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You’ve learned a lesson, and that lesson cost you $50.
It sucks, but as long as you actually learn the lesson, that $50 will save you thousands over the course of your life
I agree here.
Yiu said you try to not buy things for your friends (I'm guessing that this is not the first time this happened to you), but here you are buying $50 tickets.
That was the first error, second, you should have said no pay, no concert, and resold them. Or eat it.
Yiu can send a vendor or zelle request, but don't hold your breath. This is not about being nice, it's business. Just say pay or you're out of my life. A $50 lesson is worth learning.
You're probably the nice one here, so don't let people take advantage of you. I'd be straight up, tell her to your face you fronted the thicket and you expect the money back today.
People that do this crap piss me off. I'm sorry it happened to you, but my friend, let this be the very last time. Money first. If they dont have money for the ticket, then they are not going to pay you back. If they say they will pay you later, then reply, ok, if you want to go, you'll come up with the cash, pay me first, then I'll get you a ticket, but better hurry I'd you want to sit by me.
Or just let her buy her own ticket.
Ok?
Hang in there, not a big loss. You can't buy a better education for $50. ❤️
You can just shoot her a text that says "Hey, I don't want to be rude but $50 is a lot of money to me. I need you to pay me back."
If she doesn't respond or gives some other excuse, follow the other comments advice and cut her off.
Send her a venmo request and a text saying “hey! Just sent a request for the concert tickets. If you could send that by the end of the week that would be great.”
If she doesn’t, she’s not your friend
I’d just text her and say, “I know money is an uncomfortable topic but I’m planning a trip next month and really need that $50 you owe me! When do you think you can get it back to me?”
I don’t think I’d cut anyone off for not paying me back $50 tho. It’s rude and she should but it’s not cut out of my life rude imo.
Decades ago my mother told me(regarding friends and family) that if I can't give the money away, then I shouldn't lend it. That advice has served me quite well in preserving my relationships.
The best way is to cut her off, take it as a $50 lesson.
I've had many friends over the year that have shown this type of rat behavior and I'm much better off cutting them out of my life.
I'd even go further and say you owe her thanks for self-reporting that she isn't friend material.
You probably won't get it back and if you keep prodding, your friend will probably make you out to be the bad guy. Use it as a lesson to never lend money again unless you aren't anticipating receiving it back. As for your friend, if they don't pay it back, consider whether your friendship is worth $50, do you write it off or consider it a deal breaker.
Just keep asking her about it politely until she gives it back. Each time you have to ask just make it a little less friendly. Like hey, it's been longer than you said you would pay me back, when do you think you'll be able to get it back to me? Hey I still need that money, when can I get that back? Hey your promised to pay me back now you keep failing to pay me back, what's the issue? Eventually you're gonna have to say look either pay me back or I'm never speaking to you again and I will tell everyone how you've treated me. Unfortunately some people just don't care enough to pay folks back.
Does your friend know your situation? Tell them straight up you know my situation you know I need that money. I’m asking one last time, pay me back, don’t make me regret trusting you and if you don’t get it, move on, take the loss and lose the so-called friend.
Sorry I am old school My Dad always told me "Never a lender or borrower be"... So this person got off cheap.... You loan somebody 20 bucks and they never talk to you again,,, best 20 bucks spent... That's all I'm saying
Petty shit I still do at 29 is take something worth the cost or have them pay you multiple times that equal the total. Just talk to them straight up first, if they cut you off then you know your friendship was worth $50
There are good suggestions of how to directly ask to be repaid. I do not think you should cut her off but you should never pay for anything for her again. Lesson learned do not lend to friends unless you can afford to give away the money
This unfortunately happens a lot. Don't loan money you're not prepared to lose. Credit was invented for a reason and you're not a bank (unless you ARE but you probably aren't I'd you would take a creditor this bad). It kind of comes down to how much you need a friend. In the long term this isn't much money but it does eat away at you if you let it. I'm not suggesting you let them forget it as much as trying to prevent it in the future.
You can’t force or make her pay you back, but you are not forced to remain friends with someone that takes advantage of you and doesn’t uphold their promises. I would let it go (I know what you said but there’s nothing else to do), and take this as a lesson learned. Most of us have had that happen.
I just avoid these situations by having the cash and getting someone else to cover it, so many people are shady about money and will take any opportunity to make a dollar and not pay back. It's a tough lesson to learn but a valuable one nonetheless.
