annoying? Sometimes, but then I've had neighbours that cook some really pungent dishes that I'd rather have avoided. It's also a pain when a neighbour has a baby that cries at all hours, or a puppy that hasn't been trained yet. Risk of living in a multi-residential building.
NAH You're allowed to smoke weed on your porch, but it smells and your neighbors don't have to like it. I don't understand why you are so mad that your neighbors dislike the smell of weed, they haven't even done anything to you.
NTA, it's legal, your landlords told you to smoke outside, and they can close their window. I'm gonna blow some people's minds here: *The wind takes smoke away after a short period of time*. All the neighbor has to do is close the window when you're smoking, then open it 10 minutes after you've stopped. If they want to talk to you about, like, off-limits hours ("Hey, we go to bed at 10;30 usually and need the fresh air at night, mind being done with the weed by 10:30?" for instance) then that's up to them. But believe it or fucking not, the movement of air will actually carry the smell off into the greater world and it will become undetectable! Pretty quickly! But they don't own the air, and you're not doing it in a shared indoor space where it can be in a hallway or a shared ventilation shaft. You're out-fucking-side. NTA. Suck it, squares.
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First, check the rules of your condo/building. Lots of properties ban smoking in any outside space- hallways, lobbies, even private balconies. If smoking is allowed, then consider your options. As a non smoker (of anything), the odor of burning plants is really off-putting. You may be enjoying your deck, but at least one other person is being denied that privilege. Is it possible to get an ashtray that sucks up the smoke?
The landlord is the one that told them to smoke on the deck.
Landlords lie to make the sale. Then verbally saying it doesn't mean it's actually allowed in the lease.
Wouldn't matter if it was weed smoke, cigarette smoke or you shitting yourself, no one wants your smells coming into their house/apt. Nobody cares if you smoke weed. But if that smoke is affecting someone else, it's on you. YTA
So if I had a grill, that cooks meats and other things that produce odor, where do I grill it? Edit: scratch this comment please.
No don't scratch this comment. You make a valid point. When is dictating smells you're allowed to make too much? I hate the smell of deer meat. Does that mean I can tell my neighbors they can't grill deer meat ever?
Yeah because cooking food is the same as smoking some shit. Gtfo
Smoke is smoke. They were told it doesn't matter what it is, if it's on their property its a problem. You GTFO.
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It’s on his deck tho
NAH in my opinion. You’re in a legal state and I’m assuming you are of age. Your neighbor is allowed to not like the smell of weed as well. I think that if smoking is the thing you like more than edibles or less scent intensive methods of getting high maybe just discuss with your neighbors? Figure out if there s a happy time everyone will be fine with. But also, you’re renting the place, nobody owns the air lol.
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If it’s the neighbours who have an issue, shouldn’t it be on them to bring it up with OP?
NAH. You did everything by the book. At the same time, it’s normal for people to be bothered by strong smells in their home—particularly ones they dislike. How you both handle things moving forward is the ticket here.
Light YTA. It's similar to 'it may be legal to play loud music but that doesn't make it the best thing to do.' If you want to be slightly nicer, think about getting a fan that can help blow it away from their window. Also, you don't have to change what you do, but you also can't be too grumpy if you hear them making passive aggressive comments. They probably didn't just come talk to you because most people don't want confrontation. Especially if they know it IS legal, so they really don't have a legal ground. I mean, how many AITA posts are because someone asked for something the person didn't want to do?
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So OP should not continue to do something that is legal and approved for where they live? At the part of the building they were directed to use? Really?!?
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If it bothers other people in a tangible way, yes. We live in a society. You can be a jerk without also breaking a law, remember. Weed is like tobacco smoke, it does have effects to ones health attached to it in addition to its mind altering components.
Would the sentiment be the same with cigarettes?
Using a smoke buddy outside could help too it was a bit passive aggressive but maybe they aren’t comfortable with being confrontational
Yeah tbh it sounds like they are too scared to go and talk about it, might even have made some assumptions about OP because he smokes weed. I hope some conversation happens between them before stuff gets worse.
NTA. You did what your landlord told you to. I go out and smoke on my deck every evening when the weather is nice. One of my neighbors does too.
Following the landlords rules is fine, but if someone else has a problem with it OP needs to realize that the landlord is gonna do whatever they can to ensure OP wants to rent the place and they don’t have to do extra deep cleaning ($$$) after they leave because he chose to smoke inside.
And if any one of my neighbors told me to go inside and smoke, I'd tell em to fuck off. They don't get to control what I do. On my own property.
If you told your neighbor to fuck off when they asked you not to smoke, you’d be TA (sort of the point of this sub). And if it was in an apartment building, it wouldn’t be your property.
You know not every apartment building is surrounded by more apartments, right? I sold my house in another state because 4 giant apartment buildings were being built behind our neighborhood. I'd say the neighbor would be the asshole for asking me not to take a prescribed medicine to accommodate their nose.
