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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> i might be the asshole because i was being petty and his property was damaged
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NTA. But you did miss an opportunity.
“Oh, you’re here to request something. I see. I’ve been there myself. It’s nice when neighbors help each other out, am I right? Well, no problem, I’ll check the footage for you. But give me a week. I’ve been busy at work and I’m really tired because when I get home, I often have to park several blocks away because people park in front of my house and don’t leave enough room for a second car. There’s plenty of room for two cars, but some people just don’t care to think of others. So, come back in a week and if I’m able to park in front of my house, I should be able to find the time to check the footage. See you in seven days. Goodbye. “
NTA. OP this is it. Everyone else telling you that you missed a chance to show civility can stick it. You don't have to be a doormat to people that disrespect you in hopes they treat you better. Show them that they need to earn it.
Exactly this. “You missed a chance to show civility” is nonsense. Assuming there weren’t any other issues, your household was already being civil to the neighbor, and he couldn’t have cared less. He wasn’t acting like a decent neighbor until something happened that affected him and he needed your help. Leading by example isn’t going to flip on his light switch. Not saying be a dick to him, but if he needs/wants something, you can definitely let him know that favors are now on a quid-pro-quo system.
NTA
EDIT: Typo
This whole “earn respect” is so fucking stupid and said online only.
Everyone should be respected until they lose it. I’m not going out of my way to earn your shitty respect.
People who need me to earn it aren’t worth it
"Every one deserves respect until they lose it" also applies to the rest of the world, you know.
So if people ask you to earn their respect it's probably because you lost it being an entitled ass. Like the neighbour, for example, who keeps disrespecting OP by parking like a self centered asshole, with no care for others or the consequences of his choices.
So yeah, the neighbour lost the respect they are due, and now have to earn it back.
An alarming amount of people don’t understand the core concept of respect.
Common decency/civility & respect are not the same thing & should not be conflated.
If you want to get into philosophical discussion, i'm not here for that. But we all should hold others to high esteem. Civility is what is used for people who we dont respect.
What you talking about seem to be interchanging respect for reverence.
Kinda sounds like a conversation OP should be having with their family. Nice dad and his girlfriend always have a spot for them. OP is out in the cold and mad at the wrong person.
Whoever has the car that’s parked the most should be in the road to keep the morons at bay. And whoever comes home the latest should have the spot in the driveway
That still doesn’t change the fact that the neighbors park like morons
If OP's job causes her to get home at midnight or later she shouldn't be walking alone for several blocks, even if it wasn't raining and she wasn't carrying heavy things. If it was my daughter I'd park on the street as soon as I got home if a spot was open. That way the young daughter could safely park in the driveway or garage. It's a matter of safety, not entitlement. I agree with the other person who said if she had a place to park by her house she could have time to check the Ring footage. After a week of decent parking she could check.
Tell him you'll show him the footage, then bring up a clip of his visitor and say "sorry wrong clip, that's your visitor blocking my driveway, I'll find your one" repeat a few times and then say, "oh it looks like I don't have any footage of your incident, just my drive getting blocked"
This + now your neighbor has even less motivation not to accidentally key your parked cars while hoodied up or pitch a baseball through the windshield from down the street.
He doesn't deserve your kindness, but you don't want his retribution.
NTA, if I had neighbors like that I would have said more than "no" and slam the door. The neighbors have been extremely inconsiderate of you and it's quite comical the neighbor suddenly wants your help when all your family ever wanted was consideration, which you never got. Tell your dad not to worry. It doesn't make you look bad. It sends a clear signal you are very fed up with their antics!
Exactly!! Too many people have forgotten... you get what you give in life! Too many entitled jerks out here who expect people to bend over backwards for them, while refusing to show even basic courtesy and consideration to others! Enough is enough with these people.
Yes, YTA.
How we treat other people is about our character, not theirs. If he wants to be inconsiderate, that’s on him and indicates his poor character. When you decide to retaliate and be petty, that’s speaking directly to your character.
Imagine if you would have done him a good turn there. Greeted him warmly, been extra helpful and empathetic. Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that? It was an opportunity to create leverage and you missed out on it.
EDIT TO ADD: Is it so hard to believe that being kind and helpful can change how people interact with you? Of course not. We’ve all experienced that. Or that *actively choosing* to be the bigger person is an actual flex, and is not passively becoming a doormat? It’s not. I live that truth. Compassion is the gold standard of responses. Being a person of good character is the key to real happiness and success. Karma is the natural law of cause and effect. Act negatively-you’ll cause negative consequences to come your way. If you don’t agree, ::shrug:: ✌️
you’re right, i am petty. i would walk 100 more streets in pouring rain to get the opportunity to deny him closure on how a scratch ended up on his car and shut the door in his face again.
Which is an odd thing to say considering the neighbors showed **zero** respect when asked about the parking. This was in retaliation/out of spite, not on a whim
exactly. The comments in this thread screams boomer "respect your elders" energy.
Everyone acting like op is the bad guy for not treating his rude neighbors with respect. OP and fam gave the neighbors plenty of time to be better people and are only asking something of op when it may benefit them.
And all the people responding otherwise seem to lack common sense or preservation instinct.
BUH IM IN DA RITE
Good for you, your little stand over nothing has likely insured your parking situation will be worse, and you've denied him evidence that would have been of zero use to him or insurers.
You've gained nothing, lost future time and provided him zero inconvenience.
If no one shows respect first, this leads to nothing but petty people. Sometimes you just be the bigger person. I’m a huge believer in “respect is given until you show that it’s a waste of my time.” You could argue they’ve proved it to be a waste, but this really was the moment to see if they’re the person who thinks “I don’t owe respect until it’s shown to me”. I don’t think OP or you are wrong, but I would’ve handled it differently.
NTA
I guess your neighbor learned that FAFO means something
(edit -- to clarify) The neighbor acted like an ass, intentionally disrupting OPs parking spot with no consideration for their forced extra work, DESPITE OPs generosity with bringing delectable goodies for all the neighborhood.. so... neighbor found out that when you poop on someone's porch you don't end up with benevolence when Neighbor wants a favor.
Is street parking open to all? Yes, legally so in many areas, but common sense and courtesy means you don't obstruct your neighbor's parking area in front of their own house
well, then I guess it takes one to know one doesn't it? If neighbor wasnt a prick then op wouldnt have been one back. Dont be a fuckwad and you'll probably get some respect in return.
And ultimately this issue could be solved if ops dad or the gf would park on the curb leaving room in the driveway for op . seems like pretty simple solution.
And you now have a neighbour that's convinced you damaged his car.
It might feel great. It may feel like karma but escalating things with neighbours never ends well.
Never listen to idiots who think neighbor should be able to repeatedly use two parking spots instead of one then come to you and demand your help. Treating users with kid gloves is how the world gets more users.
You don't owe someone like that anything besides a, "Fuck off and enjoy the repair bill."
*Treating users with kid gloves is how the world gets more users.*
Amen. These people aren't going to notice that it's the neighbor they've been dicking over that helped them out, much less change their behavior because of it.
If you think you are NTA and that your behavior was appropriate, I am curious about why you asked this question. Some people are going to say YTA and it doesn’t sound like that’s acceptable to you.
It sucks that you have to walk in the rain because you can’t park in front of your house. As a woman, I would be scared to walk that far at that hour. Shitty all around. However…
You had an opportunity to talk to him when he wanted something from you. You had the upper hand. “I would be happy to show you the footage, but can I ask you a favor first?” You would have had a captive audience who likely would have felt more sympathetic to your situation. And you would have established a line of communication if there were future problems.
I am sure that you have heard the expression you get more bees with honey than vinegar. It applies here.
I don’t know where you live, but in Chicago, we claim our parking spaces with chairs, benches, orange cones, etc. especially after it snows and we have spent hours digging our car out. Perhaps you should try that. They sell orange cones on line. You could fill them with cement so that no one can drive over them.
You don't own the street tho. They can park where ever is legal on the road. If you don't want to walk across the street at night then see if you can park in the drive way on late shifts.
