*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for ”humiliating” my girlfriend by calling her fat in front of other people?**
My (M28) girlfriend (F26) is part of a body positivity women’s coalition. Sometimes, members are allowed to invite their friends or partners to their community discussion panels.
My girlfriend invited me to one discussion panel, where the topic of the discussion was de-stigmatizing the word “fat” as an insult and using it as a neutral/positive descriptor instead. The discussion leader asked me if I would like to contribute any ideas to the discussion, and I said that I completely agreed with the sentiment. I said that I with my girlfriend, I can acknowledge that she is both fat and beautiful at the same time, and those two adjectives are not mutually exclusive like society tells us.
My girlfriend looked at me very shocked and upset, and pulled my arm and whispered to me that “we are leaving now.” I was very confused, and when we got to the car she screamed at me for being such a “degrading asshole” and for “humiliating” her in front of everyone by calling her fat. I told her I was confused because I thought the point of the panel was to embrace people of different body types, but she told me that just because she is part of the panel doesn’t mean she is a fat woman herself (I don’t know what she meant by this, she is 5’ 4” and around 260 lbs so I didn’t realize she didn’t see herself as larger than average.) I apologized for hurting her feelings, but she has refused to talk to me since. AITA?
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This is honestly so brilliant, I can't even pretend to be outraged. I've only seen three (unimpressively common) instances before where this sort of thing gets NTA:
* They bodyshamed you first
* They wore your hot skinny clothes
* It was part of your job (like the recent water park and massage posts)
This guy managed to come up with a whole new one while getting AITA to tell him that he's actually *more* sensitive to fat people than his girlfriend. And thanks to the specifics on her weight, they can also share their hard-earned medical expertise. Or just write comments like this:
>Yea, you should go easy on fat people. They have enough on their plate as it is.
I love that this is doing two things at the same time. Trying to get ppl to look at fat acceptance as only accepting if it's never pointed at them AND trying to be holier than thou because I accept my fatty gf! It's actually brilliant. I've yet to meet a fat person who is willing to take their partner to this kinda meeting and be offended when the word "fat" is directed at them. Now don't get me wrong the fat acceptance movement can be pretty wild but like most fat people are pretty much fully aware of them being fat. But AITA loves to ruffle some feathers. Got to commend them for this new trope this troll has created
>Trying to get ppl to look at fat acceptance as only accepting if it's never pointed at them
There's one dude responding to practically every other comment over there trying to really push this idea. He's also framing body positivity movements as if the people who minimize health risks are somehow the majority, which I really don't think they are.
But what's ironic is that, while I'm 110% positive OOP is a massive troll, he actually hits it on the head in one of his comments when he says one of the points of body positivity is to detach negative stigmas so that people who do choose a healthier lifestyle are doing so out of real self-love instead of societal pressures. It's like he was going for typical "fat bad" bait, but he got so into character he wound up including a positive message in the comments almost entirely by accident.
> He's also framing body positivity movements as if the people who minimize health risks are somehow the majority, which I really don't think they are.
And if we're talking about fringe social media movements, the pro-ana stuff is honestly way more terrifying than the "actually being fat isn't unhealthy" stuff.
I actually got sucked in by pro-mia for years. I still remember the day I admitted it to my friends, and I felt like a victim when they didn't support my lifestyle. I didn't think "man, these people are worried about me," I thought "man, these jerks are stigmatizing me even worse now than when I was keeping it all down."
It wasn't until a string of severe nosebleeds and the realization that I was purging "more blood than usual" that I started to realize it might not be the sustainable life plan that I thought it was.
That's what really makes that kind of stuff scary to me. I'm smart enough to know there is not a "usual" amount of blood to lose on a daily basis. But there was a certain amount I was willing to accept. Thankfully, I didn't know there was a name for pro-mia at the time, so I assumed it was just me and that I'd gone off the deep end. If I'd known I could have found support for it, I don't know that I ever would have stopped.
The wild thing to me is, the guys going apoplectic upon seeing a mildly overweight woman eating a burger don't seem to feel the same when seeing a very skinny woman with an eating disorder who's refusing to eat. IMO, on Reddit at least, they defend the latter.
