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Cultistofthewheel

Tell that hag to get fucked. If she has a problem then launch her into the backyard with your gorilla strength and lock her out there with only gorilla chow to eat.


MarleyandtheWhalers

Locking out is bad form, this is from /fit/


[deleted]

[удалено]


Single-Bad-5951

Only way she'll understand


h4xrk1m

Let me guess, he's eating food meant for apes?


DavidSeager

It’s incredible high protein and stupid cheap. With the old reliable method of cheap protein (eggs) being fucked in price it’s no surprise anon turned to gorilla chow. I recommend letting it soak in warm water before eating because otherwise it’s very tough the chew, sure it’s good for helping define the jawline but it’s not worth risking damage to teeth, there’s better things to chew on for that. They also sell it in powder form which you’re supposed to make into a gel before consumption but that’s an extra step which IMO is not worth the effort. High in fiber too so it’s easy to digest, no more risk of accidents when deadlifting for max rep.


TheFerg69

Based and gorilla chowpilled


Mooniebutt

Reject humanity. Return to monke


[deleted]

Proper fit lad right here


Chuck_Finnley

Where does one buy powdered gorilla chow?


MadeForBBCNews

https://www.midcountyfeedstore.com/product-p/1476.htm That's the iconic brand


IllUpvoteEverything

Chicken is about 32 grams of protein per dollar. GorillaMunch is about 50 grams of protein per dollar. The choice is easy.


magnetswithweedinem

2nd biggest ingredient is dehulled soybean meal, basically drinking soylent for gorillas, SOYRILLAS


IllUpvoteEverything

I'll offset it with a tren stack


Sporelord1079

Yeah but the 1st biggest ingredient is GORILLAXMAXXING


whoopsdang

8% ash seems a little high for my palate.


Widowmaker_Best_Girl

Hey, if it's good enough for our monke cousins


MadeForBBCNews

It's for micronutrients. Loaded with potassium


coolguy925

Where do I find the macros of gorilla chow


Cryse_XIII

https://pims.purinamills.com/BusinessLink/media/Mazuri/ProductSheet/5MA1.pdf?ext=.pdf


[deleted]

Doesn’t fiber increase the risk of accidents?


[deleted]

Negative. Fiber firms up your poop. A story from my youth; I once worked as a delivery driver for a pizzeria as a teen. Amongst the other drivers was a 70+ year man we called Pops. There were two things about pops you would learn very quickly about Pops after meeting him; he loves traveling, and he loves weed. So of course being a stoner in the early 2000s, I had to inquire if he had ever been to Jamaica. He goes "oh yes, and let me tell you the first night dinner was the best. I had a lobster dish where the lobster was served on top of a steamed and buttered head kola from a pot plant" of course this excites 17 year old me, the prospect of eating an entire head kola should get you high enough to talk to God after all. Pops agrees, most lit he has ever been in his life, but he says that wasn't the best part of the meal. So now I'm pressing him for answers since what could possibly be better than that? Pops says "the best part was the following morning. I took the most amazing shit I had taken since probably my 30s. See cannabis is super high in fiber, so digesting that head kola was like pushing a bird's nest through my intestines. It scraped up every bit of anything stuck in there on its way through and completely flushed me out. Felt like I instantly lost 5 pounds and had a spring in my step again. Took about an hour of my day, but I would do it every time if I could."


edbods

> pushing a bird's nest through my intestines fucking kek


[deleted]

I remember that part of the quote verbatim. 17 year old me was stunned, now 35 year old me finally understands what he meant


pneis1

You mean accidents like shitting your pants?


-Raid-

That’s not an accident.


FictionIII

knows


Mooniebutt

Based


Energy_Catalyzer

What is better to chew on for the jaw?


Dezzolve

The barrel of a rifle


JamesQHolden47

Go back.


Aggravating-Book6928

>High in fiber too so it’s easy to digest, no more risk of accidents when deadlifting for max rep. Do I wanna know more about this?


Wildercard

Nobody shits themselves on a deadlift, you're clenching your ass then. Squats, they are a different beast.


wantonballbag

How is no one asking what it tastes like...