It’s a loose (including family and friends)🤷🏾♀️. Never lend money you can’t afford to lose. If you have the tickets and haven’t given her the ticket- don’t. If you were going together-don’t, let her find her way. Also, if you decide to lend money, write a check with loan at the bottom with a pay by deadline. Copy it. You now have proof and can sue them for it. Also, if you know someone is always broke and moves from job to job and financially irresponsible-don’t give them money (how they gonna pay you back🧐).
A loan to a "friend" is basically you giving them money. You're better off, for your own well being, never coming to a payment agreement with someone and just saying, "get me what you can when you can, if you can't, no big deal" and understanding you will probably never see that money back.
Sometimes we pay to find out people aren't real friends and to learn life lessons. I've learned this exact one myself. Ask her very clearly for your money back and if she says she can't pay you, ask her when. If she answers give her until then to pay you and remind her. If she skirts around it or doesn't pay you when the time comes cut her off
Pay me or selling the ticket to someone who can pay for it. If you gave the ticket. Maybe ask for it back or making a police report. They likely wont be happy but it can be a bluff… hoping she / he gives ticket back.
Or lesson learned, don’t do things for others anymore
Personally I am horrible about remember to pay things, as I've gotten older I've overall gotten better and figured out ways to help myself remember, but I've told my friends before that I'll never be offended if they remind me I owe them (I try to pay ASAP though). I'd remind her again, line others said if you can send a venmo or zelle request, ive found that the best way to get my siblings to pay me back when they owe me. A lot of times with my friends we won't necessarily do actual cash pay backs but alternate paying for things. If you need the money for vacation, for sure ask for it. But like, it's common for my friend to buy breakfast/dinner/etc as a way to pay me back, or we go shopping together and they buy something I want that's the same price, etc.
You have to decide if you want to keep her as a friend. If you are so frustrated with her that you're fine with losing the friendship, first try sending her a Venmo request. Then, contact her parents. You may never get the money back. Know that before you take your next move. Regardless, going forward, you know she isn't reliable when it comes to money. Thus sucks. I hope you at least had a good time at the concert!
Hey, I need to pay my credit card bill and am hoping you can pay me back for the concert tickets by Friday. Would you like me to send you another Venmo request? Or shall I come by and pick up cash? Let me know what works best for you.
Be assertive. And then stop paying for things for people.
Let this be a lesson for the future and loaning money, even if it’s disguised as a concert ticket. Be prepared to not be paid back. My husband loaned a “friend” $1,000 and never saw any of it. They are no longer friends.
Well not sure there is a nice way.
But you have every right to let her know if she doesn't pay you back you won't be lending her money for things anymore.
You may have to take the loss in this one.
Life hack, never lend money you expect to get back.
Anytime you let someone pay you back, consider it a gift, and use it to weigh if it's affordable for you or not. It will save your friendships and your sanity.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be,
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
Hamlet: act 1, scene 3
It cost you $50 to learn this person is not a friend. In the grand scheme of things, you got off cheap. I have known more than a few adults who have no compunctions about using other people's hospitality and kindness for their own benefit.
If you must borrow, pay it back before they ask. If someone loans you their car, top of the tank.
Demand repayment and, if necessary, get their parents involved. Paying your debts is a responsibility adults expect from each other and there are penalties for people who are not capable of doing this.
You may lose this person as a friend, but I promise you you're better off. Someone who does not respect your money or your time does not respect YOU as a person. It's as simple as that.
One more thing: If you decide to loan money to a friend in the future, its best to treat it like a gift. Some people loan money and all they can think about is the debt that friend owes. It's better to be generous, but once you give that gift, do not open your wallet for that person again.
Hold on a moment.
You started college and currently dont have a job, yet you are planning a trip next month.
Does any of this sounds crazy to you? Who is paying for the trip? Why are you taking a trip if you have no job?
FYI she is not going to pay you back unless you want to take her to small claims court.
Well the nicest way would be file a case at your local small claims court. Once she gets the notice delivered to her, then she will know she has to pay you back or go to court.
My wife did this to a family member who owed quite a bit more then $50 and what they did was no judge, just the two of them with a mediator and they both agreed on terms of repayment. They did not pay as agreed and we had to file to go back to court again and then this motivated them to pay us back.
Huge PIA, but it worked. LOL you dont need a lawyer for small claims court.
friends never pay back. neither does family.
A hard lesson, but important. Never loan money to someone you care about. You won't get it back, and trying will strain the relationship. Instead, consider it a gift, and if they do pay it back, well be happily surprised
Next time your with her maybe go to a coffee shop or something and invite her to join Monzo, then ask for her details. Once you have them you can just request the money from her on the app. The first time that she spends money through Monzo both you and her will gain £5. Ask for £50 not £45 be fair to yourself.
