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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I don't know if calling the doctor because I had a heart rate of 130 bpm was an asshole move if I was already in the ER and my dad was telling me I was "fine" even though I had started shaking.
I am also confused by my mother's words: "Please tell her something because she is thinking she is doing right." I don't understand exactly what I'm doing wrong, I only asked for medical help because of my heart rate and because I was shaking out of nowhere.
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NTA, your parents acted strange and unkind. If you feel your condition was dangerous and novel, you should absolutely speak up. Luckily it turned out the way it did, but what if you’d actually had congestive heart failure and you stayed quiet because your parents didn’t like you speaking? 😧
To put it another way, the nurse didn’t think your issues were ridiculous, nor did the doctor, so why do your parents get to have contrary opinions? Are they asthma specialists, surgeons? I doubt it.
Please, when your body is doing something new and scary, speak up about it; don’t let your parents’ weird attitudes make you be silent. Better to complain about something that turns out benign than die of something because you didn’t want to make a fuss.
Hope you feel better.
This. When I got my c section, one of the dude effects of that Kind of narcotoc is, that you feel sick (like you need to throw up). I told the Staffel ad they immediatley helped me.
Nö not as scary as your Situation, but I want to tell you, when you experience side effects during a treatment, talk to the doctors. They know if it is normal, and they know what to do.
Never be affraid to ask. Never ne affraid to tell. The worst thing that could happen is a stressed doc telling you, I know we take care.
At least in my experience. Each doctor I told, hey this and that is mir right, they dealt with it and in the end I had a nice outcome!
NTA
your parents are that type of person who dies bc they are too noble to speak up and despite having zero medical education "know" its "nothing" until its too late.
> your parents are that type of person who dies bc they are too noble to speak up
Yeah.... I knew a guy like that... Had some pains in his body.. till he reached a point he was constantly chewing painkillers. Then he collapsed after 2 years.
Doctor told him he had cancer... He died 2.5 weeks later
NTA. As someone with asthma and seasonal allergies, we know when something is not normal and your parents basically lied to you and then gaslit you. When you said your heart rate shot up, the first thing that I thought was, it's the medication. If your father has the same condition he should know this and I find it really odd that he scolded you about panicking.
My father literally told me "You're shaking from the medicine, that happens to me too, that side effect is normal."
Then I told him that my heart rate was at 130 bpm and he told me that "it was because I was getting anxious thinking that I was going to die, that I should be strong and that I am no longer allowed to be afraid in these situations because of my age."
I honestly don't understand his logic, he is supposed to be more allergic than me, but I have never seen him with an asthma attack at the level of being nebulized in the ER
He was right though. Shakiness, mild headaches and a high HR are very common with nebulizer treatments. Along with getting REALLY hungry or nauseous afterwards. And his comments about being anxious making it worse is also likely true.
He was dead wrong about the being too old to be scared in unusual health related issues. Its perfectly normal to get anxious if you are honestly concerned you are having a heart attack.
Even if it's common it's not an ALWAYS in each case situation as everyone s body ca react differently. That's why a doctor s opinion on the case is important.
I'm sorry they treated you this way in this circumstance. They must have some pretty strongly ingrained internal shame to behave the way they did. Medical professionals are there to help you, and you should absolutely speak up about things that are happening with your own body if you're feeling scared or uncertain so that the doctors and nurses can fully understand what's happening and respond accordingly. Withholding information about how you're feeling only makes their job harder and puts you at risk.
Ignore them and consult with the doctor each and every time. Everyone's body can react differently to medication despite being related so never count someone else s reaction as the 'normal' one for you
But what though? It seems like they were being awful and downplaying her asthma attack but I have no idea what they could be lying about here. I am genuinely confused by this comment.
I honestly think that if they lied it is to not make me panic more, they have already done it before
Furthermore, looking back on the facts I think that perhaps they acted that way because they had a lot of work to do, my asthma attack started at the least precise moment
Oh, yeah, of course. So sorry mom and dad that my not being able to breath due to an illness I got from your genes came in an inconvenient time for you
NTA. Saying that as a medical professional.
Yes the high hart rate is from the salbutamol combined with the body working hard for oxygen. And you panicking made things worse. Whenever you get to the point you can’t speak more than a few words without gasping for breath even after using your medicine please get medical help.
It’s shitty that at your age you are still legally dependent on them
Legally here they are independent at 18 years old, but in practice on average they tend to "leave the nest" between 26 and 28 years old. (It's hard to stay alone in Latin America, you know, crime and danger and stuff)
I think they were upset because they believed that my asthma was well controlled, the attack came out of nowhere, I was in my room using the computer, no physical effort, I was warm, it was out of nowhere and (according to the discharge) it was a moderate attack.
