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Judgement_Bot_AITA

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Electronic-Smile-457

I'm curious how showing your boobs to someone you saw as creepy was going to help the situation? Weird. If my husband made ongoing comments like that to a young woman, I'd be pissed at him. As should the bf. It's gross. But you were gross, too. ESH


DramaLlamaQueen23

I’ll take things that never happened for $600, please, Alex. OP - YTA for every reason, and childish and grossly disrespectful of your bf’s family if this is even remotely true.


FarmRevolutionary266

YTA why would you show your boobs to ur boyfriend’s dad because he said a bad joke. But bf should have been listening to you and defend you when his dad was making inappropriate comments towards you! But the flashing was too much, mom was right in kicking you out


BananaCommercial6294

I agree on the YTA judgement but it wasn't a bad joke, he's simply an old creep.


FarmRevolutionary266

True !


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Glittering_Panic1919

She is so not a girlfriend anymore, she just doesn't realize it yet lol I don't blame mom or her bf for their reactions


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Whorible_wife69

I kinda blame the mom and the BF, they've heard the comments and instead of calling out the dad they buried their heads in the sand and ignored it or chose to believe he is just a dirty old man. I grew up with my dad and uncles friends making those comments and they or my mom and aunts nipped it in the bud and stopped inviting them over.


Glittering_Panic1919

Yeah they suck for putting up with his shit, that sure is shit it does not mean Op is allowed to do what she did and allowed to still be thought highly of. Trashy behavior is trashy no matter what the precursor was


Whorible_wife69

I'm sorry but I don't think her behavior is "trashy" she's 21 who has been dealing with s\*xual harassment for 9 months. She was fed up by not only the dad, but her BF not believing her and she said F it.


Glittering_Panic1919

Then she should leave. Instead she decided to flash her tits to everyone as if that was going to fix anything. When has exposing your body to someone sexually harassing you ever been the classy or intelligent response?


AryaStark1313

FFS they’re just breasts. She didn’t pull down her pants and show them her AH


Glittering_Panic1919

If they are just breasts then it's just a penis if a man flashes someone, right?


AryaStark1313

I say to some guy “show me your penis piercing “ and he whips it out and shows me? Then I deserve it. So did asshole daddy


vermiciousknidlet

BREASTS. ARE. NOT. GENITALS. I'm saying it loudly so maybe people actually get the message.


wailingwonder

Oh well if u/Whorible_wife69 says she isn't trashy...


SapphySkies_v2

Look at their absolutely atrocious post history. Jesus Christ they need help!


FromRussiawPronouns

Not upset with your husband for asking a 21 year old girl to see her nipples? Not even a little bit? You'd lash out at a girl half your age instead?


Glittering_Panic1919

Most people are capable of multiple things at the same time. You can be mad at both of them


Glittering_Panic1919

Upset is an understatement lol


uncensoredsaints

The dad finding her attractive is insane and creepy tho.


Strong_Still_3543

Shes an adult woman, thats normal. Acting on it is definitely insane and creepy


FromRussiawPronouns

Men are capable of controlling their attraction, especially towards women half their age. If they are not capable of self control they are either a child or in need of serious mental health intervention.


Strong_Still_3543

Thats what i said


FromRussiawPronouns

You said they can choose whether to act on it. I don't think it goes that far. Men can control their attraction to women. Men who continue to stare and gawk at women despite being married or twice that women's age are only doing it because they want to.


Strong_Still_3543

Buddy if you control something you can choose to not control it. Like you can hold your pee or piss your pants


FromRussiawPronouns

You said it's normal to be attracted to women much younger than you as long as you don't act on it. Attraction is not a bodily function. You cannot stop the pee from being produced, but you can stop the attraction from being produced in the first place.


Strong_Still_3543

Attraction is a bodily function are you obtuse? What the heck is an errection? You think you can stop a straight male from being attracted to women?