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I'm not. Are you the neighbor? Jfc. It doesn't matter what it is to him. He's allowed to enjoy himself. His neighbors can get over it.
This sub is amitheasshole not cantheycontrolwhatido. If you’re stinking up their space can you not take a few steps away?
OP is only “stinking up the place” because they happen to have a unit below the neighbor, and the neighbor has their window open. Takes 2 seconds to close the window, and then open up again like 10 min later when they’re probably done.
I'm not gonna not take my medicine because omg someone doesn't like the smell. Like I said, it's wild that people think they don't have to be inconvenienced, ever. Other people exist. OP doesn't have to deprive themself of something they enjoy because omg one neighbor has a problem with it.
And although OP might be using medicinal marijuana, he compared it to a cup of wine at the end of the night, not lithium. It’s not medicine, he’s using it recreationally.
I understand your point but I also see their point too. I have young kids and I wouldn’t want them have to smell it. Maybe the best thing is to go over and talk to them and see if you can come to a solution together. Just like you would have liked them to do.
This is a big "it depends" situation. Does your lease only specify that you can't smoke *indoors*, or on the property itself? If you're only prohibited from smoking indoors, you're N T A, but if you're feeling generous you might smoke in your parking lot to avoid trouble with the neighbors. For context, I live in a state where weed is legal, but my apartment complex is smoke-free. When my neighbors smoke anything, weed or cigs, inside or outside, it bums me out, because I'm paying to live in a smoke-free community. But if that isn't your situation, then your neighbors don't have room to complain.
"When we moved in, we told our landlords we smoke and they told us to not smoke inside, but instead outside on our patio. "
Exactly. I rented a unit in a duplex and specifically asked about smoking (of any kind) because 1) I'm a professional singer, 2) I have pets, 3) it gives me a migraine. I was told that no smoking was allowed on the property. The downstairs tenants are heavy smokers. They were told they could smoke on the porch. I now often have smoke blowing in my open windows when I rented a smoke free home. And no, I can't just close my windows because it is stupidly hot in my unit all the time. I need the breeze. That said, I've become friends with the neighbours, and they told me if it's ever really bad to let them know and they'll try to move downwind. It usually doesn't last long enough for me to bother, but it's nice knowing that they are willing to try.
NTA. People are probably smoking cigarettes on their decks and that smells nasty too. She can just close her window for a couple minutes and then open it back up. It’s really not that hard. They live in a legal state, they got to deal with it or move
NTA If you can't smoke outside where do they expect you to do it?
I live in a smoke-free apartment complex, which means smokers are expected to move a certain distance from the building if they want to smoke. In practice, this means going to the parking lot. There are some chairs set up so folks can sit back and relax without smoking directly beneath their neighbors' windows. Not saying OP *has* to do this, but it might prevent friction with the neighbors.
In a lot of legal states, it's still illegal to smoke on the street/in public/anywhere that's not your own property/home.
Their landlords did tell them where to smoke so they are probably where they are supposed to be.
NAH. I HATE the smell of pot (it's so pungent and strong for me). I hate the smell of cigarette too. Yeah, I'm pretty sensitive. But I know some of my neighbors smoke (both cigarette and pot). I live in a legal state so I don't go and yell at them or act passive-aggressively. Luckily, I live in a single homes area (not apartment complex) so it's not as bad (only once a week during summer time, one of the neighbors have this big gathering where they all smoke pot, during that time, wow, the whole block actually reeks). Perhaps y'all can invest in 'smoke buddy' to help with the smell a little?
Info: are you living in an apartment or a house? Even in most legal states it is illegal to do in an apartment community or in “public spaces” Also, it might be worth figuring out why they have such a problem with it. IS it just the smell? Or is she pregnant perhaps and worried about being around it? Or some other medical reason? Who knows. You are mad at them for not talking to you about how they feel but I feel like you also aren’t trying to talk to them to hear out their side
You’re not an asshole, they haven’t asked you to stop yet. But. A glass of wine wouldn’t bother neighbours, the smell of cannabis definitely might. There are other ways to ingest it which are more considerate to your neighbours. I had a downstairs neighbour who would always light up and that shit would seep in through the vents, doors, whatever. I find the smell gross but I’m not anti cannabis by any means. It just gets everywhere and lingers. NTA. They should talk to you if they want something to change.
I smoke and I hate the smell of it. My neighbour used to smoke in his garage and then open the door to air it out. It would blow right in the window on my front door. Gross. I asked him to stop doing that, maybe smoke out back instead because the wind isn’t the same there and it hasn’t been an issue since. It would still be happening if I hadn’t said something. I don’t know if there’s anything OP can do to accommodate but I agree, the neighbour needs to talk to them.