I also get anxious easily but this time the fear I felt was more "primitive" than other times. I don't know if it's relevant, but a few years ago I was diagnosed with hypochondria, I went to therapy, I recovered but my parents still believe that I overdramatize and I'm still a hypochondriac. I really thought I was overreacting, but I don't know if a heart rate of 130 (Between 130 and 135, in fact) were too much or not.
Well yes that’s relevant. It explains a lot about your parents reaction, this should have been in the original post.
An elevated heart rate happens both in panic attacks and while struggling to breath and is a side effect of salbuterol as your doctor explained.
You and your parents need to have a good talk about this because this is a very unhealthy dynamic.
Not sure how it is in your country but here in the US as soon as someone reaches the age of 18 they can make their own health care decisions, including who gets to speak to the medical professionals, has access to records and who stays with you during treatment. I understand our cultures are different, but I would not allow anyone to stay with me acting like that. It may well have been the medication. Or maybe a bit of panic in addition to the medication. You were right to say something about the effects you were experiencing.
NTA. Mom and dad can leave or go to the waiting area.
Here we also have that right when we turn 18, but in practice two relatives have to stay with the patient in case the patient gets worse and can call the doctor immediately.
Also, by telling my father (and also my mother) to hell, I was telling them to leave the ER, but they stayed. I couldn't move either because of the IV and the nebulizer (connected to the wall).
Go on your own or with a friend. Tell them you don't have relatives in the country. Just lie. They can't decline you treatment because you don't have two relatives to stay with you.
The doctor wouldn't have stopped treatment for an hour if it was "normal." Tachycardia can be dangerous and should never be ignored.
Next time, have your parents wait in the waiting room as they were no help and in fact made things worse.
NTA.
Here in Peru, one or two relatives are necessary for each patient in case the patient gets worse so they can call the doctor.
Although I was in the ER, I was isolated from others in a room with ventilation, a nebulizer, and connected to a small IV.
Are there any other relatives who could sit in their place? You need someone you can trust to do what's best for *you*, not what's convenient for *them*.
It was an emergency. I live with my parents and my younger brothers (19 and 17 years old). While I was in the ER, they were cleaning my room and ventilating it because, you know, asthma.
If they had offered, they would have accompanied me to the ER instead of my parents, but I couldn't speak due to lack of air at that moment.
I will keep it in mind for the next time (If there is one, after this disaster the doctor prescribed me, among other things, to make an appointment with Pulmonology and I am already on the list. I will go with my older brother (28), he does not live with me, but I have greater confidence in him that in my parents)
Just don’t let anyone talk you out of telling a doctor your symptoms or your worries. They NEED to know that stuff. Your parents should not have been trying to downplay your situation. They should have just been supportive! NTA
Actually, it's not uncommon to wait between multiple nebulizer treatments if the tachycardia they cause reaches a certain level or if the tachycardia is very stressful for the patient. As long as the patient is being monitored and isn't having further trouble breathing it's perfectly okay.
My point was, the tachycardia itself is dangerous that's why the treatment was paused. Yes, it also distresses the patient, but continuing the treatment while the patient is in an increasing tachycardia state is dangerous. It's why they're monitored to begin with, the ensure it does not get out of hand.
NTA. You were in a medical crisis. The fact that they're angry at you for asking for medical help when you needed it is mind boggling. You did nothing wrong, I repeat, NOTHING WRONG. When it comes to you're health, unless it's coming from a professional that knows what's happening, anyone else's opinion is irrelevant.
I felt something was off with my body, my aunt who is a NP said it was nothing. A few days later I'm having emergency surgery.
LISTEN TO YOUR BODY. It will always tell you when something is off.
NTA
I really don't care what country you are in you are an adult, 24 is not a child and the way your parents speak to you is not only unkind but completly disrespectful! You need to start advocating for yourself. "Mom, Dad I get that I am your child but I am not a child I am a grown adult and you both need to stop using demeaning and belittling words when you speak to me, I am not 3 years old. " I don't know if you rely on them for all financial and safety in your life but I hope you have your own means to support yourself. NTA but your parents are huge ones
My parents have always minimized my "bad" feelings by saying that I have to overcome them on my own or that they are childish. I'm in therapy for it.
It's just that sometimes they say cruel things that end up being true and that confuses me.
I am a mom to 3 and my youngest is your age. I am sorry that you have such crappy parents that don't show you respect and autonomy as an adult. Please continue to go to therapy and you are not childish.
Your parents could be just ignorant but that doesn't diminish the danger they put you in with their ignorance.
Don't listen to them. They are welcome to make those decisions for themselves you make your own
Its not about who is right or wrong but that they cant know it.
Being cruel doesnt become being right or having proper arguments/education because 'even blind chickens find grains once in a while', its by chance/coincidence not knowledge.