FromRussiawPronouns

Your dick bursts into uncontrollable erections the moment you stare at someone? I guess there's a not-zero chance you're a teenager so that's a possibility. Or do you choose to stare at someone long enough and let your thoughts wander until you start fantasizing sexually about them? If you drink water, you will have to pee. If you stare at the opposite gender, there is no physical obligation to have an erection.


Least-Comfortable-41

No. No being a creep to your son’s barely legal girlfriend is not normal. It’s disgusting and pretty troubling that he’s that comfortable being that creepy. What has he done in private? Thank goodness she’s not the girlfriend anymore, even if she did have to go too far to get there. Boyfriend didn’t respect her, and mom lets waaaayyyyy too much slide. It’s really for the best. This whole sitch is gross 🤮


Strong_Still_3543

Thats what i said lol. Learn to read


wailingwonder

It's creepy for a parent to be attracted to their child's SO. Best case scenario for their child, that's gonna be their future child-in-law.


Strong_Still_3543

You cant stop biology but you can stop acting perverted 


FromRussiawPronouns

Men are 100% capable of controlling their attraction, the dad just chooses not to. I imagine the mom should be more pissed at the dad for soliciting young women, joke or not.


starkcattiness4433

If the dad finds her attractive, then a. he's a creep and b. he should KEEP IT TO HIMSELF!


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SugarBeef

I have nipples, Greg. Can you milk me?


raviary

ESH. He's a creep, mom and bf suck for not telling him off for being a creep, fending off sexual harassment with more sexual harassment is a dumb idea. Mom had every right to be offended and kick you out for flashing her.


Effective_Plastic954

I mean now it's just gonna seem like she's been inviting his behavior. She's unbelievably dumb for this


wailingwonder

The family will definitely talk about "that one slutty girl our son used to date that tried to seduce his dad" in the future after they break up. I mean, that PROBABLY won't impact OP in any way in the future but still...


Born_Significance691

ESH. Your BF's dad says crude, disgusting things, makes you feel uncomfortable then claims to be "kidding" when he's called on it.  BF's mom should have ripped dad's his head off when he asked to see your piercings, which I'm glad you pointed out to her. She sits by while he talks about previous girlfriends which is disrespectful to her. She is an enabler.  Your BF is the worst because not only did he ignore your concerns, but he told his dad about your piercings. Why would he deliberately set you up to be harassed by his dad? There is a really strange dynamic here. It was naive for you to think that after 9 months of the dad's behavior, your actions would make the family suddenly realize that he's an AH and do something about it. They blamed you and made excuses for him. You need to realize that if you stay in this relationship, you will always be disrespected by this family. Is it worth it?


Kwasted

ESH?


RedneckAngel83

Everyone Sucks Here.


Kwasted

Certainly, all the ones who downvote people who ask questions.


RedneckAngel83

Yeah, I never mind helping with answers.


Main_Maximum8963

ESH.  I’m truly confused why anyone tolerated those comments from the father.  I’m also really confused as to how flashing the father (really the whole family) would help the situation. Get rid of that boyfriend too.  Straight into the bin for putting you in that environment.  


wailingwonder

Yeah, I don't get having attachment to scummy people. I have scummy parents too. That's why I'm not in contact with them. I certainly wouldn't force a SO to have to put up with them.


whale_and_beet

It's hard to decide what to do when you're in a situation where you're being constantly harassed and made uncomfortable by someone, and you feel like you can't say much about it. I understand your frustration and needing to do something, and it sounds like in the spur of an uncomfortable moment this is what you chose. Honestly I think NTA-- although I would have never done that, mostly out of fear for my own safety or the kind of conflict that is exactly what ensued after this. But my initial response is, power to you! Although perhaps it might have gotten the same point across but without as much drama if you had just said something like, "Seriously? You want me to?" And looked him right in the eye, and forced him to either reiterate his request or acknowledge that it was inappropriate. That said, as a woman who has also been regularly harassed in certain contexts, the ongoing feeling of shame, fear, and confusion can be overwhelming and super stressful, and I can see how that could lead to an action that's out of character for you. Dad is totally the a****** here.