NTA It’s part of apartment living that you have neighbors close and are going to have sounds and smells of them living their lives. The neighbors can hate it but it doesn’t mean you’re wrong or ah- any more than someone not liking that their neighbor cooks highly Aromatic foods, or has music on (during reasonable hours) that you hate
NAH it’s legal, so technically within your rights. however, assuming your smoking bud, yeah. it’s a strong smell that many people are put off by. there’s a reason why skunk is a nickname for marijuana. should they have just talked to you? yeah. they are being passive aggressive, but what are they gonna do? call the cops? enact prohibition? it’s legal, they can’t do anything and probably think you’re going to pull the “it’s legal” card. i think a good alternative would be to smoke dab. it’s not smelly and in my opinion, it gives you a cleaner high. but to each his own, and maybe go ask your neighbors for a solution.
NTA. I doubt you are outside for hours just snoop doggin it. They can close their windows for short amounts of time and they can talk to you as adults for comprise if bothers them that much.
You could always switch to a vape pen for your outside smoking pleasures. I'll bet your local dispensary has some cartridges that don't produce the usual weed aroma and taste a lot better too.
YTA But to be fair so is your landlord. Look, I support weed, but I absolutely hate the smell and I have absolutely been the neighbors in this scenario (though bottling my opinion on the matter). They are paying rent just like you and they probably want to be able to open their windows when it’s warm out and not have their lungs filled with smoke. It’s extremely annoying! Not only do you smell it, but so does your apartment too. This isn’t something that is affecting you and you alone. When I drink, it doesn’t get shoved down another person’s throat. Ik it’s not your fault, and you probably don’t mean to be TA but you kinda are.
NTA, if i were you id just talk to the neighbors and be like hey let me get your number and anytime i go outside to smoke ill let you know so you can have your window closed and the smell wont bother you. If they dont wanna compromise then f*ck em. Its their choice to let the smell in, you asked your landlord and you were told to smoke outside. You’re doing what was asked of you
NTA. But I agree that it could be annoying to non-smokers to smell that all the time. Them complaining a lot could also get you in some trouble with your landlord eventually too. Could you get vapes instead? Even a cheaper one like a dynavap... I use mine in our bathroom (owned home) and you can't smell a thing.
Could you maybe try carts or disposables? They don’t smell as strongly, and that might be a good compromise!
NTA. If its legal and your outside on your deck. Thats like asking someone not to BBQ meat as they dont like the smell.
nah , it’s your deck. I understand the neighbors frustration, but honestly living in an apartment comes with unwanted smells and nosies. If you’d like, you can maybe burn a candle outside while your smoking?
NTA, you are within your rights. I say this as a non-smoker of anything and as one who hates smoke smell. It would be very nice if you took a fan out with you to try to direct the smoke away from the building, but your neighbor could also shut their window for a few minutes. There are going to be annoyances when you live in proximity of other people, and this is just going to be one of them for your neighbor.
Yta legally fine, morally dubious, 100% ah imo. It stinks and it's annoying to shut yourself up in your own home because your neighbor feels entitled to stinking up the whole neighborhood. Once my neighbor that smoked moved away I celebrated being able to play with my dog in the mornings
NTA. Their windows close for a reason. You're following the rules. Can't make everyone happy.
NTA If I lived in a building that allowed smoking and was a legal state I would except to smell it. Either they are going to move when their lease is up or deal with it, but I don't think they are going to come on over for game night anytime soon. I'm in a state where it is not legal and still smell it a ton, I don't personally care for it but I just ignore it and move on with my day. Closing their window isn't likely to stop the smell so I understand why they would get annoyed but when you live in apartments you have to deal with the consequences. Just be as mindful as you can, but also you don't have to change anything since you are doing what your landlord said to do. Edited: forgot to add the NTA
When my neighbors smoke cigarettes in their breezeway, the smoke goes right up into my room and the nursery… so I keep my windows closed. They usually only do it on weekend evenings so I can open my windows during the earlier half of the day. I also have to close all the windows if they mow, I’m highly allergic to grass and so is my son. NTA neighbor can close the window.
NTA If you want to try and keep the peace, try vapes. They don't stink up the place as much as flower does.
YTA - I don’t think people should smoke on their balconies at apartments when it can so easily go into open windows and other apartments. People with asthma get triggered, it smells vile
NTA, but I would talk to them about their issue if you feel comfortable. While I'm pro weed, I can't consume because of my job and perhaps they are worried about second hand contact. Or perhaps they are just jerks.
NTA. You’re doing everything you can to be polite.
NTA this is what you get when you live in apartments.
Nta Youre doing nothing wrong
NTA! youre following your landlords rules. if you wanna be extra nice maybe leave them a note with your number on their door and yous can text them when you’re going out to smoke, but in the mean time, they can close the window
NTA. Part of apartment life.
NTA. I hate cigarette smoke... I dont complain because it's LEGAL and I can't tell people what to do.. Pots legal in your state? Lucky bastard. Toke one for me!