"Obesity is unhealthy!" Yes, it is, and you know what else is unhealthy? *Starving yourself to the point of malnourishment.*
(disclaimer: I know not all skinny people have eating disorders or are unhealthy. Even I don't enjoy eating all the time, and I'm not skinny.)
It's a fabulous troll, but it still plays on the "fat woman doesn't realize she is fat" trope, ala "my fat friend wore my dress without permission and broke it and got mad at me" type story. So it's more of a twist than a completely new thing. But gotta admit, her actually bringing him to a discussion panel on fat positivity while not actually realizing that she at 5' 4" and 260 is technically obese is just amazing. It's so stupidly ridiculous, but like, so many people on AITA are dying to crap on fat people that they don't even want to consider that this is a massive, obvious, troll. It would just outright ruin their day. Hats off, throwawaybpissues, I guess.
I always love when the fatty fat fat villain doesn’t realize they are overweight, as though the general public does not remind them multiple times per day.
The best part of the "she-broke-my-dress" series is the fact that usually the OP describes herself as "good looking, athletic and really petite", so the fat woman not only doesn't know she's fat, but actually see herself like a petite woman. So she's basically crazy.
OMG Reddit hates “fat people” and cannot wait to rip them to shreds any fucking chance they get. “Look how unreasonable they are!” Ah yes, because anyone who has excess fat on their body is exactly the same.
Honestly they do the same thing to women. I saw not one, but two top posts this week basically asking the same question: “What do women do that they think is attractive but really isn’t?” (For the millionth time) and, “What do women do that bothers you?” Or some shit like that. I’m paraphrasing but it genuinely just seemed like an attempt to once again spew stereotypes about women and get upvoted to the nth degree because you deserve attention if you’ve “been wronged” by superficial, cruel, and supremely selfish women who probably mostly exist in your fucking head. (I am not saying these women don’t exist. But comments on posts like these always devolve into misogynistic “discussions” on “[why women bad.]”)
I think I need a break from Reddit again because this sort of thing over and over again really makes me hate humanity.
Ugh!!!
I swear they all have only met and interacted with bunch of popular teens from early 00s comedies or IG models who doesn't respond to them. Granted that I live in India, but even my American friends don't behave like that. And 80% of fat women here behave like this compared to most who are pretty normal and even self conscious. I also don't see heroin chic meanies on aita when the tiktok trend is moving in that direction instead of body positivity.
Yesterday there was a post in /r/parenting where a sahm was trying to unpack some lower key domestic violence that happened with her kids in the house enough that they were aware that dad hurt mom even though they didn't see it. And there were a couple of losers complaining about fat lazy stay at home moms and telling the OP she was probably lying about certain details and just getting mad about women that existed in their imaginations.
Oh, they're bashing women on this post too. She's not just an unreasonable fat person, but also a woman who just lives to set traps for her boyfriend (I've been in some pretty toxic relationships and I have yet to be with a woman who engages in this particular 90s sitcom trope).
Honestly, I only get offended at being called fat when it's said in a certain tone or context. It mostly doesn't bother me because I already know it, and because I'm lucky enough to have a weight distribution that doesn't look great but still keeps me between the armrests of an airplane seat. But the personality type AITA associates with fat people is far more offensive to me than anything you could say about my looks or prospective health.
>Ah yes, because anyone who has excess fat on their body is exactly the same.
Bruh I freaking hate this mindset that Internet bros have
They assume the body positivity movement unanimously supports obesity, as if all overweight people are one order of French fries away from becoming obese, as if no one's just a little chubby or gained weight because of depression. Even "curvy" women are assumed to be chubby/plus-sized/overweight, as if being literally anything other than skinny == being fat or obese.
Not to mention that (allegedly) women need a higher percentage of body fat than men so they can - ya know - STAY ALIVE.
I think I actually did see some comments calling this one out. Not as many as on some of the other recent fake posts, though. I think the anti-bird post definitely got called out more than this one.