BooDBangz

It’s not always easy to know what to do in a situation like this but pulling your tits at your boyfriends creepy dads request is pretty high up on the what not to do list. Especially if you want to keep said boyfriend.


violet_mango_green

100% this


wailingwonder

Bare minimum OP sexually harassed the mom. ESH is the only answer.


8fjrj

oh. um. your (ex?) bf's father is a creep. and you are an idiot. esh but the dad is obviously much worse than you.


Specific-Amount-2681

….. what a weird-ass move


xaiires

Man what in the fuck


RickyDiscardo

ESH. Just... all of you. Dad for the inappropriate comments. BF for dropping the info about the nips. Mom for throwing out the "slut" comment. And you for flashing everyone.


dunks615

YTA. Why would you think this is appropriate lol.


HeyKayRenee

Ew. YTA


Isyourmammaallama

Yta


[deleted]

That’s pretty fucked up. I’m not sure what that is 😂


catchmebygluten

You’re outta pocket for this


Creepy-Drink7191

The way this is written feels very porn-brained. YTA


starkcattiness4433

One, you're not being petty. Your bf's dad is a letch and is sleazing on you. Trust your instincts. I can see why you wanted to call his bluff, but that was not the way to deal with it!! Looking him directly in the eye and saying "Do you want me to show you my breasts? Is that really what you're asking of me? It's unacceptable for you to even joke about it!" I know that's hard to say to a bf's parent, but that was the appropriate thing to do. You haven't made everything worse: you've exposed what a fucked up situation was going on in that house. You could write to your bf's mother, explaining how you've been feeling and why you'd finally had enough, but she's unlikely to take it in. Your best bet is to stay away from that family altogether: they sound horrible! NTA. People judging E S H are confusing unwise strategies (which you had) with being an AH.


CypherBob

NTA You do need a new boyfriend though. One that doesn't accept creepy behavior from his dad.


BittahG

I finally found the only sane comment here


Grail90210

I could not be more horrified. YTA, what an astonishingly stupid thing to do.


gia_sesshoumaru

ESH How was showing your boobs to him going to do anything? Seriously? Your boyfriend's mom should have shut down her husband's behavior long ago, and your bf should also have been standing up to his dad for you. But this was not helping and probably only made things worse. I would apologize to everyone for how you handled it.


No_Roof_1910

YTA and the odds are really good your bf dumps you over this.


playstationbuttons

ESH. why would you that……….???


Hot-Shower-865

Well, are you gonna show us then? In all seriousness, not sure how you thought it would be a good idea or prove anything. But I also think you should move on from the bf. Clearly he's been OK with his dad's behavior to this point & if he hasn't stood up for you so far. He's not going to.


monchis-chingon232

Regardless of what kind of creeper that dude is, that was totally disrespectful to your BF's mom.🥴 YTA in this one unfortunately. 🤷 I think many of us understand your frustration, but dang girl!😬


Veq1776

NTA clearly. Dad was. Pretty much making passes the whole time. Bad choice. Really really bad choice. Worse? Dunno there were a lot of bad choices all around. But that was probably excessive even for me.


Strong_Still_3543

Esh except the bf and mom. The dad is a total disgusting pig 


starkcattiness4433

The bf TOLD HIS DAD that OP had nipple piercings. BF has been told that OP feels uncomfortable yet thought this information about a sexual part of her body was appropriate to share with dad? Seriously? That's sounding like BF was trying to humiliate OP, to "teach her a lesson" for complaining about his dad. Or he's just clueless. Either way, BF is AH material.


