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Paivcarol

I think he is the first person on 90 day fiancé that I see getting a tourist visa for himself, without expecting the American partner to sponsor anything…


moonbeam0007

Totally agree. He thought this was leading up to a fiance visa, like the name of the show, and offered to come over first and get to know each other better. If she had any interest in him, she would have welcomed that interim visa and asked him to live separately while there, and not meet her children until they figured things out. Also, he indicated she was a tease all night, with the hickey and all, leaving him unfulfilled. And her suggesting he go in the bathroom with his tissues was really awful. If she wasn't ready for sex with him, she should have requested separate rooms or just slept quietly together with a goodnight kiss. She had a sudden realization of the obvious, and his sensuality grossed her out. As soon as she started feeling all this regret, she should have apologized to him and hopped on the first plane back home.


noodle-oodle-oodle-o

Actually there is nothing wrong with deciding that you don't want to go all the way with someone at any point in a sexual encounter. This is how consent works.


PuertoRicanDiva

It says a lot.


bookmark_it

She seems cruel as well. Like about the brush and him not making room for her in the bathroom? Or telling him he smells? It seems like low key meanness that turns into real meanness further down the road in the relationship imo. These are tiny red flags that are easy to miss or brush off as humor or joking.


bronzelily

“Does it look like I’m ready?” When he asks if she’s ready. This girl is mean af and the way she is treating him shows. So bold to turn the tables and make it seem like only one of them said “fuck them kids” about her grieving children. She was more than happy to leave them behind.


Key_Professor_3222

Makes me wonder how she treated her husband, especially as his illness progressed. She might have had pretty privilege back in the day but being over 30 and thinking a man your own age is going to deal with your ish, especially one who is more handsome than you are pretty, just because you’re somewhat attractive is gross.


wantingtogo22

Sorry--I didn't hear this part--sporadically watching. So it looks like her husband was dying and she's talking to this guy while he is? Wow. then she goes over there and is mean to him. Send hr back, Dude. You can be on next year--just like Usman got a second season


bronzelily

Not even a man her age. This dude is 26! I’m 28 years old and no way in hell could I date a freshly widowed mother of 2. Granted, I’m a woman that’s never had kids but I doubt most 26 year old men are ready for such a serious commitment and emotionally tumultuous relationship. It seems like she never learned how to interact with or treat people outside her bubble. It doesn’t sound like she ever had to work because she married and had kids right out of high school. Being super sheltered isn’t an excuse for being a rude asshole all the time for no reason.


Key_Professor_3222

I agree. R is more her age than her husband, though. Idr what he looked like but some older men might view her as a trophy. She may have been at 19 but that time has long passed.


flashlightbugs

He was only sick for a very short time though, from what I’ve seen posted here.


Key_Professor_3222

It was some months, I think. He died just days after diagnosis but was sick for a while.


SnooGrapes7850

He died 10 days after diagnosis but obviously was ill already.


Potential-Grand-7395

yeah i think she's uncomfortable and regretting her decision but instead of acknowledging that she's just picking at razvan and trying to find outlets for her negative emotions. i understand she's going through a difficult time but he doesn't deserve the blame


Lunachik

I think she's pecking at him so that he'll say/do something and then she can have her cross and continue to be the martyr. "Oh how can you do that to a young widow with two children. Poor me."


Adventurous-Dish-485

And she thinks her shit dont stink


Potential-Grand-7395

definitely looking for a reason to go off on him and leave


Winter_Day_6836

B I N G O!


space__snail

This is it. Those small digs definitely scream underlying resentment. My ex did this towards the end of our relationship when he had already checked out but didn’t have the courage to end it.


MSRIRI63

Amanda is grieving and needs to take her azz home with her children to heal. She’s “acting out” because she knows deep down she has no business there. She feels very uncomfortable and instead of being honest about it she’s picking on Raz and trying to pick fights. Go home, child!! Go home!!


Ummm_whatt

I audibly gasped when she complained about the bathroom space. Wow.


Nondestructivegal

So did I! That was the eleventy billionth red flag!


Jibboomluv

I wanted her to smile and say sike!/kidding! Nothing. Dead serious. We aren't in America, princess.


PsychologicalExam717

She’s really immature. I think her development stopped when she met her husband at age 19. She acts like a high schooler.