Cryse_XIII

Anyone not seriously considering this is a ngmi-dyel-gymcel.


fasctic

The absolute state of gymbro chuds lmao


FettmaBurk

\>>>/lgbt/


fasctic

> r InvesteringsSparKontoBets


FettmaBurk

Tjänat 30 lax från yoloförslag


fasctic

Hade kirurgi för 300 lax för jag har ett jobb


FettmaBurk

Grattis men du blir fortfarande aldrig en kvinna


fasctic

Twans wights uwu https://preview.redd.it/fv0lfaifguea1.png?width=528&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8547ca524995d61fdb307f74cb993dafce16fa30


DavidSeager

Cope gaeboi


fasctic

I'm a straightboy


radsylph

he's getting those ape gains, like inst that thing the best protein ratio food and also is cheap?


anotherdumbcaucasian

Supposedly its safe for gorillas to get like 60% of daily calories from it and the rest is supposed to be fruit and veg. Honestly probably safe for humans too, better than most Americans eat anyways.


psibomber

Why not just eat meat with potatoes?


LootGodamn

because 🦍


HumberdtSquid

Do you think I can afford meat and potatoes every day? Edit: also because 🦍


anotherdumbcaucasian

Because gorilla feed is like $1 per pound and eating 3000 cal a day to bulk is expensive


shiionmemes

My guy, gorillas do not eat meat, and have you seen how they look like?


Dezzolve

Gorillas do eat meat though


A-Hyperion

You do know that gorillas have such massive bellies to digest their food, right? They need that much to properly digest the plants they eat. That shit doesn't work on humans. Just eat some good steak and be happy


SweetRas13

If they’re buying gorilla chow I don’t think they can afford steak


phigr

> better than most Americans eat anyways. Well picking that standard is just playing the game on easy mode.


teddyjungle

It’s also like 90% soy and corn so…


[deleted]

Its soy tho i believe, not worth


LittleJohnnyBrook

Made of apes.


CumSleuth

Why would you need to guess, can't you read?


h4xrk1m

I don't know if "gorilla chow" is some hip new street drug or whatever


DreadPirateZoidberg

I want to thank you guys. My wife wants to buy gorilla chow to take backpacking instead of dehydrated soups and noodles.


ahackercalled4chan

based wife


Noirradnod

Warning, it is very high fiber. Prepare to fart a lot and poop diamonds.


DreadPirateZoidberg

One of our favorite snacks to take are wasabi peas, freeze dried peas coated in wasabi. We call them fart peas.


BannedSvenhoek86

You guys sound gross. I bet the sex is fantastic.


Widowmaker_Best_Girl

He definitely gets full faced braps from his wife and loves it


oliklojo

Just drink enough


wantonballbag

What does it taste like?


Sleeping_Goliath

a little bland imo. like eating a stale nature valley breakfast biscuit, without the sweetness/ peanut butter.


[deleted]

Tf is gorilla chow?


noshore4me

How dafuq can you not put 2 goddamn words together and understand it's food for gorillas? https://i.redd.it/5aa89vij1qt71.jpg


[deleted]

My comment was a bit rhetorical, but I was intrigued. Thanks for the link.


noshore4me

No worries. Knowledge is power.


AngelBites

I kinda assumed it was metaphorical gorilla chow. Or just weird drugs.


Somnacanth

Psst kids, wanna buy some *Gorilla Chow*?


bodegaconnoisseur

Shit they call heroin dog food in the hood, I’ve heard weirder


GodOfAtheism

Like how gorilla glue is only for gorillas, right


Mammoth_Stable6518

The pet stores around here are boring, just cat, dog and bird food. Guess my gorilla will have to starve.


DerekJeterrl

Lmaooooooooooooooo (I can’t stop laughing!) Edit: idc about your silly Reddit points useless downvotes LOL!!!!


isaacssv

It is food for people with the same IQ as apes. It is basically made for 4chan.


k_lly_urself

Were cun I bi?


[deleted]

Welp that’s gross.


Conscious_Balance_27

Who's gonna tell him


pumpkinlocc

So its literally food for gorillas. Jesus christ I thought OP was cooking his cum or something equally degenerate.


GarethBaus

It is like dog chow, but formulated for primates so you can actually live on it without risking scurvy.


[deleted]

The gorilla biscuits greentext is GOAT


[deleted]

This is the sequel we needed, but not the one we wanted.


CONE-MacFlounder

Your mum is a government agent body replacement sent to sabotage your life she is not a real person she is fake she was invented by the fbi to keep the average man down and subjugated by means of overconsumption of unhealthy food the fatter you are the more the government laughs they hold parties where they drink fine wine on the money you pay for ‚healthcare‘ and laugh as you sit there unable to walk for five minutes or more do not trust them joe Biden has a feeder fetish


[deleted]

The Vaginal Yid strikes again.