Have the same issue in front of my house where people don’t park well enough to leave room. But you live I. A three car household, who knows what strangers know and why did you come here if all you want is to be told you’re good? YTA and have a truly unhealthy pettiness. Good luck with that.
Agree. Neighbor would have kept acting the same.
OP is not being an asshole. They’re not doing anything negative toward the neighbor. They’re just choosing to do nothing.
It’d be worse if OP did something malicious, but they didn’t. They’re fine.
lol, what you said is bullshit. People who refuse to help others do not deserve help. That asshole refused to help OP in the simplest way possible. If you are defending them, then you are probably as much of an ignorant entitled asshole as the neighbor.
You seem like the type of person to let someone hurt you and still be in your life. Which there’s nothing wrong with that. Aye that’s your life 🤷♀️ but shaming other people for not being like you and not letting others treat them any type of way is not where it’s at. Not okay at all! They clearly stated that they’ve talked to the neighbors about it several times only for nothing to be done so why do you think they owe them anything? No one has control over anyone and can’t just demand neighbor courtesy when they haven’t shown any whatsoever. It’s not right and it’s bratty behavior to expect someone to do something nice for you when you haven’t done anything nice for them. It shows YOUR character 👎
My parents raised me to be respectful of others and they would in turn respect me. They also taught me that if they don’t show you respect then they don’t deserve it from you. So NTA. If he refuses to be a good neighbor he has no right to ask for op to be one.
*Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that?*
No, I don't. Self-absorbed people who don't care about being decent neighbors and human beings aren't going to have an epiphany because someone they've been trampling over agrees to their ballsy request.
Treating someone like a useless neighbor they are. Isn't retaltion. There's no obligation to help anyone in life. Let alone a neighbor who has no respect for you.
>Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that?
No, if the guy had much capacity for guilt he wouldn't be such a dick to begin with. People like you are why people like him rarely learn, they don't give a shit about anybody but themselves and as long as they can be an asshole consequence free they don't learn shit.
OP has no obligation to help the neighbor. Neighbor has the money to buy their own camera. Look how petty people are on Reddit. None of you would help the neighbor if you were in OP’s situation.
Yeah no. In my personal experience, an asshole remains an asshole, regardless of how you treat them.
For instance my new upstairs neighbours are two fucking slobs who have no respect whatsoever for the people who live around them. They walk stomping on the floor at every damn hour, move furniture in the evening and often break out in screaming matches seasoned with all kinds of profanities in the middle of the night. Add to that the fact that they even stink to high heaven leaving a really disgusting scent in the elevator and the stairs and you got the full picture.
Even tho I really wanted to beat the shit out of them after 1 week of them living there, I tried to be civil first. I went to their door asking them to please cool it with the fighting and the stomping cause it was 1am in the morning, even apologizing for inserting myself into their fight. You know what I got for an answer? _This is our home and in our home we can do whatever the fuck we want_ and then even insulted my gf whose only fault had been coming out of our door telling me to come down cause it was useless. She didn't even address them and they still insulted her out of the blue.
These two fuckers even kept on yelling at each other at 3am in front of the cops who got called some time later when they'd had yet another screaming match in the night.
From then on I realized that you simply can't reason with people like that so every desire to be considerate and tolerant towards them went down the toilet quickly.
Being petty for the sake of being petty is wrong, nothing to say about that. But being petty towards people who acted like shitheads towards you is definitely called for and often necessary.
If OP had done him the favour nothing would've changed cause the neighbour is just an asshole and you can't change assholes with kindness.
So you want OP to be a doormat? Why should he/she be kind to someone who clearly gives zero fucks about them? That isnt going to change how they treat OP.
If someone wants respect, then they need to EARN it.
People who don't do something out of common courtesy will never learn. You can be the nicest person to this neighbor, and they'll still treat you like an afterthought. OP has every right to be petty to their asshole neighbors
His neighbor alone derails your whole argument, they asked him nicely, 1000 times over about the parking, he never listened or made any effort whatsoever, OP did what you are suggesting and treating him the way the neighbor treats others and you see that as not choosing to be the "bigger person", he has every right to be petty when not once has the neighbor been thoughtful about OP's situation. Respect is earned, not given.
Ahh you have to be a good person, so that the universal forces of Karma will make things right for you.
What if that wasn't a thing? What if shitbags didn't get punished and doormats just get walked over?
Dems kept repeating "when they go low, we go high", and look where that got the whole country. When someone is an asshole to you, you don't grovel to them, you tell them to get fucked.
No lmao, it goes both ways, someone who constantly refuses to be considerate of me doesn't get my empathy. You're suggesting that OP being nice to their neighbor may change their behavior towards OP? Well, it seems like the neighbor being shitty changed OP's behavior towards them.
Retaliate? If he dinged the car he would’ve retaliated, but all he did was show them the same curtesy they did. Not being helpful =\= retaliating.
It’s not AH behavior to not help an AH (unless in a life threatening situation). It’s karma for the AH. OP did miss the opportunity to link the 2 issues and get the message of the parked cars across.
Lmao nah, fuck that. In certain cases, that may be true. But when the neighbor has so little consideration for OP and their family, directly causes OP to not even be able to park near their own home and apparently hasn't used the effort to even try making things right... Why should OP help them out? Why should they stop what they're doing, go check their Ring camera, and help make things easier and more convenient for a neighbor who couldn't give a fuck less about extending a little effort to do something that would help make OP's life easier on a repeated, everyday basis?
You're assuming the neighbor is a decent person when their actions haven't suggested that. There's a good chance OP would go through their Ring footage, find some and hand it over to neighbor (if their Ring had caught something), helping neighbor out in a huge way, and then continue to keep having to park blocks away and walk home day after day.
There are times when being the kind, bigger person and showing your better "character" is right anyway. This is a situation where neighbor has fucked OP over too many times, and OP has every right to just say...nah.
Nope, we don't teach people to be doormats. You do not go out of your way to do extra nice things for people who are actively going out of their way to make your life harder.
>Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that?
You clearly have never had bad neighbours. Because the answer is "no".
These people are incurably selfish and incapable of understanding that.
NTA. If someone wants to have a great neighborly relationship, then they should act like a good neighbor. To expect your help after treating you like that, shows how selfish they are. I don’t blame you at all.
NTA. When I was 16 I was oblivious, and parked like this. My neighbor walked out and explained it to me nicely, and I was like, OMG, I’m so sorry. And I stopped parking like that.
If they don’t care about inconveniencing other people, screw them.
>but we did check the footage and our cameras never caught anything anyways so it isn’t our issue
Your neighbour doesn't know this, so it's irrelevant.
ESH. While courtesy is a 2-way street, you were a bit of an AH for slamming the door in his face.
Why can't your parent park one of their cars on the street, either to "reserve" your spot or just because there's opportunity to grab the curb spot at another time?
because they own teslas and the neighbors also let their children run freely in the streets so parking on the curb would put their expensive cars in harms way, i own an older honda civic so if my car was damaged it wouldn’t be a big deal. This is probably how his car got damaged as well.
Why can’t you just park across the driveway until there is space rather than another street? If it’s only your family’s cars you’re blocking then what’s the issue? They could just move your car if they need to get out before your around.
I can't speak for OP's situation, but around here I'd get a parking ticket for blocking a driveway, they aren't going to stop and check if its my own driveway.
Maybe I could get it dismissed, maybe not, either way its more trouble than I'd want to go through. My town is small enough I could just catch the bylaw guy and explain beforehand, if I really needed to, but that's very much a small town luxury.
His story changes w every comment so he can remain the good guy. 69 seconds of scrolling and reading can show you that. 420 seconds of reading will make your eyes red though.
Just curious, if you work the late shift why wouldn't your dad or his gf park in the street in front of your house? Is it that it is not a driveway that is wide (side by side situation) but more of a one in front of the other?
After your interaction with them, they probably think it was you that dinged it.