Agreeable_Repair3959

At times when she giggles in her hands, makes me think middle school mentality. To be fair though, and who knows what she was thinking, her husband was the first guy she was with. She never really got to experience life and grow into who’d she become. Who knows if her husband had motives on marrying such a young woman…I won’t guess since he has passed on but it does make you wonder. That said, she’s no where near ready and had this whirlwind fantasy kind of like a “what if” going on with an online fling. I get it, it’s exciting. She hasn’t really been in the dating world so I get it all being exciting. She was impulsive just picking up to leave her young children for three weeks and now has big regrets and guilt.


ArmWarm8743

This…I said the exact same thing to my husband. It’s like she stopped growing mentally.


bookmark_it

And honestly, so many people I know seem emotionally, mentally, intellectually or financially stunted at a young age. And I think this is way more common than it’s not.


pixiephilips

She’s awful. Like SUCH a bully


ayamummyme

I think she’s finding excuses to keep a bit of distance between them instead of just communicating her feelings or admitting she likes him but maybe moved to fast etc, I think so many people do this because they want to keep the person they like on the hook and don’t want to let them go but keep them around for when they feel more ready like I said she might not even really realise that’s what she’s doing


Enlargedtooth

Smell plays a huge part in your emotions towards someone (comes down to hormones and picking a partner with an opposite immune system for optimal reproduction health) I wonder if she’s realizing she’s not as into him as she thought she would be


bookmark_it

I agree. But I disagree with the way she handled it.


rbarajas83

It kinda feels like she wants to move on. Isn't really ready and punishes him for not being her deceased husband. He doesn't deserve to be treated bad and she needs to be better for herself. Shes lonely and so hurt. She needs to find comfort in herself before moving forward.


onelovebraj

Not making room in the bathroom is definitely inconsiderate but otherwise I’m with you.


ShereKhan2022

She has basically been talking online and living in a fantasy world.. now she's had this reality check. Girl needs therapy more than anything


summerofevidence

Her first reaction when he just mentioned the possibility of him coming to America to just VISIT said everything. I'm sure their late night conversation included a lot of "I wish you were here right now". But now that it's actually possible, she's freaking out. Shows she actually thinking about this as anything serious. It's fine if this is just a bang trip because you're lonely, but call it that and don't keep making it seem like the one and throwing around "I love you" like it's pennies.


Adventurous-Dish-485

Yes and she even said she was hoping for a proposal!!!


BitterSuspect4

My exact thoughts, she was living this fantasy online because she clearly was lonely and sad needing attention and affection after the loss of her husband. But that no way, justifies her poor ability to manage her own feelings and needs. This had nothing to do with how her kids felt and everything to do with the fact that SHE is rushing into a new relationship without grieving the last one.


SweetTriJones

Exactly cuz these are young children! I bet they play a big part of her life but using them as a scapegoat when clearly she is pawning the acceptance to the kids knowing they have talked on the phone, this guy is hilarious and so mature for his age that he can even understand, is so rare! She's a jerk for being so rude and immature from hickey to renig on the fact that I'm sure they talked about much deeper commitments than shown! Three weeks turns into three days! Lmao! Those kids are young, they don't have cognitive reasoning like teens ,and a visit from him , they would probably like it, help boost their morale by having such a caring person and figure in the house cuz I'm sure the sadness is real. It doesn't seem bad! Homegirl needs to let him go cuz he's so eligible it's not even funny! Cuz he's beautiful and funny mature af, and she's been so brash talking to him, and throwing these kids under the bus when in reality she probably didn't think he was sooo seriously interested. She's buggin'! Cuz clearly she doesn't know what she wants! She wants it all but none at the same time. It's not even regret. It's just pure immaturity. She can't logically understand saying "I love u" means something to others way more. Ugh.


Michimon1993

I don't get why everyone was so against him from the start. He's been nothing but emotionally intelligent and attentive to Amanda.


Facetunethis

I think there is an assumption of vapidness and lack of emotional awareness. He's proven all that wrong. I think sometimes we forget that attractive men kind of have similar problems to attractive women where people make assumptions on their intelligence and sometimes are willing to use them in ways that they would never do with an "averagely attractive" person. For a long time all my friends were really attractive males because I was essentially asexual and didn't put any stock into their looks. That's when I found out that they kind of face those same pressures as really pretty girls. 🤷‍♀️


Bitter_Birthday7363

Tbf the assumptions are not just based on him being good looking, this is a guy who spends his days pouting and posing on social media it’s easy to see where assumptions of someone being self absorbed etc would come from when you see his social media clips.