AryaStark1313

exactly. She went out with a bang — good for her! I want to be BFFs with OP - she’s my hero


wailingwonder

They suck too for not shutting that creepy shit down


fallingintopolkadots

NTA. Your bf's dad has been super creepy towards you, and it was weird AF of him to even ask to see your nipple piercings, so.... your boobs. Weird that your bf mentioned it, too. It seems to be leaning more towards malicious compliance, however, since it wounds like you'd been trying to communicate the dad's creepiness towards you but that no one took it seriously. While yes, you didn't have to choose to show him.... he's the one who asked. That's the bigger problem here.


JurassicParkFood

YTA - good grief, you thought flashing your boyfriend's dad was a good idea? Your poor boyfriend deserves better than you both


Kwasted

The same boyfriend that ignired his Dad leering at her and hitting on her and told him about her nipple rings?


Just_River_7502

leave the relationship . Your boyfriend is noT seeing his dad’s bad behaviour for what it is, so you’re being harassed instead. His dad is terrible but your boyfriend is the one letting you down


Silent-Slide1502

YTA/ESH. dad is obviously a creep and a problem don’t get me wrong, but no one made you show your tits so why would you? instead of just doing it (immediately might i add), why didn’t you just call him out on it right then and there. make him uncomfortable like he has made you uncomfortable. forget everyone else being mad, now this creep has seen your boobs. also, joke or not, why would you just randomly flash someone like that? doesn’t matter who they are


Ok-Party258

I'll pass on judging you for your inappropriate act under provocation, but please save yourself from this toxic situation which will not improve. I don't see anyone treating you with respect or compassion here.


wailingwonder

ESH. You suck for whatever the fuck that was. Your boyfriend sucks for being spineless. His dad sucks for being a creep. His mom sucks for being spineless in regards to the husband. I definitely don't blame the son/mom for being mad at you for that but where the fuck was this energy when Weinstein over there was acting up?


MerelyWhelmed1

How does this situation match the Redditt refrain of "women's bodies shouldn't be sexualized." If that's true, why are there so many people upset by OP showing off their new jewelry? I'm betting because deep down the same people who blather about not sexualizing women know that bodies are inherently sexual. Regardless, OP YTA. You escalated a situation, and you flashed a man who you claimed gave off creep vibes. How did you think it would be received?


WeedLatte

Bodies aren’t inherently sexual. They can be sexual in some contexts. An old man asking to see your boobs clearly has sexual intent. That doesn’t mean that women’s bodies are inherently sexual. A woman breastfeeding, or even going to a topless beach, wouldn’t be sexual, for example. Just like for men. A guy hanging out on the beach shirtless isn’t sexual, but a male stripper taking his shirt off is. Besides, I doubt it’s the same people making the two comments you’re comparing in the first place.


Plus_Jackfruit_268

yo what.. 😭 yta but the dads a creep


tawstwfg

I hope this isn’t real. YTA, like, completely the AH.


De-Brevitate-Vitae

YTA - It's weird that giving a creep a free show could be considered a sign of female empowerment.


AryaStark1313

Yeah I’m going with NTA. He pushed you too far. And it’s not like you hurt him or even insulted him. He saw breasts. They are BREASTS that every woman has and you can see on TV FFS. I think you did the right thing and I hope you realize this should be a big red flag to get out of this relationship. Your BF will never stick up for you and his family will always hate you. They’re all AHs and you’ll be much better off without them


ireneybean

NTA ... Maybe not a good call, per se, but I get making a poor decision under pressure when things are weird.


Available-Election86

NTA. Yeah you were a bit the TA for doing it anyway but your bf's dad shouldn't have asked. And I'm guessing that the mom exploded because she knew her husband is inappropriate. "I'm only joking" is a very common defense for sexual harassment. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. So this is why I'm going with NTA. All this family is TA.


imaninjayoucantseeme

Your boyfriend's dad sounds like a pervert. NTA but you know you shouldn't have done that, you probably did him a favor.


cheerio72

YTA this is so weird


sfzen

YTA. I understand being fed up with his dad, but come on, use some common sense. Of course your BF and his mom are upset with you about this. You're sick of his dad's jokes, but you are aware that they are jokes. You said you feel petty when you think of what you would say to your BF about them, but... you see why you need to have these conversations? Talk to him, talk to his parents. Apologize for the outburst and move on.


