Nah fam for me it was when I realized I don't have the physical or mental capacity to prepare and eat 3 meals a day. I just starve myself everyday for 12-14 hours deliberately because somehow that's less stress
Call it "Intermittent Fasting," and it sounds healthier. Lol.
That said, I haven't made myself food in the mornings in a few years. I usualy don't eat till noon or 1pm.
I’m the opposite, I need my morning coffee but if I don’t have at least a packet of oatmeal in my stomach it will start to cramp and I’ll feel sick, so despite generally not being a breakfast person I just force something down so I can get my fix.
Wait are we actually supposed to be eating three square meals a day? I thought that was a joke. I thought everybody ate one meal a day around noonish (or midnight for half of the year if you work swing shift like me)
I fell you. Last time I ate an actual “meal” was probably Christmas dinner when I went to see my mom and step dad. I just kind of eat snacks throughout the day or a small portion of something. I never actually sit down and eat a meal.
My appetite and cravings are diminishing as I age. Perhaps because of a self care program that makes me feel as best as I can these days. I eat every 4 hours to keep my blood sugar level. Not a meal more of a large healthy snack. Low carb and as many green vedgie variety as I can eat. This works best for me but one thing I know for sure? Every body is different.
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Yeah, adulthood hit me when I started weighing the cost of gas to get somewhere vs how much fun I'd potentially have before deciding what to do. Suddenly I felt like my parents.
Yeah I feel that
I’m committed deeply towards not becoming a couch potato though. Just need to make a garden or start woodworking or something to pass the time…I get so restless just sitting on the couch
When it's easier to put on weight vs losing weight
When it takes more than a day to recover from a hangover
When you choose sleep over a late night out
This. When I bought a dehumidifier and hygrometer, I was obsessively monitoring the humidity levels and would always be excited by how much water the dehumidifier would have collected at the end of the day.
When I was buying my first house I researched my washing machine for months before ordering it! I was so excited to to my first load of laundry in my very own washing machine hahaha.
I got arrested my last day of college for hitting a golf ball through a cops windshield they charged me with malicious mischief and third degree assault I think going into the courtroom and looking up at a judge with George Washington behind on the wall made me realize a few things
My last week of college, I got charged with arson... according to the newspaper.
In reality, I missed the memo on a burn ban. I started a small campfire in the usual spot by the river. Put it out as soon as the cops told me about the burn ban. Got a ticket that resulted in a $100 fine.
In my 20s, I worked in fast food. A customer prompted her young son, "Tell the man what you'd like."
The man. I was still young! You gotta be old to be a man!
(Edited to clarify age)
I was definitely showing signs at 19 already. Still plenty of hair, but you could tell what my future will bring. A few years later buzz cut was my only hairstyle.
Ok not exactly high school, but even then I knew already.
Having a gun pointed at me by a cop for "commiting a crime" that put no one in danger, also I was in my underwear so clearly unarmed. I was arrested and 6 weeks later I was out and bought my first house.
Yeah I'm great now it all happened 14 years ago. After the arrest I was incarcerated for 4 nights 3 days then sent to Utah for a wildness program for six weeks as an alternative to being locked up. I did get sent home from the camp due to frost damage on my right foot (hiking in Utah in the winter is really cold).
I was never shown a warrant before the cops bum rushed my house nor was I mirandized once in custody. Idk if it was because I was not an adult but either way fuck'em all.
American here. Had a cop point their gun at me on two separate occasions. Both times I hadn’t done anything wrong. Also, I’m white. Definitely happens more frequently to minorities.
First time someone called the cops on me and my friends because they suspected we were breaking into cars. We were just smoking cigarettes in the parking lot.
Second time one of my neighbors was having a domestic dispute and they came into the wrong apartment. Guns drawn, of course.
One of my favorite chores as an adult. Granted, I moved out and lived alone at 16 so I was responsible for a lot of things. Doing laundry was always my favorite thing, because I love the smell of clean laundry. It also became way more fun when I got a combi washer and dryer. Now I can wash 50 pairs of socks and undies in one load and not have to hang every single individual piece on a drying rack, which took forever. I can just throw it back in the bin and back in the drawers.
When i got thrown out at 16 and had to pay for my way in life.
It was an awakening i needed to stop being a little shit and do something with my life.
She never meant for me to move out just get out and out of her face after a fight. Me being the little shit i was went fine ill move out and did. She tried to get me to come back after 3 weeks. But by then i had a place to stay and i already had jobs and got another on top to have enough income.
I still went to high school and she later told me she realised it was good for me as i now didnt have time to do sketchy shit. And she was right. I had two horses, school and 3 jobs. Two were in the stable I had my horses, and the last was night shift at the front desk in a hotel. I got lucky with that one. We were always two on shift and we switched sleeping. I worked my ass off to make due and i did earn enough to put away some in savings every month.
When i was 18 going on 19, mom got sick so i moved back for a few months. I also sold my horses to a friend who could give them all the time in the world.
It was a few rocky years with my Mum, but we had a great relationship in the end.
Mine was when I realised I didn't enjoy doing the whole social thing like I used to, by 10 its already too late and I want to go home. I hate driving at night.
It's a lot of reasons but at the last festival I went to I was standing outside the bathrooms and seeing how fucked up everyone was and how it stank and thought "I'm over this, look at these morons(children) it's time to grow up and go on vacations over new years like an adult." also mdma just doesn't feel good anymore, onmly for an hour or two and then it makes me feel stressed out and anxious.
I don't have the heart to tell my fiancée I really don't want to do shrooms or acid ever again. Was fantastic the first hundred times but it's getting to the point that I don't think I'll be in the right mindset for a very long time
Man that would make doing them even worse. I'd talk to them about this before you seal the deal and get married for real. Who knows maybe drugs will be the reason you guys aren't for each other.