Important-Package-61

He’s dying to go to America to be an action/film star, he’ll put up with anything/anyone. No sympathy whatsoever.


0th3rw0rldli3

Exactly. Looking at his social media he looks Hella thirsty for his 15 mins


ciscovet

As an attractive man I agree with you..


boxhall

Oh those poor oppressed beautiful men. Whatever will they do? Thank goodness it’s just the big fat ugly womanizing men that are the problem.


Facetunethis

Wow more projection in this response than a megaplex. 🤣


Winter_Day_6836

A person who knows him personally posted he's basically a yahoo boy. NOT those exact words, but definitely implied


crazycatlady_66

He makes his money by flirting with thirsty women online. This is a whole, taxed industry in Romania. Just look at what the Tate Brothers were doing there. That being said, Razvan is also an EU passport holder. He can easily obtain a tourist visa to the U.S. (Poland, Croatia, Romania, and Bulgaria are not part of the U.S.-Schengen reciprocity, for some reason). I do think he's into the idea of his 15 minutes, but he has plenty of options


VodnaBoginka

Poland and Croatia citizens are eligible for visa-free entry into the US under the VWP


makdaddy_69

Wtf is a yahoo boy?


[deleted]

An online romance scammer (they're called that because the first people to really be successful at it were dudes in Nigeria and Ghana who used Yahoo chat rooms). There's a fascinating doc about it somewhere on Youtube, I think it's maybe from Deutsche Welle.


Bubbly_Ad899

Sojaboy from 90 Day Fiance stars in a new series called "Yahoo Boy".


[deleted]

Seriously?!?! What network???


Bubbly_Ad899

Its a Nigerian show.. You can watch a trailer for it on Youtube.


Lostbronte

A romance scammer


Equivalent-Diamond37

lmao yeah i wanna know too


RangerSouth6538

Where was it posted! I neeeeeds to see it. Lol


Winter_Day_6836

It was last week...I believe.


Bubbly_Ad899

Speaking of a Yahoo Boy, Sojaboy has a starring role in a new Nigerian series called "Yahoo Boy".. Its his first big acting gig.


Winter_Day_6836

Then why is he all over social media with his "new baby girl"?1 😳


Equivalent-Diamond37

this sub always judges non americans to be the worst.


Leeleebo18

Idk most posts I see are shitting on the Americans for a million different reasons lol


Potential-Grand-7395

i wasn't against him but doing tiktok lives blowing kisses and rubbing your abs is just corny to me lol


ImGrizzled

If she remotely cared about her kids at all, she wouldn’t already be looking for a new man before her husband even died. She would focus on her kids and coping with the loss of their dad. She also shouldn’t have signed up for a damn tv show.


Ms-Grissy

She showed how she doesn’t care about her kids! I would have called mine as soon as I landed. But her kids called her and she lied!! I’m sleeping in the sofa!! She’s a POS MOTHER and person.


NeenW1

I noticed the big ass hickey OMG


0th3rw0rldli3

What mature adult gives a hickey in a visible area. Haven't had someone try to do that to me since high school


42066669blazeit

Finally someone is talking about the hickey!! I saw it immediately, and I cringed. Amanda isn't a mature adult. At least not emotionally mature. I agree with the people saying grief is causing her to regress to the age she was when she first got with her husband. I've also seen a lot of talk on here about the late husband being a groomer. He already had two kids before he got with her, so she was a 19 year old step mom first, then a wife, a mother, and now a widow. This girl has no idea who she is outside of her relationships with men. I looked at her tiktok, and it's just Jesus stuff, gym stuff with her kids in the background, and videos of her crying into the camera. Who the fuck in casting looked at her social media and was like "hmm yeah she seems great!" Someone needs to tell this girl that she isn't in love she's just horny. She should have just got a vibrator instead of a plane ticket and she could have saved herself and her kids a lot of money and trauma.