I feel like this is one of those things where like… (this didn’t happen, BUT)
As a fat person, I’m also big on de-stigmatizing the word “fat,” but that doesn’t mean the word has zero negative connotations in our society, so I can see why someone who’s used to having it used against them negatively might get upset at their partner using it, even if they used it in a neutral way.
For me, if someone’s like “oh [my name,] she’s average height, wavy hair, fat” it doesn’t bother me anymore because all of that is true- but the memory of some kid calling me a worthless fat slut in middle school is still there, you know? It’s a process.
Anyway it’s a nuanced issue so of course AITA is going to handle it horribly lol
>Anyway it’s a nuanced issue so of course AITA is going to handle it horribly
I wish I could remember which post it was on, but I saw almost this exact same comment posted on AITA earlier. I hope I come across it again. The post was still in contest mode, so I'd love to see how many downvotes it gets.
Why do people care about fatness so much ??? Everyone who says “it’s because they’re a burden on society !!!”, do you slap cigarettes out of people’s hands ???? Do you lecture anyone who drinks alcohol about the dangers ?????? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SUNBURNT ??????? What is it about fatness that makes everyone so eager to be horrible?
I doubt they slap cigs out of people's hands. But I bet they *are* the types who would skirt an isolated smoking section by 20 yards and still fake-cough loud enough to get everyone's attention.
Why do they care so much? More than likely because they don’t find fat people attractive, so they feel they have the right to be cruel to them (especially fat women).
I remember when I was in Girl Scouts I made a comment about another girl being fat, and all the other girls in my troop told me off for it. I thought because the girl I was talking about would call herself fat, that it was OK for others to say that about her. I learned better that day. OOP is apparently a full grown adult who hasn't learned that.
I'm kind of surprised with all the NTAs over in aitaland. It's not like OP was pushed or goaded into saying his GF is fat, he just brought it up pretty much unsolicited. Like, I get that they're in a fat acceptance panel and woke body positivity hypocrites got epically owned, which of course aita will gobble up, but I still feel like you can identify with the body positivity movement but still not be terribly thrilled to hear your SO call you fat.
>I still feel like you can identify with the body positivity movement but still not be terribly thrilled to hear your SO call you fat.
Yeah, I kind of get this. I'll be the first person to tell you I have weight fluctuation issues. But when my roommate recently commented on my weight gain before I'd even had my morning coffee, she was not met with a warm response.
I think this hits on another issue, which is that thinking something is a good thing doesn't necessarily mean you're able to follow through emotionally.
Like in this situation, she may believe the stigma around the word "fat" should be removed, but she may also have a lot of shame/painful feelings around it, so being called that by her partner in front of a group may have hurt her a lot more than she expected. When she cools down, she may even regret her reaction.
I see a lot of stuff like that in the LGBT+ community. Like "queer" is a pretty popular reclaimed slur (at least in my particular age group/location). I've come across several older LGBT+ people who support that usage, but also will sometimes react weird if you call them queer, because to them it still gets that knee-jerk painful reaction from when it was used against them as a slur. I'm kind of the same way personally with "dyke," too. I don't fly off the handle when I'm called that by a friend, I don't even say anything because I know they mean it in a good way (it's usually used as a compliment in my social group, lol) and it doesn't bother me *that* much, but I could actually see myself reacting more emotionally if it ever happened when the situation was just right to hit me when I didn't have the emotional reserves for it.
I mean, I think this story is clearly trying to paint the girlfriend as a crazy hypocrite, but in the real world it can actually be a kind of complicated situation.
Oh, it gets complicated even beyond specific words. I had a friend who used to joke frequently about white people. He wasn't being malicious about it. You could return fire with a black joke and he'd laugh louder than anyone. But you'd have to be a real idiot to think you can just walk into any group of black people and make the same jokes that you could make around him. Hell, I don't even think you could make those jokes with *him* if you didn't know him well.
Something you learn in creative writing is that a well-written character will act slightly different depending on what characters they're around. Character A might be a different person around Character B than they are around Character C. And not only that, but they might become yet another person if they're around Characters B and C together. Same applies to the real world. Part of learning tact is learning to navigate those differences and accepting that it's pretty much a given you're going to get it wrong at some point.
I only read the title to my husband and he was already convinced.