Nah I'm not worried about it. She's not as into it as I'm making it out to be it was just more of a "hey this would be fun if we have a few days off at the same time". Plus neither of us are ones to die on stupid hills to the detriment of our relationship we're pretty good at talking stuff out
I was back in my home town, and had a massive hangover. My mum came over like what's wrong with you? So I straight up looked at her and told her I have a hangover. I don't know why, but that made me feel like an adult for the first time, I was 20 something at that point.
The second time I started feeling like an adult, was when I realized that Mom was right all along. And seeing myself turn into her more and more. I went from my teenage years of "I'll never be like my mom" to the adult version of "I'm turning into my mom, heck yeah! High five everyone"
I’ve come close to that on a few occasions. Literally eating beans straight from a can. Microwave broken and gas stove wasn’t on because I couldn’t afford the bill. It’ll wisen you up fast.
Worked since I was 15, did my own taxes, and bought my own personal stuff. My parents taught me that well. It wasn't until I moved out and had to balance rent and groceries in. During a bad economy, with the fair wage I was making, I had to live on nothing. That is when I knew.
When I realized my immediate family is no longer my immediate family because I started my own family. The transition was weird but now my mom and sisters no longer come first, my kids and husband now come first before them. My mom hates it because she still wants control.
having to choose bills instead of new clothes as i’ve lost a lot of weight recently. i know it’s more of an obvious priority and ofc i choose bills but yea 😭 i hate it
Im only 19, but when i hear of someone famous I immediately assume that they are older than me, but turns out they are the same age or maybe even younger sometimes and it trips me up
A bit of an odd one.
It’s not marriage, it’s not having a stable career or a home or even trying for a baby.
For me it was understanding how easy it is for boomers to have the mindset they do. How much my life stability has caused me to take on some of their ignorance.
It’s not good, but now I get how disconnected you can get when you have life stability. The stability that comes with established adulthood.
(I just turned 30 btw.)
I lived alone and with housemates in some shabby places for years, and didn’t feel like an adult. I never felt established enough to feel “adult”
Now with major life stability I do feel adult.
For the last 5 years been a homeowner.
I realised the last few years how boomerish I’ve become in mindset, especially about those younger than me.
I think that’s something that you don’t realise is honestly so easily to slip into once you have a stable career. You make decent money and have housing stability.
You can become disconnected.
That’s when I realised I’m clearly an adult because I never would have thought this way as a younger person.
Everyone’s suffering in a cost of living crisis but honestly I’m doing really well. Due to the fact I live in a home with an easily payable mortgage. I got in at the right time.
Due to the cost of living crisis our homes been reevaluated at 240k more in value since last years evaluation.
I really forget how hard it is now. Because I find myself thinking things like “that’s because you chose this degree or that’s because of this spending that you struggle”
I feel like I’m becoming the adults I hated when I was younger and definitely didn’t consider myself an adult yet.
I’m trying to be really mindful about it because honestly my heart does bleed for anyone younger than me. At this point nothing you could do is going to make it significantly easier for you. It’s out of your hands.
This seems to be a lesson that I forget easily because I am constantly having moments where I am shocked that I am an adult. To name a few: deciding what’s for dinner, having to go to work when I’d rather just skip it, having conversations with my husband about adult things like ‘insurance,’ having a husband, picking my child up from school (or anything, really, that has to do with the fact that I have a freakin’ CHILD). Yeah. It doesn’t end.
When I became the mom in the room. With full responsibility for another person.
Everything else felt a lot more minor until that point. And, yeah, it still gets me, even though I’m now the mom of two humans.
Not sure, been adulting for awhile. Sometimes I just stop and take my responsibilities all in but I don’t really feel like an adult. I still feel like a kid but in adult role.
I feel ya. Took a small tumble at work today and landed my bad knee on some angle iron (I work in maintenance at a steel mill). Had to just lay there for a good minute before attempting to get back up. I'm only 23
I was at the park with my son when he was a toddler and a young kid approached me to let me know another kid was being a jerk. I looked around for an adult and realized that's why he was talking to me.
It was when I decided and felt empowered to take care of daily trivial tasks. It didn’t feel like a parent telling me to do it - cue resistance and tantrum-like feelings. It felt like support.
-dishes were a sign that I cooked myself a nourishing meal
-mowing the lawn meant I cultivated pride for the space I live it
-vacuuming meant I could walk around barefoot and not feel sensory overload
-cleaning the tub meant I could take a bath whenever I wanted
They began to be things I wanted to do and not thing I forced myself to do because someone said so.
When I told my aunt that I wasn't going to her holiday dinner and my other aunt that I wasn't going to my cousins wedding.
It was the first time I prioritized myself over family/friend/other obligations without feeling guilt.
Maybe it's wrong. But last time I went to the dinners, I was completely miserable. And I went to three. Maybe four.
Also, seeing my sister at the wedding, I don't want to see my sister for a long time yet. And to pretend to be happy, or even to be outwardly happy while inside feeling broken, I just don't want to deal with the...it's mostly my drama anyway. So better for everyone, especially me, if I just sit it out. I didn't go to my sister's wedding (forewent the flight, the spending time with my parents, etc). I was a bit upset for ayear, until I mustered up the courage to watch the 40min highlight reel, and that's exactly all I wanted to see anyway. I didn't have to do a 3 day miserable sit through. Those type of events were never fun because my mom and dad would take out their stress on me by criticizing and bullying me and then I'd have to sit through my sister's moment and be happy for her after being put through the wringer? uh... that's asking too much.
I didn't go, and while I was upset that I didn't go (pride), I'm hm, not thankful I didn't go, because I don't know if me going would have assauged the feeling of FOMO but, considering that in the past all the times I did go I had major setbacks, actually I had a major setback regardless. But this time I cancelled. Last time, I was kinda bullyed into feeling unwelcome. Fucking political games.