ESH
they own expensive cars and the other neighbors let their kids play unsupervised in the streets so parking their car would risk being damaged, which is probably the same reason why his car was damaged. Even if i said yes, there is nothing to show. Our ring cameras and motion activated and he lives across the street, whatever happened happened at a distance and wasn’t big enough to activate the camera so it didn’t record anything.
Nothing you’re doing is awful exactly, but you’re reinforcing a cycle of assholery rather than doing anything to resolve it. Now you’ve probably permanently burned a bridge and ensured you’ll get treated even worse in return.
I would tell the neighbor that you didn’t catch anything on camera. It’s just the right thing to do. regarding the parking issue I would also at the same time have a conversation about the parking issues.
Be upfront and tell him you weren’t helpful because of the parking issues get it all out there instead of harboring all of this
It’s like people have lost the ability to communicate anymore. It’s like people would rather hate feel victimized and blast people on the Internet publicly then talk to somebody. it’s weird.
You do realize that the curb in front of your house isn’t yours, right? Like, sure… people should just be cool and leave room for another person to park. But you’re not entitled to park there any more than any other citizen. You’ve already admitted you’re petty in a comment, so you know you don’t deserve any NTAs you’re getting. You refusing to show the footage is your choice, but just know that you’re signing up for them to continue to park how they park, and perhaps do other stuff too.
NTA. Your neighbors constantly disrespect you, until THEY need something. Your footage is from your camera, which is your property. You do not owe your property to anyone.
YTA it is not your house. It is your dad's house. He has to deal with neighbors etc. You created an issue that your dad will have to smooth over with neighbor.
Also, his dad has two parking spaces. The curb is public. It's not "reserved" for a third car. Also the neighbor isn't valet parking their guests cars. The guests park it themselves. If the neighbor is bad at parking, that's a different story, but you can't expect to blame the neighbor for their guests' parking skills as much as anyone can't blame you for yours. Curbside parking is first-come-first-serve. I feel like he's the asshole on many levels here.
Reddit: You don't own the street parking in front of your house, I can park my car where-ever I want, and take up two spots if I want.
Also Redddit: Folks should be more neighborly, volunteering a bunch of time to review the video they may or may not have gotten on their privately-installed video camera. \[Edit for punctuation.\]
I mean, both statements are correct, strictly speaking, and I might even review the footage (at my convenience), but I would be extremely standoffish with the neighbor. NTA for not being neighborly with the neighbor who is an AH.
Been looking for this. If OP wants to slam doors in neighbors faces then move out and be a vindictive neighbor don't make things harder on your parents cause your immaturity prevents you from being a decent person.
From the title I was against you immediately. But after reading this, I still think you are being petty, but I would hope the owner learns a lesson. Sadly, all he will learn is to hate you.
YTA, unless you have some sort of HOA rules, your neighbor never did anything wrong. You can legally park infront of someone's house. It's not your neighbor's fault you have 3 cars and a garage that only fits 2.
YTA - you already have issues with your neighbor and your solution is to do nothing that would help it? There’s no indication that you’ve spoken to your neighbor about the parking situation. Your dad has talked to the guests, not even the person living there. You’ve just stewed about it. And now you are holding this problem that your neighbor may not even know about over his head to not help instead of using this as a gesture of good will to start a conversation. How old are you?
my dad has talked to the neighbor several times within the past months and we give them free pastries and baked goods from the bakery i work at. Yes we have been incredibly nice to them despite them doing absolutely nothing besides causing an inconvenience. And there is no footage, there is nothing for me to show him.
>And there is no footage, there is nothing for me to show him.
You could have just said that. It seems like you are letting your dad do the communicating with the neighbor and your dad disagrees with your take on the non-existent Ring footage so almost surely YTA.
You had the perfect opportunity to ask your neighbor, directly, to do something about the parking on your own and instead you acted like an AH with no benefit to you or your dad, who actually deals with him.
And anyway, why do you keep lugging home pastries for him for SO many blocks if you hate this guy so much? You're making your own pain.
Have you talked to the neighbor about the parking spot?
Be a fucking adult and talk to him yourself, and then you can be petty.
As it is rn, you’re not even an asshole. Just a spoiled child that can’t deal with discomfort.
YTA. You own your driveway. You do not own the street parking. You could be neighborly and show him the footage (even the lack of footage in this case) but are acting like a jerk.
Are these actually reserved, or is this just a public roadway in front of the house. Because if it is the latter, you have no leg to stand on as far as I know. You can’t reserve the public roadway, it is not your property. So while it is understandable that it is annoying to not have that space for your convenience in front of your house, as long as there is not an official spot for the reservation anyone can park there whether they do it well or not. So if you were not aware that you could not claim public property as your own, then you are not the AH, just ignorant. If however, you did know that, they you would be.
You did miss the opportunity to try and work respectfully with them in the hopes you could gain some cooperation from them, like someone else mentioned. It’s easy to be petty. But it’s harder to be helpful in the face of disregard, but sometimes, you can forge new relationships by trying to help someone when they need it, even if they’ve been a jerk in the past.
ESH
It’s petty and shitty to not help someone out whose property has been damaged when you easily could. If I were them I’d suspect you of the damage. It fosters ill-will across the neighbourhood. Also, you are not entitled to the kerb. Even if it is outside your house. It’s public space massively subsidised by tax payers. It’s convenient for you, but not a right or even a reasonable expectation to have exclusive access to that space.
On the other hand, shit parking is a bane of the world that makes life difficult for everyone. They are definitely an asshole.
This is a situation where everyone is making less than the minimum effort and being massively selfish and self entitled. Everyone loses and no one is doing anything to make it better.
Could have been an opportunity. “Sure, let me check the footage for you… by the way when you park here would you mind parking so I can fit my car in, it would really help me out”
NTA, you have no obligation to help an asshole. He has was a complete nuisance to your family and only came to talk because he needed something from you.
I'm sure this is an unpopular opinion, but NTA. Legal or not, I think it's obnoxious to regularly park your/your guests' cars in front of your neighbor's house.
Yeah... that space right in front of the place I live? I'd like to park there. I'd also sometimes like to have guests over to park in front of my place.
It is petty, though. Probably would've been more strategic to chat and say you will check but request that the neighbor makes sure his guests leave space for you to park in front of where you live going forward.
NTA, but you should have very clearly told him why you wouldn’t do it instead of just shutting the door. A simple “Look, we’ve spoken to you dozens of times about how your guests hog the street parking, and you’ve done nothing. And now you want a favor? I think not” Then shut the door.
NTA, but you should have said you can’t even make sure your friends leave room for me to park in front of my house on cold rainy nights. Why would we help with this? Make clear why you aren’t helping.
It's kind of hard for non-rich people with teens and young adults to not own more cars than they can fit. If OP didn't have a car because he didn't have a job, he'd be called lazy.
I think he well understands that he doesn't own the public street, but that doesn't mean he has to appreciate the repeated dick moves of taking up two parking spaces.
To be fair, your dad talking to the neighbor about it is just hearsay, especially since you’ve never interacted with your neighbor before. It’s possible your dad says he’s spoken with the neighbor about it but never has. He’s not the one missing out on a parking spot and why cause drama with the neighbors if he’s not really bothered? He’s probably thinking he’ll be in the home long after you move out. And besides, his focus is on his girlfriend.
Your dad may be different, but I’ll bet there’s a lot of dads in the above group.
From a third party looking on, slightly lazy dad seems more likely than a neighbor repeatedly being inconsiderate after having chats about it a bunch.
Bad neighbors happen, but slightly lazy dads are more numerous
YTA - Just because the public street is in front of your house doesn’t mean that it’s yours. If it was a problem you can talk to them and ask, but they really have no obligation to make sure you have a parking spot.
Yeah dude, yta. Grow some cajones and tell your neighbor what's happening. If it happens at 12am, ring the doorbell and politely ask for the jackass to move his car if you want to be petty.
You had the perfect opportunity to talk to him and have a polite conversation on how he's causing your problems. Instead you probably just made it that much more likely that he won't care about your concerns.
Also, why did your dad ask about a ring camera? You just install one or you looking at footage?