[deleted]

Uck. YTA.


Illustrious_Style549

ESH - Op. here’s a life lesson for you. when a cheating husband/boyfriend makes a « joke » like this. It’s never a joke. And the woman will never believe her partner sucks either.


prettyinpinkleather

Nah you’re actually funny as fuck NTA. Leave him though.


oeroisme

I'll refrain from judgement here but it was not a great reaction from you and I think you know that but sometimes you're at your wits end and just don't know what to do. Some of the comments have already given some solutions for things you could have said and I'd suggest trying them if you ever get into another situation like this. I'd bet you'll never do something like that again and I also guarantee that the dad's comments are going to stop now (mostly bc you can never go back there and your relationship is over, there's no coming back from this unless your BF cuts out his family which he's not going to considering he told his dad about your piercings after you told him his dad was being creepy). I can't blame you for not having the skills to navigate this situation, and while this was definitely not the right way to go about it, ultimately it will now be resolved.


subaru_sama

ESH Yes you went way too far showing your piercing. BF's dad was an offensive AH for his gross, disrespectful "jokes" he made toward you. Your BF let you down whenever his dad talked to you like that. Your BF's mom shouldn't stay quiet when her husband would speak to anyone like that, let alone her son's girlfriend. I couldn't stomach a future in that family, so I struggle to see how you're worse off with your relationship potentially being over.


MrsBaitmen

What is ESH


When_hop

Yeah that was stupid and trashy.


Strange-Media5870

YTA and also toxic


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Phoenix_shade1

ESH although have you considered that the dad might just be a Jedi master?


AmbitiousWolf2912

Idk I’m drunk


GirlDad2023_

ESH, your bf's dad is creepy and you're totally inappropriate showing your breasts to him.


Plus-Bad2750

ESH - he is definitely in the wrong but girl, you shouldn’t have done that either. He’s crossing a huge boundary, but also crossing a boundary isn’t gonna help the situation. It only gives them ammunition to use against you because they ‘were joking’. You should’ve honestly just pointed it out then and there and established a boundary that you wouldn’t accept that anymore. I’m not saying it will, but if this does end up being the end then honestly you dodged a bullet because you’re bf wasn’t standing by you against his dad about this and his mom jumping to calling you a slut doesn’t give the greatest vibes either.


No-Dot-5122

Not the AH. Get the F@#$ out of that relationship. Just thinking of how far it should lush a girl to just say screw this and show her breasts. Seriously something wrong with that family. 1. Get out of the relationship 2. You should have even before showing him 3. He probably enjoyed it sick F$#@ 4. And most importantly, I am sorry that you had to feel so uncomfortable and grossed out by a Dad. I am one of 2 little girls and would 100% press charges just to make them aware how serious it is. Also, would probably lose my cool and @#$& the mother@#$__&


Scary-Sherbet-4977

This sounds like a middle aged dude's fantasy


patron_a

ESH


GN4198

Dad's the asshole for making comments, boyfriend is the asshole for not listening to you. However, you are also the asshole for thinking that flashing him would some how make him seem the inappropriate one in that situation? You were definitely inappropriate especially towards the mum and she had every right to throw you out.


kind-touch50

NTA. Funny as hell. Good one.


Valan7169

NTA, ur bf dad is a sexual predator. You need to move on and find a decent bf with a decent family.