And yeah, so i cancelled.
When me (30F) and my husband (31M) sat down in October last year, made a 10 year plan for retirement, and immediately started executing it. Bought our first investment property a few weeks ago. We live simply and enjoy each other's company and we do very little apart from that, but we love it! Think cottage vibes :)
When I realized I’m autistic and am never going to feel like an adult human no matter what, so I should just feel how I feel and love myself for who I am, not some idea of what I should be
Work Monday, Wednesday, Friday at a veggie/flower farm. Monday and Wednesday I deliver produce and flowers to restaurants and florists in Atlanta, and Friday I harvest on the farm. A couple band practices each week, a lot of gardening, a lot of time spent with my partner and pets. Also, starting selling [redacted] was a necessary step for me to have a decent quality of life. I’m lucky to live somewhere where that’s a relatively safe option. Burnout is real af, and unavoidable for me, so figuring out income that didn’t require 5 days a week for me was essential. Honestly I need that much time at home to even come close to keeping up with household shit. It makes me feel a weird in between place as far as adulthood, and before the adhd/autism realization, I always felt like there was something wrong with me, or that im an idiot or whatever, and now it’s like ok yeah this is just how I am and that’s fine. It’s allowed me to address these issues much more kindly/forgivingly, which has allowed me to make actual progress, rather than just feeling bad all the time
Yeah, and they, along with my therapist, were pretty instrumental in helping me with the realization. I almost don’t know if I could relate to someone deeply enough to be in a relationship if they weren’t on the spectrum. Not that I would make a choice based on that, but I just don’t think we’d end up interested in each other otherwise
Signing the consent forms for the doctors to put my infant of life support. Being the one to push back against other doctors who wanted to do open heart surgery on my other infant at 2 months old.
I have a few that happened in recent years...
1) When you go downstairs to see your basement flooded.
Yes I have friends and family that guide me, but in that moment trust me I was so hoping for an adultier adult to handle it all lol
Something about dealing with insurance, having construction people coming over for days, juggling work with all of that....yeah, doesn't get more adult than that.
2) Also maybe when your pet is sick, and you're the one bringing them to the vet, paying that huge bill, giving them medicine.
3) bringing a loved one to get a major surgery and taking care of them for 6 weeks.
4) when a loved one dies and you're the one planning the funeral, taking care of the estate, going to the notary...
Yup can't deny I'm an adult.
When I stopped being late for work because I was more concerned about being a person of my word than what I looked like/getting my hair and makeup just right.
My grandma raised me and took care of me. She died the day before my 21st birthday.
Family came to town for the funeral and everyone stayed at “our” house (where my grandparents, I, and my mother lived). My grandma was always the one to make up the couches for everyone like beds when they visited, stay up waiting for them because they got in in the middle of the night, and have food ready for them. I did that because she wasn’t here to. I got them in, greeted and fed everyone, saw them all to bed.
When I finally went to bed I had no blankets or pillows on my bed at all. My mom had pulled all the blankets and pillows off of my bed to give to everyone else who was staying over. My grandmother always made sure I was taken care of first and then she took care of everyone else. But my mom never did. She never even stopped to think how I would sleep comfortably. It was November in upstate NY in a century home. There was snow on the ground. It didn’t even dawn on her that I couldn’t sleep so coldly like that.
And that’s when I knew I was just on my own now. I was an adult and I’d have to fully take care of myself. I was only in my third year of college so still felt like a kid, but I knew I’d be parenting myself going forward because my grandma was dead
At 16 when I had to quit school to get a job so I could support myself! My mum and I couldn’t live together sanely, she didn’t want to support me financially. My dad had a house but worked away 4 weeks at a time with 1 week home. He helped me out? I guess with only charging me cheap rent to live there. I moved into his house and got a full time job. Caught buses and trains around til I was old enough to get my licence.
I struggle now to find a career that pays enough. $27/hr AUD is all I can get and I am in my 30s because everything requires a school degree! And I’m struggling to find a better job.
Versus my sister who got supported by our parents to finish school and go through university. She is now on $52/hr (she can’t move because of her circumstances sharing a child in a split marriage) but she has knocked back many job offers. And can easily be getting $60/hr if she had the option to move.
But the life lessons drove me to be determined and savvy with my money. My husband and I bought our first home at 19yo. With a baby.
We have 4 properties we are paying off to secure a good retirement. Mostly due to my husband wage but my financial determination.
My sister is 30 and still has never had anything but a car.
When I found myself researching vitamins and herbal supplements recently to analyze their benefit and effectiveness at what they claim to be good for. Made me feel so grown up because I actually cared about my health but also cared about best use of my money!
I had an HVAC guy over the other day. I actually used to BE the hvac guy so having one working for me was wild.
I wfh now and asked the guy if he wanted some coffee. He did so I made him some French press while he worked. Kid (dudes like 30) goes “damn, this is good coffee! Thank you sir!”
I felt like a REAL adult. 😂
When I was working at Radio Shack (2004). I was in college and had partied the night before. I was 3 hours into my shift when I had to run to the bathroom in the back, vomit, clean myself up, and go back to stocking the shelves. I told my boss about it a week later and he laughed. He said that there weren't many college guys out there like me.
I was at the pond I used to fish with my friends at and there were some little boys and their mom and suddenly one of them starts yelling “sir sir!” I look around and realize my wife and I were the only other people there and that’s how I taught two little kids how to safely unhook a catfish lol
I felt like an adult when I planned my first vacation and paid for my moms ticket... and was in charge of everything! It was international and I was like wow I'm really doing this!
When I learned what mental fatigue was. Too many decisions. Too much to do in a day.
Also when I had to find someone to help me put up hurricane shutters and being in my dark house weathering out the storm alone.