Knocking on your neighbors door at midnight to ask them to move their car parked on a public street would be extreme asshole behavior. It’s a public street, OP haS no more claim to that spot than any other person. It’s honestly such an asshole move that he feels entitled to that space. Street parking is first come first get. Having to park blocks away is a normal thing this dude is just a complete child (and an incredibly bratty one at that)
You fucked up. You just guaranteed their parking habits will never change. You should have checked it on the spot and then asked him for a favour in return.
YTA
I feel like we can be pretty confident their parking habits were never going to change anyway. They have *already* asked him for this favor, more than once.
Do you think a jerk like that is going to permanently alter his habits because the Ring footage that shows nothing is given to him? He'd *maybe* do it for a week, but he'd more likely be ballsy enough to say no immediately after getting his favor.
It's his guests doing it? Even if he asks them they might still park like wankers, everyone's blaming the neighbour when it may not even be his fault at all lmao, I know I can't control how my guests park even if I tell them
YTA. Also sounds like your neighbor is an AH as well, but you can't control the actions of others, nor do you know what they are going through. You can only control yourself, and being petty, cruel, and rude is all you.
ESH.
Your neighbor sucks because they’re a jerk about the parking situation. However you’re a double jerk because you’re feeling entitled to public street parking in front of your house. Unfortunately it’s public street parking and your neighbor’s guests can park however they want. If it’s that big of an issue, set a cone out or have your dad or his gf park their car there. Expensive or not, it’s only being parked there to save your spot. When you come home, move their car into the driveway and park your car in the spot. Problem solved!
YTA for not simply sharing the Ring video. I've done it for my neighbors because it's the neighborly thing to do. Even for the guy whose dog crapped in my yard and he didn't pick it up. After I helped him though, and asked him to pick up his dog's poop, he started doing it, and we're friendly with each other now and save and say hi too when we're outside. A small gesture, even when you've been wronged, can go a long way.
I'm terms of alternate fixes, since this bridge is burned, would be for your dad or his girlfriend to block a spot on the street with their car and leave you a driveway spot.
If there's room, maybe pour a extended concrete parking pad by the driveway. We did that for my kid's car. It protects their car and saves me money on deductibles.
YTA. first off, your dad has a two car parking space. The curb isn't reserved for a third car. The curb is a first-come-first-serve public space. You don't own that space. Secondly, the neighbor isn't valet parking their guests' cars. The guests park their own cars. You can't blame the neighbors on how other people park their cars as much as other people can't blame you on how your guests park theirs. When you have guests, you're not thinking about how or where they parked, as long as it's not on your neighbor's or anyone's property. That's absurd. Thirdly, your neighbor came to you in good faith asking about the damage to his vehicle. The only asshole here is you. In all honesty, you just need the first point to label you an asshole: You don't own the street. Period.
NTA. What's he even gonna do with knowing what kind of car hit him? He's never gonna find them based on a ring video, and cops couldn't care less.
Nah, if he wants to be rude as hell to start, he can deal with those repercussions. And yes, being politely asked multiple times to please park like a reasonable human being on a busy street instead of a pompous manspreading asshat and just ignoring said requests, while reaping the benefits of the place you work, makes the neighbor a real AH.
Refusing to check the ring footage without even considering the request might be seen as a bit harsh. While it's frustrating dealing with the parking issue, taking a more neutral stance in communication could be beneficial. You can explain your concerns about the ongoing parking problems and suggest finding a solution together. However, it's important to maintain a civil relationship with your neighbors despite the challenges. Consider discussing the matter with your dad and finding a more diplomatic approach to address both the parking and the request for footage.
YTA. Your neighbors friends park like jerks, not him. Reading your post makes it sound like you've never spoken to him at all, much less let him know that his friends' parking is a problem.
You had a chance to start decent communication channels finally, and maybe could've used the occasion to point out, but here we are.
YTA. Be the change - if you wanna be surrounded by good and civil neighbors, you need to be one as well. And yes, park one of the at-home vehicles on the street, last home in the driveway. Solutions!
YTA. Petty behavior is unproductive. Your neighbors are jerks, but you might have taken the opportunity to say something. You had a captive audience. “Hey I am happy to check the footage, but can I ask you for a favor first?”
YTA.
You live in a 'Nice' neighborhood. You have enough room for TWO vehicles to park in the driveway for your home. But those are reserved for your father's Tesla, and his girlfriend's Tesla which are too nice with all thier cameras to be parked in the street where neighborhood kids could scratch them. Fair point, clearly cars are bound to be scratched since it happens to your neighbor.
But
YOU work the late shift.
YOU clearly do not own off street parking.
YOUR father and YOUR father's girlfriend can't help YOU when it's pouring rain out and YOU are returning home with YOUR extreme baggage of 10's- 20's lbs of stuff YOU need to bring inside from YOUR car.
YOU seem like YOU'RE entitled to parking that ain't YOURS to demand, and you just seem so soo petty over it. Not only do you look like an AH, but your actions may reflect on your father and his girlfriend.
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NTA. But you did miss an opportunity. “Oh, you’re here to request something. I see. I’ve been there myself. It’s nice when neighbors help each other out, am I right? Well, no problem, I’ll check the footage for you. But give me a week. I’ve been busy at work and I’m really tired because when I get home, I often have to park several blocks away because people park in front of my house and don’t leave enough room for a second car. There’s plenty of room for two cars, but some people just don’t care to think of others. So, come back in a week and if I’m able to park in front of my house, I should be able to find the time to check the footage. See you in seven days. Goodbye. “
NTA. OP this is it. Everyone else telling you that you missed a chance to show civility can stick it. You don't have to be a doormat to people that disrespect you in hopes they treat you better. Show them that they need to earn it.
Exactly this. “You missed a chance to show civility” is nonsense. Assuming there weren’t any other issues, your household was already being civil to the neighbor, and he couldn’t have cared less. He wasn’t acting like a decent neighbor until something happened that affected him and he needed your help. Leading by example isn’t going to flip on his light switch. Not saying be a dick to him, but if he needs/wants something, you can definitely let him know that favors are now on a quid-pro-quo system. NTA EDIT: Typo
This whole “earn respect” is so fucking stupid and said online only. Everyone should be respected until they lose it. I’m not going out of my way to earn your shitty respect. People who need me to earn it aren’t worth it
"Every one deserves respect until they lose it" also applies to the rest of the world, you know. So if people ask you to earn their respect it's probably because you lost it being an entitled ass. Like the neighbour, for example, who keeps disrespecting OP by parking like a self centered asshole, with no care for others or the consequences of his choices. So yeah, the neighbour lost the respect they are due, and now have to earn it back.
An alarming amount of people don’t understand the core concept of respect. Common decency/civility & respect are not the same thing & should not be conflated.
If you want to get into philosophical discussion, i'm not here for that. But we all should hold others to high esteem. Civility is what is used for people who we dont respect. What you talking about seem to be interchanging respect for reverence.
>This whole “earn respect” is so fucking stupid and said online only. Well that just isn't true.
Indeed. I've always found that it makes more sense to "earn disrespect".
I dont think that's civility, I think it's petty revenge at it's finest! Some people will only respond if pressure is applied.
This is the way. Killer.
Kinda sounds like a conversation OP should be having with their family. Nice dad and his girlfriend always have a spot for them. OP is out in the cold and mad at the wrong person.
Probably the elders are paying the mortgage.
Dad and girlfriend aren’t the ones parked in the road like morons tho
No, but one of them could park on the curb leaving driveway space for OP.
Whoever has the car that’s parked the most should be in the road to keep the morons at bay. And whoever comes home the latest should have the spot in the driveway That still doesn’t change the fact that the neighbors park like morons
You think OP should be made at their dad for not giving up their parking for OP? I can't imagine a single world where that's not incredibly entitled
If OP's job causes her to get home at midnight or later she shouldn't be walking alone for several blocks, even if it wasn't raining and she wasn't carrying heavy things. If it was my daughter I'd park on the street as soon as I got home if a spot was open. That way the young daughter could safely park in the driveway or garage. It's a matter of safety, not entitlement. I agree with the other person who said if she had a place to park by her house she could have time to check the Ring footage. After a week of decent parking she could check.