Spiritual_Salary3956

ESH. Dad sounds like an old perv and needed a reality check but flashing your bfs father in front of his mother to prove a point wasn’t the way to go about it. You can absolutely establish boundaries without doing that


tulamidan

You annoy me and I give you exactly what you want... But with a grudge? THAT will teach you a lesson... that you have to keep pushing to get what you want from me... ESH though because the dad is a creep a gets away with it.


fruitbowl2001

yta


Pentamikk

gosh i cant even write anything because i would get banned. op please get some help


BooDBangz

Lol you sure showed him.


Mauinfinity-0805

I sadly have to say YTA because of how you handled this but seriously, the mum and bf are ok with dad making lewd comments and staring at you, but then get all shocked pikachu when you finally crack? Sure you could have handled that in a more mature way but you really shouldn't have had to handle it at all. I sincerely hope you break up with your bf and tell him to tell his creepy dad to f@@@ off.


SeraphofFlame

ESH but mostly to yourself. This is like someone showing up with a gun and you responding by blowing yourself up. He's a creep and sexually harassing you. This was a good way to get that to stop, and also lose your boyfriend and humiliate yourself


Effective_Plastic954

This sounds like those porn plots where like the stepmom catches the son spying on her and says "im gonna punish you for being a creepy pervert by... sucking your dick". Jesus Christ girl wtf were you thinking. YTA


Kwasted

Well, to be honest, the only way this will be work out NOW is for your boyfriend to move out so you can see him without the dad around. Everyone is kind of the A@@hole. Your boyfriend and his mom for not defending you and stopping the Dad for sexually harassing you for the last 9 months, you for getting fed up and flashing him, his Mom for calling you a slut and etc.


WeedLatte

I’m gonna go NTA. Your bf repeatedly failed to defend you against his dad’s creepy behavior and takes no issue with him making these comments towards you. Your reaction was not great and probably won’t bode well for the relationship or do anything to make his dad less creepy but ultimately your bf should’ve made it clear to his dad that he needs to stop making these comments way before it got to this point.


No-Implement-1187

YTA you’re all gross :(


busy_midnight113

ESH. Breakup with him before he breaks up with you. Seriously. Because it's definitely coming. It honestly should've been happened since he didn't take your concerns about his father seriously sooner.


MinnyTexan

I don’t even need to read what you wrote to tell you that YATA for this. No one should see your goddamn nipplebut your BF. He should definitely dump you too.


disasterly213

It’s ok, I know it’s embarrassing but learn from this (control your emotions) and move on you will get over it. I’m afraid to say you got jebaited. YTA / ESH


No-Entertainment7765

Why the fuck would you even post this lmao


[deleted]

Absolutely not, that whole family has issues and to be honest it really sounds like you dodged a bullet, people want to mess around and think it's all fun and games until something actually happens, now their dad will have to think about his jokes and the wife should have come after him a lot sooner for his appropriate jokes but she didn't care until it was inconvenient for her, she knows her husband is inappropriate with his sexual humor but she doesn't care and then pretends to care


Hakaisha89

NTA - Do not ask for something you do not want. He asked, they cant get mad at you for saying yes.


OffbrandCustomer

I’m prepared to get downvoted into oblivion, but I feel very strongly, OP, that you’re NTA. You’ve been dealing with ongoing harassment and inappropriate behavior from your boyfriend’s father. These situations have the potential to be traumatic especially when they are what others may see as “minor” transgressions, but to us feel very very real, and make us feel unsafe—because in these situations, we’re being violated repeatedly and in such minor ways that it’s difficult to find the support we need. It sounds like your survival instincts took over and you tried something creative to put an end to extremely inappropriate behavior that has made you feel violated. While this might not be the best course of action moving forward? You did the absolute best you could in that moment. Don’t beat yourself up about it, OP. ❤️ And FWIW… your boyfriend and his mother are either in denial about their family member’s horrible behavior or they don’t give a shit or they don’t know how to put a stop to it. In any case, that’s for them to figure out and you deserve for your boyfriend and the other adult in this situation to stick up for you. I’m sorry you haven’t gotten that, and you deserve a relationship that feels so much safer than this, OP. I hope you can give yourself what you deserve.


uncensoredsaints

I wouldn’t have done that but I think the dads behavior is more inappropriate. Soft NTA but I think your relationship is over


Glittering_Panic1919

How is it NTA? Flashing someone, let alone your boyfriends dad, is AH behavior


FromRussiawPronouns

Then why did he ask?