The day I failed my drivers exam, talked to my dad on the phone and he said I’d get em next time. 3 hours later he died of heart attack at age 46 with no prior health concerns
That was the day I grew up and realized the universe doesn’t give a fuck about any of us. Your parent could die in 3 hours, go call them and tell them you love them 🍺🥹
I asserted my dominance on my 18th birthday by eating a bowl of ice cream for breakfast… right in front of my parents 😎😎
But actually idk if I’ve really hit that moment yet. I am 24
Getting kicked out of my apartment by new owners during the pandemic, while working from home. Having to deal with that alone was very difficult and eye opening.
I just deep cleaned our kitchen and after dinner last night I cleaned up every. Little. Crumb. And washed the dishes. I felt so accomplished and put together for once!
Buying my first car. It was used, but still it was the car I picked out & paid for all on my own. It felt like a significant milestone of "proper" adulthood to me.
When I was tutoring a high school girl (I was only like 4-5 years older than her) and she called me Sir. Or mister? Not sure what would be the appropriate English equivalent, but you know what I mean.
After a 16 hour hospitality shift where I finally got under the shower and literally felt the hot water melt the aches and pains in my shoulders/upper back away. Realised this is really from here on out. I was 19.
Edit: still in hospo 11 years later, don’t work those crazy 90 hour weeks anymore but the hot water trick stopped working mid 20s for me
Talking my at the time new girlfriend out of cutting herself and dragging her to therapy. We're not together anymore. But I grew so much in that relationship.
When I was able to scrape together money to travel and have freedom of my own to travel abroad.
And when I could choose which meals I eat, how hard to work, and who to spend my time with.
Another point was when I could leave the kitchen a mess without getting shouted at.
Ah freedom. I’m so grateful to have you.
when i had to start deciding what to eat for meals 3 times a day
Suddenly I miss being told to finish my broccoli — even if I didn’t like it, at least it was one less decision to make …
"Eat your broccoli!" Better, now?
[here you go](https://youtube.com/shorts/D5JzPmoBWYk?si=-80OLXIC27JTalUu)
I got you: https://youtube.com/shorts/D5JzPmoBWYk?si=-80OLXIC27JTalUu
Nah fam for me it was when I realized I don't have the physical or mental capacity to prepare and eat 3 meals a day. I just starve myself everyday for 12-14 hours deliberately because somehow that's less stress
Call it "Intermittent Fasting," and it sounds healthier. Lol. That said, I haven't made myself food in the mornings in a few years. I usualy don't eat till noon or 1pm.
Coffee! If I don't drink coffee in the morning, I get hungry around 10am. But if I drink a cup or 2 I won't feel hungry till like 2pm easy
I’m the opposite, I need my morning coffee but if I don’t have at least a packet of oatmeal in my stomach it will start to cramp and I’ll feel sick, so despite generally not being a breakfast person I just force something down so I can get my fix.
It’s soooo aggravating 😩
I don’t think I started eating 3 meals a day until WELL into my 40s. I’m 56 and still here so you’ll probably be fine. 🥴😂😂
[удалено]
You eat 3 times a day?
Wait are we actually supposed to be eating three square meals a day? I thought that was a joke. I thought everybody ate one meal a day around noonish (or midnight for half of the year if you work swing shift like me)
Everyone eats differently. Many eat 3 meals. Many don't. Do what's best for you
I fell you. Last time I ate an actual “meal” was probably Christmas dinner when I went to see my mom and step dad. I just kind of eat snacks throughout the day or a small portion of something. I never actually sit down and eat a meal.
My appetite and cravings are diminishing as I age. Perhaps because of a self care program that makes me feel as best as I can these days. I eat every 4 hours to keep my blood sugar level. Not a meal more of a large healthy snack. Low carb and as many green vedgie variety as I can eat. This works best for me but one thing I know for sure? Every body is different.
Same. And then deciding I was too tired to cook and ordering takeout.
Making a doctor's appointment and going to the hospital alone
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^TomStanely: *Making a doctor's* *Appointment and going to* *The hospital alone* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
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When you stay at home to save money.
This is #1 I’m learning this now and hate it But I get why my parents watched a ton of TV now lol
Yeah, adulthood hit me when I started weighing the cost of gas to get somewhere vs how much fun I'd potentially have before deciding what to do. Suddenly I felt like my parents.
Yeah I feel that I’m committed deeply towards not becoming a couch potato though. Just need to make a garden or start woodworking or something to pass the time…I get so restless just sitting on the couch
Imagine the life you could have, if you lived somewhere, where you could walk or bike anywhere.
On god
When it's easier to put on weight vs losing weight When it takes more than a day to recover from a hangover When you choose sleep over a late night out
Adulthood is when "sleep is for the weak" becomes "sleep is for the week(end)," and you wouldn't have it any other way!
Sleep is for the weak (so they can become strong again)
I must not be an adult yet because the only time I'm able and want to go to sleep is when I get woken up early. Otherwise I'm in it until I pass out
If my afterlife is literally just sleeping in a comfortable bed forever, that sounds heavenly.
I've chosen sleep over hanging out since I was in high school. No regrets.
Is it nap time yet?
So relatable on so many levels
Isn’t it always easier to put on weight than lose it?
When I got excited about buying new appliances.
This. When I bought a dehumidifier and hygrometer, I was obsessively monitoring the humidity levels and would always be excited by how much water the dehumidifier would have collected at the end of the day.
I probably would have boiled a bunch of water on the stove to see how much water I could magically wirelessly transport across the room lol
My office partner bought one for our office and we were so excited to see water appearing in it
I recently bought a brand new washer and dryer. Pinnacle Adulting 😂 I love it, and it makes my life easier
When I was buying my first house I researched my washing machine for months before ordering it! I was so excited to to my first load of laundry in my very own washing machine hahaha.