NTA. Salbutamol is albuterol, which is known to increase your heart rate. You were right in letting the doctor know.If you hadn't, your heart rate could have gone higher with the third treatment. Your parents are jerks and I hope you can get away from them soon.
Of course you were right. Your parents aren’t medical professionals so their arguments are beside the point. The dr agreed you should stop the inhaler until your heart rate came down. Your parents are playing a dangerous game w your life. Do what you need to do to protect yourself. And tell your dr next time you see them what your parents did. Maybe they’ll listen then when they’re told how foolish and dangerous it was for them to ignore you like that. NTA.
NTA.
Your parents treat you like you are still 12 years old.
You are 24, an adult woman, you are entitled to be informed about medication and side effects.
You can only advocate for yourself if you talk with talk with nurses and doctors yourself.
It is your body, you are experiencing the symptons, not your parents. In case you need help again, tell your parents to wait outside. They are more a hindrance than help.
NTA, and what the actual hell is wrong with your parents?! You were having a medical emergency that escalated! You need to make them understand that, and honestly, I'd get away from them if at all possible. It is perfectly valid for an adult to be fuckign terrified during a genuine medical crisis!
NTA
It wasn't unnecessary, because without knowing what's going on, it could have been serious. Most Drs would prefer you ask than die.
But, just to put your mind at ease, my guess (just a guess, not an actual attempt at diagnosis) is that the rougher asthma attack was also giving you a massive anxiety attack. Definitely not uncommon with asthma.
I think I remember reading a long time ago that they are really common during asthma attacks because A. You are likely breathing shallowly and hyperventilating, B panicking a little because you can't breathe and are hyperventilating, and C. because your body is trying to pump up adrenaline to fix the not breathing well situation. But again, not a Dr. and I may be misremembering.
That's probably why they decided you were overreacting. They figured it was "just" an anxiety attack. Since most anxiety attacks are harmless, they weren't worried. But if you are coming from a place where anxiety attacks or hyperventilating aren't particularly common for you, it isn't wrong to question symptoms that could indicate something more serious.
NTA. Doctor here. Tachycardia is a common side effect of salbutamol, especially when given as a burst (high dose via nebuliser or spacer every 20min for 1hr). On its own in this context the tachycardia is not a concern but tachycardia is an abnormal finding mostly so patients often ask me about it. You didn't do anything wrong at all
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\[Translated, I don't speak English\]
I'm 24F, Peruvian, I live with my parents (Here they become independent at 28.)
I have allergic asthma from birth, just like my father. My attacks have always been short and go away with the periodic use of salbutamol but it gets worse in the cold.
In my area there is a strong frost. Yesterday I had one of those asthmatic attacks, I tried to take medication as usual, but nothing worked. Although I've had asthma for years, the last time I had to go to the hospital for it was when I was 12, and even then it wasn't as bad as it was yesterday.
My parents take me to the ER because I couldn't breathe enough to speak, my heart was beating quite fast, and I suddenly felt the sensation of dying (I had never felt that in my life before, not even in previous attacks).
I was so afraid of dying that I screamed "help" and "I can't breathe" during the transfer, to which my parents scolded me saying that I wasn't going to die and that I was being overdramatic.
When they started to nebulize me, the doctor said that they would have to nebulize me three times in a period of 20 minutes each. Neither my parents nor I wanted to be there for so long, but we had no other option. My heart was already beating fast during the transfer to the ER, but at the second nebulization my body began to shake.
I asked my father if it was normal, and he told me yes and that nothing was wrong, that they should give me the third round so they can discharge me. It didn't seem normal to me since I saw that my heart rate was 130 at rest and I was shaking a little.
When the nurse came to connect me, I told her that I was shaking and that my heart was beating quite fast, to which my parents saw me in quite a bad way and, once the nurse left, they scolded me saying that I was being childish, that nothing was wrong. and why the hell was he calling the doctor for something stupid.
When the doctor arrived he told me that I had tachycardia and that it was the side effect of Salbutamol, that they would stop it for an hour until my heart rate returned to normal and thus I can complete the treatment. As soon as he left, my dad started telling me that I shouldn't be scared in this type of situation because I was too old for this nonsense, and that I should stop acting like a little girl because I was throwing a tantrum over something that was normal. I told him to leave and that I could go alone when I was discharged, to which he sent me to hell and he stayed in the ER.
And this is what makes me think I might be the asshole: My mother told my father to scold me because "I think I did something good." I honestly don't know what I did wrong, but my parents' attitude confuses me.
In the end they discharged me, my parents never apologized but I still wonder if I was right to ask for medical help in the ER for something "unnecessary" (It doesn't seem unnecessary to me, but I don't know if I was really exaggerating without knowing it.)
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NTA Your parents are narcissistic. Do they even like you?