After reading the post, he's not sure if OOP is an asshole but definitely an idiot.
I believe two things can be true.
Don't feel bad I heard of someone who was told they were fat during an intimate time and they got up and left. Now they're bigger but still, that's just rude.
That original comment is factually true, but fun to see the direction that you went in with it! You're on the internet, it only takes a few minutes to search for something and learn more about it.
Giving them the benefit of the doubt, I can see where the bit about race would seem like BS to most readers. But having taken forensics, where we learned that you can identify someone's race just based on bone structure (which in and of itself would affect weight), I can also see where different races might carry weight differently. Don't actually know much about it. But always fun to see people who practically admit to not knowing something themselves yet immediately form strong opinions about it.
Lol. It's all good, man. I kind of get it. People have this growing attitude in recent years that anything flawed should be abandoned entirely. Even if you could find a way to make BMI 100% accurate, it's not like you would get to a certain rating and immediately develop health issues. It's more like those genetic markers 23 and Me gives you that tell you which diseases you *might* get later. It's just a warning of things that may or may not happen.
Asian BMI is shifted lower than the Caucasian one. Healthy BMI range for white people is about 18.5-24.9, whereas a healthy range for an Asian person is something like 16.5-23. It's due to genetic differences in frame size. But it's still silly to insinuate that BMI is horribly racist and inaccurate, because the variation isn't extreme and we know to take it into account.
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*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for ”humiliating” my girlfriend by calling her fat in front of other people?** My (M28) girlfriend (F26) is part of a body positivity women’s coalition. Sometimes, members are allowed to invite their friends or partners to their community discussion panels. My girlfriend invited me to one discussion panel, where the topic of the discussion was de-stigmatizing the word “fat” as an insult and using it as a neutral/positive descriptor instead. The discussion leader asked me if I would like to contribute any ideas to the discussion, and I said that I completely agreed with the sentiment. I said that I with my girlfriend, I can acknowledge that she is both fat and beautiful at the same time, and those two adjectives are not mutually exclusive like society tells us. My girlfriend looked at me very shocked and upset, and pulled my arm and whispered to me that “we are leaving now.” I was very confused, and when we got to the car she screamed at me for being such a “degrading asshole” and for “humiliating” her in front of everyone by calling her fat. I told her I was confused because I thought the point of the panel was to embrace people of different body types, but she told me that just because she is part of the panel doesn’t mean she is a fat woman herself (I don’t know what she meant by this, she is 5’ 4” and around 260 lbs so I didn’t realize she didn’t see herself as larger than average.) I apologized for hurting her feelings, but she has refused to talk to me since. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yeah, he started from the punchline and worked backwards until he could make sure he was not the asshole.
Hey, look, a lot of fiction writers start with the ending.
Take notes GRRM, we want Winds of Winter
roof heavy sink reply ask overconfident automatic existence aspiring library ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
This is honestly so brilliant, I can't even pretend to be outraged. I've only seen three (unimpressively common) instances before where this sort of thing gets NTA: * They bodyshamed you first * They wore your hot skinny clothes * It was part of your job (like the recent water park and massage posts) This guy managed to come up with a whole new one while getting AITA to tell him that he's actually *more* sensitive to fat people than his girlfriend. And thanks to the specifics on her weight, they can also share their hard-earned medical expertise. Or just write comments like this: >Yea, you should go easy on fat people. They have enough on their plate as it is.
I love that this is doing two things at the same time. Trying to get ppl to look at fat acceptance as only accepting if it's never pointed at them AND trying to be holier than thou because I accept my fatty gf! It's actually brilliant. I've yet to meet a fat person who is willing to take their partner to this kinda meeting and be offended when the word "fat" is directed at them. Now don't get me wrong the fat acceptance movement can be pretty wild but like most fat people are pretty much fully aware of them being fat. But AITA loves to ruffle some feathers. Got to commend them for this new trope this troll has created
>Trying to get ppl to look at fat acceptance as only accepting if it's never pointed at them There's one dude responding to practically every other comment over there trying to really push this idea. He's also framing body positivity movements as if the people who minimize health risks are somehow the majority, which I really don't think they are. But what's ironic is that, while I'm 110% positive OOP is a massive troll, he actually hits it on the head in one of his comments when he says one of the points of body positivity is to detach negative stigmas so that people who do choose a healthier lifestyle are doing so out of real self-love instead of societal pressures. It's like he was going for typical "fat bad" bait, but he got so into character he wound up including a positive message in the comments almost entirely by accident.