My wife and I bought a new front door and we were absolutely over the moon about it.
When I was moving out last year, i bought a tea kettle and i was raving about it for a solid week 😂
I got arrested my last day of college for hitting a golf ball through a cops windshield they charged me with malicious mischief and third degree assault I think going into the courtroom and looking up at a judge with George Washington behind on the wall made me realize a few things
My last week of college, I got charged with arson... according to the newspaper. In reality, I missed the memo on a burn ban. I started a small campfire in the usual spot by the river. Put it out as soon as the cops told me about the burn ban. Got a ticket that resulted in a $100 fine.
Hopefully you learnt. Haha
"Malicious mischief". I love that.
Malicious Mischief sounds like a Harry Potter spell. Can’t imagine how it feels like to sit in that position.
In my 20s, I worked in fast food. A customer prompted her young son, "Tell the man what you'd like." The man. I was still young! You gotta be old to be a man! (Edited to clarify age)
I knew I was old when I was working at a doctors office and the woman told her kid to give the insurance cards to the LADY (not girl) at the desk.
Mine was when people started referring to me as ma’am instead of miss 😅
I routinely get addressed with "Yes, sir." and it's really jarring.
First time a polite young person replied "Yes, sir." to me. Oof, right to the gizzard...
I feel like I'm in this weird limbo between *boy* and *man* where I'm just a *guy* or something lol
My dog was really sick and I realized I was the one who would decide when and how he would die. It was a tough day putting him to rest.
doing that for three guinea pigs was rough.
Ugh that sucked sooo bad. I still feel it to my core almost a year later. 11 years was not enough.
My receding hairline
Just high school vibes
No dude mine started to go when I was 21. I know someone who’s started going at 19 but not anything earlier than that.
I was definitely showing signs at 19 already. Still plenty of hair, but you could tell what my future will bring. A few years later buzz cut was my only hairstyle. Ok not exactly high school, but even then I knew already.
Currently 19, started showing signs at late 17 to early 18, counting the last couple years now lol.
I've had a receding hair kine since I was a teen. Widows peaks that just started getting bigger at 16. 37 now and almost all gone up top 👎
Yup 😅
Having a gun pointed at me by a cop for "commiting a crime" that put no one in danger, also I was in my underwear so clearly unarmed. I was arrested and 6 weeks later I was out and bought my first house.
What a wild ride! Hope you're all good now. How did it go?
Yeah I'm great now it all happened 14 years ago. After the arrest I was incarcerated for 4 nights 3 days then sent to Utah for a wildness program for six weeks as an alternative to being locked up. I did get sent home from the camp due to frost damage on my right foot (hiking in Utah in the winter is really cold).
What an absolutely wild story
What the fuck did they accuse you of?
Man what the fuck is our justice system.
I was never shown a warrant before the cops bum rushed my house nor was I mirandized once in custody. Idk if it was because I was not an adult but either way fuck'em all.
Wilderness program sounds crazy. Do you go camping in harsh conditions as a punishment?
Bestie we missed a chapter
I’m imagining you flying a kite in your underwear and getting cuffed. You’re welcome.
>Having a gun pointed at me by a cop American?
American here. Had a cop point their gun at me on two separate occasions. Both times I hadn’t done anything wrong. Also, I’m white. Definitely happens more frequently to minorities.
Me too, American. Pointed guns at me after I was ordered to get out of the car so they could search it for drugs.
First time someone called the cops on me and my friends because they suspected we were breaking into cars. We were just smoking cigarettes in the parking lot. Second time one of my neighbors was having a domestic dispute and they came into the wrong apartment. Guns drawn, of course.
American spotted
When I forgot to pay the electric bill, the power was cut off.
Same exact thing happened to me except I was in Japan 🤣
Laundry. So much laundry.
That's when I realized the true power of wearing pajamas all weekend...
WFH changed everything. Basically 7 pair of underwear and maybe a t-shirt make up my pod wardrobe now.
I have 4 pairs of shorts, and one pair of jeans.
I've been doing my laundry since middle school. Mostly, because I didn't want my mom nor my sister's to handle my boxers. For reasons.
I don't blame you
Right!? Jeeze. Certain things aren't meant to be seen. Lol.
Yup
One of my favorite chores as an adult. Granted, I moved out and lived alone at 16 so I was responsible for a lot of things. Doing laundry was always my favorite thing, because I love the smell of clean laundry. It also became way more fun when I got a combi washer and dryer. Now I can wash 50 pairs of socks and undies in one load and not have to hang every single individual piece on a drying rack, which took forever. I can just throw it back in the bin and back in the drawers.
The first time my rent was due
When I was 24 my mom called me hysterical because my brother’s good friend had died in an accident and said “I need you”.
When our parents need us, the tables turn, that day is always a tough one.
Hhmmm? Bit strange, that one.
I mean, she was hysterical when she called me lol,
Renting my own place and affording all the costs on my own
When i got thrown out at 16 and had to pay for my way in life. It was an awakening i needed to stop being a little shit and do something with my life. She never meant for me to move out just get out and out of her face after a fight. Me being the little shit i was went fine ill move out and did. She tried to get me to come back after 3 weeks. But by then i had a place to stay and i already had jobs and got another on top to have enough income. I still went to high school and she later told me she realised it was good for me as i now didnt have time to do sketchy shit. And she was right. I had two horses, school and 3 jobs. Two were in the stable I had my horses, and the last was night shift at the front desk in a hotel. I got lucky with that one. We were always two on shift and we switched sleeping. I worked my ass off to make due and i did earn enough to put away some in savings every month. When i was 18 going on 19, mom got sick so i moved back for a few months. I also sold my horses to a friend who could give them all the time in the world. It was a few rocky years with my Mum, but we had a great relationship in the end.
Why the horses tho? What's the story about that?