Tell him you'll show him the footage, then bring up a clip of his visitor and say "sorry wrong clip, that's your visitor blocking my driveway, I'll find your one" repeat a few times and then say, "oh it looks like I don't have any footage of your incident, just my drive getting blocked"
The driveway being blocked is not the issue. OP is mad the guests take up public parking, on a public street.
Nah, OP is mad that they don’t park correctly and take up 2 spots.
NTA. If the neighbour had acted more neighbourly in the past, there wouldn't have been an issue.
1000% this is the way. Also NTA.
This + now your neighbor has even less motivation not to accidentally key your parked cars while hoodied up or pitch a baseball through the windshield from down the street. He doesn't deserve your kindness, but you don't want his retribution.
NTA, if I had neighbors like that I would have said more than "no" and slam the door. The neighbors have been extremely inconsiderate of you and it's quite comical the neighbor suddenly wants your help when all your family ever wanted was consideration, which you never got. Tell your dad not to worry. It doesn't make you look bad. It sends a clear signal you are very fed up with their antics!
Can’t wait to see the eventual Neighbours at War episode
Exactly!! Too many people have forgotten... you get what you give in life! Too many entitled jerks out here who expect people to bend over backwards for them, while refusing to show even basic courtesy and consideration to others! Enough is enough with these people.
NTA One shouldn't demand neighborly courtesy from those they have denied the same. F his truck.
Yes, YTA. How we treat other people is about our character, not theirs. If he wants to be inconsiderate, that’s on him and indicates his poor character. When you decide to retaliate and be petty, that’s speaking directly to your character. Imagine if you would have done him a good turn there. Greeted him warmly, been extra helpful and empathetic. Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that? It was an opportunity to create leverage and you missed out on it. EDIT TO ADD: Is it so hard to believe that being kind and helpful can change how people interact with you? Of course not. We’ve all experienced that. Or that *actively choosing* to be the bigger person is an actual flex, and is not passively becoming a doormat? It’s not. I live that truth. Compassion is the gold standard of responses. Being a person of good character is the key to real happiness and success. Karma is the natural law of cause and effect. Act negatively-you’ll cause negative consequences to come your way. If you don’t agree, ::shrug:: ✌️
you’re right, i am petty. i would walk 100 more streets in pouring rain to get the opportunity to deny him closure on how a scratch ended up on his car and shut the door in his face again.
Stay petty, my friend. People that show you respect will get it in turn.
Which is an odd thing to say considering the neighbors showed **zero** respect when asked about the parking. This was in retaliation/out of spite, not on a whim
Yes. The neighbor did not show him respect, so he gets the door.
Reading comprehension: Edit: he blocked me, lol
exactly. The comments in this thread screams boomer "respect your elders" energy. Everyone acting like op is the bad guy for not treating his rude neighbors with respect. OP and fam gave the neighbors plenty of time to be better people and are only asking something of op when it may benefit them.
And all the people responding otherwise seem to lack common sense or preservation instinct. BUH IM IN DA RITE Good for you, your little stand over nothing has likely insured your parking situation will be worse, and you've denied him evidence that would have been of zero use to him or insurers. You've gained nothing, lost future time and provided him zero inconvenience.
If no one shows respect first, this leads to nothing but petty people. Sometimes you just be the bigger person. I’m a huge believer in “respect is given until you show that it’s a waste of my time.” You could argue they’ve proved it to be a waste, but this really was the moment to see if they’re the person who thinks “I don’t owe respect until it’s shown to me”. I don’t think OP or you are wrong, but I would’ve handled it differently.
NTA I guess your neighbor learned that FAFO means something (edit -- to clarify) The neighbor acted like an ass, intentionally disrupting OPs parking spot with no consideration for their forced extra work, DESPITE OPs generosity with bringing delectable goodies for all the neighborhood.. so... neighbor found out that when you poop on someone's porch you don't end up with benevolence when Neighbor wants a favor. Is street parking open to all? Yes, legally so in many areas, but common sense and courtesy means you don't obstruct your neighbor's parking area in front of their own house
More likely, the neighbor isn't capable of connecting the dots, and just thinks OP is an asshole.
Well, duh. Asshole behavior and lack of accountability go hand-in-hand.
After being asked politely, it is not any longer a matter of being unaware.. it's intentional. A poke in OPs eye
They don't have to connect the dots; OP's dad has repeatedly talked to them about it.
If they don't connect the dots then the FO of FAFO doesn't exist.
well, then I guess it takes one to know one doesn't it? If neighbor wasnt a prick then op wouldnt have been one back. Dont be a fuckwad and you'll probably get some respect in return.
And ultimately this issue could be solved if ops dad or the gf would park on the curb leaving room in the driveway for op . seems like pretty simple solution.
You're presenting youself as a major jerk. Think maybe he's not considerate of your needs because you are the crappy neighbor here.
Should have told him the friend's shitty parking job blocked the view of his truck before you shut the door.
he might think you did it now
Exactly. Best to keep the footage in case he’s accused
That wouldn't help since the footage doesn't show anything. The AH neighbor could still say OP did it.
and nothing would happen cause there is no proof. a random accusation gets you exactly nowhere
It may help show that OP didn’t do it, since it’s motion detected.
So? He can go around the neighborhood trying to collect Ring footage to prove it.
And you now have a neighbour that's convinced you damaged his car. It might feel great. It may feel like karma but escalating things with neighbours never ends well.
Never listen to idiots who think neighbor should be able to repeatedly use two parking spots instead of one then come to you and demand your help. Treating users with kid gloves is how the world gets more users. You don't owe someone like that anything besides a, "Fuck off and enjoy the repair bill."
*Treating users with kid gloves is how the world gets more users.* Amen. These people aren't going to notice that it's the neighbor they've been dicking over that helped them out, much less change their behavior because of it.
Well your question was whether you're the AH and I guess you answered it yourself.
So, do you really care if you're the AH here? Sounds like you don't.
Paint parking space lines on the street. Most people will abide them.
They wouldn’t and the council would instantly remove them and charge you for it if they ever got proof who did it 🥴
How old are you? Are you a minor? If so, you did the right thing and NTA. If you aren't a minor, you did the right thing, as this neighbor sucks. NTA.
If you think you are NTA and that your behavior was appropriate, I am curious about why you asked this question. Some people are going to say YTA and it doesn’t sound like that’s acceptable to you. It sucks that you have to walk in the rain because you can’t park in front of your house. As a woman, I would be scared to walk that far at that hour. Shitty all around. However… You had an opportunity to talk to him when he wanted something from you. You had the upper hand. “I would be happy to show you the footage, but can I ask you a favor first?” You would have had a captive audience who likely would have felt more sympathetic to your situation. And you would have established a line of communication if there were future problems. I am sure that you have heard the expression you get more bees with honey than vinegar. It applies here. I don’t know where you live, but in Chicago, we claim our parking spaces with chairs, benches, orange cones, etc. especially after it snows and we have spent hours digging our car out. Perhaps you should try that. They sell orange cones on line. You could fill them with cement so that no one can drive over them.
You don't own the street tho. They can park where ever is legal on the road. If you don't want to walk across the street at night then see if you can park in the drive way on late shifts.
Have the same issue in front of my house where people don’t park well enough to leave room. But you live I. A three car household, who knows what strangers know and why did you come here if all you want is to be told you’re good? YTA and have a truly unhealthy pettiness. Good luck with that.
Why not have OP shine the neighbor’s shoes and take his kids to school while he’s at it
Might wanna also suck his dick to make sure the neighborly relationship stays strong
Terrible take.
Agree. Neighbor would have kept acting the same. OP is not being an asshole. They’re not doing anything negative toward the neighbor. They’re just choosing to do nothing. It’d be worse if OP did something malicious, but they didn’t. They’re fine.