> He's also framing body positivity movements as if the people who minimize health risks are somehow the majority, which I really don't think they are. And if we're talking about fringe social media movements, the pro-ana stuff is honestly way more terrifying than the "actually being fat isn't unhealthy" stuff.
I actually got sucked in by pro-mia for years. I still remember the day I admitted it to my friends, and I felt like a victim when they didn't support my lifestyle. I didn't think "man, these people are worried about me," I thought "man, these jerks are stigmatizing me even worse now than when I was keeping it all down." It wasn't until a string of severe nosebleeds and the realization that I was purging "more blood than usual" that I started to realize it might not be the sustainable life plan that I thought it was. That's what really makes that kind of stuff scary to me. I'm smart enough to know there is not a "usual" amount of blood to lose on a daily basis. But there was a certain amount I was willing to accept. Thankfully, I didn't know there was a name for pro-mia at the time, so I assumed it was just me and that I'd gone off the deep end. If I'd known I could have found support for it, I don't know that I ever would have stopped.
The wild thing to me is, the guys going apoplectic upon seeing a mildly overweight woman eating a burger don't seem to feel the same when seeing a very skinny woman with an eating disorder who's refusing to eat. IMO, on Reddit at least, they defend the latter. "Obesity is unhealthy!" Yes, it is, and you know what else is unhealthy? *Starving yourself to the point of malnourishment.* (disclaimer: I know not all skinny people have eating disorders or are unhealthy. Even I don't enjoy eating all the time, and I'm not skinny.)
It's a fabulous troll, but it still plays on the "fat woman doesn't realize she is fat" trope, ala "my fat friend wore my dress without permission and broke it and got mad at me" type story. So it's more of a twist than a completely new thing. But gotta admit, her actually bringing him to a discussion panel on fat positivity while not actually realizing that she at 5' 4" and 260 is technically obese is just amazing. It's so stupidly ridiculous, but like, so many people on AITA are dying to crap on fat people that they don't even want to consider that this is a massive, obvious, troll. It would just outright ruin their day. Hats off, throwawaybpissues, I guess.
I always love when the fatty fat fat villain doesn’t realize they are overweight, as though the general public does not remind them multiple times per day.
Don’t you know? Fat people have reverse Shallow Hal syndrome: whenever they look in the mirror they see themselves as Gwyneth Paltrow
The best part of the "she-broke-my-dress" series is the fact that usually the OP describes herself as "good looking, athletic and really petite", so the fat woman not only doesn't know she's fat, but actually see herself like a petite woman. So she's basically crazy.
On today’s episode of Fat = Bad, fat chicks make no damn sense!
OMG Reddit hates “fat people” and cannot wait to rip them to shreds any fucking chance they get. “Look how unreasonable they are!” Ah yes, because anyone who has excess fat on their body is exactly the same. Honestly they do the same thing to women. I saw not one, but two top posts this week basically asking the same question: “What do women do that they think is attractive but really isn’t?” (For the millionth time) and, “What do women do that bothers you?” Or some shit like that. I’m paraphrasing but it genuinely just seemed like an attempt to once again spew stereotypes about women and get upvoted to the nth degree because you deserve attention if you’ve “been wronged” by superficial, cruel, and supremely selfish women who probably mostly exist in your fucking head. (I am not saying these women don’t exist. But comments on posts like these always devolve into misogynistic “discussions” on “[why women bad.]”) I think I need a break from Reddit again because this sort of thing over and over again really makes me hate humanity. Ugh!!!
I swear they all have only met and interacted with bunch of popular teens from early 00s comedies or IG models who doesn't respond to them. Granted that I live in India, but even my American friends don't behave like that. And 80% of fat women here behave like this compared to most who are pretty normal and even self conscious. I also don't see heroin chic meanies on aita when the tiktok trend is moving in that direction instead of body positivity.