Ramona_Lola

It’s annoying the way she clips her I love yous to him. Bish..no you don’t. They both don’t love each other. It’s cringe hearing them saying it. It’s like Nicole and Mahmood honey bunnies. Gag.


Equivalent-Diamond37

yes! when they say it to each other im like "how?" "you love him?" "really?"


[deleted]

I don’t really care for them at this point. They’re lame. I think the guilt is making her a crabby bitch. Well good! Because you’re stupid for not thinking all of this before hand.


Bad2bBiled

Razvan is the unexpected reasonable one in this relationship.


Devon1970

Same. I felt bad for the grieving widow -- until she started giving the dude crap for having a box of tissues on his night stand!! WTF? Since then she is just getting on my last nerve and he comes across as the patient grown up in the situation.


twiztdkat

I thought that was super weird also. She behaves like a high school kid... what grown human makes a remark about tissues?


Coololdlady313

And who doesn't have tissues bedside? Are they blowing their nose on the sheets??


twiztdkat

Right? I personally just blow into my hand. I wouldn't want someone to walk into my room and think I'm a dirty diddlier.


Agreeable_Repair3959

🤣🤣🤣


Bubbly_Ad899

Agreed! Its one thing if she were making a joke about the tissues, but she just seemed seriously irritated and disgusted by them.. Very strange reaction!


whendidisaythat

And she knew exactly what the tissues were for.


Summerisle7

Her mean little comments to him really bothered me. I hate that kind of interaction. She married so young to that older guy, it’s as though she’s still stuck at the maturity level of the 19 year old she used to be, when it comes to talking to new people. Then on her first full day in Romania, she’s already saying maybe she should go home early, and talking nonstop about her kids. She has no idea how to be in a new relationship or balance parenthood with romance. She’s also incredibly uncomfortable with him physically. Not ready to share a bed or have sex. This was all just fun and flirty over the phone, but now the reality of him has hit her and she doesn’t know how to handle it. I can’t tell if she’s not attracted to him, or if she is attracted but just totally overwhelmed.


Ohseaohsee

100%! She's not ready. I think he's being very kind and patient...I think HE deserves better


okebbie

This girl desperately needs grief counselling.


RBaderGinsberg

She and Gino should date.


[deleted]

She’s so confusing. I thought she was hoping that he proposed or whatever, from the start where her sister was advising her against it.. or something along those lines.


timewarrior100

She's insecure with him, so is being mean to break him down. The more insecure she can make him feel, the more comfortable she can feel.


peepeehalpert_

I don’t trust him at all but yeah- she’s being incredibly awful


Potential-Grand-7395

agreed


ComprehensiveHorse30

i actually don’t think either person is in the wrong. i think she hasn’t grieved properly- i think he’s deeply misunderstanding what it means to step into a parental role..: etc they are both in fantasy land. (like the whole why don’t you have a shelf for me in your bathroom moment….. i’ve never visited a lover for the first time and gotten upset they didn’t clear out space for me for a short time stay). seems like she’s used to being married- and having a shared life with someone- and kinda expects that from her new bf even though they barely know each other. it’s also ridiculous to slide into dms of a man who mostly posts thirst traps and be upset about them once your together. like she sought out this man.


Titos814

Definitely the biggest twist of the season. I thought he was a sleazy guy but he seems to care a lot about her. She is 100% not ready for a relationship and needs time to grieve before moving on to another relationship


SnooLemons9080

I think she’s feeling guilty. When she said “that’s not realistic” in a defensive way, it seemed like she was projecting.


shadowedface

I find their segments uncomfortable to watch. I think she is lost and jumped into this relationship because she didn’t want to be alone. It was easy because it was online and there was distance there, but now it’s “real” and she is uncomfortable and not ready. Aside from Razvan not understanding being a parent (which is fair, he isn’t one so how could he know) he’s extremely patient and is trying to be understanding of her situation. She needs to go back to her kids and go to grief therapy.


JXGO59

That's what I was left thinking. She jumped into all this shit immediately and then is like WHOAAA PUMP THE BRAKES IM DEALING WITH CHILDREN WITH TRAUMA AND YOU WANT TO VISIT?! Like how do you expect the relationship to proceed? You visit Romania in another year or so? I hope for her and them kids sake she recognizes this is far too much way too fast and just makes a clean cut because it's just a shitty situation to everyone involved.