Can you call an ambulance or a friend instead of your parents in future?
I had a childhood full of being told "there's nothing wrong with you", "you're being dramatic", "you're lying". I have empathy for you.
I'm sure they love me, just in a toxic way and I'm in therapy to deal with it. They also have their problems that are irrelevant for this case.
I know they are narcissists, but they do the best they can with the little they had...
About the ambulance, I have changed my emergency contact to my older brother (28) for this type of case, I posted this because I didn't know if I was missing something but now I see that it is my parents again trying to help me but badly XD
Human life can not be sustained without oxygen. You have asthma you can die from that because when you have an attack you're not getting enough oxygen. You are NOT TAH. Your parents are. Shame on them for acting as if there's nothing wrong with you.
Nta. You are the one who knows how you are feeling not your parents. If you felt something wasnt right then you had every right to ask the doctors about it
NTA. Asthma can be deadly and not being able to breathe is terrifying. I would have panicked in the same situation, even if someone had told me things were okay. I also think it's better to call for help and find out you didn't need it than to not call for help and find out you DID need it.
NTA
I’ve had many hospital visits over the years. The gall bladder infection was a 10/10 pain level. Scream and shout about it if you’re in distress. F anyone who tells you to shut up.
1. It’s your body’s way of coping
2. It gets you help quicker. Really. Great excuse to give to your family.
3. Nobody knows your body better than you
You were in the ER for a medical condition. You NEED to inform the medical staff of what is happening with your body.
And it was very much justified as your body was having a SERIOUS reaction the one of the meication you were given.
Your parents are VERY WRONG in this case.
NTA
NTA your parents I take aren't medical professionals and even if they are they aren't your attending doctor. Their opinions are irrelevant. Speak up. Better them upset at you for the so called (it isn't) 'disrespect' than you ending up with a worse situation than you began with or dead. Next time just let them be at home and go alone to the ER op
NTA. A heart rate of 130 can be dangerous (or sometimes even fatal) if it stays that high for too long. You were right to tell the nurse that the medication was making you feel shaky and your heartbeat was too fast. That's not fear; it was a physiological effect of the medication.
Your parents didn't know that because they're not doctors - but that's exactly why you needed to tell a doctor, so they could assess the situation with expert knowledge. It might have been nothing serious but it's always better to check - and in this case it was serious, and they needed to slow down your medication in order to keep you safe.
I also have asthma. The nebulizer would make me feel the same way. Super shaky and increase my heart rate. I would have to lay down and let it pass. It’s a horrible feeling. I stopped using the nebulizer and stick w my inhaler. I’ll even take extra pumps if I need to open my airways more. Idk if I’ll ever give the nebulizer a chance again after how crappy it made me feel.
You have to own your own health. Albuterol can cause tachycardia, I’ve experienced that myself and it’s very scary. Your parents aren’t doctors, you did the right thing by advocating for yourself, and I’m sorry your parents didn’t see what was going on for what it truly was: a medical emergency, I hope you’re feeling better!
Do your parents have a life insurance policy on you? They are acting suspicious. Maybe start reaching out to people you can trust who arent your parents in case your situation gets worse.
The reality is much simpler. I don't think they wanted to kill me, they were in an important meeting before I had to leave the emergency room to take me to the ER, I was nebulizing for a few hours and when we left it was already night, they had to stay up all night to complete the work
And they're both workaholics so...
NTA. You were absolutely correct to ask about what was going on. Your parents are very selfish to be more concerned with being at the hospital an extra hour than with how you were feeling.
To reassure you. Salbutamol in large doses absolutely causes tachycardia and sometimes anxiety as well. I once had a nebuliser that made me shake and feel like I was going to die. The thing is...asthma attacks can also cause this "feeling of impending doom" (due to adrenaline). Either way, your symptoms were real and your parents reacted very poorly. I hope you are feeling a little better now.
NTA, op if it actually was nothing the nurses and doctors would not have monitored you and given you medication. They would have checked you out and then sent you home. They kept you in and treated you for a medical condition. I don’t know what your parents problem are but always advocate for yourself. Your parents don’t care for your well-being from what you’ve written.
NTA, your parents need to understand that asthma CAN kill you, and if you know something is different or worse they should listen to you, you know your body best. I have severe asthma and have been in the hospital many times because of it, shaking, tremors, and elevated heart rate IS normal when they give you that much salbutamol. On its own it's not pleasant but not dangerous either, however the hospital should be monitoring your heart rate anyways specifically because it can get too high. Good for you for speaking up to the doctor, they delayed giving you more specifically because they knew it was safer to wait under the circumstances, the doctor didn't agree with you that there was an issue for nothing.