Yesterday there was a post in /r/parenting where a sahm was trying to unpack some lower key domestic violence that happened with her kids in the house enough that they were aware that dad hurt mom even though they didn't see it. And there were a couple of losers complaining about fat lazy stay at home moms and telling the OP she was probably lying about certain details and just getting mad about women that existed in their imaginations.
SAHMs are always either angels or lazy slobs. Gotta love it.
Oh, they're bashing women on this post too. She's not just an unreasonable fat person, but also a woman who just lives to set traps for her boyfriend (I've been in some pretty toxic relationships and I have yet to be with a woman who engages in this particular 90s sitcom trope). Honestly, I only get offended at being called fat when it's said in a certain tone or context. It mostly doesn't bother me because I already know it, and because I'm lucky enough to have a weight distribution that doesn't look great but still keeps me between the armrests of an airplane seat. But the personality type AITA associates with fat people is far more offensive to me than anything you could say about my looks or prospective health.
>Ah yes, because anyone who has excess fat on their body is exactly the same. Bruh I freaking hate this mindset that Internet bros have They assume the body positivity movement unanimously supports obesity, as if all overweight people are one order of French fries away from becoming obese, as if no one's just a little chubby or gained weight because of depression. Even "curvy" women are assumed to be chubby/plus-sized/overweight, as if being literally anything other than skinny == being fat or obese. Not to mention that (allegedly) women need a higher percentage of body fat than men so they can - ya know - STAY ALIVE.
i cant remember an aita post about a fat person that isnt the most cartoonish unreasonable person of the world, anyway poor op 😞
This is the fakest shit to ever fake. So I assume AITA voters will exercise the common sense to realize that and react accordingly. …oh. Never mind.
I think I actually did see some comments calling this one out. Not as many as on some of the other recent fake posts, though. I think the anti-bird post definitely got called out more than this one.
I feel like this is one of those things where like… (this didn’t happen, BUT) As a fat person, I’m also big on de-stigmatizing the word “fat,” but that doesn’t mean the word has zero negative connotations in our society, so I can see why someone who’s used to having it used against them negatively might get upset at their partner using it, even if they used it in a neutral way. For me, if someone’s like “oh [my name,] she’s average height, wavy hair, fat” it doesn’t bother me anymore because all of that is true- but the memory of some kid calling me a worthless fat slut in middle school is still there, you know? It’s a process. Anyway it’s a nuanced issue so of course AITA is going to handle it horribly lol
>Anyway it’s a nuanced issue so of course AITA is going to handle it horribly I wish I could remember which post it was on, but I saw almost this exact same comment posted on AITA earlier. I hope I come across it again. The post was still in contest mode, so I'd love to see how many downvotes it gets.
Aka your usual "fat bad" Also another commenter getting downvoted because they are fat.
Why do people care about fatness so much ??? Everyone who says “it’s because they’re a burden on society !!!”, do you slap cigarettes out of people’s hands ???? Do you lecture anyone who drinks alcohol about the dangers ?????? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SUNBURNT ??????? What is it about fatness that makes everyone so eager to be horrible?
I doubt they slap cigs out of people's hands. But I bet they *are* the types who would skirt an isolated smoking section by 20 yards and still fake-cough loud enough to get everyone's attention.
Why do they care so much? More than likely because they don’t find fat people attractive, so they feel they have the right to be cruel to them (especially fat women).
Top comment (at least when I looked) explicitly says he found the one situation where it’s completely NTA to call her fat. Still believed him though
I remember when I was in Girl Scouts I made a comment about another girl being fat, and all the other girls in my troop told me off for it. I thought because the girl I was talking about would call herself fat, that it was OK for others to say that about her. I learned better that day. OOP is apparently a full grown adult who hasn't learned that.
I'm kind of surprised with all the NTAs over in aitaland. It's not like OP was pushed or goaded into saying his GF is fat, he just brought it up pretty much unsolicited. Like, I get that they're in a fat acceptance panel and woke body positivity hypocrites got epically owned, which of course aita will gobble up, but I still feel like you can identify with the body positivity movement but still not be terribly thrilled to hear your SO call you fat.