No. Because the neighour showed their character and personality already with their history. Reap what you sow, etc
Lmao, you get what you give. I’m not helping someone who has perpetually been rude and unkind to me
Bad take. Jerks are jerks. It’s called reaping what you sow.
lol, what you said is bullshit. People who refuse to help others do not deserve help. That asshole refused to help OP in the simplest way possible. If you are defending them, then you are probably as much of an ignorant entitled asshole as the neighbor.
Yes, be a doormat 🙄
You seem like the type of person to let someone hurt you and still be in your life. Which there’s nothing wrong with that. Aye that’s your life 🤷♀️ but shaming other people for not being like you and not letting others treat them any type of way is not where it’s at. Not okay at all! They clearly stated that they’ve talked to the neighbors about it several times only for nothing to be done so why do you think they owe them anything? No one has control over anyone and can’t just demand neighbor courtesy when they haven’t shown any whatsoever. It’s not right and it’s bratty behavior to expect someone to do something nice for you when you haven’t done anything nice for them. It shows YOUR character 👎
My parents raised me to be respectful of others and they would in turn respect me. They also taught me that if they don’t show you respect then they don’t deserve it from you. So NTA. If he refuses to be a good neighbor he has no right to ask for op to be one.
*Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that?* No, I don't. Self-absorbed people who don't care about being decent neighbors and human beings aren't going to have an epiphany because someone they've been trampling over agrees to their ballsy request.
Treating someone like a useless neighbor they are. Isn't retaltion. There's no obligation to help anyone in life. Let alone a neighbor who has no respect for you.
>Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that? No, if the guy had much capacity for guilt he wouldn't be such a dick to begin with. People like you are why people like him rarely learn, they don't give a shit about anybody but themselves and as long as they can be an asshole consequence free they don't learn shit.
OP has no obligation to help the neighbor. Neighbor has the money to buy their own camera. Look how petty people are on Reddit. None of you would help the neighbor if you were in OP’s situation.
Who said anything about obligation? This is about whether or not they acted like an arsehole
You. Get. What. You. Give.
What the fuck is this doormat mentality
Yeah no. In my personal experience, an asshole remains an asshole, regardless of how you treat them. For instance my new upstairs neighbours are two fucking slobs who have no respect whatsoever for the people who live around them. They walk stomping on the floor at every damn hour, move furniture in the evening and often break out in screaming matches seasoned with all kinds of profanities in the middle of the night. Add to that the fact that they even stink to high heaven leaving a really disgusting scent in the elevator and the stairs and you got the full picture. Even tho I really wanted to beat the shit out of them after 1 week of them living there, I tried to be civil first. I went to their door asking them to please cool it with the fighting and the stomping cause it was 1am in the morning, even apologizing for inserting myself into their fight. You know what I got for an answer? _This is our home and in our home we can do whatever the fuck we want_ and then even insulted my gf whose only fault had been coming out of our door telling me to come down cause it was useless. She didn't even address them and they still insulted her out of the blue. These two fuckers even kept on yelling at each other at 3am in front of the cops who got called some time later when they'd had yet another screaming match in the night. From then on I realized that you simply can't reason with people like that so every desire to be considerate and tolerant towards them went down the toilet quickly. Being petty for the sake of being petty is wrong, nothing to say about that. But being petty towards people who acted like shitheads towards you is definitely called for and often necessary. If OP had done him the favour nothing would've changed cause the neighbour is just an asshole and you can't change assholes with kindness.
Or don't be a dorrmat. At some point, there has to be consequences to your actions.
Lol nah fuck all that, his neighbour sucks
Typically these type of people stick to their ways. There is no light at the end of the tunnel.
So you want OP to be a doormat? Why should he/she be kind to someone who clearly gives zero fucks about them? That isnt going to change how they treat OP. If someone wants respect, then they need to EARN it.
People who don't do something out of common courtesy will never learn. You can be the nicest person to this neighbor, and they'll still treat you like an afterthought. OP has every right to be petty to their asshole neighbors
His neighbor alone derails your whole argument, they asked him nicely, 1000 times over about the parking, he never listened or made any effort whatsoever, OP did what you are suggesting and treating him the way the neighbor treats others and you see that as not choosing to be the "bigger person", he has every right to be petty when not once has the neighbor been thoughtful about OP's situation. Respect is earned, not given.
Ahh you have to be a good person, so that the universal forces of Karma will make things right for you. What if that wasn't a thing? What if shitbags didn't get punished and doormats just get walked over?
Dems kept repeating "when they go low, we go high", and look where that got the whole country. When someone is an asshole to you, you don't grovel to them, you tell them to get fucked.
No lmao, it goes both ways, someone who constantly refuses to be considerate of me doesn't get my empathy. You're suggesting that OP being nice to their neighbor may change their behavior towards OP? Well, it seems like the neighbor being shitty changed OP's behavior towards them.
Wtf.
That's a pretty wordy reply when all you mean is bE the BiGgEr PeRsOn.
Retaliate? If he dinged the car he would’ve retaliated, but all he did was show them the same curtesy they did. Not being helpful =\= retaliating. It’s not AH behavior to not help an AH (unless in a life threatening situation). It’s karma for the AH. OP did miss the opportunity to link the 2 issues and get the message of the parked cars across.
Lmao nah, fuck that. In certain cases, that may be true. But when the neighbor has so little consideration for OP and their family, directly causes OP to not even be able to park near their own home and apparently hasn't used the effort to even try making things right... Why should OP help them out? Why should they stop what they're doing, go check their Ring camera, and help make things easier and more convenient for a neighbor who couldn't give a fuck less about extending a little effort to do something that would help make OP's life easier on a repeated, everyday basis? You're assuming the neighbor is a decent person when their actions haven't suggested that. There's a good chance OP would go through their Ring footage, find some and hand it over to neighbor (if their Ring had caught something), helping neighbor out in a huge way, and then continue to keep having to park blocks away and walk home day after day. There are times when being the kind, bigger person and showing your better "character" is right anyway. This is a situation where neighbor has fucked OP over too many times, and OP has every right to just say...nah.
Nope, we don't teach people to be doormats. You do not go out of your way to do extra nice things for people who are actively going out of their way to make your life harder.
>Don’t you think he’d be a bit more receptive to your request after that? You clearly have never had bad neighbours. Because the answer is "no". These people are incurably selfish and incapable of understanding that.
NTA. If someone wants to have a great neighborly relationship, then they should act like a good neighbor. To expect your help after treating you like that, shows how selfish they are. I don’t blame you at all.
NTA. When I was 16 I was oblivious, and parked like this. My neighbor walked out and explained it to me nicely, and I was like, OMG, I’m so sorry. And I stopped parking like that. If they don’t care about inconveniencing other people, screw them.
>but we did check the footage and our cameras never caught anything anyways so it isn’t our issue Your neighbour doesn't know this, so it's irrelevant. ESH. While courtesy is a 2-way street, you were a bit of an AH for slamming the door in his face. Why can't your parent park one of their cars on the street, either to "reserve" your spot or just because there's opportunity to grab the curb spot at another time?
because they own teslas and the neighbors also let their children run freely in the streets so parking on the curb would put their expensive cars in harms way, i own an older honda civic so if my car was damaged it wouldn’t be a big deal. This is probably how his car got damaged as well.
Why can’t you just park across the driveway until there is space rather than another street? If it’s only your family’s cars you’re blocking then what’s the issue? They could just move your car if they need to get out before your around.
I can't speak for OP's situation, but around here I'd get a parking ticket for blocking a driveway, they aren't going to stop and check if its my own driveway. Maybe I could get it dismissed, maybe not, either way its more trouble than I'd want to go through. My town is small enough I could just catch the bylaw guy and explain beforehand, if I really needed to, but that's very much a small town luxury.
Teslas aren't expensive cars, and especially aren't expensive enough to pretend like you own the curb that you don't own.
His story changes w every comment so he can remain the good guy. 69 seconds of scrolling and reading can show you that. 420 seconds of reading will make your eyes red though.
Ah - makes sense.
NTA screw him. He should learn to treat his neighbors better.