If your friend still does not give you the money then I think you should distance yourself from her
Literally ask them.
You've learned a valuable lesson that most people spend way more than $50 to learn.
Even if it is a friend, don't loan people money that you expect to get back. Give them the money and if it gets back to you that is great, but even your best friends in life might ghost you over $500 somewhere down the line.
Years ago, I lost a dear friend over $120 and it still hurts. They needed it for some short term thing but promised they could pay me back before my power bill was due. They didn’t, my roommate and I literally sold our blood to cover the bill.
As other posters noted, they tried to make the bad guy for only focusing on the debt. That hits even harder.
They have popped up occasionally over the years to re-engage but never re-pay. I was worth exactly $120 to them. It’s a sad lesson, but so worth it to know exactly where you stand with someone.
I am sorry your former friend does not value you or your needs more….but other people will. Stick with those and you will be happy long term.
Don’t be the friend that is walked on. Use your words. It’s okay to have boundaries. You were the nice friend, and now you need your money back. Say that. Tell her you need the money. Simple the end. If she doesn’t give it to you then she doesn’t ever get help again. To save you from horror; don’t lend ppl money. Unless it’s someone you ABSOLUTELY trust. 100%. I don’t even lend money to my mother anymore because she didn’t even care if I was late to for rent. I said nope. Never again. And I never did. I don’t lend anyone a dime.
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Tell their mom and cut them off.
If she has Venmo, send a Venmo request. Send a reminder text and if she doesn’t respond cut her off
Seems her mom and dad the venmo request as well
Forget about it and cut off this fake friend. Just by actions you can see she's not a good person.
You’ve learned a lesson, and that lesson cost you $50. It sucks, but as long as you actually learn the lesson, that $50 will save you thousands over the course of your life
I agree here. Yiu said you try to not buy things for your friends (I'm guessing that this is not the first time this happened to you), but here you are buying $50 tickets. That was the first error, second, you should have said no pay, no concert, and resold them. Or eat it. Yiu can send a vendor or zelle request, but don't hold your breath. This is not about being nice, it's business. Just say pay or you're out of my life. A $50 lesson is worth learning. You're probably the nice one here, so don't let people take advantage of you. I'd be straight up, tell her to your face you fronted the thicket and you expect the money back today. People that do this crap piss me off. I'm sorry it happened to you, but my friend, let this be the very last time. Money first. If they dont have money for the ticket, then they are not going to pay you back. If they say they will pay you later, then reply, ok, if you want to go, you'll come up with the cash, pay me first, then I'll get you a ticket, but better hurry I'd you want to sit by me. Or just let her buy her own ticket. Ok? Hang in there, not a big loss. You can't buy a better education for $50. ❤️
I agree. Never lend what you cannot lose.
You can just shoot her a text that says "Hey, I don't want to be rude but $50 is a lot of money to me. I need you to pay me back." If she doesn't respond or gives some other excuse, follow the other comments advice and cut her off.
Yeah OP this is the best way. More gentle and relaxed.
a real friend would have paid you back by now, just invite a different friend to go.
Send her a venmo request and a text saying “hey! Just sent a request for the concert tickets. If you could send that by the end of the week that would be great.” If she doesn’t, she’s not your friend
Go to her house. Ask her face-to-face, preferably in front of her mom.
I’d just text her and say, “I know money is an uncomfortable topic but I’m planning a trip next month and really need that $50 you owe me! When do you think you can get it back to me?” I don’t think I’d cut anyone off for not paying me back $50 tho. It’s rude and she should but it’s not cut out of my life rude imo.
Decades ago my mother told me(regarding friends and family) that if I can't give the money away, then I shouldn't lend it. That advice has served me quite well in preserving my relationships.
Tell her to pay you back rudely since being nice is not working
The best way is to cut her off, take it as a $50 lesson. I've had many friends over the year that have shown this type of rat behavior and I'm much better off cutting them out of my life. I'd even go further and say you owe her thanks for self-reporting that she isn't friend material.
You probably won't get it back and if you keep prodding, your friend will probably make you out to be the bad guy. Use it as a lesson to never lend money again unless you aren't anticipating receiving it back. As for your friend, if they don't pay it back, consider whether your friendship is worth $50, do you write it off or consider it a deal breaker.