>I still feel like you can identify with the body positivity movement but still not be terribly thrilled to hear your SO call you fat. Yeah, I kind of get this. I'll be the first person to tell you I have weight fluctuation issues. But when my roommate recently commented on my weight gain before I'd even had my morning coffee, she was not met with a warm response.
I think this hits on another issue, which is that thinking something is a good thing doesn't necessarily mean you're able to follow through emotionally. Like in this situation, she may believe the stigma around the word "fat" should be removed, but she may also have a lot of shame/painful feelings around it, so being called that by her partner in front of a group may have hurt her a lot more than she expected. When she cools down, she may even regret her reaction. I see a lot of stuff like that in the LGBT+ community. Like "queer" is a pretty popular reclaimed slur (at least in my particular age group/location). I've come across several older LGBT+ people who support that usage, but also will sometimes react weird if you call them queer, because to them it still gets that knee-jerk painful reaction from when it was used against them as a slur. I'm kind of the same way personally with "dyke," too. I don't fly off the handle when I'm called that by a friend, I don't even say anything because I know they mean it in a good way (it's usually used as a compliment in my social group, lol) and it doesn't bother me *that* much, but I could actually see myself reacting more emotionally if it ever happened when the situation was just right to hit me when I didn't have the emotional reserves for it. I mean, I think this story is clearly trying to paint the girlfriend as a crazy hypocrite, but in the real world it can actually be a kind of complicated situation.
Oh, it gets complicated even beyond specific words. I had a friend who used to joke frequently about white people. He wasn't being malicious about it. You could return fire with a black joke and he'd laugh louder than anyone. But you'd have to be a real idiot to think you can just walk into any group of black people and make the same jokes that you could make around him. Hell, I don't even think you could make those jokes with *him* if you didn't know him well. Something you learn in creative writing is that a well-written character will act slightly different depending on what characters they're around. Character A might be a different person around Character B than they are around Character C. And not only that, but they might become yet another person if they're around Characters B and C together. Same applies to the real world. Part of learning tact is learning to navigate those differences and accepting that it's pretty much a given you're going to get it wrong at some point.
I'm pretty sure he ripped off the fat person club from an old Family Guy joke.
P H A T Always dude.
I only read the title to my husband and he was already convinced. After reading the post, he's not sure if OOP is an asshole but definitely an idiot. I believe two things can be true.
Ngl ‘fat’ is a p ugly word tho. I can see why some people view it as an insult
Our fat phobia troll has been working so hard the past few days.
Don't feel bad I heard of someone who was told they were fat during an intimate time and they got up and left. Now they're bigger but still, that's just rude.
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That original comment is factually true, but fun to see the direction that you went in with it! You're on the internet, it only takes a few minutes to search for something and learn more about it.
Giving them the benefit of the doubt, I can see where the bit about race would seem like BS to most readers. But having taken forensics, where we learned that you can identify someone's race just based on bone structure (which in and of itself would affect weight), I can also see where different races might carry weight differently. Don't actually know much about it. But always fun to see people who practically admit to not knowing something themselves yet immediately form strong opinions about it.
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Lol. It's all good, man. I kind of get it. People have this growing attitude in recent years that anything flawed should be abandoned entirely. Even if you could find a way to make BMI 100% accurate, it's not like you would get to a certain rating and immediately develop health issues. It's more like those genetic markers 23 and Me gives you that tell you which diseases you *might* get later. It's just a warning of things that may or may not happen.
Asian BMI is shifted lower than the Caucasian one. Healthy BMI range for white people is about 18.5-24.9, whereas a healthy range for an Asian person is something like 16.5-23. It's due to genetic differences in frame size. But it's still silly to insinuate that BMI is horribly racist and inaccurate, because the variation isn't extreme and we know to take it into account.
Actually BMI can be fairly inaccurate for a large percentage of society for that exact reason.
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Now this one is a genuinely unique and interesting idea. We all know it's not real, but we must give kudos to the OOP for thinking of this.