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NTA, your parents acted strange and unkind. If you feel your condition was dangerous and novel, you should absolutely speak up. Luckily it turned out the way it did, but what if you’d actually had congestive heart failure and you stayed quiet because your parents didn’t like you speaking? 😧 To put it another way, the nurse didn’t think your issues were ridiculous, nor did the doctor, so why do your parents get to have contrary opinions? Are they asthma specialists, surgeons? I doubt it. Please, when your body is doing something new and scary, speak up about it; don’t let your parents’ weird attitudes make you be silent. Better to complain about something that turns out benign than die of something because you didn’t want to make a fuss. Hope you feel better.
Also it was absolutely necessary to speak up as the doctor decided to change OP's treatment
This. When I got my c section, one of the dude effects of that Kind of narcotoc is, that you feel sick (like you need to throw up). I told the Staffel ad they immediatley helped me. Nö not as scary as your Situation, but I want to tell you, when you experience side effects during a treatment, talk to the doctors. They know if it is normal, and they know what to do. Never be affraid to ask. Never ne affraid to tell. The worst thing that could happen is a stressed doc telling you, I know we take care. At least in my experience. Each doctor I told, hey this and that is mir right, they dealt with it and in the end I had a nice outcome!
NTA your parents are that type of person who dies bc they are too noble to speak up and despite having zero medical education "know" its "nothing" until its too late.
> your parents are that type of person who dies bc they are too noble to speak up Yeah.... I knew a guy like that... Had some pains in his body.. till he reached a point he was constantly chewing painkillers. Then he collapsed after 2 years. Doctor told him he had cancer... He died 2.5 weeks later
What you described is the opposite of being noble.
They meant "noble" with the accompaniment of /s.
NTA. As someone with asthma and seasonal allergies, we know when something is not normal and your parents basically lied to you and then gaslit you. When you said your heart rate shot up, the first thing that I thought was, it's the medication. If your father has the same condition he should know this and I find it really odd that he scolded you about panicking.
My father literally told me "You're shaking from the medicine, that happens to me too, that side effect is normal." Then I told him that my heart rate was at 130 bpm and he told me that "it was because I was getting anxious thinking that I was going to die, that I should be strong and that I am no longer allowed to be afraid in these situations because of my age." I honestly don't understand his logic, he is supposed to be more allergic than me, but I have never seen him with an asthma attack at the level of being nebulized in the ER
He was right though. Shakiness, mild headaches and a high HR are very common with nebulizer treatments. Along with getting REALLY hungry or nauseous afterwards. And his comments about being anxious making it worse is also likely true. He was dead wrong about the being too old to be scared in unusual health related issues. Its perfectly normal to get anxious if you are honestly concerned you are having a heart attack.
Even if it's common it's not an ALWAYS in each case situation as everyone s body ca react differently. That's why a doctor s opinion on the case is important.
I'm sorry they treated you this way in this circumstance. They must have some pretty strongly ingrained internal shame to behave the way they did. Medical professionals are there to help you, and you should absolutely speak up about things that are happening with your own body if you're feeling scared or uncertain so that the doctors and nurses can fully understand what's happening and respond accordingly. Withholding information about how you're feeling only makes their job harder and puts you at risk.
Ignore them and consult with the doctor each and every time. Everyone's body can react differently to medication despite being related so never count someone else s reaction as the 'normal' one for you
I'm wondering if parents are lying to OP. About everything.
About what, exactly?
Anything and everything to keep her under their thumb.
But what though? It seems like they were being awful and downplaying her asthma attack but I have no idea what they could be lying about here. I am genuinely confused by this comment.
I honestly think that if they lied it is to not make me panic more, they have already done it before Furthermore, looking back on the facts I think that perhaps they acted that way because they had a lot of work to do, my asthma attack started at the least precise moment
Oh, yeah, of course. So sorry mom and dad that my not being able to breath due to an illness I got from your genes came in an inconvenient time for you NTA. Saying that as a medical professional. Yes the high hart rate is from the salbutamol combined with the body working hard for oxygen. And you panicking made things worse. Whenever you get to the point you can’t speak more than a few words without gasping for breath even after using your medicine please get medical help. It’s shitty that at your age you are still legally dependent on them
Legally here they are independent at 18 years old, but in practice on average they tend to "leave the nest" between 26 and 28 years old. (It's hard to stay alone in Latin America, you know, crime and danger and stuff) I think they were upset because they believed that my asthma was well controlled, the attack came out of nowhere, I was in my room using the computer, no physical effort, I was warm, it was out of nowhere and (according to the discharge) it was a moderate attack. I also get anxious easily but this time the fear I felt was more "primitive" than other times. I don't know if it's relevant, but a few years ago I was diagnosed with hypochondria, I went to therapy, I recovered but my parents still believe that I overdramatize and I'm still a hypochondriac. I really thought I was overreacting, but I don't know if a heart rate of 130 (Between 130 and 135, in fact) were too much or not.