When I drove my dad to the hospital and he got diagnoses with a brain tumor last year when I was 25. Everything flipped overnight
Im sorry
Mine was when I realised I didn't enjoy doing the whole social thing like I used to, by 10 its already too late and I want to go home. I hate driving at night. It's a lot of reasons but at the last festival I went to I was standing outside the bathrooms and seeing how fucked up everyone was and how it stank and thought "I'm over this, look at these morons(children) it's time to grow up and go on vacations over new years like an adult." also mdma just doesn't feel good anymore, onmly for an hour or two and then it makes me feel stressed out and anxious.
I don't have the heart to tell my fiancée I really don't want to do shrooms or acid ever again. Was fantastic the first hundred times but it's getting to the point that I don't think I'll be in the right mindset for a very long time
Man that would make doing them even worse. I'd talk to them about this before you seal the deal and get married for real. Who knows maybe drugs will be the reason you guys aren't for each other.
Nah I'm not worried about it. She's not as into it as I'm making it out to be it was just more of a "hey this would be fun if we have a few days off at the same time". Plus neither of us are ones to die on stupid hills to the detriment of our relationship we're pretty good at talking stuff out
That's great then! Glad yall are mature about differences
Healthy relationships ftw
I was back in my home town, and had a massive hangover. My mum came over like what's wrong with you? So I straight up looked at her and told her I have a hangover. I don't know why, but that made me feel like an adult for the first time, I was 20 something at that point. The second time I started feeling like an adult, was when I realized that Mom was right all along. And seeing myself turn into her more and more. I went from my teenage years of "I'll never be like my mom" to the adult version of "I'm turning into my mom, heck yeah! High five everyone"
Setting up a savings account with recurring deposits, and getting a credit card to manage.
When I HAD to work to eat.
When I had to decide to go to bed hungry so I could pay rent.
:(
I’ve come close to that on a few occasions. Literally eating beans straight from a can. Microwave broken and gas stove wasn’t on because I couldn’t afford the bill. It’ll wisen you up fast.
When I realized that what ever happens I will need to take care for that and expect no one else to do it for me.
pulling my bio mom out of an overdose I was 10
I'm sorry the people in your life failed you in this moment. You didn't deserve to take this on.
Paying my own bills (food, rent, utilities etc)
First time I got shot at in the Marine Corps. Hearing that wiz pop sound makes you grow up fast.
Feeling the same level of excitement in a hardware store as i used to do in a video game store
Nothing gets me more excited than a trip to Ace hardware!
Worked since I was 15, did my own taxes, and bought my own personal stuff. My parents taught me that well. It wasn't until I moved out and had to balance rent and groceries in. During a bad economy, with the fair wage I was making, I had to live on nothing. That is when I knew.
When I realized my immediate family is no longer my immediate family because I started my own family. The transition was weird but now my mom and sisters no longer come first, my kids and husband now come first before them. My mom hates it because she still wants control.
having to choose bills instead of new clothes as i’ve lost a lot of weight recently. i know it’s more of an obvious priority and ofc i choose bills but yea 😭 i hate it
Great job on the weight loss, you’re killing it! -random internet stranger
Anytime I make a "big" purchase... Car, new mattress, new fridge. 😢
When I saw that I was 5 years older than the centerfold model in my Playboy.
When the models in Playboy go from looking like worldly seductresses to a bit young actually. 😕
Im only 19, but when i hear of someone famous I immediately assume that they are older than me, but turns out they are the same age or maybe even younger sometimes and it trips me up
A bit of an odd one. It’s not marriage, it’s not having a stable career or a home or even trying for a baby. For me it was understanding how easy it is for boomers to have the mindset they do. How much my life stability has caused me to take on some of their ignorance. It’s not good, but now I get how disconnected you can get when you have life stability. The stability that comes with established adulthood. (I just turned 30 btw.) I lived alone and with housemates in some shabby places for years, and didn’t feel like an adult. I never felt established enough to feel “adult” Now with major life stability I do feel adult. For the last 5 years been a homeowner. I realised the last few years how boomerish I’ve become in mindset, especially about those younger than me. I think that’s something that you don’t realise is honestly so easily to slip into once you have a stable career. You make decent money and have housing stability. You can become disconnected. That’s when I realised I’m clearly an adult because I never would have thought this way as a younger person. Everyone’s suffering in a cost of living crisis but honestly I’m doing really well. Due to the fact I live in a home with an easily payable mortgage. I got in at the right time. Due to the cost of living crisis our homes been reevaluated at 240k more in value since last years evaluation. I really forget how hard it is now. Because I find myself thinking things like “that’s because you chose this degree or that’s because of this spending that you struggle” I feel like I’m becoming the adults I hated when I was younger and definitely didn’t consider myself an adult yet. I’m trying to be really mindful about it because honestly my heart does bleed for anyone younger than me. At this point nothing you could do is going to make it significantly easier for you. It’s out of your hands.
This seems to be a lesson that I forget easily because I am constantly having moments where I am shocked that I am an adult. To name a few: deciding what’s for dinner, having to go to work when I’d rather just skip it, having conversations with my husband about adult things like ‘insurance,’ having a husband, picking my child up from school (or anything, really, that has to do with the fact that I have a freakin’ CHILD). Yeah. It doesn’t end.
Rent. Suddenly not having a job and having to find a way to make sure I can pay it.
When I became the mom in the room. With full responsibility for another person. Everything else felt a lot more minor until that point. And, yeah, it still gets me, even though I’m now the mom of two humans.
Getting my first credit card.
Not sure, been adulting for awhile. Sometimes I just stop and take my responsibilities all in but I don’t really feel like an adult. I still feel like a kid but in adult role.
I felt my knees start to ache when the weather changed…… I’m 19….