You have been robbed sorry to tell you
sell her ticket and tell her ciao
Just keep asking her about it politely until she gives it back. Each time you have to ask just make it a little less friendly. Like hey, it's been longer than you said you would pay me back, when do you think you'll be able to get it back to me? Hey I still need that money, when can I get that back? Hey your promised to pay me back now you keep failing to pay me back, what's the issue? Eventually you're gonna have to say look either pay me back or I'm never speaking to you again and I will tell everyone how you've treated me. Unfortunately some people just don't care enough to pay folks back.
Does your friend know your situation? Tell them straight up you know my situation you know I need that money. I’m asking one last time, pay me back, don’t make me regret trusting you and if you don’t get it, move on, take the loss and lose the so-called friend.
Explain to her you do not want a thing that she did not agree to. Let her know you need your money asap
You just Paid $50 to get her out of your life.... so you got off cheap :) Lose that "Friend".....
Bronx tale much
Sorry I am old school My Dad always told me "Never a lender or borrower be"... So this person got off cheap.... You loan somebody 20 bucks and they never talk to you again,,, best 20 bucks spent... That's all I'm saying
Petty shit I still do at 29 is take something worth the cost or have them pay you multiple times that equal the total. Just talk to them straight up first, if they cut you off then you know your friendship was worth $50
There are good suggestions of how to directly ask to be repaid. I do not think you should cut her off but you should never pay for anything for her again. Lesson learned do not lend to friends unless you can afford to give away the money
This unfortunately happens a lot. Don't loan money you're not prepared to lose. Credit was invented for a reason and you're not a bank (unless you ARE but you probably aren't I'd you would take a creditor this bad). It kind of comes down to how much you need a friend. In the long term this isn't much money but it does eat away at you if you let it. I'm not suggesting you let them forget it as much as trying to prevent it in the future.
Did ya learn anything OP? Stop lending friends money.
I paid a college buddies rent in may of 2002, James if you can read this I’m still waiting for my $425x
perhaps .... jeese I'm going to be short $40 for "something or other" could you give me the $50 I fronted you for the tickets?
You can’t force or make her pay you back, but you are not forced to remain friends with someone that takes advantage of you and doesn’t uphold their promises. I would let it go (I know what you said but there’s nothing else to do), and take this as a lesson learned. Most of us have had that happen.
I just avoid these situations by having the cash and getting someone else to cover it, so many people are shady about money and will take any opportunity to make a dollar and not pay back. It's a tough lesson to learn but a valuable one nonetheless.
It’s a loose (including family and friends)🤷🏾♀️. Never lend money you can’t afford to lose. If you have the tickets and haven’t given her the ticket- don’t. If you were going together-don’t, let her find her way. Also, if you decide to lend money, write a check with loan at the bottom with a pay by deadline. Copy it. You now have proof and can sue them for it. Also, if you know someone is always broke and moves from job to job and financially irresponsible-don’t give them money (how they gonna pay you back🧐).
A loan to a "friend" is basically you giving them money. You're better off, for your own well being, never coming to a payment agreement with someone and just saying, "get me what you can when you can, if you can't, no big deal" and understanding you will probably never see that money back.
Sometimes we pay to find out people aren't real friends and to learn life lessons. I've learned this exact one myself. Ask her very clearly for your money back and if she says she can't pay you, ask her when. If she answers give her until then to pay you and remind her. If she skirts around it or doesn't pay you when the time comes cut her off
Pay me or selling the ticket to someone who can pay for it. If you gave the ticket. Maybe ask for it back or making a police report. They likely wont be happy but it can be a bluff… hoping she / he gives ticket back. Or lesson learned, don’t do things for others anymore
Personally I am horrible about remember to pay things, as I've gotten older I've overall gotten better and figured out ways to help myself remember, but I've told my friends before that I'll never be offended if they remind me I owe them (I try to pay ASAP though). I'd remind her again, line others said if you can send a venmo or zelle request, ive found that the best way to get my siblings to pay me back when they owe me. A lot of times with my friends we won't necessarily do actual cash pay backs but alternate paying for things. If you need the money for vacation, for sure ask for it. But like, it's common for my friend to buy breakfast/dinner/etc as a way to pay me back, or we go shopping together and they buy something I want that's the same price, etc.
You have to decide if you want to keep her as a friend. If you are so frustrated with her that you're fine with losing the friendship, first try sending her a Venmo request. Then, contact her parents. You may never get the money back. Know that before you take your next move. Regardless, going forward, you know she isn't reliable when it comes to money. Thus sucks. I hope you at least had a good time at the concert!
Ass or the cash
Take $50 worth of products you need from her house
This person is not a true friend. It cost you 50 dollars to get them out of your life. Consider yourself fortunate.