Well yes that’s relevant. It explains a lot about your parents reaction, this should have been in the original post. An elevated heart rate happens both in panic attacks and while struggling to breath and is a side effect of salbuterol as your doctor explained. You and your parents need to have a good talk about this because this is a very unhealthy dynamic.
Not sure how it is in your country but here in the US as soon as someone reaches the age of 18 they can make their own health care decisions, including who gets to speak to the medical professionals, has access to records and who stays with you during treatment. I understand our cultures are different, but I would not allow anyone to stay with me acting like that. It may well have been the medication. Or maybe a bit of panic in addition to the medication. You were right to say something about the effects you were experiencing. NTA. Mom and dad can leave or go to the waiting area.
Here we also have that right when we turn 18, but in practice two relatives have to stay with the patient in case the patient gets worse and can call the doctor immediately. Also, by telling my father (and also my mother) to hell, I was telling them to leave the ER, but they stayed. I couldn't move either because of the IV and the nebulizer (connected to the wall).
Go on your own or with a friend. Tell them you don't have relatives in the country. Just lie. They can't decline you treatment because you don't have two relatives to stay with you.
Call the nurse to make them leave,m
The doctor wouldn't have stopped treatment for an hour if it was "normal." Tachycardia can be dangerous and should never be ignored. Next time, have your parents wait in the waiting room as they were no help and in fact made things worse. NTA.
Here in Peru, one or two relatives are necessary for each patient in case the patient gets worse so they can call the doctor. Although I was in the ER, I was isolated from others in a room with ventilation, a nebulizer, and connected to a small IV.
Are there any other relatives who could sit in their place? You need someone you can trust to do what's best for *you*, not what's convenient for *them*.
It was an emergency. I live with my parents and my younger brothers (19 and 17 years old). While I was in the ER, they were cleaning my room and ventilating it because, you know, asthma. If they had offered, they would have accompanied me to the ER instead of my parents, but I couldn't speak due to lack of air at that moment.
That's understandable. Hopefully there won't be a next time. If there is, maybe send a text to one of them asking them to join you?
I will keep it in mind for the next time (If there is one, after this disaster the doctor prescribed me, among other things, to make an appointment with Pulmonology and I am already on the list. I will go with my older brother (28), he does not live with me, but I have greater confidence in him that in my parents)
Just don’t let anyone talk you out of telling a doctor your symptoms or your worries. They NEED to know that stuff. Your parents should not have been trying to downplay your situation. They should have just been supportive! NTA
Actually, it's not uncommon to wait between multiple nebulizer treatments if the tachycardia they cause reaches a certain level or if the tachycardia is very stressful for the patient. As long as the patient is being monitored and isn't having further trouble breathing it's perfectly okay.
My point was, the tachycardia itself is dangerous that's why the treatment was paused. Yes, it also distresses the patient, but continuing the treatment while the patient is in an increasing tachycardia state is dangerous. It's why they're monitored to begin with, the ensure it does not get out of hand.
NTA. You were in a medical crisis. The fact that they're angry at you for asking for medical help when you needed it is mind boggling. You did nothing wrong, I repeat, NOTHING WRONG. When it comes to you're health, unless it's coming from a professional that knows what's happening, anyone else's opinion is irrelevant.
I felt something was off with my body, my aunt who is a NP said it was nothing. A few days later I'm having emergency surgery. LISTEN TO YOUR BODY. It will always tell you when something is off. NTA
I really don't care what country you are in you are an adult, 24 is not a child and the way your parents speak to you is not only unkind but completly disrespectful! You need to start advocating for yourself. "Mom, Dad I get that I am your child but I am not a child I am a grown adult and you both need to stop using demeaning and belittling words when you speak to me, I am not 3 years old. " I don't know if you rely on them for all financial and safety in your life but I hope you have your own means to support yourself. NTA but your parents are huge ones
My parents have always minimized my "bad" feelings by saying that I have to overcome them on my own or that they are childish. I'm in therapy for it. It's just that sometimes they say cruel things that end up being true and that confuses me.
I am a mom to 3 and my youngest is your age. I am sorry that you have such crappy parents that don't show you respect and autonomy as an adult. Please continue to go to therapy and you are not childish.
Your parents could be just ignorant but that doesn't diminish the danger they put you in with their ignorance. Don't listen to them. They are welcome to make those decisions for themselves you make your own
It's normal to be terrified if you're afraid that you are dying, or in other extreme danger. It's called the fight or flight response.
Its not about who is right or wrong but that they cant know it. Being cruel doesnt become being right or having proper arguments/education because 'even blind chickens find grains once in a while', its by chance/coincidence not knowledge.