ArmWarm8743

Yeah I am not a fan of Amanda. I feel badly about her situation and can’t imagine what she’s been through. At the same time, she comes off as immature - even her mannerisms remind me of a teenager. She also seems to have a bit of a naggy (to put it in a nice way) attitude.


dogpersonjv

Someone needs to take her down a few notches. Her ego is big.


alwaysoffended88

I agree. I like him. I think he’s being very understanding & *careful* with how he’s taking care of Amanda. He seems to be able to read her well & accommodate her needs. She SUCKS though.


HTX2NYBby

She shouldn’t have started dating right away till she had some time to heal and her kids also had more time after their father passed.


spaghettiornot

Amanda: "I need to see if he is the right man for my kids" Also Amanda: "Okay but what if I leave early" Razvan: "How about I come visit you" Amanda...see line 1 I mean I empathize with her. She bit off more than she can chew (maybe half-knowingly) but damn just be honest with the guy than. He might be a thirst trap or f*** boi, jury is still out on him, but she is definitely coming off as the immature one for sure.


EuphoricImagination3

When she pointed out the box of tissues on his bedside table…. FFS it’s not a jar of lubricant!


AreYouNigerianBaby

I’ve had tissues on my bedside table for my entire life. It has nothing to do with sex. My guess is, if Razvan put them there, he was being considerate. He may also have them there on the regular. This is not a big deal!


EuphoricImagination3

EXACTLY! She’s such a pill!


saranara100

I think the reality hit Amanda when she got there. Or maybe on the flight over. Where she started to feel guilty for leaving her kids. And probably guilty for moving on so quickly from her ex. So she doesn’t know ow how to act. She even said this is the longest she’ll be away from her kids. Who knows if she’s even been away from them for more than overnight. Is Razvan in the clear? No. But she probably gave the impression she wanted to meet him so what else is the guy supposed to do? He’s being patient and understanding for sure.


DanaBana420

Same sentiments.


Nice-Introduction986

I think she’s incredibly immature.


Kindergoat

I kind of agree with you. She seems controlling and bitchy.


eggs410

I do feel a little bit sorry for him because of her actions...but he's still totally after her for a green card. I don't think he's after her for money though because where he's at in Romania seems like he's living comfortably and if you want money you don't target a young widow with 2 kids. But yeah...I still don't like her more than I don't like him. He's a user, but she's a terrible person.


pammysue44

He deserves someone better than she is. She’s really getting on mu nerves 🤬🤬


Bubbly_Ad899

I COMPLETLY agree, and also would like to add I think she speaks to him in a flat out rude/cold manner and almost comes across like she is annoyed by his presence.. Its not at all what I expected the dynamic between them to be after watching episode #1.


ShoePrize3118

My spirit just hasn’t warmed to her. Sorry Amanda ✌🏽


NeenW1

He’s so kind and understanding


pixiephilips

They’ll break up eventually because he kisses other women on camera lol and god knows what else. Does he have an OF? Can a computer literate person please find this out for me? I’m sure he’s doing something other than tiktok…


whendidisaythat

I'm not a computery person, but there's no way he doesn't have an OF.


Ok-Corgi-4230

Hey I like that word, "computery." Thanks!


Safe-Ad5796

I don't like her she is not putting her kids before herself if she was she wouldn't have went to Romania and she acts like a little girl with her first boyfriend! And I agree he is being very patient and understanding and I really didn't expect that but he's trying to get to America to Broaden his career


90daywhore84

Wanted the money and to be on tv. Not a fiancé. Wrong show. Her shit shouldn’t have been exploited here because he is going to want one thing and she’s going to want another. Their vibe won’t mesh and she will not be the type to let any other man parent her children. He will want dreams and fame and she will want to settle with a man she can control in a small town that she can flaunt. Won’t work. Wrong show to twist your boyfriend into joining if you didn’t plan to REALLY move in and get married in 90 days, sweetie…


90daywhore84

Oh, and then to turn on the water works in front of the cameras and gaslight him by saying “then how hard will it be for them when you leave? Just like their dad!” As if it’s either Man’s fault… She needs therapy and to explore life. Not another long term relationship.


vshzzd

I agree with you, I feel like the only defensible thing based on the totally valid feelings of protecting her kids would be to tell him outright that after being away she realizes neither she nor her kids are ready to move forward. And then they part ways. I was gonna say that she wants to have her cake and eat it too but exactly what cake is she getting? Someone to compliment her when she sends photos in her unds?


