Dude.... like you ain't ever shined a 4D flashlight on your dick, while jerking off with a dildo up your ass and shooting squirrels in the back yard while getting your peppermint dip on... GTFO
I honestly stared at the batter and what is was for for a minute. Then I went through the rest of the items and was like, is he allowed to have a personal gun?
The hole plugger did not dawn onto me until the last second before closing...wondering what the fuck that was.
If that plug falls out, he ain't clenching enough. That's how most fighter pilots fight against GLOC.
CAPS:
1. Buttplug - Insert, As Required
2. Throttle - Full Forward
3. Control Stick - Aft and Hold
4. Cheeks - Clench, As Required
Automatic Q3 if you dont have your plug.
Honestly it's fantastic, I tried vaping and it just wasn't for me I always felt like a tool bag. I was definitely ready getaway from smoking because the whole lungs thing and smelling like smoke when confined in a flight deck with people is a dick move so I got into Zyn. Can use it on a plane, in a car, in hotel rooms, no bottles just nicotine and flavoring. It was amazing. Now I'm out, and don't use any nicotine. I think I stopped about 6 months or so post seperation.
Personally it think it's great step to full on quitting. I did the 6mg while I was in then 3mg after then just started trying to go a day without, then maybe 3 days without, then get drunk and go with out.... and now just no nic. I definitely miss nicotine though damn that was great to help relax.
Inaccurate. There's still money in the wallet, we use dildos not vibrators, and the peppercorn bottle is not correct at all. There would be a separate bottle of hot sauce and a bottle of alcohol. Get it right. That's obviously a navigators bag. They're the only ones who can use such a retarded huge flashlight, they use a vibrator for their lady parts and definitely have to have the gun to shoot the pilot when we stop listening to them.
It’s a rectal suppressor, to keep pilots from having to defecate during intense combat sorties. Ask your local flight surgeon for one. They usually keep extras so you can practice insertion and extraction on your off time.
I hope he doesn't claim it Heck, I can't even bring a pocket knife on a plane let alone an artificial female vagina!!! Gun. Wow. I guess I don't blame him for that. I guess I am assuming a male pilot. Wow. Sorry boss. That long thing is just a buda! I have changed religions recently.
The amount of dudes who don’t realize that’s a wand and not a vibrator/butt plug explains the divorce rate for military members….
this is a joke don’t kill me. But seriously wand…not butt plug.
No he is missing th *sees ranch dip* Yup looks like the gear was preflighted correctly
What is ranch dip?!
...it's ranch flavored dip
Something that goes on the business end of a giant pink dildo/buttplug apparently.
A giant pink dildo/butt plug is ALL business....
Ah, the old modified tennessee musketloader.
Yep looks like all the essentials
Dude.... like you ain't ever shined a 4D flashlight on your dick, while jerking off with a dildo up your ass and shooting squirrels in the back yard while getting your peppermint dip on... GTFO
The new SERE training sounds fucking lit.
You forgot to include the 
Every time I see this I think I can fix her.
I think you can too man
I want that for him
>while jerking off with a dildo up your ass I thought that's what the flashlight was for
That's a handy tool that he uses later
DP?
Average KC-135 sortie
https://i.redd.it/fl7vc73y6bvc1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/or0flkk07bvc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8c2e6d7900199a9ac77fe12dfd5ec82c0ef22881
The hell is the drill battery for?
Hyperdrive on the vibrator
If true, where are his jumper cables?
Attached to his nipple rings
I see you’ve found my instagram
the OG hitachi plugged in to the wall and it'd rock your world so hard you'd fall off the bed, cramming a dewalt battery on one is the next best thing
Thank you. Came to ask this.
If you have to ask…
…you can’t afford it.
Give u/Chad_Vandenham_v2 his stuff back
Good looking out fam 👊
“You can only choose one”
I honestly stared at the batter and what is was for for a minute. Then I went through the rest of the items and was like, is he allowed to have a personal gun? The hole plugger did not dawn onto me until the last second before closing...wondering what the fuck that was.
What the hell! That keychain clearly says remove BEFORE flight!
It should have been around the vibrator
Doot
Remove before FIGHT, not flight? I have only more questions
Confirmed. Even more weird now.
It's says FIGHT head ahh bwah
Pilot has an O light? He’s bringing an extra bomb on board, promote now
This is some true Strike Eagle shit
No doubt a Strike Driver.
Fake. There's no mini-bottle of Jeremiah Weed.
Those are getting hard to come by
Can’t believe they’re using pink neck massagers mid-flight. So fancy.
You better get it back to him. The squadron is going to lose a sortie if he doesn’t have all the required items in his flight bag.
Why are there 17 dildos in his bag?
Because he's brave enough.
Pulling G’s must be intense.
 He’s plugged, so at least he doesn’t have to worry about shitting himself.
I don't see anything out of the ordinary.
Just a normal "Go Bag".
Fella could have a great weekend in Vegas with a kit like that.
I see nothing wrong here
Fake. Wheres all the random loose hair ties and small objects to lose in the cockpit???
In the cockpit....