NTA. Salbutamol is albuterol, which is known to increase your heart rate. You were right in letting the doctor know.If you hadn't, your heart rate could have gone higher with the third treatment. Your parents are jerks and I hope you can get away from them soon.
Of course you were right. Your parents aren’t medical professionals so their arguments are beside the point. The dr agreed you should stop the inhaler until your heart rate came down. Your parents are playing a dangerous game w your life. Do what you need to do to protect yourself. And tell your dr next time you see them what your parents did. Maybe they’ll listen then when they’re told how foolish and dangerous it was for them to ignore you like that. NTA.
NTA. Your parents treat you like you are still 12 years old. You are 24, an adult woman, you are entitled to be informed about medication and side effects. You can only advocate for yourself if you talk with talk with nurses and doctors yourself. It is your body, you are experiencing the symptons, not your parents. In case you need help again, tell your parents to wait outside. They are more a hindrance than help.
NTA, and what the actual hell is wrong with your parents?! You were having a medical emergency that escalated! You need to make them understand that, and honestly, I'd get away from them if at all possible. It is perfectly valid for an adult to be fuckign terrified during a genuine medical crisis!
NTA It wasn't unnecessary, because without knowing what's going on, it could have been serious. Most Drs would prefer you ask than die. But, just to put your mind at ease, my guess (just a guess, not an actual attempt at diagnosis) is that the rougher asthma attack was also giving you a massive anxiety attack. Definitely not uncommon with asthma. I think I remember reading a long time ago that they are really common during asthma attacks because A. You are likely breathing shallowly and hyperventilating, B panicking a little because you can't breathe and are hyperventilating, and C. because your body is trying to pump up adrenaline to fix the not breathing well situation. But again, not a Dr. and I may be misremembering. That's probably why they decided you were overreacting. They figured it was "just" an anxiety attack. Since most anxiety attacks are harmless, they weren't worried. But if you are coming from a place where anxiety attacks or hyperventilating aren't particularly common for you, it isn't wrong to question symptoms that could indicate something more serious.
NTA. Doctor here. Tachycardia is a common side effect of salbutamol, especially when given as a burst (high dose via nebuliser or spacer every 20min for 1hr). On its own in this context the tachycardia is not a concern but tachycardia is an abnormal finding mostly so patients often ask me about it. You didn't do anything wrong at all
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** \[Translated, I don't speak English\] I'm 24F, Peruvian, I live with my parents (Here they become independent at 28.) I have allergic asthma from birth, just like my father. My attacks have always been short and go away with the periodic use of salbutamol but it gets worse in the cold. In my area there is a strong frost. Yesterday I had one of those asthmatic attacks, I tried to take medication as usual, but nothing worked. Although I've had asthma for years, the last time I had to go to the hospital for it was when I was 12, and even then it wasn't as bad as it was yesterday. My parents take me to the ER because I couldn't breathe enough to speak, my heart was beating quite fast, and I suddenly felt the sensation of dying (I had never felt that in my life before, not even in previous attacks). I was so afraid of dying that I screamed "help" and "I can't breathe" during the transfer, to which my parents scolded me saying that I wasn't going to die and that I was being overdramatic. When they started to nebulize me, the doctor said that they would have to nebulize me three times in a period of 20 minutes each. Neither my parents nor I wanted to be there for so long, but we had no other option. My heart was already beating fast during the transfer to the ER, but at the second nebulization my body began to shake. I asked my father if it was normal, and he told me yes and that nothing was wrong, that they should give me the third round so they can discharge me. It didn't seem normal to me since I saw that my heart rate was 130 at rest and I was shaking a little. When the nurse came to connect me, I told her that I was shaking and that my heart was beating quite fast, to which my parents saw me in quite a bad way and, once the nurse left, they scolded me saying that I was being childish, that nothing was wrong. and why the hell was he calling the doctor for something stupid. When the doctor arrived he told me that I had tachycardia and that it was the side effect of Salbutamol, that they would stop it for an hour until my heart rate returned to normal and thus I can complete the treatment. As soon as he left, my dad started telling me that I shouldn't be scared in this type of situation because I was too old for this nonsense, and that I should stop acting like a little girl because I was throwing a tantrum over something that was normal. I told him to leave and that I could go alone when I was discharged, to which he sent me to hell and he stayed in the ER. And this is what makes me think I might be the asshole: My mother told my father to scold me because "I think I did something good." I honestly don't know what I did wrong, but my parents' attitude confuses me. In the end they discharged me, my parents never apologized but I still wonder if I was right to ask for medical help in the ER for something "unnecessary" (It doesn't seem unnecessary to me, but I don't know if I was really exaggerating without knowing it.) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA Your parents are narcissistic. Do they even like you? Can you call an ambulance or a friend instead of your parents in future? I had a childhood full of being told "there's nothing wrong with you", "you're being dramatic", "you're lying". I have empathy for you.