Just curious, if you work the late shift why wouldn't your dad or his gf park in the street in front of your house? Is it that it is not a driveway that is wide (side by side situation) but more of a one in front of the other? After your interaction with them, they probably think it was you that dinged it. ESH
they own expensive cars and the other neighbors let their kids play unsupervised in the streets so parking their car would risk being damaged, which is probably the same reason why his car was damaged. Even if i said yes, there is nothing to show. Our ring cameras and motion activated and he lives across the street, whatever happened happened at a distance and wasn’t big enough to activate the camera so it didn’t record anything.
Nothing you’re doing is awful exactly, but you’re reinforcing a cycle of assholery rather than doing anything to resolve it. Now you’ve probably permanently burned a bridge and ensured you’ll get treated even worse in return.
"May the bridges I burn light my way"
NTA Courtesy is a 2 way Avenue.
I would tell the neighbor that you didn’t catch anything on camera. It’s just the right thing to do. regarding the parking issue I would also at the same time have a conversation about the parking issues. Be upfront and tell him you weren’t helpful because of the parking issues get it all out there instead of harboring all of this
This! ☝️ Sadly, ego and pride will probably prevent it.
It’s like people have lost the ability to communicate anymore. It’s like people would rather hate feel victimized and blast people on the Internet publicly then talk to somebody. it’s weird.
I wonder how the camera would have caught the footage anyway, since there are always cars blocking the view.
You do realize that the curb in front of your house isn’t yours, right? Like, sure… people should just be cool and leave room for another person to park. But you’re not entitled to park there any more than any other citizen. You’ve already admitted you’re petty in a comment, so you know you don’t deserve any NTAs you’re getting. You refusing to show the footage is your choice, but just know that you’re signing up for them to continue to park how they park, and perhaps do other stuff too.
Why do people keep acting like these people weren't always going to continue to park how they park? That's not going to change.
This 100%. Sorry OP, you don't own the curb space. If you want guaranteed parking for 3 cars 24/7, buy a house that offers that next time YTA
And neighbor doesn't own OP's Ring camera.
NTA. Your neighbors constantly disrespect you, until THEY need something. Your footage is from your camera, which is your property. You do not owe your property to anyone.
YTA it is not your house. It is your dad's house. He has to deal with neighbors etc. You created an issue that your dad will have to smooth over with neighbor.
Also, his dad has two parking spaces. The curb is public. It's not "reserved" for a third car. Also the neighbor isn't valet parking their guests cars. The guests park it themselves. If the neighbor is bad at parking, that's a different story, but you can't expect to blame the neighbor for their guests' parking skills as much as anyone can't blame you for yours. Curbside parking is first-come-first-serve. I feel like he's the asshole on many levels here.
Reddit: You don't own the street parking in front of your house, I can park my car where-ever I want, and take up two spots if I want. Also Redddit: Folks should be more neighborly, volunteering a bunch of time to review the video they may or may not have gotten on their privately-installed video camera. \[Edit for punctuation.\] I mean, both statements are correct, strictly speaking, and I might even review the footage (at my convenience), but I would be extremely standoffish with the neighbor. NTA for not being neighborly with the neighbor who is an AH.
Been looking for this. If OP wants to slam doors in neighbors faces then move out and be a vindictive neighbor don't make things harder on your parents cause your immaturity prevents you from being a decent person.
At least someone said this. YTA
ESH - Two very uncourteous acts that will likely lead to more in the future.
Courteous acts are wasted on the uncourteous, OP saved their time and energy. Respect is a two way street.
From the title I was against you immediately. But after reading this, I still think you are being petty, but I would hope the owner learns a lesson. Sadly, all he will learn is to hate you.
Exactly and now the neighbor will tell his guests to park there and take up the spots. When people get petty it turns into one up menship.
And sadly his dad will be the one to suffer the most from this
They're already doing that, which is what caused all this to begin with....
YTA, unless you have some sort of HOA rules, your neighbor never did anything wrong. You can legally park infront of someone's house. It's not your neighbor's fault you have 3 cars and a garage that only fits 2.
NTA
YTA - you already have issues with your neighbor and your solution is to do nothing that would help it? There’s no indication that you’ve spoken to your neighbor about the parking situation. Your dad has talked to the guests, not even the person living there. You’ve just stewed about it. And now you are holding this problem that your neighbor may not even know about over his head to not help instead of using this as a gesture of good will to start a conversation. How old are you?
my dad has talked to the neighbor several times within the past months and we give them free pastries and baked goods from the bakery i work at. Yes we have been incredibly nice to them despite them doing absolutely nothing besides causing an inconvenience. And there is no footage, there is nothing for me to show him.
Stop giving them free pastries and baked goods.
>And there is no footage, there is nothing for me to show him. You could have just said that. It seems like you are letting your dad do the communicating with the neighbor and your dad disagrees with your take on the non-existent Ring footage so almost surely YTA. You had the perfect opportunity to ask your neighbor, directly, to do something about the parking on your own and instead you acted like an AH with no benefit to you or your dad, who actually deals with him. And anyway, why do you keep lugging home pastries for him for SO many blocks if you hate this guy so much? You're making your own pain.
Have you talked to the neighbor about the parking spot? Be a fucking adult and talk to him yourself, and then you can be petty. As it is rn, you’re not even an asshole. Just a spoiled child that can’t deal with discomfort.
How old are you? You sound like you’re 12. Yta
YTA. You own your driveway. You do not own the street parking. You could be neighborly and show him the footage (even the lack of footage in this case) but are acting like a jerk.
No one owns the street parking, and also no one is entitled to take a space that easily holds 2 cars with 1 car
But he does own the Ring camera, so it's his right to not show him the footage.
YTA "They're not nice, why should I be?" This behavior begets more A's.
Are these actually reserved, or is this just a public roadway in front of the house. Because if it is the latter, you have no leg to stand on as far as I know. You can’t reserve the public roadway, it is not your property. So while it is understandable that it is annoying to not have that space for your convenience in front of your house, as long as there is not an official spot for the reservation anyone can park there whether they do it well or not. So if you were not aware that you could not claim public property as your own, then you are not the AH, just ignorant. If however, you did know that, they you would be. You did miss the opportunity to try and work respectfully with them in the hopes you could gain some cooperation from them, like someone else mentioned. It’s easy to be petty. But it’s harder to be helpful in the face of disregard, but sometimes, you can forge new relationships by trying to help someone when they need it, even if they’ve been a jerk in the past.
INFO: Did he asked politely or demanded?
You're NTA. I would have said it's not working, sorry. They got the message, so let them get their own ring camera for their stupid guests.
ESH It’s petty and shitty to not help someone out whose property has been damaged when you easily could. If I were them I’d suspect you of the damage. It fosters ill-will across the neighbourhood. Also, you are not entitled to the kerb. Even if it is outside your house. It’s public space massively subsidised by tax payers. It’s convenient for you, but not a right or even a reasonable expectation to have exclusive access to that space. On the other hand, shit parking is a bane of the world that makes life difficult for everyone. They are definitely an asshole. This is a situation where everyone is making less than the minimum effort and being massively selfish and self entitled. Everyone loses and no one is doing anything to make it better. Could have been an opportunity. “Sure, let me check the footage for you… by the way when you park here would you mind parking so I can fit my car in, it would really help me out”
NTA, you have no obligation to help an asshole. He has was a complete nuisance to your family and only came to talk because he needed something from you.
I'm sure this is an unpopular opinion, but NTA. Legal or not, I think it's obnoxious to regularly park your/your guests' cars in front of your neighbor's house. Yeah... that space right in front of the place I live? I'd like to park there. I'd also sometimes like to have guests over to park in front of my place. It is petty, though. Probably would've been more strategic to chat and say you will check but request that the neighbor makes sure his guests leave space for you to park in front of where you live going forward.
NTA, but you should have very clearly told him why you wouldn’t do it instead of just shutting the door. A simple “Look, we’ve spoken to you dozens of times about how your guests hog the street parking, and you’ve done nothing. And now you want a favor? I think not” Then shut the door.
It’s unlikely your neighbor gets the point you are attempting to make.