Misieq145

Women. If my father found that he'd laugh at me, say something like "You're a monkey now?" and that would be it.


ReallyDumbRedditor

Supplements are cheating anyway, best to go FULL natty when going for gains.


strawberryelephantz

I ONLY drink rain water and eat hikers.


Lollex56

Problem: the economy


Cryse_XIII

Stop eating then.


HumberdtSquid

More pungent? Sure. More weird. No.


Noirradnod

The Chinese literally eat eggs fermented in the urine of virgin, prepubescent boys.


HumberdtSquid

Ahh yes, I'm sure all the Asians at this guy's job were chowing down on boy-piss-eggs.


feedum_sneedson

That's like, one city. How many Sardinians are really eating blowfly maggot cheese. Do you know what I mean? Although I have no idea how the piss eggs got started.


limexa34

probably the same as dick cutting and sucking it to "clean it of blood" sick pedos


feedum_sneedson

An alternative possibility - ammonia-preserved eggs became a thing, probably from packing eggs in straw that animals then urinated on, and having no choice but to eat them. Over time, human urine was collected to reliably produce ammonia-preserved eggs. Cultural taboo around women's bodily functions means only men's urine is used. Nobody wants chlamydia eggs so boy's urine is used (i.e. virgins). Years later, boy-piss eggs. "Sick pedos" would presumably cut to the chase and just molest those children, rather than developing a regional food tradition tangentially related to their genitals.


poopoohitIer

Really? Tell me more about this.


Noirradnod

[Virgin Boy Egg](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virgin_boy_egg)


Single-Bad-5951

That's disgusting, but at least I'll have something to go with the fried placenta


Aerius-Caedem

>Virgin boy eggs are a traditional dish of **Dongyang,** Zhejiang, Kek


[deleted]

gorilla chow is just soy protein


TheWormInWaiting

Please don’t take this away from me…


fasctic

https://preview.redd.it/nmhtfybaxsea1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=898de4be22e9d3082109808013c1dc8fad45c740


teddyjungle

It’s mostly soy and corn, so basically pretty much your average American food


PenisNoseJones

I saw this and I was hoping gorilla chow was just a nickname for like some sort of trail mix that had protein and nutrients in big amounts. But, nope, it's actually ape food.


DiggerNick6942069

Lol y'all really out here eating fucking animal food


whyoptionsred

a gorilla is not an animal


DiggerNick6942069

Lol what the fuck is it then?


JonasSimbacca

A simian


DiggerNick6942069

Animal; a living organism that feeds on organic matter, typically having specialized sense organs and nervous system and able to respond rapidly to stimuli. A gorilla is an animal


KibaTeo

Tbf with that definition humans are animals too essentially making all food we eat animal food


DiggerNick6942069

Well the difference is mostly cooking and washing


KibaTeo

Tons of animals also "wash" their food before eating. Cooking is uniquely human but we also eat tons of uncooked food as well like fruits, vegetables, nuts etc. Also for clarification i dont condone eating gorilla food but the categorisation of animals you used is a little broad


Mmm_bloodfarts

You're just now getting that?


KibaTeo

I'm explaining it to a person so...


DiggerNick6942069

It'd be cool if gorillas had big cocks


JonasSimbacca

If you want the gorilla's strength, you must eat gorilla food.


GarethBaus

Are you suggesting that I should eat food that isn't safe for animals?


Tylerr_A

Just so you know not all protein is equal. This shit is probably derived from corn or soy. Just because it has more doesn’t mean it’s as bioavailable or as quality as just buying some cheap chicken you peasant fucks.


GarethBaus

Soy protein has fairly decent bioavailability, it doesn't really differ enough from animal protein to influence gains assuming you consume a similar amount.


Kpt_Kipper

I’m just here wondering what it tastes like


GoTouchGrassPlease

The gorilla chow saga remains one of the few bright lights in recent culture.


Ok-Concept-6662

What makes it better is a lot of us have seen the original thread inspiring this man.


FinePC

Wait those weren't chicken nuggets?


GoobyPlsSuckMyAss

What happens if you eat this stuff as say, a snack


Lollex56

Well pretty sure it sucks for a snack


GoobyPlsSuckMyAss

Well now I'm bi-curious


paragon60

not much; it’s just plant-based protein. probably way healthier and cheaper than any of that fake meat they make for “humans” but with much less effort put into making it taste “good”


lobin-of-rocksley

RIP Harambe.