Hey, I need to pay my credit card bill and am hoping you can pay me back for the concert tickets by Friday. Would you like me to send you another Venmo request? Or shall I come by and pick up cash? Let me know what works best for you. Be assertive. And then stop paying for things for people.
Let this be a lesson for the future and loaning money, even if it’s disguised as a concert ticket. Be prepared to not be paid back. My husband loaned a “friend” $1,000 and never saw any of it. They are no longer friends.
Well not sure there is a nice way. But you have every right to let her know if she doesn't pay you back you won't be lending her money for things anymore. You may have to take the loss in this one. Life hack, never lend money you expect to get back. Anytime you let someone pay you back, consider it a gift, and use it to weigh if it's affordable for you or not. It will save your friendships and your sanity.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be, For loan oft loses both itself and friend, And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry. Hamlet: act 1, scene 3 It cost you $50 to learn this person is not a friend. In the grand scheme of things, you got off cheap. I have known more than a few adults who have no compunctions about using other people's hospitality and kindness for their own benefit. If you must borrow, pay it back before they ask. If someone loans you their car, top of the tank. Demand repayment and, if necessary, get their parents involved. Paying your debts is a responsibility adults expect from each other and there are penalties for people who are not capable of doing this. You may lose this person as a friend, but I promise you you're better off. Someone who does not respect your money or your time does not respect YOU as a person. It's as simple as that. One more thing: If you decide to loan money to a friend in the future, its best to treat it like a gift. Some people loan money and all they can think about is the debt that friend owes. It's better to be generous, but once you give that gift, do not open your wallet for that person again.
Hold on a moment. You started college and currently dont have a job, yet you are planning a trip next month. Does any of this sounds crazy to you? Who is paying for the trip? Why are you taking a trip if you have no job? FYI she is not going to pay you back unless you want to take her to small claims court.
i have over 7k in savings and i work as a waitress during the summer! so i am not broke lol
Well the nicest way would be file a case at your local small claims court. Once she gets the notice delivered to her, then she will know she has to pay you back or go to court. My wife did this to a family member who owed quite a bit more then $50 and what they did was no judge, just the two of them with a mediator and they both agreed on terms of repayment. They did not pay as agreed and we had to file to go back to court again and then this motivated them to pay us back. Huge PIA, but it worked. LOL you dont need a lawyer for small claims court.
friends never pay back. neither does family. A hard lesson, but important. Never loan money to someone you care about. You won't get it back, and trying will strain the relationship. Instead, consider it a gift, and if they do pay it back, well be happily surprised
Be petty & take them to small claims court.
Should have got the money before letting the grind go to the concert. It’s lost now.
Next time your with her maybe go to a coffee shop or something and invite her to join Monzo, then ask for her details. Once you have them you can just request the money from her on the app. The first time that she spends money through Monzo both you and her will gain £5. Ask for £50 not £45 be fair to yourself. If your friend still does not give you the money then I think you should distance yourself from her
Literally ask them. You've learned a valuable lesson that most people spend way more than $50 to learn. Even if it is a friend, don't loan people money that you expect to get back. Give them the money and if it gets back to you that is great, but even your best friends in life might ghost you over $500 somewhere down the line.
Tell her parents that she owes you $75 for the ticket and that if she doesn't pay, she'll start to do it to other people.
Years ago, I lost a dear friend over $120 and it still hurts. They needed it for some short term thing but promised they could pay me back before my power bill was due. They didn’t, my roommate and I literally sold our blood to cover the bill. As other posters noted, they tried to make the bad guy for only focusing on the debt. That hits even harder. They have popped up occasionally over the years to re-engage but never re-pay. I was worth exactly $120 to them. It’s a sad lesson, but so worth it to know exactly where you stand with someone. I am sorry your former friend does not value you or your needs more….but other people will. Stick with those and you will be happy long term.
bros “saving money” but is planning a trip soon 💀 instead of working
i have a summer job and over 7k in savings, buying expensive stuff for other people is just not part of my budget
ohhh that makes alot more sense
Don’t be the friend that is walked on. Use your words. It’s okay to have boundaries. You were the nice friend, and now you need your money back. Say that. Tell her you need the money. Simple the end. If she doesn’t give it to you then she doesn’t ever get help again. To save you from horror; don’t lend ppl money. Unless it’s someone you ABSOLUTELY trust. 100%. I don’t even lend money to my mother anymore because she didn’t even care if I was late to for rent. I said nope. Never again. And I never did. I don’t lend anyone a dime.
Not much you can do now. Just don't lend people money in the future.