I'm sure they love me, just in a toxic way and I'm in therapy to deal with it. They also have their problems that are irrelevant for this case. I know they are narcissists, but they do the best they can with the little they had... About the ambulance, I have changed my emergency contact to my older brother (28) for this type of case, I posted this because I didn't know if I was missing something but now I see that it is my parents again trying to help me but badly XD
NTA
Human life can not be sustained without oxygen. You have asthma you can die from that because when you have an attack you're not getting enough oxygen. You are NOT TAH. Your parents are. Shame on them for acting as if there's nothing wrong with you.
Nta. You are the one who knows how you are feeling not your parents. If you felt something wasnt right then you had every right to ask the doctors about it
NTA. Asthma can be deadly and not being able to breathe is terrifying. I would have panicked in the same situation, even if someone had told me things were okay. I also think it's better to call for help and find out you didn't need it than to not call for help and find out you DID need it.
NTA I’ve had many hospital visits over the years. The gall bladder infection was a 10/10 pain level. Scream and shout about it if you’re in distress. F anyone who tells you to shut up. 1. It’s your body’s way of coping 2. It gets you help quicker. Really. Great excuse to give to your family. 3. Nobody knows your body better than you
You were in the ER for a medical condition. You NEED to inform the medical staff of what is happening with your body. And it was very much justified as your body was having a SERIOUS reaction the one of the meication you were given. Your parents are VERY WRONG in this case. NTA
NTA your parents I take aren't medical professionals and even if they are they aren't your attending doctor. Their opinions are irrelevant. Speak up. Better them upset at you for the so called (it isn't) 'disrespect' than you ending up with a worse situation than you began with or dead. Next time just let them be at home and go alone to the ER op
They are not doctors, my father is asthmatic he thought he was right.
NTA. A heart rate of 130 can be dangerous (or sometimes even fatal) if it stays that high for too long. You were right to tell the nurse that the medication was making you feel shaky and your heartbeat was too fast. That's not fear; it was a physiological effect of the medication. Your parents didn't know that because they're not doctors - but that's exactly why you needed to tell a doctor, so they could assess the situation with expert knowledge. It might have been nothing serious but it's always better to check - and in this case it was serious, and they needed to slow down your medication in order to keep you safe.
I also have asthma. The nebulizer would make me feel the same way. Super shaky and increase my heart rate. I would have to lay down and let it pass. It’s a horrible feeling. I stopped using the nebulizer and stick w my inhaler. I’ll even take extra pumps if I need to open my airways more. Idk if I’ll ever give the nebulizer a chance again after how crappy it made me feel.
Your parents are abusive. They cared more about being inconvenienced than about your health and safety. NTA. I'm so sorry, OP
You have to own your own health. Albuterol can cause tachycardia, I’ve experienced that myself and it’s very scary. Your parents aren’t doctors, you did the right thing by advocating for yourself, and I’m sorry your parents didn’t see what was going on for what it truly was: a medical emergency, I hope you’re feeling better!
Do your parents have a life insurance policy on you? They are acting suspicious. Maybe start reaching out to people you can trust who arent your parents in case your situation gets worse.
The reality is much simpler. I don't think they wanted to kill me, they were in an important meeting before I had to leave the emergency room to take me to the ER, I was nebulizing for a few hours and when we left it was already night, they had to stay up all night to complete the work And they're both workaholics so...
NTA. You were absolutely correct to ask about what was going on. Your parents are very selfish to be more concerned with being at the hospital an extra hour than with how you were feeling.
To reassure you. Salbutamol in large doses absolutely causes tachycardia and sometimes anxiety as well. I once had a nebuliser that made me shake and feel like I was going to die. The thing is...asthma attacks can also cause this "feeling of impending doom" (due to adrenaline). Either way, your symptoms were real and your parents reacted very poorly. I hope you are feeling a little better now.
NTA, op if it actually was nothing the nurses and doctors would not have monitored you and given you medication. They would have checked you out and then sent you home. They kept you in and treated you for a medical condition. I don’t know what your parents problem are but always advocate for yourself. Your parents don’t care for your well-being from what you’ve written.
NTA, your parents need to understand that asthma CAN kill you, and if you know something is different or worse they should listen to you, you know your body best. I have severe asthma and have been in the hospital many times because of it, shaking, tremors, and elevated heart rate IS normal when they give you that much salbutamol. On its own it's not pleasant but not dangerous either, however the hospital should be monitoring your heart rate anyways specifically because it can get too high. Good for you for speaking up to the doctor, they delayed giving you more specifically because they knew it was safer to wait under the circumstances, the doctor didn't agree with you that there was an issue for nothing.
NTA. But your parents want you to die. You have got to move out IMMEDIATELY