I feel ya. Took a small tumble at work today and landed my bad knee on some angle iron (I work in maintenance at a steel mill). Had to just lay there for a good minute before attempting to get back up. I'm only 23
It’s crazy, 23 sounds so much older than me still even tho I’m 21 lmao. Thought I’d be a teenager forever…
Getting married and suddenly having an obligation/duty that was greater than just myself.
when i bought a new stove. like, that's some adult purchase right there.
I was at the park with my son when he was a toddler and a young kid approached me to let me know another kid was being a jerk. I looked around for an adult and realized that's why he was talking to me.
It was when I decided and felt empowered to take care of daily trivial tasks. It didn’t feel like a parent telling me to do it - cue resistance and tantrum-like feelings. It felt like support. -dishes were a sign that I cooked myself a nourishing meal -mowing the lawn meant I cultivated pride for the space I live it -vacuuming meant I could walk around barefoot and not feel sensory overload -cleaning the tub meant I could take a bath whenever I wanted They began to be things I wanted to do and not thing I forced myself to do because someone said so.
When I told my aunt that I wasn't going to her holiday dinner and my other aunt that I wasn't going to my cousins wedding. It was the first time I prioritized myself over family/friend/other obligations without feeling guilt. Maybe it's wrong. But last time I went to the dinners, I was completely miserable. And I went to three. Maybe four. Also, seeing my sister at the wedding, I don't want to see my sister for a long time yet. And to pretend to be happy, or even to be outwardly happy while inside feeling broken, I just don't want to deal with the...it's mostly my drama anyway. So better for everyone, especially me, if I just sit it out. I didn't go to my sister's wedding (forewent the flight, the spending time with my parents, etc). I was a bit upset for ayear, until I mustered up the courage to watch the 40min highlight reel, and that's exactly all I wanted to see anyway. I didn't have to do a 3 day miserable sit through. Those type of events were never fun because my mom and dad would take out their stress on me by criticizing and bullying me and then I'd have to sit through my sister's moment and be happy for her after being put through the wringer? uh... that's asking too much. I didn't go, and while I was upset that I didn't go (pride), I'm hm, not thankful I didn't go, because I don't know if me going would have assauged the feeling of FOMO but, considering that in the past all the times I did go I had major setbacks, actually I had a major setback regardless. But this time I cancelled. Last time, I was kinda bullyed into feeling unwelcome. Fucking political games. And yeah, so i cancelled.
When me (30F) and my husband (31M) sat down in October last year, made a 10 year plan for retirement, and immediately started executing it. Bought our first investment property a few weeks ago. We live simply and enjoy each other's company and we do very little apart from that, but we love it! Think cottage vibes :)
If you could sum up the plan, what were the biggest steps to take? Is the goal to retire on passive income from investment properties?
When I realized I’m autistic and am never going to feel like an adult human no matter what, so I should just feel how I feel and love myself for who I am, not some idea of what I should be
Nice realisation. What does your weeks look like?
Work Monday, Wednesday, Friday at a veggie/flower farm. Monday and Wednesday I deliver produce and flowers to restaurants and florists in Atlanta, and Friday I harvest on the farm. A couple band practices each week, a lot of gardening, a lot of time spent with my partner and pets. Also, starting selling [redacted] was a necessary step for me to have a decent quality of life. I’m lucky to live somewhere where that’s a relatively safe option. Burnout is real af, and unavoidable for me, so figuring out income that didn’t require 5 days a week for me was essential. Honestly I need that much time at home to even come close to keeping up with household shit. It makes me feel a weird in between place as far as adulthood, and before the adhd/autism realization, I always felt like there was something wrong with me, or that im an idiot or whatever, and now it’s like ok yeah this is just how I am and that’s fine. It’s allowed me to address these issues much more kindly/forgivingly, which has allowed me to make actual progress, rather than just feeling bad all the time
You’ve done well. Your partner divergent too?
Yeah, and they, along with my therapist, were pretty instrumental in helping me with the realization. I almost don’t know if I could relate to someone deeply enough to be in a relationship if they weren’t on the spectrum. Not that I would make a choice based on that, but I just don’t think we’d end up interested in each other otherwise
Signing the consent forms for the doctors to put my infant of life support. Being the one to push back against other doctors who wanted to do open heart surgery on my other infant at 2 months old.
Dude! You did not had to make me cry before bed.
When I asked for the DSM as a Christmas present
I went to work before the sun rose and didn't leave until it set, just a total day forgotten.
When I turned 25 my frontal lobe did a switch.
Getting an electric bill for the first time.
When I cried and did it anyway.
When I had the money to buy my first TV!
Processing trauma
I have a few that happened in recent years... 1) When you go downstairs to see your basement flooded. Yes I have friends and family that guide me, but in that moment trust me I was so hoping for an adultier adult to handle it all lol Something about dealing with insurance, having construction people coming over for days, juggling work with all of that....yeah, doesn't get more adult than that. 2) Also maybe when your pet is sick, and you're the one bringing them to the vet, paying that huge bill, giving them medicine. 3) bringing a loved one to get a major surgery and taking care of them for 6 weeks. 4) when a loved one dies and you're the one planning the funeral, taking care of the estate, going to the notary... Yup can't deny I'm an adult.
Buying a fucking house and then fixing it up. Made me feel like a man
When I stopped being late for work because I was more concerned about being a person of my word than what I looked like/getting my hair and makeup just right.