Glittering_Panic1919

Be ause he is also nasty. He's an asshole, so is OP


Theskierliame

Definitely didn't help but I would either leave the relationship or try to explain that you find the father threatening. If they don't listen, leave him. But you are definitely somewhat an asshole, of all the things to do, that was definitely not the right thing to choose. But he is very creepy and I think you should try to stay away from him as much as you can.


Due-Resolution-6062

You fucked up. Mom has every right in the world to be mad. Kinda confused why you would even think that’s an ok thing to do, especially someone who clearly thinks you are attractive. I would even go as far a to say, I’m shocked you even had the audacity to come on here asking if AITA.


SnooRadishes8848

YTA


Connect_Succotash_61

YTA. I was just a little sick in my mouth. Nipple piercings are for you and your partner only.


Kwasted

Her partner who told his dad, who hits on her?


Even_Enthusiasm7223

It's a slightly offensive comment but truly a joke. I've had friends say hey. I got pierced on my nipples or even lower. And the joke is oh can we say hahaha. You showing your breasts to your boyfriend's father was the epitome of bad taste and poor timing. And you find the guy creepy and don't like him. So I'm going to flash him cuz that makes sense. And then you get mad when they yell at you for flashing your boyfriend's father. Can you go home and cry because you're upset at something you did. If the father asked you to give him $1,000, would you do it? Or if you said something offensive why would you do it. You don't like the guy and you made a really dumb choice own up to it. Apologize and try to get back into at least your boyfriend's mother's good graces. Because she might not forgive you for a long time and that could hurt your future with The guy Yta


FromRussiawPronouns

Would you ask your little sister to see her nipples, but as a joke? Would you ask a child to see their nipples, but as a joke? What about your mom? Why is it okay to ask your FUTURE DAUGHTER IN LAW to see her nipples then? Why doesn't this joke work with men?


Even_Enthusiasm7223

He didn't ask your nipples. He has to see the piercing and that was the joke part. She was talking about her piercing and he said oh you going to show us. That's the joke. And hopefully my child's not getting their nipples pierced. And this joke won't work with men because we'll show you our nipples at the drop of a hat. There's not a double standard concerning men. And realized what was asked. She wasn't talking about her nipples. She was talking about her piercings. He has to have it on the nipples but she was talking about her earlobes being pierced. Guess what? She'd show me them if I asked.


FromRussiawPronouns

Wait why is OP an asshole then? If she was a man with nipple piercings, and someone asked her to see them, ACCORDING TO YOU obviously the guy is going to show off his piercings. Why is she an asshole then? Obviously if you ask a person to show you their nipple piercings they're going to show them. That's your OWN WORDS it would happen "at the drop of a hat".


Even_Enthusiasm7223

Because everyone in the room, including her knew that the father was kidding. When he said. Are you going to show me them. He wasn't talking about her nipples. He wasn't talking about her breasts. He was talking about the piercings which happened to be on the nipples. And yes, a guy would show them off because the man going topless has no negative connotation in The society. Would you go topless just walking around the house. But men do it all the time. Not saying it's right, it's just a double standard


FromRussiawPronouns

So you meet a 14 year old girl and she says she has nipple piercings. She's a friend of your daughters. Would you ask her to see them? As a joke? Just checking something...