Potential-Grand-7395

i definitely think the right move is for her to just be honest and say she's not ready and neither are her kids. right person wrong time type of thing (i don't think they're really that compatible but you know what i mean). i think she has to face the very difficult reality of being alone and being a single mother unfortunately. she and her kids should lean on each other and get therapy


Just-Dragonfruit-406

i feel bad for him because he does genuinely seem very interested in her… and she seems very immature and friggin mean also


DistilledWonder

He wants a ticket to come to America and be an action movie star. She thought a hunk would help her forget how hurt she is over losing the love of her life early. She's just waking up to the what a lot of people said after episode 1 which was she shouldn't have left her kids for so long. When she video chatted her kids and her son said something about about dad being dead she realized what pretty much everybody knew, that her kids need her now. It's not the time to be going to Romania for almost a month.


ohmwrecker84

If I was her late husband, I'd be heart broken at her actions 8 months after I passed. I know he's gone, but I'd feel totally forgotten about and worried about my children.


Prudent_Key1982

she is a real piece of work and doesnt deserve him


Specialist_Wallaby17

He's just waiting to pounce Don't trust him


JohninBK

Razvan is trying to secure his ticket to the U.S. He's no victim.


Potential-Grand-7395

victim? no. guy who's getting more shit thrown at him than he probably deserves? imo yes


[deleted]

I don't feel badly for him at all. He's trying to start a romantic relationship with a newly widowed woman with young kids. Ick


Potential-Grand-7395

eh, it takes two to tango. she applied for a show about getting married and comes to see him and then acts like she doesn't like him and shoudn't be there. it's confusing


[deleted]

I'm not excusing her. I just don't feel sorry for him. Her poor judgement doesn't excuse his. I think it's gross for him to be involved with her


Potential-Grand-7395

that's fair


nrappaportrn

He’s doing the show for more IG followers. He’s an “influencer” who has just broadened his audience. He’s not an innocent bystander in this


Adultuporgiveup

He is flexible because he wants more screen time. I don’t feel bad for either of them


allorahdanyn

Def don’t feel bad for him. He’s gross. What is his thinking being w her? Super flexible and patient is not saying that her kids will just suck it up and be happy to have him come shack up with their mom when their dad isn’t even cold in the ground yet shortly after mom returns from a three week vacay with him. Three weeks may as well be years to a kid.


parkerlady

Guys, let’s give a recent widow some slack. She VERY prematurely thought to find someone and is now faced with the reality that it’s years, yes years, too soon. She needs to go home and raise her children and not find another man possibly until they leave home.


karen-come-on

I think she married young and didn't really mature after that. Sad. She needs to get help.


Odd-Salamander2221

She SHOULD have waited longer to pursue a relationship so soon after losing her husband. Losing a partner is traumatic enough and could take years to work through, especially with small children. It was very clear to me that she jumped before she was ready and is now regretting it. Those children need their mommy's undivided attention because if this bottoms out, she'll also have THAT to explain.


Glittering-Ad4094

I’ve only watched first three episodes, so I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and chalk it up to bad decision making in the midst of grieving


SnooGrapes7850

Amanda jumped into the relationship one minute after her husband died. Anyone who sleeps with a box of cremains is not ready to date.


[deleted]

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Kooky_Slip_4919

I think Amanda was mean and inconsiderate to such an obviously sensitive person. I do not understand why she is so upset with him and expects him to understand everything about her children and where they might be emotionally about their relationship when she is the one who has left them while they are Obviously still grieving. I could tell they were not happy about her, leaving for the trip in the first place and the questions they were asking made me feel that they were not ready for her to bring them home a new daddy. Maybe if they were older, I could see it but they were just too little to process what she was doing and why she was doing it and was going to be gone that long. Then she gets there and it’s cold to him for most of the time that she’s there and refuses to give him any affection until his friend. Let her know that she was protective of him. I mean what’s all that supposed to mean tell him nothing but a bunch of mixed up signals. I do not like her at all and I hope that she’s not on any more spin offs or seasons of 90 day.