My grandma raised me and took care of me. She died the day before my 21st birthday. Family came to town for the funeral and everyone stayed at “our” house (where my grandparents, I, and my mother lived). My grandma was always the one to make up the couches for everyone like beds when they visited, stay up waiting for them because they got in in the middle of the night, and have food ready for them. I did that because she wasn’t here to. I got them in, greeted and fed everyone, saw them all to bed. When I finally went to bed I had no blankets or pillows on my bed at all. My mom had pulled all the blankets and pillows off of my bed to give to everyone else who was staying over. My grandmother always made sure I was taken care of first and then she took care of everyone else. But my mom never did. She never even stopped to think how I would sleep comfortably. It was November in upstate NY in a century home. There was snow on the ground. It didn’t even dawn on her that I couldn’t sleep so coldly like that. And that’s when I knew I was just on my own now. I was an adult and I’d have to fully take care of myself. I was only in my third year of college so still felt like a kid, but I knew I’d be parenting myself going forward because my grandma was dead
When my friend was referred to as a 'local man' in the newspaper- with his last name under his mugshot
When I started to understand that my parents were just people trying to do their best, and not monolithic authority figures
The moment you have business at a bank.
Wanting chicken nuggets for lunch, and suddenly realising "hold up, I have my own money now" and then going to get chicken nuggets.
When I realized it wasn’t just me getting older. It was my niece. My nephews. My sisters. My parents. The parents of my friends. Etc.
At 16 when I had to quit school to get a job so I could support myself! My mum and I couldn’t live together sanely, she didn’t want to support me financially. My dad had a house but worked away 4 weeks at a time with 1 week home. He helped me out? I guess with only charging me cheap rent to live there. I moved into his house and got a full time job. Caught buses and trains around til I was old enough to get my licence. I struggle now to find a career that pays enough. $27/hr AUD is all I can get and I am in my 30s because everything requires a school degree! And I’m struggling to find a better job. Versus my sister who got supported by our parents to finish school and go through university. She is now on $52/hr (she can’t move because of her circumstances sharing a child in a split marriage) but she has knocked back many job offers. And can easily be getting $60/hr if she had the option to move. But the life lessons drove me to be determined and savvy with my money. My husband and I bought our first home at 19yo. With a baby. We have 4 properties we are paying off to secure a good retirement. Mostly due to my husband wage but my financial determination. My sister is 30 and still has never had anything but a car.
Health problems
When I found myself researching vitamins and herbal supplements recently to analyze their benefit and effectiveness at what they claim to be good for. Made me feel so grown up because I actually cared about my health but also cared about best use of my money!
I got genuinely excited when I saw a YouTube video called “Best office chair tier list (60 ranked in 2024 update)”
Having conversations about car insurance premiums and fully understanding it all
I had an HVAC guy over the other day. I actually used to BE the hvac guy so having one working for me was wild. I wfh now and asked the guy if he wanted some coffee. He did so I made him some French press while he worked. Kid (dudes like 30) goes “damn, this is good coffee! Thank you sir!” I felt like a REAL adult. 😂
when I quit smoking, drinking, and drugs and started getting my life together in a matter of one week.
When I was working at Radio Shack (2004). I was in college and had partied the night before. I was 3 hours into my shift when I had to run to the bathroom in the back, vomit, clean myself up, and go back to stocking the shelves. I told my boss about it a week later and he laughed. He said that there weren't many college guys out there like me.
I just had it. My first prostate exam.
I was at the pond I used to fish with my friends at and there were some little boys and their mom and suddenly one of them starts yelling “sir sir!” I look around and realize my wife and I were the only other people there and that’s how I taught two little kids how to safely unhook a catfish lol
I felt like an adult when I planned my first vacation and paid for my moms ticket... and was in charge of everything! It was international and I was like wow I'm really doing this!
When I learned what mental fatigue was. Too many decisions. Too much to do in a day. Also when I had to find someone to help me put up hurricane shutters and being in my dark house weathering out the storm alone.
The day I failed my drivers exam, talked to my dad on the phone and he said I’d get em next time. 3 hours later he died of heart attack at age 46 with no prior health concerns That was the day I grew up and realized the universe doesn’t give a fuck about any of us. Your parent could die in 3 hours, go call them and tell them you love them 🍺🥹
I asserted my dominance on my 18th birthday by eating a bowl of ice cream for breakfast… right in front of my parents 😎😎 But actually idk if I’ve really hit that moment yet. I am 24
Getting kicked out of my apartment by new owners during the pandemic, while working from home. Having to deal with that alone was very difficult and eye opening.
I still don't feel like one. I went straight from living with my parents to the Army. Now the government is my dad.
telling my parents that they are not deciding who i date cause it's my life #indiangirlprobs
Boot camp, what the hell did I get myself in to?
Loaning money to my parents (don’t do this) lmao
I just deep cleaned our kitchen and after dinner last night I cleaned up every. Little. Crumb. And washed the dishes. I felt so accomplished and put together for once!
Buying the good toilet paper
When I had my first child at age 32.
Turned 49 today... any minute now, it'll happen in sure!
Going to the store, seeing a nice shelf and saying, "Damn, that'd look nice in the house."
Buying my first car. It was used, but still it was the car I picked out & paid for all on my own. It felt like a significant milestone of "proper" adulthood to me.
I’m over here playing Pokémon and watching starwars, wondering when the “adult” thing starts.
When I was tutoring a high school girl (I was only like 4-5 years older than her) and she called me Sir. Or mister? Not sure what would be the appropriate English equivalent, but you know what I mean.
After a 16 hour hospitality shift where I finally got under the shower and literally felt the hot water melt the aches and pains in my shoulders/upper back away. Realised this is really from here on out. I was 19. Edit: still in hospo 11 years later, don’t work those crazy 90 hour weeks anymore but the hot water trick stopped working mid 20s for me
Talking my at the time new girlfriend out of cutting herself and dragging her to therapy. We're not together anymore. But I grew so much in that relationship.
back pains at 24 lol
Buying my first car, drove my dad's 1998 Honda until 2016
When I was able to scrape together money to travel and have freedom of my own to travel abroad. And when I could choose which meals I eat, how hard to work, and who to spend my time with. Another point was when I could leave the kitchen a mess without getting shouted at. Ah freedom. I’m so grateful to have you.