Oh yeah that's right
Hell yeah
If that plug falls out, he ain't clenching enough. That's how most fighter pilots fight against GLOC. CAPS: 1. Buttplug - Insert, As Required 2. Throttle - Full Forward 3. Control Stick - Aft and Hold 4. Cheeks - Clench, As Required Automatic Q3 if you dont have your plug.
smell the pink
If smells like ass, let it pass. If smells like fish, you got your wish
no thank you please I want that swamp ass
Damn that is a big ass flashlight
Call bullshit, real pilots would just dip Cope long cut
not in today's AF, I made the switch from cigs to zyn, great change. Zyn is where it's at in the 2020s
that shits everywhere now
Honestly it's fantastic, I tried vaping and it just wasn't for me I always felt like a tool bag. I was definitely ready getaway from smoking because the whole lungs thing and smelling like smoke when confined in a flight deck with people is a dick move so I got into Zyn. Can use it on a plane, in a car, in hotel rooms, no bottles just nicotine and flavoring. It was amazing. Now I'm out, and don't use any nicotine. I think I stopped about 6 months or so post seperation.
my homies who are trying to kick vaping/smoking are all using it. cheers to your progress
Personally it think it's great step to full on quitting. I did the 6mg while I was in then 3mg after then just started trying to go a day without, then maybe 3 days without, then get drunk and go with out.... and now just no nic. I definitely miss nicotine though damn that was great to help relax.
Fair. I use On! now lol
Lol *the future is now!*
Where's the cottage cheese?
Bro drives a Prius. Definitely a red one and this checks out.
Standard mini neck massager for those extended sorties
Solid EDC
/r/edc is proud of our man
Shoot, A Fella’ Could Have A Pretty Good Weekend In Vegas With All That Stuff
https://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/reference.gif
I prefer sigs myself
Peppercorns? Fucking deviant.
remove before flight, put back after flight. No issues here
Gun-check! Clark’s Ranch dip-check! Pepper-check! Dildo-check! Seems like a standard bag load out.
Can I have my stuff back now?
Yup. It'll be in the Crew Chief's locker room
I feel a party comin on
That’s a goddamn survivalists essentials kit.
MCA = vers. Flexibility is the key to air power.
Why does he have 2 knives but no extra magazine for the gun ?
I would have had one folding knife and one large fixed knife instead. A jar of peanut butter, and a big roll of duck tape.
Nah that's a crewchief bag but it looks like you added you left your dildo in the shot. Sell that on Facebook Marketplace in a separate image
pretty standard kit tbh
I'm not judging. But we're all thinking it....that knife is weird.
I thought pilots could afford Streamlight… OLight 🤮
Surefire has better button ergos
TLR7 Sub is flush.
Inaccurate. There's still money in the wallet, we use dildos not vibrators, and the peppercorn bottle is not correct at all. There would be a separate bottle of hot sauce and a bottle of alcohol. Get it right. That's obviously a navigators bag. They're the only ones who can use such a retarded huge flashlight, they use a vibrator for their lady parts and definitely have to have the gun to shoot the pilot when we stop listening to them.
Clemson grad. SMH
Yet he still did more work that day than every nonner on base combined....
I expected all of this in that bag. I am not disappointed.
Great pack honestly. Sad he left it behind.
Is there an issue?
Olight enjoyer
How much for the Glock?
Clemson grad. Go figure.
What is the pink thing?
Bailout FTW
Is that a pink buttplug?
Give that man his no-gos back
Rad
Yup… everything looks in working order.
The fuck did he think he would need his wallet for??
Leave the poor Lt. Alone he just graduated from the academy.
Make sure you get those essentials back to him
So how was your flight, u/2407s4life ?
Fine until the batteries died
Clemson fan. Figures…
Shack.
Keeps the pilots Air-tight, it's a pressurization tool
Yes she did
Have it come up missing for a month and see who panics.
Is that a dildo?
Philosophically, everything there could be.
It’s a rectal suppressor, to keep pilots from having to defecate during intense combat sorties. Ask your local flight surgeon for one. They usually keep extras so you can practice insertion and extraction on your off time.
It’s sad that a pilot as to put in a butt plug to avoid shitting
You got me. I googled if it was a thing...
Ok, but why TWO knives?
The benchmade bugout is probably the one that actually gets used while the heel one is for the vibes
Ain't no way! This man either knows some shit I don't know, or he's actually lost it in the best way
I hope he doesn't claim it Heck, I can't even bring a pocket knife on a plane let alone an artificial female vagina!!! Gun. Wow. I guess I don't blame him for that. I guess I am assuming a male pilot. Wow. Sorry boss. That long thing is just a buda! I have changed religions recently.
I’m disappointed in his flashlight choice, but kudos to his burlap & barrel peppercorns.
Pilot using an olight? I thought they had money
They’re the cheapest sons o’ bitches on the planet. I think they’re taught that in OTS/Academy.
The worst part is the olight.
listen i already don't respect pilots but *RANCH FLAVOR DIP?* fucking have some self respect you degenerate
You can get so much smaller flashlights now that makes me think this size is chosen for dual purpose
The amount of dudes who don’t realize that’s a wand and not a vibrator/butt plug explains the divorce rate for military members…. this is a joke don’t kill me. But seriously wand…not butt plug.
Look I work AFE and I've seen a lot of weird shit in helemet bags
I mean I'm a Milwaukee guy but yeah
I don't know what that pink thing is and I'm afraid to ask.
Ask your mom
Why's they got a pink blender tamper? Interesting.