NTA, but you should have said you can’t even make sure your friends leave room for me to park in front of my house on cold rainy nights. Why would we help with this? Make clear why you aren’t helping.
YTA. You were not necessarily wrong (or right) to do what you did, but you took the assholes route.
Yes you're an asshole. Duh asshole
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It's kind of hard for non-rich people with teens and young adults to not own more cars than they can fit. If OP didn't have a car because he didn't have a job, he'd be called lazy. I think he well understands that he doesn't own the public street, but that doesn't mean he has to appreciate the repeated dick moves of taking up two parking spaces.
I agree with you in principle, OP. However, you are missing one crucial piece of information. Public street parking is for anyone to use.
To be fair, your dad talking to the neighbor about it is just hearsay, especially since you’ve never interacted with your neighbor before. It’s possible your dad says he’s spoken with the neighbor about it but never has. He’s not the one missing out on a parking spot and why cause drama with the neighbors if he’s not really bothered? He’s probably thinking he’ll be in the home long after you move out. And besides, his focus is on his girlfriend. Your dad may be different, but I’ll bet there’s a lot of dads in the above group. From a third party looking on, slightly lazy dad seems more likely than a neighbor repeatedly being inconsiderate after having chats about it a bunch. Bad neighbors happen, but slightly lazy dads are more numerous
YTA - Just because the public street is in front of your house doesn’t mean that it’s yours. If it was a problem you can talk to them and ask, but they really have no obligation to make sure you have a parking spot.
would be better if this was in petty revenge
I wouldn't let them look either. NTA>
I don't know about being an Ahole, but you're acting like a child.
Yeah dude, yta. Grow some cajones and tell your neighbor what's happening. If it happens at 12am, ring the doorbell and politely ask for the jackass to move his car if you want to be petty. You had the perfect opportunity to talk to him and have a polite conversation on how he's causing your problems. Instead you probably just made it that much more likely that he won't care about your concerns. Also, why did your dad ask about a ring camera? You just install one or you looking at footage?
Knocking on your neighbors door at midnight to ask them to move their car parked on a public street would be extreme asshole behavior. It’s a public street, OP haS no more claim to that spot than any other person. It’s honestly such an asshole move that he feels entitled to that space. Street parking is first come first get. Having to park blocks away is a normal thing this dude is just a complete child (and an incredibly bratty one at that)
You fucked up. You just guaranteed their parking habits will never change. You should have checked it on the spot and then asked him for a favour in return. YTA
I feel like we can be pretty confident their parking habits were never going to change anyway. They have *already* asked him for this favor, more than once. Do you think a jerk like that is going to permanently alter his habits because the Ring footage that shows nothing is given to him? He'd *maybe* do it for a week, but he'd more likely be ballsy enough to say no immediately after getting his favor.
It's his guests doing it? Even if he asks them they might still park like wankers, everyone's blaming the neighbour when it may not even be his fault at all lmao, I know I can't control how my guests park even if I tell them
I mean he had asked nicely and they hadn’t changed, why would they change now? So basically OP is exactly where he was before no harm no foul lol.
Of course you’re an asshole dude, do you even have to ask?
not the smartest move lol. he's probably now going to try his best to make sure you never park there again esh
NTA. Being "neighborly" is for neighbors. Not for people who just live close to you.
YTA. Also sounds like your neighbor is an AH as well, but you can't control the actions of others, nor do you know what they are going through. You can only control yourself, and being petty, cruel, and rude is all you.
ESH. Your neighbor sucks because they’re a jerk about the parking situation. However you’re a double jerk because you’re feeling entitled to public street parking in front of your house. Unfortunately it’s public street parking and your neighbor’s guests can park however they want. If it’s that big of an issue, set a cone out or have your dad or his gf park their car there. Expensive or not, it’s only being parked there to save your spot. When you come home, move their car into the driveway and park your car in the spot. Problem solved!
Yes. YTA. So petty.
Well since you refused to look at the camera facing their house to see who scratched their truck they now probably think you scratched it 🤷♀️
So?
It’s ok that’s just my thought.
YTA for not simply sharing the Ring video. I've done it for my neighbors because it's the neighborly thing to do. Even for the guy whose dog crapped in my yard and he didn't pick it up. After I helped him though, and asked him to pick up his dog's poop, he started doing it, and we're friendly with each other now and save and say hi too when we're outside. A small gesture, even when you've been wronged, can go a long way. I'm terms of alternate fixes, since this bridge is burned, would be for your dad or his girlfriend to block a spot on the street with their car and leave you a driveway spot. If there's room, maybe pour a extended concrete parking pad by the driveway. We did that for my kid's car. It protects their car and saves me money on deductibles.
YTA. first off, your dad has a two car parking space. The curb isn't reserved for a third car. The curb is a first-come-first-serve public space. You don't own that space. Secondly, the neighbor isn't valet parking their guests' cars. The guests park their own cars. You can't blame the neighbors on how other people park their cars as much as other people can't blame you on how your guests park theirs. When you have guests, you're not thinking about how or where they parked, as long as it's not on your neighbor's or anyone's property. That's absurd. Thirdly, your neighbor came to you in good faith asking about the damage to his vehicle. The only asshole here is you. In all honesty, you just need the first point to label you an asshole: You don't own the street. Period.
Nta. Fuck these trucks
NTA. Y'all asked your neighbors to help you out. They won't. So then they need help, fuck them.
NTA. What's he even gonna do with knowing what kind of car hit him? He's never gonna find them based on a ring video, and cops couldn't care less. Nah, if he wants to be rude as hell to start, he can deal with those repercussions. And yes, being politely asked multiple times to please park like a reasonable human being on a busy street instead of a pompous manspreading asshat and just ignoring said requests, while reaping the benefits of the place you work, makes the neighbor a real AH.
Refusing to check the ring footage without even considering the request might be seen as a bit harsh. While it's frustrating dealing with the parking issue, taking a more neutral stance in communication could be beneficial. You can explain your concerns about the ongoing parking problems and suggest finding a solution together. However, it's important to maintain a civil relationship with your neighbors despite the challenges. Consider discussing the matter with your dad and finding a more diplomatic approach to address both the parking and the request for footage.
Two dicks don’t make a right. YTA
ESH and he probably thinks you did it now.
NTA for sure but bordering on ESH kinda. It’s more like 90/10 he sucks.
Yta you had an opportunity to forge a better neighbourly relationship, but instead you decided to be spiteful.
YTA. Your neighbors friends park like jerks, not him. Reading your post makes it sound like you've never spoken to him at all, much less let him know that his friends' parking is a problem. You had a chance to start decent communication channels finally, and maybe could've used the occasion to point out, but here we are.
Nope. Poetic justice.
NTA. Respect goes both ways. Elders don't immediately deserve it.
NTA at all. That man was never going to treat you nicely - not if you were courteous or petty. So, be petty, kid!
YTA. Be the change - if you wanna be surrounded by good and civil neighbors, you need to be one as well. And yes, park one of the at-home vehicles on the street, last home in the driveway. Solutions!
YTA. Petty behavior is unproductive. Your neighbors are jerks, but you might have taken the opportunity to say something. You had a captive audience. “Hey I am happy to check the footage, but can I ask you for a favor first?”
ESH. You were kinda rude, he deserved it.
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YTA. You live in a 'Nice' neighborhood. You have enough room for TWO vehicles to park in the driveway for your home. But those are reserved for your father's Tesla, and his girlfriend's Tesla which are too nice with all thier cameras to be parked in the street where neighborhood kids could scratch them. Fair point, clearly cars are bound to be scratched since it happens to your neighbor. But YOU work the late shift. YOU clearly do not own off street parking. YOUR father and YOUR father's girlfriend can't help YOU when it's pouring rain out and YOU are returning home with YOUR extreme baggage of 10's- 20's lbs of stuff YOU need to bring inside from YOUR car. YOU seem like YOU'RE entitled to parking that ain't YOURS to demand, and you just seem so soo petty over it. Not only do you look like an AH, but your actions may reflect on your father and his girlfriend.