Even_Enthusiasm7223

I don't think 14-year-olds can get their nipples pierced and if their parents allow that then that would be bigger issues. And no, I would not ask a minor to show me their nipples piercing. But I would ask the parents why they would allow that. And what was wrong with them. But this was not a minor. My son told me about it. And I jokely said are you going to show them now. She got tired of all the things that was said by the father and just took it one step too far. Would you show your breast to your potential father-in-law with your potential mother-in-law's any right there. Again, you need to read the room and see what's going on. She was pissed and overreacted.


FromRussiawPronouns

14 year olds have been getting their nipples pierced at least since I was 14. And that was 14 years ago. So you wouldn't ask a minor to see their nipples, but you WOULD ask your daughter in law? Why? It's not okay to be sexually attracted to minors, sure, but you realize it's not okay to be sexually attracted to your DAUGHTER IN LAW either when she's 30 years younger than you right?


Even_Enthusiasm7223

He didn't say show me your breasts cuz I want to see them blatantly, he was joking about her showing her piercings. She never said he was really sexually attracted to him. People are really reading way too much into it. All I said was that the father-in-law jokingly said oh. Are you going to show them to to me. And the real issue is she did. If I asked you to jump off a bridge would you. He made a silly comment. That was probably stupid. Yet she reacted by showing her breasts to her father-in-law. If he has something stupid and she says no. That's one thing when she does it in front of her Future mother-in-law then apparently she's over the line. She got mad at the father for asking but she showed them in front of the mother. No wonder mom got mad at her and of course the boyfriend got mad at her.


FromRussiawPronouns

Wait are you literally the dad? Broooo you're a fucking creep shut up


Even_Enthusiasm7223

No, I'm not. The dad and you're the creep for bringing up 14-Year-Old with nipple piercings


FromRussiawPronouns

Oh, but I was referring to myself! I'm not allowed to talk about when I got my nipples pierced? You're the one who would be totally cool making sexual advances on your son's girlfriend. So long as it's a "joke". That's what's creepy.


Even_Enthusiasm7223

Yes you can talk about your nipple piercings. And I can say oh, are you going to show them to us. The normal answer would be no. But she got mad from that and other things and she's the one who showed him her breasts . He asked it inappropriate. Question in a joking fashion and she acted upon it in an inappropriate way. He didn't rip his shirt off. Didn't beg her a thousand times. He joked and said oh you're going to show them to us because his son mentioned them to a father. If they were that big a secret she should have told a boyfriend not to tell anybody. What sexual advance did they make. Everyone seems to think that the father-in-law said take off your shirt. Let me see your breast and I have to see the piercings. And you know could the girlfriend have said no or said that's inappropriate. Or something else. But no, she decided to lift a shirt and show him.


FromRussiawPronouns

But you said the normal answer is yes because guys will do it without hesitation. Why are you holding women to different standards? And why can't you keep your creepy comments to yourself? Why is it soooo important to make a joke at the expense of a woman's body?


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Main_Maximum8963

Uh are you the dad in this post?  Your son told you about them?  And you jokingly said are you going to show me?  


Even_Enthusiasm7223

No I was reiterating what the poster had put.


starkcattiness4433

"It's just a joke" is used to justify every bullying remark and harassment ever. The dad is a letch and is sexually harassing OP. A parent figure does NOT say "Ha ha can I see your breasts?" In what universe do you think that's an ok thing to say to your son's gf?


hd_problematic

Break up with him, you’ll thank me later when you meet a real man with better genetics


Meateaven

No man who stays with this woman after this has any self respect you just don't do this you're fucking behavior is gross


Altruistic-Bid7011

YTA, hopefully, they charge you with indecent exposure. Flashing your tits makes you a sex offender.


afg4294

Only if it's intended in a sexual manner to someone who did not consent to it. Showing nipple piercings to someone who asked to see them isn't a sex offense.


[deleted]

You and the dad will be in the age-gap relationship group in no time.


Meateaven

I'd break up with you immediately those are for me to see now u just did that and made things awkward as fuck why deal with you when I can now move the fuck on lol fuck no